Woman Demands Guests Bring Expensive Gifts To Baby Shower, Student Refuses Because It’s Expensive, Sparks Family Drama
When you have an important occasion combined with entitled family members, it’s a drama not unlike a soap opera waiting to happen. Though usually the room temp soars during wedding planning, birthdays and baby showers can also put a lot of pressure on guests.
Especially if there’s also a generous gift registration list involved, and you can’t really afford getting them. Such a story comes from this 26-year-old university student woman who was invited to her cousin’s second baby shower.
The author who shared the incident on r/AITA said that she was planning on making a handmade blanket for the child, since it’s “a nice personalized gift that you can’t get anywhere else.”But the cousin, Beth, was less than impressed with the idea.
In fact, Beth went as far as telling her “it was homemade [and] it looked ‘tacky’ and it made her look cheap for not having a tag attached to it.” Let’s read the full story right below and let us know what you think of it in the comment section!
A 26-year-old student has recently shared a story of how her cousin demanded all the expensive gifts she couldn’t afford for her second baby’s shower
Image credits: Vidal Balielo Jr. (not the actual photo)
The author of the post later shared this update on the story
Image credits: Careless_Diamond_930
And this is what people had to comment on the whole story
My aunt made my son a beautiful blanket when I was expecting him. It is my most prized possession in my son's mementos. This ungrateful woman is materialistic and greedy.
Agreed I still have a blanket from my grandmother and love it
Load More Replies...I was always told baby showers are only for the first baby. She is just plain greedy.
I was told the same, but I have heard of "baby sprinkles" now, which is generally meant to provide only disposable, needed items (wipes, diapers, I would imagine even nipple cream) that obviously you couldn't reuse from the first baby and would generally be much cheaper on the guests. I don't really have a problem with that, but demanding brand new supplies is bordering on tacky; requiring a set price is definitely well into tacky. I had my first baby shower and made sure that there were cheap things (under $10) as well as the aspirational gifts in case anyone was feeling very generous.
Load More Replies...Depriving her child from needed supplies...: if you can't buy the needed supplies for your own child. Just don't get kids... it's not someone else's responsibility to buy necessary baby stuff
My favorite gift for my first baby was a hand knit blanket, made by a volunteer grandma, for babies in the NICU. It covered his incubator the whole time he was in hospital, then it covered his tiny body at home and now it covers his 15 year old, almost six foot frame while he watches tv, does homework, plays Xbox, etc. It has loose yarn that I've had to knot to keep it from unraveling and I fear for it each time I wash this precious piece of my boy's history. NEVER underestimate something made by hand and with love.
Jesus Christ, I am too old for this type of s***. Is this the Family of 2021? Greedy, ungrateful, entitled a**holes? If you've never been close to a member of your family, there is a reason why. Leave it that way.
She's tacky for having a second baby shower and in control of it. I can't with these people.
I’m currently pregnant with my first child and I purposely made my registry with expensive and cheap gifts because I understand not everyone can afford the more expensive ones. I also have a few people who are making me gifts and I’m completely fine with that. I also am okay with people buying gently used items to save money because I’m not that bougie or sentimental. I really don’t understand moms like this
Are you serious?! Her cousin is a spoiled brat! Both she and her husband work in very good and high-paying jobs. Not only that, but she had a first son only 2 years ago, so his old supplies should still be perfectly usable! And they're both sons, so it's not like she'd be using masculine things for a little girl or vice versa. And yet, she has the audacity to not just ask for more (and EXPENSIVE) baby supplies, but also some things for herself too, like pajamas. And the OP said she has a habit of throwing stuff that she dislikes out, even if it's brand new and unused? Talk about waste! On top of all this, why would an unborn child need such expensive things that he'll grow out of in a short while? What's the problem with having a homemade blanket (a lot of people, including me, like those better than store-bought ones)? Why must she host two baby showers with a required gift instead of buying a few things herself? It's definitely like she's poor. Sorry, I know I'm ranting,
--but this just tends to enrage me. Thanks for reading xd
Load More Replies...I was always told baby showers were only for the first baby. And homemade gifts can be great! I made a blanket for my baby cousin when she turned 1 and I thought it looked amazing. And so did the rest of my family.
NTA. Firstly.... baby showers for second babies are greedy and tacky. They are only intended for first children. Secondly....Gift registries for any event that do not include generic cheap options catering for any budget are also greedy and tacky. Third.. who gives a flying fluke if you are 'depriving her baby of needed supplies'. SHE is the mother. Supplies are HER responsibility. If she cant afford them SHE shouldnt have another child. Finally, Making a blanket is a kind and generous offer and refusing such a gift is greedy and tacky. Anyone with any class would have kindly and gracefully accepted the gift.
As far as etiquette goes.. are you even supposed to have a shower for any following babies? I thought that was only for the first?
Some folks have one for a second, if there's a big age gap ---- the second child being utterly unplanned, five-ten years later than first, so there's actually a *reason* the family might have passed along baby stuff to someone else in the interim. (My mom, for example, didn't plan to have me, and I came along five years later, by which point, my sister was well pass playpens, etc., and so there was no need for her to keep it all, when her other family could use most of it.) I've never known anyone to have a shower for every single child, but maybe my family is weird.
Load More Replies...A baby shower for the SECOND child? Beth can f**k off. If you can't afford to buy your baby things, close your legs.
Hosting your own baby shower is incredibly tacky. A baby shower for the 2nd baby when the first baby is still a toddler is also a no no. The mother to be already has all the supplies she needs. A 2nd shower is just extortion. Of course the 2nd baby deserves gifts and love, but not in shower form.
What's with these people demanding gifts costing X dollars? It sounds like this woman is a re-gifter. She has no respect for the time it takes to make a handmade item, nor does she care that her cousin may have a strict budget.
Some people have an utterly ridiculous view of gifts. You want to celebrate your child, you invite people with who you want to share this moment, and they bring presents as a gesture of goodwill(something that they see fit and can afford). Of course, you can suggest or hint at what you'd like to get, but you don't get to complain if they chose something else. You are not placing an order on Amazon, your guests are under no obligation to buy what you ordered them to.
OMG NTA I went to a babyshower last week, for my future SIL and I made her a back up diaper bag. I went to dollar general and stuffed it with diapers, wipes, toys, bottles, a blankie, sippy cup and infant AND children tylenol for under 30. (to include the bag) and I made her a personalized gift which cost me about 6 dollars to make. She was beyond grateful your cousin sounds like a complete asshole. onsie-60b9...defde8.jpg
Well of or not, and family or not, you can ask for help but never demand for it. It's a matter of self respect and dignity. The people that feels entitled like that lacks both.
This woman sounds like a nightmare. Since when do people request presents for a baby shower?! A wedding is one thing, but a baby shower? Modesty much? What happened to the good old days of politely accepting ANY present you were given which, btw, wasn't specifically requested.
BP, you may block me, but this is another ugly instance of American-bashing set up by a non-American contributor. Stupid, greedy Americans. And we, along with Bored Pandas the world over, participate. There are dreadful people the world over, but most are decent and kind. They're just not as much fun to ridicule. So just ease up. We're not all liars, influencers, or greedy boors.
You don't have showers after the first baby. If she's a nurse well then let her nurse friends be stupid and buy 100$ gifts. Doesn't her dr husband make enough? Homemade blankets are worth more than any 100$ gift
A )ex) close friend of mine invited me to her evening do at her wedding, actual wedding was for he new work mates under £20. She sent a list of what she wanted specifically detailing colour, size, make, shop etc. I had no problems, I bought her nothing and did not go. Only time I have spoken to her since was when she had a baby and I rang to congratulate her, nothing else. No idea where she is or how many further kids she had, do not care either.
Capitalism stinks! Monetising newborns like this is so tasteless. So American. Nasty, tacky people.
When a coworker or relative is having a baby, I crochet them a beautiful blanket made of the softest yarn and make it big so the baby can use it for years. No one has rejected my gift and I receive lots of compliments. If my gift isn't good enough, they can do what they like with it, but I will not be bullied into buying things. Period. Especially for my nieces and nephews when I will most likely pay for they college educations.
WHY is OP still making the blanket??? They're still putting all this hard work and it's clearly not going to be appreciated. This lady sounds like the kind of person who will just toss it in a dumpster or give it away. Send a pack of diapers and say good riddance.
Lmao some one was short on money and hoped to fleece their family!! People don't be afraid to snip snip that family
My aunt crocheted my daughter a blanket for my shower. My daughter is now 17 and STILL has that blanket. Sleeps with it under a pillow, takes it on vacations, hand washes it (it's falling apart and she doesn't trust the washer lol). I couldn't imagine turning down such a personal gift that was never mine to begin with. Also, no thank you cards? Whew, my dad's Aunts might've disowned me! Old school Italian women and they wanted every detail personalized down to the wrapping paper! Over the top, lol of course, but it taught me to always thank each and every gift, card, meal, etc.
Easy on the relatives, they were badly misinformed and changed views when told the truth. Sounds like the Mom was wise to Beth s ways from the start. Beth's a greedy parasite and a liar. I'm sorry for those kids.
i dont understand why you have to be so greedy and/or ungratefull.
A lot of people think handmade = didn't cost anything With supplies and how many hours you spent on it = pretty costly item. I make a few items for friends and family if they ask and keep the price cheap basically to cover basic supplies and figure I'm really paying myself like $2.00 an hour or less If they were too demanding I'd tell them how many hours it takes and I'm going to charge 10.00 an hour then
Heck nta! I've got boots older than my niece and she'd have grown out of anything I'd bought at any price. You can barely justify buying new clothes for a baby really
What are "maternity diapers"? I know a pregancy can cause a bit of leakage, which isn't that rare, but I'm not aware there are special diapers for this. Aren't just regular adult diapers fine enough? Are there even any? And if, is there any more to it than just being more expensive for the company making them stating that they're for this kind of leak?
Ugh, don’t you dare make that blanket! She doesn’t deserve one stitch of your time.
Don’t you dare make that blanket! No ma’am! She does not deserve one stitch of your time!
Whenever I see these I always notice there’s known replies saying that the poster is an asshole. I wish it had both sides/opinions.
She will throw it out, I wished she had saved her time and compassion. But Beth will be in charge and therefore I don’t see her using the blanket.
My aunt made my son a beautiful blanket when I was expecting him. It is my most prized possession in my son's mementos. This ungrateful woman is materialistic and greedy.
Agreed I still have a blanket from my grandmother and love it
Load More Replies...I was always told baby showers are only for the first baby. She is just plain greedy.
I was told the same, but I have heard of "baby sprinkles" now, which is generally meant to provide only disposable, needed items (wipes, diapers, I would imagine even nipple cream) that obviously you couldn't reuse from the first baby and would generally be much cheaper on the guests. I don't really have a problem with that, but demanding brand new supplies is bordering on tacky; requiring a set price is definitely well into tacky. I had my first baby shower and made sure that there were cheap things (under $10) as well as the aspirational gifts in case anyone was feeling very generous.
Load More Replies...Depriving her child from needed supplies...: if you can't buy the needed supplies for your own child. Just don't get kids... it's not someone else's responsibility to buy necessary baby stuff
My favorite gift for my first baby was a hand knit blanket, made by a volunteer grandma, for babies in the NICU. It covered his incubator the whole time he was in hospital, then it covered his tiny body at home and now it covers his 15 year old, almost six foot frame while he watches tv, does homework, plays Xbox, etc. It has loose yarn that I've had to knot to keep it from unraveling and I fear for it each time I wash this precious piece of my boy's history. NEVER underestimate something made by hand and with love.
Jesus Christ, I am too old for this type of s***. Is this the Family of 2021? Greedy, ungrateful, entitled a**holes? If you've never been close to a member of your family, there is a reason why. Leave it that way.
She's tacky for having a second baby shower and in control of it. I can't with these people.
I’m currently pregnant with my first child and I purposely made my registry with expensive and cheap gifts because I understand not everyone can afford the more expensive ones. I also have a few people who are making me gifts and I’m completely fine with that. I also am okay with people buying gently used items to save money because I’m not that bougie or sentimental. I really don’t understand moms like this
Are you serious?! Her cousin is a spoiled brat! Both she and her husband work in very good and high-paying jobs. Not only that, but she had a first son only 2 years ago, so his old supplies should still be perfectly usable! And they're both sons, so it's not like she'd be using masculine things for a little girl or vice versa. And yet, she has the audacity to not just ask for more (and EXPENSIVE) baby supplies, but also some things for herself too, like pajamas. And the OP said she has a habit of throwing stuff that she dislikes out, even if it's brand new and unused? Talk about waste! On top of all this, why would an unborn child need such expensive things that he'll grow out of in a short while? What's the problem with having a homemade blanket (a lot of people, including me, like those better than store-bought ones)? Why must she host two baby showers with a required gift instead of buying a few things herself? It's definitely like she's poor. Sorry, I know I'm ranting,
--but this just tends to enrage me. Thanks for reading xd
Load More Replies...I was always told baby showers were only for the first baby. And homemade gifts can be great! I made a blanket for my baby cousin when she turned 1 and I thought it looked amazing. And so did the rest of my family.
NTA. Firstly.... baby showers for second babies are greedy and tacky. They are only intended for first children. Secondly....Gift registries for any event that do not include generic cheap options catering for any budget are also greedy and tacky. Third.. who gives a flying fluke if you are 'depriving her baby of needed supplies'. SHE is the mother. Supplies are HER responsibility. If she cant afford them SHE shouldnt have another child. Finally, Making a blanket is a kind and generous offer and refusing such a gift is greedy and tacky. Anyone with any class would have kindly and gracefully accepted the gift.
As far as etiquette goes.. are you even supposed to have a shower for any following babies? I thought that was only for the first?
Some folks have one for a second, if there's a big age gap ---- the second child being utterly unplanned, five-ten years later than first, so there's actually a *reason* the family might have passed along baby stuff to someone else in the interim. (My mom, for example, didn't plan to have me, and I came along five years later, by which point, my sister was well pass playpens, etc., and so there was no need for her to keep it all, when her other family could use most of it.) I've never known anyone to have a shower for every single child, but maybe my family is weird.
Load More Replies...A baby shower for the SECOND child? Beth can f**k off. If you can't afford to buy your baby things, close your legs.
Hosting your own baby shower is incredibly tacky. A baby shower for the 2nd baby when the first baby is still a toddler is also a no no. The mother to be already has all the supplies she needs. A 2nd shower is just extortion. Of course the 2nd baby deserves gifts and love, but not in shower form.
What's with these people demanding gifts costing X dollars? It sounds like this woman is a re-gifter. She has no respect for the time it takes to make a handmade item, nor does she care that her cousin may have a strict budget.
Some people have an utterly ridiculous view of gifts. You want to celebrate your child, you invite people with who you want to share this moment, and they bring presents as a gesture of goodwill(something that they see fit and can afford). Of course, you can suggest or hint at what you'd like to get, but you don't get to complain if they chose something else. You are not placing an order on Amazon, your guests are under no obligation to buy what you ordered them to.
OMG NTA I went to a babyshower last week, for my future SIL and I made her a back up diaper bag. I went to dollar general and stuffed it with diapers, wipes, toys, bottles, a blankie, sippy cup and infant AND children tylenol for under 30. (to include the bag) and I made her a personalized gift which cost me about 6 dollars to make. She was beyond grateful your cousin sounds like a complete asshole. onsie-60b9...defde8.jpg
Well of or not, and family or not, you can ask for help but never demand for it. It's a matter of self respect and dignity. The people that feels entitled like that lacks both.
This woman sounds like a nightmare. Since when do people request presents for a baby shower?! A wedding is one thing, but a baby shower? Modesty much? What happened to the good old days of politely accepting ANY present you were given which, btw, wasn't specifically requested.
BP, you may block me, but this is another ugly instance of American-bashing set up by a non-American contributor. Stupid, greedy Americans. And we, along with Bored Pandas the world over, participate. There are dreadful people the world over, but most are decent and kind. They're just not as much fun to ridicule. So just ease up. We're not all liars, influencers, or greedy boors.
You don't have showers after the first baby. If she's a nurse well then let her nurse friends be stupid and buy 100$ gifts. Doesn't her dr husband make enough? Homemade blankets are worth more than any 100$ gift
A )ex) close friend of mine invited me to her evening do at her wedding, actual wedding was for he new work mates under £20. She sent a list of what she wanted specifically detailing colour, size, make, shop etc. I had no problems, I bought her nothing and did not go. Only time I have spoken to her since was when she had a baby and I rang to congratulate her, nothing else. No idea where she is or how many further kids she had, do not care either.
Capitalism stinks! Monetising newborns like this is so tasteless. So American. Nasty, tacky people.
When a coworker or relative is having a baby, I crochet them a beautiful blanket made of the softest yarn and make it big so the baby can use it for years. No one has rejected my gift and I receive lots of compliments. If my gift isn't good enough, they can do what they like with it, but I will not be bullied into buying things. Period. Especially for my nieces and nephews when I will most likely pay for they college educations.
WHY is OP still making the blanket??? They're still putting all this hard work and it's clearly not going to be appreciated. This lady sounds like the kind of person who will just toss it in a dumpster or give it away. Send a pack of diapers and say good riddance.
Lmao some one was short on money and hoped to fleece their family!! People don't be afraid to snip snip that family
My aunt crocheted my daughter a blanket for my shower. My daughter is now 17 and STILL has that blanket. Sleeps with it under a pillow, takes it on vacations, hand washes it (it's falling apart and she doesn't trust the washer lol). I couldn't imagine turning down such a personal gift that was never mine to begin with. Also, no thank you cards? Whew, my dad's Aunts might've disowned me! Old school Italian women and they wanted every detail personalized down to the wrapping paper! Over the top, lol of course, but it taught me to always thank each and every gift, card, meal, etc.
Easy on the relatives, they were badly misinformed and changed views when told the truth. Sounds like the Mom was wise to Beth s ways from the start. Beth's a greedy parasite and a liar. I'm sorry for those kids.
i dont understand why you have to be so greedy and/or ungratefull.
A lot of people think handmade = didn't cost anything With supplies and how many hours you spent on it = pretty costly item. I make a few items for friends and family if they ask and keep the price cheap basically to cover basic supplies and figure I'm really paying myself like $2.00 an hour or less If they were too demanding I'd tell them how many hours it takes and I'm going to charge 10.00 an hour then
Heck nta! I've got boots older than my niece and she'd have grown out of anything I'd bought at any price. You can barely justify buying new clothes for a baby really
What are "maternity diapers"? I know a pregancy can cause a bit of leakage, which isn't that rare, but I'm not aware there are special diapers for this. Aren't just regular adult diapers fine enough? Are there even any? And if, is there any more to it than just being more expensive for the company making them stating that they're for this kind of leak?
Ugh, don’t you dare make that blanket! She doesn’t deserve one stitch of your time.
Don’t you dare make that blanket! No ma’am! She does not deserve one stitch of your time!
Whenever I see these I always notice there’s known replies saying that the poster is an asshole. I wish it had both sides/opinions.
She will throw it out, I wished she had saved her time and compassion. But Beth will be in charge and therefore I don’t see her using the blanket.
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