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Dating and relationships are difficult even on a good day. And good days are pretty rare. Unfortunately, that is the reality everyone lives in when navigating the romantic world. Especially women. But at least they have a place to vent.

The subreddit r/FemaleDatingStrategy has 175K members (or as it calls them, queens), constantly discussing their love lives, and that includes all the nonsense that arises too. Continue scrolling and check out what they have to say.

#1

Men Only Bringing The Audacity, Yet Again, To The Table!

Men Only Bringing The Audacity, Yet Again, To The Table!

placemat24 Report

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BlackestDawn
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Took me a sec to realize it, but good going. You have to consider yourself first.

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To help you get a better understanding of these posts, Bored Panda got in touch with dating coach, 2 million view TED speaker, and media personality Hayley Quinn. She believes that "dating is different for men and women. However, you'd be wrong to think that one gender has it easy."

"Instead men and women often face equal and opposite problems to one another," Quinn said. "Guys might struggle to think of how to approach a woman, and women (who traditionally and maybe wrongly) have been told they can't make the first move and so panic over where they can find all the guys that want to approach them."

#2

Say It Louder For The People In The Back!!

Say It Louder For The People In The Back!!

Twohagsover30 , ghvstbvr Report

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denzoren
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've never understood this...if you lose control over what a woman wears then you need some serious help. The problem definitely isn't the clothes.

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In the world of online dating, Quinn also sees noticeable disparities. "Guys may feel like they're having to move heaven and earth to get one lousy response from a woman, whilst women can feel overwhelmed and harassed by unsuitable suitors," she explained. "Men could usually learn from women that they need to have higher standards for the women they interact with, and women could take a leaf out of men's dating and learn how they too can be proactive."

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#4

Some Men Need To Learn This

Some Men Need To Learn This

anonymous , taragroves05 Report

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BingeFest1
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This goes for everybody. Treat others the way you want to be treated

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In 2020, the Pew Research Center surveyed Americans to find out more about their love life. While single-and-looking men and women reported equal levels of dissatisfaction with their dating lives and the ease of finding people to date, women were more likely to say they have had some particularly negative experiences.

Most women who were single and looking to date (65%) said they have experienced at least one of six harassing behaviors asked about in the survey from someone they were dating or had been on a date with, such as being touched in a way that made them uncomfortable or rumors being spread about their sexual history.

#6

Oops

Oops

PBJellyNutella Report

"Though men might think women have guys queuing up to date them (which sounds great right?) in reality women face plenty of dating challenges," Quinn said. "They may feel emotionally drained by dating, as they push through dates where they don't feel a connection. If they're seeking a relationship they may struggle to tell which guy's going to be in for the long haul, and who will disappear at the first inkling of commitment. They may even not know how to get offline and actually meet men in real life; and get stuck in the belief that all the 'good men' have run out, and it's impossible to meet someone."

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The dating coach added that women also face significantly more judgement around things like their age, which can be a challenge on dating apps; and more scrutiny for expressing their sexuality. "So don't think that just because she's got a queue of potential suitors that she's not having a hard time dating."

We all can be douches to one another. Let's not.

#8

That Really Puts It In Perspective

That Really Puts It In Perspective

Descendant_of_Innana Report

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Nadine Bamberger
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And it's always on us, don't dress that way, don't walk there, don't provoke. When it happens we didn't fight enough, fought too hard, didn't say no, didn't mean it when we said it. If we report it we get blamed, re traumatized by questions and rape kits that are then left untouched, called liars.

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#11

100% True For Me

100% True For Me

cinderella_rising , PatrickStrud Report

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Legen ( wait for it ) dary
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I feel a drop off interest on men (thanks a lot) when I say my husband is a police officer or a jujitsu master.

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#14

They Will Always Make “Single Mothers” The Villains To Shift Blame From Male Predators Or Male Parental Child Neglect

They Will Always Make “Single Mothers” The Villains To Shift Blame From Male Predators Or Male Parental Child Neglect

TheOGJammies , blackwomensday Report

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#15

Speaks For Itself

Speaks For Itself

yggiwtmiih Report

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Ana
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm still thinking about the time women had to use hat pins to defend themselves from handsy men. They were covered in fabric from head to tow. It's never about the way you dress, it's about being decent.

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#16

Perfect Way To Deal With Their “Jokes”

Perfect Way To Deal With Their “Jokes”

copingwithsht Report

#17

Be A Hvm In All Aspects Of Life

Be A Hvm In All Aspects Of Life

OhDionne , OhDionne Report

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Rachel Peterson
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I always support the allies, reminding them how much I value them.

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#18

How Many Of You “Developed” Issues While In A Relationship? I’ll Go First: Depression And Anxiety. Cured As Soon As We Broke Up

How Many Of You “Developed” Issues While In A Relationship? I’ll Go First: Depression And Anxiety. Cured As Soon As We Broke Up

anonymous , AmySilverberg Report

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K Witmer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mom was convinced she was just a miserable person. She eloped w my dad when she was 15 he was 19. She was 25 when she got divorced she then realized she was a very outgoing extrovert that loved to smile and be herself

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Leo Domitrix
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My one grandpa died and there wasn't a wet eye in the house. Including his widow. Forty-nine years of marriage, and nobody cried at the funeral. Grandma promptly expanded her life, took over her life, and kicked a** in her life.

kayblue avatar
Kay blue
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There are plenty of people who still believe you shouldn't speak ill of the dead. If someone was an ass in life, being dead doesn't change that. There are two people on the periphery of my life who I will not mourn when they die.

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willi santiago
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I stopped biting my nails the day my ex left. Didn't even realize right away.

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Edison Michael
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This reminded me of that famous picture of Nicole Kidman leaving her lawyers office after signing her divorce papers from that weirdo, Tom Cruise. I don't think I ever felt half as ecstatic in my life as she looks in that one picture.

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Terilee Bruyere
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My stress triggered IBS went away and I was able to get off prescription benzos completely after the split with my husband. Too often the 'supportive partner' is in reality the one causing all the strife.

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Mazer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My poor aunt suffered tremendously from her marriage. She was an exceptional human being: wickedly smart and funny, hella talented, kind, caring, compassionate, etc. The most positive thing I can say about my uncle he had the personality of a slide rule

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Gabby M
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Here are I few I have used in the past. 1) Personality of a dial tone / doorbell 2) Personality of wet card board

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SlartyBlartFast
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I went through this, so I can understand. It takes a lot of effort sometimes to find the strength, as well as courage to save yourself from a bad relationship.

edc_82 avatar
Lola
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That’s because the more time you spend with them, the more damage they cause. It’s easy to fall into that trap. Not so easy to get out. Not if they have slowly killed your self esteem.

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Leigh C.
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I thought I had a volatile relationship with my mom. Turns out it was my ex. It did get bad with my mom but at least I don't have someone fueling the hate.

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Donna Martin
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I thought I had depression, then I got divorced. Turns out the only depression was sitting on the other side of the room all along.

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JustAnother Soul
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was suicidal and depressed, fearful and suffered anxiety and insomnia. Then I left my horribly abusive husband and his family and the cure was almost instant.

mcalad avatar
M Calad
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh.my.god.yes! I was in a 3.5 years relationship where I was to believe I was emotionally unstable, developed anxiety disorder and felt miserable. Two weeks after finally breaking up (we broke up 3 times before), I felt a radiance building up inside. The next months on my own, healing and getting therapy, I felt the best and happiest I had felt in years and realized my problems had a name and it wasn't mine.

dk_5 avatar
D K
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ohhhh man. My ex bf physically assaulted me, was taken away by the cops and 30 day restraining order immediately in place. After the first 2 weeks of residual ptsd effects, I started to feel better than I did before I met him. As soon as the 30 days were up, BOOM. A love-bombing pseudo—apologetic text from him wanting to “make it up to me.” My anxiety is now through the roof, again.

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Nannychachi
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Been there, lived that for 20 years. Be smarter than me. Stay away from him

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Lyn Moffett
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I felt about 14 stone (dunno what that is in metric) when I left my ex. Carrying him daily and taking his crap finally wore me down.

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Paul Mitchell
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had that when I got divorced. She was besides herself with depression; I was just happy to be away from the emotional and financial abuse. I was told I was chronically depressed... I was just constantly oppressed.

ljdia avatar
Lj
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I feel you. Congratulations on having the strength to free yourself! It’s about self-value, sel-respect. We want people that pull us up in our lives, that contribute to our happiness.

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Gerry Higgins
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This goes both ways. Many men feel better after a break up as well. Toxic people exist in all genders.

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Rens
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I went through 42 years without ending up admitting myself to a mental hospital because I was suicidal. Funny how I only became suicidal after meeting my (now ex) abusive boyfriend.

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Kitti B.
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I started to have really bad insomnia. I even used therapy, went to group sessions. My friends, family AND colleagues noticed something was really off with me. During Christmas I was crying. Then I decided to break up wit my boyfriend. As soon as I said "we are done" to him, I instantly felt better and I didn't need therapy anymore. So I know the feeling.

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Auntriarch
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My brother came out of his marriage with a coffee machine and an eating disorder. He's still struggling, 11 years later.

kittibarna avatar
Kitti B.
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Did he get theraphy? 11 years is way too long to stuck in a phase like that. :(

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ispeak catanese
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was rabidly angry and miserable for years. It all went away after the divorce.

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Robert Thompson
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yep. What a weight off my mind (and life) when I got out of an abusive relationship about 3 years ago.

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Azure Adams
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yup been there and done that. Anxiety really cleared when I decided to live honestly and for myself too.

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Bee
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

With my ex boyfriend, it was 9 months of verbal, emotional, and sexual abuse. I wasn't happy but I was pretending to be. After we broke up, I got in therapy and enrolled in school. I'm months away from graduating while he's an unemployed aspiring "rapper"

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Pamela Blue
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I wish. I put up with bulls^&t for 41 years. Way too long for the anxiety disorder to just disappear. I'm more relaxed now that he's an ex, but only indoors. I really don't want to go anywhere anymore. It's sad, but at my age, I feel it's too late to reverse.

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Bettie-Jean Neal
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was hoping my anxiety would stop when I got my divorce. Now I suffer from PTSD and still have the anxiety as well.

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Jason Boling
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah that goes both ways...plenty of toxic women in the world.

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ThoughtsAreNotFacts
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, people who don't know think it sounds so heartless. Are we cousins? Lol

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Nadine Bamberger
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I get what you're saying but please be careful with this. Depressions often develop regardless of the circumstances, of course they can make it worse/better but it is about a chemical imbalance that can't be cured by dumping a boyfriend. That could put pressure on a depressed friend like he's gone so just pull yourself together and be happy already.

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Kat
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It isn't always chemical imbalance, it can very well be feeling unsatisfied, mistreated etc in a relationship.

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2 years ago

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So men wouldn't experience this too?

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Terilee Bruyere
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They absolutely can, and do. Most dating or relationship problems happen to men and women, this post just happens to be about women.

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Victoria Pitt
Community Member
2 years ago

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Well... Being in the wrong relationship can definitely cause anxiety and depression but you can't really put the blame on the other person. We need to be in touch with our own emotions and recognize that if a situation is causing us mental anguish, we should change it.

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Lola
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It is not as easy as you make it out to be. Everyone’s story is different. Sometimes people are not able to leave their significant other. Your comment is uncalled for in this post.

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#20

Hvm Right There. Take Note Scrotes

Hvm Right There. Take Note Scrotes

Big-Paleontologist13 Report

#22

Nothing But Truth

Nothing But Truth

ScarletFate779 Report

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Dennis Troelsen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

i'm just going to assume that most here are Americans, being from denmark myself i have been to parties (in denmark) sitting or standing next to a few women and they end up talking sex good and bad experiances partners and so on and never have i thought anything shaming about them but good for them that they have been curious and learned a few things like one i remember very clearly when trying a**l ALWAYS remember lube and lots of it and take time, most of this shaming comes from bad parenting and trying to be the cool/alpha male, bad boy, and for my part korrect if some guy i knew started to brag about rape i would not shame him he would (maybe) wake up in the hospital at some point.

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#26

This Almost Makes Me Want To Redownload Dating Apps To Do The Same!

This Almost Makes Me Want To Redownload Dating Apps To Do The Same!

jfk31989 Report

#27

Even A 35 Yo Man Has These Same Meltdowns But They're The Logical Sex!!!

Even A 35 Yo Man Has These Same Meltdowns But They're The Logical Sex!!!

_xyoungbellax_ , iamaroadtrip Report

#28

Watch The Way Men Treat Women They're Not Attracted To

Watch The Way Men Treat Women They're Not Attracted To

Lucifers_Treasurer Report

#29

The Message

The Message

Brown_chick45 Report

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Mazer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Choose to empower your kids by considering them now and in the future. Spot on

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#30

Mom Praising Son-In-Law For The Bare Minimum

Mom Praising Son-In-Law For The Bare Minimum

sassyheather Report

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ZooMom
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband stayed with our kids as infants while I worked. Everyone went on and on about how amazing he was (and he was) but then we switched roles this past year and I hear how “lucky I am to GET to stay home” and how bad they feel he works long hours. B****! I pumped breast milk on the floor of a unisex bathroom while still taking phone calls.

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#31

Why Are Males?

Why Are Males?

MarbleWorld , EazyBreezyJay Report

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Caro Caro
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would call him out, get management and then call the cops! Effing dirty slob.

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#32

Leave Him In The Dust

Leave Him In The Dust

cinderella_rising , efowlz Report

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El muerto
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

some time it bothers me, some women think they don't have a choice because they are in love.

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#33

This Is Why We Can’t Even Trust The “Good” Guys

This Is Why We Can’t Even Trust The “Good” Guys

elementalvirago , sarahradz_ Report

#34

Keep Your Friends Safe!

Keep Your Friends Safe!

reddit.com , AthenaBozios Report

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#35

Used Or New, We Will Run You Over

Used Or New, We Will Run You Over

reddit.com Report

#36

Thoughts?

Thoughts?

liondale , BIndlovukazi Report

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BingeFest1
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If I ever actually find somebody I'd want to marry I would never propose with anybody around. I would want to eliminate any peer pressure and create an intimate environment

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#37

Instead Of Holding Rapists/Harassers Accountable, He Mocks Women For Trying To Protect Themselves. A True Pos

Instead Of Holding Rapists/Harassers Accountable, He Mocks Women For Trying To Protect Themselves. A True Pos

reddit.com Report

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Xottel
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's not about locating the witness. It's about scaring the bad guy by becoming a potential witness. Some women even resort to making fake calls on their way home. I'd say it stops at least some horrible people so that's an improvement.

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#38

Henry Viii's Wives If They'd Never Met Him

Henry Viii's Wives If They'd Never Met Him

Zayelle Report

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Ana
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I still think Anne of Cleves got the best deal. She didn't have to remain married to Henry VIII and even got a sweet castle and money to boot and she never ever had to get married again.

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#39

Thought This Belongs Here. (From Selfawarewolves... Men Are So Close, I Can't Decide If They're Ignorant On Purpose Or Genuinely Can't Grasp Basic Concepts)

Thought This Belongs Here. (From Selfawarewolves... Men Are So Close, I Can't Decide If They're Ignorant On Purpose Or Genuinely Can't Grasp Basic Concepts)

therebellioustiger Report

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Lauren Caswell
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sounds like the guy who yells "hey pretty lady" and approaches a woman they don't know, and when she "walks fast" to get away or tells him to stop, she has a "bad attitude"

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#40

Being In You 20’s Should Be About Self Development, Your Eduction And To Lay The Foundation For Financial Independence

Being In You 20’s Should Be About Self Development, Your Eduction And To Lay The Foundation For Financial Independence

Shefthegooddog , iamsedem_ Report

#41

Most Stay-At-Moms Do Not Get The Luxury Of Building A Career, Or Even The Luxury Of A Personal Life This Is How Women End Up In A Financial Trap With No Support

Most Stay-At-Moms Do Not Get The Luxury Of Building A Career, Or Even The Luxury Of A Personal Life This Is How Women End Up In A Financial Trap With No Support

Journalist_Full , BridgieCasey Report

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fire bug
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ummmm... my wife and I support our family. I work long hours. My wife takes care of 90% of the household stuff. I clean the kitchen every night and get home by dinner time every night to have family time with her and our kids. I don't support her and she doesn't support me. We support each other.

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#43

Tea

Tea

Descendant_of_Innana , skatingstoned Report

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QueenMiri
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Women who could tell stories about crazy ex boyfriends rarely make it out alive. That's why you only hear about crazy ex girlfriends.

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#44

Seriously

Seriously

normabelka2 Report

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Guido Pisano
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

helping your wife means that most of the job is on her shoulder. I prefer say that I do my part...

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#45

Reminder

Reminder

tahliaw , brownandbella Report

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J. F.
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm a misanthrope- I actually enjoy to not have to deal with somebody on a daily basis. I must be a quite rare man according to this article

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#46

We Used To Think We Were Always At Fault

We Used To Think We Were Always At Fault

MysteriousLife7 Report

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Zephyr Anthem
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

True if you date a self centered douche who doesn't care about your pleasure...

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#47

Women Protect Women From Harm. Men Protect Other Men's Ability To Lie, Cheat, And Knowingly Harm Women

Women Protect Women From Harm. Men Protect Other Men's Ability To Lie, Cheat, And Knowingly Harm Women

Twohagsover30 Report

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Valisbourne Spiritforge
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't know about any 'bro code'. But any friend of mine cheating on his SO (also probably a friend of mine by association) and expecting me to keep it a secret isn't really my friend.

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#50

*internal Screaming, Forever*

*internal Screaming, Forever*

anonymous , NikkiCallowayy Report

Note: this post originally had 79 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.