How do we know our love interest really likes us? I mean, how do we know for real. This simple, yet somewhat alarming thought may break into even the tightest relationships. Because there’s always ‘what if’ and ‘what now’...

So when Twitter user @Oloni wrote: “You ever think about the men who said they liked you before and suddenly realized they actually really hated you,” it struck a chord with many. Amassing 29.8K likes, the thread quickly became a safe space to talk about hard things where people shared the exact moment they realized their love did not quite love them.

So let’s get ready to dive into the sea of real-life stories on how crushes suddenly crash, in cases ranging from cheating to those that are much more sinister.

#1

Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

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Autumn
Community Member
4 months ago

What a asshat

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#2

Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

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rspanther
Community Member
4 months ago

Revenge is sweet.

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#3

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Nannychachi
Community Member
4 months ago

Called my then-husband to take me to the hospital because I started bleeding at 3 months pregnant. His response? "Can't you call my dad to take you? I'm getting ready to go play softball." Divorced that trash and have been married to World's Best Husband for the last 18 years.

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We are all worthy of love, but in reality, most of us have survived rejection in various shapes, forms, and levels of hurt at some point in our lives. Whether it’s your partner saying they don’t love you as much as they used to, or them acting like they couldn’t care less about you, or… Well, the ways to break your heart are endless. And while some withstand the initial shock and cold shower with their head up, others take days, if not months or even years, to heal and find love again.

No wonder scientists have shown now and again that love literally hurts. Known as “stress cardiomyopathy” to the medical community, it’s better known as “broken heart syndrome,” and medical professionals don’t object to the nickname. Neuroimaging studies have shown that brain regions involved in processing physical pain overlap considerably with the areas in charge of social anguish. The connection between the two was found to be so strong that bodily painkillers turned out to successfully relieve our emotional wounds.

#4

Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

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Laura Lou
Community Member
4 months ago

This dude just sounds like a complete psycho!

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#5

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urszulat
Community Member
4 months ago

And there were no red flags beforehand?

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#6

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Jo Johannsen
Community Member
4 months ago

Normal people don't use condiments? There's an entire industrial sector down the drain.

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So in order to find out how to survive rejection and help a friend or relative who’s going through a heartbreak, we talked to Kate Mansfield, an award-winning dating coach, TV personality, writer and women’s rights activist.“ Rejection can have a profound or a mild effect, depending on the psychological state, the past trauma and the personality of the person,” Kate said and added that “at its worst, it can cause extreme feelings of worthlessness and even depression.”

Therefore, it’s not something to be taken lightly. “It can cause the person to withdraw from relationships and to stay alone. Or, to feel not good enough and low self-esteem,” Kate explained and added that those with healthy self esteem and confidence are not affected as much “because they have a solid sense of self-worth already.”

#7

Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

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K. Lange
Community Member
4 months ago

toxic

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#8

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tuzdayschild
Community Member
4 months ago

You are. He's not.

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#9

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deanna woods
Community Member
4 months ago

My parents drove all the way back home after I got in a car accident. They in another city when it happened.

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Since the pain of being rejected has direct ties with our self-esteem, Kate suggests first working on your self-esteem in order to “understand that it is nothing to do with you, it is usually not personal.”

“Try to feel grateful, because the one thing worse than being rejected is to stay in a relationship with someone who doesn’t really love you.” The dating coach added that in such cases when rejection happens on a daily basis, it causes extreme loneliness.

#10

Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

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D S
Community Member
4 months ago

Ouch!! This is so wrong on so many levels... what a selfish prick.

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#11

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denzoren
Community Member
4 months ago

I'm really sorry I laughed..it's something about the wording. I hope you ended it.

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#12

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Ember
Community Member
4 months ago

What an a-hole!

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If someone close to you is going through a heartbreak, Kate suggests being supportive and spending time with them. In extreme cases when the problem persists, it’s best to turn to coaching and counselling for help. However, “Be aware that we can only help people so much, sometimes they need to help themselves,” she added.

Most importantly, Kate concluded that “we are not rejected by others, we reject ourselves by staying in a relationship with someone who isn't really committed, or into us.”

“This self-rejection is the worst part, so have boundaries and standards for yourself. Set your standards high, don't stay for the sake of it. Taking this action will increase your self-esteem and your attraction level too,” the dating coach concluded.

#13

Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

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Kathryn Baylis
Community Member
4 months ago (edited)

And he gets all douchey like that when 100% of the attention isn’t on him.

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#14

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Ines Olabarria-Smith
Community Member
4 months ago

He was honest. He was not the man for you.

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#15

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Laura Lou
Community Member
4 months ago

Wow. There's just no words to describe how wrong this is!

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#16

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AzKhaleesi
Community Member
4 months ago

Well at least he was honest...I guess. My ex was such a narcissistic F**K that everything was EVERYONE else's fault. Didn't matter what it was, it was always someone else.

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#17

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Kathryn Baylis
Community Member
4 months ago

That “damn” was him being selfishly pissed off at the delayed/canceled booty call, because he canceled other plans with his bros for it. Nothing more. Hope you dumped him right then.

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#18

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tuzdayschild
Community Member
4 months ago

The operative word in this post is "were", as in "were married".

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#19

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Jon S.
Community Member
4 months ago

If you've never had anxiety or a panic attack it can seem like childishness to witness someone break down over a simple task, but my god the distress is so real (and we are usually perfectly aware it is also irrational).

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#20

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Kathryn Baylis
Community Member
4 months ago (edited)

Hope you dumped him, because being with him would ruin your life.

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#21

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Kathryn Baylis
Community Member
4 months ago (edited)

No one makes us do anything, unless they’re physically forcing us to. Otherwise, we CHOOSE our reactions, even if we don’t realize it. He could’ve chosen not to cheat, but instead he gave in to his impulses, then tried to project his guilt on you. You are innocent. He’s the guilty party. Hope you dumped his cheating ass.

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#22

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Jon S.
Community Member
4 months ago

I mean, if you were in the middle of an argument it might have been the best thing to do. You cannot expect someone to switch from defensive to supportive because of tears. The most you can expect is that with reflection they see how important the issue is to you.

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#23

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denzoren
Community Member
4 months ago

What a horrible thing to say.

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#24

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Trillian
Community Member
4 months ago

Shouldn't it be surprising that HE is still alive after that day (assuming he is)?

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#25

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Kathryn Baylis
Community Member
4 months ago (edited)

I’m 60, and discovered decades ago that some adults are so childish—-rude, impulsive, selfish, and totally lacking in critical thinking skills, empathy, and a filter between their brains and their mouths—-that they DO need to be told to be nice to others. Sometimes they’re so devoid of even the most basic social skills that they actually need to be taught HOW to be nice to others, as well. We need to do a better job raising our children, folks, so this population of sociopaths decreases instead of increases.

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#26

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deanna woods
Community Member
4 months ago

That is sociopathic behavior to get enjoyment out of someone crying.

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#27

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Aunt Messy
Community Member
4 months ago

Drive away in your new car and don't look back. Let him abuse his new fuckpuppet.

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#28

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Jelly the Bean
Community Member
4 months ago

Oh no no no this is awful!

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#29

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denzoren
Community Member
4 months ago

Guys like this are usually all in for an open relationship but would start crying if the woman was getting more attention.

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#30

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Kathryn Baylis
Community Member
4 months ago (edited)

“Best friend”, my ass. Leave him to her. He’ll soon learn the grass isn’t always greener somewhere else. It happened to me a couple times when I was single. They both came running back pretty quickly, knocking on my door, and begging me to forgive them and to take them back. They both got my door slammed in their faces, and I couldn’t give a s**t just how long they stood there before it dawned on them that they weren’t going to be let in my house, that they pissed on—-and lost—-the affection of a much better person than the ones they left me for, and it was all their own stupid horndog fault.

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