Concerned Parent Asks How To Make Their Daughter Stop Crying After They Yell At Her, Gets The Best Response
Parenting is hard. Especially if you have a child who won’t stop weeping. You scream your lungs out, pointing our their every mistake, and nothing. Still, they turn to tears instead of silently internalizing your rage. Not too long ago, a parent had been suffering from this problem so much, they turned to Quora. “How do I teach my 16-year-old daughter not to cry when I yell at her for doing something wrong,” they asked. The little brat must’ve shed at least an ocean of tears if their caretakers had to humiliate themselves before the internet, asking for help. Luckily, a woman who went through the exact same thing responded. Scroll down to read her response to learn how to deal with such a nuisance yourself.
Not too long ago, a parent asked this question on Quora
This woman responded sharing her own experience
Image credits: Alicia Jordan
Moved by Alicia’s response, others started relating as well
Others weren’t so quick to blame the parent
What do you think?
My father was an angry man who used to take out his frustrations on me. I was later diagnosis-ed with PTSD. Yelling and screaming only builds resentment. I suggest getting an outside opinion from a professional you trust. Sometimes you need someone who is removed from the situation and has wisdom and experience to help you navigate the forest from the trees. Parenting is a skill and just because you love your kids does not mean that your skills can't be improved on.
To those who think we’re judging on too little information: The fact this woman is asking for advice as to how to handle her understandably emotional daughter’s reaction to her yelling (emotional action) kind of gives all the information we need. It’s hard to learn good lessons through yelling and tears regardless of the mistake.
My poorly made point is, the mother is asking for advice on FUTURE yellings (how to stop her daughters tears) as the past yellings have not yielded good results (duh). She's not asking whether she should change her behavior, just how to stop her daughter's reaction. What does she want instead, silence? dead-eyed stare? a grateful hug and thanks?
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My mother yelled at all of us for the littlest things, like not doing something quickly enough. I never really knew what would set her off and lived in constant fear that I would do something wrong. The yelling and the accompanying put-downs ("Can't you do anything right!") could be so brutal; it would simply reduce me to tears. I totally get why anyone, much less a child, would cry when she gets yelled at. My question to the mother : why are you yelling? And does it solve the issue at hand? I don't know about you, but it's never fun to be yelled at. In fact, it can be downright terrifying. If she's crying because you are yelling at her, then the simple answer is to stop yelling. Find another way to express your disappoint, anger, or fear.
I have the same issue, my mom used to yell at me constantly and I felt I was never good enough or will never amount to anything. there's a lot of mental scars left from that. I had therapy for quite a while to address the issue. My mom realized she had pre-menopausal symptoms during my youth and basically- all of that translated to lashing out at me. Now I still have problems sometimes identifying normal conversations where people just want to talk and mean no harm which affects my personal relationships to a degree. But I recognize that now and I actively try to identify my own behavior and think differently. So to answer this mom- don't yell but talk to your daughter. Growing up is tough enough already. In my experience anyway, yelling usually pushed me away from wanting to talk to my mom.
I so with my English could be better to express my feelings at this moment. This post almost made me cry in a ramen restaurant. I have been yelled at, kicked at, slapped at, spanked by hangers (until they broke) from maybe 3-22 (I'm going to be 23 in July) . I'm doing great, doing my master's in a prestigious university in Europe, having friends and hobbies etc. But few know that I've always been struggling deep in my heart. I have depression and anxiety. I have nightmares and flashbacks of my parents abusing me. And I know that I've always been seeking for appreciation no matter how much I already got. My therapist said it's like a blackhole of mine. You know what is the worst? I still don't fully believe that my parents
What my parents done is wrong. Because they are my PARENTS, they also gave me food and care. I can't stop feeling guilty, feeling I deserved it, for a second. When you yell at your children, just think of this. You don't understand how hard it is for he or she to understand this. "Why my PARENTS, who claimed they loved me the most in the world are doing this to me. I must be the worst person in the whole universe ". Just F**king think of this. I'm begging everyone here, parents or future parents.
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wh..how many times does this lady yell at her daughter that she needs to know how to get her to stop crying? I hope it isn't a regular thing.
It doesn't matter if you talk or yell. If all you do is reprimand and criticise, you destroy self esteem and breed resentment. And when you're gone, you're child will feel guilty for being grateful and knowing their life is easier and happier without you. Trust me, I know. Treat your child with respect, educate them in right and wrong but above all make them feel valued and loved.
Why the yelling, though? Why not talk it through like civilized people...? I understand some people are impulsive, and I understand suppressing anger can lead to depression, but you can offer an apology and talk it out when both of you calm down.
Indeed, not easy to know the good balance between compromise and authority... Because being too soft can be as damaging as being too severe...
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Nobody likes being yelled at. Yelling is dominating and aggressive. We train supervisors not to yell at employees but claim it is a matter of "context" when it comes to children. Yelling at your children is destructive. My mother was a screamer, and i became one. I would take a brief break and come out and apologize to my children, then we would talk about the real issue. Eventually, thank god, it became a very rare occurrence. https://www.healthline.com/health/parenting/yelling-at-kids#1 https://www.webmd.com/parenting/features/stop-yelling-at-your-kids https://psychology-spot.com/screaming-to-children-damages-their/
Maybe stop yelling and start talking? Yelling is pretty much one way communication.
Yep. But really, sometimes there is no room for discussion... I mean, my daughter is the best, but even her can be a pain in the a sometimes. She needs to know that I think, so she can become the perfect person she is meant to be.
Load More Replies... My dad used to yell at me about the dumbest things and it always hurt and always made me cry, but as I grew up I realized how much stress he was under; raising a daughter on his own and working 14+ hours a day at a job he hated just to take care of me... I know he didn’t mean to hurt me, he was just incredibly stressed out and didn’t want anymore stress at home. I’m 28 now and will always appreciate everything he sacrificed for me. He is my best buddy and my biggest hero.
I have PTSD from yelling and screaming. My nieces also believe this is the way to parent their children because this is how we grew up. It's an ugly cycle that has caused enormous pain to the children in my family. Sometimes being screamed at an put down is worse than being slapped or hit. Words can cut like a knife, and so can the tone of someone's voice.
Ah, no you don't have PTSD from yelling and screaming.
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I really hated being shouted at by my dad when I was a child and found it scared me too much to think clearly about anything I might have done. Now I get upset when I hear other children being shouted at. To me yelling just shows loss of control. I've not had children though, only been a child who remembers what it was like.
Unfortunately this happened with me and my mum. I had to take the lead and tell her that yelling at me wasn't the answer. It took her a few months, almost a year actually, but she's a lot better now. My heart goes out to out to anyone who has a parent(s) like this xxx
Well done for taking the initiative and good on your mum for listening and actually doing something to change! I'm really glad it worked for you. I tried talking to my dad and got nowhere but we had lots of other issues. Anyway, definitely Clara Not An Idiot!
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These questions are asked on Quora all the time, generally by people without a written profile, just trying to get attention. It could have been genuine but from my experience on Quora I doubt it was. Still, the answers were good. They always are.
When you yell and hit, even occasionally, you're pushing them away. They won't tell you anything. They'll lie and the might even forge you're signature. There might be a close relationship but it won't be that close because they will always be afraid of being yelled at or hit.
The first comment about the father pretty much sums up my own father. I know what that person went trough. Everything is just the same.
It's always made me wonder why they don't teach parenting in grade school and high school. Older folks might think it's too soon but if not then, when?
this is really sad and thats the thing ,its true, i have the same experience. My mother always yells at me for even the littlest things that i did wrong like forgetting about something and so we would argue for days in the end and often she would ask me to stop crying and you shouldn't besides its your fault, so yeah im trying to stop and yeah its true. so to all the parents out there. don't start to tell your child just to stop crying eventhough you yelled at them, its not just their fault its kind of you too since you were the one who yelled at them meaning that you were also the one who made them cry. trust me you do not want to tell them to stop doing so, im pretty much just going down that path right now and now i have issues trying to express my emotions because of it
Sorry, but where I come from "to yell at" is just another way to say "to reprimand". There's no detail to this woman's post, it could easily be that she's asking how to get to a point where her daughter doesn't cry every time she tells her she's done something wrong, or asks her to do something..
I wonder why people are willing to keep toxic people in their life. If I'm in that position I'd be kicking them out of my life already.
Stupidly vague question receives answer that is extremely precise and narrowly focused on responders own issues. Without her detailing what it is that she is yelling at her daughter for it's impossible to answer in any meaningful way, is the kid skipping school to smoke Meth with her 30 year old boyfriend or is it something stupid like not setting the table properly, how do you answer this?
While I wholeheartedly agree with your statement (wanting advice with too little information), yelling at a 16-year-old is never the solution regardless of the "crime". Take it from a household of yellers, once that starts it just locks up any progress toward a solution. A yell might work when a toddler is about to run into a street (or other such danger) but it will never "teach" a child old enough reason and discuss.
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I don't know if i should even be here, or anyone would see this... But hi! Im 14 yrs and my mom keeps on yelling and hitting me, blaming everything i do. literally for sleeping to accidentally slamming the door. i've lost count of how many times i've almost cried my eyes out till it got hard to breath and lost count of how many bruises she inflicted upon me. She says the absolute most idiotic things i've ever heard! she always says thats its fro my on good, that i'm too young or too old to be this or that or to act the way i do.. Most of the times she yells at me and hit me, i cant help but feel like maybe its all my fault? maybe i should just give in and follow everything she says? It hurts like hell when i try to keep all my emotions in, and its even harder to be happy and smile for once in my abusive life. First she says i'm too young to do what i want in life and then she says that i'm too old to be dramatic. i just don't know how much longer i can take all this...
My first impression is that the mother does a lot of yelling at her daughter, A LOT. She doesn't like her daughters response of crying every time and wants the crying to stop. It's hard to give advice based on the very small tidbit we've been offered. My gut feeling is that the mother is yelling too much, and what needs to change is the mothers yelling. If she wants a different reaction from her daughter than crying, but expects the crying to stop continuing her yelling pattern is madness really. She knows the reaction that yelling brings, therefore she needs to change how she approaches the situation of her daughters bad behavior.
What about not yelling at her at all? Seriously, take a deep breath and remember being that age, think before you say anything and even if you are fuming, try and be calm, yelling is so pointless for you and her. This will be all she remembers when she's older - my mom yelling at me for making mistakes - this is how we learn, and we can make them when we are younger, we are entitled to! Try to be more patient, difficult I know, but it will pay off when she is older and save your relationship.
I replied to this question on Quora, so I'm not going to repeat it here.
I stopped answering the phone, when mom called. She spent the next seventeen years sending me notes about how horribly I was treating her, but she never uttered one word of apology for the things she did to me. Finally, she died. Good riddance.
Both my parents were yellers and beaters. My dad beat me nearly to death when I was 6 years old. I'm 67 old now. They both died 3 weeks apart, 25 years ago. I never shed a tear for them nor have I ever missed them. In fact, I was cracking jokes during their funeral masses!
Good point, but bear in mind that not all children react the same. For example, my mother used to yell a hell of a lot when I was a teenager. Both to me and my brothers and sisters. Some took it hard, never fully recovering. Other got over it and learnt how to deal with it. I am part of the latter group. Why? I have absolutely no clue...
The sad thing is this is how I have become with my father. He was impatient, and never took interest or cared about me when I was younger, never involved me in anything he did, while he taught my brother how to drive I may as well have been invisible. And for years I just wanted him to be involved, to actually care about anything I did or ask about my interests. But now, I don't care what he thinks, he tries to say things to me but it's too late, I don't care, nothing will make it better because there's no bond there, I may as well just be living with a roommate I don't particularly get along with, I just try and avoid him now, I don't seek his opinion, and I don't tell him anything of my personal life, it's too little too late.
So the mother should pat the girl on the head when she does wrong?,this is the reason children have no moral in the west
No, but yelling certainly isn't the answer. The two can have a civilized discussion.
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I do too hate it when people yell at me and does nor motivate me but makes me just turn my back on it. BUT!!! we indeed do not know what the child has done, in what situation the parent is and I also know that in some situations I should have not just been yelled at but be slapped af for the things I used To do To p**s off my parents and show them my "independence" and now I am glad for those situations when they were pushed To the edge by my stupidity, so now I know where some limits are. How do WE outsiders know if This child is not simply "emotionally abusing" her MOM, by always showing herself as "weak". There are people who are This manipulative even when they grow up!
If she's doing some simple things like not cleaning her room or something theres no reason to yell...If thats the case the mom doesn't deserve a kid.
Maybe I am being harsh - but at 16 this is not a good reaction and she needs to toughen up. She is only a couple of years from the real world of college and/or work. Bursting into tears every time your boss chews you out for screwing up will not get you far. It really needs to be adressed right now.
The kid needs to toughen up implies that she's the problem. Maybe she is, we can't know for sure. The root cause is the yelling. Address the yelling and you take away the reason for the crying. If mom isn't yelling, then this teenager cannot fall on that crutch of crying. Because that's what the crying has become - a crutch. Then you have a young adult who cannot handle any sort of criticism because she's been conditioned to equate all criticism with yelling. It's a vicious cycle and the mom is aware enough to want to address and fix it.
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Depends on the reason for shouting. I mean, if the girl was yelled at for doing some stupid s**t she knew not to do for valid reasons, she's got it coming. She gets yelled at because she forgot to do the dishes one time, then shouting at her till she cries is too harsh. Same opinion as EasyCheeze1978.
I nice thing about having critical parents is you learn to deal with criticism, hopefully in a constructive way.
My father was an angry man who used to take out his frustrations on me. I was later diagnosis-ed with PTSD. Yelling and screaming only builds resentment. I suggest getting an outside opinion from a professional you trust. Sometimes you need someone who is removed from the situation and has wisdom and experience to help you navigate the forest from the trees. Parenting is a skill and just because you love your kids does not mean that your skills can't be improved on.
To those who think we’re judging on too little information: The fact this woman is asking for advice as to how to handle her understandably emotional daughter’s reaction to her yelling (emotional action) kind of gives all the information we need. It’s hard to learn good lessons through yelling and tears regardless of the mistake.
My poorly made point is, the mother is asking for advice on FUTURE yellings (how to stop her daughters tears) as the past yellings have not yielded good results (duh). She's not asking whether she should change her behavior, just how to stop her daughter's reaction. What does she want instead, silence? dead-eyed stare? a grateful hug and thanks?
Load More Replies... My mother yelled at all of us for the littlest things, like not doing something quickly enough. I never really knew what would set her off and lived in constant fear that I would do something wrong. The yelling and the accompanying put-downs ("Can't you do anything right!") could be so brutal; it would simply reduce me to tears. I totally get why anyone, much less a child, would cry when she gets yelled at. My question to the mother : why are you yelling? And does it solve the issue at hand? I don't know about you, but it's never fun to be yelled at. In fact, it can be downright terrifying. If she's crying because you are yelling at her, then the simple answer is to stop yelling. Find another way to express your disappoint, anger, or fear.
I have the same issue, my mom used to yell at me constantly and I felt I was never good enough or will never amount to anything. there's a lot of mental scars left from that. I had therapy for quite a while to address the issue. My mom realized she had pre-menopausal symptoms during my youth and basically- all of that translated to lashing out at me. Now I still have problems sometimes identifying normal conversations where people just want to talk and mean no harm which affects my personal relationships to a degree. But I recognize that now and I actively try to identify my own behavior and think differently. So to answer this mom- don't yell but talk to your daughter. Growing up is tough enough already. In my experience anyway, yelling usually pushed me away from wanting to talk to my mom.
I so with my English could be better to express my feelings at this moment. This post almost made me cry in a ramen restaurant. I have been yelled at, kicked at, slapped at, spanked by hangers (until they broke) from maybe 3-22 (I'm going to be 23 in July) . I'm doing great, doing my master's in a prestigious university in Europe, having friends and hobbies etc. But few know that I've always been struggling deep in my heart. I have depression and anxiety. I have nightmares and flashbacks of my parents abusing me. And I know that I've always been seeking for appreciation no matter how much I already got. My therapist said it's like a blackhole of mine. You know what is the worst? I still don't fully believe that my parents
What my parents done is wrong. Because they are my PARENTS, they also gave me food and care. I can't stop feeling guilty, feeling I deserved it, for a second. When you yell at your children, just think of this. You don't understand how hard it is for he or she to understand this. "Why my PARENTS, who claimed they loved me the most in the world are doing this to me. I must be the worst person in the whole universe ". Just F**king think of this. I'm begging everyone here, parents or future parents.
Load More Replies... wh..how many times does this lady yell at her daughter that she needs to know how to get her to stop crying? I hope it isn't a regular thing.
It doesn't matter if you talk or yell. If all you do is reprimand and criticise, you destroy self esteem and breed resentment. And when you're gone, you're child will feel guilty for being grateful and knowing their life is easier and happier without you. Trust me, I know. Treat your child with respect, educate them in right and wrong but above all make them feel valued and loved.
Why the yelling, though? Why not talk it through like civilized people...? I understand some people are impulsive, and I understand suppressing anger can lead to depression, but you can offer an apology and talk it out when both of you calm down.
Indeed, not easy to know the good balance between compromise and authority... Because being too soft can be as damaging as being too severe...
Load More Replies... Nobody likes being yelled at. Yelling is dominating and aggressive. We train supervisors not to yell at employees but claim it is a matter of "context" when it comes to children. Yelling at your children is destructive. My mother was a screamer, and i became one. I would take a brief break and come out and apologize to my children, then we would talk about the real issue. Eventually, thank god, it became a very rare occurrence. https://www.healthline.com/health/parenting/yelling-at-kids#1 https://www.webmd.com/parenting/features/stop-yelling-at-your-kids https://psychology-spot.com/screaming-to-children-damages-their/
Maybe stop yelling and start talking? Yelling is pretty much one way communication.
Yep. But really, sometimes there is no room for discussion... I mean, my daughter is the best, but even her can be a pain in the a sometimes. She needs to know that I think, so she can become the perfect person she is meant to be.
Load More Replies... My dad used to yell at me about the dumbest things and it always hurt and always made me cry, but as I grew up I realized how much stress he was under; raising a daughter on his own and working 14+ hours a day at a job he hated just to take care of me... I know he didn’t mean to hurt me, he was just incredibly stressed out and didn’t want anymore stress at home. I’m 28 now and will always appreciate everything he sacrificed for me. He is my best buddy and my biggest hero.
I have PTSD from yelling and screaming. My nieces also believe this is the way to parent their children because this is how we grew up. It's an ugly cycle that has caused enormous pain to the children in my family. Sometimes being screamed at an put down is worse than being slapped or hit. Words can cut like a knife, and so can the tone of someone's voice.
Ah, no you don't have PTSD from yelling and screaming.
Load More Replies... I really hated being shouted at by my dad when I was a child and found it scared me too much to think clearly about anything I might have done. Now I get upset when I hear other children being shouted at. To me yelling just shows loss of control. I've not had children though, only been a child who remembers what it was like.
Unfortunately this happened with me and my mum. I had to take the lead and tell her that yelling at me wasn't the answer. It took her a few months, almost a year actually, but she's a lot better now. My heart goes out to out to anyone who has a parent(s) like this xxx
Well done for taking the initiative and good on your mum for listening and actually doing something to change! I'm really glad it worked for you. I tried talking to my dad and got nowhere but we had lots of other issues. Anyway, definitely Clara Not An Idiot!
Load More Replies... These questions are asked on Quora all the time, generally by people without a written profile, just trying to get attention. It could have been genuine but from my experience on Quora I doubt it was. Still, the answers were good. They always are.
When you yell and hit, even occasionally, you're pushing them away. They won't tell you anything. They'll lie and the might even forge you're signature. There might be a close relationship but it won't be that close because they will always be afraid of being yelled at or hit.
The first comment about the father pretty much sums up my own father. I know what that person went trough. Everything is just the same.
It's always made me wonder why they don't teach parenting in grade school and high school. Older folks might think it's too soon but if not then, when?
this is really sad and thats the thing ,its true, i have the same experience. My mother always yells at me for even the littlest things that i did wrong like forgetting about something and so we would argue for days in the end and often she would ask me to stop crying and you shouldn't besides its your fault, so yeah im trying to stop and yeah its true. so to all the parents out there. don't start to tell your child just to stop crying eventhough you yelled at them, its not just their fault its kind of you too since you were the one who yelled at them meaning that you were also the one who made them cry. trust me you do not want to tell them to stop doing so, im pretty much just going down that path right now and now i have issues trying to express my emotions because of it
Sorry, but where I come from "to yell at" is just another way to say "to reprimand". There's no detail to this woman's post, it could easily be that she's asking how to get to a point where her daughter doesn't cry every time she tells her she's done something wrong, or asks her to do something..
I wonder why people are willing to keep toxic people in their life. If I'm in that position I'd be kicking them out of my life already.
Stupidly vague question receives answer that is extremely precise and narrowly focused on responders own issues. Without her detailing what it is that she is yelling at her daughter for it's impossible to answer in any meaningful way, is the kid skipping school to smoke Meth with her 30 year old boyfriend or is it something stupid like not setting the table properly, how do you answer this?
While I wholeheartedly agree with your statement (wanting advice with too little information), yelling at a 16-year-old is never the solution regardless of the "crime". Take it from a household of yellers, once that starts it just locks up any progress toward a solution. A yell might work when a toddler is about to run into a street (or other such danger) but it will never "teach" a child old enough reason and discuss.
Load More Replies... I don't know if i should even be here, or anyone would see this... But hi! Im 14 yrs and my mom keeps on yelling and hitting me, blaming everything i do. literally for sleeping to accidentally slamming the door. i've lost count of how many times i've almost cried my eyes out till it got hard to breath and lost count of how many bruises she inflicted upon me. She says the absolute most idiotic things i've ever heard! she always says thats its fro my on good, that i'm too young or too old to be this or that or to act the way i do.. Most of the times she yells at me and hit me, i cant help but feel like maybe its all my fault? maybe i should just give in and follow everything she says? It hurts like hell when i try to keep all my emotions in, and its even harder to be happy and smile for once in my abusive life. First she says i'm too young to do what i want in life and then she says that i'm too old to be dramatic. i just don't know how much longer i can take all this...
My first impression is that the mother does a lot of yelling at her daughter, A LOT. She doesn't like her daughters response of crying every time and wants the crying to stop. It's hard to give advice based on the very small tidbit we've been offered. My gut feeling is that the mother is yelling too much, and what needs to change is the mothers yelling. If she wants a different reaction from her daughter than crying, but expects the crying to stop continuing her yelling pattern is madness really. She knows the reaction that yelling brings, therefore she needs to change how she approaches the situation of her daughters bad behavior.
What about not yelling at her at all? Seriously, take a deep breath and remember being that age, think before you say anything and even if you are fuming, try and be calm, yelling is so pointless for you and her. This will be all she remembers when she's older - my mom yelling at me for making mistakes - this is how we learn, and we can make them when we are younger, we are entitled to! Try to be more patient, difficult I know, but it will pay off when she is older and save your relationship.
I replied to this question on Quora, so I'm not going to repeat it here.
I stopped answering the phone, when mom called. She spent the next seventeen years sending me notes about how horribly I was treating her, but she never uttered one word of apology for the things she did to me. Finally, she died. Good riddance.
Both my parents were yellers and beaters. My dad beat me nearly to death when I was 6 years old. I'm 67 old now. They both died 3 weeks apart, 25 years ago. I never shed a tear for them nor have I ever missed them. In fact, I was cracking jokes during their funeral masses!
Good point, but bear in mind that not all children react the same. For example, my mother used to yell a hell of a lot when I was a teenager. Both to me and my brothers and sisters. Some took it hard, never fully recovering. Other got over it and learnt how to deal with it. I am part of the latter group. Why? I have absolutely no clue...
The sad thing is this is how I have become with my father. He was impatient, and never took interest or cared about me when I was younger, never involved me in anything he did, while he taught my brother how to drive I may as well have been invisible. And for years I just wanted him to be involved, to actually care about anything I did or ask about my interests. But now, I don't care what he thinks, he tries to say things to me but it's too late, I don't care, nothing will make it better because there's no bond there, I may as well just be living with a roommate I don't particularly get along with, I just try and avoid him now, I don't seek his opinion, and I don't tell him anything of my personal life, it's too little too late.
So the mother should pat the girl on the head when she does wrong?,this is the reason children have no moral in the west
No, but yelling certainly isn't the answer. The two can have a civilized discussion.
Load More Replies... I do too hate it when people yell at me and does nor motivate me but makes me just turn my back on it. BUT!!! we indeed do not know what the child has done, in what situation the parent is and I also know that in some situations I should have not just been yelled at but be slapped af for the things I used To do To p**s off my parents and show them my "independence" and now I am glad for those situations when they were pushed To the edge by my stupidity, so now I know where some limits are. How do WE outsiders know if This child is not simply "emotionally abusing" her MOM, by always showing herself as "weak". There are people who are This manipulative even when they grow up!
If she's doing some simple things like not cleaning her room or something theres no reason to yell...If thats the case the mom doesn't deserve a kid.
Maybe I am being harsh - but at 16 this is not a good reaction and she needs to toughen up. She is only a couple of years from the real world of college and/or work. Bursting into tears every time your boss chews you out for screwing up will not get you far. It really needs to be adressed right now.
The kid needs to toughen up implies that she's the problem. Maybe she is, we can't know for sure. The root cause is the yelling. Address the yelling and you take away the reason for the crying. If mom isn't yelling, then this teenager cannot fall on that crutch of crying. Because that's what the crying has become - a crutch. Then you have a young adult who cannot handle any sort of criticism because she's been conditioned to equate all criticism with yelling. It's a vicious cycle and the mom is aware enough to want to address and fix it.
Load More Replies... Depends on the reason for shouting. I mean, if the girl was yelled at for doing some stupid s**t she knew not to do for valid reasons, she's got it coming. She gets yelled at because she forgot to do the dishes one time, then shouting at her till she cries is too harsh. Same opinion as EasyCheeze1978.
I nice thing about having critical parents is you learn to deal with criticism, hopefully in a constructive way.
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