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50 Times Women Were Put Into Awkward Situations By Men And Called Them Out Online
Dating and relationships are difficult even on a good day. And good days are pretty rare. Unfortunately, that is the reality everyone lives in when navigating the romantic world. Especially women. But at least they have a place to vent.
The subreddit r/FemaleDatingStrategy has 175K members (or as it calls them, queens), constantly discussing their love lives, and that includes all the nonsense that arises too. Continue scrolling and check out what they have to say.
This post may include affiliate links.
Men Only Bringing The Audacity, Yet Again, To The Table!
Took me a sec to realize it, but good going. You have to consider yourself first.
To help you get a better understanding of these posts, Bored Panda got in touch with dating coach, 2 million view TED speaker, and media personality Hayley Quinn. She believes that "dating is different for men and women. However, you'd be wrong to think that one gender has it easy."
"Instead men and women often face equal and opposite problems to one another," Quinn said. "Guys might struggle to think of how to approach a woman, and women (who traditionally and maybe wrongly) have been told they can't make the first move and so panic over where they can find all the guys that want to approach them."
Say It Louder For The People In The Back!!
Poetic Justice
In the world of online dating, Quinn also sees noticeable disparities. "Guys may feel like they're having to move heaven and earth to get one lousy response from a woman, whilst women can feel overwhelmed and harassed by unsuitable suitors," she explained. "Men could usually learn from women that they need to have higher standards for the women they interact with, and women could take a leaf out of men's dating and learn how they too can be proactive."
Some Men Need To Learn This
This goes for everybody. Treat others the way you want to be treated
“Nudes?” He Asked Hopefully
In 2020, the Pew Research Center surveyed Americans to find out more about their love life. While single-and-looking men and women reported equal levels of dissatisfaction with their dating lives and the ease of finding people to date, women were more likely to say they have had some particularly negative experiences.
Most women who were single and looking to date (65%) said they have experienced at least one of six harassing behaviors asked about in the survey from someone they were dating or had been on a date with, such as being touched in a way that made them uncomfortable or rumors being spread about their sexual history.
Oops
When you made an effort and treated her well and when you just stopped.
Stop Normalizing Men’s Immaturity
"Though men might think women have guys queuing up to date them (which sounds great right?) in reality women face plenty of dating challenges," Quinn said. "They may feel emotionally drained by dating, as they push through dates where they don't feel a connection. If they're seeking a relationship they may struggle to tell which guy's going to be in for the long haul, and who will disappear at the first inkling of commitment. They may even not know how to get offline and actually meet men in real life; and get stuck in the belief that all the 'good men' have run out, and it's impossible to meet someone."
The dating coach added that women also face significantly more judgement around things like their age, which can be a challenge on dating apps; and more scrutiny for expressing their sexuality. "So don't think that just because she's got a queue of potential suitors that she's not having a hard time dating."
We all can be douches to one another. Let's not.
That Really Puts It In Perspective
And it's always on us, don't dress that way, don't walk there, don't provoke. When it happens we didn't fight enough, fought too hard, didn't say no, didn't mean it when we said it. If we report it we get blamed, re traumatized by questions and rape kits that are then left untouched, called liars.
Lol
Agree entirely and this is one of the reasons I hate Disney movies
Shrug
100% True For Me
I feel a drop off interest on men (thanks a lot) when I say my husband is a police officer or a jujitsu master.
A Queen Grandmama
Cracks Me Up Every Time
They Will Always Make “Single Mothers” The Villains To Shift Blame From Male Predators Or Male Parental Child Neglect
Speaks For Itself
Perfect Way To Deal With Their “Jokes”
Be A Hvm In All Aspects Of Life
I always support the allies, reminding them how much I value them.
How Many Of You “Developed” Issues While In A Relationship? I’ll Go First: Depression And Anxiety. Cured As Soon As We Broke Up
Hvm Right There. Take Note Scrotes
Nothing But Truth
i'm just going to assume that most here are Americans, being from denmark myself i have been to parties (in denmark) sitting or standing next to a few women and they end up talking sex good and bad experiances partners and so on and never have i thought anything shaming about them but good for them that they have been curious and learned a few things like one i remember very clearly when trying a**l ALWAYS remember lube and lots of it and take time, most of this shaming comes from bad parenting and trying to be the cool/alpha male, bad boy, and for my part korrect if some guy i knew started to brag about rape i would not shame him he would (maybe) wake up in the hospital at some point.
Where Is The Lie?
Being Decent Isn’t Difficult
Geee I Wonder Why
This Almost Makes Me Want To Redownload Dating Apps To Do The Same!
Even A 35 Yo Man Has These Same Meltdowns But They're The Logical Sex!!!
Watch The Way Men Treat Women They're Not Attracted To
The Message
Mom Praising Son-In-Law For The Bare Minimum
My husband stayed with our kids as infants while I worked. Everyone went on and on about how amazing he was (and he was) but then we switched roles this past year and I hear how “lucky I am to GET to stay home” and how bad they feel he works long hours. B****! I pumped breast milk on the floor of a unisex bathroom while still taking phone calls.
Why Are Males?
Leave Him In The Dust
This Is Why We Can’t Even Trust The “Good” Guys
Keep Your Friends Safe!
Used Or New, We Will Run You Over
Please tell me he is a virgin too. Ask for what you can also offer.
Thoughts?
If I ever actually find somebody I'd want to marry I would never propose with anybody around. I would want to eliminate any peer pressure and create an intimate environment
And more importantly : it would be already decided by both of you. Put a ring, no matter where, would be just a formality, not the all matter, a surprise.
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Don't embarrass someone's daughter in public by putting her in an impossible situation. FIFY
Yeah, how is that not an embarrassing situation for the woman? Does the OP think she likes having to decline a proposal in front of so many people?
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My now husband and I decided to get married while sat on the sofa, watching tv. "Shall we? Yeah." Very romantic! But we've been together 21 years so..
We'd been talking about it for a month before my husband "popped the question" in the car in the driveway of my parents' house. We've been together 50 years this coming fall, so...
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In that particular case sh had broken up with him way before and he kept following her.
It's the height of stupidity to propose in apublic setting with an audience unless you are extremely sure your partner will say yes. But even then not advisable.
I proposed to my wife in the middle of the night in a national park. No one around, no lights, just the two of us. It was intimate and no pressure, just wanted to know her honest answer. (we're celebrating 25 years this year! :)
But, gosh. Surely the middle of a mall surrounded by random strangers would've been more romantic. j/k
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The first time you discuss marriage should not be the proposal. I'm always confused when people are surprised by a proposal. You don't talk much in your relationship?
I think proposing should be a totally private thing. That will not only give the proposed person the opportunity to refuse if they don't feel like getting married to you, but it will also give you a chance to not be embarassed if they do refuse you publicly. Maybe your fiance loves you and wants to stay with you forever, just doesn't want to get married, so getting proposed to in public will just ruin your relationship.
I don't like the idea of public, extravagant proposals. I don't like calling attention to myself.
The surprise should be the private discussion of marriage between the two partners. You do not just jump into such a responsibility!
So stupid. No background of the relationship, dude could be a complete asshole. Either way good for her for being honest, which is way harder to do.
The whole proposal thing is an outdated crock of rubbish anyway. It is the single most important decision you will make. Why would you spring it on someone as a surprise and expect an immediate answer?? Why would your dream of all dreams be that you'd be shoved into that situation out of the blue?? Discuss it properly, like you would any other deeply serious decision. Believe me, the moment you and a .n. other decide that you do want to get married is just as exciting and lovely and swoony and dizzying because ultimately it's the same thing, just done as equals.
He shouldnt have done that in the first place, a public proposal-so obnoxious- and since he did he knew he had a 50/50 chance so he had to have prepped for it. (Most likely didnt, that is on him)
ANd she had time to leave the scene when she saw the crowd gather. What did she think they were staying there for?! He shouldn't have done it. She shouldn't have let it get to that point. Bit of a drama queen, she is
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If a man grabs your boobs or tries to kiss you in public let him and then gently chide him later, don’t embarrass someone’s son in public . Matter settled
Bullshit. Don't embarrass someone's son?!?! F**k that, the man depicted in the photo as being rejected was actually lucky she knew what she wanted, as he sure as hell didn't know she wouldn't appreciate the crowd, or wasn't ready to marry him. At least one of then was thinking.
Even better, have a discussion on whether the two of you WANT to get married. Why on Earth would you ask such a question unless you already knew the answer?
Because she is a drama queen and he thought he would like the drama of a public proposal.
Load More Replies... My ex proposed to me infront of my family, on christmas, and I didnt wanna embarrass him so I said yes. My family didnt know back then that he was abusive towards me or how much he broke me down daily, when I finally realized what was going on in our relationship I left a note, the ring and the key and bolted while he was asleep. I felt really bad about that for years, thought I owed him a "real" goodbye but now when I'm older and finally built myself up again I realize that I didnt owe him anything at all.
It’s a private matter between two people. It should remain private until it’s certain. Then the two—-TWO—-of you can tell the whole world.
She had plenty of time to leave the scene. Just what exactly did she think was going of with the crowd of people there staring at them? Either she's a drama queen or she's mighty stupid.
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I commented on a similar post. My ex wanted me to marry and sponsor him. I was so against it. He told me that he was gonna propose in a restaurant. He would've been embarrassed because I would left him down there looking ridiculous. Especially because his sole purpose for a public proposal would be to ensure that I said yes
A marriage proposal is a personal and intimate moment. Why do people (especially men) seem to want an audience? DO they want a crowd when they have sex too?
My husband and I got engaged in New Orleans. He didn't get down on a knee to propose, but instead we talked and decided it was a good time to tell people that we are engaged because it was something we had discussed prior at home and decided it was ok now. No embarrassment and no fuss.
Every time I see this type of situation I just cringe. This is a personal, serious moment. If you have to make a production out of it for attention and validation you deserve to be told NO.
This really isn't necessarily fair. We don't know that he was trying to coerce her or be manipulative, she may have a good reason to refuse or she could just be a real a-hole. We have no way of knowing. I see a lot of jumping to conclusions here.
How could someone want to marry a person that they needed to manipulate or coerce into being with them anyway? Wait, a narcissist, I think they are able to trick themselves into believing their own bullshit.
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It's exactly the reason I would never do it publicly. I wouldn't want my possible partner to feel coerced to say yes just to not be called a "bitch". I think it could be very stressful for a woman and not necessarily "romantic".
Don't propose in public! It should be a private matter between two people.
Don't publicly embarrass a person in public with an offer of contractual servitude then not take a public 'no' for an answer. If he can't take no as a legitimate response in public, what is this arrogant show off gonna do in private when he hears 'no'?
I never understood making a profound personal moment so public. I get maybe doing so around family and close friends MAYBE but just a straight up public affair, like the one pictured or at a sporting event? Not every proposal needs to be romantic but what is romantic about proposing around a good number of strangers?
I popped the question at our home in the kitchen. I didn’t want to embarrass my future wife in public.
Me and my husband just talked about marriage one day and decided to get married that day at the courthouse just the two of us, never have regretted it once
The "matter settled" part of the comment is very irrkitating.
So, he didn't know her well enough to sense that she wasn't into marrying him. Funny idea of marriage, in my opinion.
But he did know she is an attention-seeking drama queen so he made the proposal public.
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Interesting, the apparent genders of the people delivering these messages.
I made it very clear to my (now) husband when we first started considering whether we actually wanted to marry each other that I would say no if he did a public question (he wanted to ask - I wasn’t demanding he be the “man” and take the lead). As much as I love him, I find the whole ask in front of a crowd thing to be the height of embarrassing. I get that some people love that sort of thing, but I think it’s better to do it in a meaningful way than a public way.
this is f****n pathetic... talk about extreme.... nobody is coercing anyone to marry them... some of you bitches need f****n help
Me and my wife had talked thru marriage in depth before we "proposed" and made it official.
As I read somewhere, talk about it and get engaged somewhere private, then do a proposal in any way/place you want. That way the marrying part isn’t a surprise, but the proposal still is. No embarrassing moment to say no in public :)
My bf and I talked about that and we both agreed that it's an embarassing situation that put a lot of pressure on you. Even if i really want to marry him i'd most certainly panick and say no
Instead Of Holding Rapists/Harassers Accountable, He Mocks Women For Trying To Protect Themselves. A True Pos
Henry Viii's Wives If They'd Never Met Him
Thought This Belongs Here. (From Selfawarewolves... Men Are So Close, I Can't Decide If They're Ignorant On Purpose Or Genuinely Can't Grasp Basic Concepts)
Sounds like the guy who yells "hey pretty lady" and approaches a woman they don't know, and when she "walks fast" to get away or tells him to stop, she has a "bad attitude"
Being In You 20’s Should Be About Self Development, Your Eduction And To Lay The Foundation For Financial Independence
Most Stay-At-Moms Do Not Get The Luxury Of Building A Career, Or Even The Luxury Of A Personal Life This Is How Women End Up In A Financial Trap With No Support
Ummmm... my wife and I support our family. I work long hours. My wife takes care of 90% of the household stuff. I clean the kitchen every night and get home by dinner time every night to have family time with her and our kids. I don't support her and she doesn't support me. We support each other.
Say It Louder For These Predatory Men!
Seriously
helping your wife means that most of the job is on her shoulder. I prefer say that I do my part...
Reminder
We Used To Think We Were Always At Fault
True if you date a self centered douche who doesn't care about your pleasure...
Women Protect Women From Harm. Men Protect Other Men's Ability To Lie, Cheat, And Knowingly Harm Women
I don't know about any 'bro code'. But any friend of mine cheating on his SO (also probably a friend of mine by association) and expecting me to keep it a secret isn't really my friend.
Never Settle For Less Than You Deserve
It Never Ends
*internal Screaming, Forever*
Note: this post originally had 79 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.
If you read an article like this and think "but it isn't all men, I'm not like that" don't blame women, blame the 40% of men who are ruining it for everyone else, male and female. Also realize that your hurt feelings are nothing compared to a lifetime of fear and being treated as an inferior person or disposable object.
And f*****g SPEAK UP when your male buddies are talking and acting like assholes, douches, perverts, creeps, and potential rapists, and call them out for it. Publicly. Make it socially unacceptable. If they get called out and publicly shamed for it——every single time they try it—-maybe they’ll think twice about doing it again. If they don’t stop, then just drop them as a friend, and go find better quality people to hang out with.
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For the record here, r/FemaleDatingStategy is not a very, uh, liked subereddit because oftentimes there is a lot of things said about men like "who cares if men have mental health problems" and such. I agree with all these screenshots, but the subreddit that the came off of isn't the best. There are a lot of entitled people on there, which is sad because the sub could have been a really positive and supportive place.
I spent all of 5 minutes in that subreddit and saw so much sexist and misandrist crap, I never went back. That sub is utter trash.
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Talking on your phone /texting and wearing earbuds while walking alone is not safe.
They’re often not playing music with those earphones in, and never not keeping their ears and eyes open to their surroundings while on the phone.
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I made a profile on something like tinder. Oh the things I have seen 😅... I said on my profile that I'm bi. This man started with do you f*ck my ex? Well, first who the heck is you're ex and why are you bothering me with this. And that I was probably not because I wouldn't fall for the types of girls that falls for him. He said my attitude is the same as his ex and blocked me 🤣 well, I wonder why girls have an attitude with you 🤔
Oh dear XD. I'm bi too! But that dude was a jerk. (I think I'll just stay away from dating apps).
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If you ask my daughter the way to a man's heart, she'll say "between the 4th and 5th ribs". She'll also tell you what we say to death is "not today"
I hate the fact that men are learning this! All men should know the way women feel! And they should listen to women!
I don't know about you guys, but I'm getting pretty sick of all generalizations and 1-dimensional views about 'men' and 'women'.
If the data backs it up, is it really a generalization? No. No, not really.
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For 17 years I tried my best to set a good example for my daughter on how someone treats someone they love. Her choice for a boyfriend helps me feel that I did a good job.
Imagine that all the time for decades starting from when You're about 11 or 12 and not just from one man but from many - from any. And that would still be a much better than average experience, because like you say, your guy never actually did anything.
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97% of women have been sexually assaulted. It's not "a few affected". It's the majority of women. I'm lucky it isn't me, and I genuinely fear that it will be one day. Ignoring people and being aggressive is how people save their life, perhaps they are happily married and kind, but perhaps this is the day I become the new Sarah Everard. I'm not willing to play russian roulette with 5 bullets in the gun. Men do not get assaulted nearly as much, and it's usually other men that do it. This is not an equal issue. Men's issues exist and should be talked about, but not in order to silence women's. Just as we have BLM, stop asian hate, climate change strikes, me too, and many others, we can talk about men's issues in a way that doesn't damage women's.
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Bored Panda is not a writer, it's a website where everyone can contribute. Nobody is stopping you from writing that post about women assaulting men in kilts. But you don't get to tell other contributors what they should find important to write about.
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But it's not even attacking men, that's what baffles me about this comment section. How is asking a short, ugly man if he has ever asked out a short, ugly woman attacking all men?! You only feel attacked if you have done something from this list, and you only need feel attacked if you haven't learned better and still do this stuff.
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Literally no one is saying we are. All we want is respect, to feel safe, to not be used repeatedly, and not have our lives threatened for telling a man "no".
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As another Gen Xer, I have to disagree. I was harassed both in public and at work. I was groomed by a 29 year old man when I was 16. This has very little to do with what generation you were born into. My guess is you were just lucky.
Load More Replies... Because it's an issue that makes many, many women miserable. It needs to be talked about.
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If you read an article like this and think "but it isn't all men, I'm not like that" don't blame women, blame the 40% of men who are ruining it for everyone else, male and female. Also realize that your hurt feelings are nothing compared to a lifetime of fear and being treated as an inferior person or disposable object.
And f*****g SPEAK UP when your male buddies are talking and acting like assholes, douches, perverts, creeps, and potential rapists, and call them out for it. Publicly. Make it socially unacceptable. If they get called out and publicly shamed for it——every single time they try it—-maybe they’ll think twice about doing it again. If they don’t stop, then just drop them as a friend, and go find better quality people to hang out with.
Load More Replies... For the record here, r/FemaleDatingStategy is not a very, uh, liked subereddit because oftentimes there is a lot of things said about men like "who cares if men have mental health problems" and such. I agree with all these screenshots, but the subreddit that the came off of isn't the best. There are a lot of entitled people on there, which is sad because the sub could have been a really positive and supportive place.
I spent all of 5 minutes in that subreddit and saw so much sexist and misandrist crap, I never went back. That sub is utter trash.
Load More Replies... Talking on your phone /texting and wearing earbuds while walking alone is not safe.
They’re often not playing music with those earphones in, and never not keeping their ears and eyes open to their surroundings while on the phone.
Load More Replies... I made a profile on something like tinder. Oh the things I have seen 😅... I said on my profile that I'm bi. This man started with do you f*ck my ex? Well, first who the heck is you're ex and why are you bothering me with this. And that I was probably not because I wouldn't fall for the types of girls that falls for him. He said my attitude is the same as his ex and blocked me 🤣 well, I wonder why girls have an attitude with you 🤔
Oh dear XD. I'm bi too! But that dude was a jerk. (I think I'll just stay away from dating apps).
Load More Replies... If you ask my daughter the way to a man's heart, she'll say "between the 4th and 5th ribs". She'll also tell you what we say to death is "not today"
I hate the fact that men are learning this! All men should know the way women feel! And they should listen to women!
I don't know about you guys, but I'm getting pretty sick of all generalizations and 1-dimensional views about 'men' and 'women'.
If the data backs it up, is it really a generalization? No. No, not really.
Load More Replies... For 17 years I tried my best to set a good example for my daughter on how someone treats someone they love. Her choice for a boyfriend helps me feel that I did a good job.
Imagine that all the time for decades starting from when You're about 11 or 12 and not just from one man but from many - from any. And that would still be a much better than average experience, because like you say, your guy never actually did anything.
Load More Replies... 97% of women have been sexually assaulted. It's not "a few affected". It's the majority of women. I'm lucky it isn't me, and I genuinely fear that it will be one day. Ignoring people and being aggressive is how people save their life, perhaps they are happily married and kind, but perhaps this is the day I become the new Sarah Everard. I'm not willing to play russian roulette with 5 bullets in the gun. Men do not get assaulted nearly as much, and it's usually other men that do it. This is not an equal issue. Men's issues exist and should be talked about, but not in order to silence women's. Just as we have BLM, stop asian hate, climate change strikes, me too, and many others, we can talk about men's issues in a way that doesn't damage women's.
Load More Replies... Bored Panda is not a writer, it's a website where everyone can contribute. Nobody is stopping you from writing that post about women assaulting men in kilts. But you don't get to tell other contributors what they should find important to write about.
Load More Replies... But it's not even attacking men, that's what baffles me about this comment section. How is asking a short, ugly man if he has ever asked out a short, ugly woman attacking all men?! You only feel attacked if you have done something from this list, and you only need feel attacked if you haven't learned better and still do this stuff.
Load More Replies... Literally no one is saying we are. All we want is respect, to feel safe, to not be used repeatedly, and not have our lives threatened for telling a man "no".
Load More Replies... As another Gen Xer, I have to disagree. I was harassed both in public and at work. I was groomed by a 29 year old man when I was 16. This has very little to do with what generation you were born into. My guess is you were just lucky.
Load More Replies... Because it's an issue that makes many, many women miserable. It needs to be talked about.
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