Women Share What Made Them Realize Their Boyfriend Or Husband Didn’t Even Like Them (30 Tweets)
How do we know our love interest really likes us? I mean, how do we know for real. This simple, yet somewhat alarming thought may break into even the tightest relationships. Because there’s always ‘what if’ and ‘what now’...
So when Twitter user @Oloni wrote: “You ever think about the men who said they liked you before and suddenly realized they actually really hated you,” it struck a chord with many. Amassing 29.8K likes, the thread quickly became a safe space to talk about hard things where people shared the exact moment they realized their love did not quite love them.
So let’s get ready to dive into the sea of real-life stories on how crushes suddenly crash, in cases ranging from cheating to those that are much more sinister.
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Called my then-husband to take me to the hospital because I started bleeding at 3 months pregnant. His response? "Can't you call my dad to take you? I'm getting ready to go play softball." Divorced that trash and have been married to World's Best Husband for the last 18 years.
We are all worthy of love, but in reality, most of us have survived rejection in various shapes, forms, and levels of hurt at some point in our lives. Whether it’s your partner saying they don’t love you as much as they used to, or them acting like they couldn’t care less about you, or… Well, the ways to break your heart are endless. And while some withstand the initial shock and cold shower with their head up, others take days, if not months or even years, to heal and find love again.
No wonder scientists have shown now and again that love literally hurts. Known as “stress cardiomyopathy” to the medical community, it’s better known as “broken heart syndrome,” and medical professionals don’t object to the nickname. Neuroimaging studies have shown that brain regions involved in processing physical pain overlap considerably with the areas in charge of social anguish. The connection between the two was found to be so strong that bodily painkillers turned out to successfully relieve our emotional wounds.
We're pretty good to not see the red flags when we care for people. I had a huge epiphany about a "friend" 4 years ago, since then, I realised, there were dozen of red flags before that. I just minimized each of them, because he was my friend... spoiler alert, he's not my friend anymore, I'm not sure he ever was....
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Sounds just like my husband, he has only seen me cry once and he said that, they are repeating what their father's said to their mothers, show what a s**t life their mother's had.
Yup, mine told me to keep it down during contractions , other people would hear me, while giving birth to our first baby!
Anyone who pulls crap like this while their partner is pregnant should have to wear a pregnancy simulator.
I would very firmly grasp his manhood and squeeze the daylights out of it with every contraction
My ex used to say, "Oh, there she goes, crying again." This would be after a disagreement, during which he emotionally and verbally beat me down.
**cue nurse kicking him in the family jewels every time she has a contraction...
This I think stems from what he heard growing up, the attitude his father had to his mother. My husband did something similar to me, which was totally wrong, I knew then he was just being his father, said what a horrible life his mother must have had and if he could not say things out of his own mind then to shut up.
You should've stabbed him with a scalpel and tell him to walk the imaginary pain off.
Normal people don't use condiments? There's an entire industrial sector down the drain.
So in order to find out how to survive rejection and help a friend or relative who’s going through a heartbreak, we talked to Kate Mansfield, an award-winning dating coach, TV personality, writer and women’s rights activist.“ Rejection can have a profound or a mild effect, depending on the psychological state, the past trauma and the personality of the person,” Kate said and added that “at its worst, it can cause extreme feelings of worthlessness and even depression.”
Therefore, it’s not something to be taken lightly. “It can cause the person to withdraw from relationships and to stay alone. Or, to feel not good enough and low self-esteem,” Kate explained and added that those with healthy self esteem and confidence are not affected as much “because they have a solid sense of self-worth already.”
My parents drove all the way back home after I got in a car accident. They in another city when it happened.
Since the pain of being rejected has direct ties with our self-esteem, Kate suggests first working on your self-esteem in order to “understand that it is nothing to do with you, it is usually not personal.”
“Try to feel grateful, because the one thing worse than being rejected is to stay in a relationship with someone who doesn’t really love you.” The dating coach added that in such cases when rejection happens on a daily basis, it causes extreme loneliness.
If someone close to you is going through a heartbreak, Kate suggests being supportive and spending time with them. In extreme cases when the problem persists, it’s best to turn to coaching and counselling for help. However, “Be aware that we can only help people so much, sometimes they need to help themselves,” she added.
Most importantly, Kate concluded that “we are not rejected by others, we reject ourselves by staying in a relationship with someone who isn't really committed, or into us.”
“This self-rejection is the worst part, so have boundaries and standards for yourself. Set your standards high, don't stay for the sake of it. Taking this action will increase your self-esteem and your attraction level too,” the dating coach concluded.
And he gets all douchey like that when 100% of the attention isn’t on him.
Well at least he was honest...I guess. My ex was such a narcissistic F**K that everything was EVERYONE else's fault. Didn't matter what it was, it was always someone else.
That “damn” was him being selfishly pissed off at the delayed/canceled booty call, because he canceled other plans with his bros for it. Nothing more. Hope you dumped him right then.
Hope you dumped him, because being with him would ruin your life.
No one makes us do anything, unless they’re physically forcing us to. Otherwise, we CHOOSE our reactions, even if we don’t realize it. He could’ve chosen not to cheat, but instead he gave in to his impulses, then tried to project his guilt on you. You are innocent. He’s the guilty party. Hope you dumped his cheating ass.
I’m 60, and discovered decades ago that some adults are so childish—-rude, impulsive, selfish, and totally lacking in critical thinking skills, empathy, and a filter between their brains and their mouths—-that they DO need to be told to be nice to others. Sometimes they’re so devoid of even the most basic social skills that they actually need to be taught HOW to be nice to others, as well. We need to do a better job raising our children, folks, so this population of sociopaths decreases instead of increases.
Drive away in your new car and don't look back. Let him abuse his new fuckpuppet.
“Best friend”, my ass. Leave him to her. He’ll soon learn the grass isn’t always greener somewhere else. It happened to me a couple times when I was single. They both came running back pretty quickly, knocking on my door, and begging me to forgive them and to take them back. They both got my door slammed in their faces, and I couldn’t give a s**t just how long they stood there before it dawned on them that they weren’t going to be let in my house, that they pissed on—-and lost—-the affection of a much better person than the ones they left me for, and it was all their own stupid horndog fault.
I know some commenters are going to work themselves into a lather over this, but I don’t care. If it was me, and I was in med school, got pregnant, and the douche I was dating said something like that to me, I would have an abortion. I would not want his child, definitely would not want anything that would obligate me to have anything to do with him ever again. He would be totally cut out of my life. I would wait to have a child with someone wonderful who would be totally worth the wait.
My reply would’ve been, “then I hope you and League will be very happy together, and you’re now officially an incel”.
I think they call that “negging” these days. I don’t know why people still do it. I’m 60, and it didn’t work when I was young, it didn’t work when my mother was young, so it isn’t going to work now, and still won’t work in the future. Time to flush that tactic down the shitter where it belongs. Have a f*****g funeral for it. Get rid of it. Once and for all.
This guy sounds like a real sociopath and I hope you got away from him.
No dear, that’s not the French word for what you’re thinking.
One of my coworker's sisters was married to a military guy that was such a scum bucket that he expected his wife to give him sex the day after she came home from giving birth to his son. She refused. A few weeks later, he was caught sneaking in through the bedroom window of a neighborhood girl (15 y.o.) and attempting to rape her. He was arrested, dishonorably discharged, convicted and sent to federal jail for 15 years. She divorced him and filed for sole custody of their son. She also has a restraining order against him and his family which she renews each year. And if that doesn't shock you enough...dude thought he could get away with all of this knowing that his father-in-law was a deputy warden at the local men's prison......
Me too, few if any leave us anything to upvote, not even a bucket of icewater over their head, nothin'....
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These made me think about an ex, we were together 1.5 years when my grandpa passed away. I called him crying and he told me he can't handle that crying sh×t and hung up. A week later, I was on a business trip 1000 miles away and he calls to tell me that he's actually still with his baby mama and been using me for my money this whole time, and she was in on it. I get home from the trip, my car battery is dead because he left the lights on, he also lost the keys and there was period blood on the passenger seat. To top it all off, when I confronted him in person, somehow he got my work credit card and racked up $5K. I didn't notice it missing until I rec'd an email that I was over my limit. I was fired from the job I had for almost 15 years because of him.
You and your work couldn't file a stolen card report with the credit card company and contact the police to have him arrested?
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I can't for the life of me understand why some people (not gonna say men because women are just as scummy) act like this. Like who the eff raised you???? Were you not brestfed as a child? Were you not hugged enough? what? What could possibly cause you to treat another human being like that? I just can't.
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So some of you think these stories are bs? I've been around long enough to know better. I used to run a bar and the crap that came out of men's mouths was absolutely disgusting. Sure I heard some awful things come out of women's mouths too but no where near the men when they'd had a few glasses of guts
That is very true. I also worked in a bar and men are pigs. Yes, as you said women can be quite s**t mouthed too, but men are straight up disgusting, it is like a competition.. the more they drink the more vile they become. At least in a group of women, there is usually the foul mouthed one or two and the rest are there to laugh.... but in the women groups, it's not a competition on how much of a pig you can be.
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These were painful to read. I was married to a man who hated me for 12 years. Physically and emotionally abusive. Spent more time with his family and hookers than me. I finally asked for a divorce and he said “iIf that’s what you really want .” Took years to realize he was a self absorbed asshole and I was fine. I never deserved to be treated with contempt. I’ve become hardened, but will never let anyone make me feel insignificant again. Single 22 years. Strong and very independent. And proud I’ve come this far.
Single, strong and independent is also an awesome status 👏🥳.
Load More Replies... He told my sister when he would propose. She spilled the beans and I told him I needed to clarify my feelings before I got married. Shortly after, my dad was hospitalized and I called him for support. He was like... "Why are you calling me? We r taking a break for your "clarity". Rely on someone else... And I am not taking you to see the play (the proposal place)!" My dad lived, but had open heart surgery. He never checked to see if he was OK. Got my clarity!
A few years ago, a man I was seeing briefly, once said his friends were in a pub down the road and wants us to meet them now. I'm autistic, which he knew and told him I need to have some time to prepare myself, I can't just immediately up and go. He said "you really need to change your attitude Amina, everyone around you will get sick of your pathetic bullshit and will leave you forever; no one will want to be around you.
Another time, my boyfriend of five years and I stayed in a fancy hotel for the weekend as a last ditch attempt at saving our relationship. When we'd only been together a few months, I had a kidney removed which left me with a lot of nerve damage. It’s excruciating and I collapse several times a day but all I can do is lie in a ball on the floor crying and wait for it to stop. We checked in, went to our room (bear in mind I’d been driving for a few hours which was painful anyway) and while unpacking got a bit frisky. We were standing up kissing and all of a sudden I fell to the floor in agony. Again, all I could do was cry and wait. The very first thing he said when I collapsed was “Welp, that obviously means no sex all weekend.” And sulked for hours. We broke up shortly after that.
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This really made me think too much about my last relationship. I didn't think it was that bad at the time, but yea... I guess it was.
It just seems like we have a lot of douchey people in this world. If you are one of those types that loves to hurt other people to make yourself feel better, you need psychiatric help. Saying horrible things to people or not showing empathy are clear signs that you are narcissistic. Getting mad about someone expressing their emotions makes you a scumbag.
I think it was after years of gaslighting from my husband of 12 years who always told me my friends (and strangers) didn't like me. When I confronted him about it and said, "People like me. YOU'RE the one who doesn't like me." He replied, "They don't know you like I do."
Load More Replies... Sister in-law's partner decided to have hemaroid surgery a couple of days before her due date. He had her running up & down stairs all day long. She was pregnant with their 4th child. She drove herself to the hospital when she went into in labor. Dude calls her after baby's birth to complain about his pain and how he had to take care of himself. Didn't ask how she was, how birth was, how baby was, not even sex of baby. She decided that was it and left his ass a month later.
How awful, it makes me wonder how horrible he was with the rest of the years she gave to him. I am glad she finally left him.
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my ex-husband told me when I was pregnant with our last child that he got sick of being turned down for sex so he went to a hooker. He told me this a few days after I gave birth and turned him down for sex.He also said it was 'my' baby.
Never tell your child that he said that, not until they are emotionally mature to understand that it is not 'their' fault. Both my sons, to my first partner believed with all their hearts that their dad loved them very much.. I even bought and wrapped gifts from their "dad" when they were growing up. They are now 15 and 18 and know the truth and were surprised, but emotionally old enough to be able to understand the truth. They are amazing kids I am so lucky and they love their muma and have thanked me for allowing them to think their dad loved them even though he didn't care.
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My ex complained that I wasn't spending time with him -- while our 5 year old was in the hospital recovering from a 9 hour surgery. Silly me, I thought the 5 year old was the priority
I had a toxic and manipulative boyfriend once. Sometimes he kept saying that he was too busy to meet up because he needed to study, but later I found out that he was hanging with one of his exes instead of studying. Then he was invited to a wedding and took another one of his exes as a plus one, not me... When I told him that these things hurted me, he said that I'm imagining things and overreacting. After being together for one year, he applied for a summer job in the USA (we are from Europe) and he told me "Babe, you are the love of my life, and I want to marry you and stuff, but I'd like to have a break for the summer, so I can sleep with a bunch of chicks in the states. You have to understand that I need this, I can't just not sleep with anyone for 3 months..." I dumped his ass. When he came back in September, he tried to weasel his way back, but finally I was smart enough not to forgive him again.
So, this is exactly what I’m talking about in my comment below. You knew he’s screwing around and you still wanted to be his girlfriend? Why didn’t you break it off the first time you found out about the way he was? Women want to be with guys until they don’t. And when they don’t they then write blog posts/social media posts about it. You need to dump a guy as soon as anything happens. If you don’t he won’t learn, and you will be destined to repeat the same thing with future guys. I’ve seen it over and over and over. And read about it over and over in posts like this.
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Thank you for sharing...even though it is painfull....You gave me courage to do smth with my own life instead of sitting on my ass, crying, starving and self harming myself. It is never too late
Put your energy and love into yourself and your life, it is never wasted there 😍
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My douche bag x-boyfriend and I dated for 4 1/2 years and lived together. One day I came home from a job I just started. He told me he believed our journey had come to an end and we needed a fresh start and then kicked me out of his place. He knew I had nowhere to go that fast and late at night. I got over it, became a better person, and know I deserve better. I usually seem to attract losers. I am now a happily married newlywed. I had a major accident at work. I'm not allowed to bend, lift, or twist. And my husband has been amazing!! He works (a lot), takes me to my appointments, does the laundry, shopping, and cleaning. He doesn't complain and still lovingly to me. I've been out of work since June 17th. It only took dating the wrong men and 40 plus years, but I finally found a good man
We had been dating for 5 years.. He was working for my father's company there's company living in my house rent free and driving my father's company truck for free.. A mutual friend of ours was having a party and he told me I couldn't go cause it was just a guy's night so that night I went to My Parent's house and talked to them about my relationship with him and how I might be able to fix it we're about to fix it. Come to find out I wasn't allowed to go to the party Because the girl he had been cheating on me with for the past 6 months was there and he was having sex with her at the very moment I was discussing a relationship with my parents.. When my dad had a talk with him he said to my father " I've tried really hard in the past 3 months to make things work and nothing has changed" My dad told him "If you think 3 months is trying to compared to the rest of your life you need to get the hell away from my daughter." He lost his girlfriend, his housing, his job and his truck that day
I had a suicide attempt (on tablets) and he was talking to keep me awake. As the drugs took affect he got tired, then he asked why I didn't hang myself as it would have been quicker.
Ummm, yeah there are guys who are a**holes for sure. There are also plenty of women who are a**holes. I know plenty of women who have mistreated their mates, turned their children against them, then completely ruined them financially because the courts tend to side with the women. Maybe they should get equal time here.
Yes my current partner was knocked out cold by his ex with a cast iron frypan because he remarked that Diane Lane was still hot.
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This is not so much of a “didn’t like me” issue as a “too self-absorbed” issue, but my ex-husband is an ex for a reason. There were a lot of things but the nail in the coffin of that marriage was when he got jealous because I was spending a lot of time with my parents. My father was dying from ALS. Mom still had to work part time on overnights so I would stay there while she was working and on one of her days off so she could get some rest herself. I provided hands-on care for Dad - bathing, feeding, changing his catheter, cleaning the pressure wound he got from his c-pap machine - that’s hard work on its own made doubly hard because Dad had absolutely thrived on being independent. I also had a full-time job caring for residents in group homes. I would come home to my ex whining about being bored for the few days I was away and that he wanted to go do something fun. Never asked how I was or whether I needed anything and couldn’t comprehend why I was so exhausted.
I'd like to read about the reverse too: men realized partners hate them. And why is it always only straight couples? I'm sure any partnership can be toxic.
I can attest that even LGBTQIA+ relationships can be toxic. Wasted 7 years of my life on one. Really glad that I got out of that one.
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We were walking, and this louche-looking man leered at me--I was pretty sure it had some machismo thing to do with my boyfriend, and not me. Anyway, when I told him that I'd been leered at, he said, "what do you want me to do? congratulate you?" Then he also told me that I didn't always mean it when I told him I loved him--I was just saying it to make him tell me he loved me. That was the end of our relationship.
To be fair, what's the flip side? Guys, when you find out your girl/wife hated you?
Valid question, but how about you start that conversation somewhere other than the comment section on an existing article? Get the answers and then post it to BP. I'd be happy to read it.
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In younger years, I was dating a guy I thought I would marry (we'd talked about it). Then found out he'd been cheating on me. When confronted, he said "I like her but I love you". So we broke up and I don't think he even dated that girl.
Had too many of these... I have been with wrong persons all my life. Sometimes, it's better to just be alone.
You can be nice in the relationship just not too nice, don't offer too often to help/do/pay anything for him. A man would know after 6 month if they wanna marry you or not, don't stay longer than 3 years if he has not mention anything about kids or marriage or even he gave you an engagement ring don't stay more than a year, unless both of you are planning/already paid for the wedding. After a year he still not marry you then you should call it off and keep it moving. If a man want to marry you he don't want to wait to call you his wife.
Why is a government issued piece of paper necessary for a long-term relationship?
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They may be and they may be not. There is insufficient information to make a conclusion.
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I hope all these ladies kicked these ugly men to the curb and farther
Well, they stick around till the better one comes along literally. And then do the same and move along with the next one.
I'm sure some of them *did* realize before but even then, it's hard to break up an abusive or unhealthy relationship. A lot of these might have just been the last straw for them to realize they needed to get out.
Load More Replies... I seriously hope that whenever there's a creating bf/gf, that those bad eggs end up together and make each other miserable, just like they did with their good loyal s/o's.
I use to text my ex everyday just a simple text just to greet him and wishing him a good day at work and that I love him. I would never get a response, which I thought was "normal" at the time (I was not provided examples of what a healthy relationship is at the time). One day, after my greeting, he texted me back saying f*** off. Why I didn't just dump his ass on that day is mind boggling to me. AND a few months later, this asshat breaks up with me via text message.
About 12yrs ago I was in an abusive relationahip. After a petty argument over something really stupid, like why there was a dirty fork in the sink(after dinner) he choked me to the point of almost unconsciousness and threw me into a couple walls. I went into full panic attack and was hyperventilating (thankfully) he stopped and I reached out for his arm just to try and calm myself down for a moment. from the pain and crying he told "bitch stop this bullshit, Noone cries THIS hard & gasps for air when having a panic attack, stop overreacting. You didn't even lose consciousness" within a short time frame afterward that fight I was gone for good. Some men truly don't understand the damage they can do to their partner. Through words. Actions., whatever it may be. If you don't have true feeling for them please, do not get into a relationship just to put the other down
I hope you filed a police report. I''m so sorry this happened to you.
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I should have realized when my then-fiance wanted to play Monty Python's Look on the Bright Side of Life as we were walking down the aisle at the wedding. It starts out with, "Some things in life are bad...They can really make you mad...Other things just make you swear and curse...When you're chewing on life's gristle...Don't grumble, give a whistle"
I'm absolutely amazed that ANY of these stayed another minute with these guys. Ladies!! Seriously!!!
Lots of vagueness in these posts. Also, it’s pretty easy to tell when someone doesn’t like you. Actually REALLY easy. The fact that people stay in relationships with people that don’t like them tells me that they aren’t a good judge of character. Might be a little more difficult to tell if someone loves you for real or not, but easy to tell if they like you or not. People tend to stay in relationship, even if they’re bad ones, because they are afraid of not being in a relationship. This toxic behavior needs to stop for everyone. People need to start thinking with their heads instead of their hearts all the time.
It sounds kinda like you're blaming them. There are many factors that make people stay with someone, and some of those factors are because of your family background growing up. If you were dealt bad cards to start with, it's hard to do things differently, because you've never experienced that.
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IF ANY of these women are still with the men they deserve no sympathy.
I read 3 of these and quit, we want to be equals then act stupid like we don't know what's going on. Get your s**t together ladies! He treated you like s**t before the baby was born, you had a red flag on the first date. People suck in general, men are crazy and women are crazy, don't victimize yourself, be better. We're smarter than that. I know I'll get hate for it but seriously, stop playing dumb.
Sad stories. But please note that also guys can fall victim of toxic relationships. Maybe less talked about, but nonetheless true.Abuse can come from all sides and all genders. Plus: if you hear a victim story, you might actually be talking to the one that abuses. Verify before jumping to conclusions.
Parents, raise your men to respect women. Ladies if they don't respect you get out. Don't have kids with them, don't marry them.
*Parents, raise your children to respect people.
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One day I'm hoping to hear the other side of these sorts of stories. Some of them are... definitely in need of a backstory and the other side of things.
You want to know the other side of “me and my side chick were using you for money”? Hmm
Load More Replies... I'm trying to have some sympathy for these women but I can't mainly because they are STUPID. ALL of these signs were evident early in the relationship, yet they continued in the relationship. I dated a guy for about a year and finally woke up when he refused to attend a wedding of my friend after I had attended FOUR of his friend's weddings, plus countless showers and spending my time buying the wedding presents (he did reimburse me, but only after asking numerous times). I would rather be alone, than waste my time on a boyfriend/husband who treated me poorly. But I suspect all of these women wanted to live a 'good' life supplied by the man. I once asked a girlfriend why she hadn't divorced her husband who had cheated on her many times - her response was "then I would have to live like you! - meaning a small house (that was mine), only one vacation each year (which was fully paid for) and a new car maybe every 10 years rather than every other year.
So is Bored Panda going to make one of these lists for times that men realized that their wives hated them? Though I'm betting that if they made that list they would still twist it to blame the guy for the wife hating them.
I don't think you realize how incredibly hard it can be.
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It's their fault they were treated like s**t?? Check your misogyny.
Load More Replies... One of my coworker's sisters was married to a military guy that was such a scum bucket that he expected his wife to give him sex the day after she came home from giving birth to his son. She refused. A few weeks later, he was caught sneaking in through the bedroom window of a neighborhood girl (15 y.o.) and attempting to rape her. He was arrested, dishonorably discharged, convicted and sent to federal jail for 15 years. She divorced him and filed for sole custody of their son. She also has a restraining order against him and his family which she renews each year. And if that doesn't shock you enough...dude thought he could get away with all of this knowing that his father-in-law was a deputy warden at the local men's prison......
Me too, few if any leave us anything to upvote, not even a bucket of icewater over their head, nothin'....
Load More Replies... These made me think about an ex, we were together 1.5 years when my grandpa passed away. I called him crying and he told me he can't handle that crying sh×t and hung up. A week later, I was on a business trip 1000 miles away and he calls to tell me that he's actually still with his baby mama and been using me for my money this whole time, and she was in on it. I get home from the trip, my car battery is dead because he left the lights on, he also lost the keys and there was period blood on the passenger seat. To top it all off, when I confronted him in person, somehow he got my work credit card and racked up $5K. I didn't notice it missing until I rec'd an email that I was over my limit. I was fired from the job I had for almost 15 years because of him.
You and your work couldn't file a stolen card report with the credit card company and contact the police to have him arrested?
Load More Replies... I can't for the life of me understand why some people (not gonna say men because women are just as scummy) act like this. Like who the eff raised you???? Were you not brestfed as a child? Were you not hugged enough? what? What could possibly cause you to treat another human being like that? I just can't.
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Load More Replies... So some of you think these stories are bs? I've been around long enough to know better. I used to run a bar and the crap that came out of men's mouths was absolutely disgusting. Sure I heard some awful things come out of women's mouths too but no where near the men when they'd had a few glasses of guts
That is very true. I also worked in a bar and men are pigs. Yes, as you said women can be quite s**t mouthed too, but men are straight up disgusting, it is like a competition.. the more they drink the more vile they become. At least in a group of women, there is usually the foul mouthed one or two and the rest are there to laugh.... but in the women groups, it's not a competition on how much of a pig you can be.
Load More Replies... These were painful to read. I was married to a man who hated me for 12 years. Physically and emotionally abusive. Spent more time with his family and hookers than me. I finally asked for a divorce and he said “iIf that’s what you really want .” Took years to realize he was a self absorbed asshole and I was fine. I never deserved to be treated with contempt. I’ve become hardened, but will never let anyone make me feel insignificant again. Single 22 years. Strong and very independent. And proud I’ve come this far.
Single, strong and independent is also an awesome status 👏🥳.
Load More Replies... He told my sister when he would propose. She spilled the beans and I told him I needed to clarify my feelings before I got married. Shortly after, my dad was hospitalized and I called him for support. He was like... "Why are you calling me? We r taking a break for your "clarity". Rely on someone else... And I am not taking you to see the play (the proposal place)!" My dad lived, but had open heart surgery. He never checked to see if he was OK. Got my clarity!
A few years ago, a man I was seeing briefly, once said his friends were in a pub down the road and wants us to meet them now. I'm autistic, which he knew and told him I need to have some time to prepare myself, I can't just immediately up and go. He said "you really need to change your attitude Amina, everyone around you will get sick of your pathetic bullshit and will leave you forever; no one will want to be around you.
Another time, my boyfriend of five years and I stayed in a fancy hotel for the weekend as a last ditch attempt at saving our relationship. When we'd only been together a few months, I had a kidney removed which left me with a lot of nerve damage. It’s excruciating and I collapse several times a day but all I can do is lie in a ball on the floor crying and wait for it to stop. We checked in, went to our room (bear in mind I’d been driving for a few hours which was painful anyway) and while unpacking got a bit frisky. We were standing up kissing and all of a sudden I fell to the floor in agony. Again, all I could do was cry and wait. The very first thing he said when I collapsed was “Welp, that obviously means no sex all weekend.” And sulked for hours. We broke up shortly after that.
Load More Replies... This really made me think too much about my last relationship. I didn't think it was that bad at the time, but yea... I guess it was.
It just seems like we have a lot of douchey people in this world. If you are one of those types that loves to hurt other people to make yourself feel better, you need psychiatric help. Saying horrible things to people or not showing empathy are clear signs that you are narcissistic. Getting mad about someone expressing their emotions makes you a scumbag.
I think it was after years of gaslighting from my husband of 12 years who always told me my friends (and strangers) didn't like me. When I confronted him about it and said, "People like me. YOU'RE the one who doesn't like me." He replied, "They don't know you like I do."
Load More Replies... Sister in-law's partner decided to have hemaroid surgery a couple of days before her due date. He had her running up & down stairs all day long. She was pregnant with their 4th child. She drove herself to the hospital when she went into in labor. Dude calls her after baby's birth to complain about his pain and how he had to take care of himself. Didn't ask how she was, how birth was, how baby was, not even sex of baby. She decided that was it and left his ass a month later.
How awful, it makes me wonder how horrible he was with the rest of the years she gave to him. I am glad she finally left him.
Load More Replies... my ex-husband told me when I was pregnant with our last child that he got sick of being turned down for sex so he went to a hooker. He told me this a few days after I gave birth and turned him down for sex.He also said it was 'my' baby.
Never tell your child that he said that, not until they are emotionally mature to understand that it is not 'their' fault. Both my sons, to my first partner believed with all their hearts that their dad loved them very much.. I even bought and wrapped gifts from their "dad" when they were growing up. They are now 15 and 18 and know the truth and were surprised, but emotionally old enough to be able to understand the truth. They are amazing kids I am so lucky and they love their muma and have thanked me for allowing them to think their dad loved them even though he didn't care.
Load More Replies... My ex complained that I wasn't spending time with him -- while our 5 year old was in the hospital recovering from a 9 hour surgery. Silly me, I thought the 5 year old was the priority
I had a toxic and manipulative boyfriend once. Sometimes he kept saying that he was too busy to meet up because he needed to study, but later I found out that he was hanging with one of his exes instead of studying. Then he was invited to a wedding and took another one of his exes as a plus one, not me... When I told him that these things hurted me, he said that I'm imagining things and overreacting. After being together for one year, he applied for a summer job in the USA (we are from Europe) and he told me "Babe, you are the love of my life, and I want to marry you and stuff, but I'd like to have a break for the summer, so I can sleep with a bunch of chicks in the states. You have to understand that I need this, I can't just not sleep with anyone for 3 months..." I dumped his ass. When he came back in September, he tried to weasel his way back, but finally I was smart enough not to forgive him again.
So, this is exactly what I’m talking about in my comment below. You knew he’s screwing around and you still wanted to be his girlfriend? Why didn’t you break it off the first time you found out about the way he was? Women want to be with guys until they don’t. And when they don’t they then write blog posts/social media posts about it. You need to dump a guy as soon as anything happens. If you don’t he won’t learn, and you will be destined to repeat the same thing with future guys. I’ve seen it over and over and over. And read about it over and over in posts like this.
Load More Replies... Thank you for sharing...even though it is painfull....You gave me courage to do smth with my own life instead of sitting on my ass, crying, starving and self harming myself. It is never too late
Put your energy and love into yourself and your life, it is never wasted there 😍
Load More Replies... My douche bag x-boyfriend and I dated for 4 1/2 years and lived together. One day I came home from a job I just started. He told me he believed our journey had come to an end and we needed a fresh start and then kicked me out of his place. He knew I had nowhere to go that fast and late at night. I got over it, became a better person, and know I deserve better. I usually seem to attract losers. I am now a happily married newlywed. I had a major accident at work. I'm not allowed to bend, lift, or twist. And my husband has been amazing!! He works (a lot), takes me to my appointments, does the laundry, shopping, and cleaning. He doesn't complain and still lovingly to me. I've been out of work since June 17th. It only took dating the wrong men and 40 plus years, but I finally found a good man
We had been dating for 5 years.. He was working for my father's company there's company living in my house rent free and driving my father's company truck for free.. A mutual friend of ours was having a party and he told me I couldn't go cause it was just a guy's night so that night I went to My Parent's house and talked to them about my relationship with him and how I might be able to fix it we're about to fix it. Come to find out I wasn't allowed to go to the party Because the girl he had been cheating on me with for the past 6 months was there and he was having sex with her at the very moment I was discussing a relationship with my parents.. When my dad had a talk with him he said to my father " I've tried really hard in the past 3 months to make things work and nothing has changed" My dad told him "If you think 3 months is trying to compared to the rest of your life you need to get the hell away from my daughter." He lost his girlfriend, his housing, his job and his truck that day
I had a suicide attempt (on tablets) and he was talking to keep me awake. As the drugs took affect he got tired, then he asked why I didn't hang myself as it would have been quicker.
Ummm, yeah there are guys who are a**holes for sure. There are also plenty of women who are a**holes. I know plenty of women who have mistreated their mates, turned their children against them, then completely ruined them financially because the courts tend to side with the women. Maybe they should get equal time here.
Yes my current partner was knocked out cold by his ex with a cast iron frypan because he remarked that Diane Lane was still hot.
Load More Replies... This is not so much of a “didn’t like me” issue as a “too self-absorbed” issue, but my ex-husband is an ex for a reason. There were a lot of things but the nail in the coffin of that marriage was when he got jealous because I was spending a lot of time with my parents. My father was dying from ALS. Mom still had to work part time on overnights so I would stay there while she was working and on one of her days off so she could get some rest herself. I provided hands-on care for Dad - bathing, feeding, changing his catheter, cleaning the pressure wound he got from his c-pap machine - that’s hard work on its own made doubly hard because Dad had absolutely thrived on being independent. I also had a full-time job caring for residents in group homes. I would come home to my ex whining about being bored for the few days I was away and that he wanted to go do something fun. Never asked how I was or whether I needed anything and couldn’t comprehend why I was so exhausted.
I'd like to read about the reverse too: men realized partners hate them. And why is it always only straight couples? I'm sure any partnership can be toxic.
I can attest that even LGBTQIA+ relationships can be toxic. Wasted 7 years of my life on one. Really glad that I got out of that one.
Load More Replies... We were walking, and this louche-looking man leered at me--I was pretty sure it had some machismo thing to do with my boyfriend, and not me. Anyway, when I told him that I'd been leered at, he said, "what do you want me to do? congratulate you?" Then he also told me that I didn't always mean it when I told him I loved him--I was just saying it to make him tell me he loved me. That was the end of our relationship.
To be fair, what's the flip side? Guys, when you find out your girl/wife hated you?
Valid question, but how about you start that conversation somewhere other than the comment section on an existing article? Get the answers and then post it to BP. I'd be happy to read it.
Load More Replies... In younger years, I was dating a guy I thought I would marry (we'd talked about it). Then found out he'd been cheating on me. When confronted, he said "I like her but I love you". So we broke up and I don't think he even dated that girl.
Had too many of these... I have been with wrong persons all my life. Sometimes, it's better to just be alone.
You can be nice in the relationship just not too nice, don't offer too often to help/do/pay anything for him. A man would know after 6 month if they wanna marry you or not, don't stay longer than 3 years if he has not mention anything about kids or marriage or even he gave you an engagement ring don't stay more than a year, unless both of you are planning/already paid for the wedding. After a year he still not marry you then you should call it off and keep it moving. If a man want to marry you he don't want to wait to call you his wife.
Why is a government issued piece of paper necessary for a long-term relationship?
Load More Replies... They may be and they may be not. There is insufficient information to make a conclusion.
Load More Replies... I hope all these ladies kicked these ugly men to the curb and farther
Well, they stick around till the better one comes along literally. And then do the same and move along with the next one.
I'm sure some of them *did* realize before but even then, it's hard to break up an abusive or unhealthy relationship. A lot of these might have just been the last straw for them to realize they needed to get out.
Load More Replies... I seriously hope that whenever there's a creating bf/gf, that those bad eggs end up together and make each other miserable, just like they did with their good loyal s/o's.
I use to text my ex everyday just a simple text just to greet him and wishing him a good day at work and that I love him. I would never get a response, which I thought was "normal" at the time (I was not provided examples of what a healthy relationship is at the time). One day, after my greeting, he texted me back saying f*** off. Why I didn't just dump his ass on that day is mind boggling to me. AND a few months later, this asshat breaks up with me via text message.
About 12yrs ago I was in an abusive relationahip. After a petty argument over something really stupid, like why there was a dirty fork in the sink(after dinner) he choked me to the point of almost unconsciousness and threw me into a couple walls. I went into full panic attack and was hyperventilating (thankfully) he stopped and I reached out for his arm just to try and calm myself down for a moment. from the pain and crying he told "bitch stop this bullshit, Noone cries THIS hard & gasps for air when having a panic attack, stop overreacting. You didn't even lose consciousness" within a short time frame afterward that fight I was gone for good. Some men truly don't understand the damage they can do to their partner. Through words. Actions., whatever it may be. If you don't have true feeling for them please, do not get into a relationship just to put the other down
I hope you filed a police report. I''m so sorry this happened to you.
Load More Replies... I should have realized when my then-fiance wanted to play Monty Python's Look on the Bright Side of Life as we were walking down the aisle at the wedding. It starts out with, "Some things in life are bad...They can really make you mad...Other things just make you swear and curse...When you're chewing on life's gristle...Don't grumble, give a whistle"
I'm absolutely amazed that ANY of these stayed another minute with these guys. Ladies!! Seriously!!!
Lots of vagueness in these posts. Also, it’s pretty easy to tell when someone doesn’t like you. Actually REALLY easy. The fact that people stay in relationships with people that don’t like them tells me that they aren’t a good judge of character. Might be a little more difficult to tell if someone loves you for real or not, but easy to tell if they like you or not. People tend to stay in relationship, even if they’re bad ones, because they are afraid of not being in a relationship. This toxic behavior needs to stop for everyone. People need to start thinking with their heads instead of their hearts all the time.
It sounds kinda like you're blaming them. There are many factors that make people stay with someone, and some of those factors are because of your family background growing up. If you were dealt bad cards to start with, it's hard to do things differently, because you've never experienced that.
Load More Replies... IF ANY of these women are still with the men they deserve no sympathy.
I read 3 of these and quit, we want to be equals then act stupid like we don't know what's going on. Get your s**t together ladies! He treated you like s**t before the baby was born, you had a red flag on the first date. People suck in general, men are crazy and women are crazy, don't victimize yourself, be better. We're smarter than that. I know I'll get hate for it but seriously, stop playing dumb.
Sad stories. But please note that also guys can fall victim of toxic relationships. Maybe less talked about, but nonetheless true.Abuse can come from all sides and all genders. Plus: if you hear a victim story, you might actually be talking to the one that abuses. Verify before jumping to conclusions.
Parents, raise your men to respect women. Ladies if they don't respect you get out. Don't have kids with them, don't marry them.
*Parents, raise your children to respect people.
Load More Replies... One day I'm hoping to hear the other side of these sorts of stories. Some of them are... definitely in need of a backstory and the other side of things.
You want to know the other side of “me and my side chick were using you for money”? Hmm
Load More Replies... I'm trying to have some sympathy for these women but I can't mainly because they are STUPID. ALL of these signs were evident early in the relationship, yet they continued in the relationship. I dated a guy for about a year and finally woke up when he refused to attend a wedding of my friend after I had attended FOUR of his friend's weddings, plus countless showers and spending my time buying the wedding presents (he did reimburse me, but only after asking numerous times). I would rather be alone, than waste my time on a boyfriend/husband who treated me poorly. But I suspect all of these women wanted to live a 'good' life supplied by the man. I once asked a girlfriend why she hadn't divorced her husband who had cheated on her many times - her response was "then I would have to live like you! - meaning a small house (that was mine), only one vacation each year (which was fully paid for) and a new car maybe every 10 years rather than every other year.
So is Bored Panda going to make one of these lists for times that men realized that their wives hated them? Though I'm betting that if they made that list they would still twist it to blame the guy for the wife hating them.
I don't think you realize how incredibly hard it can be.
Load More Replies... It's their fault they were treated like s**t?? Check your misogyny.
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