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Dating and relationships are difficult even on a good day. And good days are pretty rare. Unfortunately, that is the reality everyone lives in when navigating the romantic world. Especially women. But at least they have a place to vent.

The subreddit r/FemaleDatingStrategy has 175K members (or as it calls them, queens), constantly discussing their love lives, and that includes all the nonsense that arises too. Continue scrolling and check out what they have to say.

#1

Men Only Bringing The Audacity, Yet Again, To The Table!

Men Only Bringing The Audacity, Yet Again, To The Table!

placemat24 Report

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BlackestDawn
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Took me a sec to realize it, but good going. You have to consider yourself first.

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To help you get a better understanding of these posts, Bored Panda got in touch with dating coach, 2 million view TED speaker, and media personality Hayley Quinn. She believes that "dating is different for men and women. However, you'd be wrong to think that one gender has it easy."

"Instead men and women often face equal and opposite problems to one another," Quinn said. "Guys might struggle to think of how to approach a woman, and women (who traditionally and maybe wrongly) have been told they can't make the first move and so panic over where they can find all the guys that want to approach them."

#2

Say It Louder For The People In The Back!!

Say It Louder For The People In The Back!!

Twohagsover30 , ghvstbvr Report

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master_minds9 avatar
denzoren
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've never understood this...if you lose control over what a woman wears then you need some serious help. The problem definitely isn't the clothes.

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In the world of online dating, Quinn also sees noticeable disparities. "Guys may feel like they're having to move heaven and earth to get one lousy response from a woman, whilst women can feel overwhelmed and harassed by unsuitable suitors," she explained. "Men could usually learn from women that they need to have higher standards for the women they interact with, and women could take a leaf out of men's dating and learn how they too can be proactive."

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#4

Some Men Need To Learn This

Some Men Need To Learn This

anonymous , taragroves05 Report

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BingeFest1
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This goes for everybody. Treat others the way you want to be treated

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In 2020, the Pew Research Center surveyed Americans to find out more about their love life. While single-and-looking men and women reported equal levels of dissatisfaction with their dating lives and the ease of finding people to date, women were more likely to say they have had some particularly negative experiences.

Most women who were single and looking to date (65%) said they have experienced at least one of six harassing behaviors asked about in the survey from someone they were dating or had been on a date with, such as being touched in a way that made them uncomfortable or rumors being spread about their sexual history.

#6

Oops

Oops

PBJellyNutella Report

"Though men might think women have guys queuing up to date them (which sounds great right?) in reality women face plenty of dating challenges," Quinn said. "They may feel emotionally drained by dating, as they push through dates where they don't feel a connection. If they're seeking a relationship they may struggle to tell which guy's going to be in for the long haul, and who will disappear at the first inkling of commitment. They may even not know how to get offline and actually meet men in real life; and get stuck in the belief that all the 'good men' have run out, and it's impossible to meet someone."

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The dating coach added that women also face significantly more judgement around things like their age, which can be a challenge on dating apps; and more scrutiny for expressing their sexuality. "So don't think that just because she's got a queue of potential suitors that she's not having a hard time dating."

We all can be douches to one another. Let's not.

#8

That Really Puts It In Perspective

That Really Puts It In Perspective

Descendant_of_Innana Report

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Nadine Bamberger
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And it's always on us, don't dress that way, don't walk there, don't provoke. When it happens we didn't fight enough, fought too hard, didn't say no, didn't mean it when we said it. If we report it we get blamed, re traumatized by questions and rape kits that are then left untouched, called liars.

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#11

100% True For Me

100% True For Me

cinderella_rising , PatrickStrud Report

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Legen ( wait for it ) dary
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I feel a drop off interest on men (thanks a lot) when I say my husband is a police officer or a jujitsu master.

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#14

They Will Always Make “Single Mothers” The Villains To Shift Blame From Male Predators Or Male Parental Child Neglect

They Will Always Make “Single Mothers” The Villains To Shift Blame From Male Predators Or Male Parental Child Neglect

TheOGJammies , blackwomensday Report

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#15

Speaks For Itself

Speaks For Itself

yggiwtmiih Report

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Ana
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm still thinking about the time women had to use hat pins to defend themselves from handsy men. They were covered in fabric from head to tow. It's never about the way you dress, it's about being decent.

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#16

Perfect Way To Deal With Their “Jokes”

Perfect Way To Deal With Their “Jokes”

copingwithsht Report

#17

Be A Hvm In All Aspects Of Life

Be A Hvm In All Aspects Of Life

OhDionne , OhDionne Report

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Rachel Peterson
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I always support the allies, reminding them how much I value them.

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#18

How Many Of You “Developed” Issues While In A Relationship? I’ll Go First: Depression And Anxiety. Cured As Soon As We Broke Up

How Many Of You “Developed” Issues While In A Relationship? I’ll Go First: Depression And Anxiety. Cured As Soon As We Broke Up

anonymous , AmySilverberg Report

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abdk333 avatar
K Witmer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mom was convinced she was just a miserable person. She eloped w my dad when she was 15 he was 19. She was 25 when she got divorced she then realized she was a very outgoing extrovert that loved to smile and be herself

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#19

Keep It Real Out There

Keep It Real Out There

supremelyparanoid , wsteyrrself Report

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scarr_bee
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I remember when I started talking to this random person on the internet. I was 12, almost 13. he was 17. My friend told me he got weird vibes from the 17 year old, so boom I blocked him and now I realize it was the right thing to do. That's hella creepy. And he continued to talk to me even after I told him how old I was.

crisbarriuso avatar
Miss Cris
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm sorry but he continued to talk to you *because* you were 12. And he might be 71 instead of 17.

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Coleen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The idea that kids are "mature for their age" is much more far-reaching than older boys. Families can be equally responsible. I can never forget when Jessica Dubroff (age 7) died in a plane crash while attempting to become the youngest person to fly a plane across the U.S. (It is believed that she was not flying the plane when it crashed in a storm, but that her father consented to take off in a storm to keep her on schedule.) One of her parents mentioned that she was "so mature. She was 7 going on 30." Someone replied in an editorial, "No, she was 7 going on 8 and now she will never see 30" thanks to being allowed to make that attempt.

makaylargardner avatar
BlackPearltheSeaWing/NightWing
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I remember one time some pervert I didn't know texted me asking for "rough [a**l] sex" and I told him exactly what I thought of him asking such a young girl a question and then blocked him.

samkunz_1 avatar
Sam Kunz
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If an 18 year old were talking to my 14 year old niece, me and that man would have a nice long talk while we waited for the ambulance to arrive

kathrynbaylis_1 avatar
Kathryn Baylis
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, they aren’t Romeo and Juliet, and this isn’t the 14th century. He is of age to be an adult so, push come to shove, he could be threatened with arrest and being put on the pedophile registry if he refuses to leave the little girl alone. One would hope, if in that situation, it wouldn’t come to that. Thing is, even though ten years later the age difference won’t matter a damn, right now it very much does, as the difference is more than just numbers, it’s a matter of physical, mental, and emotional maturity. Even the 18 year old isn’t that much more mature, regardless of the legal designation as an adult.

lynmoffett avatar
Lyn Moffett
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He's a creep and he's trying to take advantage. Block him and concentrate on your life. Internet is a killer

hjdashiell avatar
crisbarriuso avatar
Miss Cris
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He's a pervert and he commited a crime. He must be for years in prision. If he needs to "maturate", he'll have the time there.

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rjohnson0302 avatar
TrashPandaSociety
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If I see 1 mother f*****g 17 year old or older male speaking to my underage daughter, you won't have to wonder why I just got a life sentence on a murder 1 charge.

robertthompson_1 avatar
Robert Thompson
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yep. He sees someone who doesn't have the skills to recognize him for who he is. You just see his charm and think that it is real.

mrsamyday avatar
Yagi-chan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Once had a sister who was the predator. She was almost 18, senior in high school. She was completely obsessed with a 14 year old boy at our church who just entered high school. She had sexually abused me as a child and then she sexually abused him. Oddly, when he broke off the relationship a few years later, she couldn’t let it go and obsessively stalked him until he was finally married to someone else years later. As an adult in my late 30’s now, I see her as an abuser and pedophile but her behavior was ignored at the time.

shoname7 avatar
Free Ride
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

yep been there done that... worst mistake to download discord and believe middle aged men saying they are my age... :(

justionartis avatar
Jamie artis
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

god this reminds me so a couple weeks ago one of my friends basically snuck a 19 year old man into her house at 3 in the morning so her 14 year old best friend could hangout with him., so i told her hes a definite pedo and she should make him leave but then she started getting mad at me and tried to defend the friend and even grosser the man. whats even worse is shes a victim of sexual assualt herself. its just sad.

nickyoldfielddesciple avatar
IlovemydogShilo
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Most of the time boys of that age just want one thing. Sex. That' it. If you think your mature enough at 14 to let him have his way, you're not. If you give him what he wants, he will immediately loose interest in you, brag to his mates about his latest conquest and they will start treating you like the town s**t. Plus you could end up pregnant and there is no chance he will want to do his part in raising the child if you choose to keep the baby. Walk away and keep away. They are so not worth it.

peppershakerpros avatar
PeppershakerPros
Community Member
4 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

and those lil girls go on to make OCs and describe them as being "mature for their age" without knowing it means "i'm gonna gaslight you into thinking you're older than you are so you feel less shameful about making csam of yourself and sending it to me"

kevin-braid avatar
ADHD
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

and report the scummy bastard to the police and plaster his PMs all over social media so others can see he is a predator scumbag who really deserves a good wood chippering.

dasoundplug avatar
Tommy Edison
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

lol @ people telling other people what to do... and claiming every person in that situation is "preying on you" lmao you people are f****n nuts

tabbynewton avatar
tabby newton
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

gonna just put this here https://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/real-life/news-life/mary-kay-letourneau-who-had-affair-with-underage-student-has-died/news-story/7db44d921532b773554a0ea8f8831c0a

meliajanssen_1 avatar
Melia Janssen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The problem is talking to teenagers is like talking to a wall. They're not likely to listen to you regardless of how well intended you are or how nicely you talk to them. There has to be some psychological mind trick to get teenagers to listen to you when you really are trying to advise them for their own good.

queeronabike avatar
Andy Acceber
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Teenagers probably won't give you validation, but they hear you. Keep saying what needs to be said. More importantly, also make space to listen to them. Like anyone, they're more likely to listen to you if you listen to them.

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Oblivian Royale
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Its not always true some young girls take advantage of young men because they want sugar daddies who can buy them stuff

oblivianroyale avatar
Oblivian Royale
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And when they dont get it they have a fit and ruin that man's life it happened to my brother

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Russian Otaku
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Pretty sexist to say that on all males just talking. Can also be school friends, small town friends where there ain't much young people and so on and so on

autumnwalton avatar
Autumn
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I agree. Not saying you should go somewhere alone with them or try to date but I can understand having a few older friends.

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Amy Dodds
Community Member
2 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Yeah equally I was 15 I met a guy who was in the support band at a gig. He was 22, I said I was 17 (uk) but then admitted the truth. We dated for a few months. I knew exactly what I was doing and was already sexually active.

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May
Community Member
2 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

When my sister was 16, she fell for this guy that was 21. He was in a relationship, but she didn't care - she pursued him, got him, and married him 5 years later. She was then (and is still) more mature than my BIL. Young girls are not automatically helpless victims - a lot of us knew our own mind early, and a lot of boys mature really late. None of the older boys we hung out with, when I was a teen, ever preyed on me or any of my friends - you can't generalize like this.

abdk333 avatar
K Witmer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Boys do not mature later in life that's a made up thing. Stop excusing bad behavior.

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#20

Hvm Right There. Take Note Scrotes

Hvm Right There. Take Note Scrotes

Big-Paleontologist13 Report

#22

Nothing But Truth

Nothing But Truth

ScarletFate779 Report

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Dennis Troelsen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

i'm just going to assume that most here are Americans, being from denmark myself i have been to parties (in denmark) sitting or standing next to a few women and they end up talking sex good and bad experiances partners and so on and never have i thought anything shaming about them but good for them that they have been curious and learned a few things like one i remember very clearly when trying a**l ALWAYS remember lube and lots of it and take time, most of this shaming comes from bad parenting and trying to be the cool/alpha male, bad boy, and for my part korrect if some guy i knew started to brag about rape i would not shame him he would (maybe) wake up in the hospital at some point.

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#26

This Almost Makes Me Want To Redownload Dating Apps To Do The Same!

This Almost Makes Me Want To Redownload Dating Apps To Do The Same!

jfk31989 Report

#27

Even A 35 Yo Man Has These Same Meltdowns But They're The Logical Sex!!!

Even A 35 Yo Man Has These Same Meltdowns But They're The Logical Sex!!!

_xyoungbellax_ , iamaroadtrip Report

#28

Watch The Way Men Treat Women They're Not Attracted To

Watch The Way Men Treat Women They're Not Attracted To

Lucifers_Treasurer Report

#29

The Message

The Message

Brown_chick45 Report

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Mazer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Choose to empower your kids by considering them now and in the future. Spot on

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#30

Mom Praising Son-In-Law For The Bare Minimum

Mom Praising Son-In-Law For The Bare Minimum

sassyheather Report

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ZooMom
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband stayed with our kids as infants while I worked. Everyone went on and on about how amazing he was (and he was) but then we switched roles this past year and I hear how “lucky I am to GET to stay home” and how bad they feel he works long hours. B****! I pumped breast milk on the floor of a unisex bathroom while still taking phone calls.

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#31

Why Are Males?

Why Are Males?

MarbleWorld , EazyBreezyJay Report

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Caro Caro
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would call him out, get management and then call the cops! Effing dirty slob.

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#32

Leave Him In The Dust

Leave Him In The Dust

cinderella_rising , efowlz Report

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El muerto
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

some time it bothers me, some women think they don't have a choice because they are in love.

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#33

This Is Why We Can’t Even Trust The “Good” Guys

This Is Why We Can’t Even Trust The “Good” Guys

elementalvirago , sarahradz_ Report

#34

Keep Your Friends Safe!

Keep Your Friends Safe!

reddit.com , AthenaBozios Report

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#35

Used Or New, We Will Run You Over

Used Or New, We Will Run You Over

reddit.com Report

#36

Thoughts?

Thoughts?

liondale , BIndlovukazi Report

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BingeFest1
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If I ever actually find somebody I'd want to marry I would never propose with anybody around. I would want to eliminate any peer pressure and create an intimate environment

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#37

Instead Of Holding Rapists/Harassers Accountable, He Mocks Women For Trying To Protect Themselves. A True Pos

Instead Of Holding Rapists/Harassers Accountable, He Mocks Women For Trying To Protect Themselves. A True Pos

reddit.com Report

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Xottel
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's not about locating the witness. It's about scaring the bad guy by becoming a potential witness. Some women even resort to making fake calls on their way home. I'd say it stops at least some horrible people so that's an improvement.

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#38

Henry Viii's Wives If They'd Never Met Him

Henry Viii's Wives If They'd Never Met Him

Zayelle Report

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Ana
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I still think Anne of Cleves got the best deal. She didn't have to remain married to Henry VIII and even got a sweet castle and money to boot and she never ever had to get married again.

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#39

Thought This Belongs Here. (From Selfawarewolves... Men Are So Close, I Can't Decide If They're Ignorant On Purpose Or Genuinely Can't Grasp Basic Concepts)

Thought This Belongs Here. (From Selfawarewolves... Men Are So Close, I Can't Decide If They're Ignorant On Purpose Or Genuinely Can't Grasp Basic Concepts)

therebellioustiger Report

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Lauren Caswell
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sounds like the guy who yells "hey pretty lady" and approaches a woman they don't know, and when she "walks fast" to get away or tells him to stop, she has a "bad attitude"

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#40

Being In You 20’s Should Be About Self Development, Your Eduction And To Lay The Foundation For Financial Independence

Being In You 20’s Should Be About Self Development, Your Eduction And To Lay The Foundation For Financial Independence

Shefthegooddog , iamsedem_ Report

#41

Most Stay-At-Moms Do Not Get The Luxury Of Building A Career, Or Even The Luxury Of A Personal Life This Is How Women End Up In A Financial Trap With No Support

Most Stay-At-Moms Do Not Get The Luxury Of Building A Career, Or Even The Luxury Of A Personal Life This Is How Women End Up In A Financial Trap With No Support

Journalist_Full , BridgieCasey Report

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fire bug
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ummmm... my wife and I support our family. I work long hours. My wife takes care of 90% of the household stuff. I clean the kitchen every night and get home by dinner time every night to have family time with her and our kids. I don't support her and she doesn't support me. We support each other.

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#43

Tea

Tea

Descendant_of_Innana , skatingstoned Report

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QueenMiri
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Women who could tell stories about crazy ex boyfriends rarely make it out alive. That's why you only hear about crazy ex girlfriends.

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#44

Seriously

Seriously

normabelka2 Report

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Guido Pisano
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

helping your wife means that most of the job is on her shoulder. I prefer say that I do my part...

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#45

Reminder

Reminder

tahliaw , brownandbella Report

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J. F.
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm a misanthrope- I actually enjoy to not have to deal with somebody on a daily basis. I must be a quite rare man according to this article

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#46

We Used To Think We Were Always At Fault

We Used To Think We Were Always At Fault

MysteriousLife7 Report

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Zephyr Anthem
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

True if you date a self centered douche who doesn't care about your pleasure...

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#47

Women Protect Women From Harm. Men Protect Other Men's Ability To Lie, Cheat, And Knowingly Harm Women

Women Protect Women From Harm. Men Protect Other Men's Ability To Lie, Cheat, And Knowingly Harm Women

Twohagsover30 Report

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Valisbourne Spiritforge
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't know about any 'bro code'. But any friend of mine cheating on his SO (also probably a friend of mine by association) and expecting me to keep it a secret isn't really my friend.

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#50

*internal Screaming, Forever*

*internal Screaming, Forever*

anonymous , NikkiCallowayy Report

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