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Boyfriend Storms Off After Girlfriend Calls Out His Fragile Masculinity For Refusing To Buy Her Pads

Boyfriend Storms Off After Girlfriend Calls Out His Fragile Masculinity For Refusing To Buy Her Pads

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For the privileged part of the world, buying menstrual pads is like buying chewing gum. You don’t think twice about it, and why would you? But even here, where sanitary pads are not considered a luxury, unlike it is in many not-so-fortunate countries, some people find themselves having ambivalent feelings about buying them in public.

In fact, this is what happened to a 23-year-old woman whose boyfriend refused to buy her pads at a store because “he didn’t want the cashier to see him buying pads.” The girlfriend, who found it ridiculous and couldn’t stop laughing at that point, shared the incident on Reddit in detail, where it amassed 31.2k upvotes.

Turns out, the guy was not joking and as you can imagine, the incident escalated. It all ended with the author calling him out for fragile masculinity, and asking people online if she was right to do so. Share your thoughts in the comment section below!

After a woman got her period all of a sudden, she asked her boyfriend to buy her pads but he refused, sparking an argument between the two

Image credits: My Dream Collection (not the actual photo)

So she told her boyfriend that his masculinity was fragile and shared the whole incident on Reddit to ask people whether she was too harsh or not

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Image credits: sadlyambitious

And this is what people had to say about it

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zora24_1 avatar
Trillian
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow that escalated. She dodged a bullet there. WTF is wrong with these guys? My teenage son would buy that stuff for me. Not without complaints, but then he does nothing without complaining first.

blaasdf2 avatar
Hugo Raible
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

No, the reason is that an average super market has a 5 feet wall of pads of different sizes and brands and that there is not way to pick the correct ones for a guy.

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earloflincoln avatar
Martha Meyer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good grief, why are there so many men who think you can "hold in" the blood from a bleeding wound! That doesn't make any sense. I feel sorry for her for finding out he was such an uncaring guy this late in their relationship. The comments about birth make me afraid for any woman who might ever have kids with this guy.

jadewilliamson89 avatar
Jade Lynn - Panda's Brat
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

@Maria - sometimes life gets so busy you forget to stock up on things. Have you ever been cooking and realized you ran out of an ingredient? Your partner should be willing to help you out with things, and not expect someone to hold a period in! That would be somewhat like her telling him if he was having the runs really badly "just hold it in and go get your own pepto and toilet paper" or "you should have known this would happen at this moment and been prepared for it!" Periods don't happen like clockwork for every woman out there.

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jihankim avatar
Jihan Kim
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had no problem buying it for my ex. The only issue being a overwhelmingly wide range of products!

an-gu avatar
Anna Banana
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You're not alone! I once spent 10 minutes looking for panty liners that didn't have some obnoxious scent, and I still made a mistake because I didn't notice the fine print... (I ordered a bunch of washable ones that day so it's actually all good)

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jameskramer avatar
James016
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The only issue I have had with buying pads for my wife is which ones to get as there are so many brands. Now I have a picture of the box so next time I can just get them.

elichaffner avatar
Kiss Army
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband has always said he has no problem buying feminine hygiene products for me (as long as I am very specific about which ones!). He says he feels like strutting through the store with them because it proves he has a women at home - he may not be "getting any tonight" but he ain't "a sad single dude" either!

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mesmits avatar
Annabelle
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Major red flag. Besides being transphobic which is horrible. I think it is more about your partner not wanting to help you when it gets a little uncomfortable.

earloflincoln avatar
Martha Meyer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, he sounds like the type who will bolt when you need help the most, for example after a car accident or during chemo.

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kathrynbaylis_2 avatar
Kathryn Baylis
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Jeff Foxworthy did a bit about this years ago. He said he never minded buying feminine products for his wife, because it shows everybody in the store that he’s in a committed relationship with a woman. One of the best lines in the bit went something like, (proudly holding the box of tampons up) “I got a woman! What you got, Buddy? Playboy? I got a woman!”

mintyminameow avatar
Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Lmao!! Yes! That was my exact thought. Like, buying pads shows you are definitely getting laid. The first assumption would be that you were getting them for your wife or girlfriend.

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blue1steven avatar
Donkey boi
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was 12 when I was first sent to the shop to get some for my sister. I remember the lady at the till say, 'Um, do you know what you have there darling?' I was a very sarcastic child and so my response was, 'Yeah, pads, it says so on the packet! They don't feel "heavy" though!'. She completely missed it and carried on, 'You don't know what they are for? They're not for you!'. Being the shite that I was, 'Yeah they are! I use them as wrist rests when I'm playing on the computer AND put them under my armpits when I get sweaty! Just give me my change!'.

sofacushionfort avatar
sofacushionfort
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If he was too embarrassed to buy pads, imagine how he feels now, standing there buying a fleshlight?

terybriggs avatar
Mama Panda
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I raised my son (almost 19) to not be ashamed or scared to buy tampons, pads or anything else feminine for his girlfriend. He was at his girlfriend's house and both she and her mom started their periods and were out of pads. He jumped up, asked them both what they needed and dashed to the store. He came back with pads, heating pads and chocolate. I am so proud of him!!!

laurencaswell4 avatar
Lauren Caswell
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That is so awesome, way to go for mama and son, you should both be proud :) this is how we break the cycle of shame etc, by educating both genders :) I hope my son (currently 10) will have the same attitude, it's what I'm aiming for in regards to him being aware of the unfair biases in the world

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jaysonhammer avatar
TrickQuestion
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you're in a relationship with someone who needs pads, you get them pads if they need them. It's part of being in one. If you're not willing to get something they need not just regularly but as a basic health/hygiene item then it's likely you'll ignore other needs they may have.

hazelree avatar
Stille20
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Agreed. My father is a good man, but when my mother was very ill he struggled to take care of her physical needs. I moved in and did it, but it changed who I was willing to date and who I decided to marry.

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jencook avatar
JennyLaRue
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My dad used to cackle to himself at the checkout as he buried tampons or pads in frozen items as he packed the bags. It was only recently (after about 25 years of doing this) that I mentioned that we don't go home and use them right away. He was so disappointed!

sweetangelce04 avatar
CatWoman312
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was a cashier through college and men, women, children, elderly. They all bought things not meant for them. Everything from period products to hemorrhoid cream I scanned and I didn’t care. I’m there to do my job not judge you for what you buy. Even if it was a man buying pads for himself, we don’t care. We aren’t paid to judge what people purchase we just scan and go. Guy has serious issues and will be doomed forever single if he keeps these sexist views. Girl dodged a bullet

deannawoods avatar
deanna woods
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's what you are going to see in retail. People buying things that are not for them. I mean, I have bought adult diapers for relatives and I didn't have a panic attack wondering what the clerk thought.

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dc1 avatar
DC
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What is it even with mentrual stuff in general and american men? Europeans don't care, we just buy that stuff if it is on the list, and no one ever cared about it.

johnlouis avatar
John Louis
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This kind of toxic masculinity will, in all likelihood, manifest in other worst ways the longer you stay with him.

truthmonster00 avatar
Truth Monster
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Huge red flag when a partner sees their significant other in distress and does not try to act. This is a person who needs to do some growing up so they realize their momentary discomfort is superseded by the actual need of their partner.

melloncollie avatar
MellonCollie
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh wow, I'm so glad the girl asked about "what about helping me if we'd have a kid" - because it is very likely this asshat BF will literally have to (help her) change her pads at some point!

anibaldamiao avatar
Anibal Damiao
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

better find who the jerk was when you got your period than finding out after finding that your period wouldn't come :)

johnc_1 avatar
John C
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As I guy, I've never been at all squeamish about buying hygiene products, for me or anyone else. I mean, what are they afraid of - the cashier thinking it was for them? Why would they think that? I honestly don't get it at all.

malagotelli avatar
Eslamala
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Exactly! I assure you no woman, especially an overworked cashier, will even notice, let alone think it's for a guy...

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mpeapell_1 avatar
MAnahP
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As a young teen I was embarrassed to buy pads. My older brother (also a teen) had no problems buying them. He ended up making a fun joke with me calling them my brake pads. I still call them that now lol.

justamarineveteran avatar
Just a Marine Veteran
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't understand that at all. I was totally fine buying them for my gf even as a teen in high school. What is embarrassing about it? The cashier might realize that you know someone who is female?

lauradawson avatar
Laura Dawson
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good she left him, hopefully her situation will be sorted & she will meet someone who is a more mature & decent man than her ex. You can’t just “hold it in” you just bleed & it’s continual like a tap dripping (sorry for the analogy but it’s really annoyed me what he said) what a div he is.

harrylui avatar
Harry Lui
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Part of being a man is willing to take care of the people you love, this is a whiny boy.

katehargreaves678 avatar
columbokateUK
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How is it, in the Internet age, that young men are still so ignorant on female biology? We were taught this at school from about the age of 9 upwards. That was 30 years ago. Boys, Google is a thing, use it 🤷‍♀️

merlinthecat1 avatar
Monika Rhodes
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow- that guy needs some basic education. Hold it in? Wtf? My husband has 0 problem buying me tampons when I need them. To be forced to result in using toilet paper and having to go yourself because your bf is a prick is pretty sad.

mintyminameow avatar
Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah it’s so loveless too. Like, men can grasp that a period is often painful and difficult. We want a partner who can help. My partner buys me pads and chocolates and flowers or anything to make me comfortable on my period. It makes me so happy to be taken care of when I don’t feel well. Who would want a partner that doesn’t care if you are in pain? That’s scary.

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alrivas avatar
Beto River
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm a son, a brother of two sisters and a married man. I been buying pads and panty liners since I was 16 and had my license. Never ever did I stopped to think or care what other people thought of it.

sammyanne1_sh avatar
Helen Haley
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A friends husband always said he was proud to buy all feminine hygiene products for his wife. Visible, public proof, he had a woman.

leosorits avatar
Leo Sorits
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She got super lucky. That she found about all this now and not after marriage and kids

viviane_katz avatar
Viviane
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Or at the birth - he seems like the type who would turn green and walk out. Then complain, "The birth of my kid was soooo gross. I'm not touching diapers or burping them. What if it throws up on me?!"

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stevensedwards avatar
Hannah Edwards
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I once had a bf who refused to buy tampons for me because he said the person in the shop would think he was putting them up his bum.

viviane_katz avatar
Viviane
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yup, because the second he's out of earshot, the cashier will gossip: "Third guy today who comes in to buy disposable butt plugs. Do we have him on camera?"

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rl_2 avatar
R L
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Definitely the right move. 2 years is a drop in the ocean, compared to what it could have been. Uneducated and naive man.

dremosley avatar
Dre Mosley
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've bought pads for more than one GF. It's not a big deal.

onemessylady avatar
Aunt Messy
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She dodged a bullet there. There are times when the five minute 200 pound weight loss plan is perfect.

queenmiri avatar
QueenMiri
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This "boyfriend" is a disgusting being. Good for you that you broke up with him. Absolutely disgusting.

cristi_gregory avatar
Cristi Fitzke
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When are we going to stop treating menstruation & it's products as shameful? Obviously this idiot didn't pay attention in health class or he would know how periods work. Vaginal sphincters do not work the same as urethral sphincters. Bottom line if you love someone a little embarrassment wouldn't matter.

smckinney73 avatar
Shelley McKinney
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My ex liked getting the groceries and that includes getting the femanine products. First time he had to get me something he called me and had be talk to a female employee he found to help him (pre facetime). He had no issues.

heatheratwood avatar
Heather Atwood
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I was a senior in high school, I asked my boyfriend to buy me some tampons and he even bought a few different brands/sizes and he was NINETEEN!!! Get over it men!

linbot1 avatar
Lily Mae Kitty
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What was his thought process?! "I look like a guy...but I'm buying pads...so I must look like I cross dress...and have my period... AAAHHHHHHHHH!" wtf

laurent_seve avatar
MrLoufoque
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Whoa, the guy seems like a huge a-hole and she did good getting rid of him. If my girlfriend asked me to buy her pads, my only reflex would be to ask what brand and type, and get them the same way I do when she asks me to add some products (I once spent quite a long time looking for a very specific micellar cleansing water!) while I'm running errands.

leodomitrix avatar
Leo Domitrix
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Uh.... my hubby has always bought them. It felt odd to him the first time, but then, eh, it's just shopping, and who cares?

viviane_katz avatar
Viviane
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband asked, "Doesn't she buy him condoms?" He really didn't see the difference between that and buying pads and tampons - "You do it because you love the person".

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ificouldiwouldliveunderwater avatar
If I could I would live under water
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

@elStiJneriNO probably a troll but since English is only my third language, I googled the term "differentabled" and found that it's usually better to say "disabled". Someone wrote: "To call me and other disabled people differently abled is to diminish what is a very real experience for all of us." But either way, at least I know not to call them "cripple ".

stijn_vlas avatar
elStiJneriNO
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

it's my third too. But my point was : once cripple was okay to describe somebody unable to walk, then it becomes insulting and the correct word is another. But after a while people take offense to the new word and it continues. Since we are here with people who communicate in their 2nd or 3rd language, it's not nice to nitpick on words like that. and also very beside the point most of the times as we use the words we were taught in our 1st language. I just don't like that behavior where we always assume the worst of people. I think i actually also read such an article once about disabled people. Some don't even care about cripple because it's more specific to the disability to walk rather that the more generic disabled.

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mjwgjgema avatar
Mjw Gjgema
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In the fifties of the last century, menstruation was something you didn't mention. It was a woman's thing and men were supposed not to know anything about it. My fiancée at that time had a very irregular period and when it was there it was terrible. Onze were walking in town and suddenly she fainted and I saw blood stains on het skirt. I called a taxi and broght here home, telling my mother in law that she had e very bad period. What happened? She was outraged because I knew it and scolded my fiancée for a s**t beause her "secret" was now know to a man - as if she could have helped it. Thank God/Allah/Vishnu or whoever for the fact that circumstances now are different. If your girlfriend is good enough to have sex wit her, then why not for helping with her female problem. I would still have problems to buy condoms at the store, but when my granddaughter asked me tot take a package of Tampax because I had to go the supermarket anyway, it was no preoblem for me.

justinjpatel avatar
Justin Patel
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I chopped the tip of my finger off and as much as I tried to hold in the blood, I couldn't. Can't imagine it's possible to hold in menstrual blood either? She completely dodged a bullet leaving that moron.

virginieboutias avatar
Vi. B.
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Men (a LOT of them) really need to grow up, for f**k sake half the planet's population had, is having or will have periods at some point in their life, if you are not disgusted at buying toilet paper or condoms stop fussing.

pipekasuko avatar
Pipe Kasuko
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She should have packed up, picked up pads on the way home to her parents place! Definitely dodged a bullet.

megannavonod avatar
Megzymonsta
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I never get men like that. Seriously WTF!?!? When I see men buying pads and tampons in a shop I naturally assume they either have a girlfriend or are really nice guys getting them for a friend/relative. The young woman absolutely made the right choice to leave such a seriously immature and prejudiced partner. Every time I hear men whining about women "holding in their periods" I just want to punch them straight in their arrogant little faces

endisitompul avatar
Endishere
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

At this pandemic time, it is my part to go out for shopping, bimonthly. I see no "look at this man" views from other shoppers when I select and pick pads for my wife. I also hear nothing from cashier when checking out and paying all the items I bought. That man needs to have that experience first. He is just an overthinking guy who does not have many experiences yet, thus immature suited him.

pauldavis avatar
Paul Davis
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That girl needs to get away from that boyfriend and consider herself lucky that she learned what a self-centered pile of garbage he was before they got married or had kids.

deannawoods avatar
deanna woods
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

At one point, my dad lived in a house with a wife and three daughters who were all of menstruating age and if one of us needed him to buy pads, he went and bought pads. He didn't make stupid excuses and he certainly never said anything inappropriate about transgender people. This boyfriend sounds a little bit immature, sexist, and transphobic and she made the right move by leaving. Also he has some strange opinions about how women feel after giving birth.

malagotelli avatar
Eslamala
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ugh, what a pathetic insecure douche! Downvote me to eternity, but I can't fkcn stand insecure people (adults). I can't deal with them.

cristinadalzilio avatar
Cristina Dal Zilio
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am an insecure adult (lack of self esteem and self love, issues I'm working on). Although it is your right to don't like whoever you want, insecurity not always mean racism, lack of respect and common sense

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krisadhd_carrierdudoich avatar
Kris “ADHD_Carrier” Dudoich
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I actually saw a guy at Wal-Mart yesterday taking pictures of different Monistat and similar products (yeast infection treatments, for those not in the know) and texting the pictures to his wife to see which one she wanted. His young son was with him and I heard him explain to the boy that he wanted to make sure to wait to hear from "mommy" because he wanted to make sure he bought what she wanted. Too cool.

bellevuejenkins avatar
Bellevue Jenkins
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Immature selfish morons like this guy deserves to stay alone ... forever .... period :)

ilovethebacon avatar
Roger Haywood
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I buy my fiance feminine hygene products. No big deal. I don't care what the cashier thinks. lol

chiizkake avatar
chiizkake
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I kept waiting for the twist, like "awwww when he stormed out he went to just buy the pads and wasn't so bad after all!" or "awwww he said 'no' because he already got some knowing she'd need them when they moved in together!'..... but, nope, he's just a trashperson. Shame. She did it right kicking him to the bin.

ellebrace avatar
Elle Malkamäki
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hold it in 😂 are there really grown ass men out there that believe it works that way??

brenthollett avatar
Brent Hollett
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Advice for Young Men: Even if you don't have a girlfriend, by a pack of maxi-pads and a pack of light tampons, and keep them in your bathroom. Every woman in your life will appreciate it even if they see it and never need it. You're literally buying a cardboard box, but it can mean the difference between a fun day or a ruined evening.

tracycosta avatar
Tracy Costa
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't know how well this aged, but this reminds me of college in the mid-90s. A guy friend worked at a drugstore and would happily buy my roommate and I pads and tampons because he said, "The implication here is that I know a vagina well enough that I'm allowed to buy it accessories."

conniebohone avatar
Beans
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Are these even real? They seem like click bait to me. How can someone live with someone so long and not know they are like this? The way he just dropped hate speech so easily... have these gross hateful views he has never come up even once? If real this lady had some thickas rose coloured glasses.

brooken avatar
K1tt3n
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not click bait. Sadly, people like this do exist. It seems she didn't realize what a douche he was bc he hid it until the whole buying pads thing came up. Some people are really good at hiding how terrible they are. It's messed up.

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makaylabolton avatar
*hippie*witchy*bitch*
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

good thing she broke up with him. the more she found out the worse it got man.

bakerkaraj avatar
I_am_ace
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So the lesson of today is boyfriend is a transphobic, ablest toxic man.

oceanblue513 avatar
Znaya
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Allow me to approach this from a different point of view as I can understand both sides being a female. My ex husband did not have any problem buying pads for me because he grew up with sisters. You cannot change any male who felt like your ex did, you can't shame him into it. He has to want to change on his own. Don't assume because people love you, they will do anything for you, case in point! It's better to bring up these little situations before it gets too deep so you will each know who you are dealing with, don't take it for granted.

michaelswanson avatar
Lunar Bicycle
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Will he not buy diapers for a child because someone will think he s***s his pants? A douchebag who’s afraid to buy pads. Go figure.

amyharrell avatar
Amy Harrell
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can't count the number of times my husband had to go buy me tampons and pads after children were born and we live in a small town everyone knows everyone and everyone's business. He needs to grow up.

marilyndhelling avatar
Magicalmarilyn
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What an ass, my man has been getting mine for me for over 30 years. Now it's the other kind of pads

tribalista001 avatar
Gussi Gusii
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Been buying pads for my mother and sis since I was a kid, buy them for my GF too. What's the big deal? zzzzz

rosselairaeugeniecruz avatar
Lily
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I get my period suddenly, my friend, who's a guy, has no problem getting them for me. Well, the only problem is that there's a whole wall of pads and he never knows which ones to get. But other than that, he doesn't really care.

marneederider40 avatar
Marnie
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Any guy who's best guess is that women can "hold it in" and just choose to be gross instead - right there that is a reason to run, run, run and never look back. What sort of horrible mind do you have to have for you to just assume women are all disgusting creatures? You don't have to have ever been taught anything about it. If that is your guess, you have a very dark mind.

noneanon avatar
Random Anon
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Definitely NTA and she needs to get out of that relationship IMO. The dude is too immature and ignorant. I've even taken a photo of the packaging to make sure I get the right one. What's the big deal?

caseymcalister avatar
Casey McAlister
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The cashier and other customers probably won't bat an eye if you catch fire, let alone thinking something about a man buying pads.

gabbym avatar
Gabby M
Community Member
2 years ago

It's really important to destigmatize periods. We should teach all kids about them. They're just a normal part of many women's life.

azziza avatar
Azziza
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He's ridiculous for thinking people would think he's transsexual! Transsexuals don't need pads! Women changing to men are on testosterone which stops the period and men changing to women don't have uteruses or ovaries and thus no period either! She's lucky she saw this before they were even more entangled by marriage and children!

abbellahome_machiavelli avatar
Abbella DiNoto
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I just discovered “period panties”. They are under ware that can hold up to 4 tampons! I have horrible periods (finally my doctor after 30+ yrs of complaining, and filling a super absorbing tampon in less than an hour and me doubled over in her office crying hysterically). Is finally is going to order test! I swear people, men & doctors just do not get women’s menstrual cycles. They Are different and a woman can’t always be prepared especially when you bleed so heavily is like a deluge. Having accidents in public is a real thing! And a serious thing!

jamie_mayfield avatar
Ivana
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had a pregnancy scare shortly after switching birth control. My husband (then a still new boyfriend) stayed with me while our friend went to the store for us. I gave him a list, a chocolate bar, a bottle of wine, and a pregnancy test. He went and secured the provisions and I took the test. I came out and my boyfriend immediately panicked, I guess my face was still in that "Oh God No" state. I assured them that it was negative. We all watched a movie in our bed together, eating chocolate and drinking the wine. I asked if the clerk said anything to my friend when he bought everything. He laughed and told us the clerk asked if it was for celebrating or comforting, he said it would all depend on what the little pink stick showed but either way it wasn't his problem, that the possible parents were crying in the bathroom and he just wanted an excuse to get away from us. He and the clerk laughed for a good long time about it.

willowsweet_1 avatar
HooowlAtTheMoon
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow, definitely NTA, he sounds like someone you're better off without. I can't believe it. Dude, this is why I date girls. They understand things like this.

limoges68 avatar
Susan Judd
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am totally mystified how he could think a trans person could have periods. Ignorant as all f--k, and is a selfish p--ck.

deborahbrett avatar
Deborah B
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is an example of why the 'Won't buy you period supplies' red flag is such a red flag. It is an indicator of distorted attitudes and beliefs. I'm glad OP took the time to have this discussion with her boyfriend and uncover the underlying issues. I've known girls who use this as a test before moving in with a guy - just in a 'can you stop in an pick up some tampons for me on your way over' casual request. If it's a hard no, it sparks a discussion. Other tests include the "I'm going out with a guy friend" and "I can't go out this weekend, would you like to hang with me while I do chores and run errands." It's not about being manipulative, it's seeing if the expressed reactions and behaviour are what you want them to be - and bringing it up casually can get you a more honest and accurate response than straight up asking.

ii_3 avatar
I I
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OMG , i have a wife and two daughters , iv'e bought female products for them all , all different pads , tampons , heavy flow , light flow , night time , with wings , i know the products by the packaging now ive done it that often , he needs to grow the fck up , ohh and trannies dont get periods ffs

el_dee_1 avatar
El Dee
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

At first I tried to be charitable towards him (I know) I thought his obvious lack of knowledge on women had perhaps guided his decision (in part) But why would you refuse anyway? He is an asshole, hopefully this is a wake up call for him and he will learn from it. But she has been fortunate to find out what he's like before it's too late..

mikesimmons avatar
kerylcryer avatar
Keryl Cryer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That’s because you’re an adult. This guy isn’t. As several people put it, it’s a badge of (likely) heterosexuality. “I have a woman!” (Yes, I know it could be for his mother, his daughter, his sister, his roommate, whoever, but if the guy is between 20 and 70, people will probably assume it’s for a girlfriend or wife. That’s IF they think about it at all.)

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avantikacholleti avatar
MistyCat
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

*grabs bloody tampon* LEZZ GET HIM LADIES AND TRANS MEN AND OTHER PEOPLE WHO HAVE PERIODS IDK!!!!!!

nadyaraymond avatar
Nadya Raymond
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

All these men who keep thinking women can hold in period blood...I take it U men are seeing ur periods too and are therefore holding it in...please do tell us ur secret...tell us how so we too can hold it in

cindycollins_1 avatar
CincyReds
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So glad she left him. I know love is blind, but seems like some of these issues would have come up in the two years that were dating.

izzymcare avatar
Isabel Care
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

From the first lockdown, my brother, who lives with and helps our elderly mum, went to the supermarket (having phoned me for help) with the outer packaging for incontinence pads and panty liners. As I suggested, he asked for help from the pharmacy counter. Big, tough, scary looking bloke who will do anything for his loved ones. Proper man

kaitlinrabold avatar
anonymous
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

all these people leaving essay-sied comments about a fragile man afraid to buy pads for his gf. firstly, paper bags, renewable bags, even most plastic bags are pretty opaque, one bag for a few pads and no one will know he had them. secondly, nobody gives a s**t if a man buys pads, they'll prob assume it's for his gf or sis or whatever. so stfu and buy the damn pads

ldmonteith avatar
Lynne Monteith
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My son Was working at a new Pizza place when the only girl working got a little upset. The guys got it out of her that her period had just started. The plazza they were in had just opened so there wasn't a drug store open yet. My son says " I have some tampons in my car I'll go get them for you." The other guys just stop and look at him "Dude! Why have you got tampons in your car?" He just looks at them like they are nuts and says "Duh. I have a GIRLFRIEND!" He said you could see the gears working on these guys.

lorireese avatar
Lori Reese
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't know, I was never unprepared so much that I would have to ask my spouse to buy them for me. He would of course, but knowing that every moth it comes I would always have them on hand.

michel_2 avatar
Marcellus the Third
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why on earth would she post that question? His ego may be fragile, but so is her grip. He's outright refusing to help a human being while convenient to do so. It's a simple medical situation, give a 5min hand to bleeding human you claim to like without having to see or touch any blood... DTMA (Dump The Motherf* Already). Don't waste your breath on considering the situation.

ngaerew avatar
NWB
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Thank go there was a happy ending of her leaving!!! what a POS he is!!!!

payroll avatar
Tuna Fish
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OMG This is so much ado about nothing. I have a husband and three sons. When I had a hip replacement a couple of years ago my youngest son (22) was not working at the moment and agreed to stay home and help me after surgery. I told him I needed some pads and he did the whole OMG thing for a minute but went when I told him that no girl would think it was a big deal. He got home with a big smile on his face and said he liked the girl behind the counter and when he told her he was watching me and needed help buying my pads she was soooo happy to help and told him she thought it was so adult for him to do that like her dad buys them for her sometimes. He actually got a date out of it. Like I said not that big of a deal. FFS I buy boxer shorts and condoms for them, why can't they buy pads for me.

backatya7 avatar
backatya
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He's paying for them at least you can do is go get them yourself.

jamyirogers1990 avatar
Duchess Raven Waves
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow I feel so bad for her. My s.o was buying tampons for me when he was 16. We are in our 30s now. What a waste of organs.

stacywinnubst avatar
SBW71
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow. This guys parents obviously never talked to him about this. If he's like this his dad must have been the same way. Everything starts at home. Good thing she dumped him.

bigmamabadger avatar
Penny Fan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My partner, being the super efficient and well prepared ex-military man that he is, is the one who asks ME if I have enough pads/tampons lol

hazelree avatar
Stille20
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Her initial reaction was pretty bad, but that was definitely a discussion they needed to have. However, I don't how it took to years to learn that he was freaked out by "women stuff".

christelnellemann avatar
Christel Nellemann
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow, that guy had quite a few bad issues. Not helping his partner. Having really bad wrong ideas about female body is not good, but not being willing to listen to an actual woman telling you, that women cannot hold the blood back, thinking she is .. what.. lying?? Is right up disrespectfull , willfully ignorant and really stupid, a trait he will show in other subjects as well. The transfobia, the laziness, the fragile maculinity. Arg, run, run , and do not leave an adress behind.

ivannacerelia avatar
SunofSpringtime
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Thinking that you can hold period blood in is stupid, but kinda understandable. But still insisting on how that goes even after being explained how a period works by a girl who's experiencing it first-hand is..... I can't even. Totally dodged a bullet there.

k-jane39 avatar
Elio X
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not much to add but bullet dodged. That guy is the worst. I mean, he tries to argue with her about how a period works in the first place and cares more that a random person may judge him than he does about helping his girlfriend. No one really cares about your purchases and would probably assume that a guy buying pads is a nice person who is helping his friend/gf/wife/sister/whatever even they even bothered to think about it. He straight up admitted that he would not help her in anyway if they had a kid together even though she's the one who risks being maimed and dying from it. I recommend no kids personally but if you want them pick someone who isn't an insecure douchebag. Also, this is totally the kind of guy who leaves his wife if she becomes disabled, even temporarily.

janealexander37 avatar
Jane Alexander
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Loved him?, No. You loved the illusion until he destroyed it by showing his real self. You're not the first woman/man to love someone because of who we thought he or she was.

wolnertj_1 avatar
Theodore Wolner
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am glad that you were able to see his true colors before he could weasel his way deeper into your life. A kid gave me a funny look once when I was picking up pads for my wife; I just told him that "they work GREAT for polishing the Corvette!" ( I was driving a 1951 Willys at the time. ) What a dip, he actually believed me!

blaasdf2 avatar
Hugo Raible
Community Member
2 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

erine avatar
Erin E
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

“Hold it in” can we PLEASE teach men about basic anatomy?!?!?!

veni_vidi_vicky avatar
Vicky Zar
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Never an issue with my husband. But then... we don't have that toxic masculinity here. Our men even sit while peeing.

janvanput avatar
Chodz
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As childish as the guy clearly is, calling his masculinity fragile because he doesn´t want to do things he´s obviously very uncomfortable with is highly toxic behaviour.

veni_vidi_vicky avatar
Vicky Zar
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

For the US Americans (don't know how it is elsewhere): Do you use applicators with tampons? Fun fact: We don't use them in Europe. I never even knew applicators existed, before I heard it from an US American. Wouldn't even know how to use them.

michael-barbour avatar
Michael Barbour
Community Member
2 years ago

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Women should never run out of pads. You know you're going to need them so you should make sure you always have a stock. "But my period came unexpectedly early is no excuse" . I would never ask my bf to buy them for me. It's my responsibility.

viviane_katz avatar
Viviane
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sounds like you transitioned very recently. I've read that it takes a few months for the testosterone and hormone blockers to stop menstruation. Anyways, congratulations. :) If it turns out you don't need the extra pads, you can donate the stockpile to a local charity.

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Michael Barbour
Community Member
2 years ago

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Women should never run out of pads. You know you need them every month so make sure you have a stock. "But my period came unecpectedly early" is no excuse. I would never ask my bf to buy them for me. It's my responsibility.

pierrecouture3 avatar
Pierre Couture
Community Member
2 years ago

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womyn start their periods unexpectedly all the time. It's a common courtesy to have a variety of menstrual products in the bathroom for anyone who happens to need them. Check the brand first and see if they are supportive of all genders (marketing, packaging, etc.) Please don't buy that dollar store s**t, spring for the 'good stuff'. Maybe throw some chocolate in the stash, too.

yesanded_1 avatar
Ed
Community Member
2 years ago

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He's better off without her. She tries to force him into a humiliating experience as a result of her poor planning? The thing happens every month - how are you caught unprepared? And when he refuses to bend to her will, she tries to publicly emasculate him in front of the entire world? Good for him for sticking to his guns. The second you give in to that crap, you're a bitch on a leash.

godsroad avatar
Anna Cherpin
Community Member
2 years ago

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Why should be a man's job? I am a woman and I don't and never expected my husband to do this. Good for you boyfriend, it's not a man idea to do this but damn women who think they are entitled. Get over it.

robertthompson_1 avatar
Robert Thompson
Community Member
2 years ago

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I am with you on the pad thing. As a partner, he should take care of you. Just as you take care of him. What I didn't like about this post is that you assembled an army of people who side with you and then ambushed him.

kaching12 avatar
Yort
Community Member
2 years ago

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I don’t understand how people run out of pads. Whenever I’m running low, I buy a new pack so then I won’t run out even if my period starts unexpectedly. Apparently no other woman on the internet makes sure to already have a pack on hand?? Like how do you have your period, see that you have five pads left, and not put that on the shopping list and buy it as soon as you go grocery shopping next?

j_f_ avatar
J. F.
Community Member
2 years ago

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Idiot for sure, but the wording was a bit over the top. Throwing around "fragile masculinity" was not the best idea. While technically true it's not a good thing to say that as established - "FRAGILE". Besides, buying pads means nothing, I even used them for 3 months (open wound after operation on my tailbone)

earloflincoln avatar
Martha Meyer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I agree that it surely didn't help. But seeing his commenst about her needing help after giving birth, just confirm to me that he's an uncaring person in general.

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Nicess
Community Member
2 years ago

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Wait a minute, this happens every month and girls don't have it in bulk? I would have stashes everywhere!

pipekasuko avatar
Pipe Kasuko
Community Member
2 years ago

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She is the A-hole for coming back to that moron after having to buy the pads herself. She should have packed and left and picked up pads on her way to her parents home.

merlinthecat1 avatar
Monika Rhodes
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nooo- first things first- get yourself sorted out with pads so you feel better. No worse thing than having unreliable toilet paper to keep the blood in. I'd do the same and then leave the prick.

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paulbudhram avatar
Paul Budhram
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

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I'm gonna get 10,000 downvotes from this comment but i'll share it anyway. You have no idea what the boyfriend's point of view was. Maybe he had a bad childhood and wanted to keep his pride up... or maybe he was told to "man up" 1 too many times. You don't know, I don't know, and therefore I don't feel like people should say "NTA" or "YTA". (and fragile masculinity... what should I say about that?)

jadewilliamson89 avatar
Jade Lynn - Panda's Brat
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He was still unwilling to help her take care of herself even if she had just had a baby... because she wasn't "crippled" (his word) and should be able to do it herself. He has no concept of the reality of being a woman. He assumed that if someone saw him buying pads they would think he was transgendered. There is more wrong with this guy then just being told to man up or having a bad childhood.

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Gabi
Community Member
2 years ago

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This story is so old it has grown a long white beard.

pentecostaldove avatar
Maria Rodriguez
Community Member
2 years ago

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Um... It's not our men's job to buy our pads and tampons. It's our responsibility. It's nice when they will do it when we need but we should never expect or belittle our men for not wanting to. Be responsible buy products before you will need them.

harrylui avatar
Harry Lui
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Everyone makes mistakes, and if your partner isn't willing to help you out after you made a mistake, what good is the partner? Might as well be single.

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zipperzaza avatar
Zaza
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

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Aside from the bf being an asswipe, what the hell is wrong with all these women who never have tampons or pads until they are already actively bleeding Every single (american) period story on the internet features a woman who has no pads or tampons in the house. Ever. Unless they are already leaking through their clothes WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH Y'ALL You've been bleeding every single month for years now. You know it's not going to stop for years to come. Y'all are stupid and even though this bf is a moron, it's also unfair to put this on him because you were too lazy or too cheap to prepare for what you knew was coming

merlinthecat1 avatar
stijn_vlas avatar
elStiJneriNO
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

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Can't force the guy to do something he doesn't want. his body, his choice. But clearly both better off without each other if you can't accept to see through each others imperfections and make some sacrifices for eachother.

mayacoronado avatar
she/they and probably gay
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She is SO much better without him, he's transphobic, fragile and just an a-hole. You can't hold your period in, it feels like you're uterus is weighing you down, he should have got them for her.

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nakedmolerat avatar
Naked Molerat
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

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Oh, no! A man has a differing opinion and doesn't want to buy something. I know, let's insult his manhood! Yeah, that'll get him! Also, that poor flower. She was upset that a man didn't do what she wanted. How dare he!?

itisdarkestbeforedawn78 avatar
Beck(formerly Becca/Gizmo sq)
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He cared more about what a random cashier thought than his girlfriend. And he wanted her to "hold it in." I guarantee he was raised in a super religious house that has never seen any sex except missionary. Probably thinks she will get pregnant random ways like kissing. I have met people like this.

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zora24_1 avatar
Trillian
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow that escalated. She dodged a bullet there. WTF is wrong with these guys? My teenage son would buy that stuff for me. Not without complaints, but then he does nothing without complaining first.

blaasdf2 avatar
Hugo Raible
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

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No, the reason is that an average super market has a 5 feet wall of pads of different sizes and brands and that there is not way to pick the correct ones for a guy.

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earloflincoln avatar
Martha Meyer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good grief, why are there so many men who think you can "hold in" the blood from a bleeding wound! That doesn't make any sense. I feel sorry for her for finding out he was such an uncaring guy this late in their relationship. The comments about birth make me afraid for any woman who might ever have kids with this guy.

jadewilliamson89 avatar
Jade Lynn - Panda's Brat
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

@Maria - sometimes life gets so busy you forget to stock up on things. Have you ever been cooking and realized you ran out of an ingredient? Your partner should be willing to help you out with things, and not expect someone to hold a period in! That would be somewhat like her telling him if he was having the runs really badly "just hold it in and go get your own pepto and toilet paper" or "you should have known this would happen at this moment and been prepared for it!" Periods don't happen like clockwork for every woman out there.

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jihankim avatar
Jihan Kim
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had no problem buying it for my ex. The only issue being a overwhelmingly wide range of products!

an-gu avatar
Anna Banana
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You're not alone! I once spent 10 minutes looking for panty liners that didn't have some obnoxious scent, and I still made a mistake because I didn't notice the fine print... (I ordered a bunch of washable ones that day so it's actually all good)

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jameskramer avatar
James016
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The only issue I have had with buying pads for my wife is which ones to get as there are so many brands. Now I have a picture of the box so next time I can just get them.

elichaffner avatar
Kiss Army
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband has always said he has no problem buying feminine hygiene products for me (as long as I am very specific about which ones!). He says he feels like strutting through the store with them because it proves he has a women at home - he may not be "getting any tonight" but he ain't "a sad single dude" either!

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mesmits avatar
Annabelle
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Major red flag. Besides being transphobic which is horrible. I think it is more about your partner not wanting to help you when it gets a little uncomfortable.

earloflincoln avatar
Martha Meyer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, he sounds like the type who will bolt when you need help the most, for example after a car accident or during chemo.

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Kathryn Baylis
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Jeff Foxworthy did a bit about this years ago. He said he never minded buying feminine products for his wife, because it shows everybody in the store that he’s in a committed relationship with a woman. One of the best lines in the bit went something like, (proudly holding the box of tampons up) “I got a woman! What you got, Buddy? Playboy? I got a woman!”

mintyminameow avatar
Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Lmao!! Yes! That was my exact thought. Like, buying pads shows you are definitely getting laid. The first assumption would be that you were getting them for your wife or girlfriend.

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Donkey boi
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was 12 when I was first sent to the shop to get some for my sister. I remember the lady at the till say, 'Um, do you know what you have there darling?' I was a very sarcastic child and so my response was, 'Yeah, pads, it says so on the packet! They don't feel "heavy" though!'. She completely missed it and carried on, 'You don't know what they are for? They're not for you!'. Being the shite that I was, 'Yeah they are! I use them as wrist rests when I'm playing on the computer AND put them under my armpits when I get sweaty! Just give me my change!'.

sofacushionfort avatar
sofacushionfort
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If he was too embarrassed to buy pads, imagine how he feels now, standing there buying a fleshlight?

terybriggs avatar
Mama Panda
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I raised my son (almost 19) to not be ashamed or scared to buy tampons, pads or anything else feminine for his girlfriend. He was at his girlfriend's house and both she and her mom started their periods and were out of pads. He jumped up, asked them both what they needed and dashed to the store. He came back with pads, heating pads and chocolate. I am so proud of him!!!

laurencaswell4 avatar
Lauren Caswell
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That is so awesome, way to go for mama and son, you should both be proud :) this is how we break the cycle of shame etc, by educating both genders :) I hope my son (currently 10) will have the same attitude, it's what I'm aiming for in regards to him being aware of the unfair biases in the world

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TrickQuestion
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you're in a relationship with someone who needs pads, you get them pads if they need them. It's part of being in one. If you're not willing to get something they need not just regularly but as a basic health/hygiene item then it's likely you'll ignore other needs they may have.

hazelree avatar
Stille20
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Agreed. My father is a good man, but when my mother was very ill he struggled to take care of her physical needs. I moved in and did it, but it changed who I was willing to date and who I decided to marry.

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JennyLaRue
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My dad used to cackle to himself at the checkout as he buried tampons or pads in frozen items as he packed the bags. It was only recently (after about 25 years of doing this) that I mentioned that we don't go home and use them right away. He was so disappointed!

sweetangelce04 avatar
CatWoman312
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was a cashier through college and men, women, children, elderly. They all bought things not meant for them. Everything from period products to hemorrhoid cream I scanned and I didn’t care. I’m there to do my job not judge you for what you buy. Even if it was a man buying pads for himself, we don’t care. We aren’t paid to judge what people purchase we just scan and go. Guy has serious issues and will be doomed forever single if he keeps these sexist views. Girl dodged a bullet

deannawoods avatar
deanna woods
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's what you are going to see in retail. People buying things that are not for them. I mean, I have bought adult diapers for relatives and I didn't have a panic attack wondering what the clerk thought.

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dc1 avatar
DC
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What is it even with mentrual stuff in general and american men? Europeans don't care, we just buy that stuff if it is on the list, and no one ever cared about it.

johnlouis avatar
John Louis
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This kind of toxic masculinity will, in all likelihood, manifest in other worst ways the longer you stay with him.

truthmonster00 avatar
Truth Monster
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Huge red flag when a partner sees their significant other in distress and does not try to act. This is a person who needs to do some growing up so they realize their momentary discomfort is superseded by the actual need of their partner.

melloncollie avatar
MellonCollie
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh wow, I'm so glad the girl asked about "what about helping me if we'd have a kid" - because it is very likely this asshat BF will literally have to (help her) change her pads at some point!

anibaldamiao avatar
Anibal Damiao
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

better find who the jerk was when you got your period than finding out after finding that your period wouldn't come :)

johnc_1 avatar
John C
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As I guy, I've never been at all squeamish about buying hygiene products, for me or anyone else. I mean, what are they afraid of - the cashier thinking it was for them? Why would they think that? I honestly don't get it at all.

malagotelli avatar
Eslamala
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Exactly! I assure you no woman, especially an overworked cashier, will even notice, let alone think it's for a guy...

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MAnahP
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As a young teen I was embarrassed to buy pads. My older brother (also a teen) had no problems buying them. He ended up making a fun joke with me calling them my brake pads. I still call them that now lol.

justamarineveteran avatar
Just a Marine Veteran
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't understand that at all. I was totally fine buying them for my gf even as a teen in high school. What is embarrassing about it? The cashier might realize that you know someone who is female?

lauradawson avatar
Laura Dawson
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good she left him, hopefully her situation will be sorted & she will meet someone who is a more mature & decent man than her ex. You can’t just “hold it in” you just bleed & it’s continual like a tap dripping (sorry for the analogy but it’s really annoyed me what he said) what a div he is.

harrylui avatar
Harry Lui
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Part of being a man is willing to take care of the people you love, this is a whiny boy.

katehargreaves678 avatar
columbokateUK
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How is it, in the Internet age, that young men are still so ignorant on female biology? We were taught this at school from about the age of 9 upwards. That was 30 years ago. Boys, Google is a thing, use it 🤷‍♀️

merlinthecat1 avatar
Monika Rhodes
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow- that guy needs some basic education. Hold it in? Wtf? My husband has 0 problem buying me tampons when I need them. To be forced to result in using toilet paper and having to go yourself because your bf is a prick is pretty sad.

mintyminameow avatar
Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah it’s so loveless too. Like, men can grasp that a period is often painful and difficult. We want a partner who can help. My partner buys me pads and chocolates and flowers or anything to make me comfortable on my period. It makes me so happy to be taken care of when I don’t feel well. Who would want a partner that doesn’t care if you are in pain? That’s scary.

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Beto River
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm a son, a brother of two sisters and a married man. I been buying pads and panty liners since I was 16 and had my license. Never ever did I stopped to think or care what other people thought of it.

sammyanne1_sh avatar
Helen Haley
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A friends husband always said he was proud to buy all feminine hygiene products for his wife. Visible, public proof, he had a woman.

leosorits avatar
Leo Sorits
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She got super lucky. That she found about all this now and not after marriage and kids

viviane_katz avatar
Viviane
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Or at the birth - he seems like the type who would turn green and walk out. Then complain, "The birth of my kid was soooo gross. I'm not touching diapers or burping them. What if it throws up on me?!"

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Hannah Edwards
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I once had a bf who refused to buy tampons for me because he said the person in the shop would think he was putting them up his bum.

viviane_katz avatar
Viviane
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yup, because the second he's out of earshot, the cashier will gossip: "Third guy today who comes in to buy disposable butt plugs. Do we have him on camera?"

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rl_2 avatar
R L
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Definitely the right move. 2 years is a drop in the ocean, compared to what it could have been. Uneducated and naive man.

dremosley avatar
Dre Mosley
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've bought pads for more than one GF. It's not a big deal.

onemessylady avatar
Aunt Messy
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She dodged a bullet there. There are times when the five minute 200 pound weight loss plan is perfect.

queenmiri avatar
QueenMiri
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This "boyfriend" is a disgusting being. Good for you that you broke up with him. Absolutely disgusting.

cristi_gregory avatar
Cristi Fitzke
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When are we going to stop treating menstruation & it's products as shameful? Obviously this idiot didn't pay attention in health class or he would know how periods work. Vaginal sphincters do not work the same as urethral sphincters. Bottom line if you love someone a little embarrassment wouldn't matter.

smckinney73 avatar
Shelley McKinney
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My ex liked getting the groceries and that includes getting the femanine products. First time he had to get me something he called me and had be talk to a female employee he found to help him (pre facetime). He had no issues.

heatheratwood avatar
Heather Atwood
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I was a senior in high school, I asked my boyfriend to buy me some tampons and he even bought a few different brands/sizes and he was NINETEEN!!! Get over it men!

linbot1 avatar
Lily Mae Kitty
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What was his thought process?! "I look like a guy...but I'm buying pads...so I must look like I cross dress...and have my period... AAAHHHHHHHHH!" wtf

laurent_seve avatar
MrLoufoque
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Whoa, the guy seems like a huge a-hole and she did good getting rid of him. If my girlfriend asked me to buy her pads, my only reflex would be to ask what brand and type, and get them the same way I do when she asks me to add some products (I once spent quite a long time looking for a very specific micellar cleansing water!) while I'm running errands.

leodomitrix avatar
Leo Domitrix
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Uh.... my hubby has always bought them. It felt odd to him the first time, but then, eh, it's just shopping, and who cares?

viviane_katz avatar
Viviane
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband asked, "Doesn't she buy him condoms?" He really didn't see the difference between that and buying pads and tampons - "You do it because you love the person".

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ificouldiwouldliveunderwater avatar
If I could I would live under water
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

@elStiJneriNO probably a troll but since English is only my third language, I googled the term "differentabled" and found that it's usually better to say "disabled". Someone wrote: "To call me and other disabled people differently abled is to diminish what is a very real experience for all of us." But either way, at least I know not to call them "cripple ".

stijn_vlas avatar
elStiJneriNO
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

it's my third too. But my point was : once cripple was okay to describe somebody unable to walk, then it becomes insulting and the correct word is another. But after a while people take offense to the new word and it continues. Since we are here with people who communicate in their 2nd or 3rd language, it's not nice to nitpick on words like that. and also very beside the point most of the times as we use the words we were taught in our 1st language. I just don't like that behavior where we always assume the worst of people. I think i actually also read such an article once about disabled people. Some don't even care about cripple because it's more specific to the disability to walk rather that the more generic disabled.

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Mjw Gjgema
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In the fifties of the last century, menstruation was something you didn't mention. It was a woman's thing and men were supposed not to know anything about it. My fiancée at that time had a very irregular period and when it was there it was terrible. Onze were walking in town and suddenly she fainted and I saw blood stains on het skirt. I called a taxi and broght here home, telling my mother in law that she had e very bad period. What happened? She was outraged because I knew it and scolded my fiancée for a s**t beause her "secret" was now know to a man - as if she could have helped it. Thank God/Allah/Vishnu or whoever for the fact that circumstances now are different. If your girlfriend is good enough to have sex wit her, then why not for helping with her female problem. I would still have problems to buy condoms at the store, but when my granddaughter asked me tot take a package of Tampax because I had to go the supermarket anyway, it was no preoblem for me.

justinjpatel avatar
Justin Patel
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I chopped the tip of my finger off and as much as I tried to hold in the blood, I couldn't. Can't imagine it's possible to hold in menstrual blood either? She completely dodged a bullet leaving that moron.

virginieboutias avatar
Vi. B.
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Men (a LOT of them) really need to grow up, for f**k sake half the planet's population had, is having or will have periods at some point in their life, if you are not disgusted at buying toilet paper or condoms stop fussing.

pipekasuko avatar
Pipe Kasuko
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She should have packed up, picked up pads on the way home to her parents place! Definitely dodged a bullet.

megannavonod avatar
Megzymonsta
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I never get men like that. Seriously WTF!?!? When I see men buying pads and tampons in a shop I naturally assume they either have a girlfriend or are really nice guys getting them for a friend/relative. The young woman absolutely made the right choice to leave such a seriously immature and prejudiced partner. Every time I hear men whining about women "holding in their periods" I just want to punch them straight in their arrogant little faces

endisitompul avatar
Endishere
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

At this pandemic time, it is my part to go out for shopping, bimonthly. I see no "look at this man" views from other shoppers when I select and pick pads for my wife. I also hear nothing from cashier when checking out and paying all the items I bought. That man needs to have that experience first. He is just an overthinking guy who does not have many experiences yet, thus immature suited him.

pauldavis avatar
Paul Davis
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That girl needs to get away from that boyfriend and consider herself lucky that she learned what a self-centered pile of garbage he was before they got married or had kids.

deannawoods avatar
deanna woods
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

At one point, my dad lived in a house with a wife and three daughters who were all of menstruating age and if one of us needed him to buy pads, he went and bought pads. He didn't make stupid excuses and he certainly never said anything inappropriate about transgender people. This boyfriend sounds a little bit immature, sexist, and transphobic and she made the right move by leaving. Also he has some strange opinions about how women feel after giving birth.

malagotelli avatar
Eslamala
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ugh, what a pathetic insecure douche! Downvote me to eternity, but I can't fkcn stand insecure people (adults). I can't deal with them.

cristinadalzilio avatar
Cristina Dal Zilio
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am an insecure adult (lack of self esteem and self love, issues I'm working on). Although it is your right to don't like whoever you want, insecurity not always mean racism, lack of respect and common sense

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Kris “ADHD_Carrier” Dudoich
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I actually saw a guy at Wal-Mart yesterday taking pictures of different Monistat and similar products (yeast infection treatments, for those not in the know) and texting the pictures to his wife to see which one she wanted. His young son was with him and I heard him explain to the boy that he wanted to make sure to wait to hear from "mommy" because he wanted to make sure he bought what she wanted. Too cool.

bellevuejenkins avatar
Bellevue Jenkins
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Immature selfish morons like this guy deserves to stay alone ... forever .... period :)

ilovethebacon avatar
Roger Haywood
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I buy my fiance feminine hygene products. No big deal. I don't care what the cashier thinks. lol

chiizkake avatar
chiizkake
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I kept waiting for the twist, like "awwww when he stormed out he went to just buy the pads and wasn't so bad after all!" or "awwww he said 'no' because he already got some knowing she'd need them when they moved in together!'..... but, nope, he's just a trashperson. Shame. She did it right kicking him to the bin.

ellebrace avatar
Elle Malkamäki
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hold it in 😂 are there really grown ass men out there that believe it works that way??

brenthollett avatar
Brent Hollett
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Advice for Young Men: Even if you don't have a girlfriend, by a pack of maxi-pads and a pack of light tampons, and keep them in your bathroom. Every woman in your life will appreciate it even if they see it and never need it. You're literally buying a cardboard box, but it can mean the difference between a fun day or a ruined evening.

tracycosta avatar
Tracy Costa
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't know how well this aged, but this reminds me of college in the mid-90s. A guy friend worked at a drugstore and would happily buy my roommate and I pads and tampons because he said, "The implication here is that I know a vagina well enough that I'm allowed to buy it accessories."

conniebohone avatar
Beans
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Are these even real? They seem like click bait to me. How can someone live with someone so long and not know they are like this? The way he just dropped hate speech so easily... have these gross hateful views he has never come up even once? If real this lady had some thickas rose coloured glasses.

brooken avatar
K1tt3n
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not click bait. Sadly, people like this do exist. It seems she didn't realize what a douche he was bc he hid it until the whole buying pads thing came up. Some people are really good at hiding how terrible they are. It's messed up.

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makaylabolton avatar
*hippie*witchy*bitch*
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

good thing she broke up with him. the more she found out the worse it got man.

bakerkaraj avatar
I_am_ace
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So the lesson of today is boyfriend is a transphobic, ablest toxic man.

oceanblue513 avatar
Znaya
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Allow me to approach this from a different point of view as I can understand both sides being a female. My ex husband did not have any problem buying pads for me because he grew up with sisters. You cannot change any male who felt like your ex did, you can't shame him into it. He has to want to change on his own. Don't assume because people love you, they will do anything for you, case in point! It's better to bring up these little situations before it gets too deep so you will each know who you are dealing with, don't take it for granted.

michaelswanson avatar
Lunar Bicycle
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Will he not buy diapers for a child because someone will think he s***s his pants? A douchebag who’s afraid to buy pads. Go figure.

amyharrell avatar
Amy Harrell
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can't count the number of times my husband had to go buy me tampons and pads after children were born and we live in a small town everyone knows everyone and everyone's business. He needs to grow up.

marilyndhelling avatar
Magicalmarilyn
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What an ass, my man has been getting mine for me for over 30 years. Now it's the other kind of pads

tribalista001 avatar
Gussi Gusii
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Been buying pads for my mother and sis since I was a kid, buy them for my GF too. What's the big deal? zzzzz

rosselairaeugeniecruz avatar
Lily
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I get my period suddenly, my friend, who's a guy, has no problem getting them for me. Well, the only problem is that there's a whole wall of pads and he never knows which ones to get. But other than that, he doesn't really care.

marneederider40 avatar
Marnie
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Any guy who's best guess is that women can "hold it in" and just choose to be gross instead - right there that is a reason to run, run, run and never look back. What sort of horrible mind do you have to have for you to just assume women are all disgusting creatures? You don't have to have ever been taught anything about it. If that is your guess, you have a very dark mind.

noneanon avatar
Random Anon
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Definitely NTA and she needs to get out of that relationship IMO. The dude is too immature and ignorant. I've even taken a photo of the packaging to make sure I get the right one. What's the big deal?

caseymcalister avatar
Casey McAlister
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The cashier and other customers probably won't bat an eye if you catch fire, let alone thinking something about a man buying pads.

gabbym avatar
Gabby M
Community Member
2 years ago

It's really important to destigmatize periods. We should teach all kids about them. They're just a normal part of many women's life.

azziza avatar
Azziza
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He's ridiculous for thinking people would think he's transsexual! Transsexuals don't need pads! Women changing to men are on testosterone which stops the period and men changing to women don't have uteruses or ovaries and thus no period either! She's lucky she saw this before they were even more entangled by marriage and children!

abbellahome_machiavelli avatar
Abbella DiNoto
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I just discovered “period panties”. They are under ware that can hold up to 4 tampons! I have horrible periods (finally my doctor after 30+ yrs of complaining, and filling a super absorbing tampon in less than an hour and me doubled over in her office crying hysterically). Is finally is going to order test! I swear people, men & doctors just do not get women’s menstrual cycles. They Are different and a woman can’t always be prepared especially when you bleed so heavily is like a deluge. Having accidents in public is a real thing! And a serious thing!

jamie_mayfield avatar
Ivana
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had a pregnancy scare shortly after switching birth control. My husband (then a still new boyfriend) stayed with me while our friend went to the store for us. I gave him a list, a chocolate bar, a bottle of wine, and a pregnancy test. He went and secured the provisions and I took the test. I came out and my boyfriend immediately panicked, I guess my face was still in that "Oh God No" state. I assured them that it was negative. We all watched a movie in our bed together, eating chocolate and drinking the wine. I asked if the clerk said anything to my friend when he bought everything. He laughed and told us the clerk asked if it was for celebrating or comforting, he said it would all depend on what the little pink stick showed but either way it wasn't his problem, that the possible parents were crying in the bathroom and he just wanted an excuse to get away from us. He and the clerk laughed for a good long time about it.

willowsweet_1 avatar
HooowlAtTheMoon
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow, definitely NTA, he sounds like someone you're better off without. I can't believe it. Dude, this is why I date girls. They understand things like this.

limoges68 avatar
Susan Judd
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am totally mystified how he could think a trans person could have periods. Ignorant as all f--k, and is a selfish p--ck.

deborahbrett avatar
Deborah B
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is an example of why the 'Won't buy you period supplies' red flag is such a red flag. It is an indicator of distorted attitudes and beliefs. I'm glad OP took the time to have this discussion with her boyfriend and uncover the underlying issues. I've known girls who use this as a test before moving in with a guy - just in a 'can you stop in an pick up some tampons for me on your way over' casual request. If it's a hard no, it sparks a discussion. Other tests include the "I'm going out with a guy friend" and "I can't go out this weekend, would you like to hang with me while I do chores and run errands." It's not about being manipulative, it's seeing if the expressed reactions and behaviour are what you want them to be - and bringing it up casually can get you a more honest and accurate response than straight up asking.

ii_3 avatar
I I
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OMG , i have a wife and two daughters , iv'e bought female products for them all , all different pads , tampons , heavy flow , light flow , night time , with wings , i know the products by the packaging now ive done it that often , he needs to grow the fck up , ohh and trannies dont get periods ffs

el_dee_1 avatar
El Dee
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

At first I tried to be charitable towards him (I know) I thought his obvious lack of knowledge on women had perhaps guided his decision (in part) But why would you refuse anyway? He is an asshole, hopefully this is a wake up call for him and he will learn from it. But she has been fortunate to find out what he's like before it's too late..

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kerylcryer avatar
Keryl Cryer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That’s because you’re an adult. This guy isn’t. As several people put it, it’s a badge of (likely) heterosexuality. “I have a woman!” (Yes, I know it could be for his mother, his daughter, his sister, his roommate, whoever, but if the guy is between 20 and 70, people will probably assume it’s for a girlfriend or wife. That’s IF they think about it at all.)

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MistyCat
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

*grabs bloody tampon* LEZZ GET HIM LADIES AND TRANS MEN AND OTHER PEOPLE WHO HAVE PERIODS IDK!!!!!!

nadyaraymond avatar
Nadya Raymond
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

All these men who keep thinking women can hold in period blood...I take it U men are seeing ur periods too and are therefore holding it in...please do tell us ur secret...tell us how so we too can hold it in

cindycollins_1 avatar
CincyReds
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So glad she left him. I know love is blind, but seems like some of these issues would have come up in the two years that were dating.

izzymcare avatar
Isabel Care
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

From the first lockdown, my brother, who lives with and helps our elderly mum, went to the supermarket (having phoned me for help) with the outer packaging for incontinence pads and panty liners. As I suggested, he asked for help from the pharmacy counter. Big, tough, scary looking bloke who will do anything for his loved ones. Proper man

kaitlinrabold avatar
anonymous
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

all these people leaving essay-sied comments about a fragile man afraid to buy pads for his gf. firstly, paper bags, renewable bags, even most plastic bags are pretty opaque, one bag for a few pads and no one will know he had them. secondly, nobody gives a s**t if a man buys pads, they'll prob assume it's for his gf or sis or whatever. so stfu and buy the damn pads

ldmonteith avatar
Lynne Monteith
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My son Was working at a new Pizza place when the only girl working got a little upset. The guys got it out of her that her period had just started. The plazza they were in had just opened so there wasn't a drug store open yet. My son says " I have some tampons in my car I'll go get them for you." The other guys just stop and look at him "Dude! Why have you got tampons in your car?" He just looks at them like they are nuts and says "Duh. I have a GIRLFRIEND!" He said you could see the gears working on these guys.

lorireese avatar
Lori Reese
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't know, I was never unprepared so much that I would have to ask my spouse to buy them for me. He would of course, but knowing that every moth it comes I would always have them on hand.

michel_2 avatar
Marcellus the Third
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why on earth would she post that question? His ego may be fragile, but so is her grip. He's outright refusing to help a human being while convenient to do so. It's a simple medical situation, give a 5min hand to bleeding human you claim to like without having to see or touch any blood... DTMA (Dump The Motherf* Already). Don't waste your breath on considering the situation.

ngaerew avatar
NWB
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Thank go there was a happy ending of her leaving!!! what a POS he is!!!!

payroll avatar
Tuna Fish
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OMG This is so much ado about nothing. I have a husband and three sons. When I had a hip replacement a couple of years ago my youngest son (22) was not working at the moment and agreed to stay home and help me after surgery. I told him I needed some pads and he did the whole OMG thing for a minute but went when I told him that no girl would think it was a big deal. He got home with a big smile on his face and said he liked the girl behind the counter and when he told her he was watching me and needed help buying my pads she was soooo happy to help and told him she thought it was so adult for him to do that like her dad buys them for her sometimes. He actually got a date out of it. Like I said not that big of a deal. FFS I buy boxer shorts and condoms for them, why can't they buy pads for me.

backatya7 avatar
backatya
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He's paying for them at least you can do is go get them yourself.

jamyirogers1990 avatar
Duchess Raven Waves
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow I feel so bad for her. My s.o was buying tampons for me when he was 16. We are in our 30s now. What a waste of organs.

stacywinnubst avatar
SBW71
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow. This guys parents obviously never talked to him about this. If he's like this his dad must have been the same way. Everything starts at home. Good thing she dumped him.

bigmamabadger avatar
Penny Fan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My partner, being the super efficient and well prepared ex-military man that he is, is the one who asks ME if I have enough pads/tampons lol

hazelree avatar
Stille20
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Her initial reaction was pretty bad, but that was definitely a discussion they needed to have. However, I don't how it took to years to learn that he was freaked out by "women stuff".

christelnellemann avatar
Christel Nellemann
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow, that guy had quite a few bad issues. Not helping his partner. Having really bad wrong ideas about female body is not good, but not being willing to listen to an actual woman telling you, that women cannot hold the blood back, thinking she is .. what.. lying?? Is right up disrespectfull , willfully ignorant and really stupid, a trait he will show in other subjects as well. The transfobia, the laziness, the fragile maculinity. Arg, run, run , and do not leave an adress behind.

ivannacerelia avatar
SunofSpringtime
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Thinking that you can hold period blood in is stupid, but kinda understandable. But still insisting on how that goes even after being explained how a period works by a girl who's experiencing it first-hand is..... I can't even. Totally dodged a bullet there.

k-jane39 avatar
Elio X
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not much to add but bullet dodged. That guy is the worst. I mean, he tries to argue with her about how a period works in the first place and cares more that a random person may judge him than he does about helping his girlfriend. No one really cares about your purchases and would probably assume that a guy buying pads is a nice person who is helping his friend/gf/wife/sister/whatever even they even bothered to think about it. He straight up admitted that he would not help her in anyway if they had a kid together even though she's the one who risks being maimed and dying from it. I recommend no kids personally but if you want them pick someone who isn't an insecure douchebag. Also, this is totally the kind of guy who leaves his wife if she becomes disabled, even temporarily.

janealexander37 avatar
Jane Alexander
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Loved him?, No. You loved the illusion until he destroyed it by showing his real self. You're not the first woman/man to love someone because of who we thought he or she was.

wolnertj_1 avatar
Theodore Wolner
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am glad that you were able to see his true colors before he could weasel his way deeper into your life. A kid gave me a funny look once when I was picking up pads for my wife; I just told him that "they work GREAT for polishing the Corvette!" ( I was driving a 1951 Willys at the time. ) What a dip, he actually believed me!

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Hugo Raible
Community Member
2 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

erine avatar
Erin E
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

“Hold it in” can we PLEASE teach men about basic anatomy?!?!?!

veni_vidi_vicky avatar
Vicky Zar
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Never an issue with my husband. But then... we don't have that toxic masculinity here. Our men even sit while peeing.

janvanput avatar
Chodz
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As childish as the guy clearly is, calling his masculinity fragile because he doesn´t want to do things he´s obviously very uncomfortable with is highly toxic behaviour.

veni_vidi_vicky avatar
Vicky Zar
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

For the US Americans (don't know how it is elsewhere): Do you use applicators with tampons? Fun fact: We don't use them in Europe. I never even knew applicators existed, before I heard it from an US American. Wouldn't even know how to use them.

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Michael Barbour
Community Member
2 years ago

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Women should never run out of pads. You know you're going to need them so you should make sure you always have a stock. "But my period came unexpectedly early is no excuse" . I would never ask my bf to buy them for me. It's my responsibility.

viviane_katz avatar
Viviane
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sounds like you transitioned very recently. I've read that it takes a few months for the testosterone and hormone blockers to stop menstruation. Anyways, congratulations. :) If it turns out you don't need the extra pads, you can donate the stockpile to a local charity.

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Michael Barbour
Community Member
2 years ago

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Women should never run out of pads. You know you need them every month so make sure you have a stock. "But my period came unecpectedly early" is no excuse. I would never ask my bf to buy them for me. It's my responsibility.

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Pierre Couture
Community Member
2 years ago

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womyn start their periods unexpectedly all the time. It's a common courtesy to have a variety of menstrual products in the bathroom for anyone who happens to need them. Check the brand first and see if they are supportive of all genders (marketing, packaging, etc.) Please don't buy that dollar store s**t, spring for the 'good stuff'. Maybe throw some chocolate in the stash, too.

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Ed
Community Member
2 years ago

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He's better off without her. She tries to force him into a humiliating experience as a result of her poor planning? The thing happens every month - how are you caught unprepared? And when he refuses to bend to her will, she tries to publicly emasculate him in front of the entire world? Good for him for sticking to his guns. The second you give in to that crap, you're a bitch on a leash.

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Anna Cherpin
Community Member
2 years ago

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Why should be a man's job? I am a woman and I don't and never expected my husband to do this. Good for you boyfriend, it's not a man idea to do this but damn women who think they are entitled. Get over it.

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Robert Thompson
Community Member
2 years ago

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I am with you on the pad thing. As a partner, he should take care of you. Just as you take care of him. What I didn't like about this post is that you assembled an army of people who side with you and then ambushed him.

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Yort
Community Member
2 years ago

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I don’t understand how people run out of pads. Whenever I’m running low, I buy a new pack so then I won’t run out even if my period starts unexpectedly. Apparently no other woman on the internet makes sure to already have a pack on hand?? Like how do you have your period, see that you have five pads left, and not put that on the shopping list and buy it as soon as you go grocery shopping next?

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J. F.
Community Member
2 years ago

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Idiot for sure, but the wording was a bit over the top. Throwing around "fragile masculinity" was not the best idea. While technically true it's not a good thing to say that as established - "FRAGILE". Besides, buying pads means nothing, I even used them for 3 months (open wound after operation on my tailbone)

earloflincoln avatar
Martha Meyer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I agree that it surely didn't help. But seeing his commenst about her needing help after giving birth, just confirm to me that he's an uncaring person in general.

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Nicess
Community Member
2 years ago

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Wait a minute, this happens every month and girls don't have it in bulk? I would have stashes everywhere!

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Pipe Kasuko
Community Member
2 years ago

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She is the A-hole for coming back to that moron after having to buy the pads herself. She should have packed and left and picked up pads on her way to her parents home.

merlinthecat1 avatar
Monika Rhodes
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nooo- first things first- get yourself sorted out with pads so you feel better. No worse thing than having unreliable toilet paper to keep the blood in. I'd do the same and then leave the prick.

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Paul Budhram
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

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I'm gonna get 10,000 downvotes from this comment but i'll share it anyway. You have no idea what the boyfriend's point of view was. Maybe he had a bad childhood and wanted to keep his pride up... or maybe he was told to "man up" 1 too many times. You don't know, I don't know, and therefore I don't feel like people should say "NTA" or "YTA". (and fragile masculinity... what should I say about that?)

jadewilliamson89 avatar
Jade Lynn - Panda's Brat
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He was still unwilling to help her take care of herself even if she had just had a baby... because she wasn't "crippled" (his word) and should be able to do it herself. He has no concept of the reality of being a woman. He assumed that if someone saw him buying pads they would think he was transgendered. There is more wrong with this guy then just being told to man up or having a bad childhood.

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Gabi
Community Member
2 years ago

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This story is so old it has grown a long white beard.

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Maria Rodriguez
Community Member
2 years ago

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Um... It's not our men's job to buy our pads and tampons. It's our responsibility. It's nice when they will do it when we need but we should never expect or belittle our men for not wanting to. Be responsible buy products before you will need them.

harrylui avatar
Harry Lui
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Everyone makes mistakes, and if your partner isn't willing to help you out after you made a mistake, what good is the partner? Might as well be single.

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Zaza
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

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Aside from the bf being an asswipe, what the hell is wrong with all these women who never have tampons or pads until they are already actively bleeding Every single (american) period story on the internet features a woman who has no pads or tampons in the house. Ever. Unless they are already leaking through their clothes WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH Y'ALL You've been bleeding every single month for years now. You know it's not going to stop for years to come. Y'all are stupid and even though this bf is a moron, it's also unfair to put this on him because you were too lazy or too cheap to prepare for what you knew was coming

merlinthecat1 avatar
stijn_vlas avatar
elStiJneriNO
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

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Can't force the guy to do something he doesn't want. his body, his choice. But clearly both better off without each other if you can't accept to see through each others imperfections and make some sacrifices for eachother.

mayacoronado avatar
she/they and probably gay
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She is SO much better without him, he's transphobic, fragile and just an a-hole. You can't hold your period in, it feels like you're uterus is weighing you down, he should have got them for her.

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Naked Molerat
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

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Oh, no! A man has a differing opinion and doesn't want to buy something. I know, let's insult his manhood! Yeah, that'll get him! Also, that poor flower. She was upset that a man didn't do what she wanted. How dare he!?

itisdarkestbeforedawn78 avatar
Beck(formerly Becca/Gizmo sq)
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He cared more about what a random cashier thought than his girlfriend. And he wanted her to "hold it in." I guarantee he was raised in a super religious house that has never seen any sex except missionary. Probably thinks she will get pregnant random ways like kissing. I have met people like this.

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