Hey Pandas, AITA For Finding A New Home For My Dog After My Girlfriend Walked Out?

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I recently read a story shared by another member, and it inspired me to share my own experience, as it felt somewhat similar. Sorry in advance – this is going to be long, but I really need an outside perspective.

I (32M) moved abroad about a year ago. My girlfriend (30F) and I had been together for almost five years, and we shared a rescue dog, Gus.

We’d both been struggling financially in our home country, and I got the chance to move abroad for better work opportunities. The plan was: I’d go first, get settled, find a job, save up, and then she’d come join me with Gus once things were stable. She agreed completely and promised she’d look after him while I got everything sorted.

Those first few months were rough. I started from scratch – new language, no friends, no family, no support network.

Luckily, I found a job within two weeks and threw myself into work

Man in a suit with backpack looking at busy city street representing dilemma of rehoming dog after being abandoned abroad

Image credits: Saulo Mohana (not the actual photo)

I didn’t go out much, but I tried to make a few friends just to keep sane.

Meanwhile, my girlfriend’s messages were getting shorter and colder. Whenever we talked, she sounded annoyed or distant. She’d say she “missed me,” but never really asked how I was doing. I figured it was just the stress of distance – long-distance relationships are hard, right? I kept telling myself, “I’m doing all this for us.”

After six months, I finally managed to rent a small cottage that allowed dogs– a nightmare to find in this city

Cozy white house with a glass porch, green door, and garden, symbolizing rehoming a dog after being abandoned abroad.

Image credits: Valerie (not the actual photo)

I was proud and excited. I arranged her flight and even booked professional pet transport for Gus. Everything was ready for our fresh start.

When she arrived… it wasn’t the reunion I imagined. She was polite but distant, almost like a guest. I thought maybe we just needed time to reconnect. But instead of settling in, she started going out – a lot. Clubbing, meeting new people, spending money she didn’t have.

I gently tried to talk to her about finding a job or helping with bills, but she brushed it off. 

After a month, I finally gave her an ultimatum: either we start working on things, or we admit it’s over.

She didn’t hesitate – she just said, “Maybe it’s time we stop pretending this is working,” and left the next day

Two people sitting on a bench overlooking a city at night, reflecting the story about rehoming a dog abroad.

Image credits: Christian Lue (not the actual photo)

She moved into a shared flat elsewhere in the city and blocked me on social media.

That left me alone with Gus.

Gus is an amazing dog – affectionate, playful, and loyal – but he has severe separation anxiety

Close-up of a sad dog indoors, highlighting emotions linked to rehoming and abandonment challenges abroad.

Image credits: Samuel Yongbo Kwon (not the actual photo)

Back home, he was rarely alone because my girlfriend worked from home. I, on the other hand, work full-time and can’t bring him to the office.

At first, I tried to make it work: rushing home on breaks, hiring dog walkers, asking my boss if I could work part-time. I even tried leaving him with friends occasionally. But it wasn’t enough. Gus barked all day, destroyed furniture, and my neighbors started complaining. I got two written warnings from my landlord.

The stress was eating me alive. I could see Gus was miserable – shaking when I grabbed my keys, whining non-stop. It broke my heart to watch him suffer, and I felt trapped.

After a lot of crying and guilt, I started looking for a new home for him – not just anyone, but the right one

Person sitting alone by the ocean at dusk, reflecting on rehoming dog after girlfriend abandoned them abroad

Image credits: Chris Riggs (not the actual photo)

I joined Facebook groups, called shelters, and interviewed potential adopters. Finally, I found a woman back in our home country who already had a friendly golden retriever. She even offered to fly out, spend a few days with Gus and me, and make sure they bonded.

When she came, Gus adored her instantly

Woman kneeling and comforting her dog indoors, reflecting the situation of rehoming a dog after abandonment abroad.

Image credits: Samuel Yongbo Kwon (not the actual photo)

They connected right away. It felt like fate, but also like betrayal.

After signing all the adoption papers and arranging his travel, I sent Gus off with his new owner. Watching him leave was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.

He’s doing great now – they send me updates, pictures of him at the park, sleeping on the couch, happy again. I know I did the right thing for him. But every night, I still feel like I failed him.

I just don’t know if I did the right thing — would love some perspective.

Moderator’s note

Please be aware that the images used in this article are illustrative only and do not depict the actual people or events described.

If you’ve experienced something similar or have a story you’d like to share, we welcome submissions from our community, including anonymous ones. You can send your story directly to community@boredpanda.com to be shared anonymously, or upload it through our Bored Panda submission form by clicking here. We review community stories regularly, and some may be featured in upcoming posts.

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