No good deed goes unpunished! People have a ton of opinions if you happen to be a stay-at-home parent. Some are fully supportive while others nitpick every tiny little thing that you do, demanding things that go beyond common sense and neighborly courtesy. It’s these slightly entitled folk who have the potential to give you a headache, even if you’re doing them a huge favor.
Case in point, one woman turned to Reddit’s AITA community for a verdict about how she handled a situation when her son’s friend, a picky eater, came over to their house unannounced. Seeing as her family is Indian, the redditor, naturally, cooks a lot of ethnic food at home. However, her son’s friend wasn’t a fan of ethnic food. No worries, though—there were some frozen chicken nuggets and fries to save the day and keep him happy. But, boy, did that backfire when the kid’s mom later learned he was given frozen food!
Read on for the full story and how the internet reacted. Meanwhile, check out Bored Panda’s interview about kids being picky about their food with talented pie artist and author Jessica Leigh Clark-Bojin.
A mom shared how her son brought over his friend, a fussy eater who wasn’t a fan of the ethnic cuisine the family cooked at home
Image credits: cottonbro (not the actual photo)
Not wanting the child to go hungry, the mom looked to the freezer for inspiration. However, she couldn’t have expected the drama that followed
Image credits: Anna Pou (not the actual photo)
Image credits: wuestenigel (not the actual photo)
Truth be told, we’ll take each and every chance to eat chicken nuggets. Frozen or not, they’re our kryptonite. So it’s hard for us to even consider that someone might be mad after getting treated to a Meal from the Gods. (Look, if it’s good enough for Baby Yoda, it’s good enough for all of us.) However, it really doesn’t matter what the actual food was: the mom was kind enough to heat up some food for a picky eater who dropped by without any prior notice.
You really can’t expect someone to make a whole separate meal from scratch for someone when dinner’s already on the table. It might be something to consider with lots of prior warning and if there are certain dietary requirements that need to be met to keep the guest happy and healthy, sure, but this really wasn’t the case.
And it’s not like the kid wasn’t happy with the nuggets and fries (seriously, who can say ‘no’ to a classic combo like that?), it was his mom who had the issue. She thought that free childcare without notice wasn’t good enough—her precious baby boy needed a bespoke homecooked meal. What she called ‘child abuse’ really was just practicality and common sense. The vast majority of the AITA community members who read the post were confused about the picky eater’s mom’s over-the-top reaction.
Bored Panda reached out to pie artist Jessica to get some advice on what parents can do with picky eaters in the house. She said that one strategy parents could go for is hiding certain ingredients in other foods or simply naming things differently. A bit of creativity goes a long way. And it turns out that kids actually do like certain foods, just not the idea of them.
“My mum was occasionally successful in getting us to eat things we didn’t like by hiding the ingredients in other more innocuous foods. I refused to eat eggs in any form as a child. But I loved French toast, and never questioned the suspiciously-thick omelet-like covering on my syrup-drenched toast (I didn’t know that French toast involved eggs!),” she revealed to us.
“She would also trick us by telling us the food we were served was actually a different dish—one that she knew we tolerated. For example, my brother and I hated salmon but loved tuna fish. It never struck us as odd that sometimes we were served ‘pink tuna fish’ because it turned out we were actually totally fine with salmon, we just didn’t like the idea of salmon for some reason,” Jessica pointed out the fact that kids are just weird that way.
“Of course, when we were in our late teens our mum eventually fessed up and let us know that we had been eating eggs and salmon for decades and we might as well accept the fact that we like them now!” she said that the truth has to come out sooner or later. But by that time, it might not seem like a breach of trust. (I come from a family of picky eaters, I know how exhausting it can be to accommodate everyone’s preferences.)
However, the fact of the matter is that not every food can be disguised or hidden. Pie artist Jessica shared with us that she was an incredibly fussy eater as a kid.
“I am ashamed to admit it, but I didn’t try a shocking number of different foods until I was in my late teens,” she said, referring to “pretty much every vegetable that wasn’t a carrot.” That changed as she grew older.
“It wasn’t until I was invited to my first boyfriend’s home for dinner that it occurred to me that it might be time to broaden my culinary horizons. His mother frequently cooked ‘weird’ (not actually weird at all, but new to me) foods that I had always assumed I hated,” she told us.
“But out of a desire to not offend her, I, for the first time in my life, ate the hated foods… and it turned out I liked them! Societal pressure trumps parental tricks, threats, and bribery every time,” Jessica quipped.
The AITA community was overwhelmingly in support of the mom who wrote the post. Here’s what some of them said
It takes a lot of work to broaden our culinary horizons. Korean cooking teacher Heather Jeong told ABC News that lots of people are scared or uncomfortable with the unknown. She believes that education is the key to getting people to embrace different foods.
“Once they gain knowledge and understanding, they embrace it,” she said, referring to “robust, pungent Korean foods” like kimchi. However, that requires overcoming our bodies’ instinctive reactions to stronger smells. Unfamiliar food smells can cause immediate responses that we’re not in control of. And that can put us off trying something new (but delicious!) until we find the courage to grab a fork and dig in. Chicken nuggets are good. But developing our palates is better.
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"Child abuser" is when you force feed the child something they do not want or like. If the kid was willing to try something, he could've asked. He's fed, his needs were accommodated, a thank-you note is in order, not all that BS.
No one was force fed but when we were kids we ate what was put in front of us and didn’t complain. I ate liver and beef heart at one German friend’s house and I thanked them (but hated it). If we didn’t eat our dinner at home we had to sit at the table, or it was saved for our breakfast. That was life and food wasn’t wasted.
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Wow, NTA. My best friends mom is notorious for using pretty much only frozen food like this, I’ve been going over there to eat since I was five. My mom on the other hand has always (except for random lazy exception nights) cooks amazing dishes that take a long time to create. She never once berated my best friends mom for her choices and when he would come to our house, as the years went on, came to absolutely love my moms cooking but also never shamed his mom as well. To each their own. The two women still talk and are good friends. My best friend and I have drifted due to his life choices that I simply cannot be apart of. Still!! This woman accommodated this boy and she didn’t have to! Child abuse is a complete joke and that mom has some control issues.
Why do u think he made those life choices. That is what frozen food does to you. (Jk) OK I know the problem. Did anyone explain to her that she heated the food up before she gave it to him to eat. Why was it necessary for the ethnic to be added. It literally had no bearing on the story to have made a diff. Yea he didn't drop by unannounced. Your son is responsible for bringing over a friend without asking. I'd put money on it that they played in her son's room until dinner came out to eat and went back in until her highness came and picked up prince fussy britches. I have been a picky eater my whole life I actually just came to terms with it recently but I was raised with manners. I would have only taken what seemed palatable to me and probably only have taken a little bit to be respectful and not waste it. If you can't finish due to their portions. Politely ask for wrap it up. remember pls,Ty, etc. She provided an alt which was gen. The generations just fked and getng worse imo
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So let me get this straight, OP had this lady's kid dropped on her with zero notice, was told to look after him until 10 PM, fed this surprise guest a meal he enjoyed and the kid's mom has the audacity to complain about the meal?? I can't even begin to wrap my head around the level of entitlement some people have.
It's clear from OP's follow-up that she did ask the kid if he wanted what she was cooking for her family. Kid said no. If he'd said yes, and OP had forced him to eat the frozen meal anyway "because you're not part of our family" or some BS like that, then I'd understand why Mom's upset. But she did ask, the kid did say no, OP had a frozen meal she prepared for the kid, so Mom's just looking for a reason to be annoyed. "Child abuser," my lilywhite behind.
Honestly, if someone called me a child abuser I might sue them for slander. The boy had a choice: Chicken nuggets or indian foood. he chose the nuggets. End of discussion
I was a very picky eater as a child and I still don't like certain foods like for example mushrooms or bananas. When I was staying with a friend as a child and I didn't like the meal provided I would usually give it a taste to be polite and if I really didn't like it, just eat the side dishes. Today I tell people that I usually don't like X but I will try, and to please don't be mad/sad or worried that I don't have enough to eat. I'm still totally fine with eating the side dishes or salad. I don't expect anyone to go and cook me something different.
A nine-year old told his friend's mother that her food would make him gag? That's pretty rude, I think. I was a picky eater as a child and told my friend's mother that the bologna sandwich with butter didn't taste good. We always used mustard. She took away the sandwich and sent me home. Never ate at my friend's house again and I deserved it.
Boy's mom sounds exactly like the kind of people who shouldn't breed...
Geez, we lived off of Kraft Dinner a lot when we were kids in the late 70’s early 80’s, and I’m still alive? Was that abuse? Chicken nuggets weren’t invented but we would have thought they were heaven.
I would send your child over and have him ask for Indian food 😉 (of course you can't do that but just a little daydream)
I see the mom being vindicative about the imagined slight on her son, and trying to take it out on OP if he comes over. Stupid immature woman.
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"He very rudely refused to eat my cooking. Should I have not given him a meal at all?"
NTA she was very accommodating to her son's friend. When I went to friends' houses I ate what they served. This kid's mom sends him to a complete stranger's house and has the gall to cry abuse because he didn't get a separate homemade meal.
Who has their child stay at someone elses house that late for the first time without having it prearranged or meeting the parents first. My grandkids and anyone who comes knows that you get what you get and you dont throw a fit, period! She was nice to give him something else which she didnt have to at all.
She's a far worse mother for leaving her 9 year old (I think that's how old it said the kids were) with a practical stranger until 10pm, than the other mother is for feeding her child chicken nuggets and fries from the freezer. That's a perfectly acceptable meal, but 10pm is not a perfectly acceptable time for kids that young. If you pick the kid up at 10pm, then you probably won't get home before 10:30pm. That means he probably won't be in bed asleep until close to 11pm. 11pm is too late for a 9 year old. When my son was 9 his bedtime was 8pm. It's really important kids get enough sleep, for one thing human growth hormone is only produced when you're young and you're asleep. So if you don't sleep enough when you're young your growth is stunted. I've had terrible insomnia my entire life and I really think that's why I'm the shortest person in my entire extended family by several inches, while my son who has excellent sleeping habits is almost 6' and isn't even quite done growing yet.
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I'm guessing the boy was very happy with his meal because it's not allowed at home.
"Child abuser", really?! I don't get some parents. My mom would have been the same way as the Indian mom. She makes food. Eat it or don't. There is no alternatives. This mom was being very considerate when she didn't have to. I would have been mad at my kid for not, at least, trying the different food, first, as long as it didn't contain anything she's known to be allergic or intolerant to. And that kind of information would be given right away. This idea of asking or demanding someone make something else when they've just spent so much time and energy making food already wouldn't have flown.
Why do I get the idea that if your son goes over to the friends house that she will go out of her way to serve him chicken nuggets?
How could she have expected you to cook another meal for her child? The kid was fed.
Nta also i get that being nuggets the frozen food was processed but being frozen doesn't stop it from being a nutritious meal. Frozen food gets a bad wrap but stuff is frozen so fast from fresh like fish that it's probably in better nick than the plastic wrapped stuff on the shelf that's been sat there for a week or more. All i wanna see is kids with full bellies. She could have served him some of the families meal and let him go hungry ffs
Frozen food does get a bad rap. Fries are obviously not be the healthiest thing. Frozen vegetables however often contain more nutrients than fresh ones. It seems counterintuitive until you realize that frozen vegetables are picked when they're ripe and then flash frozen, usually in plants that are very near the farms the vegetables are grown on. Whereas vegetables intended to be sold fresh are picked before they're ripe and then stored while they're shipped from wherever they're grown to wherever you are. They never develop quite as many nutrients to begin with because they aren't ripening on the plant, and then they degrade during shipping and while they sit on the shelf. The shipping and degradation issues are eliminated by flash freezing the vegetables and so frozen vegetables very often have more nutrients.
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I was friends with a Philipino family and the mother always cooked ethnic meals. When I was invited to stay for lunch or dinner, I always ate what was offered. As a child growing up in the seventies, I was curious that white rice was always part of the meal, but I never was a picky eater. No matter what it looks like, I always try it. I was not taught that, I am just wired that way. I have a curious mind.
NTA, obviously. But some of these comments? I was picky as a kid. My mother didn't go out of her way to accommodate me, but she never forced food on me either. If I tried it, she was satisfied. If I didn't like what was served I could eat toast or leftovers of something else. Her parents had been the type to punish if you didn't eat everything in front of you and my mom struggled with food and her weight her entire life because of it. She didn't want that for my sister and I and she knew I was the type to come around in my own way. And she was right. I added more foods, little by little, and went whole hog in high school, when I met my best friend. Her family is Trinidadian and I never wanted to be rude, so I ate (and loved) everything. Kids aren't robots and the way you were raised isn't always the best way to raise your kid, even if you turned out okay.
Yes, exactly! Yikes to a lot of comments on here. My grandparents always refused to force us to eat anything because of how sick it made them and how horribly it affected their desire to try things when their own parents did it to them as kids. It can actually mess you up and affect how you view food for the rest of your life. That's what I'd consider abuse, but I guess that's just me.
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To me, the issue isn't even the food here at all. It's the level of entitlement of that Mom. She thinks she is punishing her by not allowing her son to come over there anymore. LOL. Yes, please, do us a favor, and don't ever drop your child off without asking again, and expect me to watch him for free, and feed him with MY food, and then complain. Remind me to be upset that you won't have anything to do with us. And while you're leaving, don't let the door hit you on the way out!! The absolute nerve of some people. LMBO. Maybe OP should send this woman a bill for the babysitting, AND the meal. 😂
Assuming this story is real…The kid was rude for asking for different food and saying it’d make him gag (unless he has a disability I suppose, we have a fam member like this but the mom just packs sep food for him). Now we know where he gets his rude behavior from.
The guest said he didn't like the smell. The OP was saying her son said the guest would gag if he ate it. I don't think the friend was disrespectful about anything. His mother is nuts though. Like "lady you know your kid doesn't like Indian food, anything else I would cook would be Indian cuisine as we're all Indian and that's the ingredients I buy. What was I supposed to do? He ate chicken and potatoes, not ding dings and ho-hos".
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One of my daughter’s friends was staying for dinner and I was making tacos. Her dad demanded that I order pizza. I told him I’d already started making the tacos and that was what I was serving. The jackass had pizza sent to the house while we were in the middle of dinner (and his daughter was happily eating a taco). I refused to pay for it…
Indian food certainly isn't for everyone (I like me some chicken Tikka whatever it's called), OP is obviously aware of this and carries alternatives. I would've lost my mind being told I should've made another meal for the other kid. WTF is wrong with chicken nuggets and fries? She should've told the other mom she made the nuggets and fries from scratch and even cut the nuggets into dinosaur shapes.
That is the strangest case of child abuse I have heard of. You kept him safe. warm, and fed. But some how it is abuse. Wonder what she would have thought of you made him eat what you served. Cause that is the only option in my house.
Having emigrated to the US from an African country, I have generally found Americans to be entitled, spoiled brats. They pass this attitude on to their children. If I tried something new and my kids really didn't like it after taking a couple of bites, I never forced them to eat it and never made it again. We lived near the school and invariably our kids would bring a bunch of kids home with them for lunch before afternoon sports. The kids ate what I made, never pulled faces or said eeww or yuck. The first time I dealt with that nonsense was here. I was also a sahm and parents took shameless advantage, sending their kids to me after school, expecting me to feed and take care of them. They also NEVER reciprocated or offered to bring any groceries or a few $$ to help pay for their kids' food. Every day one sees multiple stories about these entitled people, making other people's working lives miserable and more difficult than they need to be Not surprised this country is such a me
The boy was just a picky eater he wasn't on a special diet with restrictions. I see nothing wrong with giving him chicken nuggets and french fries. A lot of kids grew up on that stuff, and it didn't kill them as long as you did it in moderation. The mom even spoke with the kid's mom about him staying over so why didn't she mention her son was a picky eater. The host mom did everything she could besides driving to the store for somebody else's kid
I would have asked her if your child was at her house if she would have made a fresh Indian meal for him?
Is everyone glossing over keeping a 9 year old till 10 pm? Unless it was a Friday night I would've sent him home at 8. The other mom ITA!
1 Rule of being a guest if offered to sit at their table you eat what is offered unless there is a medical allergy reason you cant. Refusing is bad manners. To insult your host is bad form. Not to pay attention to the bad smell that left behind, happy that it was right from the start. It has saved you from future drama and danger. Open the window and air your place out
Child abuse is letting your child randomly take a bus somewhere without making arrangements with the adults first. Second...asking if he can stay until 10?? No question that she didn't plan her way into free babysitting. Even if my kid got on the wrong bus and it all just worked out this way...I would be like, I am so sorry you had to make a second meal...whatever it was.
I have an autistic daughter who has a very limited diet. I've tried everything to get her to expand her diet. Nothing worked. Yes I give her what she'll eat, and that means that it is often different from what the family is eating.
NTA OP. Doesn't school get out around 3pm? You watched this lady's kid and she has the nerve to tell you how you should do it without so much as asking if he could come over in the first place. Thank God she decided not to let him come over again. It's her responsibility to take care of her kid, if she wants him to have a freshly prepared dinner, she needs to get off work in time enough to make it for him. If she tries to pull this ' I'll be there by 10pm c**p'. Fix him some chicken nuggets and call the police to come get him cause his mother has neglected him again.
When I was young, I ate what was served or I didn't eat at all. Some of my greatest culinary memories are of getting a home cooked meal from the mother of a friend. This is how I was introduced to phillipino, Thai and Greek cooking ( lived in Jeddah, Saudi Arabia at the time).
How the SAH moms accommodations to an unexpected guest, her thoughtful kindness could be misconstrued as ABUSE, is beyond me.... it just especially stands out because if feeding a child that would not eat the prepared meal, chicken nuggets is abuse.... then what is it called when you're OK with your child just deciding on a whim to jump off the bus and go to a home of people you have never met.... until 10PM!! ?? Really..... what is THAT called if frozen chicken nuggets for picky eater is ABUSE??? Just wondering 🤔 🤦🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
I would have sent her a babysitting bill if she wants to be ungrateful.
Nta. Good lord. If feeding a child something that is basically a happy meal is child abuse, half the nation is in trouble!
Definitely NTA if the child didn't want the food they provided and provided the child with something they actually wanted what's the problem?
NTA! If anyone's wrong, it's the mom who let her kid stay over til 10 AT NIGHT!! Look, I understand that life happens, such as having to work late because of a fellow employee's absence or early departure, that's a given. But his classmate and his family were willing to accommodate him by allowing him to stay, and feeding him! Whether it's a home cooked meal (which the guest declined) or frozen food (which he ate) or even McDonald's, mom should've grateful that he got fed AT ALL!!!
I have exactly 3 pointa to make: 1) i would have text her "that's fine with me" and stopped worrying about the issue 2) the kid came to OPs house without notice, if it was me, i would offer him what i make for my family, if you don't like it, you can sit with us at the table, maybe have some side dish (like, if i was making something with rice, i would offer rice), but i would NOT cook anything special for him 3) 10 pm is waaaay too late for 8yo...
Instead of being an itch, she should have been grateful that her kid was fed and supervised. She basically dumped her kid on OP for 7 hours.
Guarantee the next time that lunatic woman is in a pinch for childcare she won't hesitate to ask this same SAHM for childcare again, and conveniently forget how she had insulted her.
Sounds like the nut-job mom in question needs to be fed a knuckle sandwich.
She was in a no win situation here. Can you imagine what that mother would have said if OP had let the kid choose not to eat the meal she cooked and not made the alternative she had on hand? Mother probably woulda called the cops or something crazy.
Always try a strange dish before asking what it is. It is surprising how often those yucky foods you wouldn't try on a dare are surprisingly good. Haggis for example is nothing more than an ordinary, lightly spiced sausage, but there is so much fuss because the ingredients are normal for sausage 🐶 Scrapple is simply cooked pork fragments in pork gelatin, but people will look at it and go ugh never thinking that the same dish jelled in a fancy mold is a plain variant of the fancy pork in aspic jelly served in fine restaurants. Lutefisk though, now that, like Limburger Cheese, olives and Durian fruit are acquired tastes (olives are great as an ingredient). Set aside your prejudices and try balut (hardboiled 18day duck embryo cooked in the shell), mangrove worm and escargot (snails)
I'm sorry but if someone else's kid just shows up at my door without their parent(s) talking to me first, they are going to eat what I make. Parent(s) don't like it, make other arrangements. I'm not here to cater to you. Nta
NTA...Next time tell them you're from Sweden and their kid can wait in another room while you eat dinner! Lol!! Good example where entitlement starts with the parents.
Eeewwww, just eeewwww! I'm concerned about the effect bein raised in such batsh*t bigotry will have on the son's friend. His mum's never had a b*tch- slapping- you can tell...
I WOULD SUE THE MOTHER FOR DEFAMATION OF CHARACTER FOR CALLING ME AN ABUSER
Ummm? WTF? I think you missed the point. Do you even know what racist means?
Load More Replies... "Child abuser" is when you force feed the child something they do not want or like. If the kid was willing to try something, he could've asked. He's fed, his needs were accommodated, a thank-you note is in order, not all that BS.
No one was force fed but when we were kids we ate what was put in front of us and didn’t complain. I ate liver and beef heart at one German friend’s house and I thanked them (but hated it). If we didn’t eat our dinner at home we had to sit at the table, or it was saved for our breakfast. That was life and food wasn’t wasted.
Load More Replies... Wow, NTA. My best friends mom is notorious for using pretty much only frozen food like this, I’ve been going over there to eat since I was five. My mom on the other hand has always (except for random lazy exception nights) cooks amazing dishes that take a long time to create. She never once berated my best friends mom for her choices and when he would come to our house, as the years went on, came to absolutely love my moms cooking but also never shamed his mom as well. To each their own. The two women still talk and are good friends. My best friend and I have drifted due to his life choices that I simply cannot be apart of. Still!! This woman accommodated this boy and she didn’t have to! Child abuse is a complete joke and that mom has some control issues.
Why do u think he made those life choices. That is what frozen food does to you. (Jk) OK I know the problem. Did anyone explain to her that she heated the food up before she gave it to him to eat. Why was it necessary for the ethnic to be added. It literally had no bearing on the story to have made a diff. Yea he didn't drop by unannounced. Your son is responsible for bringing over a friend without asking. I'd put money on it that they played in her son's room until dinner came out to eat and went back in until her highness came and picked up prince fussy britches. I have been a picky eater my whole life I actually just came to terms with it recently but I was raised with manners. I would have only taken what seemed palatable to me and probably only have taken a little bit to be respectful and not waste it. If you can't finish due to their portions. Politely ask for wrap it up. remember pls,Ty, etc. She provided an alt which was gen. The generations just fked and getng worse imo
Load More Replies... So let me get this straight, OP had this lady's kid dropped on her with zero notice, was told to look after him until 10 PM, fed this surprise guest a meal he enjoyed and the kid's mom has the audacity to complain about the meal?? I can't even begin to wrap my head around the level of entitlement some people have.
It's clear from OP's follow-up that she did ask the kid if he wanted what she was cooking for her family. Kid said no. If he'd said yes, and OP had forced him to eat the frozen meal anyway "because you're not part of our family" or some BS like that, then I'd understand why Mom's upset. But she did ask, the kid did say no, OP had a frozen meal she prepared for the kid, so Mom's just looking for a reason to be annoyed. "Child abuser," my lilywhite behind.
Honestly, if someone called me a child abuser I might sue them for slander. The boy had a choice: Chicken nuggets or indian foood. he chose the nuggets. End of discussion
I was a very picky eater as a child and I still don't like certain foods like for example mushrooms or bananas. When I was staying with a friend as a child and I didn't like the meal provided I would usually give it a taste to be polite and if I really didn't like it, just eat the side dishes. Today I tell people that I usually don't like X but I will try, and to please don't be mad/sad or worried that I don't have enough to eat. I'm still totally fine with eating the side dishes or salad. I don't expect anyone to go and cook me something different.
A nine-year old told his friend's mother that her food would make him gag? That's pretty rude, I think. I was a picky eater as a child and told my friend's mother that the bologna sandwich with butter didn't taste good. We always used mustard. She took away the sandwich and sent me home. Never ate at my friend's house again and I deserved it.
Boy's mom sounds exactly like the kind of people who shouldn't breed...
Geez, we lived off of Kraft Dinner a lot when we were kids in the late 70’s early 80’s, and I’m still alive? Was that abuse? Chicken nuggets weren’t invented but we would have thought they were heaven.
I would send your child over and have him ask for Indian food 😉 (of course you can't do that but just a little daydream)
I see the mom being vindicative about the imagined slight on her son, and trying to take it out on OP if he comes over. Stupid immature woman.
Load More Replies... "He very rudely refused to eat my cooking. Should I have not given him a meal at all?"
NTA she was very accommodating to her son's friend. When I went to friends' houses I ate what they served. This kid's mom sends him to a complete stranger's house and has the gall to cry abuse because he didn't get a separate homemade meal.
Who has their child stay at someone elses house that late for the first time without having it prearranged or meeting the parents first. My grandkids and anyone who comes knows that you get what you get and you dont throw a fit, period! She was nice to give him something else which she didnt have to at all.
She's a far worse mother for leaving her 9 year old (I think that's how old it said the kids were) with a practical stranger until 10pm, than the other mother is for feeding her child chicken nuggets and fries from the freezer. That's a perfectly acceptable meal, but 10pm is not a perfectly acceptable time for kids that young. If you pick the kid up at 10pm, then you probably won't get home before 10:30pm. That means he probably won't be in bed asleep until close to 11pm. 11pm is too late for a 9 year old. When my son was 9 his bedtime was 8pm. It's really important kids get enough sleep, for one thing human growth hormone is only produced when you're young and you're asleep. So if you don't sleep enough when you're young your growth is stunted. I've had terrible insomnia my entire life and I really think that's why I'm the shortest person in my entire extended family by several inches, while my son who has excellent sleeping habits is almost 6' and isn't even quite done growing yet.
Load More Replies... I'm guessing the boy was very happy with his meal because it's not allowed at home.
"Child abuser", really?! I don't get some parents. My mom would have been the same way as the Indian mom. She makes food. Eat it or don't. There is no alternatives. This mom was being very considerate when she didn't have to. I would have been mad at my kid for not, at least, trying the different food, first, as long as it didn't contain anything she's known to be allergic or intolerant to. And that kind of information would be given right away. This idea of asking or demanding someone make something else when they've just spent so much time and energy making food already wouldn't have flown.
Why do I get the idea that if your son goes over to the friends house that she will go out of her way to serve him chicken nuggets?
How could she have expected you to cook another meal for her child? The kid was fed.
Nta also i get that being nuggets the frozen food was processed but being frozen doesn't stop it from being a nutritious meal. Frozen food gets a bad wrap but stuff is frozen so fast from fresh like fish that it's probably in better nick than the plastic wrapped stuff on the shelf that's been sat there for a week or more. All i wanna see is kids with full bellies. She could have served him some of the families meal and let him go hungry ffs
Frozen food does get a bad rap. Fries are obviously not be the healthiest thing. Frozen vegetables however often contain more nutrients than fresh ones. It seems counterintuitive until you realize that frozen vegetables are picked when they're ripe and then flash frozen, usually in plants that are very near the farms the vegetables are grown on. Whereas vegetables intended to be sold fresh are picked before they're ripe and then stored while they're shipped from wherever they're grown to wherever you are. They never develop quite as many nutrients to begin with because they aren't ripening on the plant, and then they degrade during shipping and while they sit on the shelf. The shipping and degradation issues are eliminated by flash freezing the vegetables and so frozen vegetables very often have more nutrients.
Load More Replies... I was friends with a Philipino family and the mother always cooked ethnic meals. When I was invited to stay for lunch or dinner, I always ate what was offered. As a child growing up in the seventies, I was curious that white rice was always part of the meal, but I never was a picky eater. No matter what it looks like, I always try it. I was not taught that, I am just wired that way. I have a curious mind.
NTA, obviously. But some of these comments? I was picky as a kid. My mother didn't go out of her way to accommodate me, but she never forced food on me either. If I tried it, she was satisfied. If I didn't like what was served I could eat toast or leftovers of something else. Her parents had been the type to punish if you didn't eat everything in front of you and my mom struggled with food and her weight her entire life because of it. She didn't want that for my sister and I and she knew I was the type to come around in my own way. And she was right. I added more foods, little by little, and went whole hog in high school, when I met my best friend. Her family is Trinidadian and I never wanted to be rude, so I ate (and loved) everything. Kids aren't robots and the way you were raised isn't always the best way to raise your kid, even if you turned out okay.
Yes, exactly! Yikes to a lot of comments on here. My grandparents always refused to force us to eat anything because of how sick it made them and how horribly it affected their desire to try things when their own parents did it to them as kids. It can actually mess you up and affect how you view food for the rest of your life. That's what I'd consider abuse, but I guess that's just me.
Load More Replies... To me, the issue isn't even the food here at all. It's the level of entitlement of that Mom. She thinks she is punishing her by not allowing her son to come over there anymore. LOL. Yes, please, do us a favor, and don't ever drop your child off without asking again, and expect me to watch him for free, and feed him with MY food, and then complain. Remind me to be upset that you won't have anything to do with us. And while you're leaving, don't let the door hit you on the way out!! The absolute nerve of some people. LMBO. Maybe OP should send this woman a bill for the babysitting, AND the meal. 😂
Assuming this story is real…The kid was rude for asking for different food and saying it’d make him gag (unless he has a disability I suppose, we have a fam member like this but the mom just packs sep food for him). Now we know where he gets his rude behavior from.
The guest said he didn't like the smell. The OP was saying her son said the guest would gag if he ate it. I don't think the friend was disrespectful about anything. His mother is nuts though. Like "lady you know your kid doesn't like Indian food, anything else I would cook would be Indian cuisine as we're all Indian and that's the ingredients I buy. What was I supposed to do? He ate chicken and potatoes, not ding dings and ho-hos".
Load More Replies... One of my daughter’s friends was staying for dinner and I was making tacos. Her dad demanded that I order pizza. I told him I’d already started making the tacos and that was what I was serving. The jackass had pizza sent to the house while we were in the middle of dinner (and his daughter was happily eating a taco). I refused to pay for it…
Indian food certainly isn't for everyone (I like me some chicken Tikka whatever it's called), OP is obviously aware of this and carries alternatives. I would've lost my mind being told I should've made another meal for the other kid. WTF is wrong with chicken nuggets and fries? She should've told the other mom she made the nuggets and fries from scratch and even cut the nuggets into dinosaur shapes.
That is the strangest case of child abuse I have heard of. You kept him safe. warm, and fed. But some how it is abuse. Wonder what she would have thought of you made him eat what you served. Cause that is the only option in my house.
Having emigrated to the US from an African country, I have generally found Americans to be entitled, spoiled brats. They pass this attitude on to their children. If I tried something new and my kids really didn't like it after taking a couple of bites, I never forced them to eat it and never made it again. We lived near the school and invariably our kids would bring a bunch of kids home with them for lunch before afternoon sports. The kids ate what I made, never pulled faces or said eeww or yuck. The first time I dealt with that nonsense was here. I was also a sahm and parents took shameless advantage, sending their kids to me after school, expecting me to feed and take care of them. They also NEVER reciprocated or offered to bring any groceries or a few $$ to help pay for their kids' food. Every day one sees multiple stories about these entitled people, making other people's working lives miserable and more difficult than they need to be Not surprised this country is such a me
The boy was just a picky eater he wasn't on a special diet with restrictions. I see nothing wrong with giving him chicken nuggets and french fries. A lot of kids grew up on that stuff, and it didn't kill them as long as you did it in moderation. The mom even spoke with the kid's mom about him staying over so why didn't she mention her son was a picky eater. The host mom did everything she could besides driving to the store for somebody else's kid
I would have asked her if your child was at her house if she would have made a fresh Indian meal for him?
Is everyone glossing over keeping a 9 year old till 10 pm? Unless it was a Friday night I would've sent him home at 8. The other mom ITA!
1 Rule of being a guest if offered to sit at their table you eat what is offered unless there is a medical allergy reason you cant. Refusing is bad manners. To insult your host is bad form. Not to pay attention to the bad smell that left behind, happy that it was right from the start. It has saved you from future drama and danger. Open the window and air your place out
Child abuse is letting your child randomly take a bus somewhere without making arrangements with the adults first. Second...asking if he can stay until 10?? No question that she didn't plan her way into free babysitting. Even if my kid got on the wrong bus and it all just worked out this way...I would be like, I am so sorry you had to make a second meal...whatever it was.
I have an autistic daughter who has a very limited diet. I've tried everything to get her to expand her diet. Nothing worked. Yes I give her what she'll eat, and that means that it is often different from what the family is eating.
NTA OP. Doesn't school get out around 3pm? You watched this lady's kid and she has the nerve to tell you how you should do it without so much as asking if he could come over in the first place. Thank God she decided not to let him come over again. It's her responsibility to take care of her kid, if she wants him to have a freshly prepared dinner, she needs to get off work in time enough to make it for him. If she tries to pull this ' I'll be there by 10pm c**p'. Fix him some chicken nuggets and call the police to come get him cause his mother has neglected him again.
When I was young, I ate what was served or I didn't eat at all. Some of my greatest culinary memories are of getting a home cooked meal from the mother of a friend. This is how I was introduced to phillipino, Thai and Greek cooking ( lived in Jeddah, Saudi Arabia at the time).
How the SAH moms accommodations to an unexpected guest, her thoughtful kindness could be misconstrued as ABUSE, is beyond me.... it just especially stands out because if feeding a child that would not eat the prepared meal, chicken nuggets is abuse.... then what is it called when you're OK with your child just deciding on a whim to jump off the bus and go to a home of people you have never met.... until 10PM!! ?? Really..... what is THAT called if frozen chicken nuggets for picky eater is ABUSE??? Just wondering 🤔 🤦🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
I would have sent her a babysitting bill if she wants to be ungrateful.
Nta. Good lord. If feeding a child something that is basically a happy meal is child abuse, half the nation is in trouble!
Definitely NTA if the child didn't want the food they provided and provided the child with something they actually wanted what's the problem?
NTA! If anyone's wrong, it's the mom who let her kid stay over til 10 AT NIGHT!! Look, I understand that life happens, such as having to work late because of a fellow employee's absence or early departure, that's a given. But his classmate and his family were willing to accommodate him by allowing him to stay, and feeding him! Whether it's a home cooked meal (which the guest declined) or frozen food (which he ate) or even McDonald's, mom should've grateful that he got fed AT ALL!!!
I have exactly 3 pointa to make: 1) i would have text her "that's fine with me" and stopped worrying about the issue 2) the kid came to OPs house without notice, if it was me, i would offer him what i make for my family, if you don't like it, you can sit with us at the table, maybe have some side dish (like, if i was making something with rice, i would offer rice), but i would NOT cook anything special for him 3) 10 pm is waaaay too late for 8yo...
Instead of being an itch, she should have been grateful that her kid was fed and supervised. She basically dumped her kid on OP for 7 hours.
Guarantee the next time that lunatic woman is in a pinch for childcare she won't hesitate to ask this same SAHM for childcare again, and conveniently forget how she had insulted her.
Sounds like the nut-job mom in question needs to be fed a knuckle sandwich.
She was in a no win situation here. Can you imagine what that mother would have said if OP had let the kid choose not to eat the meal she cooked and not made the alternative she had on hand? Mother probably woulda called the cops or something crazy.
Always try a strange dish before asking what it is. It is surprising how often those yucky foods you wouldn't try on a dare are surprisingly good. Haggis for example is nothing more than an ordinary, lightly spiced sausage, but there is so much fuss because the ingredients are normal for sausage 🐶 Scrapple is simply cooked pork fragments in pork gelatin, but people will look at it and go ugh never thinking that the same dish jelled in a fancy mold is a plain variant of the fancy pork in aspic jelly served in fine restaurants. Lutefisk though, now that, like Limburger Cheese, olives and Durian fruit are acquired tastes (olives are great as an ingredient). Set aside your prejudices and try balut (hardboiled 18day duck embryo cooked in the shell), mangrove worm and escargot (snails)
I'm sorry but if someone else's kid just shows up at my door without their parent(s) talking to me first, they are going to eat what I make. Parent(s) don't like it, make other arrangements. I'm not here to cater to you. Nta
NTA...Next time tell them you're from Sweden and their kid can wait in another room while you eat dinner! Lol!! Good example where entitlement starts with the parents.
Eeewwww, just eeewwww! I'm concerned about the effect bein raised in such batsh*t bigotry will have on the son's friend. His mum's never had a b*tch- slapping- you can tell...
I WOULD SUE THE MOTHER FOR DEFAMATION OF CHARACTER FOR CALLING ME AN ABUSER
Ummm? WTF? I think you missed the point. Do you even know what racist means?
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