When it comes to the worst baby names in the world — we have to go to the internet to find them. After all, it is where all parents meet to discuss their cruel mistakes. However, don’t rush to judge these bad baby names. The intentions behind them were wholesome (in most cases), only they splashed straight down to the ground soon after.
Take Ohnasti, for example. It sounds exotic, but most importantly — it’s unique! It’s hard to find a person with such a name. You need to listen closely to find the problem with it. The name sounds like, “oh nasty.” While it might be one of the worst names to name your child, the fun does not stop here!
Today, we have the power of the internet to help us find these unfortunate (horrible) names. Luckily, people decided to share their terrible baby names on Reddit. Frasepalm asked an interesting question — “What baby name immediately makes you lose all respect for the parents and why?”
However, don’t rush to read the worst baby names just yet! Learn the reasoning behind some of the horrible names and what problems parents (and children) encounter.
What is a “Name Regret”?
You might not know it, but Name Regret is a serious thing. However, if the name you choose does not fall in the “terrible and life-ruining” zone — you’re safe from it. Name Regret affects parents who think they picked the wrong name for their baby. The best cure for it? Time or another name for their baby.
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Ohnasti
Supposedly pronounced “Honesty” but all I’ll ever see is “Oh Nasty!”
Back when I worked with children, I met a young lass named Younique. I felt sorry for her. She was only 4-5 at the time, and the moment she entered school, she began to hate it because the other children thought that it was silly and wouldn’t play with her. Eventually, the dad of another child said that it was a bad name *to her face.* Seriously. Don’t do things like this to your children. They aren’t pets. They’ll have to deal with the repercussions of your bad naming choices.
Once got beat up by a pair of identical twins cause they didn't like my name
So my Wife was giving birth to our first Son and the midwife asked if we’d chosen a name yet. We said yes and told her ‘Seth’. She replied “Oh thank goodness, a normal name! The last woman in here named her child Precious Bunny!”
One time when I was working at a motel, I took a reservation over the phone from a woman for her daughter:
Woman: Her name is Sri Lanka, S R I space L A N K A...
Me: Oh, you mean like the country!
Woman: Whaddaya mean, country?!?
Not so much a specific name, but gross butcherings of names. Ie. Kaightlynne instead of Caitlyn.
One little girl got her name legally changed in court, because her parents named her Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii.
I used to write on cakes, the worst name I ever saw was "Tuba Poo". I asked if it was a nickname, it was not. It's been like 6 years and it still haunts me. Her mother's name was Natalie, why Natalie? Why?
Any name based on a popular TV series or movie. Like, if I see your daughter is named Khaleesi, I think significantly less of you as a person.
People that name their kids things like that are generally chavs/bogans/whatever the American equivalent is of those two words.
I had a set of twins (I'm a teacher) a couple years ago named Heaven and Nevaeh.
I had four kids named Shaun in one class, all spelled differently, none spelled Shaun or Sean.
I had a girl named Jezebel and boys named Jesus and Messiah in one class. (Nothing really wrong with those names, but having all three in one class was odd.) I also had a kid named Ted that year. Not Theodore or Edward, just Ted. I saw his birth certificate, just Ted.
This year, one of the other teachers has a boy named M'Lord. I'm not even making that.
What's getting my goat this year is the random apostrophes. Your child's name is Elayna, a lovely name, IMO, but E'lay'na is ridiculous. I have three girls with random apostrophes in their names, its annoying.
I had a teacher in grade 1/2 whose last name was Dyck (sounds like d**k). Fortunately at that age I didn't think anything of it. Apparently her parents didn't think anything of it either...
Her parents named her Rhoda. Rhoda Dyck. I have to assume they were sadistic assholes.
Just changed all of my plans for today so I can re-watch every episode of Letterkenny lol
How Do You Choose a Baby Name You Won’t Regret?
If you want to do something right — take as much time as you need. The best name doesn’t come in an instant. When avoiding the worst names for a child — you might want to have a few “guidelines” to help you. Make sure to avoid:
- Names that don’t make sense.
- Names you are pressured to use (or the opposite — pressured not to use by professionals).
- Names that are easily misspelled.
- Names that just don’t suit your baby.
Sometimes, even following these rules, mistakes are made (on purpose or accidentally). So, think with hindsight in mind.
My cousin named her son named Lincoln, which isn't bad by itself.
At least until she had her daughter, Kennedy. She said she plans on naming her next kid Garfield.
She literally names her kids after the last names of *assassinated presidents.*
Kash. It isn't the worst name in the world but the fact his second name was 'Ransom', made it a whole lot worse.
Kash Ransom.
I was on a little league baseball team with these two brothers named Doer and Achiever.
Talk about pressure to perform, those parents had expectations.
Achiever sounds like someone sneezing if said quickly, which is bad enough, but Doer? That just seems lazy, like they thought of achiever then couldn't come up with anything else.
A co-worker has a friend who named her daughters Vengeance and Violence.
Are they twins? Are they identical? Do they wear blue dresses? Do they live in a hotel?
A few years ago there was a guy in my area in the news. His first name was Justice. He's doing 100 years for stabbing 3 people.
Chicago, North, True. Just to name a few. I’m no Kardashian hater, but I really can’t stand the names they give their kids.
Chicago is ok-ish only because growing up I had a friend named California we all called her Cali for short. But North and True is strange...and Apple.
Strap in and prepare for rough seas!
My mom is a midwife and one day she came home with what she thought was the epitome of dumb names.
These parents had just gotten back from a trip to the states, where they had visited a dock to look at boats, and one of those beautiful boats had an even more beautiful and exotic name, they wanted to name their baby daughter after this boat.
Usnavy
My mom is a saint for not laughing.
I mean it could be true but it's a little ripped from musical theatre: "Usnavi de la Vega is the central protagonist of In the Heights. Originally from the Dominican Republic, he arrived in Washington Heights with his parents when he was very young. His name is based on the boat they saw when they came in (US NAVY)."
I have a nephew named Anfernee, and I know how mad he gets when I call him Anthony. Almost as mad as I get when I think about the fact that my sister named him Anfernee.
Someone I know is a nurse in the ER so they've delivered quite a few babies. But one day they said that one set of parents decided to name their kid Ssss. You pronounce Ssss, Forest.
Are There Banned Baby Names?
No one is safe from the ban hammer, names especially. Some countries decided to take the extra step to ban a couple of names. For example:
- Nutella (the name) is banned in France. However, it is not because of any copyright laws. The judge ruled that such a name should be given to a child. Instead, the judge ruled to name the child Ella.
- IKEA is banned in Sweden. You can’t disrespect the most important store in the country.
- . (just a dot, nothing more) is banned in New Zealand. The laws prohibit the use of these kinds of symbols in the name.
- Tom is not allowed in Portugal. However, you can call your child Tomás instead (a better choice in hindsight). In Portugal, Tom is considered a nickname. The laws in Portugal prohibit the use of nicknames as official names.
- @ (like the Gmail) is banned in China. The reason is that it’s pronounced ai-ta, which sounds very similar to the phrase “love him.”
Nevaeh, although I think that has more to do with the fact that every parent I know who has named their baby this is a teenager who thinks they’re “soooo cool” for dropping out of school in 9th grade, who are about as deep as a puddle but think they’re Aristotle or Shakespeare because “it’s heaven spelled backwards since she’s my angel”
Naming your child Bear makes me think you’re a huge twat. Mostly because I’ve met a few gorgeous children called Bear and everyone of the parents were huge twats.
Saw a fun name on the attendance sheet (so this is official) of one of my classes: Daddyboi
The overly matchy names to the point of ridiculousness. My top example is a set of brothers named Romance, Romantic, and Romeo.
Baby. As in the Dirty Dancing lead female. Because nobody in the professional world is going to want their name to be Baby.
I went to high school with a one "Crystal Shanda Lear."
This was back before dumb names were the rage. She would have been named that in, say, 81-82. Poor girl. I don't know that I lost respect for the parents so much as felt bad for her to be saddled with that s**t.
I hope she wasn't named after crystal meth and chasing the dragon. It's official, I'm a pessimist.
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oh my god my mother also told me about a "Crystal Shanda Leer" she went to school with. This is freaky
My name is Crystal and I was NAMED after a chandelier XD thankfully my parents stopped at Crystal…
Load More Replies... My name is Crystal. I’m named after a chandelier (not joking… I’m adopted and parents did not have a name prepared, lol) Thankfully they stopped at the “crystal” part… but I STILL got teased for my name as a kid in the 80s. “Crystal” was apparently an odd name then XD
There was Crystal Tips and Alistair from the 70s!! So it doesn't seem that odd to me. I have always liked it. Alistair was a dog... It was a cartoon btw!! 😃
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Oof. My mom has a similar story, from a similar time: a coworker of hers had “England” for her surname… so when Ms. England had a child, obviously the only right thing to do was to name the poor little girl “London”! London England is about eight years older than I am. I sometimes wonder where she is, and whether she’s changed her name.
Maybe they were an Only Fools and Horses fan. That was new in the early 80's.
Only if she has a brother called "Rodney You Plonker". ;-)
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It took me like a full minute to realize it sounded like “Crystal Chandelier.” And there’s a helpful picture and everything. I’m so oblivious.
Was this Chanda Lear from the jet family? They actually named their daughter Chanda....
I went to elementary school with Crystal Ball and Candy Kane. This was in the '70s.
I went to high school with a girl named Sparka Hall. Her Mom was Sunshine & her Dad was Moonflower, so I guess she got off lucky.
My daughter grew up with three girls from 2 families: Diamond & Star, and Liber-T
My little sister is Chrystal claire, but my aumt really tried to get parents to go with Chrystal clear
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/?title=Shanda_Lear&redirect=no
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Totally possible my daughter went to elementary school with her, because I'm hoping there's only one
My cousin Crystal has gone by Kat all her adult life, lol I also have a friend named Bambi and she's the most non-Bambi stereotype ever, lol. She ended up working for Disney Channel and understandably started going by her middle name Leigh
When my mother was student teaching in the early '70s, she had a student named Kandy Kane.
You just know they called her “Shanda Lear” because they couldn’t spell chandelier.
Could be Lear is her surname - comes from Leicester in England after Leir, a local water god.
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I heard of Crystal Shanda Lear back about 1950 but no mention of time travel.
I have a cousin who named his daughter Crystal that’s ok in itself except their last name is Cleer, And to top it of she married a guy with the surname Waters and hyphenated her surname she literally became Crystal Cleer -Waters. I have no words.
Isn’t this the name of the stripper from the batchelor party in Friends.
The first and middle name of a German guy I know sounds like the German word for parsley. It was an accident but how could the parents not have realised it when saying it out loud?
In the nick of time, I managed to stop a neighbour's son from naming her grandaughter "Crystal Ball". At no point had my neighbour, her son or his partner realised Crystal, whilst a nice enough name, does not work well with the surname Ball. Thank goodness they ran it by a teacher first! The kid has a different first name, and Crystal as one of their middle names.
Any form of Aiden (Aidin, Ayden, Aidyn, Ayeden) and/or Ashley (Ashlee, Ashleigh, Ashlie, Ashli, Ash-Lee).
I am a teacher and have had students with all those variations. I actually had 3 Aidens and 4 Ashleys (none of which were spelled normally) in a class of 23 students.
Like come on parents, you aren't being original by making your kid's name ridiculous to spell.
I lose respect for parents who give their kids first names that when added to their given last names become horrible. The parents don't even care that their kid has to live with it. Two real examples I've come across are Richard Sieman (The guy's name is D**k Semen, for f***s sake.) And even worse, Desire Cox.
I normally agree, but every now and then you come across one that is actually kind of cool, in a "You could be famous with a name like that" way. Three examples I have known, all of whom were born between 1900 and 1920 were, Joy Devine and the brother and sister Treble and Tenor Bell. Edit: Also, look at my name, remove the later addition of "Hudson" and then sing "Puff the Magic Dragon". Just the first couple of lines.
I knew three sisters names -Autumn-Breeze, Summer-Skye and April-Rain.
Bonus addition one of them had a kid and named it Gidget.
Edit for those wondering: This is in Eastern Canada.
What Names Are Losing Popularity?
Some names lose their popularity slowly, fading away into obscurity or, in some cases, becoming the bane of society overall. The best example of the ladder — Karen. The name was popular in the past and given to almost every girl. However, when baby boomers grew up, the internet together decided to make them the bud of jokes (ruining a whole haircut, too).
In the end, the internet won. Karen lost popularity and became the subject of multiple jokes. However, it’s not the only name to lose popularity. The reason behind the popularity loss varies between the names. However, the memes on the internet quicken the downfall of a name.
I’ve taught:
- Precious
- Princess
- Righteousness
- Blessing
- Pious
- Destiny
*edit* forgot Sincere
I’ve taught an Annikin (yep, right after the prequel came out) Merlin, Wrigley (girl) Emmahleigh, and Aspen Forest.
I had a chemistry teacher who was an avid runner. He proudly told us his three children were named Miles, Lane, and Chase. How narcissistic do you have to be to name your children after your hobby?
I was once checking in a customer for service.
EmoChanel
And she was very proud of it.
You know the Duggar family (19 Kids and Counting)? One of their daughters named their son Spurgeon. SPURGEON.
Names with uneccessary letters or the rarely-seen, lack of necessary letters:
Jaiymes
Jaxn
Khaydence
Aayden
How Companies Impact the Naming Process?
Marketing is a powerful tool. If done correctly, people will buy your products. However, if you are a true marketing master (Don Draper-like) — people will name their children after your company and products. However, those names will quickly land on the list of the worst baby names ever.
Cool-named brands already have some babies named after them. For example, the leading car brands (Audi, Benz, Ford, and Kia) inspired parents to name their children. In 1987, for example, 182 girls were named after Porsche. However, there is no real reason to use brand names.
However, some companies decide to sweeten the deal. Several companies directly encourage parents to use brand names for their babies. Their offer? Free products (or a discount) for a lifetime. Subway, for example, announced they would give free sandwiches to people named like the company. In 96 hours, ten thousand people changed their names.
I once worked for Build-a-Bear Workshop. In one of their new hire training videos there was an employee taking to the camera about who the f**k knows because all I could focus on was her name tag. It said "Om'unique". Like, I'm Unique, except worse. I still have no idea what she was taking about.
I met the adult child of parents who named their daughter Morticia Addams, after the TV Show. I made her show me her driver's license and there was the proof. Her own parents had a different last name.
Prancer and Vixen for babies born during the Christmas season.
MyLuv (yes, I have met a kid named this). That poor kid is probably not going to be successful, unless they change their name later on.
Note: this post originally had 77 images. It’s been shortened to the top 40 images based on user votes.
In am so happy about the regulation of names in Germany. They have to be gender specific and have to be normal enough that the kid don't have to suffer.
It's good that only normal names are allowed. The gender specific part I am not too sure about. Fr example, I know a person who was born with male and female genitals and was named Robin. Because that way they could sort out later if male or female. Robin decided not to choose and the name still fits.
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I worked with a woman who's first name was Jenatul. Yes, it's pronounced exactly as you think it is. No, she didn't go by Jen. Used that full name and was proud of it.
"Dokhtar bas" was a common name in my country and still is in some less developed areas. If I want to translate it in english it says, "enough daughters". Just imagine your name shows that you are not wanted just because of your gender.
American problem, in Europe there are laws to protect thce children.... my italian Grandmother wanted to name her son "Gianni" but this name was not allowed in 1941, so he was christened "Giovanni", but nobody ever called him so
Meh, kids can end up with stupid names in Europe too. I know a kid whose name is Momchiliyan, as opposed to the traditional Momchil. It sounds stupid as hell, but it's not forbidden since it's not offensive. It's become a trend in my country for parents to come up with "unique" twists on normal names, which always sound really dumb, lest their kid end up with a common (aka decent) name.
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I went to college with Sweetheart. She was Asian American, but I didn’t know her well enough to know if English language learning played a role in her parents’ name choice.
Load More Replies... My aunt (whose last name is Wood) named her daughter Petra. This is a great name, had her middle name not been Fied. Petra Fied Wood.
In The Netherlands occasionally someone names their son 'Ad'. If the kid was born after WWII this has either meant the parents are nazi sympathizers who named their kid in honor of Adolf H. or the parents are ignorant fools. I don't advice naming your son 'Aad' or 'Dolf' either. No, I don't care that was you grandfathers name, just don't. In middel school I had Adje proclaim some very peculiar views in history class. No one in our village was talking to the parents after that. 🙄
Yes, that's what bugged me as a teacher with kids named after Nordic/Germanic god's, at least here in rural Eastern Germany: Every parent who named their kid (born ca.1993-2007) "Loki/Thor/Freya/Odin" was/is definitely one of openly neo nazi racist "völkisch" scumbags. Sorry not sorry for being judgemental, we had like up to 20% of right wing voters in some villages here. This was looooong before those "Thor"-movies. Its different now because of the influence of those movies, or if e.g. a Norwegian parent chose those names.
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There are naming laws in Australia that say that you cannot name a child anything that is going to cause distress. I would like to believe that they are taking into account the distress of the child, as well as anyone that will need to interact with the child over their lifetime.
There was a girl in my 10th grade French class named “Baby”. I felt so sorry for her. She was only in that school for a few weeks or a month. I’m sorry, but I can’t take anyone named Baby seriously. Also, my sisters mother in law was a social worker. The number of kids called La-a (Ladasha) was astounding
Nobody with the name La-a has ever been registered. This is a racist trope that has been circulating for years.
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Nobody with the name La-a has ever been registered. This is a racist trope that has been circulating for years.
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I worked in an inner city charity hospital in the 70s. At one time they had put neck beads on babies saying "Male" or "Female" and the last name of the mother. In the patient records for the hospital, you sometimes came across older children named Male or Female (pronounced "Mah-lay" or "Fem-allay".
3 facts. 1.This guarantees the future careers of many therapists. 2. Many of these children will change their names not just because THEY REALLY dislike their names and, they know their careers will curtailed, but because of all the misery/torment they have experienced because of teasing. because of that name. 3. For a number of reasons, many of these kids will act out and P;articipate" in the juvenile justice system.
I met a boy named Nixon. It took an incredible amount of self-control to avoid asking why. Maybe it's been long enough, but still...
This problem goes way back. My dad (born 1909) had a school friend whose parents, Mr & Mrs Butts, named their daughter Ophelia. My dad still laughed about it 70-something years later.
I work with a man whose name is "Random Frie" (pronounced 'fry'). Just... why?
I worked at a band store in high school. In spring and summer, we'd have reps go to schools all over to sign parents up for our rent-to-own instrument program. Another Lady & I would take the names, find an instrument for the kid, and tag it w/the appropriate name & school. We had some doozies. A girl whose last name was Halloween, & lived on Spooky Hollow Dr. Another girl - I can't remember how they spelled it - but sounded out was "Glorious God Hallelujah." A million different ways to spell Hayley, McKenzie, Kayley, etc. Sometimes so weird that it had to be spelled out letter by letter to get it right when writing the tag.
I have a very normal name. In fact, it's the name of a wine. However, my wonderful Mom (Cathy, not Kathy or Katherine...just Cathy) decided to spell it differently. How many people on this planet would automatically know to spell my name S-H-E-R-I and not S-H-E-R-R-Y??
You can be original without having to name your child with some weird, misspelled or unappropriated name. You can research in books or online for names that maybe aren't used so much anymore, that belongs to literature or whatever and find something that is not so common like John, but even not so idiotic like some that I found in this post
I used to work in medical records at a hospital in the late 90s. Saw the name Timber Ree for a newborn. I joked for years about that name and how I can imagine her getting called into the house "Timberrrrrrrrrrrr." FF 20ish years and on the front page of the paper was an article where she'd been shot breaking and entering a guy's house on a drug deal gone wrong.
So many of the names here would have been fine if they were just Nicknames. Name your kid something normal and then just call them "Prancer" or "Apple" or whatever.
I think Iceland goes a bit too far in regulating names, but it's easy to understand why after reading this list. My parents (born in 44) :went to school with Merry Christmas, and the brothers Bean. First names? Green and Pressed.
My friend's daughter has a bf named Blade. I feel like he had a rat tail haircut 20 years ago.
i worked in a legal field that required that i see birth certificates of client's children. i have seen sisters remember remember for one and the other was the same thing repeated as well but i don't remember. the interesting one was the guy who called all his daughters his 'jewel of life': ruby, pearl, diamond, emerald, and sardonyx.
I have a friend who's 5yr old son is call Orion, (which I think is cute and really suits him but a lot of people don't like.) My old neighbour had twin boys called Thor and Odin, her best friend had 2 daughters called ophelia and pandora. My half-sister has a 2yr old son named Ragnarok, she's pregnant with baby no2 right now and everyone is constantly joking about what she'll name this one. (She's a massive poser and attention seeker who wants to be seen as a 'rock chick' despite being anything but)
I visited schools for my job, and one time whilst in reception a kid was late and had to be buzzed through, 'on you go simian' for those that don't know, simian is another name for monkey. This is is SE london, make of that what you will
Elon Musk has two children named Exa Dark Sideræl and X AE A-XII.... the last one was supposed to have a funky 'AE' combo letter and a -12 at the end but California made them alter it..... nice to know there are SOME limits to what you named your kids🤦🏻♀️.....
I worked at a summer camp Witha woman named Isis (this was before 9-11). My favorit that I heard was Sierra Mist after the soda came out. The last one might be a joke but i did hear "Candy Sprinkles would you please meet your party at the front Gate" This was at a state fair if it is a real name fell bad for this person if it was a joke page then it was a good one.
Isis was an ancient Egyptian goddess.... my brother named my niece Jazmin Sierra (Jasmin the Disney princess and Sierra after Sierra Mist)
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I admit I changed the "C" in my kid's name to a "K" because I honestly think the letter "C" looks funny
I was a former lunch lady. I had kids named Bella, Edward, Jacob and Seth all in one kindergarten class. I also had identical twins Sunshyne and Rayne. I also had another set of twin girls named Chrysanthemun and Daisy who were completely into the whole Goth style.
There's a comedian who does a funny bit about losing one of her in-laws named Coen (pronounced c**n) and having to call his name as quietly as possible in a store.
Naming conventions are different from culture to culture and change over time. Could we maybe just let people do their thing?
Didn't we honestly have a listicle like this a little less than a month ago?
Last I heard Dweezil was still using this name. My sister went out with him a few times. Moon-Unit just changed to Moon.
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Worked with a young man named "Vin-el," pronounced as the fabric (vinyl) "because mama and daddy done did it on the vinyl seat of a McDonald's booth, and that's when I was made." Worked with a young woman whose mother named her "D'Juana," pronounced as "Didju wanna?" as in let's have sex. She was conceived in that particular instance, hence the "brilliant" name. She hated it intensely, and went solely by DJ. Knew of twins named "Lemonjello" and "Orangejello," but pronounced each as one word---lemonjello, orangejello---"because Mama likes that sweet slop that jiggles." The people, from widely different areas of my home state, are all of the same ethnicity. Just seems to be a trend.....All of them are now in their late 50s, early 60s, but don't know how the names affected their lives. Does make me wonder if they also named their kids horrid names.
I am a 4th generation Elizabeth, but also being part Native American, my middle name is Woniyah-wah (whoa-knee-ya-wah) and means "spirit of the snow".. I was born during a particularly bad snow storm in Atlanta GA. Getting even a little snow here is unusual. The fact that there was enough to accumulate and pretty much shut down the city was significant. I - =HATED=- it growing up! I thought my hippie parents were outta their minds for naming me something so hard to pronounce. But once I got older, and my Native heritage became a large part of my identity, I am quite proud of it!
Worked IT in a hospital system. Most calls had me at users' offices and desks to fix something. Most users chat me up while i'm fixing whatever. Had a call take me to the lead daytime RN's office of the natal ward, and she chatted just like most others. I chatted along as she seemed cool, and conversation naturally wandered because I had a fairly long procedure to carry out, and her time wasn't pressed during my visit. She ended up telling me of a mother from a very poor part of the area in hospital to give birth to her baby girl. Apparently, it required many of the hospital staff to convince the woman that 'Vagina'(pronounced as 'Regina') would not be a comfortable name on many levels, having to define and explain that the 'name' was in fact the anatomical word to identify a woman's genitals. That was the day I learned that hospital and medical workers, in general, are amazingly cool and normal people in spite of their harrowing profession.
Honestly this just intensely motivates me to give my future good decent names
Nobody with the name La-a has ever been registered. This is a racist trope that has been circulating for years.
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Around the time naming your child after the place they were conceived became fashionable, I came across a child with the middle name "Layby". I don't know if the term is used in other countries, but in the UK, a layby (or lay-by) is a stopping place for vehicles at the side of a road.
I once bought a bright pink iMac G3 at a thrift shop. Found it had loads of personal work related stuff on it (I won't go into what it was because it may be a bit too easy to trace her down). Took me some time to figure out the woman who used to own it was ACTUALLY called Barbie. I sent her an e-mail and she came over very friendly and intelligent, the computer suggested she had a well-paid job so all is well in the end. She told me her work actually accidentally got rid of her personal computer and that she was happy for me to keep it, if I could be so kind do remove the personal data (she had backups of everything important already). So I did. Seriously though. Barbie. And a pink iMac. 2021_NYR_2...5-jpeg.jpg 
Worst student name I've ever seen: "Nigah Brown". It was Mr. Brown for the entire school year. Seriously, how could you?!
An Associated Press report I saw June 9 says parents in Norway are picking names from the Ikea catalogue. Perfectly OK,, so Long as they're careful;. for example, the name Huvudroll certainly falls trippingly from the tongue--but it means meatballs.
Sure, why not give other kids another reason to make fun of their children.
19th Cy religious parents often used names like Faith, Hope, Charity, Prudence, Patience, and sometimes used names of Bible personages. In 20th Cy USA some black parents, possibly seeking name that would confer automatic respect, sometimes used military ranks. I have personally run across Lieutenant and Commodore. In Revolutionary Russia, some zealous Leninist parents named their children for some of the goals and/or accomplishments of the workers' Paradise. Radio and rural Electrification are among those I've found.
Remember sitcom How i met your mother? There was that canadian woman, Robin
Aaaand... What about people named D**k C**k? There is one Rock group, Blackbriar, and their singer is Zora C**k. Where i live,zora means twillight 😁
How about names based on food? I once saw a person on a reality TV show called Lasagna. She had no idea her name was dinner.
There are conditions though. I had a friend, Galina, which is a lovely name in Russia, but means chicken in my language. The nickname Kaka, in Brazil, means poop in other countries. Sometimes names just don't travel well. Siri, means penis in Georgian, and Finland has a chips brand called Megapussi, which i think means big bag, or something like that
My name is Sky Heighway, male 45 years old. So I can relate, big time. I changed my first name for a few years at 12 years old. My middle name is Jarrah. It's a tree used for train sleepers and boat building. Trains planes boats and automobiles. I should have gone into a career in travel. I have met many people with strange and funny names and I can confirm it usually mean your parents were or are selfish idiots. I met a guy named Rock Stone. Laughed at him (he was a lot bigger than me). He got angry until I introduced myself (we were in a professional setting were I don't normally introduce myself). I met a 4yr old boy named Lucifer. He was trouble, but that was obvious at that point because his parents were doing a terrible job. The best thing you can do to help is openly mock anyone who tells you they are thinking about giving their kids a name like this. Or recommend to someone thinking about it to do the internet test. Or at the very least give them a back up name as well
If I see a family (looking at you America) where the grandfather is named James George Adams (for example). Then his son is called James George Adams ll; then his son is called James George Adams lll, ad nauseum. This is pure laziness. Can't be bothered to think of a name. I can understand following a tradition of a middle name through the ages, but this is not a good thing. During the time when two or more generations are living at the same address, how do they know who the letters are for? I once knew a father and son who had the same names, which was bad enough, but they also had the same birthday. It caused all sorts of difficulties.
Came across a 5 year old girl crying that her class mates kept calling her pepper pig. Her name was pepper
I saw a Name which is perfect for porn (in Germany and English speaking countries): Valentina Lust I'm still laughing.
It's really good I'm not planning on having kids ever. I'm particularly fond of Basil as a name.
I met a boy named Nixon. It took me an incredible amount of self-control to not ask why.
I at times regret naming my child Spirit Love. Then I go to her school and in her class theirs a boy named N***r (after the river in Africa) a girl Shithead pronounced shy-ead. Not to mention all the ones that they just threw letters together
I know a lady called Juliedde (after grandparents Julia and Eddie). Doesn't sound too bad but NO ONE gets it first time, obviously everyone defaults to "Juliette" and she has to spell the name, and tell the story about the grandparents, every bloody time
You win, BP. I give. I shall henceforth not return to your shores to suffer your inane b******t.
Again - an US problem, that does not exist in another civilized nations. We have laws that forbid name kids as an object [for example Apple] or a trademark [like Sony] or anything that is belittling, a slur or anyhow may harm the kid ]almost all the above in this article] and yes, this is great. It is not about your freedom as a parent, it is about the kid's wellbeing. If you cannot deal with not being "original" when naming kid - you are mentally a kid yourself and should not procreate at all.
In am so happy about the regulation of names in Germany. They have to be gender specific and have to be normal enough that the kid don't have to suffer.
It's good that only normal names are allowed. The gender specific part I am not too sure about. Fr example, I know a person who was born with male and female genitals and was named Robin. Because that way they could sort out later if male or female. Robin decided not to choose and the name still fits.
Load More Replies... I worked with a woman who's first name was Jenatul. Yes, it's pronounced exactly as you think it is. No, she didn't go by Jen. Used that full name and was proud of it.
"Dokhtar bas" was a common name in my country and still is in some less developed areas. If I want to translate it in english it says, "enough daughters". Just imagine your name shows that you are not wanted just because of your gender.
American problem, in Europe there are laws to protect thce children.... my italian Grandmother wanted to name her son "Gianni" but this name was not allowed in 1941, so he was christened "Giovanni", but nobody ever called him so
Meh, kids can end up with stupid names in Europe too. I know a kid whose name is Momchiliyan, as opposed to the traditional Momchil. It sounds stupid as hell, but it's not forbidden since it's not offensive. It's become a trend in my country for parents to come up with "unique" twists on normal names, which always sound really dumb, lest their kid end up with a common (aka decent) name.
Load More Replies... I went to college with Sweetheart. She was Asian American, but I didn’t know her well enough to know if English language learning played a role in her parents’ name choice.
Load More Replies... My aunt (whose last name is Wood) named her daughter Petra. This is a great name, had her middle name not been Fied. Petra Fied Wood.
In The Netherlands occasionally someone names their son 'Ad'. If the kid was born after WWII this has either meant the parents are nazi sympathizers who named their kid in honor of Adolf H. or the parents are ignorant fools. I don't advice naming your son 'Aad' or 'Dolf' either. No, I don't care that was you grandfathers name, just don't. In middel school I had Adje proclaim some very peculiar views in history class. No one in our village was talking to the parents after that. 🙄
Yes, that's what bugged me as a teacher with kids named after Nordic/Germanic god's, at least here in rural Eastern Germany: Every parent who named their kid (born ca.1993-2007) "Loki/Thor/Freya/Odin" was/is definitely one of openly neo nazi racist "völkisch" scumbags. Sorry not sorry for being judgemental, we had like up to 20% of right wing voters in some villages here. This was looooong before those "Thor"-movies. Its different now because of the influence of those movies, or if e.g. a Norwegian parent chose those names.
Load More Replies... There are naming laws in Australia that say that you cannot name a child anything that is going to cause distress. I would like to believe that they are taking into account the distress of the child, as well as anyone that will need to interact with the child over their lifetime.
There was a girl in my 10th grade French class named “Baby”. I felt so sorry for her. She was only in that school for a few weeks or a month. I’m sorry, but I can’t take anyone named Baby seriously. Also, my sisters mother in law was a social worker. The number of kids called La-a (Ladasha) was astounding
Nobody with the name La-a has ever been registered. This is a racist trope that has been circulating for years.
Load More Replies... Nobody with the name La-a has ever been registered. This is a racist trope that has been circulating for years.
Load More Replies... I worked in an inner city charity hospital in the 70s. At one time they had put neck beads on babies saying "Male" or "Female" and the last name of the mother. In the patient records for the hospital, you sometimes came across older children named Male or Female (pronounced "Mah-lay" or "Fem-allay".
3 facts. 1.This guarantees the future careers of many therapists. 2. Many of these children will change their names not just because THEY REALLY dislike their names and, they know their careers will curtailed, but because of all the misery/torment they have experienced because of teasing. because of that name. 3. For a number of reasons, many of these kids will act out and P;articipate" in the juvenile justice system.
I met a boy named Nixon. It took an incredible amount of self-control to avoid asking why. Maybe it's been long enough, but still...
This problem goes way back. My dad (born 1909) had a school friend whose parents, Mr & Mrs Butts, named their daughter Ophelia. My dad still laughed about it 70-something years later.
I work with a man whose name is "Random Frie" (pronounced 'fry'). Just... why?
I worked at a band store in high school. In spring and summer, we'd have reps go to schools all over to sign parents up for our rent-to-own instrument program. Another Lady & I would take the names, find an instrument for the kid, and tag it w/the appropriate name & school. We had some doozies. A girl whose last name was Halloween, & lived on Spooky Hollow Dr. Another girl - I can't remember how they spelled it - but sounded out was "Glorious God Hallelujah." A million different ways to spell Hayley, McKenzie, Kayley, etc. Sometimes so weird that it had to be spelled out letter by letter to get it right when writing the tag.
I have a very normal name. In fact, it's the name of a wine. However, my wonderful Mom (Cathy, not Kathy or Katherine...just Cathy) decided to spell it differently. How many people on this planet would automatically know to spell my name S-H-E-R-I and not S-H-E-R-R-Y??
You can be original without having to name your child with some weird, misspelled or unappropriated name. You can research in books or online for names that maybe aren't used so much anymore, that belongs to literature or whatever and find something that is not so common like John, but even not so idiotic like some that I found in this post
I used to work in medical records at a hospital in the late 90s. Saw the name Timber Ree for a newborn. I joked for years about that name and how I can imagine her getting called into the house "Timberrrrrrrrrrrr." FF 20ish years and on the front page of the paper was an article where she'd been shot breaking and entering a guy's house on a drug deal gone wrong.
So many of the names here would have been fine if they were just Nicknames. Name your kid something normal and then just call them "Prancer" or "Apple" or whatever.
I think Iceland goes a bit too far in regulating names, but it's easy to understand why after reading this list. My parents (born in 44) :went to school with Merry Christmas, and the brothers Bean. First names? Green and Pressed.
My friend's daughter has a bf named Blade. I feel like he had a rat tail haircut 20 years ago.
i worked in a legal field that required that i see birth certificates of client's children. i have seen sisters remember remember for one and the other was the same thing repeated as well but i don't remember. the interesting one was the guy who called all his daughters his 'jewel of life': ruby, pearl, diamond, emerald, and sardonyx.
I have a friend who's 5yr old son is call Orion, (which I think is cute and really suits him but a lot of people don't like.) My old neighbour had twin boys called Thor and Odin, her best friend had 2 daughters called ophelia and pandora. My half-sister has a 2yr old son named Ragnarok, she's pregnant with baby no2 right now and everyone is constantly joking about what she'll name this one. (She's a massive poser and attention seeker who wants to be seen as a 'rock chick' despite being anything but)
I visited schools for my job, and one time whilst in reception a kid was late and had to be buzzed through, 'on you go simian' for those that don't know, simian is another name for monkey. This is is SE london, make of that what you will
Elon Musk has two children named Exa Dark Sideræl and X AE A-XII.... the last one was supposed to have a funky 'AE' combo letter and a -12 at the end but California made them alter it..... nice to know there are SOME limits to what you named your kids🤦🏻♀️.....
I worked at a summer camp Witha woman named Isis (this was before 9-11). My favorit that I heard was Sierra Mist after the soda came out. The last one might be a joke but i did hear "Candy Sprinkles would you please meet your party at the front Gate" This was at a state fair if it is a real name fell bad for this person if it was a joke page then it was a good one.
Isis was an ancient Egyptian goddess.... my brother named my niece Jazmin Sierra (Jasmin the Disney princess and Sierra after Sierra Mist)
Load More Replies... I admit I changed the "C" in my kid's name to a "K" because I honestly think the letter "C" looks funny
I was a former lunch lady. I had kids named Bella, Edward, Jacob and Seth all in one kindergarten class. I also had identical twins Sunshyne and Rayne. I also had another set of twin girls named Chrysanthemun and Daisy who were completely into the whole Goth style.
There's a comedian who does a funny bit about losing one of her in-laws named Coen (pronounced c**n) and having to call his name as quietly as possible in a store.
Naming conventions are different from culture to culture and change over time. Could we maybe just let people do their thing?
Didn't we honestly have a listicle like this a little less than a month ago?
Last I heard Dweezil was still using this name. My sister went out with him a few times. Moon-Unit just changed to Moon.
Load More Replies... Worked with a young man named "Vin-el," pronounced as the fabric (vinyl) "because mama and daddy done did it on the vinyl seat of a McDonald's booth, and that's when I was made." Worked with a young woman whose mother named her "D'Juana," pronounced as "Didju wanna?" as in let's have sex. She was conceived in that particular instance, hence the "brilliant" name. She hated it intensely, and went solely by DJ. Knew of twins named "Lemonjello" and "Orangejello," but pronounced each as one word---lemonjello, orangejello---"because Mama likes that sweet slop that jiggles." The people, from widely different areas of my home state, are all of the same ethnicity. Just seems to be a trend.....All of them are now in their late 50s, early 60s, but don't know how the names affected their lives. Does make me wonder if they also named their kids horrid names.
I am a 4th generation Elizabeth, but also being part Native American, my middle name is Woniyah-wah (whoa-knee-ya-wah) and means "spirit of the snow".. I was born during a particularly bad snow storm in Atlanta GA. Getting even a little snow here is unusual. The fact that there was enough to accumulate and pretty much shut down the city was significant. I - =HATED=- it growing up! I thought my hippie parents were outta their minds for naming me something so hard to pronounce. But once I got older, and my Native heritage became a large part of my identity, I am quite proud of it!
Worked IT in a hospital system. Most calls had me at users' offices and desks to fix something. Most users chat me up while i'm fixing whatever. Had a call take me to the lead daytime RN's office of the natal ward, and she chatted just like most others. I chatted along as she seemed cool, and conversation naturally wandered because I had a fairly long procedure to carry out, and her time wasn't pressed during my visit. She ended up telling me of a mother from a very poor part of the area in hospital to give birth to her baby girl. Apparently, it required many of the hospital staff to convince the woman that 'Vagina'(pronounced as 'Regina') would not be a comfortable name on many levels, having to define and explain that the 'name' was in fact the anatomical word to identify a woman's genitals. That was the day I learned that hospital and medical workers, in general, are amazingly cool and normal people in spite of their harrowing profession.
Honestly this just intensely motivates me to give my future good decent names
Nobody with the name La-a has ever been registered. This is a racist trope that has been circulating for years.
Load More Replies... Around the time naming your child after the place they were conceived became fashionable, I came across a child with the middle name "Layby". I don't know if the term is used in other countries, but in the UK, a layby (or lay-by) is a stopping place for vehicles at the side of a road.
I once bought a bright pink iMac G3 at a thrift shop. Found it had loads of personal work related stuff on it (I won't go into what it was because it may be a bit too easy to trace her down). Took me some time to figure out the woman who used to own it was ACTUALLY called Barbie. I sent her an e-mail and she came over very friendly and intelligent, the computer suggested she had a well-paid job so all is well in the end. She told me her work actually accidentally got rid of her personal computer and that she was happy for me to keep it, if I could be so kind do remove the personal data (she had backups of everything important already). So I did. Seriously though. Barbie. And a pink iMac. 2021_NYR_2...5-jpeg.jpg
Worst student name I've ever seen: "Nigah Brown". It was Mr. Brown for the entire school year. Seriously, how could you?!
An Associated Press report I saw June 9 says parents in Norway are picking names from the Ikea catalogue. Perfectly OK,, so Long as they're careful;. for example, the name Huvudroll certainly falls trippingly from the tongue--but it means meatballs.
Sure, why not give other kids another reason to make fun of their children.
19th Cy religious parents often used names like Faith, Hope, Charity, Prudence, Patience, and sometimes used names of Bible personages. In 20th Cy USA some black parents, possibly seeking name that would confer automatic respect, sometimes used military ranks. I have personally run across Lieutenant and Commodore. In Revolutionary Russia, some zealous Leninist parents named their children for some of the goals and/or accomplishments of the workers' Paradise. Radio and rural Electrification are among those I've found.
Remember sitcom How i met your mother? There was that canadian woman, Robin
Aaaand... What about people named D**k C**k? There is one Rock group, Blackbriar, and their singer is Zora C**k. Where i live,zora means twillight 😁
How about names based on food? I once saw a person on a reality TV show called Lasagna. She had no idea her name was dinner.
There are conditions though. I had a friend, Galina, which is a lovely name in Russia, but means chicken in my language. The nickname Kaka, in Brazil, means poop in other countries. Sometimes names just don't travel well. Siri, means penis in Georgian, and Finland has a chips brand called Megapussi, which i think means big bag, or something like that
My name is Sky Heighway, male 45 years old. So I can relate, big time. I changed my first name for a few years at 12 years old. My middle name is Jarrah. It's a tree used for train sleepers and boat building. Trains planes boats and automobiles. I should have gone into a career in travel. I have met many people with strange and funny names and I can confirm it usually mean your parents were or are selfish idiots. I met a guy named Rock Stone. Laughed at him (he was a lot bigger than me). He got angry until I introduced myself (we were in a professional setting were I don't normally introduce myself). I met a 4yr old boy named Lucifer. He was trouble, but that was obvious at that point because his parents were doing a terrible job. The best thing you can do to help is openly mock anyone who tells you they are thinking about giving their kids a name like this. Or recommend to someone thinking about it to do the internet test. Or at the very least give them a back up name as well
If I see a family (looking at you America) where the grandfather is named James George Adams (for example). Then his son is called James George Adams ll; then his son is called James George Adams lll, ad nauseum. This is pure laziness. Can't be bothered to think of a name. I can understand following a tradition of a middle name through the ages, but this is not a good thing. During the time when two or more generations are living at the same address, how do they know who the letters are for? I once knew a father and son who had the same names, which was bad enough, but they also had the same birthday. It caused all sorts of difficulties.
Came across a 5 year old girl crying that her class mates kept calling her pepper pig. Her name was pepper
I saw a Name which is perfect for porn (in Germany and English speaking countries): Valentina Lust I'm still laughing.
It's really good I'm not planning on having kids ever. I'm particularly fond of Basil as a name.
I met a boy named Nixon. It took me an incredible amount of self-control to not ask why.
I at times regret naming my child Spirit Love. Then I go to her school and in her class theirs a boy named N***r (after the river in Africa) a girl Shithead pronounced shy-ead. Not to mention all the ones that they just threw letters together
I know a lady called Juliedde (after grandparents Julia and Eddie). Doesn't sound too bad but NO ONE gets it first time, obviously everyone defaults to "Juliette" and she has to spell the name, and tell the story about the grandparents, every bloody time
You win, BP. I give. I shall henceforth not return to your shores to suffer your inane b******t.
Again - an US problem, that does not exist in another civilized nations. We have laws that forbid name kids as an object [for example Apple] or a trademark [like Sony] or anything that is belittling, a slur or anyhow may harm the kid ]almost all the above in this article] and yes, this is great. It is not about your freedom as a parent, it is about the kid's wellbeing. If you cannot deal with not being "original" when naming kid - you are mentally a kid yourself and should not procreate at all.
