Bullies Laugh And Film Woman Trying To Lose Weight In Gym, So This Random Stranger Avenges Her
It’s that time of the year when people are at the peak of their ‘new year new me’ phase, with only a week down the novelty surely can’t have worn off just yet, can it? For those of us who don’t bother with resolutions, it can be a mildly annoying period, with friends gushing over vegan recipes, having SO MUCH more energy without the booze and extolling the spiritual benefits of yoga. Meanwhile, the gym is suddenly packed with strangers wearing clean sneakers and snappily elastic lycra, striding the treadmills with a grimly determined intensity. Inevitably, however, things begin to settle and within a month or two normal service is resumed. Going to the gym especially can be a daunting experience for the novice, all those complicated-looking machines and lifting techniques take time to master. The last thing you need as a sweaty, nervous newbie is seasoned gym rats sniggering at your best efforts to build a solid routine, this alone could be the difference between success and failure. (Facebook cover image: shutterstock / Morakot Kawinchan)
Image credits: shutterstock / Morakot Kawinchan
So when somebody turned to Reddit for advice to help the newcomers adapt to the gym environment with the minimum of fuss, there were plenty of useful tips to make everyone’s life a bit easier. One story stuck out above the rest, however, because it shows the importance of understanding and empathy. Sure, that novice doing endless curls at the squat machine might be a bit annoying right now, but that was you once upon a time. What people need in an intimidating new environment is encouragement and support!
Here’s what people had to say about the inspiring story
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In endurance sports we have the following saying: "You do not need to be embarassed if you finish last. You only need to be embarassed if you did not even try." People making fun of those who try for good merely publicly display their own fragility and insecurity. In other words: we should cheer the loudest for those crossing the finish line last and possibly not having an atheltic figure. The reason for the latter can be manifold and what counts is that they want to make a difference.
Body shaming is ALWAYS bad. But body shaming in a sports place is the absolute worst! People come here to do something about themselves, and it's the only place and way to do it, and a selfish a*****e dares body shame that person right there? You could LITERALLY kill somebody like that, I'm not even exaggerating. And then they will criticize how "fat people" are too lazy to work out. Body shaming in a sports place happened to me too a couple of times. It made me wanna slap their faces until my hands got numb while crying the Niagara and shouting ethical questions at their c**p-faces. I just wished them hemorrhoids instead.
"And then they will criticize how "fat people" are too lazy to work out." This is what kills me. You can't b***h that people won't do something, then b***h when they do. (okay, clearly you can because so many people do it)
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I think that those gym egocentric posers who make fun of people trying to do something good with their health are nothing but obscene degenerates and no matter how much they work out, they will never be sexy in any shape or form.
I think most of them do it because they feel that the only way they can be superior or better than someone else is to put others down around them. I laugh at those people because I know that, due to their behavior, most of their relationships are fake and wouldn't be able to stand up to the slightest of problems. They have no true friends but only lackies that would gladly leave them in a heart beat when the next alpha comes along.
Load More Replies... There are so many videos on youtube with people doing things incorrectly. It is immature. It puts me off gyms and takes away humanity, help instead of laugh, mean girls is a movie, not a lifestyle.
"Mean girls is a movie, not a lifestyle." HAHAHA! That statement ROCKS!
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What kind of people try to embarrass someone trying to better themselves? Absolutely disgusting behaviour, I am glad the bullies got banned.
You may have heard: bullies hurt people in order to feel like they have power. Similarly, people are often judgemental to others in order to feel like they are morally superior. Also, bullies were often bullied in their past, or otherwise hurt. So the people trying to embarrass others who are trying to improve, are those who feel weak or insecure. I wonder if, in gyms, it has to do with people not being happy with their bodies, and taking it out on others.
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I'm glad the people who made fun of her got punished and that the guy helped her. At that moment he was like an angel for her.
I may have missed it, but I thought it was another lady that helped her? Reason I mention this is that I was under the assumption that men weren't allowed in the women's locker room. O.o
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I remember the model bodyshaming an elderly woman in the locker room. :( At my gym no phones/cameras are allowed during training. And in my experience most people at gyms are like the nice poster. Helpful, not judging, encouraging. I remember that I thought there would be a lot of bodybuilders just posing and model-like girls laughing about middle aged couch potatoes (me)...was so wrong! The hard working muscled men helped me with doing the kettle bell better, the feather-like 20ish girls helped me turning the treadmill on..and so on and so on. The only one with a judgemental mind was me before I got to know the members. (Yeah, it was out of fear but that doesn't make it better).
That model had charges pressed against her for that. Now I wonder what was her penalty.
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Good for her. I saw the same thing happen at my little community gym, and told the guys they were being rude and that instead of making fun of the woman they should offer support and encouragement. Or just keep their mouths shut, because I'd be going to management next, who do not tolerate that type of behavior.
Making fun of an overweight person at the gym is like making fun of a homeless person at a job fair. Both are trying to better themselves. Don't be that a*****e
The gym is literally the worst place to body shame someone.....what the hell they're clearly there because they want to make a healthy change. Help them!
I am a competitive bodybuilder and power lifter. Rude and childish behavior like this should never be tolerated and I am glad to know that the gym staff banned these inconsiderate fools. Personally, I get inspired and motivated when I see someone who obviously has a ways to go, grinding it out. These folks need to be given positive motivation to keep smashing it and the given the confidence to know that they WILL achieve their fitness goals! Do NOT let this unfortunate incident prevent any of you out there from going after it!
Bullying is NEVER acceptable. Thank God OP stood up to the bullies and got them banned. As everyone else has said here... bullies do so because they feel inadequate in their souls. Standing up to bullies ROCKETH!
I always remember reading a story on Drew Manning. He's a fitness trainer that used to think that overweight people used their extra weight as an excuse to be lazy and flake out on their workouts. He finally tried to prove to them that they were just whining by gaining 70lbs with the intention of losing it all again. Only it wasn't as easy as he thought it was going to be. The extra weight brought on depression and pain. His motivation was gone. He struggled like crazy to lose the weight and get back in shape. Now he has more respect for his overweight clients because he knows their journey is an every day struggle to stay motivated. And for those looking for a gym to work out in that does not tolerate the kind of behavior these three idiots displayed, go to the YMCA. They will not only guide you, but set you up on a routine that will work for you.
This sounds very interesting- and I like that he sounds empathic. But of course he was a super fit guy who just gained weight, no comparison with obese people who might never really have been fit, suffering from consequences (poor health) for being overweight for a long time and so on and so on. But really good for him that he tried to understand. (It also reminds me of starting running again- I was a good runner, and getting back in form meant to me, I KNEW how good it would feel, how muscles would adapt, how much fun I would have. A friend of mine really struggled because to her it was a lot of work and she did not know how good it would feel..she read about it but that is not the same. I also felt line my body remembered ...for her everything was new. So her work was much harder and a far greater achievement.)
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If only super fit people went to the gym.... there would be no fit people. That's the point of going to the gym. To become fit and then stay fit.
It’s also usually those people filming and taking the p**s who have terrible technique and are covering for their own insecurities by mocking others. As a trainer that behaviour sickens me and I actively encourage people to point it out to staff so that action can be taken
In all the years I've been going to gyms, I've never witnessed that kind of behavior. People are always supportive of each other and most of us look to those who are starting out with a little bit of hero worship. When I do a triathlon and see an overweight person participating, I think about how much harder and more effort it takes for them and I'm always proud of them. The folks who were laughing have some deep self esteem issues.
I've seen some real jerks at various gyms. It doesn't happen often, but when it does, it's ugly. The LA Fitness I go do recently banned two women and one man for verbally abusing a young man who was losing weight. ....///... No gym can afford to get a reputation for tolerating bad behaviour.
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I always wanted to lose my weight anf go to the gym. But, people around me always tease me badly about my plan. They keep on laughing and started to tell everyone about that . Even my family think it was funny. I always get body shaming by people around me ,even my family will do that. That make me really uncomfortable for who I am. All the situation I faced regarding with my look and size always make my self-confidence drop. I want to change. It wasn't because I want to look great like all the girl with bodygoal,but I'm so tired for always failed in my daily activities so are my job interview. That's why I always depressed sometimes.
It sounds like your family are the problem(You mentioned them twice), you could keep it secret from them, I don't know your living arrangement but if you live in a large city then you could join the gym and not tell them, you know they're going to ridicule you so set a body target that you absolutely will not share with anyone around you until you reach it and also join a weight watching group, for the morale support that you know your family and friends are in no way going to give you. You cannot always change the way your family are going to act so don't use up energy in trying just focus on your goal.
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I know exactly how she feels. I weighed 273 and now weigh 185. It took two years but I did it. I’m 6 feet tall so I was huge! It always makes me smile when I see someone put themselves out there who needs to shed some pounds. I always think Go Get ‘Em Girl! I know what bravery it takes to get started ...
I started going to a well-known chain gum, but it was in a very small town. Over the course of 10 months I lost a hundred pounds with diet and exercise. The guys at the gym were so supportive and encouraged me all the time. It really made a difference.
This goes to show that body shaming isn’t even about health as all the trolls like say. An overweight person trying to work out should be lauded by body shamers, not locked then. These a******s are just about controlling people, no one who fat shames gives a c**p about people’s health.
Why the downvotes? People don't even read the comment, they glance at a few words and do the deed. Geez
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This makes no sense. They'll mock you for being fat and tell you to eat a vegetable and exercise but then when you try to exercise they mock you and make fun of you??? It's just a no win situation! What a******s.
I've been there myself. Too embarrassed to even join a gym - so I took up biking, thinking I'd be safe from this type of judgement. I was wrong. The people at the bike store were clearly ... amused
They sound like jerks. I hope you bought your bike from a different store.
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I think that is why so many people lose hope; because someone is messing with them mentally; dude- people already have demons in their own head, and it took a LOT for someone to even walk in the gym!
Beauty is always inside. That´s what makes ppl look beautiful on the outside. This guy was absolutely human and kind and I really hope this lady gets healthier and finds peace for her lost.
I was always super self conscious at gyms until I joined my current gym and decided to fork out the extra money for a personal trainer. He’s in really good shape but he’s always very patient and sweet and never makes me feel awkward even when I totally fell off one of those step things trying to come back from a lunge after a particularly leg intensive workout. I was embarrassed but he was just worried about me being hurt. I work in a hospital and after seeing one too many 40 something year old come in in full cardiac arrest I decided I better get my stuff together and take care of myself. I’m terrified of ever needing cpr or heart surgery done on me. Gyms are there to help people get in shape, not as a hangout place for people to just stand around and bully others. They obviously weren’t focused on their own workouts if they had time to video other members. I’m glad the manager did the right thing.
Yes, thanks to the hero, I am stunned that the rude people are adults, that is a thousand times worse. Those adults should think, "But for the grace of God, go I" many people are born with issues, with little or no control !!!
I agree with all of the comments, this is despicable, cowardly and shallow behaviour. People like these morons is the reason many people are fearful of the gym. I imagine the people laughing are vastly uninteresting people, all they probably talk about is what they lift, what they run, what they eat blah blah blah constantly.
Man, why don't people just mind their own business if they have nothing good to add...
Fit people can make the gym an intimidating hell. It's like going back to high school with the cliques they form and who's in and who's out.
This is why I do not go to the gym. I do workout, mostly at home. I have asked for help from several different people. Even tried to hire a personal trainer and yet nobody seems to want to help me. I have no idea what I am doing when I am at the gym and only have ever asked for guidance, yet to be meet with silence from people. I have been at a plateau for months now, however, I still work out daily and hoping that I see some improvements. People like this are all over the place and this is why people who are heavy or do not know how to use the equipment to get results, do not go. Thank you to this person who helped her continue on her journey.
I stopped going to the gym years ago. I've gained 80lbs since I stopped. >.< I stopped because I was told members have access after 9:30PM and I worked 9AM-9PM and going to the gym after work just worked better for me. So I showed up at 9:20PM, ready to workout, and the lady who was on shift that night looked at me like I'd grown a second head. Her husband was there. He started verbally berating me. I explained that I had been told members have access after hours. He pointed at the door where the sign said 5AM to 9:30PM and called me a f*****g idiot. I packed my things, walked out and never went back. It was humiliating. I tried working out at home for awhile but I lost all motivation and next thing I knew I had swelled in weight. *sigh* I want to go back but don't think I'll be able to without someone to go with. I just lack the courage and am worried about being yelled at or berated again if I misunderstand or get misinformation.
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stuff like this is why i'm so uncomfortable going to the gym. yes i don't seem to be getting better. i have to be in a flawlessly happy state of mind to go because i know when i do people will be mocking my weights or pacing. i'm not fast, i'm heavy, i'm also not trying as much as i'd like to because people are terrifying
Earbuds. Seriously. Find a quiet place in your mind and just do your thing. And look around you. These people are NOT all glamour babes and you'll find that some of them are just like you.
Load More Replies... For everyone complaining about the plus sized superheroes, this is the other side of it.
At my gym I stood on the scales and I was 48 but the scales said I had a 50 year old body. two Army guys then stood on the scales and even though they were in their 30s, the scales put them at mid 20s. I made myself a vow Having access to a free gym and pool and a beautiful running trail beside the river, I set myself targets. On my 50th birthday I stood on the scales - they said my internal age was 50. On my 51st birthday I stood on the scales - my internal age was 50, on my 52 birthday I stood on the scales, my internal age was 49. I had done it. Unfortunately I was retrenched not too long after this, I did undo some of the good work, but this year, I have lost 20kilograms and my dog and I are looking the better for it. And I still wear skummy clothes when I walk the dog - I have a dog to protect me - who do I want to impress? no-one but me.
I used to wear really skummy clothes to the gym - after all I was there to work out not to make out - The turning point for me was when two Special Forces guys who had been coming to the Defence Gym on an off whenever they were back from wherever they went to - well they said to me "Wow you are looking good - keep up the hard work" There I was, good sneakers mismatched socks, paint spattered shorts, half leggings, t-shirt hand-me-up from my brother, all sweat stained. One of the proudest moments in my life.
if someone looks like they're having a tough time I tell them they're starting the day right by going to the gym or that they did great on whatever machine they're on. so many of us are self conscious it helps if we have someone who's looking at us say something positive. Then we don't have that anxiety of "what an I doing here?" or " not good enough for them" We all know people look at us.Make it positive.
I hope this woman continues to take care of herself and continues to go to the gym. Never let people who are ugly on the inside impact your life. Ignore them. Avoid them. Fate/Karma will take care of them. To the person that put themselves out there to be a friend to this woman, thank you for that. Your kindness changed someones life, for the better.
The bullies not only lost their gym, they lost the chance to help a fellow human being and that is sadder.
I have a nephew who loves the gym. He is the kind of person like the author, he wants everyone to enjoy themselves and offers encouragement to other folks at the gym.
be proud of yourself and f@ck the one who bullies you, they just show their very low IQ and EQ
A few years back I lost 130lbs. Up until that time (after having 8 children) I had pretty much given up trying to lose; every time I lost 30lbs I would get pregnant again lol. So I went for nearly 20 years being overweight. My late husband, bless his heart, never said one negative thing to me about it..."lose if you want to, or not" he would say. "Do it for YOU." Anyway, I finally did it. But it taught me a very valuable lesson in "the doing" of it, which I will never forget. NEVER JUDGE. You don't know what that other person has gone through in his/her life to end up overweight. It could be emotional eating (due to depression, grief, w/e); it could be hormonal; it could be hereditary; it could be any number of things. And when I see an overweight person on the street I remind myself, "Maybe he had broiled chicken and a salad for lunch." "Maybe she has already lost 10lbs!" "Maybe maybe maybe...." It is not my place to say...so I don't. I just say a prayer for them...
There's a wonderful marketing opportunity for that gym (and all other gyms) to use overweight and out of shape people in their ads. Especially using something like the #1 upvoted comment from Hans: "You do not need to be embarassed if you finish last. You only need to be embarrassed if you did not even try."
My gym has a strict no video recording or photo policy and that makes me extremely happy because I know I’m not being filmed to be the next bullied viral target online I wish more gyms had this policy.
This is the reason I do not go to the gym. I've seen acquaintances post stuff to their Snapchat or IG making fun of others. It is so childish especially when they're the health nuts telling others to get fit.
I saw a very overweight woman at the gym yesterday and I teared up, thinking what courage it takes to go to the gym, with tons of really fit people and tackle such an overwhelming endeavor of getting in shape. I was so moved by her courage! She's was my hero of the day!
I’ve always hated going to the gym. Especially being in college and my only free time is when it’s the most packed with meatheads. My advice to anyone would be to not care and if that’s a little too hard at first that’s fine, go late at night or early morning, I’ve noticed that seems to be when the real guinely nice lifters go. They don’t judge but they might just give you some pointers because they remember how awful their squats, deadlifts, etc looked when they started.
Unfortunately this isn't a single occurrence as it happened to me too. I haven't been to a gym again. It just annoys me because people are so critical of those who are overweight and obese even though they know nothing about them. I just wish people could stop thinking they have a right to judge and comment on others lives and look after their own.
I am 53 years old, work out daily, cardio etc. in order to stay fit, be and feel healthy & to be able to sleep at night. People like these aholes p**s me off when I hear and see this type of b******t happen. But instead of confronting the aholes first I go to the person they are belittling and offer encouragement. It just so happens that in doing so I tell him, or her, what my opinion of people who mess with others who are trying to improve thselves is. It is sickening that this middle and high school behavior continues on into people's adult lives. I've only had one time when the bullies would not leave the poor guy alone until they were told to leave the gym and not come back. Life is difficult enough without aholes trying to make themselves feel better by picking on others.
So sad to treat people like that. It only goes to show that age does not equal wisdom. Thank you for being kind to that woman. You were her hero.👍
Bright blessings on that nice stranger for helping that woman - and poxes on the slimewads that body-shamed her!
Side note: This is an extension of fat shaming. The kind that everyone claims is for someone else's own good, and not just them being a ick. Making fun of someone is never ever helping them. Telling them they're fat, doing food or exercise wrong in a mean spirited manner is never ok. Telling people they're fat and un healthy (like they don't realize it) is not helpful, it is harmful and just people being massive jerks.
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I'll say it again: mind your own damn business people and everyone will be happier. It's none of your business if someone is obese and works out. Look at yourself and focus on yourself and let other live.
The very fact that she showed up at the gym shows that she really was trying to better herself. No-one deserves to be bullied whatever size or shape.
These bullies can't have it both ways, so the best thing for them to do would be to just STFU.
JonSnow1982: You ROCK. GD Bless you !! I find it very sobering and heartwarming that there are people like you in this world. That. Is. All.
I was a pretty healthy kid growing up. Never fat but never really skinny or muscular. After a battle with severe depression and anxiety, I had gained 40lbs. When I went to the gym I could sense people looking at me and silently judging me. I’m not going to lie I felt defeated before I even started. It took a lot of courage to go back there. But, I just ignored people and tuned into my headphones. I’ve lost the 40 plus another 5. I think people have gotten used to seeing me now so I don’t notice it as much.
Isn't the point of going to the gym to work out and exercise and get in shape? I wasn't aware you had to already be in shape before going. [/sarcasm] Mad props to the woman who got those three tossers banned and showed support to the woman they were laughing at.
I cannot stand to see injustices like this, it hurts my own heart to know anyone suffers mental abuse, I'm glad someone stood up and helped this lady. This could've been one of the worst days of her life, but now she can remember the day she met a good friend instead of three idiots.
Sometimes, you come across people who are just not knowledegable about the things they do. You don't need to make fun of them or berate them. We have all been in the very same position of not knowing something, and looking lite prats. Sometimes, we got away with.. The difference is if you are a non-condescending helping hand or a a-hole about it... If your are the former, you just go - hey! You need a hand? Let me show you how-to, to get the best out of it, a few tricks, and off you go - watch me!, show, wish good luck, and walk off as if it never happened and leave them all the wiser... They may be a bit embarrassed still about them not figuring it out or not knowing, but they won't feel like you told them off, exposed or berated.. They will come up and thank you for showing them the way, eventually.
It's amazing how insecure you can feel. I have used gyms before but always with my other half (who is much fitter and more 'at home' in that environment). This year I decided to sign up to a gym but he didn't because he plays a lot of sport already. I'm lucky, I'm an average size and average fitness so I can put my headphones in and present I know what I'm doing, I don't look like a complete beginner, but I feel like one, especially walking in on my own for the first time, and having to work out where to go and what to do on. And I couldn't work out how to make one of the machines work, and I could not work out how to turn one of the machines on, I felt like such an idiot. I'm so grateful to the gentleman who quietly gestured me over and (not breaking stride on the treadmill) explaining to me what I did wrong.
My grandson came home from work , grim and resentful. Eventually, it came out that a couple of the other guys at work had picked up on something he did and were ridiculing him. He got mad and tried to strike back. It only added fuel. I asked him why he was so close to people like like that. He looked puzzled and denied it. I asked if they were only people he knew and had nothing to do with his life, REALLY, why should he care . He eventually got the point. Nothing frustrates a bully more than being minimized. A look of sympathy and " You REALLY can't find anything better to do? " is hard to deny. The world is full of IRRELEVANT people. Think TOUGH!!!
I get a bit choked-up whenever I see someone at the gym who is very overweight, simply because I know how much courage it must take for them to be there. Whenever I get the chance, I'll give them a smile and a nod, sort of a silent; "Good for you! Hang in there!"
Twelve years ago when I was 48 I was a civilian in Defence. We had regular Health Days and I was put on scales which informed me and the Physical Instructor that I had the body of a 50 year old. After me two army guys aged in their 30s stood on the same scales and came up with a body age of 22 ARGH! I know their job is to be fighting fit - and cute but really mind blowing the real age vs the internal age. Right then and there I vowed to work out at the free gym and pool (Thank you Defence). within 2 years I was running Rain and shine for 45 mins running three power poles and walking 2 power poles. I was swimming 30 mins and getting in 30 mins plus in the gym - weights, beat test, pounding the punching bag when I was furious at life. On my 50th birthday I stood on the scales and they said my internal age was 50. On my 51st birthday I stood on the scales and my internal age was 50. I HAD DONE IT.
The last time I went to the gym, I worked hard for about 3 hours. My last activity was to swim and then go to the sauna. I'm a big guy. When I got into the hot tub, I sat away from folks and adjusted my body so that the jets would hit my shoulder just right. When I found the right spot, I relaxed. That's when I heard one particular man talking about how shameful it is for someone to be overweight, that it indicated that all they do is eat sugary cereal and candy and desserts with impunity. The person he was taking to tried to change the subject, but the man got louder and manner in his comments. He was looking directly at me as he spoke his vileness. I'm pretty tough-skinned, but I have terrible body image issues. It totally ruined my excellent workout and great confidence. I've never gone back to that gym and never will.
I've found that most staffers at large gyms don't care if people who join during the NY rush continue attending. I'm sure a vast number of people make monthly payments to a gym they don't attend. Asswads at the gym are nothing new. I've had people stand by a piece of equipment while I was using it, making their impatience known. I just smile and say, "I'm going to be a while." Most often they'd act as if I was in their way -- eyeroll, etc. I partly fault gyms that don't offer at lest one guided workout, so people learn things like wiping down equipment after you've used it or removing weights and putting them away or how to adjust and use equipment for best results. When I lived in downtown Denver (before the BOOM), I lived a block from the 20th St. Gym, a city-run community center. There were signs by every piece of equipment on how to use it, and the information was good. They also had a check-in system that reported online, so you knew if there were 10 people in the gym or 80.
Glad those people were banned and that person stepped up. My peeve at the gym is when people are there and not working out at all. Just standing or sitting around talking. I judge those people hard because a gym is there for fitness and working out, NOT a social club!
Welp, it was something that I posted on my FB sometime back: It was when I was made fun of by a guy when I was on the treadmill. Was ready to walk out when I overheard his friend reminding him what HE looked like before he came to the gym. And of course, I stayed.
I know this is beside the point, and while I am very grateful that this woman had an angel in disguise there to help her, I still feel the need to point out something that hasn't been made apparent to most people. Growing up, most of us are taught that "You don't make fun of fat people!". While, yes this is true, it really puts a narrow spectrum on the matter. What we should be teaching is that you shouldn't make fun, judge, or criticize anybody. No matter what their size, shape, weight, or anything else is. People don't realize that it's just as hurtful for people, like myself, who struggle to gain weight to be made fun of, judged while at the gym, or called derogatory names like "toothpick", "scrawny", or "twig". There are also just as many health complications, in some cases, with being underweight as there are with being overweight. Having experienced this, I can totally relate with this amazing lady...only difference is that I didn't have an angel to help me, and I never went back.
I really wonder sometimes what was going through their minds. You can murder people by your words and actions. You can also save them. You saved this woman by helping her on her journey. God bless you.
I'd say these people are monsters, but that implies some kind of power or status- the people making fun of her are acting like garbage. Half of america is obese, last I heard, no one should be doing anything to discourage anyone from the gym. I used to be quite slender but of course as I aged it was harder to remain that way. I'm sure glad I never made fun of anyone for that because it can just happen to you.
I'm old and fat but very strong. People don't usually smirk at me after they've seen me push more weight than them, especially on the leg press machine. Sad to say, it's mainly been other women who've been snotty to me, especially young ones.
I have General Anxiety and I was so scared to go to the gym that I made my own gym in my basement. (Just a weightlifting rack, but many days of hard effort to put down the 3 layers of plywood and horse rubber in a large enough area under and around it). Through that I have lost enough fat (not weight, because have gained some muscle which weighs more) and gained enough confidence that I can go to the rock climbing gym which is my new favourite thing and I wish I'd discovered it a decade ago. Anyway my point is gyms are scary places already, don't be an asshat.
I am not sporty. At all. But I do quite like it and I figured two years ago I’d try a local gym, just to get some movement, feel a bit better. My husband sniggered at my idea and I didn’t go. He says now he meant no harm and I surely realise how silly it sounded but it was hurtful to me and it really put me off.
There are gyms that cater only to women. Let us know what your husband things when you're looking amazing.
Load More Replies... I like seeing new people at the gym. The sad part is when you stop seeing someone new who had been sticking with it for a few weeks.
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I never realized people were like at the gym. Thanks for posting this and creating the awareness. I always feel that small sense judgement walking into a new to a gym, but I've never witnessed it actually happen. I know her having to go though that really sucked. We definitely need people like the lady who stepped in. I'll definitely keep my open to this, just rude. Here's a great way I found to lose weight at home https://tinyurl.com/yxbypks4 , I hope this helps some others. Thank you for the article.
Good for that man or woman who helped out the newbie! (But for the love of all things, please stop saying "journey" and, for that matter, "my truth".)
That’s I haven’t went back to the gym, I’ve been paying for about a year, my experience was like awful because many of the machines were already taken and those members using them look at me like “it’s mine dont you dare to use it”
this is the reason I don't go to the gym. I really want to work out, but I am to afraid to show up. I feel disguised, as if only thin people are allowed to go to the gym. I know this is not true, but I still struggle with those thoughts xxx
Thank you for being the kind and beautiful person you are and standing up for her. Always stand up for what you believe in even if it means standing alone. Your story brought tears to my eyes. Who knows as depressed as she may have been after losing her parents she may have well left and committed suicide after such humiliation and cruelty. You are a true hero. Thank you for reaching out to her!
And this is why I refuse to go to the gym. Being fitter than me or someone else doesn't give you an a*****e pass.
Well done!!! You said and did to her exactly what I would have done. Although having the wherewithal to report the creeps to management would not have occurred to me. I absolutely LOVE that they were kicked out for that!!! Kudos to the manager of that gym! Great story! Great ending! Great beginning for the girl!!! Love it!!! <3
There should be a gym that only allows fat people. Buff hot people can't join, there are lots of other gyms for them. And if you lose the weight and get Buff, you get the honour of being kicked out of the Plus-Size Gym. An achievement, not a rejection.
Humans csn be absolutely terrible but....... Humans can always be incredible. Glad they reported the geoup vs just pretend its not happening
I tried a gym many years ago, a ladies only class, and true to form, myself and two older ladies were in the back row, obviously all overweight and out of puff. The rest of the class & of course, the trainer was slim and fit. Suddenly, as our time ran out, the door to the room opened and in came the next class - the men's class. Didn't they have a lovely time sniggering at the back row - in fact, they barely noticed the rest of the ladies who were showing off for them, posing and kicking their legs in the air. I never went back and I would wager that the other two ladies didn't either.
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Teaching moments are taught/ learned when there is a consequence to the wrong doing. I'm having trouble seeing how the gym could have given these three adults a consequence to their actions that would change their behavior. Termination of membership might be eye opening enough for them to be better at the next gym they sign up with, maybe if they get booted from enough places they might do some self reflection, I don't know. Anywho, that's my two cents on why the gym banned the bullies.
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Bullying someone for their weight, especially when they're actively trying to get healthier, is always bad, Tyler.
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In endurance sports we have the following saying: "You do not need to be embarassed if you finish last. You only need to be embarassed if you did not even try." People making fun of those who try for good merely publicly display their own fragility and insecurity. In other words: we should cheer the loudest for those crossing the finish line last and possibly not having an atheltic figure. The reason for the latter can be manifold and what counts is that they want to make a difference.
Body shaming is ALWAYS bad. But body shaming in a sports place is the absolute worst! People come here to do something about themselves, and it's the only place and way to do it, and a selfish a*****e dares body shame that person right there? You could LITERALLY kill somebody like that, I'm not even exaggerating. And then they will criticize how "fat people" are too lazy to work out. Body shaming in a sports place happened to me too a couple of times. It made me wanna slap their faces until my hands got numb while crying the Niagara and shouting ethical questions at their c**p-faces. I just wished them hemorrhoids instead.
"And then they will criticize how "fat people" are too lazy to work out." This is what kills me. You can't b***h that people won't do something, then b***h when they do. (okay, clearly you can because so many people do it)
Load More Replies... I think that those gym egocentric posers who make fun of people trying to do something good with their health are nothing but obscene degenerates and no matter how much they work out, they will never be sexy in any shape or form.
I think most of them do it because they feel that the only way they can be superior or better than someone else is to put others down around them. I laugh at those people because I know that, due to their behavior, most of their relationships are fake and wouldn't be able to stand up to the slightest of problems. They have no true friends but only lackies that would gladly leave them in a heart beat when the next alpha comes along.
Load More Replies... There are so many videos on youtube with people doing things incorrectly. It is immature. It puts me off gyms and takes away humanity, help instead of laugh, mean girls is a movie, not a lifestyle.
"Mean girls is a movie, not a lifestyle." HAHAHA! That statement ROCKS!
Load More Replies... What kind of people try to embarrass someone trying to better themselves? Absolutely disgusting behaviour, I am glad the bullies got banned.
You may have heard: bullies hurt people in order to feel like they have power. Similarly, people are often judgemental to others in order to feel like they are morally superior. Also, bullies were often bullied in their past, or otherwise hurt. So the people trying to embarrass others who are trying to improve, are those who feel weak or insecure. I wonder if, in gyms, it has to do with people not being happy with their bodies, and taking it out on others.
Load More Replies... I'm glad the people who made fun of her got punished and that the guy helped her. At that moment he was like an angel for her.
I may have missed it, but I thought it was another lady that helped her? Reason I mention this is that I was under the assumption that men weren't allowed in the women's locker room. O.o
Load More Replies... I remember the model bodyshaming an elderly woman in the locker room. :( At my gym no phones/cameras are allowed during training. And in my experience most people at gyms are like the nice poster. Helpful, not judging, encouraging. I remember that I thought there would be a lot of bodybuilders just posing and model-like girls laughing about middle aged couch potatoes (me)...was so wrong! The hard working muscled men helped me with doing the kettle bell better, the feather-like 20ish girls helped me turning the treadmill on..and so on and so on. The only one with a judgemental mind was me before I got to know the members. (Yeah, it was out of fear but that doesn't make it better).
That model had charges pressed against her for that. Now I wonder what was her penalty.
Load More Replies... Good for her. I saw the same thing happen at my little community gym, and told the guys they were being rude and that instead of making fun of the woman they should offer support and encouragement. Or just keep their mouths shut, because I'd be going to management next, who do not tolerate that type of behavior.
Making fun of an overweight person at the gym is like making fun of a homeless person at a job fair. Both are trying to better themselves. Don't be that a*****e
The gym is literally the worst place to body shame someone.....what the hell they're clearly there because they want to make a healthy change. Help them!
I am a competitive bodybuilder and power lifter. Rude and childish behavior like this should never be tolerated and I am glad to know that the gym staff banned these inconsiderate fools. Personally, I get inspired and motivated when I see someone who obviously has a ways to go, grinding it out. These folks need to be given positive motivation to keep smashing it and the given the confidence to know that they WILL achieve their fitness goals! Do NOT let this unfortunate incident prevent any of you out there from going after it!
Bullying is NEVER acceptable. Thank God OP stood up to the bullies and got them banned. As everyone else has said here... bullies do so because they feel inadequate in their souls. Standing up to bullies ROCKETH!
I always remember reading a story on Drew Manning. He's a fitness trainer that used to think that overweight people used their extra weight as an excuse to be lazy and flake out on their workouts. He finally tried to prove to them that they were just whining by gaining 70lbs with the intention of losing it all again. Only it wasn't as easy as he thought it was going to be. The extra weight brought on depression and pain. His motivation was gone. He struggled like crazy to lose the weight and get back in shape. Now he has more respect for his overweight clients because he knows their journey is an every day struggle to stay motivated. And for those looking for a gym to work out in that does not tolerate the kind of behavior these three idiots displayed, go to the YMCA. They will not only guide you, but set you up on a routine that will work for you.
This sounds very interesting- and I like that he sounds empathic. But of course he was a super fit guy who just gained weight, no comparison with obese people who might never really have been fit, suffering from consequences (poor health) for being overweight for a long time and so on and so on. But really good for him that he tried to understand. (It also reminds me of starting running again- I was a good runner, and getting back in form meant to me, I KNEW how good it would feel, how muscles would adapt, how much fun I would have. A friend of mine really struggled because to her it was a lot of work and she did not know how good it would feel..she read about it but that is not the same. I also felt line my body remembered ...for her everything was new. So her work was much harder and a far greater achievement.)
Load More Replies... If only super fit people went to the gym.... there would be no fit people. That's the point of going to the gym. To become fit and then stay fit.
It’s also usually those people filming and taking the p**s who have terrible technique and are covering for their own insecurities by mocking others. As a trainer that behaviour sickens me and I actively encourage people to point it out to staff so that action can be taken
In all the years I've been going to gyms, I've never witnessed that kind of behavior. People are always supportive of each other and most of us look to those who are starting out with a little bit of hero worship. When I do a triathlon and see an overweight person participating, I think about how much harder and more effort it takes for them and I'm always proud of them. The folks who were laughing have some deep self esteem issues.
I've seen some real jerks at various gyms. It doesn't happen often, but when it does, it's ugly. The LA Fitness I go do recently banned two women and one man for verbally abusing a young man who was losing weight. ....///... No gym can afford to get a reputation for tolerating bad behaviour.
Load More Replies... I always wanted to lose my weight anf go to the gym. But, people around me always tease me badly about my plan. They keep on laughing and started to tell everyone about that . Even my family think it was funny. I always get body shaming by people around me ,even my family will do that. That make me really uncomfortable for who I am. All the situation I faced regarding with my look and size always make my self-confidence drop. I want to change. It wasn't because I want to look great like all the girl with bodygoal,but I'm so tired for always failed in my daily activities so are my job interview. That's why I always depressed sometimes.
It sounds like your family are the problem(You mentioned them twice), you could keep it secret from them, I don't know your living arrangement but if you live in a large city then you could join the gym and not tell them, you know they're going to ridicule you so set a body target that you absolutely will not share with anyone around you until you reach it and also join a weight watching group, for the morale support that you know your family and friends are in no way going to give you. You cannot always change the way your family are going to act so don't use up energy in trying just focus on your goal.
Load More Replies... I know exactly how she feels. I weighed 273 and now weigh 185. It took two years but I did it. I’m 6 feet tall so I was huge! It always makes me smile when I see someone put themselves out there who needs to shed some pounds. I always think Go Get ‘Em Girl! I know what bravery it takes to get started ...
I started going to a well-known chain gum, but it was in a very small town. Over the course of 10 months I lost a hundred pounds with diet and exercise. The guys at the gym were so supportive and encouraged me all the time. It really made a difference.
This goes to show that body shaming isn’t even about health as all the trolls like say. An overweight person trying to work out should be lauded by body shamers, not locked then. These a******s are just about controlling people, no one who fat shames gives a c**p about people’s health.
Why the downvotes? People don't even read the comment, they glance at a few words and do the deed. Geez
Load More Replies... This makes no sense. They'll mock you for being fat and tell you to eat a vegetable and exercise but then when you try to exercise they mock you and make fun of you??? It's just a no win situation! What a******s.
I've been there myself. Too embarrassed to even join a gym - so I took up biking, thinking I'd be safe from this type of judgement. I was wrong. The people at the bike store were clearly ... amused
They sound like jerks. I hope you bought your bike from a different store.
Load More Replies... I think that is why so many people lose hope; because someone is messing with them mentally; dude- people already have demons in their own head, and it took a LOT for someone to even walk in the gym!
Beauty is always inside. That´s what makes ppl look beautiful on the outside. This guy was absolutely human and kind and I really hope this lady gets healthier and finds peace for her lost.
I was always super self conscious at gyms until I joined my current gym and decided to fork out the extra money for a personal trainer. He’s in really good shape but he’s always very patient and sweet and never makes me feel awkward even when I totally fell off one of those step things trying to come back from a lunge after a particularly leg intensive workout. I was embarrassed but he was just worried about me being hurt. I work in a hospital and after seeing one too many 40 something year old come in in full cardiac arrest I decided I better get my stuff together and take care of myself. I’m terrified of ever needing cpr or heart surgery done on me. Gyms are there to help people get in shape, not as a hangout place for people to just stand around and bully others. They obviously weren’t focused on their own workouts if they had time to video other members. I’m glad the manager did the right thing.
Yes, thanks to the hero, I am stunned that the rude people are adults, that is a thousand times worse. Those adults should think, "But for the grace of God, go I" many people are born with issues, with little or no control !!!
I agree with all of the comments, this is despicable, cowardly and shallow behaviour. People like these morons is the reason many people are fearful of the gym. I imagine the people laughing are vastly uninteresting people, all they probably talk about is what they lift, what they run, what they eat blah blah blah constantly.
Man, why don't people just mind their own business if they have nothing good to add...
Fit people can make the gym an intimidating hell. It's like going back to high school with the cliques they form and who's in and who's out.
This is why I do not go to the gym. I do workout, mostly at home. I have asked for help from several different people. Even tried to hire a personal trainer and yet nobody seems to want to help me. I have no idea what I am doing when I am at the gym and only have ever asked for guidance, yet to be meet with silence from people. I have been at a plateau for months now, however, I still work out daily and hoping that I see some improvements. People like this are all over the place and this is why people who are heavy or do not know how to use the equipment to get results, do not go. Thank you to this person who helped her continue on her journey.
I stopped going to the gym years ago. I've gained 80lbs since I stopped. >.< I stopped because I was told members have access after 9:30PM and I worked 9AM-9PM and going to the gym after work just worked better for me. So I showed up at 9:20PM, ready to workout, and the lady who was on shift that night looked at me like I'd grown a second head. Her husband was there. He started verbally berating me. I explained that I had been told members have access after hours. He pointed at the door where the sign said 5AM to 9:30PM and called me a f*****g idiot. I packed my things, walked out and never went back. It was humiliating. I tried working out at home for awhile but I lost all motivation and next thing I knew I had swelled in weight. *sigh* I want to go back but don't think I'll be able to without someone to go with. I just lack the courage and am worried about being yelled at or berated again if I misunderstand or get misinformation.
Load More Replies... stuff like this is why i'm so uncomfortable going to the gym. yes i don't seem to be getting better. i have to be in a flawlessly happy state of mind to go because i know when i do people will be mocking my weights or pacing. i'm not fast, i'm heavy, i'm also not trying as much as i'd like to because people are terrifying
Earbuds. Seriously. Find a quiet place in your mind and just do your thing. And look around you. These people are NOT all glamour babes and you'll find that some of them are just like you.
Load More Replies... For everyone complaining about the plus sized superheroes, this is the other side of it.
At my gym I stood on the scales and I was 48 but the scales said I had a 50 year old body. two Army guys then stood on the scales and even though they were in their 30s, the scales put them at mid 20s. I made myself a vow Having access to a free gym and pool and a beautiful running trail beside the river, I set myself targets. On my 50th birthday I stood on the scales - they said my internal age was 50. On my 51st birthday I stood on the scales - my internal age was 50, on my 52 birthday I stood on the scales, my internal age was 49. I had done it. Unfortunately I was retrenched not too long after this, I did undo some of the good work, but this year, I have lost 20kilograms and my dog and I are looking the better for it. And I still wear skummy clothes when I walk the dog - I have a dog to protect me - who do I want to impress? no-one but me.
I used to wear really skummy clothes to the gym - after all I was there to work out not to make out - The turning point for me was when two Special Forces guys who had been coming to the Defence Gym on an off whenever they were back from wherever they went to - well they said to me "Wow you are looking good - keep up the hard work" There I was, good sneakers mismatched socks, paint spattered shorts, half leggings, t-shirt hand-me-up from my brother, all sweat stained. One of the proudest moments in my life.
if someone looks like they're having a tough time I tell them they're starting the day right by going to the gym or that they did great on whatever machine they're on. so many of us are self conscious it helps if we have someone who's looking at us say something positive. Then we don't have that anxiety of "what an I doing here?" or " not good enough for them" We all know people look at us.Make it positive.
I hope this woman continues to take care of herself and continues to go to the gym. Never let people who are ugly on the inside impact your life. Ignore them. Avoid them. Fate/Karma will take care of them. To the person that put themselves out there to be a friend to this woman, thank you for that. Your kindness changed someones life, for the better.
The bullies not only lost their gym, they lost the chance to help a fellow human being and that is sadder.
I have a nephew who loves the gym. He is the kind of person like the author, he wants everyone to enjoy themselves and offers encouragement to other folks at the gym.
be proud of yourself and f@ck the one who bullies you, they just show their very low IQ and EQ
A few years back I lost 130lbs. Up until that time (after having 8 children) I had pretty much given up trying to lose; every time I lost 30lbs I would get pregnant again lol. So I went for nearly 20 years being overweight. My late husband, bless his heart, never said one negative thing to me about it..."lose if you want to, or not" he would say. "Do it for YOU." Anyway, I finally did it. But it taught me a very valuable lesson in "the doing" of it, which I will never forget. NEVER JUDGE. You don't know what that other person has gone through in his/her life to end up overweight. It could be emotional eating (due to depression, grief, w/e); it could be hormonal; it could be hereditary; it could be any number of things. And when I see an overweight person on the street I remind myself, "Maybe he had broiled chicken and a salad for lunch." "Maybe she has already lost 10lbs!" "Maybe maybe maybe...." It is not my place to say...so I don't. I just say a prayer for them...
There's a wonderful marketing opportunity for that gym (and all other gyms) to use overweight and out of shape people in their ads. Especially using something like the #1 upvoted comment from Hans: "You do not need to be embarassed if you finish last. You only need to be embarrassed if you did not even try."
My gym has a strict no video recording or photo policy and that makes me extremely happy because I know I’m not being filmed to be the next bullied viral target online I wish more gyms had this policy.
This is the reason I do not go to the gym. I've seen acquaintances post stuff to their Snapchat or IG making fun of others. It is so childish especially when they're the health nuts telling others to get fit.
I saw a very overweight woman at the gym yesterday and I teared up, thinking what courage it takes to go to the gym, with tons of really fit people and tackle such an overwhelming endeavor of getting in shape. I was so moved by her courage! She's was my hero of the day!
I’ve always hated going to the gym. Especially being in college and my only free time is when it’s the most packed with meatheads. My advice to anyone would be to not care and if that’s a little too hard at first that’s fine, go late at night or early morning, I’ve noticed that seems to be when the real guinely nice lifters go. They don’t judge but they might just give you some pointers because they remember how awful their squats, deadlifts, etc looked when they started.
Unfortunately this isn't a single occurrence as it happened to me too. I haven't been to a gym again. It just annoys me because people are so critical of those who are overweight and obese even though they know nothing about them. I just wish people could stop thinking they have a right to judge and comment on others lives and look after their own.
I am 53 years old, work out daily, cardio etc. in order to stay fit, be and feel healthy & to be able to sleep at night. People like these aholes p**s me off when I hear and see this type of b******t happen. But instead of confronting the aholes first I go to the person they are belittling and offer encouragement. It just so happens that in doing so I tell him, or her, what my opinion of people who mess with others who are trying to improve thselves is. It is sickening that this middle and high school behavior continues on into people's adult lives. I've only had one time when the bullies would not leave the poor guy alone until they were told to leave the gym and not come back. Life is difficult enough without aholes trying to make themselves feel better by picking on others.
So sad to treat people like that. It only goes to show that age does not equal wisdom. Thank you for being kind to that woman. You were her hero.👍
Bright blessings on that nice stranger for helping that woman - and poxes on the slimewads that body-shamed her!
Side note: This is an extension of fat shaming. The kind that everyone claims is for someone else's own good, and not just them being a ick. Making fun of someone is never ever helping them. Telling them they're fat, doing food or exercise wrong in a mean spirited manner is never ok. Telling people they're fat and un healthy (like they don't realize it) is not helpful, it is harmful and just people being massive jerks.
Load More Replies... I'll say it again: mind your own damn business people and everyone will be happier. It's none of your business if someone is obese and works out. Look at yourself and focus on yourself and let other live.
The very fact that she showed up at the gym shows that she really was trying to better herself. No-one deserves to be bullied whatever size or shape.
These bullies can't have it both ways, so the best thing for them to do would be to just STFU.
JonSnow1982: You ROCK. GD Bless you !! I find it very sobering and heartwarming that there are people like you in this world. That. Is. All.
I was a pretty healthy kid growing up. Never fat but never really skinny or muscular. After a battle with severe depression and anxiety, I had gained 40lbs. When I went to the gym I could sense people looking at me and silently judging me. I’m not going to lie I felt defeated before I even started. It took a lot of courage to go back there. But, I just ignored people and tuned into my headphones. I’ve lost the 40 plus another 5. I think people have gotten used to seeing me now so I don’t notice it as much.
Isn't the point of going to the gym to work out and exercise and get in shape? I wasn't aware you had to already be in shape before going. [/sarcasm] Mad props to the woman who got those three tossers banned and showed support to the woman they were laughing at.
I cannot stand to see injustices like this, it hurts my own heart to know anyone suffers mental abuse, I'm glad someone stood up and helped this lady. This could've been one of the worst days of her life, but now she can remember the day she met a good friend instead of three idiots.
Sometimes, you come across people who are just not knowledegable about the things they do. You don't need to make fun of them or berate them. We have all been in the very same position of not knowing something, and looking lite prats. Sometimes, we got away with.. The difference is if you are a non-condescending helping hand or a a-hole about it... If your are the former, you just go - hey! You need a hand? Let me show you how-to, to get the best out of it, a few tricks, and off you go - watch me!, show, wish good luck, and walk off as if it never happened and leave them all the wiser... They may be a bit embarrassed still about them not figuring it out or not knowing, but they won't feel like you told them off, exposed or berated.. They will come up and thank you for showing them the way, eventually.
It's amazing how insecure you can feel. I have used gyms before but always with my other half (who is much fitter and more 'at home' in that environment). This year I decided to sign up to a gym but he didn't because he plays a lot of sport already. I'm lucky, I'm an average size and average fitness so I can put my headphones in and present I know what I'm doing, I don't look like a complete beginner, but I feel like one, especially walking in on my own for the first time, and having to work out where to go and what to do on. And I couldn't work out how to make one of the machines work, and I could not work out how to turn one of the machines on, I felt like such an idiot. I'm so grateful to the gentleman who quietly gestured me over and (not breaking stride on the treadmill) explaining to me what I did wrong.
My grandson came home from work , grim and resentful. Eventually, it came out that a couple of the other guys at work had picked up on something he did and were ridiculing him. He got mad and tried to strike back. It only added fuel. I asked him why he was so close to people like like that. He looked puzzled and denied it. I asked if they were only people he knew and had nothing to do with his life, REALLY, why should he care . He eventually got the point. Nothing frustrates a bully more than being minimized. A look of sympathy and " You REALLY can't find anything better to do? " is hard to deny. The world is full of IRRELEVANT people. Think TOUGH!!!
I get a bit choked-up whenever I see someone at the gym who is very overweight, simply because I know how much courage it must take for them to be there. Whenever I get the chance, I'll give them a smile and a nod, sort of a silent; "Good for you! Hang in there!"
Twelve years ago when I was 48 I was a civilian in Defence. We had regular Health Days and I was put on scales which informed me and the Physical Instructor that I had the body of a 50 year old. After me two army guys aged in their 30s stood on the same scales and came up with a body age of 22 ARGH! I know their job is to be fighting fit - and cute but really mind blowing the real age vs the internal age. Right then and there I vowed to work out at the free gym and pool (Thank you Defence). within 2 years I was running Rain and shine for 45 mins running three power poles and walking 2 power poles. I was swimming 30 mins and getting in 30 mins plus in the gym - weights, beat test, pounding the punching bag when I was furious at life. On my 50th birthday I stood on the scales and they said my internal age was 50. On my 51st birthday I stood on the scales and my internal age was 50. I HAD DONE IT.
The last time I went to the gym, I worked hard for about 3 hours. My last activity was to swim and then go to the sauna. I'm a big guy. When I got into the hot tub, I sat away from folks and adjusted my body so that the jets would hit my shoulder just right. When I found the right spot, I relaxed. That's when I heard one particular man talking about how shameful it is for someone to be overweight, that it indicated that all they do is eat sugary cereal and candy and desserts with impunity. The person he was taking to tried to change the subject, but the man got louder and manner in his comments. He was looking directly at me as he spoke his vileness. I'm pretty tough-skinned, but I have terrible body image issues. It totally ruined my excellent workout and great confidence. I've never gone back to that gym and never will.
I've found that most staffers at large gyms don't care if people who join during the NY rush continue attending. I'm sure a vast number of people make monthly payments to a gym they don't attend. Asswads at the gym are nothing new. I've had people stand by a piece of equipment while I was using it, making their impatience known. I just smile and say, "I'm going to be a while." Most often they'd act as if I was in their way -- eyeroll, etc. I partly fault gyms that don't offer at lest one guided workout, so people learn things like wiping down equipment after you've used it or removing weights and putting them away or how to adjust and use equipment for best results. When I lived in downtown Denver (before the BOOM), I lived a block from the 20th St. Gym, a city-run community center. There were signs by every piece of equipment on how to use it, and the information was good. They also had a check-in system that reported online, so you knew if there were 10 people in the gym or 80.
Glad those people were banned and that person stepped up. My peeve at the gym is when people are there and not working out at all. Just standing or sitting around talking. I judge those people hard because a gym is there for fitness and working out, NOT a social club!
Welp, it was something that I posted on my FB sometime back: It was when I was made fun of by a guy when I was on the treadmill. Was ready to walk out when I overheard his friend reminding him what HE looked like before he came to the gym. And of course, I stayed.
I know this is beside the point, and while I am very grateful that this woman had an angel in disguise there to help her, I still feel the need to point out something that hasn't been made apparent to most people. Growing up, most of us are taught that "You don't make fun of fat people!". While, yes this is true, it really puts a narrow spectrum on the matter. What we should be teaching is that you shouldn't make fun, judge, or criticize anybody. No matter what their size, shape, weight, or anything else is. People don't realize that it's just as hurtful for people, like myself, who struggle to gain weight to be made fun of, judged while at the gym, or called derogatory names like "toothpick", "scrawny", or "twig". There are also just as many health complications, in some cases, with being underweight as there are with being overweight. Having experienced this, I can totally relate with this amazing lady...only difference is that I didn't have an angel to help me, and I never went back.
I really wonder sometimes what was going through their minds. You can murder people by your words and actions. You can also save them. You saved this woman by helping her on her journey. God bless you.
I'd say these people are monsters, but that implies some kind of power or status- the people making fun of her are acting like garbage. Half of america is obese, last I heard, no one should be doing anything to discourage anyone from the gym. I used to be quite slender but of course as I aged it was harder to remain that way. I'm sure glad I never made fun of anyone for that because it can just happen to you.
I'm old and fat but very strong. People don't usually smirk at me after they've seen me push more weight than them, especially on the leg press machine. Sad to say, it's mainly been other women who've been snotty to me, especially young ones.
I have General Anxiety and I was so scared to go to the gym that I made my own gym in my basement. (Just a weightlifting rack, but many days of hard effort to put down the 3 layers of plywood and horse rubber in a large enough area under and around it). Through that I have lost enough fat (not weight, because have gained some muscle which weighs more) and gained enough confidence that I can go to the rock climbing gym which is my new favourite thing and I wish I'd discovered it a decade ago. Anyway my point is gyms are scary places already, don't be an asshat.
I am not sporty. At all. But I do quite like it and I figured two years ago I’d try a local gym, just to get some movement, feel a bit better. My husband sniggered at my idea and I didn’t go. He says now he meant no harm and I surely realise how silly it sounded but it was hurtful to me and it really put me off.
There are gyms that cater only to women. Let us know what your husband things when you're looking amazing.
Load More Replies... I like seeing new people at the gym. The sad part is when you stop seeing someone new who had been sticking with it for a few weeks.
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I never realized people were like at the gym. Thanks for posting this and creating the awareness. I always feel that small sense judgement walking into a new to a gym, but I've never witnessed it actually happen. I know her having to go though that really sucked. We definitely need people like the lady who stepped in. I'll definitely keep my open to this, just rude. Here's a great way I found to lose weight at home https://tinyurl.com/yxbypks4 , I hope this helps some others. Thank you for the article.
Good for that man or woman who helped out the newbie! (But for the love of all things, please stop saying "journey" and, for that matter, "my truth".)
That’s I haven’t went back to the gym, I’ve been paying for about a year, my experience was like awful because many of the machines were already taken and those members using them look at me like “it’s mine dont you dare to use it”
this is the reason I don't go to the gym. I really want to work out, but I am to afraid to show up. I feel disguised, as if only thin people are allowed to go to the gym. I know this is not true, but I still struggle with those thoughts xxx
Thank you for being the kind and beautiful person you are and standing up for her. Always stand up for what you believe in even if it means standing alone. Your story brought tears to my eyes. Who knows as depressed as she may have been after losing her parents she may have well left and committed suicide after such humiliation and cruelty. You are a true hero. Thank you for reaching out to her!
And this is why I refuse to go to the gym. Being fitter than me or someone else doesn't give you an a*****e pass.
Well done!!! You said and did to her exactly what I would have done. Although having the wherewithal to report the creeps to management would not have occurred to me. I absolutely LOVE that they were kicked out for that!!! Kudos to the manager of that gym! Great story! Great ending! Great beginning for the girl!!! Love it!!! <3
There should be a gym that only allows fat people. Buff hot people can't join, there are lots of other gyms for them. And if you lose the weight and get Buff, you get the honour of being kicked out of the Plus-Size Gym. An achievement, not a rejection.
Humans csn be absolutely terrible but....... Humans can always be incredible. Glad they reported the geoup vs just pretend its not happening
I tried a gym many years ago, a ladies only class, and true to form, myself and two older ladies were in the back row, obviously all overweight and out of puff. The rest of the class & of course, the trainer was slim and fit. Suddenly, as our time ran out, the door to the room opened and in came the next class - the men's class. Didn't they have a lovely time sniggering at the back row - in fact, they barely noticed the rest of the ladies who were showing off for them, posing and kicking their legs in the air. I never went back and I would wager that the other two ladies didn't either.
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Teaching moments are taught/ learned when there is a consequence to the wrong doing. I'm having trouble seeing how the gym could have given these three adults a consequence to their actions that would change their behavior. Termination of membership might be eye opening enough for them to be better at the next gym they sign up with, maybe if they get booted from enough places they might do some self reflection, I don't know. Anywho, that's my two cents on why the gym banned the bullies.
Load More Replies... Bullying someone for their weight, especially when they're actively trying to get healthier, is always bad, Tyler.
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