This tortoise did drugs, drove drunk, and looked at tortoise pornography while his master was away. At least, that’s what happened according to photos sent by the owner’s boyfriend, who was left to take care of this tortoise. So much for his girlfriend’s request to “keep him out of trouble!”


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Tortoises have the longest lifespan of any land animal, so it’s not recommended to “party” like the tortoise below. The oldest tortoise is said to have lived to 188 years of age, but it’s likely that he refrained from wild nights like the one seen here.

Source: Consent_van

“She told me to keep him out of trouble”

Finally, a boys night alone

It got pretty wild!