Women Share 12 Tricks They Use For Creepy Men That Ask For Number And Don’t Understand ‘No’
Some people don’t know the meaning of the word “no.” And that makes them incredibly hard to deal with. Luckily, tumblr user daree-to-dream — who has had her share of creepy encounters — decided to share some of the tricks she uses when annoying creeps ask for their phone number. When you think about it, it’s sad that things like this are necessary in the first place, but you never know when you might need them. Better safe than sorry, right?
Image credits: daree-to-dream
Image credits: daree-to-dream
Keep in mind that it’s perfectly normal if you do not wish to give out your number. Even if you simply don’t feel like doing it. That doesn’t make you stuck up or rude, after all, you’re an autonomous human being and that includes deciding who gets to be in contact with you.
The post quickly went viral, generating nearly 85,000 notes on tumblr
Image credits: daree-to-dream
In a paper published in New Ideas in Psychology, two researchers from Knox College tried to outline a more comprehensible definition of creepiness. After doing an empirical study, they concluded that a person’s “creepiness detector” pings when they encounter something unpredictable or outside the norm. For example, someone with idiosyncratic behavioral patterns, unusual physical characteristics, or a tendency to over or under-emote. To put it simply, we get a weird vibe when someone looks or behaves in a way that appears unstable or violates social norms. Usually, because we believe they may pose danger to us.
The researchers got their data from an international online survey of 1,341 people with an average age of just under 30. Participants rated the likelihood of a creepy person enacting 44 different behaviors and one of the top-ranked behaviors was habitually steering the conversations toward sex.
Eventually, people started sharing other ways to get our of the difficult situation
I was once really close to interfer after a man asked a teen her number at the bus station. He didn"t understand the "no" and was insisting until he said "but why won't you give me your phone number? I asked nicely!" But she answered "Oh your shirt is beautiful! can I blow my nose on it?" When he said "no" with an horrified face she added "but I asked nicely!" He left without a word and I'm still laughing when I think of her nice comeback.
Instead of giving women tips on how to avoid creeps who won't take "No" for an answer, we should focus on teaching men not to behave like this, and creating better police responses to these situations (i.e. no more asking a woman how she was dressed, actually testing rape kits, etc.)
Until the world becomes perfect, everyone still needs to know how to,protect themselves. Even with education and training, their will be predators and people who just Do. Not. Care
Load More Replies...Tell the guy you had 5 kids in 5 years and all are under the age of 6. All guys run from that. Enjoy your evening
This is for everyone on here that is saying "Just Say No, Stop Making Excuses, You Were Never Really In Danger, You Are Just Being Dramatic...." Here's my story. I was in the grocery store, on a Saturday afternoon. I notice a guy is following me. He stands directly behind me, sometime touching me. The first time I say 'Excuse me' and move away. The subsequent times, I realize what is going on. He finally talks to me, but it's not a 'Hey, I'd like to get to know you' type of thing, it's a 'Yo, you gonna be my b***h' type of thing. I tell him NO Thank You and move on. Next thing I know is he's got my face in his grip, hard, and is nearly spitting in my face "No One Tells Me NO, B***h. I Can Find Where You Live. I Will Follow You Home. You Are Going To Be Mine, B***h!" He slammed my head against the shelves. That is when the manager shows up, with backup, and gets me away from this guy. The cops are called. There is a difference between a guy wanting a date and a guy instilling fear.
I lived in a smaller city that's main industry was farming. We had a pretty big hispanic community..some straight from Mexico. So one day I drop my neighbor and her daughter (15) at the store while I ran to the bank. Suddenly I'm getting a call from her to come get them quickly. Turns out that 3 men in their mid 40's were following my friends daughter around the store harassing her to go out on a date with them. Now this girl is gorgeous, but obviously 15 years old. I had them point out the men then wait outside. I go to the manager..point out the men. The manager escorts them out one by one. I took photos and had the manager translate to them in spanish that if they ever did anything like that again..I would not only get the police involved, I'd find their wives and tell them what they'd done. The manager trespassed them and apologized profusely. He then escorted us around the store until we were done shopping. One is bad enough..but three?
Load More Replies...why don't women just always say no.... “Men are afraid women will laugh at them. Women are afraid men will kill them.” – Margaret Atwood ...it's a true statement.
Famously quoted by Courtney Barnett in "Nameless, Faceless". "I hold my keys, between my fingers..."
Load More Replies...My (now) wife had a stalker who would call 20 to 50 times a day. She would block a number, and he would spoof another one and continue to call. He did this for *years*. I answered the call twice and let him know that she wanted him to stop... and he did. But she still has nightmares, anxiety attacks, and won't go out alone because of that creep.
How can we call our self civilized when our sisters and daughters still have to resort to all this thing just to walk safe on streets?
All those who believe it is really as simple as saying a strong NO or pushing a man aside need to grow up, become aware and educate themselves. How many women are stalked, assaulted and even murdered because they said NO to a man's advances? To those who insist that women need to exercise more discretion as to where they go, how they dress, whether they drink or not or insist that only "certain types" of women experience harassment should grow up, put aside your twisted judgements and become educated! STOP BLAMING VICTIMS!
It is true. Some men are afraid women are laughing at them. Many women are afraid men are going to kill them. and/ or rape them.
Load More Replies...It's sad that most people suggested saying "I have a boyfriend". It's a painful proof that most men respect other men much more than they respect women. In this case, a man respects other man's "lady property" and keeps off, instead of just respecting the woman and accepting the very simple word "NO".
Ladies, if you don't want to give your number, don't do it! No spoofs, no nothing. Just a loudly screamed NO will do the trick. There are a lot of people who will watch out for you.
Yeah but the whole point of this article is what to do if you don't have that option. You're in a crowded party or concert and everyone is already screaming, no one's going to hear or care about your 'no.' What next?
Load More Replies...Me: "I have a boyfriend" / Him: "It's a lie." True story. Listen, guys, NEVER EVER go for the "It's-a-lie technique". You're not achieving anything with this. It's offensive, and even in cases when it really is a lie, it's still a "No." No matter how beautiful she is, there is no joy in a loveless relationship, and no, she won't eventually start to love you if you force her into this.
I wonder if the comments saying "Just say no!" are from men. Probably.
It’s that, or women who never spent time among other human beings.
Load More Replies...Many people don’t understand that many times “being honest”, “having a good relationship with the word no”, etc does not work with the type of person this post is talking about. Even sometimes saying you have a boyfriend doesn’t work. The type of person this post is talking about is persistent, creepy, and doesn’t understand the word no. It’s very insulting to assume that it’s our fault if we get hit on creepily >:(
It's not misleading or cruel. And no is not always an option. Too many men resort to violence when women brush them off. Why should we have to fear for our lives too much to say "no"?
I would give the creeper the number for the company that sells the erectile dysfunction pills that they are always selling on the telly...
We don't get those ads in the UK and now I feel genuinely disappointed that we don't!
Load More Replies...Just do as a lady did. Ask for his phone to type in your number. Edit his mom's telephonenumber with your name and enjoy the idea of the awkward moment when he sends his mom dickpics.
Good idea if they're just a creep but some are dangerous - not always easy to spot which ones are which.
Load More Replies...A jerk in a bar gave me a hard time once. He kept hitting on me, even after I told him I have a boyfriend. He laughed. Later he sat next to me. I warned him that I had a boyfriend (this is true, dammit!) but he laughed and said I didn't. Finally he went too far, putting his hand on my thigh. I warned him that he had better take it off, and he laughed. "You don't have a boyfriend!" the ugly f--k mocked me. That was the last damn straw. I grabbed him by the beard, looked him right in the eye, and said "TAKE YOUR DIRTY PAW OFF OF ME YOU SMELLY BABOON BEFORE I MAKE YOU REGRET YOUR Y CHROMOSOME!" Moments later, he got thrown out of the bar.
Wtf is wrong with people who can't take no for an answer? Is it really that common? Geebus people... how do you get off thinking being a creep is going to improve your chances? o_O
I’m afraid it is, unfortunately. It is that common. I know few women who hasn’t been subjected to it, most on a regular basis. It’s really quite bizarre.
Load More Replies...Where exactly do these social fucktard men “learn” this behavior and how quickly can we shut that s**t down?
So no, I don't want your number No, I don't want to give you mine and No, I don't want to meet you nowhere No, I don't want none of your time
sitting in the passenger side of his best friend's ride, trying to holla at me
Load More Replies...Notice how the comments in the article that say “just tell him you have a bf” or that giving a fake number is cruel, etc are all from men? They really don’t get it. Smh.
men are literally killing women hitting them verbally abusing them because they dont want to give you their number, you cant even approach me with respect what makes u think i want to give u my number, i just avoid all interaction if possible
For the few folks saying women are exaggerating the threat, here's the most recent incident (woman in Manchester knocked out by a guy after politely telling him "no"): https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/crime/woman-punched-manchester-video-police-appeal-suspect-a9013281.html
This article reminded me of the book THE GIFT OF FEAR by Gavin De Becker, a former victim's advocate. The book teaches people to follow their instincts: humans are the only animals who will defy their instincts for reasons such as "I don't want to be ruled by fear" or not trusting themselves. Other beings resort to "fight or flight." The book shows how many victims KNEW on some level that something wasn't right. The case stories are chilling and compelling. The lesson: trust yourself, your instincts and your intuition. If you're wrong, no loss. What comes to mind for ladies who are harassed like this: get a second phone. Most carriers offer a second phone for very low cost -- or get a burner phone (Target, Walmart, 7-11) and use it to collect voice messages and the number of the caller. Since it's not connected to an ongoing agreement or billing cycle, there's no way to trace you.
I think the real point, and what is so sad about this entire discourse, is that women should not need to do any of this. I should not need to give a fake number, or create an elaborate lie about a spouse/boyfriend, or be worried about his reaction. I should just be able to say no. Period.
What I find so sad is that women do have to do all these things. No is not perceived as a complete sentence and can get women killed - that’s what really gets me.
Load More Replies...There was a man who wouldn't take no for an answer so I started barking at him, he was freaked out and went away very quickly
In recent years, I've taken to not asking for phone numbers; instead, I offer mine and say, "Call me if you're interested in talking, and if not, be happy, be healthy, be cool." It beats the daylights out of asking nicely ONCE and having the woman either throw a fit like I'm attacking her, or make sarcastic, condescending remarks. I was raised to respect women, and I get very tired when I'm treated like I'm some stereotypical pig.
Now that’s how to do it! Although try to forgive women - they don’t know you’re not dangerous. It doesn’t show, there are no give aways. Keep up your splendid way and give women some time - once you turn out to be safe, you don’t have to suffer the suspicion any longer. All you have to do is prove you’re safe, and all you need to do to prove it is to not become dangerous! Normal behaviour for you, in other words! Women don’t enjoy being cautious, it’s not a hobby or a quirk: just be your nice self, and you’ll be taken off the “potential danger” list in a wink.
Load More Replies...I think its sad that women should have to give a husbands or boyfriends number or feel compelled to prove they have a BF or husband to make a creepy guy go away, its like the creepy guy will respect another man but not the women who he is hitting on when she says no. Women are not the property of men, and 'No' is a complete sentence and should not need explanation.
I used to politely tell men no who asked for my number or if they were insisting on talking to me that I was just there with my friends and not interested in talking to them. 100% of the time, the man became angry and demanded to know why I did not want to talk to him. Being honest made me feel better but it didn't stop the creeps, they are used to rejection. I'm just not good at lying.
If they don't understand the complete sentence "no", get physically as far from them as you can, as close to other people as you can get. Choose couples, or families. If you feel threatened, tell him loudly to leave you alone. Tell the people near you, in a quiet voice, that you need help, that he won't leave you alone. I have used this tactic myself. I once fled down the street in Istanbul Turkey, dashing from gentle old man to old man as a creep chased me. Every time he neared, I would shout "sin!" in Turkish, because my limited vocabulary didn't include "creep". In college I spied a man from my German class in a group ahead of us while a creep was verbally harassing my friends and me, getting dangerously close. I yelled out in German"hey, Brian, please wait for us! We don't know this guy and he is bothering us!" My classmate and his frowaited for us.
I love giving out the non-emergency number to the police and sheriff's department. A dispatcher answers the call per company called. Justice.
When I was in my early 20s, I would get approached by some serious creepers who wouldn't let it go when I denied my digits. One time it got really creepy as the guy came back multiple times, each time more drunk and aggressive (I was out for a work gathering). I eventually gave him a number... the local police office. Hope he enjoyed stalking them!
these guys are like that guy who takes women's license plate numbers and then goes to their house to "educate" them.
I've not experienced this yet, but I have a few safeguards. I can tell them things like my experience with martial arts. If that doesn't work, then I don't know.
Don't do that. Just say no. If the guy persists tell a bouncer or barkeep or friend or something. People need to learn the meaning of "no". Excuses and lies will not help.
You quite clearly have no clue what you’re talking about. I’m glad you get to live in a safe world, though; just don’t assume that’s true for others.
Load More Replies...i don't know why some guys can't or won't take no for an answer or just the phrase "i'm not interested" and move on. it makes someone very uncomfortable when they still are persistent or want an explanation of why you won't go out with them. try saying these same phrases to a man as a plus size woman and it is ten times worse. i can't count the number of times i have been called fat b***h or have them say i should be happy they want my number. even if you give them a number that you know you won't pick up, i have had some guys call in right in front of me to see if it's a working number. so saying no, i'm not interesting or just giving a number to get away doesn't work. do these guys even realize how far over the line into creep zone they are and just don't care.
I was alone in München Train Station and got followed by a man. I tried to go to a crowded place but I panicked and went the wrong way, to a completely empty area. He stopped me then and asked for my number, my name, where I live, etc. Wouldn’t take a no so I lied, made an excuse and just ran away. It can be scary when they just don’t back down.
Gave them my coworkers number. I had a big deep voice. I do like dudes giving THEIR number first. Nothin wrong with that.
My friend Áine, an Irish redhead: Man: "Give me your number." Áine: "One" (Accompanied by a piercing glare) 25591905_1...7596b9.jpg
Isn't it sad that women need to do these things? What ever gave some men the idea that this behavior is wanted?
Well... Why does these guys never offer their numbers, leaving her to call/text them, if she is ok with it? Sounds more fair to me....
I just tell everybody I don't have a phone lol, or I will flip the conversation and manipulate them with politeness as if we're really getting along and then I'll say brb and slip out and they always just stand there waiting thinking they are about to score lol
This is the same as saying women should dress modest so they'll have less chance of getting raped... :-(
I agree with the 'Why should we have to resort to this b******t.' Ideally we should just be honest. Not our problem if they don't like it. If you don't have the confidence for brutal honesty or you do feel intimidated or whatever, just say 'I don't give my phone number out.' No one should be giving out fake numbers or any of that b*llocks.
i agree but there are still some people out there who won't accept that answer. sometimes we just need to be a bit extra prepared
Load More Replies...In an ideal world there would be no stalkers, nobody would take a simple nicety as a declaration of love, and simply stating that you don't want to have any sort of relationship with them wouldn't be seen as an act of aggression. People shouldn't have to worry about their safety just because they're not interested in someone. If you have a serious issue with people giving out fake numbers maybe you have a bigger issue. Don't get mad you got a fake number- try and figure out why you got a fake number and go from there.
Women shouldn't have to lie and men who ask for a number shouldn't get lied to. One strategy is to simply say that you don't give out your number to anyone you don't know and then offer to let him give you his.
that may work once in a while but its better to be extra sure since there is always at least one person who can't deal with being rejected
Load More Replies...I agree with one of the commenters...why must we as women be forced to go to great lengths to set up fake phone numbers and fake names to protect ourselves! This is ridiculous and it is also ridiculous that a grown man cannot accept a polite "I am flattered buy no thank you" for an answer. I do understand the need to protect ourselves but it makes me super annoyed that the men who create these awkward situations have no problem making a woman uncomfortable enough that she feels the need to give fake names and numbers. A decent and good human being will accept the decision with grace. Thank you to those of you who respect a womans choice!
I would say "No" and if they pushed it, I'd yell loudly enough "Oh my God! What are you doing you creep! I told you to keep your hands to yourself. You pervert!! Security!!!" They'd throw hands up, slink away and never approach me again. It also got the message out to the rest of the creeps to leave me alone. After all, some girls aren't looking for men..they're just having a girls night out. I got called names a lot, but I shrug it off because it speaks volumes about their immaturity and lack of intelligence. My gf's usually got a giggle out of it too.
In a crowded place, this is actually a good advice. But It's also the way society wants you to act. How many times do we hear the blame being put on the victim because she (or he) didn't make a scene in public....
Load More Replies...I agree with some of the answers below that advise us to stand up for our wants and values. Don't let anyone intimidate you. Stand your ground and say no. Say "get the hell out of my face" if you have to. If they persist and/or if you feel like your safety is threatened, call the police. Are their feelings more important than yours? No. Simply No. They shouldnt be, ever. If you dont like someone, no excuses necessary. Don't reinforce this harassing behavior. They won't even recognize they are in the wrong and the cycle will continue.
They know damn well they're in the wrong. They aren't children, they are full grown adult men who think if they just keep on pestering they'll eventually wear you down.
Load More Replies...Herpes is not a punch line. 90% of the world population has one form or another of it... smh people are so uneducated. It's this kind of ignorance that A) leads to the spread of STIs because people don't talk about it, and B) the stigma that led to the suicide of a very close family friend. I will forever stand up to these base jokes in his honor. RIP
I understand your point, but nobody is making fun of herpes here. These women are afraid of getting murdered so someone suggested that they should claim to have an infectious disease and maybe that will make the pervert go away. It doesn't make light of herpes. It's legitimate advice.
Load More Replies...Good looking guy - "he was so sweet when he asked for my number" - Not so good looking guy - "that creep harassed me by trying to talk to me".
Well...my first comment got deleted, because my opinion wasn't popular. (or let's say it got hidden, and then I deleted it) No matter what you might have thought about my opinion...deleting it, because most people don't like it...that's censorship. But well...let's clarify some things then again: I said, that women should not try to come up with s****y excuses, and just be straightforward. They should tell a guy, when they are not interested, instead of coming up with fake stuff. It takes a lot of courage for men, especially when they are labeled as "creepy" to approach a girl and ask for a number. And if they don't give up, after hearing the first "no" isn't necessary a bad thing. If the guy would be handsome as f**k, then this wouldn't be the issue, right girls? Even if you would still not be interested, because you have a boyfriend e.g. You would giggle and and feel safe, just because he doesn't seem creepy. I received a backlash on telling women to be honest and
It doesn't matter how good looking he is if he acts like a creep. And what don't you understand about violence against women? What would you do if someone asked you to give them $10. A stranger, I mean. And you say 'no.' So he asks again. Say he looks like a nice regular guy, but keeps asking over and over even though you said 'no.' Would you think that's okay?
Load More Replies...Umm, as someone who lived in Italy for 2 years, I definitely had to deal with this there. It's a thing that happens everywhere. I also got followed a lot more in Europe (compared to the US) after saying no and trying to walk away. It's great you've never had to deal with it, but there are times where it gets really scary, really fast.
Load More Replies...That doesn't always work. Sometimes that puts you in more danger.
Load More Replies...Nobody is saying you give every guy the police department's number. The title says it all, it's for men who keep on and on at you and won't take no for an answer.
Load More Replies...Enjoy it while it lasts? Enjoy what, getting hit on by some man you have no interest in who WILL NOT TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER??? I'm in my 60s and I do NOT miss it one bit!
Load More Replies...If you're doing this to your ex what's to stop him from explaining and giving the creep your real number? I really doubt your ex is as destroyed about your dating life as you might want him to be.
Load More Replies...You've never been scared for your life of a strange creeper have you.
Load More Replies...I was once really close to interfer after a man asked a teen her number at the bus station. He didn"t understand the "no" and was insisting until he said "but why won't you give me your phone number? I asked nicely!" But she answered "Oh your shirt is beautiful! can I blow my nose on it?" When he said "no" with an horrified face she added "but I asked nicely!" He left without a word and I'm still laughing when I think of her nice comeback.
Instead of giving women tips on how to avoid creeps who won't take "No" for an answer, we should focus on teaching men not to behave like this, and creating better police responses to these situations (i.e. no more asking a woman how she was dressed, actually testing rape kits, etc.)
Until the world becomes perfect, everyone still needs to know how to,protect themselves. Even with education and training, their will be predators and people who just Do. Not. Care
Load More Replies...Tell the guy you had 5 kids in 5 years and all are under the age of 6. All guys run from that. Enjoy your evening
This is for everyone on here that is saying "Just Say No, Stop Making Excuses, You Were Never Really In Danger, You Are Just Being Dramatic...." Here's my story. I was in the grocery store, on a Saturday afternoon. I notice a guy is following me. He stands directly behind me, sometime touching me. The first time I say 'Excuse me' and move away. The subsequent times, I realize what is going on. He finally talks to me, but it's not a 'Hey, I'd like to get to know you' type of thing, it's a 'Yo, you gonna be my b***h' type of thing. I tell him NO Thank You and move on. Next thing I know is he's got my face in his grip, hard, and is nearly spitting in my face "No One Tells Me NO, B***h. I Can Find Where You Live. I Will Follow You Home. You Are Going To Be Mine, B***h!" He slammed my head against the shelves. That is when the manager shows up, with backup, and gets me away from this guy. The cops are called. There is a difference between a guy wanting a date and a guy instilling fear.
I lived in a smaller city that's main industry was farming. We had a pretty big hispanic community..some straight from Mexico. So one day I drop my neighbor and her daughter (15) at the store while I ran to the bank. Suddenly I'm getting a call from her to come get them quickly. Turns out that 3 men in their mid 40's were following my friends daughter around the store harassing her to go out on a date with them. Now this girl is gorgeous, but obviously 15 years old. I had them point out the men then wait outside. I go to the manager..point out the men. The manager escorts them out one by one. I took photos and had the manager translate to them in spanish that if they ever did anything like that again..I would not only get the police involved, I'd find their wives and tell them what they'd done. The manager trespassed them and apologized profusely. He then escorted us around the store until we were done shopping. One is bad enough..but three?
Load More Replies...why don't women just always say no.... “Men are afraid women will laugh at them. Women are afraid men will kill them.” – Margaret Atwood ...it's a true statement.
Famously quoted by Courtney Barnett in "Nameless, Faceless". "I hold my keys, between my fingers..."
Load More Replies...My (now) wife had a stalker who would call 20 to 50 times a day. She would block a number, and he would spoof another one and continue to call. He did this for *years*. I answered the call twice and let him know that she wanted him to stop... and he did. But she still has nightmares, anxiety attacks, and won't go out alone because of that creep.
How can we call our self civilized when our sisters and daughters still have to resort to all this thing just to walk safe on streets?
All those who believe it is really as simple as saying a strong NO or pushing a man aside need to grow up, become aware and educate themselves. How many women are stalked, assaulted and even murdered because they said NO to a man's advances? To those who insist that women need to exercise more discretion as to where they go, how they dress, whether they drink or not or insist that only "certain types" of women experience harassment should grow up, put aside your twisted judgements and become educated! STOP BLAMING VICTIMS!
It is true. Some men are afraid women are laughing at them. Many women are afraid men are going to kill them. and/ or rape them.
Load More Replies...It's sad that most people suggested saying "I have a boyfriend". It's a painful proof that most men respect other men much more than they respect women. In this case, a man respects other man's "lady property" and keeps off, instead of just respecting the woman and accepting the very simple word "NO".
Ladies, if you don't want to give your number, don't do it! No spoofs, no nothing. Just a loudly screamed NO will do the trick. There are a lot of people who will watch out for you.
Yeah but the whole point of this article is what to do if you don't have that option. You're in a crowded party or concert and everyone is already screaming, no one's going to hear or care about your 'no.' What next?
Load More Replies...Me: "I have a boyfriend" / Him: "It's a lie." True story. Listen, guys, NEVER EVER go for the "It's-a-lie technique". You're not achieving anything with this. It's offensive, and even in cases when it really is a lie, it's still a "No." No matter how beautiful she is, there is no joy in a loveless relationship, and no, she won't eventually start to love you if you force her into this.
I wonder if the comments saying "Just say no!" are from men. Probably.
It’s that, or women who never spent time among other human beings.
Load More Replies...Many people don’t understand that many times “being honest”, “having a good relationship with the word no”, etc does not work with the type of person this post is talking about. Even sometimes saying you have a boyfriend doesn’t work. The type of person this post is talking about is persistent, creepy, and doesn’t understand the word no. It’s very insulting to assume that it’s our fault if we get hit on creepily >:(
It's not misleading or cruel. And no is not always an option. Too many men resort to violence when women brush them off. Why should we have to fear for our lives too much to say "no"?
I would give the creeper the number for the company that sells the erectile dysfunction pills that they are always selling on the telly...
We don't get those ads in the UK and now I feel genuinely disappointed that we don't!
Load More Replies...Just do as a lady did. Ask for his phone to type in your number. Edit his mom's telephonenumber with your name and enjoy the idea of the awkward moment when he sends his mom dickpics.
Good idea if they're just a creep but some are dangerous - not always easy to spot which ones are which.
Load More Replies...A jerk in a bar gave me a hard time once. He kept hitting on me, even after I told him I have a boyfriend. He laughed. Later he sat next to me. I warned him that I had a boyfriend (this is true, dammit!) but he laughed and said I didn't. Finally he went too far, putting his hand on my thigh. I warned him that he had better take it off, and he laughed. "You don't have a boyfriend!" the ugly f--k mocked me. That was the last damn straw. I grabbed him by the beard, looked him right in the eye, and said "TAKE YOUR DIRTY PAW OFF OF ME YOU SMELLY BABOON BEFORE I MAKE YOU REGRET YOUR Y CHROMOSOME!" Moments later, he got thrown out of the bar.
Wtf is wrong with people who can't take no for an answer? Is it really that common? Geebus people... how do you get off thinking being a creep is going to improve your chances? o_O
I’m afraid it is, unfortunately. It is that common. I know few women who hasn’t been subjected to it, most on a regular basis. It’s really quite bizarre.
Load More Replies...Where exactly do these social fucktard men “learn” this behavior and how quickly can we shut that s**t down?
So no, I don't want your number No, I don't want to give you mine and No, I don't want to meet you nowhere No, I don't want none of your time
sitting in the passenger side of his best friend's ride, trying to holla at me
Load More Replies...Notice how the comments in the article that say “just tell him you have a bf” or that giving a fake number is cruel, etc are all from men? They really don’t get it. Smh.
men are literally killing women hitting them verbally abusing them because they dont want to give you their number, you cant even approach me with respect what makes u think i want to give u my number, i just avoid all interaction if possible
For the few folks saying women are exaggerating the threat, here's the most recent incident (woman in Manchester knocked out by a guy after politely telling him "no"): https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/crime/woman-punched-manchester-video-police-appeal-suspect-a9013281.html
This article reminded me of the book THE GIFT OF FEAR by Gavin De Becker, a former victim's advocate. The book teaches people to follow their instincts: humans are the only animals who will defy their instincts for reasons such as "I don't want to be ruled by fear" or not trusting themselves. Other beings resort to "fight or flight." The book shows how many victims KNEW on some level that something wasn't right. The case stories are chilling and compelling. The lesson: trust yourself, your instincts and your intuition. If you're wrong, no loss. What comes to mind for ladies who are harassed like this: get a second phone. Most carriers offer a second phone for very low cost -- or get a burner phone (Target, Walmart, 7-11) and use it to collect voice messages and the number of the caller. Since it's not connected to an ongoing agreement or billing cycle, there's no way to trace you.
I think the real point, and what is so sad about this entire discourse, is that women should not need to do any of this. I should not need to give a fake number, or create an elaborate lie about a spouse/boyfriend, or be worried about his reaction. I should just be able to say no. Period.
What I find so sad is that women do have to do all these things. No is not perceived as a complete sentence and can get women killed - that’s what really gets me.
Load More Replies...There was a man who wouldn't take no for an answer so I started barking at him, he was freaked out and went away very quickly
In recent years, I've taken to not asking for phone numbers; instead, I offer mine and say, "Call me if you're interested in talking, and if not, be happy, be healthy, be cool." It beats the daylights out of asking nicely ONCE and having the woman either throw a fit like I'm attacking her, or make sarcastic, condescending remarks. I was raised to respect women, and I get very tired when I'm treated like I'm some stereotypical pig.
Now that’s how to do it! Although try to forgive women - they don’t know you’re not dangerous. It doesn’t show, there are no give aways. Keep up your splendid way and give women some time - once you turn out to be safe, you don’t have to suffer the suspicion any longer. All you have to do is prove you’re safe, and all you need to do to prove it is to not become dangerous! Normal behaviour for you, in other words! Women don’t enjoy being cautious, it’s not a hobby or a quirk: just be your nice self, and you’ll be taken off the “potential danger” list in a wink.
Load More Replies...I think its sad that women should have to give a husbands or boyfriends number or feel compelled to prove they have a BF or husband to make a creepy guy go away, its like the creepy guy will respect another man but not the women who he is hitting on when she says no. Women are not the property of men, and 'No' is a complete sentence and should not need explanation.
I used to politely tell men no who asked for my number or if they were insisting on talking to me that I was just there with my friends and not interested in talking to them. 100% of the time, the man became angry and demanded to know why I did not want to talk to him. Being honest made me feel better but it didn't stop the creeps, they are used to rejection. I'm just not good at lying.
If they don't understand the complete sentence "no", get physically as far from them as you can, as close to other people as you can get. Choose couples, or families. If you feel threatened, tell him loudly to leave you alone. Tell the people near you, in a quiet voice, that you need help, that he won't leave you alone. I have used this tactic myself. I once fled down the street in Istanbul Turkey, dashing from gentle old man to old man as a creep chased me. Every time he neared, I would shout "sin!" in Turkish, because my limited vocabulary didn't include "creep". In college I spied a man from my German class in a group ahead of us while a creep was verbally harassing my friends and me, getting dangerously close. I yelled out in German"hey, Brian, please wait for us! We don't know this guy and he is bothering us!" My classmate and his frowaited for us.
I love giving out the non-emergency number to the police and sheriff's department. A dispatcher answers the call per company called. Justice.
When I was in my early 20s, I would get approached by some serious creepers who wouldn't let it go when I denied my digits. One time it got really creepy as the guy came back multiple times, each time more drunk and aggressive (I was out for a work gathering). I eventually gave him a number... the local police office. Hope he enjoyed stalking them!
these guys are like that guy who takes women's license plate numbers and then goes to their house to "educate" them.
I've not experienced this yet, but I have a few safeguards. I can tell them things like my experience with martial arts. If that doesn't work, then I don't know.
Don't do that. Just say no. If the guy persists tell a bouncer or barkeep or friend or something. People need to learn the meaning of "no". Excuses and lies will not help.
You quite clearly have no clue what you’re talking about. I’m glad you get to live in a safe world, though; just don’t assume that’s true for others.
Load More Replies...i don't know why some guys can't or won't take no for an answer or just the phrase "i'm not interested" and move on. it makes someone very uncomfortable when they still are persistent or want an explanation of why you won't go out with them. try saying these same phrases to a man as a plus size woman and it is ten times worse. i can't count the number of times i have been called fat b***h or have them say i should be happy they want my number. even if you give them a number that you know you won't pick up, i have had some guys call in right in front of me to see if it's a working number. so saying no, i'm not interesting or just giving a number to get away doesn't work. do these guys even realize how far over the line into creep zone they are and just don't care.
I was alone in München Train Station and got followed by a man. I tried to go to a crowded place but I panicked and went the wrong way, to a completely empty area. He stopped me then and asked for my number, my name, where I live, etc. Wouldn’t take a no so I lied, made an excuse and just ran away. It can be scary when they just don’t back down.
Gave them my coworkers number. I had a big deep voice. I do like dudes giving THEIR number first. Nothin wrong with that.
My friend Áine, an Irish redhead: Man: "Give me your number." Áine: "One" (Accompanied by a piercing glare) 25591905_1...7596b9.jpg
Isn't it sad that women need to do these things? What ever gave some men the idea that this behavior is wanted?
Well... Why does these guys never offer their numbers, leaving her to call/text them, if she is ok with it? Sounds more fair to me....
I just tell everybody I don't have a phone lol, or I will flip the conversation and manipulate them with politeness as if we're really getting along and then I'll say brb and slip out and they always just stand there waiting thinking they are about to score lol
This is the same as saying women should dress modest so they'll have less chance of getting raped... :-(
I agree with the 'Why should we have to resort to this b******t.' Ideally we should just be honest. Not our problem if they don't like it. If you don't have the confidence for brutal honesty or you do feel intimidated or whatever, just say 'I don't give my phone number out.' No one should be giving out fake numbers or any of that b*llocks.
i agree but there are still some people out there who won't accept that answer. sometimes we just need to be a bit extra prepared
Load More Replies...In an ideal world there would be no stalkers, nobody would take a simple nicety as a declaration of love, and simply stating that you don't want to have any sort of relationship with them wouldn't be seen as an act of aggression. People shouldn't have to worry about their safety just because they're not interested in someone. If you have a serious issue with people giving out fake numbers maybe you have a bigger issue. Don't get mad you got a fake number- try and figure out why you got a fake number and go from there.
Women shouldn't have to lie and men who ask for a number shouldn't get lied to. One strategy is to simply say that you don't give out your number to anyone you don't know and then offer to let him give you his.
that may work once in a while but its better to be extra sure since there is always at least one person who can't deal with being rejected
Load More Replies...I agree with one of the commenters...why must we as women be forced to go to great lengths to set up fake phone numbers and fake names to protect ourselves! This is ridiculous and it is also ridiculous that a grown man cannot accept a polite "I am flattered buy no thank you" for an answer. I do understand the need to protect ourselves but it makes me super annoyed that the men who create these awkward situations have no problem making a woman uncomfortable enough that she feels the need to give fake names and numbers. A decent and good human being will accept the decision with grace. Thank you to those of you who respect a womans choice!
I would say "No" and if they pushed it, I'd yell loudly enough "Oh my God! What are you doing you creep! I told you to keep your hands to yourself. You pervert!! Security!!!" They'd throw hands up, slink away and never approach me again. It also got the message out to the rest of the creeps to leave me alone. After all, some girls aren't looking for men..they're just having a girls night out. I got called names a lot, but I shrug it off because it speaks volumes about their immaturity and lack of intelligence. My gf's usually got a giggle out of it too.
In a crowded place, this is actually a good advice. But It's also the way society wants you to act. How many times do we hear the blame being put on the victim because she (or he) didn't make a scene in public....
Load More Replies...I agree with some of the answers below that advise us to stand up for our wants and values. Don't let anyone intimidate you. Stand your ground and say no. Say "get the hell out of my face" if you have to. If they persist and/or if you feel like your safety is threatened, call the police. Are their feelings more important than yours? No. Simply No. They shouldnt be, ever. If you dont like someone, no excuses necessary. Don't reinforce this harassing behavior. They won't even recognize they are in the wrong and the cycle will continue.
They know damn well they're in the wrong. They aren't children, they are full grown adult men who think if they just keep on pestering they'll eventually wear you down.
Load More Replies...Herpes is not a punch line. 90% of the world population has one form or another of it... smh people are so uneducated. It's this kind of ignorance that A) leads to the spread of STIs because people don't talk about it, and B) the stigma that led to the suicide of a very close family friend. I will forever stand up to these base jokes in his honor. RIP
I understand your point, but nobody is making fun of herpes here. These women are afraid of getting murdered so someone suggested that they should claim to have an infectious disease and maybe that will make the pervert go away. It doesn't make light of herpes. It's legitimate advice.
Load More Replies...Good looking guy - "he was so sweet when he asked for my number" - Not so good looking guy - "that creep harassed me by trying to talk to me".
Well...my first comment got deleted, because my opinion wasn't popular. (or let's say it got hidden, and then I deleted it) No matter what you might have thought about my opinion...deleting it, because most people don't like it...that's censorship. But well...let's clarify some things then again: I said, that women should not try to come up with s****y excuses, and just be straightforward. They should tell a guy, when they are not interested, instead of coming up with fake stuff. It takes a lot of courage for men, especially when they are labeled as "creepy" to approach a girl and ask for a number. And if they don't give up, after hearing the first "no" isn't necessary a bad thing. If the guy would be handsome as f**k, then this wouldn't be the issue, right girls? Even if you would still not be interested, because you have a boyfriend e.g. You would giggle and and feel safe, just because he doesn't seem creepy. I received a backlash on telling women to be honest and
It doesn't matter how good looking he is if he acts like a creep. And what don't you understand about violence against women? What would you do if someone asked you to give them $10. A stranger, I mean. And you say 'no.' So he asks again. Say he looks like a nice regular guy, but keeps asking over and over even though you said 'no.' Would you think that's okay?
Load More Replies...Umm, as someone who lived in Italy for 2 years, I definitely had to deal with this there. It's a thing that happens everywhere. I also got followed a lot more in Europe (compared to the US) after saying no and trying to walk away. It's great you've never had to deal with it, but there are times where it gets really scary, really fast.
Load More Replies...That doesn't always work. Sometimes that puts you in more danger.
Load More Replies...Nobody is saying you give every guy the police department's number. The title says it all, it's for men who keep on and on at you and won't take no for an answer.
Load More Replies...Enjoy it while it lasts? Enjoy what, getting hit on by some man you have no interest in who WILL NOT TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER??? I'm in my 60s and I do NOT miss it one bit!
Load More Replies...If you're doing this to your ex what's to stop him from explaining and giving the creep your real number? I really doubt your ex is as destroyed about your dating life as you might want him to be.
Load More Replies...You've never been scared for your life of a strange creeper have you.
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