30 Women Share “Something A Man Did That Made You Realize You’ve Been Accepting Too Little From Men”
One woman's story has inspired others to search for partners who exceed their standards and expectations by simply describing all the things her fiancé does on a daily basis to make her happy.
Her name is Rose and the 22-year-old is known on TikTok by the username @rosesmaddox. Last month, she discovered a video by @ayandastood, asking: “What is something a man has done for you that made you realise you’ve been accepting and expecting way too little from men?” and decided to reply.
Rose explained that her fiancé Drake, 23, whom she has been with since she was 15, always makes sure she feels loved, which includes supporting her career and bringing her flowers and gifts if she's having a difficult time.
Recently one TikToker asked other users to describe how a man has made them raise their standards
Image credits: ayandastood
And this woman's reply really stood out
@rosesmaddox #stitch with @ayandastood anyone that knows drake knows he is the epitome of a dream man
♬ Face Off - Dwayne Johnson - Tech N9ne & Joey Cool & King Iso & Dwayne Johnson
Speaking to BuzzFeed, Rose said that she was inspired to make the video after "about 100 examples of the kindness Drake shows me entered my mind" when she watched the initial prompt - and to "brag" about her love.
"I wanted to share (and honestly brag) about my other half being a light to this world, and that everyone should be with someone who makes them feel so proud to be their significant other," she explained.
Image credits: rosesmaddox
Image credits: rosesmaddox
"Drake's kindness is not limited to our relationship — he shares it with every person in his world"
Image credits: rose_maddox
Image credits: rose_maddox
"It is exemplified in his mannerisms, words, and actions. He leaves every place he enters happier, kinder, and more joyous"
Image credits: rose_maddox
Image credits: rose_maddox
Rose thinks her video went so viral because it showed what men are actually capable of and how selfless they can be. She also said that she returns the same kindness and love to him in their relationship.
And the bond they share is precisely what Drake thinks makes their relationship blossom the way it does. "I don't feel like I treat Rose better than other men treat their partners," he said. "I just think we have a really good friendship."
"The TikTok was pretty one-sided and gave plenty of examples on things I do that she appreciates, but most of the examples she gave was my attempt to reciprocate the amazing things she does for me. Despite the fact that Rose and I have been dating since high school and are soon to be married, I'm still pretty underqualified to give any meaningful relationship advice to other men. However, regarding the video, I've greatly appreciated the many compliments and inflated ego that have come with Rose going viral."
@rosesmaddox #greenscreenvideo #greenscreen a year filled with so much love
♬ original sound - Kyle Rothwell
Rose hopes her video helps people realize how they deserve to be treated in a relationship.
@rosesmaddox Reply to @askingxxashley #greenscreen #greenscreenvideo no fears y’all, I treat him well too!
♬ original sound - rosemaddox
"Be with someone so great that people who have never met you hope so dearly that you give the same love that your significant other gives to the world"
@rosesmaddox Reply to @veronugget #greenscreen the man himself
♬ original sound - rosemaddox
Here's what other women responded with
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My father always told me: If a man wants to, he finds a way. If he makes excuses he’s not worth your time.
This depends on the context. We cannot know what her father told this about. What if someone really cannot do something? What if he should help his partner some way, but he can't do it because of a health problem? For example, having to lift something heavy while helping her to move to another house. A lot of people with various problems cannot do things. What about someone with social phobia, who should phone the woman with whom they love each other, to tell something important, and he wants to call her, but finally he doesn't call her, because of his fears?
He suggested we play a game to get to know each other and he actually asked me real questions. Nothing sexual. It’s been awesome.
When he took accountability for doing something I did not like, apologized and changed his actions.
he said "you don't have to apologize for not being in the mood" when I kept saying sorry and explaining why.
He asked me if he could kiss me. It was so simple but thoughtful. Until then guys had just started grabbing and kissing me aggressively.
When I isolate due to my depression and he tells me, I want to hear how you feel. You don’t have to do this alone anymore.
This is sad but a guy was working late + he communicated he wouldn’t be able to take me out for dinner and sent dinner to my home instead.
So this one time, me and my boyfriend were having an argument we'd been together for awhile. But we were having this argument and it was just over stupid stuff, blown way out of proportion. We both had to just like walk away for a minute, just cool off.
And the next day we're kind of trying to like talk things out or whatever, and I was just desperately trying to say, like, "I'm so sorry." "I'm sorry. I acted that way." "I'm sorry. It was crazy." "I, this is why I think I am this way." "This is my explanation for who I am as a person" and he kind of stopped me. And he was like "Babe, you realize like you're allowed to feel however you feel right?
You know that right?" Hm. You know? No, I did not.
He has a bad memory, so he writes all my likes and dislikes in his notes, so he can always remember...
When I calmly asked him not to do something that upset me and he heard me out instead of getting upset and telling me I was being unreasonable.
When I fall asleep on him he always takes my glasses off and puts them on his bedside table
My medical and physical disabilities weren’t a big deal to him.
When he drove all the way to give me cuddles at 3 AM bc I was stressed. Thats when I knew.
Not as epic, but I realized, where the relationship is going, when she cancelled the date due to being ill, and I thought I simply must do something to make her feel better. So I bought her preferred home remedies plus flowers and chocolate and drove to her place. 15 years married next February.
The words "I will ALWAYS take your side in front of others", fam what.
I cant agree to this. If they are wrong let they know...if you back them up on something wrong in public itll bite you in the ass too. Had this happen before. Friend of mine was in the wrong and making a fool of themselves online n i called them out on it. They were furious i dodnt blindly have their back. But i explained they were wrong n they were just making more trouble for themselves n those they knew.
I met my husband & commented that my contacts were dry. Next time I saw him he brought eye drops. He’s raised the bar so high over the last 12 yrs.
he actually walked up to my door, knocked, & waited for me to be ready instead of just texting me that he’s here & sitting in his car
Physical affection. Also once, I told him “not tonight” and he said “okay,” held me and went to sleep.
Wait until you hit 60 and have been together for 30 years ...... once a year is OK maybe, that's just from my perspective (I'm the guy btw ..)
No man did anything, I just watched this tiktok and realized wow I’ve been excepting soo much less than minimum for years now.
He respected my boundaries.
I'm happy for you. However...respecting other people's boundaries should be something anyone above the age for 4 should do automatically.
What is something a man did for you that made you realize that you've been accepted? Okay. So I have this weird quirk ever since I was a little girl, very little. I would wake up in the middle of the night, like two or three, sometimes four in the morning to go downstairs to the kitchen and get a green apple.
And I would eat that apple half asleep and then go back to bed. I have been doing. Ever since I can remember like six or seven years old up until now in my thirties. I just, anyway, when Steven and I, my husband, my now husband and I were first together, literally 10 years ago, we were probably on our fourth date.
And, um, I had told him about this quirk of mine and he thought it was funny and cute or whatever. Anyway, he invited me back to his apartment to watch a movie with him and we still hadn't slept together or anything at the time. And I was like, okay, sure. But don't try anything funny. He's like, of course not.
So we go back and we watch some like European. Fucking indie film. I can't remember what it was called, but, um, we watched the movie and it's getting late and I'm getting tired and I'm like, you know, I'm really tired. He's like, yeah, you should probably sleep over. And I was like, okay. I, well remember, it's like the fourth date.
And I was like, okay, but don't try anything. Cause I, you know, I really wanted to take things nice and slow with him. And um, and he was like, of course, of course that, of course not. So, um, so I got to sleep in his bed and I wake up around like, Maybe three in the morning and our turn and he's not there. And I thought that was really weird.
Like where is he? And then, um, I go back to sleep and then I wake up again around like four and, um, and there's a green apple next to my bedside. And, um, I grabbed it and I eat it. And I was sleeping next to me and I wake up in the morning and he tells me that he woke up at like two or three in the morning and he realized that he didn't have any apples.
And so you wanted to make sure when I woke up in the middle of the night that I had my apple, and so he went out at like two in the morning, he went to the first, uh, like seven 11, and they didn't have any apples. So he had to go to like two or three different stores to find something that was open that had green apples.
And he finally around the second or third gas station found an apple. And brought it back. And, um, so I would wake up to an apple and, uh, yeah, that's 10 years later. We're still together.
i think it’s a direct transcript from the tiktok. but i agree the bp editors should do their jobs
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Despite the ... difficult read, this is a very sweet story. Summery: she has a quirk where she wakes in the middle of the night and has to eat a green apple, half asleep and then go back to bed. On the 4th date she told him and because of circumstances she slept over at his apartment (without anything happening between them). She wakes in the middle of the night, he is not there. She goes back to sleep. She wakes again and there is a green apple on her bedside table. He woke up in the middle of the night and realized he had no green apples, so he went out to get one for her and had to go to x different 7/11 and gas stations before he found one.
This was painful to read, also so much for censoring every little thing then missing the f bomb lol
To make it easier to read. OP has had a quirk of eating a green apple half asleep since age 6. They mentioned this to their at the time BF and on the 4th date they stayed the night (due to it being very late). They woke up at one point to find the BF missing before falling back asleep. They woke up again to find a green apple on the bed side table. Come morning the BF explains how they woke up realizing they didnt have green apples so they went to multiple places to find one for her to wake up to and eat
I'm sorry, all I can focus on is "I have this weird cork". She repeats the word later...does she mean "quirk"?
Pretty sure that's what she meant. That is one for r/boneappletea
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For anyone who wanted to read this but just couldn't....for....reasons.... here you go: This person wakes up between 2am and 4am everyday, eats a green apple and goes back to sleep. She's been doing this since she was 6 or 7. She's in her 30s now. When she and her now husband, Steven, of 10 years was on their fourth date, she slept over at his apartment for the first time. She wakes up at around 3am, he's not there. Goes back to sleep, wakes up again at 4am and there is a green apple next to her bedside. Point of story : Stephen was so thoughtful that he went to 3 or 4 stores in the middle of the night / early morning hours to get her a green apple after realizing that he didn't have any apples in the house, in case she wakes up. Woohoo for Steven and they are still together. You're welcome.
I need to eat three green apples now, 'cause I got tired from reading this. That was hard girl.
He didn’t laugh at me when I get scared in horror movies, he helps me cover my eyes so I can cover my ears, he tells me when it’s safe to look again.
When he detaches from cuddling he says “ok I’m turning over now” instead of silently pushing away.
My ex used to give me a little extra goodbye squeeze just before he rolled over.
I’m a flight attendant and he’s a private pilot. We live in different states. This man used his own plane to fly up and see me for our first date.
Non-sexual physical touch. He kisses my hand when we part from each other, holds my hands. Ngl I cried inside
When he made my problems his. He cried with me when I cried. Laughed with me when I laughed
He doesn’t get uncomfortable when I cry, but actually pulls me closer and wipes my tears. A few weeks in to dating, I had a panic attack talking about
he cooks dinner for me all the time, surprises me with little gifts or dates, always wants to talk about how to make the relationship better.
He’s paid my bills multiple times and never ever brings it up. he’s forgotten he has. it’s not something he holds over me
He was upset.I didn't ask for his help. When me and my husband were dating, I had trouble keeping up with a car payment. I told him nothing. I eventually had to return this vehicle and when he found out... When I tell you this man was upset and it just... he didn't understand why I didn't ask him for help.
He was livid you all, like, it just did not make sense to him how I would not think to say anything. And that's when I realized I had been accepting too much less, like, I didn't want to ask, because I was used to booboo's who would make me feel like I was a gold digger or something, and not just a girl that just needed help.
And, um, that's also when I realized my husband was the greatest man I ever met.
Note: this post originally had 48 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.
In the post, woman says her car has no heat,A/C or radio, so she drives his car...what the hell woman, why don't you fix your car?
I'm also concerned that she didn't decline his offer. It's as if it's ok to have the man suffer on your behalf. That doesn't sound like true love from her side.
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His reactions whenever I have health problems, I can see he cares. He told me I could have one of his kidneys if it comes to this (and he was serious). When I was surprised by a literally debilitating migraine, he immediately helped me regain my senses, dressed me up, carried me to the car (we live on the 4th floor of an apartment building with no lift, and I'm 178cm of height) and drove me to the hospital. Years ago, when we were students, when we first moved home together, his priority was to make sure the place was heated well to keep me warm. I could go on and on.
Maybe I am getting the wrong message from this thread, but it sure looks like many women expect the males in their lives to be totally selfish and egoistic jerks, and when they are not, they consider it a rare accomplishment. I wouldn’t know, because I don't speak for all men and sure as hell I am not qualified to speak for all women, but a lot of what I read boiled down to common courtesy. The Patriarchy has always been a bane for women, and hopefully we are on the way of correcting that, but on the women's part, it would probably be a good idea to be upfront when dealing with men that behave as if women were placed on Earth to please and amuse their ego, clean the house and wash the dishes. Drop them like a bad habit and maybe they'll eventually get the message. Treating women as human beings is not worthy of a prize. Of course, the reverse is also true. It looks to me as if we all have a ways to go (no offence or judgment on some of the truly sweet stories here).
I'm an avid Pokemon Go player and soon to be 80. One evening last year I still needed to walk 2 kilometers for the game. I was tired, it was late and raining. He took my phone and walked around til he was sure he had walked the distance I needed. Two Christmases ago he drove me to special invitation only raid and stood out in the snow storm with me til I finished. He is my greatest supporter and truly happy I finally am having fun at my age.
Just accepting a no, or not trying to manipulate me. You'd think those would be givens, but it really isn't.
Chivalry may not be dead but the true intentions are not what we think they are in fairy tales. I've been told by my ex-bf and his friends that a guy will only do nice things and say what you want to hear to get in your panties. I don't like to believe all men are the same, as not all women are the same, but it's stuck with me since and now I can't help but doubt any man is genuine with their niceties. I give a lot in a relationship. Heck, I've unwisely sacrificed more than I should just to get a few back massages and the odd cheap treat that any of these women would find "so considerate and sweet". Don't set the bar low and don't give everything up. Work for yourself and work together. But never work for just them. And I mean that mutually.
As a man of a certain age, I have been around the block and, having served in the military, I maybe circled a few blocks more than most. Yes, men talk, and unfortunately, many act terribly. Trump's "Locker room talk" is something every male has heard at some point. Men in their late teens and early 20 are the worst. Men in a men-only org. like the military (in my time) are even more obnoxious, and treat sexual conquest like trophies. Many do it because they concede to peer pressure, others because they are indeed as despicable as their tales of conquest convey. For my part, I always found it oncouth and vulgar, and I tried to keep away from such men, but since they aim is to receive validation from their peer, it's often hard to escape. Not all men are like that, but far too many grow up with that entitlement.
Load More Replies... Not trying to sound cynical or pour cold water, but love bombing can also look like this. I've experienced many of these at the start of a relationship with someone who turned out to be narcissistic and controlling. My advice is always, always give it at least two years before you judge, commit, share finances or bring children into the world.
You can also find men and women that have totally unrealistic expectations, that no one alive could possibly fulfil.
I still have no expectations and that’s fine, because no one with any expectations of their own would want me
If your partner / boyfriend / girlfriend / husband / wife / friends with benefits aren’t able to see your value (or you can’t see theirs) then you need to work on it, communicate, be open to new ideas, be available and ensure that you get to a point where you both value each other’s place in the relationship. If you value each other then you’ll find the way to breed happiness and to put the energy into helping each other through tough times, you will talk about your hopes and fears, you’ll both protect each other from the fears and you’ll encourage the dreams and hopes to become reality. You are always equal but sometimes you give to the relationship, sometimes you take, you’ll always know that you don’t need to keep count because you both have each other’s back. If you can’t find your partners value then it’s time to do something about it, it’s up to you to decide what but don’t do nothing, you are worth more than that. Oh yeah, laugh too, it helps A LOT.
After my first marriage ended, I realized I put up with too much for two long (decades.) I chose a man with a temper like my dad. That was normal to me. I went to therapy (still do,) and I'm in a healthy marriage now. If you think you have a "bad picker" therapy will help you from repeating the patterns. I know a lot of women who cycle through bad guys but don't ever do anything to change it. It's sad. I wish I had done it sooner.
If these guys are being this nice and caring, I guess the answer is yes. These men are no fools, if they go the extra mile, it's because it's worth it, no?
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Okay, some of these are downright adorable, but some of them are a pretty low bar. Holding hands, accepting no as an answer, holding you when you cry. This is relationship 101 stuff. If this is the bar that most guys are setting, I'm ashamed to be associated with them. Up your game dudes. Cooking dinner should not be an exceptional gesture. This post should be nothing but green apple stories and above. Shameful.
i was dating this guy in high school, then moved to another state. we had broken up but still talked on the phone. 4 years later, my mum had a psychotic break and i was only 19 and didn't have anyone to help me. he asked if i needed him to be there and i said yes. a week later he left everything he ever knew behind to be with me and support me. we got married a month later and have been married for almost 22 years now.
This is a thread about men who do good. Who are kind. Who pay attention to their partners. And yet the title suggests that these men aren’t the majority. I find that distressingly sexist. The majority of men are nice. The scrummy ones are not the majority. Stop insinuating that men are negligent and emotionally blind by default.
I thik they dived in the internet and found this :( it's not us but is our representation
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We’d be livid if Bored Panda did a piece on how men realized they could have been treated better by women. I’m all for respect and caring, but for all partners, regardless of gender. It seems to be okay on social media to dump on or make fun of men as a group. It’s not okay for women, and it’s not okay for men.
Actually, I think that would be beneficial if men spoke about how their girlfriends and wives cared for them and treated them with respect. There is a lot of misogyny on the internet that paints women as golddiggers, selfish bitches, cheaters and liars. There needs to be a lot more about how women are real people and do nice stuff. A lot more. Or the Andrew Tates of this world will claim a lot more young men.
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I was a serial dater ever since I got to go off to university in 2010. Every guy I dated until about 2019 was between 2.5-1 years of dating. Since Nicky Manage (or however you spell it,) came out with that interview where she basically said [I know my worth and I'm not going to settle], I've been telling guys the same. Lots of one months and maybe even 5 month relationships, lots of instant "I love you"s, but no real relationships. I don't have any qualms about it, I just wonder...
After 5 years of being together with my now husband, i realized whatever I do or say he's copy-paste. If I'm angry, he will be angry, if I'm calm he will be calm. If we get into an argument, i realized if I apologize he will apologize too haha. When I'm cleaning he cleans with me, the same goes for other things like cooking, hanging and ironing laundry. If i fold his clothes one day, he folds mine the next haha. If i don't do those things he doesn't either.
I'd just be happy to show one woman 30 things I do and more that she knows I'm the one for her.
Sounds like this guy needs to run. If you don't agree, switch the genders of the people. Then you see that she is taking and taking in this relationship and not really giving back (based on the information given, you can suppose all you want, but just sticking with the data we have).
I hate to tell you ladies this, but consideration, respect, carefully thinking through a situation to weigh possible outcomes, and prudence are all LEARNED BEHAVIOURS... unless you were fortunate enough to hit the parents/family lotto and got somebody for family who instinctively practices these things, you will have to learn all of this by trial & error on your own... Most men that I know at 20-23 are rude, selfish, inconsiderate, bossy, & pushy with no consideration for anyone but themselves. Come back and visit with that guy again 5 or 10 years down the road, and if he has learned his life lessons well, he will be a much better person... Hey ladies, this goes for you too... Don't hate me for saying so, but there are a lot of women that have this profile also... Growing up is hard to do. Sometimes it takes a rude "slap-in-the-face" wake-up call like a painful divorce to finally get a person to come to terms with certain realities about their own personal character flaws and to stop blaming the other person all the time. Grow up, please, anyone reading this who is fuming right now... Yes, I just pushed Many Buttons.... eep, eep, eep, eep, oh the alarms are going off now!
To be fair, everything you said can easily be applied to women as well.
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well. the point is, that men need to prove themselves to women, in every turn. because women are always nice and men are bad. that's the narrative that sells here in BP anyway. but it takes two to tango, and any and every relationship goes both ways...I usually skip this, because is just a echo-chamber that only confirm what women choose to think and is no point in discussing it...but honestly, women are just as selfish and self-centred as men...and this is the prove, the threat is not about relationships, is about women wanting their partners life to be about them...but who cares anybody who might disagree is an incel anyway and is no point to argue anything in those terms
No wonder you aren't expecting positive responses. I've already said there's nothing wrong with the above example if it 'was the other way around': still good healthy behaviours, provided they go both ways in the partnership. And I'll bet you are expecting the worst responses for "Definitely a man need sex from woman. But give your 0.01% of your time for sex and think equally about, that he has metal stress and tiredness too". And you deserve negativity: you clearly already know this. What if I told you that because of the same reason, men needing sex, all hetero men like yourself I'm guessing will be scheduled for mandatory buggery from gay men who need sex too. C'mon Bobby, give 0.01% of your time for his mental stress and tiredness, right? It's the least you can do! Support your fellow man Bobby, balls deep! Wait, is that not something you are happy to do, because it's your duty as a man with an a**s? Remember, you can't choose the guy as it's not about you, it's your 'duty' or whatever
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That's up to her partner to write about, don't you think so? It would sound like bragging if she did.
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In the post, woman says her car has no heat,A/C or radio, so she drives his car...what the hell woman, why don't you fix your car?
I'm also concerned that she didn't decline his offer. It's as if it's ok to have the man suffer on your behalf. That doesn't sound like true love from her side.
Load More Replies... His reactions whenever I have health problems, I can see he cares. He told me I could have one of his kidneys if it comes to this (and he was serious). When I was surprised by a literally debilitating migraine, he immediately helped me regain my senses, dressed me up, carried me to the car (we live on the 4th floor of an apartment building with no lift, and I'm 178cm of height) and drove me to the hospital. Years ago, when we were students, when we first moved home together, his priority was to make sure the place was heated well to keep me warm. I could go on and on.
Maybe I am getting the wrong message from this thread, but it sure looks like many women expect the males in their lives to be totally selfish and egoistic jerks, and when they are not, they consider it a rare accomplishment. I wouldn’t know, because I don't speak for all men and sure as hell I am not qualified to speak for all women, but a lot of what I read boiled down to common courtesy. The Patriarchy has always been a bane for women, and hopefully we are on the way of correcting that, but on the women's part, it would probably be a good idea to be upfront when dealing with men that behave as if women were placed on Earth to please and amuse their ego, clean the house and wash the dishes. Drop them like a bad habit and maybe they'll eventually get the message. Treating women as human beings is not worthy of a prize. Of course, the reverse is also true. It looks to me as if we all have a ways to go (no offence or judgment on some of the truly sweet stories here).
I'm an avid Pokemon Go player and soon to be 80. One evening last year I still needed to walk 2 kilometers for the game. I was tired, it was late and raining. He took my phone and walked around til he was sure he had walked the distance I needed. Two Christmases ago he drove me to special invitation only raid and stood out in the snow storm with me til I finished. He is my greatest supporter and truly happy I finally am having fun at my age.
Just accepting a no, or not trying to manipulate me. You'd think those would be givens, but it really isn't.
Chivalry may not be dead but the true intentions are not what we think they are in fairy tales. I've been told by my ex-bf and his friends that a guy will only do nice things and say what you want to hear to get in your panties. I don't like to believe all men are the same, as not all women are the same, but it's stuck with me since and now I can't help but doubt any man is genuine with their niceties. I give a lot in a relationship. Heck, I've unwisely sacrificed more than I should just to get a few back massages and the odd cheap treat that any of these women would find "so considerate and sweet". Don't set the bar low and don't give everything up. Work for yourself and work together. But never work for just them. And I mean that mutually.
As a man of a certain age, I have been around the block and, having served in the military, I maybe circled a few blocks more than most. Yes, men talk, and unfortunately, many act terribly. Trump's "Locker room talk" is something every male has heard at some point. Men in their late teens and early 20 are the worst. Men in a men-only org. like the military (in my time) are even more obnoxious, and treat sexual conquest like trophies. Many do it because they concede to peer pressure, others because they are indeed as despicable as their tales of conquest convey. For my part, I always found it oncouth and vulgar, and I tried to keep away from such men, but since they aim is to receive validation from their peer, it's often hard to escape. Not all men are like that, but far too many grow up with that entitlement.
Load More Replies... Not trying to sound cynical or pour cold water, but love bombing can also look like this. I've experienced many of these at the start of a relationship with someone who turned out to be narcissistic and controlling. My advice is always, always give it at least two years before you judge, commit, share finances or bring children into the world.
You can also find men and women that have totally unrealistic expectations, that no one alive could possibly fulfil.
I still have no expectations and that’s fine, because no one with any expectations of their own would want me
If your partner / boyfriend / girlfriend / husband / wife / friends with benefits aren’t able to see your value (or you can’t see theirs) then you need to work on it, communicate, be open to new ideas, be available and ensure that you get to a point where you both value each other’s place in the relationship. If you value each other then you’ll find the way to breed happiness and to put the energy into helping each other through tough times, you will talk about your hopes and fears, you’ll both protect each other from the fears and you’ll encourage the dreams and hopes to become reality. You are always equal but sometimes you give to the relationship, sometimes you take, you’ll always know that you don’t need to keep count because you both have each other’s back. If you can’t find your partners value then it’s time to do something about it, it’s up to you to decide what but don’t do nothing, you are worth more than that. Oh yeah, laugh too, it helps A LOT.
After my first marriage ended, I realized I put up with too much for two long (decades.) I chose a man with a temper like my dad. That was normal to me. I went to therapy (still do,) and I'm in a healthy marriage now. If you think you have a "bad picker" therapy will help you from repeating the patterns. I know a lot of women who cycle through bad guys but don't ever do anything to change it. It's sad. I wish I had done it sooner.
If these guys are being this nice and caring, I guess the answer is yes. These men are no fools, if they go the extra mile, it's because it's worth it, no?
Load More Replies... Okay, some of these are downright adorable, but some of them are a pretty low bar. Holding hands, accepting no as an answer, holding you when you cry. This is relationship 101 stuff. If this is the bar that most guys are setting, I'm ashamed to be associated with them. Up your game dudes. Cooking dinner should not be an exceptional gesture. This post should be nothing but green apple stories and above. Shameful.
i was dating this guy in high school, then moved to another state. we had broken up but still talked on the phone. 4 years later, my mum had a psychotic break and i was only 19 and didn't have anyone to help me. he asked if i needed him to be there and i said yes. a week later he left everything he ever knew behind to be with me and support me. we got married a month later and have been married for almost 22 years now.
This is a thread about men who do good. Who are kind. Who pay attention to their partners. And yet the title suggests that these men aren’t the majority. I find that distressingly sexist. The majority of men are nice. The scrummy ones are not the majority. Stop insinuating that men are negligent and emotionally blind by default.
I thik they dived in the internet and found this :( it's not us but is our representation
Load More Replies... We’d be livid if Bored Panda did a piece on how men realized they could have been treated better by women. I’m all for respect and caring, but for all partners, regardless of gender. It seems to be okay on social media to dump on or make fun of men as a group. It’s not okay for women, and it’s not okay for men.
Actually, I think that would be beneficial if men spoke about how their girlfriends and wives cared for them and treated them with respect. There is a lot of misogyny on the internet that paints women as golddiggers, selfish bitches, cheaters and liars. There needs to be a lot more about how women are real people and do nice stuff. A lot more. Or the Andrew Tates of this world will claim a lot more young men.
Load More Replies... I was a serial dater ever since I got to go off to university in 2010. Every guy I dated until about 2019 was between 2.5-1 years of dating. Since Nicky Manage (or however you spell it,) came out with that interview where she basically said [I know my worth and I'm not going to settle], I've been telling guys the same. Lots of one months and maybe even 5 month relationships, lots of instant "I love you"s, but no real relationships. I don't have any qualms about it, I just wonder...
After 5 years of being together with my now husband, i realized whatever I do or say he's copy-paste. If I'm angry, he will be angry, if I'm calm he will be calm. If we get into an argument, i realized if I apologize he will apologize too haha. When I'm cleaning he cleans with me, the same goes for other things like cooking, hanging and ironing laundry. If i fold his clothes one day, he folds mine the next haha. If i don't do those things he doesn't either.
I'd just be happy to show one woman 30 things I do and more that she knows I'm the one for her.
Sounds like this guy needs to run. If you don't agree, switch the genders of the people. Then you see that she is taking and taking in this relationship and not really giving back (based on the information given, you can suppose all you want, but just sticking with the data we have).
I hate to tell you ladies this, but consideration, respect, carefully thinking through a situation to weigh possible outcomes, and prudence are all LEARNED BEHAVIOURS... unless you were fortunate enough to hit the parents/family lotto and got somebody for family who instinctively practices these things, you will have to learn all of this by trial & error on your own... Most men that I know at 20-23 are rude, selfish, inconsiderate, bossy, & pushy with no consideration for anyone but themselves. Come back and visit with that guy again 5 or 10 years down the road, and if he has learned his life lessons well, he will be a much better person... Hey ladies, this goes for you too... Don't hate me for saying so, but there are a lot of women that have this profile also... Growing up is hard to do. Sometimes it takes a rude "slap-in-the-face" wake-up call like a painful divorce to finally get a person to come to terms with certain realities about their own personal character flaws and to stop blaming the other person all the time. Grow up, please, anyone reading this who is fuming right now... Yes, I just pushed Many Buttons.... eep, eep, eep, eep, oh the alarms are going off now!
To be fair, everything you said can easily be applied to women as well.
Load More Replies... well. the point is, that men need to prove themselves to women, in every turn. because women are always nice and men are bad. that's the narrative that sells here in BP anyway. but it takes two to tango, and any and every relationship goes both ways...I usually skip this, because is just a echo-chamber that only confirm what women choose to think and is no point in discussing it...but honestly, women are just as selfish and self-centred as men...and this is the prove, the threat is not about relationships, is about women wanting their partners life to be about them...but who cares anybody who might disagree is an incel anyway and is no point to argue anything in those terms
No wonder you aren't expecting positive responses. I've already said there's nothing wrong with the above example if it 'was the other way around': still good healthy behaviours, provided they go both ways in the partnership. And I'll bet you are expecting the worst responses for "Definitely a man need sex from woman. But give your 0.01% of your time for sex and think equally about, that he has metal stress and tiredness too". And you deserve negativity: you clearly already know this. What if I told you that because of the same reason, men needing sex, all hetero men like yourself I'm guessing will be scheduled for mandatory buggery from gay men who need sex too. C'mon Bobby, give 0.01% of your time for his mental stress and tiredness, right? It's the least you can do! Support your fellow man Bobby, balls deep! Wait, is that not something you are happy to do, because it's your duty as a man with an a**s? Remember, you can't choose the guy as it's not about you, it's your 'duty' or whatever
Load More Replies... That's up to her partner to write about, don't you think so? It would sound like bragging if she did.
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