Unless you’re Canadian, you’re not doing anyone any favors by saying “sorry” all the time. In fact, being overly apologetic can lead a person to start feeling guilty about being themselves. The power of words and self-conditioning with them is a capable thing, and the more you say sorry, the more you are likely to feel guilty when there’s no need for that. Of course, simple politeness goes a long way, but in this case, that’s not what we’re talking about.
New York-based artist Yao Xiao takes this a step further in her cute drawings, where she suggests that you should say thank you instead. The Internet is full of empty promises and terrible art, but this idea is worth paying attention to; see how being thankful instead of sorry plays out below.
Yao Xiao was born in China but now lives in New York. Many of her comics are autobiographical, and she describes herself as an “enthusiast for queer fashion, vintage cabaret, collecting odd objects, and absurd science fiction with a flair of whimsy.” The rest of Xiao’s work is quite different from the comics below, so be sure to check out her website, but for now, learn how to get that ‘sorry not sorry’ attitude.
More info: yaoxiaoart.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | Tumblr (h/t: brightside)
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Share on FacebookAt Starbucks, we say "thanks for your patience guys" instead of "sorry about the wait guys."
Isn't that the common phrase ised in every professional environment anyway? I mean, never thought about it, but now that you mention it....
Load More Replies...We're affected by our cultural conditioning so reminders like these are supportive and beneficial. I have lived in environments where people said "sorry" a lot and sometimes don't even know why they are saying it, so it can get you down. These cartoons are enlightening, entertaining and most importantly bringing to our conscious mind things that we might do unconsciously. Well done Yao Xiao and Dainius.
Companies do this, and it feels manipulative to me. Thank you for your patience, thank you for your understanding. Instead of taking responsibility for their negative action, they try to dump it back on you by telling you what your reaction is supposed to be.
I totally agree! anyways, this is an issue that varies greatly with culture. In Japan, saying sorry is always the right thing to do. Even when it is someone else who messed up. I tend to agree with them. If you thank me, you have presumed I have already forgiven you and it feels passive-aggressive.
Load More Replies...If you're always saying sorry you probably WANT to say sorry all the time. I think "if you want to say you're sorry, try thanking people instead" would make more sense. Sometimes a "sorry" can be appropriate, I think, if you did something you really regret and think "that was kind of a douche move". But changing your mindset to focus on the bright side of the coin instead of the filthy and submissive side is a very good idea.
When someone is late (and sadly I am guilty of this often but getting better), I think an apology is in order. Along with a thank you for your patience, for waiting, for the wait, etc. I like the others though.
There are more reasons to use "sorry" frequently than just being a Canadian - like when you're IN Canada. Remember, the "Golden Rule" doesn't work globally. That's because when dealing across cultures, treating others the way YOU want to be treated isn't what matters. It's about treating others the way THEY want to be treated. In our culture apologizing essentially means admitting fault. But that doesn't apply in other cultures where "sorry" is often used to acknowledge a disagreement, disappointment, misunderstanding without taking accountability. Do we ever say we're sorry when we have no reason to be? You bet we do. If a friend says he's getting divorced, do you say, "Thank you for letting me know she''ll soon be available?" If you're in a car accident, would you want to hear, "Thanks for calling and telling us you weren't coming?" When someone passes away in any situation does "thank you" substitute for "sorry" ? Sorry if this was long. But thanks for reading. :-)
*knocking over old lady* "Thank you for complying with my rudeness."
Thanking someone in advance before apologizing is kinda presumptuous and rude. If people don't apologize for their dumbshit they can gtfo, because there's no inclination on their part on correcting their future dumbass indulgence. e.g ...thank you for your understanding........ (but i'm not sorry i forgot where i put your car keys)
Of course! I'm glad someone thinks the same way I do about this sort of discount psychology.
Load More Replies...Vampires is not at all like in the movies or books. Sure, I understand. You are young you have the whole world open to you. You can be anything that you choose if you apply yourself and try hard to work toward that goal. But being a Vampire is not what it seems like. It’s a life full of good, and amazing things. We are as human as you are.. It’s not what you are that counts, But how you choose to be. Do you want a life full of interesting things? Do you want to have power and influence over others? To be charming and desirable? To have wealth, health, and longevity? kindly contact the vampire kingdom whatsApp at +1 431 804 7964 or on their email worldofvampir@hotmail.com
are you SURE it's not wrong for me to exist? I feel like there's something wrong with me existing.
Yes, this is what we all want, simple anecdotes to make life pleasanter, making all of us happy! I don't feel sorry to say a big THANK YOU!
I am Canadian and this really opened my eyes, I apologize to furniture I bump into :)
You can not get away with not saying sorry 5000000 times a day in England. And you should definitely apologize for not apologizing enough!
All except the first image. Habitual lateness is pathological rudeness.
"Thank you for not knowing that I cheated on you by sleeping with your best friend."
Nope. It's actually quite inspirational and empowering. But I admit I'd be kinda shy to thank so much....
Load More Replies...At Starbucks, we say "thanks for your patience guys" instead of "sorry about the wait guys."
Isn't that the common phrase ised in every professional environment anyway? I mean, never thought about it, but now that you mention it....
Load More Replies...We're affected by our cultural conditioning so reminders like these are supportive and beneficial. I have lived in environments where people said "sorry" a lot and sometimes don't even know why they are saying it, so it can get you down. These cartoons are enlightening, entertaining and most importantly bringing to our conscious mind things that we might do unconsciously. Well done Yao Xiao and Dainius.
Companies do this, and it feels manipulative to me. Thank you for your patience, thank you for your understanding. Instead of taking responsibility for their negative action, they try to dump it back on you by telling you what your reaction is supposed to be.
I totally agree! anyways, this is an issue that varies greatly with culture. In Japan, saying sorry is always the right thing to do. Even when it is someone else who messed up. I tend to agree with them. If you thank me, you have presumed I have already forgiven you and it feels passive-aggressive.
Load More Replies...If you're always saying sorry you probably WANT to say sorry all the time. I think "if you want to say you're sorry, try thanking people instead" would make more sense. Sometimes a "sorry" can be appropriate, I think, if you did something you really regret and think "that was kind of a douche move". But changing your mindset to focus on the bright side of the coin instead of the filthy and submissive side is a very good idea.
When someone is late (and sadly I am guilty of this often but getting better), I think an apology is in order. Along with a thank you for your patience, for waiting, for the wait, etc. I like the others though.
There are more reasons to use "sorry" frequently than just being a Canadian - like when you're IN Canada. Remember, the "Golden Rule" doesn't work globally. That's because when dealing across cultures, treating others the way YOU want to be treated isn't what matters. It's about treating others the way THEY want to be treated. In our culture apologizing essentially means admitting fault. But that doesn't apply in other cultures where "sorry" is often used to acknowledge a disagreement, disappointment, misunderstanding without taking accountability. Do we ever say we're sorry when we have no reason to be? You bet we do. If a friend says he's getting divorced, do you say, "Thank you for letting me know she''ll soon be available?" If you're in a car accident, would you want to hear, "Thanks for calling and telling us you weren't coming?" When someone passes away in any situation does "thank you" substitute for "sorry" ? Sorry if this was long. But thanks for reading. :-)
*knocking over old lady* "Thank you for complying with my rudeness."
Thanking someone in advance before apologizing is kinda presumptuous and rude. If people don't apologize for their dumbshit they can gtfo, because there's no inclination on their part on correcting their future dumbass indulgence. e.g ...thank you for your understanding........ (but i'm not sorry i forgot where i put your car keys)
Of course! I'm glad someone thinks the same way I do about this sort of discount psychology.
Load More Replies...Vampires is not at all like in the movies or books. Sure, I understand. You are young you have the whole world open to you. You can be anything that you choose if you apply yourself and try hard to work toward that goal. But being a Vampire is not what it seems like. It’s a life full of good, and amazing things. We are as human as you are.. It’s not what you are that counts, But how you choose to be. Do you want a life full of interesting things? Do you want to have power and influence over others? To be charming and desirable? To have wealth, health, and longevity? kindly contact the vampire kingdom whatsApp at +1 431 804 7964 or on their email worldofvampir@hotmail.com
are you SURE it's not wrong for me to exist? I feel like there's something wrong with me existing.
Yes, this is what we all want, simple anecdotes to make life pleasanter, making all of us happy! I don't feel sorry to say a big THANK YOU!
I am Canadian and this really opened my eyes, I apologize to furniture I bump into :)
You can not get away with not saying sorry 5000000 times a day in England. And you should definitely apologize for not apologizing enough!
All except the first image. Habitual lateness is pathological rudeness.
"Thank you for not knowing that I cheated on you by sleeping with your best friend."
Nope. It's actually quite inspirational and empowering. But I admit I'd be kinda shy to thank so much....
Load More Replies...
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