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Nobody’s perfect, and everyone messes up from time to time—it’s only human. But a huge part of being a decent person is taking responsibility for your mistakes, learning from them, and also offering an apology if it’s needed. Though, truth be told, not everyone’s good at owning up to what they’ve done—they either get defensive or their ego gets in the way.

Internet user Alexandra (@alexccarterr) went massively viral online after inviting everyone to pretend that the comment section of her post is how guys apologize. Many of the responses she got were hilarious, frustrating, eerily accurate, and sparked a wider discussion about apologies in general. We’ve collected some of the best comments to share with you. Keep scrolling to read them.

Bored Panda reached out to Alexandra, who sparked the massive online discussion, and she was kind enough to share her thoughts on good and bad apologies with us. You'll find our full interview with her below.

Alexandra's online post was viewed over 17.7 million times and received more than 184.1 thousand comments

#1

Text screenshot about frustrating male apologies, featuring a dramatic reaction.

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We were curious about what inspired Alexandra to make the post in the first place and whether she expected such a huge response to it. She told Bored Panda that the internet's response was a complete surprise.

"Honestly. It was a random post that I thought would maybe get my normal 300-view range. I did not expect it to get that much attention," she said.

"I already had a few comments that I knew someone would say. Like the 'idk what you want me to say.' I think it was just something a lot of people related to with men having a hard time expressing emotions and feelings," Alexandra told us.

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    #2

    Screenshot of a sarcastic comment highlighting how some men apologize, with 617.5K likes.

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    #3

    Comment screenshot with apologetic quote, "Sorry you took it that way," highlighting infuriating ways men apologize.

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    We asked Alexandra for her perspective on what lies at the core of a proper apology. She was happy to share her thoughts on this.

    "While saying 'sorry' is sometimes hard, I feel that a true apology is acknowledging that someone feels the way they do," she opened up to Bored Panda.

    "You don’t always have to understand why someone may feel a certain way. You can say 'sorry' without downplaying or neglecting someone’s feelings just because you don’t understand why."

    Alexandra also urged everyone to "always be kind," no matter what.

    #4

    Haley Adams comments on frustrating ways men apologize with 492.5K likes.

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    #5

    Comment highlighting infuriating ways men "apologize" by diverting to irrelevant issues.

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    #6

    Comment on men's apologies: "I'm sorry you feel that way" with upset emoji, 5845 likes.

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    It would be an understatement to say that Alexandra’s post was popular. It was a huge success and literally reached millions of people around the globe. It just goes to show how much a relatable topic with room for humor really resonates with people.

    At the time of writing, her post was viewed 17.7 million times on TikTok. What’s more, it got more than 1.9 million likes and 184.1 thousand comments. Bored Panda has reached out to Alexandra via Instagram for further comment about the popularity of her post, and we’ll update the article as soon as we hear back from her.

    The Harvard Medical School notes that it’s still important to apologize when you’ve hurt or angered someone, even if you don’t believe what you said or did was bad. The same goes for situations where you believe you’re fully in the right and the other person is completely in the wrong: an apology can go a long way.

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    It’s also important to let go of your ideas about who’s right and wrong in the situation and to put yourself in the other person’s shoes. Understanding another person’s experiences is a core part of emotional intelligence, which, in turn, lies at the foundation of healthy and productive relationships.

    #7

    Comment by user "jaylene": "Well sorry I can’t read your mind" with 809.4K likes and a reply icon.

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    #8

    Screenshot of a comment reading, "I'm sorry you feel that way. It wasn't my intention," illustrating ways men apologize.

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    Social media comment with emojis expressing frustration over men's apologies.

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    Naturally, an apology doesn’t really matter if it’s not genuine. If you don’t mean it, why bother saying ‘sorry’ at all? When your apology is genuine, not only do you acknowledge your responsibility for your actions, but you also validate the other person’s (hurt) feelings.

    In short, a real apology shows not only that you’re sorry and that you care about the other individual but that you’re also going to make amends and avoid similar mistakes in the future.

    #10

    Woman's comment on infuriating apology, questioning relationship motives.

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    #11

    Comment from Emily on silent treatment related to men apologizing, with 67.6K likes.

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    #12

    Comment showing frustrating ways men apologize, with text: "I just feel like no matter what I do you're mad at me", 9,941 likes.

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    Psychiatrist and apology expert Dr. Aaron Lazare explained that good apologies have four elements.

    First, you have to acknowledge the offense and confirm that your behavior was unacceptable. One potential pitfall to avoid here is the use of vague or evasive language. You should not word your apology in a way that minimizes your offense or the victim’s level of hurt.

    #13

    Text screenshot with a user comment: "What do you want me to do? I said I’m sorry!" Highlighting apology frustration theme.

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    #14

    Gillian's comment reads “I GUESS IM THE BAD GUY THEN,” highlighting frustrating apologies from men.

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    Nelly's comment on how men apologize with a dismissive remark.

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    Secondly, you should take the time to explain exactly what happened. However, you have to balance things delicately here. You want to offer an explanation without seeming like you’re excusing your behavior.

    With that in mind, the Harvard Medical School points out that sometimes the best strategy is to say that “there is no excuse.”

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    #16

    A text comment reading, "idk what u want me to say," with high engagement on social media.

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    #17

    Screenshot of a comment about men's ways to apologize, saying "I guess I'm just the worst guy ever," with crying emoji.

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    #18

    Comment on problematic ways men apologize, reads "Anything starting with 'I’m sorry, but,'" showing frustration with apologies.

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    The third element of a truly good apology is to express remorse. In short, if you really regret your decision and feel ashamed, you should speak up. The last element is offering to make amends.

    This is fairly straightforward if you’ve physically damaged someone’s things or property; you offer to pay to get it repaired or replace the item. However, when you’ve hurt someone’s feelings, you should acknowledge the pain they felt while promising to do better moving forward.

    #19

    Screenshot of a comment on men apologizing, discussing vague responses and highlighting communication issues.

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    #20

    Text response on social media about men's apologizing ways: "I was literally gonna buy you flowers I thought about it."

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    #21

    Text from a user with 83.2K likes stating sarcastic apology, "I guess the night's ruined now."

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    Reporting on the book ‘Sorry, Sorry, Sorry: The Case for Good Apologies,’ by Marjorie Ingall and Susan McCarthy, NPR states that there are six and a half steps to making great apologies.

    For one, you should say that you’re actually sorry, not that you’re devastated or that you regret something. Furthermore, you should be specific about what it is you’re apologizing for.

    #22

    Comment reading “Your right I’m the bad guy it’s always me sorry,” highlighting ways men apologize.

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    #23

    Comment on infuriating ways men apologize, questioning intent to hurt someone named Nicole.

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    #24

    A comment by Stormie Dawn saying "Believe what you want" with 72.9K likes; relates to frustrating "apologize" tactics.

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    Next, you want to take ownership of your behavior, avoid making excuses, and explain why your mistake won’t happen again in the future. You should also make reparations for your mess-up.

    The last (half of a) step when apologizing is to genuinely listen to the person you’ve hurt so they can have their say.

    #25

    A comment on ways men apologize: “I’m not doing this rn,” by user Kat, expressing frustration.

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    #26

    Sera Nicole comment about infuriating apologies, "I guess I'm just a terrible person idk why you're with me," 11.8K likes.

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    #27

    A comment reads, "then break up with me if you’re so unhappy," highlighting frustrating apologies.

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    According to Ingall, using the word ‘regret’ is all about how you feel while ‘sorry’ is about how the other person feels. In other words, it’s vital to “keep the other person’s feelings at top of mind.”

    A genuine apology can be very powerful even if it comes late, helping people heal and move on.

    #28

    A comment on how some men apologize, showing a user stating "crying so you have to console him instead," with likes and replies.

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    #29

    Comment from Audrey questioning relationship amidst boyfriend apology discussion.

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    #30

    Comment with 71K likes showing an infuriating apology, blaming past events for current behavior.

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    How good would you say you are at apologizing, dear Pandas? How often do you run into people who make half-baked apologies or try to twist the situation in their favor? What is the very best apology that you’ve ever received?

    Why do you think people find it so difficult to take responsibility for their actions? If you have a free moment, share your thoughts in the comments below.

    #31

    Comment from Alexus saying, "I feel like nothing I do for you is ever good enough," highlighting an infuriating apology from men.

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    #32

    Text screenshot showing a sarcastic comment about men apologizing, focusing on trivial details instead of the issue.

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    #33

    Screenshot of chat showing infuriating apologies, with humorous emojis and high engagement.

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    #34

    Comment by Sophie with eye-roll emoji: "I'm sorry you feel like you need an apology."

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    #35

    Isabelle comments, "Yea I'm not reading all that," highlighting ways men "apologize" with over 748.8K likes.

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    #36

    Comment by aliianaaaavf expressing frustration with a sarcastic apology about having friends.

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    #37

    Comment on men's apologies causing high blood pressure, with 177.8K likes.

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    #38

    Comment on how some men "apologize" with frustration: "I'll just delete everything then," with high engagement count.

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    #39

    Comment saying, "not true but ok," highlighting infuriating apologies with 20.2K likes.

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    #40

    Comment screenshot with text: "It's just a jokeeeee," related to men apologizing.

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    #41

    Comment showing frustrating men's apologies: "This is literally who I am.. I can’t change that."

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    #42

    Comment saying, "This is why I didn't tell you," highlighting ways men "apologize."

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    #43

    Comment by user Spaghettioops on infuriating ways men "apologize," expressing sarcasm about joking.

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    #44

    A comment on ways men apologize, saying, "I only lied because I knew you'd be mad," with likes and reply icons.

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    #45

    "Wes comments on ways men apologize, noting miscommunication between arguing and expressing feelings."

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    #46

    Comment highlights frustrating male apologies, expressing silent treatment.

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    #47

    Comment showing a typical insincere apology, "Calm down," with high interactions.

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    #48

    "Facebook comment from Lane saying 'Believe what you want sorry' highlighting frustrating apologies from men."

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    #49

    Comment from a user named Liam182 demonstrates infuriating apology by saying, "I just think you overreacted but maybe that’s my fault."

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    #50

    Man's apology comment with victimizing behavior, 328 likes.

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    #51

    Comment by user questioning typical apologies, receiving thousands of likes.

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    #52

    Comment on men’s “apologize” methods: “I’m just can’t do anything right. Ever.”

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    #53

    Comment on ineffective apologies, showing a person describing a scenario of shifting blame during an apology.

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    #54

    Comment screenshot about ways men apologize, saying, "Sorry I'll leave you alone now," with 241.8K likes.

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    #55

    Comment on apology methods from men, suggesting breakup, 5214 likes.

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    #56

    Comment by Shawndee saying, "I don’t deserve you," highlighting ways men "apologize."

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    #57

    Comment highlighting frustrating ways men apologize, with quote: "everyone just leaves me anyways," liked by 22.1K users.

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    #58

    Comment highlighting a man's silent treatment apology, implying nothing happened, with over 2,297 likes.

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    #59

    Text screenshot showing a woman's comment on frustrating apologies from men.

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    #60

    Haven H comment on men's ways of apologizing, "Bro I don’t even remember saying that," with likes and replies shown.

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    #61

    Comment by Ileanna Puertas: "Well do you understand my perspective?" highlighting common apology issues with men.

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    #62

    Comment on excuses people use when apologizing, mentioning personal life impacts.

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    #63

    Comment from Elyora saying, "Bruh im sorry but its not that deep," highlighting infuriating apologies from men.

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    #64

    Kate's comment on men's apology: "you know i'm not good at communication, you KNOW that" with reactions and likes.

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    #65

    A comment by user "ava" reading "ok" with 32.7K likes, discussing men's ways of apologizing.

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    #66

    Bailey’s comment about a grandfather’s fish dying, with 4,782 likes.

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    #67

    Social media comment saying, “I'm sorry, I guess I can't do anything right,” highlighting frustrating apologies.

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    #68

    Comment highlighting frustrating ways men "apologize," mentioning 3 days of ignoring followed by a casual greeting.

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    #69

    Spicy Sofia on YouTube shares a comment about inadequate apologies from men, noting a tiny reply to her lengthy message.

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