593Kviews
40 Hilariously Unfortunate Names Parents Actually Give Their Children, According To People In This Thread
593Kviews
A person's name is a huge part of their identity. It's what our teachers call us in class, what our partners moan in bed, and, ultimately, what our tombstone will say.
But sometimes it not only describes those who wear it but the ones that came up with it as well, and can say a lot about their creativity. Or the lack of it.
There's a post on Reddit by user Frasepalm that asks the question, "What baby name immediately makes you lose all respect for the parents and why?" As of this article, it has over 13,000 comments, many of which suggest that not everyone should be allowed to fill out their child's birth certificate.
This post may include affiliate links.
Ohnasti
Supposedly pronounced “Honesty” but all I’ll ever see is “Oh Nasty!”
Back when I worked with children, I met a young lass named Younique. I felt sorry for her. She was only 4-5 at the time, and the moment she entered school, she began to hate it because the other children thought that it was silly and wouldn’t play with her. Eventually, the dad of another child said that it was a bad name *to her face.* Seriously. Don’t do things like this to your children. They aren’t pets. They’ll have to deal with the repercussions of your bad naming choices.
Once got beat up by a pair of identical twins cause they didn't like my name
So my Wife was giving birth to our first Son and the midwife asked if we’d chosen a name yet. We said yes and told her ‘Seth’. She replied “Oh thank goodness, a normal name! The last woman in here named her child Precious Bunny!”
One time when I was working at a motel, I took a reservation over the phone from a woman for her daughter:
Woman: Her name is Sri Lanka, S R I space L A N K A...
Me: Oh, you mean like the country!
Woman: Whaddaya mean, country?!?
Not so much a specific name, but gross butcherings of names. Ie. Kaightlynne instead of Caitlyn.
One little girl got her name legally changed in court, because her parents named her Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii.
I used to write on cakes, the worst name I ever saw was "Tuba Poo". I asked if it was a nickname, it was not. It's been like 6 years and it still haunts me. Her mother's name was Natalie, why Natalie? Why?
Any name based on a popular TV series or movie. Like, if I see your daughter is named Khaleesi, I think significantly less of you as a person.
People that name their kids things like that are generally chavs/bogans/whatever the American equivalent is of those two words.
I had a set of twins (I'm a teacher) a couple years ago named Heaven and Nevaeh.
I had four kids named Shaun in one class, all spelled differently, none spelled Shaun or Sean.
I had a girl named Jezebel and boys named Jesus and Messiah in one class. (Nothing really wrong with those names, but having all three in one class was odd.) I also had a kid named Ted that year. Not Theodore or Edward, just Ted. I saw his birth certificate, just Ted.
This year, one of the other teachers has a boy named M'Lord. I'm not even making that.
What's getting my goat this year is the random apostrophes. Your child's name is Elayna, a lovely name, IMO, but E'lay'na is ridiculous. I have three girls with random apostrophes in their names, its annoying.
I had a teacher in grade 1/2 whose last name was Dyck (sounds like d**k). Fortunately at that age I didn't think anything of it. Apparently her parents didn't think anything of it either...
Her parents named her Rhoda. Rhoda Dyck. I have to assume they were sadistic assholes.
Just changed all of my plans for today so I can re-watch every episode of Letterkenny lol
My cousin named her son named Lincoln, which isn't bad by itself.
At least until she had her daughter, Kennedy. She said she plans on naming her next kid Garfield.
She literally names her kids after the last names of *assassinated presidents.*
Kash. It isn't the worst name in the world but the fact his second name was 'Ransom', made it a whole lot worse.
Kash Ransom.
I was on a little league baseball team with these two brothers named Doer and Achiever.
Talk about pressure to perform, those parents had expectations.
Achiever sounds like someone sneezing if said quickly, which is bad enough, but Doer? That just seems lazy, like they thought of achiever then couldn't come up with anything else.
A co-worker has a friend who named her daughters Vengeance and Violence.
Are they twins? Are they identical? Do they wear blue dresses? Do they live in a hotel?
A few years ago there was a guy in my area in the news. His first name was Justice. He's doing 100 years for stabbing 3 people.
Chicago, North, True. Just to name a few. I’m no Kardashian hater, but I really can’t stand the names they give their kids.
Chicago is ok-ish only because growing up I had a friend named California we all called her Cali for short. But North and True is strange...and Apple.
Strap in and prepare for rough seas!
My mom is a midwife and one day she came home with what she thought was the epitome of dumb names.
These parents had just gotten back from a trip to the states, where they had visited a dock to look at boats, and one of those beautiful boats had an even more beautiful and exotic name, they wanted to name their baby daughter after this boat.
Usnavy
My mom is a saint for not laughing.
I mean it could be true but it's a little ripped from musical theatre: "Usnavi de la Vega is the central protagonist of In the Heights. Originally from the Dominican Republic, he arrived in Washington Heights with his parents when he was very young. His name is based on the boat they saw when they came in (US NAVY)."
I have a nephew named Anfernee, and I know how mad he gets when I call him Anthony. Almost as mad as I get when I think about the fact that my sister named him Anfernee.
Someone I know is a nurse in the ER so they've delivered quite a few babies. But one day they said that one set of parents decided to name their kid Ssss. You pronounce Ssss, Forest.
Nevaeh, although I think that has more to do with the fact that every parent I know who has named their baby this is a teenager who thinks they’re “soooo cool” for dropping out of school in 9th grade, who are about as deep as a puddle but think they’re Aristotle or Shakespeare because “it’s heaven spelled backwards since she’s my angel”
Naming your child Bear makes me think you’re a huge twat. Mostly because I’ve met a few gorgeous children called Bear and everyone of the parents were huge twats.
Saw a fun name on the attendance sheet (so this is official) of one of my classes: Daddyboi
The overly matchy names to the point of ridiculousness. My top example is a set of brothers named Romance, Romantic, and Romeo.
Baby. As in the Dirty Dancing lead female. Because nobody in the professional world is going to want their name to be Baby.
I went to high school with a one "Crystal Shanda Lear."
This was back before dumb names were the rage. She would have been named that in, say, 81-82. Poor girl. I don't know that I lost respect for the parents so much as felt bad for her to be saddled with that s**t.
Any form of Aiden (Aidin, Ayden, Aidyn, Ayeden) and/or Ashley (Ashlee, Ashleigh, Ashlie, Ashli, Ash-Lee).
I am a teacher and have had students with all those variations. I actually had 3 Aidens and 4 Ashleys (none of which were spelled normally) in a class of 23 students.
Like come on parents, you aren't being original by making your kid's name ridiculous to spell.
I lose respect for parents who give their kids first names that when added to their given last names become horrible. The parents don't even care that their kid has to live with it. Two real examples I've come across are Richard Sieman (The guy's name is D**k Semen, for f***s sake.) And even worse, Desire Cox.
I normally agree, but every now and then you come across one that is actually kind of cool, in a "You could be famous with a name like that" way. Three examples I have known, all of whom were born between 1900 and 1920 were, Joy Devine and the brother and sister Treble and Tenor Bell. Edit: Also, look at my name, remove the later addition of "Hudson" and then sing "Puff the Magic Dragon". Just the first couple of lines.
I knew three sisters names -Autumn-Breeze, Summer-Skye and April-Rain.
Bonus addition one of them had a kid and named it Gidget.
Edit for those wondering: This is in Eastern Canada.
I’ve taught:
- Precious
- Princess
- Righteousness
- Blessing
- Pious
- Destiny
*edit* forgot Sincere
I’ve taught an Annikin (yep, right after the prequel came out) Merlin, Wrigley (girl) Emmahleigh, and Aspen Forest.
I had a chemistry teacher who was an avid runner. He proudly told us his three children were named Miles, Lane, and Chase. How narcissistic do you have to be to name your children after your hobby?
I was once checking in a customer for service.
EmoChanel
And she was very proud of it.
You know the Duggar family (19 Kids and Counting)? One of their daughters named their son Spurgeon. SPURGEON.
Names with uneccessary letters or the rarely-seen, lack of necessary letters:
Jaiymes
Jaxn
Khaydence
Aayden
I once worked for Build-a-Bear Workshop. In one of their new hire training videos there was an employee taking to the camera about who the f**k knows because all I could focus on was her name tag. It said "Om'unique". Like, I'm Unique, except worse. I still have no idea what she was taking about.
I met the adult child of parents who named their daughter Morticia Addams, after the TV Show. I made her show me her driver's license and there was the proof. Her own parents had a different last name.
Prancer and Vixen for babies born during the Christmas season.
MyLuv (yes, I have met a kid named this). That poor kid is probably not going to be successful, unless they change their name later on.
Note: this post originally had 77 images. It’s been shortened to the top 40 images based on user votes.
In am so happy about the regulation of names in Germany. They have to be gender specific and have to be normal enough that the kid don't have to suffer.
It's good that only normal names are allowed. The gender specific part I am not too sure about. Fr example, I know a person who was born with male and female genitals and was named Robin. Because that way they could sort out later if male or female. Robin decided not to choose and the name still fits.
My mom gave my sister and I unisex names so that, on a college or job application, nobody would be able to tell if we were male or female. (She dealt with a lot of sexism in the industry where she worked for decades)
You could never do that here in the States, everyone would start screaming about civil liberties.
Of course... Why am I not surprised? Meanwhile, you end up with all those stupid names that give all sorts of aggro to the unfortunate kids. Why do the parents behave so selfishly?
Gender specific gets iffy. I have a friend named Sasha (Alexander), a man from Russia. And another friend named Sasha, a woman in the US. Michele is a man's name in France, and Michelle is a woman's name in the US. Then there are great names that can be either gender.
And still you get people with the last name Schläger try to name their kid Dennis (Dennis Schläger, sounds like the German word for tennis racket) or people with the last name Grube try to name their daughter Kläre (As in "Klärgrube" - "Septic Tank" in English).
Very similar in czech republic, we even have a set of names parents can choose from. If you want something more unique, it's up to the person who officiate the birth certificate if they agree to that name.... And thanks to our language odities, our names Are mostly gendered, like Jiří (male)/Jiřina (female)- the same name but slightly different for each gender. Jan (m)/Jana (f); Alexandr/Alexandra; Jindřich/Jindřiška And so on... There Is couple of names that doesn't have their opposite gender version, and just a few that are typically gender neutral (like Robin)...
One of the moments I cheer for our bureaucracy.
I worked with a woman who's first name was Jenatul. Yes, it's pronounced exactly as you think it is. No, she didn't go by Jen. Used that full name and was proud of it.
"Dr Tull, Dr Jenna Tull, please report to Urology"
Some countries regulate this by law. Some say that it is a violation of Human Rights to mess with parents freedom of will. I say "Screw them".
In my country it wasnt regulated, until a kindda celebrity named his child Neurona H2O. Couple of months and some regulations took place. He then changed her name to something more normal.
I think they could do SOMETHING - like stop punctuation from being randomly inserted into names.
They don't give their children any freedom of will, so yes "Screw them"
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
As "a land of free" Murrica suspiciously loves slavery from day one till this day. It is "a land of free" only if you are a white cis-male of catholic background and wealthy.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
White males have less rights than you think.... political leaders are the main issues preventing our true freedom. They take away our guns and expect us to just allow a criminal with a gun to break in to our homes and take/do what they want with whom they want
"Dokhtar bas" was a common name in my country and still is in some less developed areas. If I want to translate it in english it says, "enough daughters". Just imagine your name shows that you are not wanted just because of your gender.
Terrible. Which country is this?
Iran
American problem, in Europe there are laws to protect thce children.... my italian Grandmother wanted to name her son "Gianni" but this name was not allowed in 1941, so he was christened "Giovanni", but nobody ever called him so
Meh, kids can end up with stupid names in Europe too. I know a kid whose name is Momchiliyan, as opposed to the traditional Momchil. It sounds stupid as hell, but it's not forbidden since it's not offensive. It's become a trend in my country for parents to come up with "unique" twists on normal names, which always sound really dumb, lest their kid end up with a common (aka decent) name.
Whats wrong with Gianni?
I dont know per se in otaly but in spain at the time you could only call people by saints names. So you could be Javier but not Javi (legally). Not it is allowed.
I think Pisco is right
I came across a young lady named LaPrecious.
I went to college with Sweetheart. She was Asian American, but I didn’t know her well enough to know if English language learning played a role in her parents’ name choice.
I watch something on TV a looooong time ago about a woman named Cupcake. Apparently, her mother had some complications or something?? while giving birth or shortly thereafter and was pretty out of it when they came and asked her what she would like to name her.... she misunderstood and in her delirium, thought they asked what she would like eat.... and all she could think of was how bad she wanted a cupcake. They kept asking her, and asking if she was SURE?? The mom insisted, Yes, Cupcake, that's what I want.... For some reason the name was never changed after the error was discovered.... and the woman that was already an adult at time of story said she liked the name her Mom gave her. All in all, it was a very 'sweet' story the way the woman shared it.
In The Netherlands occasionally someone names their son 'Ad'. If the kid was born after WWII this has either meant the parents are nazi sympathizers who named their kid in honor of Adolf H. or the parents are ignorant fools. I don't advice naming your son 'Aad' or 'Dolf' either. No, I don't care that was you grandfathers name, just don't. In middel school I had Adje proclaim some very peculiar views in history class. No one in our village was talking to the parents after that. 🙄
Yes, that's what bugged me as a teacher with kids named after Nordic/Germanic god's, at least here in rural Eastern Germany: Every parent who named their kid (born ca.1993-2007) "Loki/Thor/Freya/Odin" was/is definitely one of openly neo nazi racist "völkisch" scumbags. Sorry not sorry for being judgemental, we had like up to 20% of right wing voters in some villages here. This was looooong before those "Thor"-movies. Its different now because of the influence of those movies, or if e.g. a Norwegian parent chose those names.
But even they n e v e r dared to call their offspring Adolf/Adi/Dolf. It's such a taboo in Germany, I cannot imagine someone does this in the Netherlands, of all countries 😦.
It happens more often than you would think. Alas.
There are naming laws in Australia that say that you cannot name a child anything that is going to cause distress. I would like to believe that they are taking into account the distress of the child, as well as anyone that will need to interact with the child over their lifetime.
There should be a law against giving kids embarassing names.
You don´t have to butcher spelling to get unusual names, you can be creative with Latin. For example there was a Decimus et Ultimus (means "10th and Last"), whose parents must have been fed up by now.
My aunt (whose last name is Wood) named her daughter Petra. This is a great name, had her middle name not been Fied. Petra Fied Wood.
I met someone named Chloe Jade Bratz. She legally changed her name.
D**k C*x. He's in his forties I think, and he goes by 'Cocky'.
i know someone called Misty. her middle name? Blue
There was a US swimmer named Misty Hyman.
3 facts. 1.This guarantees the future careers of many therapists. 2. Many of these children will change their names not just because THEY REALLY dislike their names and, they know their careers will curtailed, but because of all the misery/torment they have experienced because of teasing. because of that name. 3. For a number of reasons, many of these kids will act out and P;articipate" in the juvenile justice system.
I met a boy named Nixon. It took an incredible amount of self-control to avoid asking why. Maybe it's been long enough, but still...
This problem goes way back. My dad (born 1909) had a school friend whose parents, Mr & Mrs Butts, named their daughter Ophelia. My dad still laughed about it 70-something years later.
I work with a man whose name is "Random Frie" (pronounced 'fry'). Just... why?
There is a German skier called F@nny Chmelar. In German this is fine. In English, it is...less fine.
I worked at a band store in high school. In spring and summer, we'd have reps go to schools all over to sign parents up for our rent-to-own instrument program. Another Lady & I would take the names, find an instrument for the kid, and tag it w/the appropriate name & school. We had some doozies. A girl whose last name was Halloween, & lived on Spooky Hollow Dr. Another girl - I can't remember how they spelled it - but sounded out was "Glorious God Hallelujah." A million different ways to spell Hayley, McKenzie, Kayley, etc. Sometimes so weird that it had to be spelled out letter by letter to get it right when writing the tag.
I was working customer service at Walmart and met a lady and her 3 kids. Oldest (9-10years): Sterling Knight. Middle (3-4yrs): Sterling Ruger. Youngest (4-6mo): Sterling Gunner. I didn't ask the spellings but I'm sure they were also ridiculous.
I have a very normal name. In fact, it's the name of a wine. However, my wonderful Mom (Cathy, not Kathy or Katherine...just Cathy) decided to spell it differently. How many people on this planet would automatically know to spell my name S-H-E-R-I and not S-H-E-R-R-Y??
There was a girl in my 10th grade French class named “Baby”. I felt so sorry for her. She was only in that school for a few weeks or a month. I’m sorry, but I can’t take anyone named Baby seriously. Also, my sisters mother in law was a social worker. The number of kids called La-a (Ladasha) was astounding
the one I heard that gets me is Le-A pronounced Le-Dash-Ah
I worked in an inner city charity hospital in the 70s. At one time they had put neck beads on babies saying "Male" or "Female" and the last name of the mother. In the patient records for the hospital, you sometimes came across older children named Male or Female (pronounced "Mah-lay" or "Fem-allay".
Check out the book “Freakonomics” it has a whole chapter researching the effects of a name
You can be original without having to name your child with some weird, misspelled or unappropriated name. You can research in books or online for names that maybe aren't used so much anymore, that belongs to literature or whatever and find something that is not so common like John, but even not so idiotic like some that I found in this post
Enteckt and Nolge pronounced Intellect and Knowledge…
Surprised that I didn't see the name Sir.... when I questioned how the parents thought of it they said that they wanted to make sure he was addressed with respect. Apparently respect is to be given automatically and not ever earned
I used to work in medical records at a hospital in the late 90s. Saw the name Timber Ree for a newborn. I joked for years about that name and how I can imagine her getting called into the house "Timberrrrrrrrrrrr." FF 20ish years and on the front page of the paper was an article where she'd been shot breaking and entering a guy's house on a drug deal gone wrong.
once i met a girl named Reighneigh (pronounced renée). mire like re-neighm me
if you gonna do this just play the sims
So many of the names here would have been fine if they were just Nicknames. Name your kid something normal and then just call them "Prancer" or "Apple" or whatever.
Everyone, when naming your kids, please remember that they have to live with these names. They won't be your baby forever and please give them a name they can live as a normal adult with
I think Iceland goes a bit too far in regulating names, but it's easy to understand why after reading this list. My parents (born in 44) :went to school with Merry Christmas, and the brothers Bean. First names? Green and Pressed.
Heard of this lady who named her daughter Female but pronounced it fee-mahl-ay
Honest truth I once worked with a woman named Sandy D**k. You'd think she would prefer to use Sandra or Alexandra, but nope: She was Sandy D**k.
I have a regular name, spelled a regular way but have still seen about 4 variations of it's spelling when i tell people and they write it down.
I knew some triplets from a church named Faith, Hope, and Love.
My friend's daughter has a bf named Blade. I feel like he had a rat tail haircut 20 years ago.
i worked in a legal field that required that i see birth certificates of client's children. i have seen sisters remember remember for one and the other was the same thing repeated as well but i don't remember. the interesting one was the guy who called all his daughters his 'jewel of life': ruby, pearl, diamond, emerald, and sardonyx.
I have a friend who's 5yr old son is call Orion, (which I think is cute and really suits him but a lot of people don't like.) My old neighbour had twin boys called Thor and Odin, her best friend had 2 daughters called ophelia and pandora. My half-sister has a 2yr old son named Ragnarok, she's pregnant with baby no2 right now and everyone is constantly joking about what she'll name this one. (She's a massive poser and attention seeker who wants to be seen as a 'rock chick' despite being anything but)
I visited schools for my job, and one time whilst in reception a kid was late and had to be buzzed through, 'on you go simian' for those that don't know, simian is another name for monkey. This is is SE london, make of that what you will
Kid named KingSolomon. Mom's name is Sundai.
Worked at a kids party place years ago, and some of the names on that went in the cakes ... Whew! Memorable ones included : Heyzeus Lxndryuh (pronounced Alexandria) K'sandra Ja'rai'la (which is pretty, but overly punctuated) Neve and Nave (twins)
What about my brother's twins? Denise and Denephew. 😜
Elon Musk has two children named Exa Dark Sideræl and X AE A-XII.... the last one was supposed to have a funky 'AE' combo letter and a -12 at the end but California made them alter it..... nice to know there are SOME limits to what you named your kids🤦🏻♀️.....
I worked at a summer camp Witha woman named Isis (this was before 9-11). My favorit that I heard was Sierra Mist after the soda came out. The last one might be a joke but i did hear "Candy Sprinkles would you please meet your party at the front Gate" This was at a state fair if it is a real name fell bad for this person if it was a joke page then it was a good one.
Isis was an ancient Egyptian goddess.... my brother named my niece Jazmin Sierra (Jasmin the Disney princess and Sierra after Sierra Mist)
I admit I changed the "C" in my kid's name to a "K" because I honestly think the letter "C" looks funny
I was a former lunch lady. I had kids named Bella, Edward, Jacob and Seth all in one kindergarten class. I also had identical twins Sunshyne and Rayne. I also had another set of twin girls named Chrysanthemun and Daisy who were completely into the whole Goth style.
There's a comedian who does a funny bit about losing one of her in-laws named Coen (pronounced c**n) and having to call his name as quietly as possible in a store.
Naming conventions are different from culture to culture and change over time. Could we maybe just let people do their thing?
Didn't we honestly have a listicle like this a little less than a month ago?
Frank Zappa’s kids - Dweezil and Moon-Unit
Last I heard Dweezil was still using this name. My sister went out with him a few times. Moon-Unit just changed to Moon.
I've known both Ophelia Coxwell and Anita Crotchfelt.
https://church-of-jesus-christ-facts.net/names1/ great website for all these “unique names”
La-a. Said la-dash-a.
Around the time naming your child after the place they were conceived became fashionable, I came across a child with the middle name "Layby". I don't know if the term is used in other countries, but in the UK, a layby (or lay-by) is a stopping place for vehicles at the side of a road.
Growing up I knew 3 brothers name Adam, Hoss, and Little Joe! Guess whose dad was a Bonanza super fan? The dad even insisted he be called Ben (not his given name) WTH?
I once bought a bright pink iMac G3 at a thrift shop. Found it had loads of personal work related stuff on it (I won't go into what it was because it may be a bit too easy to trace her down). Took me some time to figure out the woman who used to own it was ACTUALLY called Barbie. I sent her an e-mail and she came over very friendly and intelligent, the computer suggested she had a well-paid job so all is well in the end. She told me her work actually accidentally got rid of her personal computer and that she was happy for me to keep it, if I could be so kind do remove the personal data (she had backups of everything important already). So I did. Seriously though. Barbie. And a pink iMac. 2021_NYR_2...5-jpeg.jpg
My question is why do people dislike the name Destiny so much? Is it cause of the video game? I’d much rather name my child Destiny than any of these names
Worst student name I've ever seen: "Nigah Brown". It was Mr. Brown for the entire school year. Seriously, how could you?!
An Associated Press report I saw June 9 says parents in Norway are picking names from the Ikea catalogue. Perfectly OK,, so Long as they're careful;. for example, the name Huvudroll certainly falls trippingly from the tongue--but it means meatballs.
Sure, why not give other kids another reason to make fun of their children.
19th Cy religious parents often used names like Faith, Hope, Charity, Prudence, Patience, and sometimes used names of Bible personages. In 20th Cy USA some black parents, possibly seeking name that would confer automatic respect, sometimes used military ranks. I have personally run across Lieutenant and Commodore. In Revolutionary Russia, some zealous Leninist parents named their children for some of the goals and/or accomplishments of the workers' Paradise. Radio and rural Electrification are among those I've found.
I have a very ordinary name, yet I mostly always have to spell it, so I am glad I didn't get any og those posted here.
And there is also North West Kardashian...
Remember sitcom How i met your mother? There was that canadian woman, Robin
Aaaand... What about people named D**k C**k? There is one Rock group, Blackbriar, and their singer is Zora C**k. Where i live,zora means twillight 😁
This is what we get when idiots reproduce ... :/
How about names based on food? I once saw a person on a reality TV show called Lasagna. She had no idea her name was dinner.
Here are the names in my school that could qualify for this list: Aleigha (Female), Leighla (Female), Kaleigha (Female), Addisyn (Female), Tegan (Male), Zephaniah (Male), Kailyn (Female), Eoghan (Male), Zoephia (Female), Solomon (Male), Maxwell (Male), Malachi (Male), Aaliyah (Male), Aayden (Male), Tierney (Male), Kael (Male), Ainsley (Female), Layne (I don't know), Leighton (I don't know), Avia-Che (Female), Ja'lil (Male), Mazlyn (Female), Boaz (Male), Da'mlre (I don't know), And plenty more 0.0. [[Edit, added comments]]
There are conditions though. I had a friend, Galina, which is a lovely name in Russia, but means chicken in my language. The nickname Kaka, in Brazil, means poop in other countries. Sometimes names just don't travel well. Siri, means penis in Georgian, and Finland has a chips brand called Megapussi, which i think means big bag, or something like that
When my third child was born the nurse told us about a couple who named their son Labia. It's pronounced lah-BEE-ah. But we all know what a labia is.
My name is Sky Heighway, male 45 years old. So I can relate, big time. I changed my first name for a few years at 12 years old. My middle name is Jarrah. It's a tree used for train sleepers and boat building. Trains planes boats and automobiles. I should have gone into a career in travel. I have met many people with strange and funny names and I can confirm it usually mean your parents were or are selfish idiots. I met a guy named Rock Stone. Laughed at him (he was a lot bigger than me). He got angry until I introduced myself (we were in a professional setting were I don't normally introduce myself). I met a 4yr old boy named Lucifer. He was trouble, but that was obvious at that point because his parents were doing a terrible job. The best thing you can do to help is openly mock anyone who tells you they are thinking about giving their kids a name like this. Or recommend to someone thinking about it to do the internet test. Or at the very least give them a back up name as well
If I see a family (looking at you America) where the grandfather is named James George Adams (for example). Then his son is called James George Adams ll; then his son is called James George Adams lll, ad nauseum. This is pure laziness. Can't be bothered to think of a name. I can understand following a tradition of a middle name through the ages, but this is not a good thing. During the time when two or more generations are living at the same address, how do they know who the letters are for? I once knew a father and son who had the same names, which was bad enough, but they also had the same birthday. It caused all sorts of difficulties.
Came across a 5 year old girl crying that her class mates kept calling her pepper pig. Her name was pepper
I saw a Name which is perfect for porn (in Germany and English speaking countries): Valentina Lust I'm still laughing.
I knew a guy many years ago called Richard Head.
Where to start? My sister's best friend is Candy (legally, her birth name). Used to babysit 3 kids - Austin, Cisco (short for Francisco, as in San Francisco), and Santiago. Went to HS w a girl named Emma Leigh (Leigh was her last name).
It's really good I'm not planning on having kids ever. I'm particularly fond of Basil as a name.
My friend named her son Spike.
Is your friend a bulldog?
What do y'all think of the name Harbor/ Harbour?
I met a boy named Nixon. It took me an incredible amount of self-control to not ask why.
This comment has been deleted.
I at times regret naming my child Spirit Love. Then I go to her school and in her class theirs a boy named N***r (after the river in Africa) a girl Shithead pronounced shy-ead. Not to mention all the ones that they just threw letters together
Harley Jaxx, I understand the father is a fan of SoA but puhlease!
Not one mention of Moon Unit or Dweezil? I'm so old.
If I have kids and its a boy jorge (George) or Jaime if its a girl i really like Esperanza (hope) or Daniela
I know a lady called Juliedde (after grandparents Julia and Eddie). Doesn't sound too bad but NO ONE gets it first time, obviously everyone defaults to "Juliette" and she has to spell the name, and tell the story about the grandparents, every bloody time
You win, BP. I give. I shall henceforth not return to your shores to suffer your inane b******t.
Again - an US problem, that does not exist in another civilized nations. We have laws that forbid name kids as an object [for example Apple] or a trademark [like Sony] or anything that is belittling, a slur or anyhow may harm the kid ]almost all the above in this article] and yes, this is great. It is not about your freedom as a parent, it is about the kid's wellbeing. If you cannot deal with not being "original" when naming kid - you are mentally a kid yourself and should not procreate at all.
In am so happy about the regulation of names in Germany. They have to be gender specific and have to be normal enough that the kid don't have to suffer.
It's good that only normal names are allowed. The gender specific part I am not too sure about. Fr example, I know a person who was born with male and female genitals and was named Robin. Because that way they could sort out later if male or female. Robin decided not to choose and the name still fits.
My mom gave my sister and I unisex names so that, on a college or job application, nobody would be able to tell if we were male or female. (She dealt with a lot of sexism in the industry where she worked for decades)
You could never do that here in the States, everyone would start screaming about civil liberties.
Of course... Why am I not surprised? Meanwhile, you end up with all those stupid names that give all sorts of aggro to the unfortunate kids. Why do the parents behave so selfishly?
Gender specific gets iffy. I have a friend named Sasha (Alexander), a man from Russia. And another friend named Sasha, a woman in the US. Michele is a man's name in France, and Michelle is a woman's name in the US. Then there are great names that can be either gender.
And still you get people with the last name Schläger try to name their kid Dennis (Dennis Schläger, sounds like the German word for tennis racket) or people with the last name Grube try to name their daughter Kläre (As in "Klärgrube" - "Septic Tank" in English).
Very similar in czech republic, we even have a set of names parents can choose from. If you want something more unique, it's up to the person who officiate the birth certificate if they agree to that name.... And thanks to our language odities, our names Are mostly gendered, like Jiří (male)/Jiřina (female)- the same name but slightly different for each gender. Jan (m)/Jana (f); Alexandr/Alexandra; Jindřich/Jindřiška And so on... There Is couple of names that doesn't have their opposite gender version, and just a few that are typically gender neutral (like Robin)...
One of the moments I cheer for our bureaucracy.
I worked with a woman who's first name was Jenatul. Yes, it's pronounced exactly as you think it is. No, she didn't go by Jen. Used that full name and was proud of it.
"Dr Tull, Dr Jenna Tull, please report to Urology"
Some countries regulate this by law. Some say that it is a violation of Human Rights to mess with parents freedom of will. I say "Screw them".
In my country it wasnt regulated, until a kindda celebrity named his child Neurona H2O. Couple of months and some regulations took place. He then changed her name to something more normal.
I think they could do SOMETHING - like stop punctuation from being randomly inserted into names.
They don't give their children any freedom of will, so yes "Screw them"
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
As "a land of free" Murrica suspiciously loves slavery from day one till this day. It is "a land of free" only if you are a white cis-male of catholic background and wealthy.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
White males have less rights than you think.... political leaders are the main issues preventing our true freedom. They take away our guns and expect us to just allow a criminal with a gun to break in to our homes and take/do what they want with whom they want
"Dokhtar bas" was a common name in my country and still is in some less developed areas. If I want to translate it in english it says, "enough daughters". Just imagine your name shows that you are not wanted just because of your gender.
Terrible. Which country is this?
Iran
American problem, in Europe there are laws to protect thce children.... my italian Grandmother wanted to name her son "Gianni" but this name was not allowed in 1941, so he was christened "Giovanni", but nobody ever called him so
Meh, kids can end up with stupid names in Europe too. I know a kid whose name is Momchiliyan, as opposed to the traditional Momchil. It sounds stupid as hell, but it's not forbidden since it's not offensive. It's become a trend in my country for parents to come up with "unique" twists on normal names, which always sound really dumb, lest their kid end up with a common (aka decent) name.
Whats wrong with Gianni?
I dont know per se in otaly but in spain at the time you could only call people by saints names. So you could be Javier but not Javi (legally). Not it is allowed.
I think Pisco is right
I came across a young lady named LaPrecious.
I went to college with Sweetheart. She was Asian American, but I didn’t know her well enough to know if English language learning played a role in her parents’ name choice.
I watch something on TV a looooong time ago about a woman named Cupcake. Apparently, her mother had some complications or something?? while giving birth or shortly thereafter and was pretty out of it when they came and asked her what she would like to name her.... she misunderstood and in her delirium, thought they asked what she would like eat.... and all she could think of was how bad she wanted a cupcake. They kept asking her, and asking if she was SURE?? The mom insisted, Yes, Cupcake, that's what I want.... For some reason the name was never changed after the error was discovered.... and the woman that was already an adult at time of story said she liked the name her Mom gave her. All in all, it was a very 'sweet' story the way the woman shared it.
In The Netherlands occasionally someone names their son 'Ad'. If the kid was born after WWII this has either meant the parents are nazi sympathizers who named their kid in honor of Adolf H. or the parents are ignorant fools. I don't advice naming your son 'Aad' or 'Dolf' either. No, I don't care that was you grandfathers name, just don't. In middel school I had Adje proclaim some very peculiar views in history class. No one in our village was talking to the parents after that. 🙄
Yes, that's what bugged me as a teacher with kids named after Nordic/Germanic god's, at least here in rural Eastern Germany: Every parent who named their kid (born ca.1993-2007) "Loki/Thor/Freya/Odin" was/is definitely one of openly neo nazi racist "völkisch" scumbags. Sorry not sorry for being judgemental, we had like up to 20% of right wing voters in some villages here. This was looooong before those "Thor"-movies. Its different now because of the influence of those movies, or if e.g. a Norwegian parent chose those names.
But even they n e v e r dared to call their offspring Adolf/Adi/Dolf. It's such a taboo in Germany, I cannot imagine someone does this in the Netherlands, of all countries 😦.
It happens more often than you would think. Alas.
There are naming laws in Australia that say that you cannot name a child anything that is going to cause distress. I would like to believe that they are taking into account the distress of the child, as well as anyone that will need to interact with the child over their lifetime.
There should be a law against giving kids embarassing names.
You don´t have to butcher spelling to get unusual names, you can be creative with Latin. For example there was a Decimus et Ultimus (means "10th and Last"), whose parents must have been fed up by now.
My aunt (whose last name is Wood) named her daughter Petra. This is a great name, had her middle name not been Fied. Petra Fied Wood.
I met someone named Chloe Jade Bratz. She legally changed her name.
D**k C*x. He's in his forties I think, and he goes by 'Cocky'.
i know someone called Misty. her middle name? Blue
There was a US swimmer named Misty Hyman.
3 facts. 1.This guarantees the future careers of many therapists. 2. Many of these children will change their names not just because THEY REALLY dislike their names and, they know their careers will curtailed, but because of all the misery/torment they have experienced because of teasing. because of that name. 3. For a number of reasons, many of these kids will act out and P;articipate" in the juvenile justice system.
I met a boy named Nixon. It took an incredible amount of self-control to avoid asking why. Maybe it's been long enough, but still...
This problem goes way back. My dad (born 1909) had a school friend whose parents, Mr & Mrs Butts, named their daughter Ophelia. My dad still laughed about it 70-something years later.
I work with a man whose name is "Random Frie" (pronounced 'fry'). Just... why?
There is a German skier called F@nny Chmelar. In German this is fine. In English, it is...less fine.
I worked at a band store in high school. In spring and summer, we'd have reps go to schools all over to sign parents up for our rent-to-own instrument program. Another Lady & I would take the names, find an instrument for the kid, and tag it w/the appropriate name & school. We had some doozies. A girl whose last name was Halloween, & lived on Spooky Hollow Dr. Another girl - I can't remember how they spelled it - but sounded out was "Glorious God Hallelujah." A million different ways to spell Hayley, McKenzie, Kayley, etc. Sometimes so weird that it had to be spelled out letter by letter to get it right when writing the tag.
I was working customer service at Walmart and met a lady and her 3 kids. Oldest (9-10years): Sterling Knight. Middle (3-4yrs): Sterling Ruger. Youngest (4-6mo): Sterling Gunner. I didn't ask the spellings but I'm sure they were also ridiculous.
I have a very normal name. In fact, it's the name of a wine. However, my wonderful Mom (Cathy, not Kathy or Katherine...just Cathy) decided to spell it differently. How many people on this planet would automatically know to spell my name S-H-E-R-I and not S-H-E-R-R-Y??
There was a girl in my 10th grade French class named “Baby”. I felt so sorry for her. She was only in that school for a few weeks or a month. I’m sorry, but I can’t take anyone named Baby seriously. Also, my sisters mother in law was a social worker. The number of kids called La-a (Ladasha) was astounding
the one I heard that gets me is Le-A pronounced Le-Dash-Ah
I worked in an inner city charity hospital in the 70s. At one time they had put neck beads on babies saying "Male" or "Female" and the last name of the mother. In the patient records for the hospital, you sometimes came across older children named Male or Female (pronounced "Mah-lay" or "Fem-allay".
Check out the book “Freakonomics” it has a whole chapter researching the effects of a name
You can be original without having to name your child with some weird, misspelled or unappropriated name. You can research in books or online for names that maybe aren't used so much anymore, that belongs to literature or whatever and find something that is not so common like John, but even not so idiotic like some that I found in this post
Enteckt and Nolge pronounced Intellect and Knowledge…
Surprised that I didn't see the name Sir.... when I questioned how the parents thought of it they said that they wanted to make sure he was addressed with respect. Apparently respect is to be given automatically and not ever earned
I used to work in medical records at a hospital in the late 90s. Saw the name Timber Ree for a newborn. I joked for years about that name and how I can imagine her getting called into the house "Timberrrrrrrrrrrr." FF 20ish years and on the front page of the paper was an article where she'd been shot breaking and entering a guy's house on a drug deal gone wrong.
once i met a girl named Reighneigh (pronounced renée). mire like re-neighm me
if you gonna do this just play the sims
So many of the names here would have been fine if they were just Nicknames. Name your kid something normal and then just call them "Prancer" or "Apple" or whatever.
Everyone, when naming your kids, please remember that they have to live with these names. They won't be your baby forever and please give them a name they can live as a normal adult with
I think Iceland goes a bit too far in regulating names, but it's easy to understand why after reading this list. My parents (born in 44) :went to school with Merry Christmas, and the brothers Bean. First names? Green and Pressed.
Heard of this lady who named her daughter Female but pronounced it fee-mahl-ay
Honest truth I once worked with a woman named Sandy D**k. You'd think she would prefer to use Sandra or Alexandra, but nope: She was Sandy D**k.
I have a regular name, spelled a regular way but have still seen about 4 variations of it's spelling when i tell people and they write it down.
I knew some triplets from a church named Faith, Hope, and Love.
My friend's daughter has a bf named Blade. I feel like he had a rat tail haircut 20 years ago.
i worked in a legal field that required that i see birth certificates of client's children. i have seen sisters remember remember for one and the other was the same thing repeated as well but i don't remember. the interesting one was the guy who called all his daughters his 'jewel of life': ruby, pearl, diamond, emerald, and sardonyx.
I have a friend who's 5yr old son is call Orion, (which I think is cute and really suits him but a lot of people don't like.) My old neighbour had twin boys called Thor and Odin, her best friend had 2 daughters called ophelia and pandora. My half-sister has a 2yr old son named Ragnarok, she's pregnant with baby no2 right now and everyone is constantly joking about what she'll name this one. (She's a massive poser and attention seeker who wants to be seen as a 'rock chick' despite being anything but)
I visited schools for my job, and one time whilst in reception a kid was late and had to be buzzed through, 'on you go simian' for those that don't know, simian is another name for monkey. This is is SE london, make of that what you will
Kid named KingSolomon. Mom's name is Sundai.
Worked at a kids party place years ago, and some of the names on that went in the cakes ... Whew! Memorable ones included : Heyzeus Lxndryuh (pronounced Alexandria) K'sandra Ja'rai'la (which is pretty, but overly punctuated) Neve and Nave (twins)
What about my brother's twins? Denise and Denephew. 😜
Elon Musk has two children named Exa Dark Sideræl and X AE A-XII.... the last one was supposed to have a funky 'AE' combo letter and a -12 at the end but California made them alter it..... nice to know there are SOME limits to what you named your kids🤦🏻♀️.....
I worked at a summer camp Witha woman named Isis (this was before 9-11). My favorit that I heard was Sierra Mist after the soda came out. The last one might be a joke but i did hear "Candy Sprinkles would you please meet your party at the front Gate" This was at a state fair if it is a real name fell bad for this person if it was a joke page then it was a good one.
Isis was an ancient Egyptian goddess.... my brother named my niece Jazmin Sierra (Jasmin the Disney princess and Sierra after Sierra Mist)
I admit I changed the "C" in my kid's name to a "K" because I honestly think the letter "C" looks funny
I was a former lunch lady. I had kids named Bella, Edward, Jacob and Seth all in one kindergarten class. I also had identical twins Sunshyne and Rayne. I also had another set of twin girls named Chrysanthemun and Daisy who were completely into the whole Goth style.
There's a comedian who does a funny bit about losing one of her in-laws named Coen (pronounced c**n) and having to call his name as quietly as possible in a store.
Naming conventions are different from culture to culture and change over time. Could we maybe just let people do their thing?
Didn't we honestly have a listicle like this a little less than a month ago?
Frank Zappa’s kids - Dweezil and Moon-Unit
Last I heard Dweezil was still using this name. My sister went out with him a few times. Moon-Unit just changed to Moon.
I've known both Ophelia Coxwell and Anita Crotchfelt.
https://church-of-jesus-christ-facts.net/names1/ great website for all these “unique names”
La-a. Said la-dash-a.
Around the time naming your child after the place they were conceived became fashionable, I came across a child with the middle name "Layby". I don't know if the term is used in other countries, but in the UK, a layby (or lay-by) is a stopping place for vehicles at the side of a road.
Growing up I knew 3 brothers name Adam, Hoss, and Little Joe! Guess whose dad was a Bonanza super fan? The dad even insisted he be called Ben (not his given name) WTH?
I once bought a bright pink iMac G3 at a thrift shop. Found it had loads of personal work related stuff on it (I won't go into what it was because it may be a bit too easy to trace her down). Took me some time to figure out the woman who used to own it was ACTUALLY called Barbie. I sent her an e-mail and she came over very friendly and intelligent, the computer suggested she had a well-paid job so all is well in the end. She told me her work actually accidentally got rid of her personal computer and that she was happy for me to keep it, if I could be so kind do remove the personal data (she had backups of everything important already). So I did. Seriously though. Barbie. And a pink iMac. 2021_NYR_2...5-jpeg.jpg
My question is why do people dislike the name Destiny so much? Is it cause of the video game? I’d much rather name my child Destiny than any of these names
Worst student name I've ever seen: "Nigah Brown". It was Mr. Brown for the entire school year. Seriously, how could you?!
An Associated Press report I saw June 9 says parents in Norway are picking names from the Ikea catalogue. Perfectly OK,, so Long as they're careful;. for example, the name Huvudroll certainly falls trippingly from the tongue--but it means meatballs.
Sure, why not give other kids another reason to make fun of their children.
19th Cy religious parents often used names like Faith, Hope, Charity, Prudence, Patience, and sometimes used names of Bible personages. In 20th Cy USA some black parents, possibly seeking name that would confer automatic respect, sometimes used military ranks. I have personally run across Lieutenant and Commodore. In Revolutionary Russia, some zealous Leninist parents named their children for some of the goals and/or accomplishments of the workers' Paradise. Radio and rural Electrification are among those I've found.
I have a very ordinary name, yet I mostly always have to spell it, so I am glad I didn't get any og those posted here.
And there is also North West Kardashian...
Remember sitcom How i met your mother? There was that canadian woman, Robin
Aaaand... What about people named D**k C**k? There is one Rock group, Blackbriar, and their singer is Zora C**k. Where i live,zora means twillight 😁
This is what we get when idiots reproduce ... :/
How about names based on food? I once saw a person on a reality TV show called Lasagna. She had no idea her name was dinner.
Here are the names in my school that could qualify for this list: Aleigha (Female), Leighla (Female), Kaleigha (Female), Addisyn (Female), Tegan (Male), Zephaniah (Male), Kailyn (Female), Eoghan (Male), Zoephia (Female), Solomon (Male), Maxwell (Male), Malachi (Male), Aaliyah (Male), Aayden (Male), Tierney (Male), Kael (Male), Ainsley (Female), Layne (I don't know), Leighton (I don't know), Avia-Che (Female), Ja'lil (Male), Mazlyn (Female), Boaz (Male), Da'mlre (I don't know), And plenty more 0.0. [[Edit, added comments]]
There are conditions though. I had a friend, Galina, which is a lovely name in Russia, but means chicken in my language. The nickname Kaka, in Brazil, means poop in other countries. Sometimes names just don't travel well. Siri, means penis in Georgian, and Finland has a chips brand called Megapussi, which i think means big bag, or something like that
When my third child was born the nurse told us about a couple who named their son Labia. It's pronounced lah-