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Woman Asks Mom To Take Her Shrieking Toddler Outside So Everyone Can Enjoy Their Food At A Restaurant, Drama Ensues
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Woman Asks Mom To Take Her Shrieking Toddler Outside So Everyone Can Enjoy Their Food At A Restaurant, Drama Ensues

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Kids can be annoying, especially when they’re loud in places that we do not want them to be. Nico Alary, the co-owner of Holybelly in Paris, France, said restaurants don’t like babies, toddlers, and infants. “Even if the owner is baby-friendly, most [servers] aren’t. They are messy, noisy, sticky, clumsy, disruptive miniature trainwrecks,” he wrote. “If you work in our industry, don’t tell me you don’t … go ‘f***-f***-f***’ in your head when you see a charming couple with a pair of adorable kids pushing the doors of the restaurant you’re working at. I just won’t believe you.”

Alary highlighted that this doesn’t mean the workers despise babies; maybe they’re also parents. “Those are two totally unrelated things. It just means that [they’re] a seasoned professional and that deep down they know that one way or the other s*** is about to hit the fan,” he explained. This is a story about one of those times.

Recently, Redditor u/Wrong_Ad_3951 ran out of patience with a “shrieking” boy while trying to enjoy a meal at a nice restaurant, so she went over to the nearby table to ask his parents to do something about it. However, after hearing the mom’s reaction, she started wondering if she overstepped.

Image credits: Marcos Paulo Prado (not the actual photo)

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Talya Stone, a former editor-in-chief turned parenting blogger and the woman behind Motherhood: The Real Deal and 40 Now What, thinks that every parent knows how mortifying it is having to deal with your child’s tantrum in public. “Personally, my approach is to remove my child (and myself) from the immediate surroundings so I can diffuse the situation without the added pressure of spectators,” Stone told Bored Panda. “The added bonus of removing your child from the situation is that it serves as the best distraction, which is ultimately what you need lots of when handling a public tantrum. This also ensures that you can take your child somewhere safe where they ride out their big emotions without others wading in with their views. This is a good strategy because when researchers looked at the components of tantrums and how long they lasted, they found something of great interest — when parents intervened with a child in a full tantrum, it took longer for the tantrum to finish. You can only imagine what having the public involved might do to the duration of a tantrum!”

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Table manners, on the other hand, start at home. “Model good table manners and dining etiquette, but also don’t expect miracles with young children,” Stone said. “All you can do is put the building blocks in place; age and development play big parts here. Also, try to eat together as a family as much as possible so kids can understand the sort of behavior expected of them at the table. Lastly, I would refrain from parking kids in front of a phone or tablet at the dining table which, although might be a brilliant distraction, ultimately teaches them nothing about how they should behave at the dinner table.”

Talking about this particular case, Stone feels that neither party can get off scot-free. “I think it’s really insensitive of the woman who complained about the child to do so. Everyone was a badly behaved child once and perhaps she had forgotten that! And the last thing a stressed-out parent needs when dealing with a tantrum is a busybody in the mix.”

“Equally, I feel the mum probably should have known when to cut her losses and exit the restaurant temporarily until the child calmed down,” the parenting blogger added. “Although in an ideal world she wouldn’t have been asked to, but would have done so of her own accord (perhaps she wasn’t even given the chance). Having said that, when your children are bringing down the house with their tantrums, it can be seriously tough to think logically, so all in all, I’m on the mom’s side because dealing with a tantrum in public is never easy.”

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Some people thought that OP was being totally reasonable

Etiquette expert Lisa M. Grotts says it’s a good idea to start with at least trying to sympathize with the parents of a screaming child.

“My heart goes out to those who try to curb bad behavior,” she explains.

With that being said, Lisa thinks a lot like Talya Stone and provides these 4 ways for taming problems at the table:

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Practice makes perfect. “When you have dining rules at home, you can reinforce them before you go out, such as reminding children to be on their best behavior in public, to use their church voice, etc.”

Distractions help. “Find anything that will keep kids’ attention when the food won’t, such as books, coloring projects, etc.”

Manage expectations. “Sometimes an unplanned hug may work, but if you’re in a tough spot, be clear, from ‘Stop that,’ to ‘Be nice,’ etc.”

Remove the child from the situation. “Why add insult to injury? If the outburst won’t stop, then you stop it by removing your child from the table.”

At the end of the day, we should all remember that a little bit of empathy can make a huge difference. “Tantrums! [All parents] hate them,” Talya Stone said. “Particularly the ones where everyone’s watching! Standing by while your child puts on a show isn’t much fun. You can feel helpless and incompetent and just want it to end. But the bottom line is that all parents have had to deal with difficult moments and a little understanding from others goes a long way.”

While others believed the situation wasn’t all black and white

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bp_10 avatar
WilvanderHeijden
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The staff of the restaurant should have taken care of the problem. Since they obviously didn't want to do that, the girl was absolutely right to confront the parents. Other guests heard the shrieking child so there's no way that the staff wouldn't have noticed it. But I guess someone told them to ignore the noise because "the customer is always right".

carolyngerbrands avatar
Caro Caro
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You beat me to it Wil. And, why is this a question (NTA). It's normal if a terrible-2's tantrum is taken outside for a time out.

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james_fox1984 avatar
Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA. I have kids myself and they don't just cry or tantrum, they have actual meltdowns. When my kids had those ear piercing screams, I would try everything I could to try and calm the situation. Then I would take them outside and if neither worked, then we left. There of course are exceptions but if no-one is at least trying to calm the child, then they are just inconsiderate assholes.

troux avatar
Troux
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sound very reasonable. Part of having kids is getting used to having your plans ruined and being able to handle it. I hope you never had to experience a childless 23 year old telling you to 'parent better' when your toddlers scream.

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emory_ce avatar
Carol Emory
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This happened in a store. Woman enters with several kids and the youngest girl starts screaming. She wasn't in distress..she just liked the echo of her shrieks through the store. Every time the girl did it, I could hear people's hearing aids whistling as they quickly tried to turn them down. When we approached the mom, she says "Oh..she's just singing..." I said "Let her do it outside. Her 'singing' is setting off hearing aids and making it impossible for people to communicate with each other. Either that or get her to stop." The woman got pissed saying we were stifling her daughter's creativity. I repeated "Let her be creative outside!" The manager finally told her to leave. Apparently he didn't like her "singing" either.

meghanhibicke avatar
Evil Little Thing
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When my son was one he loved the echoing of the grocery store, especially the frozen foods section. For months, every time we would go shopping he would start sing-screaming about his penis. I guess he was really proud of it or something? It was both hilarious and mortifying.

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markfuller avatar
Mark Fuller
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Gratified to see that even parents don't think it's cool to let their screaming shitty brats bawl the house down and ruin life for everyone else. I grew up in an age where it was a goddam privilege be taken into a "place for grown ups" and you most certainly knew to be barely seen and not at all heard. Personally couldn't have that awkward conversation but totally respect those that do. Same as adults providing a running commentary at the theatre - shut the F**K up!!

sweetangelce04 avatar
CatWoman312
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don’t think she did anything wrong. Part of the experience of dining out is the ambiance and if you’re dealing with a screaming child that part, that you paid for, is being slighted. I think parents tend to have a if I have to deal with it everyone has to mentality and I really hate that. No one asked you to have kids and it’s not the world’s problem because you did. If your kids can’t behave in public then maybe they shouldn’t be allowed out. Then again I’m one of those people who go out of the way to consider others and it seems people like myself are rare gems these days.

kathrynbaylis_1 avatar
Kathryn Baylis
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She is most definitely NTA here. Those suggesting she go through the restaurant employees or management are forgetting one thing. Employees won’t do anything to offend a customer, especially if they depend on tips. Management usually won’t do anything but appease and allow bad behavior to continue, because they’re out for money and want no bad word of mouth advertising. So yeah, she had to deal with it herself, as going through the restaurant wouldn’t have given her any satisfaction.

dons avatar
Calypso poet
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not true. I specifically remember a TGIF that had my BF and I seated next to a center table of 6 with 3 kids. Of the approx 4 year olds were wandering and running. The wait staff was trying to dodge them. I asked to be moved or we were leaving. We were moved, got a couple free drinks and noticed the manager came out to speak to the parents. It was obvious why we moved so they gave us dirty looks but we just ignored them.

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anneking68 avatar
StrawberryParfait
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not the asshole. Children can be very disruptive, and a restaurant where people are enjoying their meals is not the place to ignore it. It is perfectly reasonable to request that the child be taken outside, especially since there were two parents at the table. If they weren't willing to do so, then they should have been asked to leave by management. This is a failure on the part of management. Kids will be kids, but there is a time and place for allowances. A restaurant that is not one primarily for children is not one of them.

twostroketerror avatar
Pungent Sauce
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Too young to really remember, but my mom said I was given a choice of sitting and eating with them or having my temper tantrum by myself out in the car (when you could still do things like that’). Seems I went with the car all of once, then decided to eat with them after that. I still have excellent restaurant manners, lol

viviane_katz avatar
Viviane
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

With two parents there, they could have taken turns taking the kid outside. I watched that happen in a restaurant. In that situation, it took two or three trips outside for the child to calm down.

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emmagee avatar
Emma Gee
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you don't want to take your obnoxious child outside but you want everyone to cater to you... then you should be paying for everyone's ruined dinner. Not the asshole. Ever. The staff should have taken care of it. But they weren't.... . So everyone should just endure the bullshit!? No. She had the balls to try to fix the problem. Everyone but her is in the wrong. I don't have kids mostly by choice.... so why should I have to listen to your when I'm paying for a fucken meal at a nice restaurant. Go somewhere kid friendly or be a good person and remove your human rooster.

marneederider40 avatar
Marnie
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Agreed, except even in a "kid-friendly" place, a child should not be left to just shriek for minutes and minutes. Other parents and little kids also don't want to hear that no matter where they are.

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hlmorgan avatar
Big Chungus
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My parents used to do this to us as kids if we acted up. We were taken to the car and we all had to sit there until we stfu. I plan on doing the same with my future child because it did teach me to behave in public. Plus, we were never taken to nicer places until we got a bit older for this same reason.

hotrobot11 avatar
Hotrobot
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA!!! Like 1000% NTA. If this was an adult they would be asked to leave so why should other patrons have their experience ruined by another person? I completely understand that they are a child and are currently in the process of learning how to regulate their emotions, volume and just learning how to exist, but that does not excuses the parenta from dealing with the situation. Furthermore if the kid feels that this is the only way they can be heard it's because it has been reinforced by their parents actions. Kids have such a limited ability to communicate, so they will use what is most effective and using their instinctual logic if your not being heard you scream louder, so this is even more of a reflection on the parents being shitty parents because their child took the nuclear option because they knew no other option was available and it still didn't work.

lorireese avatar
Wheeskers
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There was a woman in a dept store letting her two under 5 kids run and scream and tear s**t up. The hub and I were commenting that our kids would never be allowed to behave that way and we walked out of that area. She confronted me in another aisle about what we said, asking if I did have kids and what she was supposed to do? Her kids needed shoes and they wouldn't cooperate. I told her yes, I did have kids and if they behaved like that we would have left the store and no one got new shoes that day. Oh well. She looked at me like I was nuts. Obviously the children were in charge. Oh, and she did not clean up their mess either.

metallic_geisha avatar
Metallic Geisha
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So glad the tide of thought has changed bc I remember when this would have been YTA across the board. Sincerely, a mom of 4

assistanttodj avatar
Assistant to DJ
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA. Very tired of parents thinking the whole world has to move aside for their spawn. Why is it when people have kids, they start to think they're in their own Truman Show, and the world revolves around their family unit? Does having a kid make you forget there's a whole rest of the planet and it's other 7billion inhabitants who don't give a crap about your inability to use condoms?

b_nut137 avatar
Pheebs
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I… might have told a table of adults that their vacation was going to become a lot less “happiest place on Earth” if they didn’t stop their 5 children from slamming their forks and spoons on every damn thing on the table (plates, glasses, napkin holders…) while singing Baby Shark. And while they’re at it, can they please give the one child that’s getting progressively louder some attention so she’ll stop screaming every random thought in her head in an effort to get a response? It had been a solid 20 minutes of 4 adults pretending they didn’t have kids. I was ready to stab either them or myself with a fork.

carey_ensley_monroe avatar
Carey Cakes
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have 2 kids. I can't tell you how many times I had to eat my food out of a to go box in the car because my kid was acting up in the restaurant and I took him out. Even while traveling, when we had no other option than to eat at a restaurant, if either of them are disruptive, one of us will remove them from the situation. If you stay, you're just setting them up for failure.

ayelet-cooper avatar
alwaysMispelled
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't have my own human offspring but I was a nanny for years. When a child would throw a fit in public, we immediately left. Not only to spare those around us, but so child learns there are consequences.

martingibbs734 avatar
martin734
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Thankfully quite a few of the pubs around here don't allow children under 12 in them and those are the pubs I usually eat at, especially as almost all of them are very dog friendly. There are few things I enjoy less than going out for meal and have parents let their children misbehave in the pub or restaurant. I certainly would not have been able to do it. My parents were very strict and made it clear that if we were going to adult places like pubs and restaurants, then we were to behave like adults. Their attitude was than in places like that children should be seen but not heard. I tend to agree with them. People would be very upset, and rightly so, if I allowed my dogs to run around and bark constantly, so why should it be any different for children.

dons avatar
Calypso poet
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I worked in a bar that unfortunately some people mistook for a place like Applebee's when we weren't busy. But we weren't allowed to turn away under 21 until @5pm because of lunch customers. (Subway style subs and microwave wings! Yum) So we would give "someone" money to play the jukebox. Limp bizkit Hot Dog and and Kid Rock F You Blind usually meant they wouldn't be back. Throw in some Nelly especially Batter Up because they heard The Jefferson's so they started listening! 🤬😂

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jknbt2 avatar
jk nbt
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can top this story... I was stuck on a full plane on a long flight back home on a very late Friday night. Most of the plane was full of exhausted businessmen like me. Sure enough, my luck was to get the seat next to a guy with a one year old kid. My sympathies go out to the child, because he was tired and unhappy too. He screamed like someone was pulling out his fingernails with pliers the entire trip across the continent. There was no place to move since the plane was full. I even took long visits to the bathroom just to get away from the screaming. I have carried earplugs on my flights since then... oh, well...

dons avatar
Calypso poet
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Are you sure that was a one year old and not me? I hate flying and my taxi driver who picked me up at O'hare spoke just enough English to make fun of me for being drunk. No, my eyes were red and swollen from crying all the way to the airport because I never flew by myself and was terrified!

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offkeysinger avatar
OffKeySinger
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA. I remember trying to eat out in my son's first 2 years with a lot of anxiety. I preferred not to eat out in case there was issues, but when I I did, I made sure to have a plan B if my son had a tantrum. I held myself responsible for bad behaviors in public because it affects other people. I was very lucky that my son was very well behaved at that early age, but I still paused to consider contributing factors to an exception when planning on dining out. This period in time actually made me a better cook

nightfalltwen avatar
Kimberley McMillan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA. If your children cannot behave in a sit-down restaurant, then you shouldn't be going anywhere but McDonalds with its play place.

holliemarie1995 avatar
Hollie Marie
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As someone who works in retail the amount of times I'm like will that child shut up but I can't do anything cuz I'll get written up, the same probably goes for the waiters if enough people complained then maybe they could make a case of intervening however they have to consider their jobs. The woman who confronted them had nothing to lose so she was right to say something she wasn't aggressive or angry she just said can you take the child away.

reptilegirl30 avatar
Tacos Are Tasty
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA. The kid was shrieking for 10 minutes and it doesn't seem like the parents made any attempt to quiet the kid. I'd say the OP was more than patient for letting it go on for 10 minutes and these parents are the assholes.

kathmorgan avatar
kath morgan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You choose to have kids. You choose to take them into restaurants that aren't kid-and family targeted. You choose to permit them to shriek and behave badly without any consequence.

dons avatar
Calypso poet
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have no kids and will admit I don't have as much patience as others. But I have also been a server and bar manager. The young lady should have discreetly asked to be moved to another table and if that wasn't an option have a manager speak to the parents. Back in the day of choice of smoking section we chose smoking when it was obvious there were a lot of kids. I cant understand why they haven't taught the hostess to seat people with kids away from a couple who is obviously dressed for dinner.

parmeisan avatar
Parmeisan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Honest question. Many of these commenters are saying it would be less rude to go directly to the manager of the restaurant, but that seems MORE rude to me. It seems passive-aggressive. Am I out of touch? Would most people not prefer to be spoken to directly?

samyobado avatar
Sam Yobado
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think I was there. It was more like a minute of crying after some on an off. It was also pissing rain outside. I was waiting to see if the mom was going to murder this girl who implied she needed to learn how to parent better. The mother did not. The family left, but not early, only after they had finished their meals. From my perspective the girl came off as entitled and the mom came off as tired.

fairydragon avatar
Luka Verheijen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As I live in a noisy neighbourhood, I can handle a lot of noise, but crying kids are just painful, especially for 10 minutes. Yes, parenting is hard abd I was quite tge difficult kid too, but still

francescaannoni avatar
Francesca Annoni
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have two friends with an autistic child.. he hate sounds too loud and we often go outside together because our kids behave well even if they are younger than him . Our two friend stopped going out with other friends with louds children because his son would be uncomfortable or anxious.. a child like this would have forced them to go out for not causing a crisis to the child (triggered by screams, loud noises, doesn't tolerate hearing crying), it is not a matter of annoyance, sometimes not managing your child can cause problems for children others..

dons avatar
Calypso poet
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

People have no clue how much of a problem that is. I worked at a place where the owners autistic niece came in a couple hours a week to 'work'. She had extremely sensitive hearing. I actually got in a verbal fight with an obnoxious manager who thought it was funny to startle her by banging on our metal office door. I have tinnitus and very good hearing so high pitched noises hurt. We joke that I hear dog whistles. But I can take a deep breath and try to move on. Some autistic people can't or don't know how to speak up for themselves. There are plenty of places like Dave & Busters or McDonald's if your kids need to run, scream and eat. Please keep them out of any place that serves escargot! 😂

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krois-pe-el avatar
Slune
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's f*****g reckless from the parents to let kids screaming their lungs out,without leaving the place and try to distract it. I would have confronted the mother , too

noneanon avatar
Random Anon
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't have kids and likely never will. So I do not understand how some parents can be so entitled. They chose to be parents so the kids are their responsibility. People may make concessions to aid them, here and there, but that should not be seen as a given. Otherwise these parents are just trashy role models that think getting knocked up entitles them to be special snowflakes.

blue-stars avatar
cursed--alien
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If your child is shrieking, it is better for not only people around you, but even for the child, if you remove them from the situation. They may be overstimulated and need space to calm down.

artidoane avatar
Arti Doane
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is the "no consequences" generations idea of parenting. It's all YOUR fault, not my childs.

johanna_zamora avatar
Grumble O'Pug
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Honestly, I am sick of these, Bored Panda. Entitled parents, keep your shrieking children at home.

edc_82 avatar
Lola
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh yes, the entitled parent and entitled child who think everyone should be subject to their tantrums. I don’t care if you have 12 children, if I’m in a restaurant, I do not want to hear the tantrums. Going out for some people is a special treat and some have to save money to be able to do that. If you cannot control your children, then you shouldn’t have any. Simple as that.

ms_leighannposton avatar
Leigh Ann Poston
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you were at Chucky Cheese, it would've been out of line, maybe. Other than that, it was on the parents all the way.

monkeywrenchproductions avatar
Monkeywrench Productions
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

parents: if you were dumb enough to have a child, realize your days of going out, having fun and living normal lives are over. stop ruining it for the rest of us

lillukka79 avatar
Lillukka79
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I was a kid, if we didn't behave in the restaurant we left to go home and eat something boring. So we learned to behave. What is it with these parents without common sence?

ahmadpujianto avatar
The Cute Cat
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Kids tantrum is bad for the parent. Don't make other people suffer for problem of your kids.

infectedvoice avatar
InfectedVoice
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm mad just reading this, kids are kids if they're playing and making noise that's fine but 10 minutes of screaming, no no no no no.

v_sjoberg avatar
Veronica Sjöberg
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would say like "meh". I do understand the girl's point and i feel for the mom (i have 3 kids myself). I do believe children get to be children even in public (they ARE loud and messy but they are humans too and they need to learn) but if its a real tantrum and it goes on for 5 mins or so its time to leave. At that point it has reached the "point of no return" and it wont stop then and there. The kid is most likely overtired when that happens. And its just bad for everyone to stay in that case.

jppennington avatar
JayWantsACat
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA, though probably should have asked the restaurant staff to intervene, which they should have done so without being prompted to anyways. I dont have kids and I try to give those that do the benefit of the doubt when it comes to their kids screaming and crying. But, as someone else commented, I'm sick of people thinking the world revolves around them because they s**t out a kid like literally billions of other people do. If you bring a baby to any public space and it disturbs other people, and after a reasonable amount of time they dont calm down then YOU SHOULD LEAVE. You don't take precedence over anyone else and, in fact, have less precedence than anyone else considering your situation is actively worsening everyone else's.

camlynn1234 avatar
Miss Frankfurter
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

May be just me, but I think that the only place a 2 year should get taken out to eat is McDonald's or some place like that. Theyre going to have meltdowns. It part of being 2. But, even at 2 behavioral issues need to be addressed. Tantrums are not ok and if you keep it up we're leaving. A 2 year old can progressively understand that. However, it was the management's place to address the issue and in not doing so, well that says a lot right there and I wouldn't be back. I would have gone to the manager and spoken to them. In speaking to the parents they're doing so with official authority.

blatherskitenoir avatar
blatherskitenoir
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I sincerely doubt the waitstaff or management would touch talking with the parents with a ten foot pole. The poster states it was not a formal, fine dining establishment, which is about the only place they'd be willing to risk it.

tasmaniandemon82792 avatar
Tobias the Tiger
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hell, sometimes I really wish people would do something when their kids start screaming in restaurants or other public areas. I still remember sitting near a family with multiple young children that were doing pretty much every awful thing that a small child could do in a restaurant (one that kept screaming, a few that were chasing each other around, another that was watching videos at a fairly loud volume with no headphones, etc) and the parents didn't do anything.

amie-redman avatar
Amie Redman
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have a 9 year old. When he was a baby/toddler and would have fits, my husband or I would take him outside to calm down. Often he had a need that wasn’t being met, and wasn’t verbal yet. We would return after or get our food to go. Our child’s issue (teething, etc) is not every else’s to deal with. It’s called being a responsible parent. Don’t be a d**k.

jules_11 avatar
Jules
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Absolutely having children us a conscious choice of the parents and that means you have to put up with screeching and all the other 'joys' of parenthood. It is NOT acceptable to make others put up with it so either shut them up, remove them or don't take them to such places. Simple as.

colemanalexandria01 avatar
Alex Coleman
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Do people not realize that at some point you have to be in public with a child? I mean yes it's courteous to take your child away and try to calm them down but as a single mother sometimes I have to leave the house and not spend 6 hours trying to pick up milk because I have to keep leaving the store.

kjl01 avatar
Karen Lyon
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As a teacher of young children for the last 32 years, I've learned that temper tantrums are not really the norm. Little ones who indulge in frequent temper tantrums usually do so because it gets them what they want. It's not to say that all children don't lose it on occasion. What I'm saying is that acting like the Mom does in this scenario allows them to think it's okay to kick off when they're unhappy. Parents don't have to be mean, just firm and consistent about not allowing children to be out of control. I think first adults need to help the child calm down, but if that little one is really being difficult, then consequences should follow. I know parents who have essentially said, "Okay, if you're going to act like this, we're going home and having peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for dinner." Kids can learn pretty quickly that they miss out on stuff if they just go off.

erine avatar
Erin E
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ughh. I have two kids and totally agree with her! Parents that just ignore their kids are the worst.

lynnnoyes avatar
elfin
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think it is compassionate to calmly tell parents that they are responsible for their children's behavior in public. It's also a good life lesson for the kids.

jaybird3939 avatar
Jaybird3939
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I remember going out to dinner with my family to nice restaurants. I can tell you, if either my brother or I acted like that, we'd be taken out to the car to calm down. I think that worked pretty well. I've never done it since, and I'm in my 50's.

faeryiis avatar
Lululoohoo
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA but also kind of TA. Its your right obviously to have a quiet meal in a restaurant but you should have taken it up with management instead of approaching the family directly. Nobody would take kindly or nicely to having another patron come at them with parenting tips or shaming. Its embarrassing and of course they would become defensive. Ahh to be young & childless again...come back around to this issue when you're in your 30's and have had your own children. You might have more compassion and sympathy then.

highdeserted avatar
Public Citizen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Total irresponsibility on the part of the Restaurant Management. As someone who suffers with Hyeracusis [thanks to an accident caused by a drunk driver] such action by children is not just an intrusion but an actual assault with battery as it can trigger a migraine episode. I take responsibility for my affliction by using industrial grade earplugs and noise cancelling devices when I am in public. It isn't too much of a stretch to ~expect~ parents to engage in responsible parenting when they bring their offspring into a public setting where a minimum amount of decorum is expected.

annagsalerno avatar
Anna Salerno
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Take the dang crying kid OUTSIDE!!! Do everyone a favor and let them enjoy a peaceful meal!!!

ronniebeaton avatar
Ronnie Beaton
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You get similar situations in cinemas. If a child is unable to sit on their backside, keep quiet, and pay attention to the movie for its duration, then don't take them to the cinema.

phil84vaive avatar
Phil Vaive
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Everyone saying it was the restaurant staff's responsibility to deal with this...uh. no, it wasn't. They aren't the police of politeness. They are servers and restaurant managers. It is no more their responsibility to handle the rude parents than it is anybody else's.

juniorcj82 avatar
littlesaresare avatar
littlesaresare
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Because unfortunately some circles subscribe to a "bad mum" culture, where people celebrate being negligent parents and letting their children run feral in public and then ganging up on anyone who asks them to be more considerate. Not a joke. Constance Hall is a great example in Australia. A particularly public scenario with her involved essentially the same situation as this, but she also let her child run around and hit people and climb on furniture and fling food. Absolutely horrible behvaiour. But the response was very different - she and her blogger friends have so much influence that the person who spoke up was publically shamed and abused by even the news media, because of the new cultural idea that mothers cannot be criticised, ever, and that parenting is apparently so hard that alcoholism and negligence is celebrated. If you look at the (thankfully) downvoted comments lower in the thread, you will see this entitlement quite clearly.

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aliquida avatar
Aliquid
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As a parent I took my children to "family restaurants" where the assumption is that there would be kids there, until I knew they were well behaved enough to go somewhere else. My oldest was really good, and adventurous with trying new foods, so by the time she was 7 we would take her to more "fancy" restaurants, and she loved the experience. "Can we go to one of the places with cloth napkins and no kids menu?" --- anyway I digress. Back when we were in family restaurants, if either of my kids started crying or whining or anything, I would immediately take them out to the parking lot until they calmed down. There was one time where I ended up calling my wife on her cell (texting was annoying in flip phone days)... and I told her "finish dinner and get mine as take-away... we aren't coming back in"

njscrutton avatar
OhForSmegSake
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

On the one hand 2 year old are noisy. They are still at an age where they are discovering the world and themselves so shouting/shrieking for no reason is one of the things they do. Having said that, parents need to realise that their sweet little angel is not always going to be tolerated and either teach them "inside voice" or takenthe kid outside so s/he can scream and release that energy away from other diners.

kdreetz_1 avatar
Kimberly Brown
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This story made me cringe when I read, “Me and my …” As far as I’m concerned, if you have no basic grasp of grammar, you don’t have any right to tell someone else what to do.

annarepp avatar
Anna Repp
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I call AH just because she called the child "it." Whatever was going on in there I do not trust her account. IT???

marsfka avatar
MarsFKA
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Another pathetic AITA post from someone who needs comfort and cuddles from complete strangers. Funny how these AITA posts all read like they have been written by the same person.

boredpanda_99 avatar
SirWriteALot
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"you need to parent them better"??? With that sentence you made yourself the asshole.

ghoul72 avatar
Venic
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Last post there nails it dead on. I've known people to complain about waiting "all day" for an inquiry made less than an hour ago. I'm lucky enough that the inquiries I deal with are timestamped so this is easy to confirm or refute. Not saying they had no cause to be annoyed of course, but "ten minutes" should be taken with a grain of salt unless they had a stopwatch. Staff should have handled it if it had gone on long, but it's hard to know how much time passed objectively. Subjective time is a heck of a thing.

kathinka avatar
Katinka Min
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It doesn't sound like the poster phrased her request in a very nice way. (What's with this 'i paid for my meal, nonsense. Of course, she did, everybody did), so while it is reasonable to expect parents ot take a shrieking toddle outside, I am going with ESH.

spajuelo16 avatar
Shirley Pajuelo
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yea you are girl. You’re an asshole and a big one with a lot of nerve. You’re young and you don’t know yet how hard it can be for a child to sit still in a restaurant. “Parent better” is a terrible and laughable comment on your end, but you know what I will let time show you. If and when you become a parent, hopefully you do everything right and live up to your own standards. Everything that goes around comes around, remember that.

aliquida avatar
Aliquid
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hmm... just remembered another factor I considered when I had small kids. 90% of the time that a small child has a meltdown is because they are tired or hungry. Seriously, that's the main contributor. We would schedule our activities around our kids naps. Grocery shopping? After a nap, and meal. Going to a restaurant? I guess we are having dinner at a weird hour, because that lines up with nap-time... and give the kid a good snack before we get there.

zanoni608 avatar
Patti Vance
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

ESH. while i have taken my poorly behaving child out of restaurants, sometimes even before our food had come and had to request to have it to go, i'm not sure if i could agree with this person. why? because this is a very subjective view of the incident and, frankly, ten minutes of a shrieking kid is a long time. i am not denying that the child was screaming or that she was annoyed but that this may have not been exactly described. could the parents have been finishing up and preparing to go when she approached? could the child have been experiencing a sudden discomfort? also, i find it hard to believe that the parents would continue to eat while a child was screaming. and, finally, most - not all - parents are usually aware when their kid is melting down in a public place that this is annoying to others. so, in my opinion, she may have overreacted to the situation while at the same time the parents may have not responded to the situation as quickly as they should.

ylenia-vitangeli avatar
Ylenia Vitangeli
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sometimes children just cry... you can't control them or parent them better.Everyone has been a little human so far, and EVERYONE has cried in inappropriate situations. Just, don't hate children, maybe the parents are feeling ashame, and someone saying that they have to leave or be better parents, it's not helping at all...

dons avatar
Calypso poet
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have been to restaurants with friends who have toddlers. The crying starts, the child goes. But my one friend started her kid out early and she was an angle (edit to say angel but she did sit with good posture so maybe an angle) in a restaurant. I even sat next to her at a wedding and she was well behaved. Yes, kids need to learn to eat in restaurants but that doesn't mean the rest of us should hear crying and screaming. Some of us only go out to dinner a couple times per year even pre pandemic! If your child might scream please go to some place more family friendly. Not a steak and seafood place.

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Jo Choto
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you have a problem like this, you ask to speak to the manager and you direct them to the problem. You don't police the restaurant yourself. If you are a parent and your child starts screaming (and you have another parent with you to watch other children if you have them) you take the child outside until they have calmed down. You do not subject people to your screaming child in a public place. Ever.

vickielm490 avatar
Vickie Martin
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Toddlers are going to act out in public. Its inevitable. NTA for approaching the parents, but it would've served you better to put the responsiblity for removing the noise to the restaraunt employees instead of confronting the parents. And holding them responsible for doing something about it. I mean what did you think the parents of a toddler screaming his head off were going to agree with you? Public confrontations never end well no matter who is at fault.

lisac72 avatar
Not Proud British
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So many unknowns here. We weren't there. Was it 10 minutes? Was the child shrieking for no reason? Did the parents really not do anything about it? One person's perspective is wildly different from anothers. When my kids were toddlers, my husband and I would rarely go out for a meal (being skint) but when we did, we were on edge the whole time in case the kids made a noise, dropped something, spoke too loudly, etc. if someone had approached me like this I would probably have burst into tears. It's easy to say that the tot should have been taken outside, but that might have made the other kids make a scene, or made the tot even more hysterical. There are issues that, as bystanders, we have no idea about. Let's not even mention the possibility of autism/aspergers, etc. As parents we are often left out in the cold, shunned by respectable society who like kids to be seen and not heard. I would like to hear the parents' pov on this. Cause I bet there is so much more to this story.

lenonis avatar
John Dough
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

None of this changes that if a child is screaming it needs to be taken outside. Period.

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Katerina Huskova
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh I LOVE childless youngsters to give me lessons about parenting 😎 I see problems on both sides - I only take kids to a restaurant 1.if they know how to behave (but it's ME, the parent, who has to teach them) 2.if there's a place for kids to play = they are welcome there...on the other hand the young lady is like "It's MY MONEY and you all has to should up a serve me..." like you can buy anything. Bit in general much ado about nothing 🤷🏻‍♀️ the young lady is a happy person if her biggest problem in her life is one crying baby in a restaurant 🙃

littlesaresare avatar
littlesaresare
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh I LOVE assholes with children to give me lessons about consideration. Because everyone knows that popping out a baby makes you the queen of the universe, and gives you the right to treat everyone around you like s**t, and expect everyone else to ask how high when you scream at them to jump. You are the happy person if the biggest problem in your life is complaining that strangers don't want to tolerate your entitled bullshit. 🙃

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ebookab avatar
ebook ab
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I always wonder if its not mother with crying baby, but giant, agresive guy would you act the same?

lindamatheny avatar
Oogiebogieaugiedaddy
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Take it from me I had one child. Period! I knew being a mother was not for me. You cannot be the kids only care giver because you will loose your mind. My son had all grand parents alive! I left my husband after 5.5 years because he thought women should be subservient and he gave me the crabs. I told my MIL I wanted them to be in my sons life and she said "I pray for the day your son hurts as bad as you hurt my son." If I I never see xxxxx you won't step one foot on my property. Well bitch got her wish as my son shot him self from the rejection and survived. She buried her son at 52. Watch what you pray for!!!!! My parents never did one thing with my son either.

lenonis avatar
John Dough
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What did this r/thathappened story have to do with the article exactly?

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Vuun
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This person does come off as kind of an AH. Not for asking politely after 10 minutes of wailing (I'm sceptical about both these points) but little things like referring to the child as 'it'. Also, a 2-year-old had a meltdown "for no fathomable reason". They do that you know. And the only way to prevent that is bad parenting, not good parenting.

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lara
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would have written a note to the mother and said "Thank you for bringing that child to the restaurant tonight. I was considering having another child, but no longer. "

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chrissy goodman
Community Member
2 years ago

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i used to b a nanny for a friends child. her daughter was 2 at the time and could occassionally b difficult i would usually take her to a pizza restaurant down the street id get the stroller and id walk there. whenever she acted up id instantly go outside holding her and id tell her that she wont get her pizza treat if she keeps screaming she would then calm down wed go back in and id give her a coloring book or something from "christie's bag of distractions" worked every time. children dont understand the concept of waiting for food. these parents were inconsiderate for letting their child carry on and it also wasnt right for the staff to ignore it for as long as they did. ive also worked in the restaurant business and anytime id see this where the parents just let it happen i stopped wat i was doing and either asked if they could take the child outside to calm them down or id say excuse me to the parents and ask the child if they wanted some crayons and a coloring book (i brought them with me bc of my previous nanny job...u need distractions) about 80% of the time the kid calms down wen i asked them instead of talking to the parents. about 30% of the time parents would listen to me and take their child outside. guess which option i went with 100% of the time after having a ton of parents tell me to shut up or say "dont tell me wat to do ur just a waitress". i say NTA bc ive been scoffed at, told to shut up, treated like dirt and yelled at by parents who think their child screaming is perfectly fine all bc they r a child. i even witnessed a chain reaction a few times. one kid started screaming another started crying then another started crying that day we had ppl without kids complain, leave before ordering or take their food to go. those i could do nothing about and my co workers never said a thing i was the only one to ever speak up for the other customers. so for anyone saying it the restaurant job i can tell u dont rely on the staff to do something cuz they wont even if u ask chances r they will say the child is disturbing other customers and to calm them down but thats it. also parents dont always listen even if its the manager. the restaurant i worked at the owner had to come over to a table once and it got to the point where the owner said that he wouldnt allow them to come back if they didnt respect the other customers (one of the families that treated me like i was below them and just dirt btw) the family didnt even listen to him they told him to go away. they were told to leave and wen the owner had to ask twice he said he would have his staff take them out of the restaurant and that made them get up and leave. in case i didnt mention this was a high end steak house i worked at but we also considered it a family restaurant bc we did have a childrens menu but still this wasnt like an outback steak house or place like that it was a high end family owned steak house. once i was on disability and couldnt work i actually went there a few times and the 5th time i went i noticed the menu changed there was no more kids menu. i went into the back to see the owner and asked y he said "since u left ive had to deal with every child complaint bc no matter how many times i tell the staff to do something about it they dont" wen i worked there there was always at least 1 kid now none at all the oldest kid ive seen there is around 8 or 10 but thats rare. that one family did try to go back a few times wen i still worked there too which gave me the impression that they were very entitled ppl and they were better then everyone else and rules didnt apply to them....they were stopped every time. they tried to sue too but it failed bc of how many times they were politely asked to either calm down the child or leave by several staff members including the manager and owner. i wish smartphones were around wen i worked there bc someone wouldve definitely filmed and posted it and i wouldve gladly done a follow up video lol.

elli_22_sf avatar
Еленица Георгиева-Иванова
2 years ago

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I'm siding with the parents on this one. I believe the whole story is bias. First let's address the point that having a child is the parent's choice. Ok it is. It is also OP's choice to go to a restaurant that allowes children to be there. They could leave if the noise is disturbing them. You say OP paid for the meal? So did the parents, should they let their meal get cold instead of eating it? Well if the parents didn't want to deal with their kids why bring them? As a parent I know in some cases it is impossible to get a baby sitter... For years at a time. Are the parents not human beings? You say OP deserves a nice meal, and the parents don't? So, ok take your kid, but if it is screaming take care of it... Well do you know why the kid is screaming? The parents are the only ones that might know, maybe the kid is teething... It was screaming for 10 minutes? And the parents did nothing? Doubt it. Just because OP didn't notice or underatand that the parents were indeed trying to calm the child does not mean they didn't. Take the kid outside? Maybe it was cold, maybe it was raining. There are many factors that go in these parent's decision to let their child be noisy in a public place and none of them is for the sake of annoying everybody else present. Kids are unpredictable, loud and difficult. That is no reason to keep them away from society or to punish the parents.

claireskrine avatar
Just saying
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes, kids are unpredicatble, loud and difficult (I have kids). Therefore during these years you don't take them to restaurants where it is inappropriate to have unpredictable, loud and difficult people. You suck it up and go to McDonalds for the five years or so it takes for your toddlers to learn how to behave. Then you gradually introduce them to more grown up places, making sure they learn how to behave, until you can finally take your fully formed and delightfully behaved 18 year old to the Ivy.

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Linny H
Community Member
2 years ago

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I think that the poster was the a** and agree that she should have asked a manager to intervene. Or just handled a small inconvenience like an adult. I used to take my kid outside if were acting up, shame on the mom for lacking that consideration for other patrons. Also, I doubt it was a straight ten minutes of shrieking. Just seems that way.

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GratefulForPandas
Community Member
2 years ago

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While in this case maybe the parents should have taken the child out, I also think in some places people expect children to behave like adults and don't welcome them. Children are part of society and essentially banning them for not always being silent is wrong too. Also, It can be really hard to be a parent and enjoy a restaurant every once in a while.... you don't know what they've put up with the rest of the day.

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NgatiDreadz
Community Member
2 years ago

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YTA kids will be kids you don't know if that kid has problems or not you don't know the background to any of that families problems people always thinking about "me and my time and money" selfish pricks! The last time I checked you taste with your mouth not your ears don't care if I cop the hate

amberyoung_3 avatar
Caligirl20
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The screaming of a child can induce all kinds of stress in people that can put them off of food. It is the parents job to remove the child and take them to a quiet place to help them calm down. It's the only way a child is going to learn how to behave properly in a restaurant. I go out to dinner with my husband to get a break from my kids, not listen to someone else's screaming child fir 10+ minutes. I don't mind kids laughing and squealing or them yelling every so often. But I don't want to spend $20 a person and listen to a kid scream non stop.

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Patti
Community Member
2 years ago

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What a bithch. I can't wait until she has children. The universe will get you. Hahahahaha

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Missy Moo Moo
Community Member
2 years ago

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One thing that has helped me navigate through life... you can't control what other people do, you can only control your own actions. If I couldn't handle the noise, I would get my food to go and leave. Stop policing others, life is so much easier

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Hans
Community Member
2 years ago

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I find it shocking that this discussion is about approaching the parents or not for the sake of eating undisturbed. If you read the original reddit, people write stuff like parents need to "control" their children and "remove" them if they disturb, as if they were mindless robots. If this story is true as it is told by the OP, the real question is whether it is not justified to approach parents who leave a child cry for 10 minutes while continueing to eat for the sake of the poor child. Children do not cry for no reasons. I do not understand how anyone would rather be disturbed by a crying toddler than empathic with him or her! Honestly, I would have offered the parents help, risking that they take this as an offence.

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Vorknkx
Community Member
2 years ago

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One detail that everyone seems to be missing - we don't know WHY the child was "shrieking" and assume it's just a tantrum. What if there was some serious and legit reason for the "shrieking"?

gfbarros avatar
Joey Jo Jo Shabadoo
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Then the child should have been taken home or to the hospital if there was something "serious and legit" reason for the shrieking. Do you continue eating your pasta when somebody at your table is screaming in pain and fear?

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amberyoung_3 avatar
Caligirl20
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The person asking the parents to remove the screaming kid is the a**h**e? Because they aren't. Common courtesy is to remove the screaming child until they calmed down. I don't mind rambunctious children messing around in their booths/seats or talking to me. But I am going out to eat to have a peaceful dinner away from my own loud kids. Date nights are rare for my husband and I. I don't want to go drop $50/$60 dollars just to listen to a child scream for half of my meal. I could have stayed home and listened to my teens argue for free.

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Claire Nichols
Community Member
2 years ago

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The child may have been special needs. We should all as human beings be understanding of others. Bet if it was your child you would think differently! I can almost guarantee, this, THIS!!!!. Was your child at some point!! Please be respectful and understanding! Especially when children are involved!!!!

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Claire Nichols
Community Member
2 years ago

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YTA! Are you kidding me?? Do you have any idea if the child has special needs? Bet if your children were behaving like that it would be different!! Children behaving badly, without parental supervision is not a good thing. However you have no idea what the situation is! Total AH!!

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lenka
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

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I am a parent and have lost count of the times I have taken one of my children out restaurants/movies/theatres/galleries and museums etc so they are not disruptive to other people. Should the parents have taken the child out? Probably yes. Are you still an arsehole? Probably yes. It was a pretty d**k move to shame the parents like that when you dont know what or why the child is screaming. You demonstrated lack of grace and compassion. I hope you are never on the receiving end of such arseholery.

bp_10 avatar
WilvanderHeijden
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The staff of the restaurant should have taken care of the problem. Since they obviously didn't want to do that, the girl was absolutely right to confront the parents. Other guests heard the shrieking child so there's no way that the staff wouldn't have noticed it. But I guess someone told them to ignore the noise because "the customer is always right".

carolyngerbrands avatar
Caro Caro
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You beat me to it Wil. And, why is this a question (NTA). It's normal if a terrible-2's tantrum is taken outside for a time out.

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james_fox1984 avatar
Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA. I have kids myself and they don't just cry or tantrum, they have actual meltdowns. When my kids had those ear piercing screams, I would try everything I could to try and calm the situation. Then I would take them outside and if neither worked, then we left. There of course are exceptions but if no-one is at least trying to calm the child, then they are just inconsiderate assholes.

troux avatar
Troux
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sound very reasonable. Part of having kids is getting used to having your plans ruined and being able to handle it. I hope you never had to experience a childless 23 year old telling you to 'parent better' when your toddlers scream.

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emory_ce avatar
Carol Emory
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This happened in a store. Woman enters with several kids and the youngest girl starts screaming. She wasn't in distress..she just liked the echo of her shrieks through the store. Every time the girl did it, I could hear people's hearing aids whistling as they quickly tried to turn them down. When we approached the mom, she says "Oh..she's just singing..." I said "Let her do it outside. Her 'singing' is setting off hearing aids and making it impossible for people to communicate with each other. Either that or get her to stop." The woman got pissed saying we were stifling her daughter's creativity. I repeated "Let her be creative outside!" The manager finally told her to leave. Apparently he didn't like her "singing" either.

meghanhibicke avatar
Evil Little Thing
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When my son was one he loved the echoing of the grocery store, especially the frozen foods section. For months, every time we would go shopping he would start sing-screaming about his penis. I guess he was really proud of it or something? It was both hilarious and mortifying.

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markfuller avatar
Mark Fuller
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Gratified to see that even parents don't think it's cool to let their screaming shitty brats bawl the house down and ruin life for everyone else. I grew up in an age where it was a goddam privilege be taken into a "place for grown ups" and you most certainly knew to be barely seen and not at all heard. Personally couldn't have that awkward conversation but totally respect those that do. Same as adults providing a running commentary at the theatre - shut the F**K up!!

sweetangelce04 avatar
CatWoman312
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don’t think she did anything wrong. Part of the experience of dining out is the ambiance and if you’re dealing with a screaming child that part, that you paid for, is being slighted. I think parents tend to have a if I have to deal with it everyone has to mentality and I really hate that. No one asked you to have kids and it’s not the world’s problem because you did. If your kids can’t behave in public then maybe they shouldn’t be allowed out. Then again I’m one of those people who go out of the way to consider others and it seems people like myself are rare gems these days.

kathrynbaylis_1 avatar
Kathryn Baylis
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She is most definitely NTA here. Those suggesting she go through the restaurant employees or management are forgetting one thing. Employees won’t do anything to offend a customer, especially if they depend on tips. Management usually won’t do anything but appease and allow bad behavior to continue, because they’re out for money and want no bad word of mouth advertising. So yeah, she had to deal with it herself, as going through the restaurant wouldn’t have given her any satisfaction.

dons avatar
Calypso poet
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not true. I specifically remember a TGIF that had my BF and I seated next to a center table of 6 with 3 kids. Of the approx 4 year olds were wandering and running. The wait staff was trying to dodge them. I asked to be moved or we were leaving. We were moved, got a couple free drinks and noticed the manager came out to speak to the parents. It was obvious why we moved so they gave us dirty looks but we just ignored them.

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anneking68 avatar
StrawberryParfait
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not the asshole. Children can be very disruptive, and a restaurant where people are enjoying their meals is not the place to ignore it. It is perfectly reasonable to request that the child be taken outside, especially since there were two parents at the table. If they weren't willing to do so, then they should have been asked to leave by management. This is a failure on the part of management. Kids will be kids, but there is a time and place for allowances. A restaurant that is not one primarily for children is not one of them.

twostroketerror avatar
Pungent Sauce
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Too young to really remember, but my mom said I was given a choice of sitting and eating with them or having my temper tantrum by myself out in the car (when you could still do things like that’). Seems I went with the car all of once, then decided to eat with them after that. I still have excellent restaurant manners, lol

viviane_katz avatar
Viviane
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

With two parents there, they could have taken turns taking the kid outside. I watched that happen in a restaurant. In that situation, it took two or three trips outside for the child to calm down.

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emmagee avatar
Emma Gee
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you don't want to take your obnoxious child outside but you want everyone to cater to you... then you should be paying for everyone's ruined dinner. Not the asshole. Ever. The staff should have taken care of it. But they weren't.... . So everyone should just endure the bullshit!? No. She had the balls to try to fix the problem. Everyone but her is in the wrong. I don't have kids mostly by choice.... so why should I have to listen to your when I'm paying for a fucken meal at a nice restaurant. Go somewhere kid friendly or be a good person and remove your human rooster.

marneederider40 avatar
Marnie
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Agreed, except even in a "kid-friendly" place, a child should not be left to just shriek for minutes and minutes. Other parents and little kids also don't want to hear that no matter where they are.

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hlmorgan avatar
Big Chungus
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My parents used to do this to us as kids if we acted up. We were taken to the car and we all had to sit there until we stfu. I plan on doing the same with my future child because it did teach me to behave in public. Plus, we were never taken to nicer places until we got a bit older for this same reason.

hotrobot11 avatar
Hotrobot
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA!!! Like 1000% NTA. If this was an adult they would be asked to leave so why should other patrons have their experience ruined by another person? I completely understand that they are a child and are currently in the process of learning how to regulate their emotions, volume and just learning how to exist, but that does not excuses the parenta from dealing with the situation. Furthermore if the kid feels that this is the only way they can be heard it's because it has been reinforced by their parents actions. Kids have such a limited ability to communicate, so they will use what is most effective and using their instinctual logic if your not being heard you scream louder, so this is even more of a reflection on the parents being shitty parents because their child took the nuclear option because they knew no other option was available and it still didn't work.

lorireese avatar
Wheeskers
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There was a woman in a dept store letting her two under 5 kids run and scream and tear s**t up. The hub and I were commenting that our kids would never be allowed to behave that way and we walked out of that area. She confronted me in another aisle about what we said, asking if I did have kids and what she was supposed to do? Her kids needed shoes and they wouldn't cooperate. I told her yes, I did have kids and if they behaved like that we would have left the store and no one got new shoes that day. Oh well. She looked at me like I was nuts. Obviously the children were in charge. Oh, and she did not clean up their mess either.

metallic_geisha avatar
Metallic Geisha
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So glad the tide of thought has changed bc I remember when this would have been YTA across the board. Sincerely, a mom of 4

assistanttodj avatar
Assistant to DJ
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA. Very tired of parents thinking the whole world has to move aside for their spawn. Why is it when people have kids, they start to think they're in their own Truman Show, and the world revolves around their family unit? Does having a kid make you forget there's a whole rest of the planet and it's other 7billion inhabitants who don't give a crap about your inability to use condoms?

b_nut137 avatar
Pheebs
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I… might have told a table of adults that their vacation was going to become a lot less “happiest place on Earth” if they didn’t stop their 5 children from slamming their forks and spoons on every damn thing on the table (plates, glasses, napkin holders…) while singing Baby Shark. And while they’re at it, can they please give the one child that’s getting progressively louder some attention so she’ll stop screaming every random thought in her head in an effort to get a response? It had been a solid 20 minutes of 4 adults pretending they didn’t have kids. I was ready to stab either them or myself with a fork.

carey_ensley_monroe avatar
Carey Cakes
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have 2 kids. I can't tell you how many times I had to eat my food out of a to go box in the car because my kid was acting up in the restaurant and I took him out. Even while traveling, when we had no other option than to eat at a restaurant, if either of them are disruptive, one of us will remove them from the situation. If you stay, you're just setting them up for failure.

ayelet-cooper avatar
alwaysMispelled
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't have my own human offspring but I was a nanny for years. When a child would throw a fit in public, we immediately left. Not only to spare those around us, but so child learns there are consequences.

martingibbs734 avatar
martin734
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Thankfully quite a few of the pubs around here don't allow children under 12 in them and those are the pubs I usually eat at, especially as almost all of them are very dog friendly. There are few things I enjoy less than going out for meal and have parents let their children misbehave in the pub or restaurant. I certainly would not have been able to do it. My parents were very strict and made it clear that if we were going to adult places like pubs and restaurants, then we were to behave like adults. Their attitude was than in places like that children should be seen but not heard. I tend to agree with them. People would be very upset, and rightly so, if I allowed my dogs to run around and bark constantly, so why should it be any different for children.

dons avatar
Calypso poet
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I worked in a bar that unfortunately some people mistook for a place like Applebee's when we weren't busy. But we weren't allowed to turn away under 21 until @5pm because of lunch customers. (Subway style subs and microwave wings! Yum) So we would give "someone" money to play the jukebox. Limp bizkit Hot Dog and and Kid Rock F You Blind usually meant they wouldn't be back. Throw in some Nelly especially Batter Up because they heard The Jefferson's so they started listening! 🤬😂

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jknbt2 avatar
jk nbt
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can top this story... I was stuck on a full plane on a long flight back home on a very late Friday night. Most of the plane was full of exhausted businessmen like me. Sure enough, my luck was to get the seat next to a guy with a one year old kid. My sympathies go out to the child, because he was tired and unhappy too. He screamed like someone was pulling out his fingernails with pliers the entire trip across the continent. There was no place to move since the plane was full. I even took long visits to the bathroom just to get away from the screaming. I have carried earplugs on my flights since then... oh, well...

dons avatar
Calypso poet
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Are you sure that was a one year old and not me? I hate flying and my taxi driver who picked me up at O'hare spoke just enough English to make fun of me for being drunk. No, my eyes were red and swollen from crying all the way to the airport because I never flew by myself and was terrified!

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offkeysinger avatar
OffKeySinger
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA. I remember trying to eat out in my son's first 2 years with a lot of anxiety. I preferred not to eat out in case there was issues, but when I I did, I made sure to have a plan B if my son had a tantrum. I held myself responsible for bad behaviors in public because it affects other people. I was very lucky that my son was very well behaved at that early age, but I still paused to consider contributing factors to an exception when planning on dining out. This period in time actually made me a better cook

nightfalltwen avatar
Kimberley McMillan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA. If your children cannot behave in a sit-down restaurant, then you shouldn't be going anywhere but McDonalds with its play place.

holliemarie1995 avatar
Hollie Marie
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As someone who works in retail the amount of times I'm like will that child shut up but I can't do anything cuz I'll get written up, the same probably goes for the waiters if enough people complained then maybe they could make a case of intervening however they have to consider their jobs. The woman who confronted them had nothing to lose so she was right to say something she wasn't aggressive or angry she just said can you take the child away.

reptilegirl30 avatar
Tacos Are Tasty
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA. The kid was shrieking for 10 minutes and it doesn't seem like the parents made any attempt to quiet the kid. I'd say the OP was more than patient for letting it go on for 10 minutes and these parents are the assholes.

kathmorgan avatar
kath morgan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You choose to have kids. You choose to take them into restaurants that aren't kid-and family targeted. You choose to permit them to shriek and behave badly without any consequence.

dons avatar
Calypso poet
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have no kids and will admit I don't have as much patience as others. But I have also been a server and bar manager. The young lady should have discreetly asked to be moved to another table and if that wasn't an option have a manager speak to the parents. Back in the day of choice of smoking section we chose smoking when it was obvious there were a lot of kids. I cant understand why they haven't taught the hostess to seat people with kids away from a couple who is obviously dressed for dinner.

parmeisan avatar
Parmeisan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Honest question. Many of these commenters are saying it would be less rude to go directly to the manager of the restaurant, but that seems MORE rude to me. It seems passive-aggressive. Am I out of touch? Would most people not prefer to be spoken to directly?

samyobado avatar
Sam Yobado
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think I was there. It was more like a minute of crying after some on an off. It was also pissing rain outside. I was waiting to see if the mom was going to murder this girl who implied she needed to learn how to parent better. The mother did not. The family left, but not early, only after they had finished their meals. From my perspective the girl came off as entitled and the mom came off as tired.

fairydragon avatar
Luka Verheijen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As I live in a noisy neighbourhood, I can handle a lot of noise, but crying kids are just painful, especially for 10 minutes. Yes, parenting is hard abd I was quite tge difficult kid too, but still

francescaannoni avatar
Francesca Annoni
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have two friends with an autistic child.. he hate sounds too loud and we often go outside together because our kids behave well even if they are younger than him . Our two friend stopped going out with other friends with louds children because his son would be uncomfortable or anxious.. a child like this would have forced them to go out for not causing a crisis to the child (triggered by screams, loud noises, doesn't tolerate hearing crying), it is not a matter of annoyance, sometimes not managing your child can cause problems for children others..

dons avatar
Calypso poet
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

People have no clue how much of a problem that is. I worked at a place where the owners autistic niece came in a couple hours a week to 'work'. She had extremely sensitive hearing. I actually got in a verbal fight with an obnoxious manager who thought it was funny to startle her by banging on our metal office door. I have tinnitus and very good hearing so high pitched noises hurt. We joke that I hear dog whistles. But I can take a deep breath and try to move on. Some autistic people can't or don't know how to speak up for themselves. There are plenty of places like Dave & Busters or McDonald's if your kids need to run, scream and eat. Please keep them out of any place that serves escargot! 😂

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krois-pe-el avatar
Slune
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's f*****g reckless from the parents to let kids screaming their lungs out,without leaving the place and try to distract it. I would have confronted the mother , too

noneanon avatar
Random Anon
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't have kids and likely never will. So I do not understand how some parents can be so entitled. They chose to be parents so the kids are their responsibility. People may make concessions to aid them, here and there, but that should not be seen as a given. Otherwise these parents are just trashy role models that think getting knocked up entitles them to be special snowflakes.

blue-stars avatar
cursed--alien
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If your child is shrieking, it is better for not only people around you, but even for the child, if you remove them from the situation. They may be overstimulated and need space to calm down.

artidoane avatar
Arti Doane
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is the "no consequences" generations idea of parenting. It's all YOUR fault, not my childs.

johanna_zamora avatar
Grumble O'Pug
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Honestly, I am sick of these, Bored Panda. Entitled parents, keep your shrieking children at home.

edc_82 avatar
Lola
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh yes, the entitled parent and entitled child who think everyone should be subject to their tantrums. I don’t care if you have 12 children, if I’m in a restaurant, I do not want to hear the tantrums. Going out for some people is a special treat and some have to save money to be able to do that. If you cannot control your children, then you shouldn’t have any. Simple as that.

ms_leighannposton avatar
Leigh Ann Poston
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you were at Chucky Cheese, it would've been out of line, maybe. Other than that, it was on the parents all the way.

monkeywrenchproductions avatar
Monkeywrench Productions
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

parents: if you were dumb enough to have a child, realize your days of going out, having fun and living normal lives are over. stop ruining it for the rest of us

lillukka79 avatar
Lillukka79
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I was a kid, if we didn't behave in the restaurant we left to go home and eat something boring. So we learned to behave. What is it with these parents without common sence?

ahmadpujianto avatar
The Cute Cat
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Kids tantrum is bad for the parent. Don't make other people suffer for problem of your kids.

infectedvoice avatar
InfectedVoice
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm mad just reading this, kids are kids if they're playing and making noise that's fine but 10 minutes of screaming, no no no no no.

v_sjoberg avatar
Veronica Sjöberg
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would say like "meh". I do understand the girl's point and i feel for the mom (i have 3 kids myself). I do believe children get to be children even in public (they ARE loud and messy but they are humans too and they need to learn) but if its a real tantrum and it goes on for 5 mins or so its time to leave. At that point it has reached the "point of no return" and it wont stop then and there. The kid is most likely overtired when that happens. And its just bad for everyone to stay in that case.

jppennington avatar
JayWantsACat
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA, though probably should have asked the restaurant staff to intervene, which they should have done so without being prompted to anyways. I dont have kids and I try to give those that do the benefit of the doubt when it comes to their kids screaming and crying. But, as someone else commented, I'm sick of people thinking the world revolves around them because they s**t out a kid like literally billions of other people do. If you bring a baby to any public space and it disturbs other people, and after a reasonable amount of time they dont calm down then YOU SHOULD LEAVE. You don't take precedence over anyone else and, in fact, have less precedence than anyone else considering your situation is actively worsening everyone else's.

camlynn1234 avatar
Miss Frankfurter
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

May be just me, but I think that the only place a 2 year should get taken out to eat is McDonald's or some place like that. Theyre going to have meltdowns. It part of being 2. But, even at 2 behavioral issues need to be addressed. Tantrums are not ok and if you keep it up we're leaving. A 2 year old can progressively understand that. However, it was the management's place to address the issue and in not doing so, well that says a lot right there and I wouldn't be back. I would have gone to the manager and spoken to them. In speaking to the parents they're doing so with official authority.

blatherskitenoir avatar
blatherskitenoir
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I sincerely doubt the waitstaff or management would touch talking with the parents with a ten foot pole. The poster states it was not a formal, fine dining establishment, which is about the only place they'd be willing to risk it.

tasmaniandemon82792 avatar
Tobias the Tiger
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hell, sometimes I really wish people would do something when their kids start screaming in restaurants or other public areas. I still remember sitting near a family with multiple young children that were doing pretty much every awful thing that a small child could do in a restaurant (one that kept screaming, a few that were chasing each other around, another that was watching videos at a fairly loud volume with no headphones, etc) and the parents didn't do anything.

amie-redman avatar
Amie Redman
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have a 9 year old. When he was a baby/toddler and would have fits, my husband or I would take him outside to calm down. Often he had a need that wasn’t being met, and wasn’t verbal yet. We would return after or get our food to go. Our child’s issue (teething, etc) is not every else’s to deal with. It’s called being a responsible parent. Don’t be a d**k.

jules_11 avatar
Jules
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Absolutely having children us a conscious choice of the parents and that means you have to put up with screeching and all the other 'joys' of parenthood. It is NOT acceptable to make others put up with it so either shut them up, remove them or don't take them to such places. Simple as.

colemanalexandria01 avatar
Alex Coleman
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Do people not realize that at some point you have to be in public with a child? I mean yes it's courteous to take your child away and try to calm them down but as a single mother sometimes I have to leave the house and not spend 6 hours trying to pick up milk because I have to keep leaving the store.

kjl01 avatar
Karen Lyon
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As a teacher of young children for the last 32 years, I've learned that temper tantrums are not really the norm. Little ones who indulge in frequent temper tantrums usually do so because it gets them what they want. It's not to say that all children don't lose it on occasion. What I'm saying is that acting like the Mom does in this scenario allows them to think it's okay to kick off when they're unhappy. Parents don't have to be mean, just firm and consistent about not allowing children to be out of control. I think first adults need to help the child calm down, but if that little one is really being difficult, then consequences should follow. I know parents who have essentially said, "Okay, if you're going to act like this, we're going home and having peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for dinner." Kids can learn pretty quickly that they miss out on stuff if they just go off.

erine avatar
Erin E
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ughh. I have two kids and totally agree with her! Parents that just ignore their kids are the worst.

lynnnoyes avatar
elfin
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think it is compassionate to calmly tell parents that they are responsible for their children's behavior in public. It's also a good life lesson for the kids.

jaybird3939 avatar
Jaybird3939
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I remember going out to dinner with my family to nice restaurants. I can tell you, if either my brother or I acted like that, we'd be taken out to the car to calm down. I think that worked pretty well. I've never done it since, and I'm in my 50's.

faeryiis avatar
Lululoohoo
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

NTA but also kind of TA. Its your right obviously to have a quiet meal in a restaurant but you should have taken it up with management instead of approaching the family directly. Nobody would take kindly or nicely to having another patron come at them with parenting tips or shaming. Its embarrassing and of course they would become defensive. Ahh to be young & childless again...come back around to this issue when you're in your 30's and have had your own children. You might have more compassion and sympathy then.

highdeserted avatar
Public Citizen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Total irresponsibility on the part of the Restaurant Management. As someone who suffers with Hyeracusis [thanks to an accident caused by a drunk driver] such action by children is not just an intrusion but an actual assault with battery as it can trigger a migraine episode. I take responsibility for my affliction by using industrial grade earplugs and noise cancelling devices when I am in public. It isn't too much of a stretch to ~expect~ parents to engage in responsible parenting when they bring their offspring into a public setting where a minimum amount of decorum is expected.

annagsalerno avatar
Anna Salerno
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Take the dang crying kid OUTSIDE!!! Do everyone a favor and let them enjoy a peaceful meal!!!

ronniebeaton avatar
Ronnie Beaton
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You get similar situations in cinemas. If a child is unable to sit on their backside, keep quiet, and pay attention to the movie for its duration, then don't take them to the cinema.

phil84vaive avatar
Phil Vaive
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Everyone saying it was the restaurant staff's responsibility to deal with this...uh. no, it wasn't. They aren't the police of politeness. They are servers and restaurant managers. It is no more their responsibility to handle the rude parents than it is anybody else's.

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littlesaresare
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Because unfortunately some circles subscribe to a "bad mum" culture, where people celebrate being negligent parents and letting their children run feral in public and then ganging up on anyone who asks them to be more considerate. Not a joke. Constance Hall is a great example in Australia. A particularly public scenario with her involved essentially the same situation as this, but she also let her child run around and hit people and climb on furniture and fling food. Absolutely horrible behvaiour. But the response was very different - she and her blogger friends have so much influence that the person who spoke up was publically shamed and abused by even the news media, because of the new cultural idea that mothers cannot be criticised, ever, and that parenting is apparently so hard that alcoholism and negligence is celebrated. If you look at the (thankfully) downvoted comments lower in the thread, you will see this entitlement quite clearly.

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Aliquid
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As a parent I took my children to "family restaurants" where the assumption is that there would be kids there, until I knew they were well behaved enough to go somewhere else. My oldest was really good, and adventurous with trying new foods, so by the time she was 7 we would take her to more "fancy" restaurants, and she loved the experience. "Can we go to one of the places with cloth napkins and no kids menu?" --- anyway I digress. Back when we were in family restaurants, if either of my kids started crying or whining or anything, I would immediately take them out to the parking lot until they calmed down. There was one time where I ended up calling my wife on her cell (texting was annoying in flip phone days)... and I told her "finish dinner and get mine as take-away... we aren't coming back in"

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OhForSmegSake
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

On the one hand 2 year old are noisy. They are still at an age where they are discovering the world and themselves so shouting/shrieking for no reason is one of the things they do. Having said that, parents need to realise that their sweet little angel is not always going to be tolerated and either teach them "inside voice" or takenthe kid outside so s/he can scream and release that energy away from other diners.

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Kimberly Brown
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This story made me cringe when I read, “Me and my …” As far as I’m concerned, if you have no basic grasp of grammar, you don’t have any right to tell someone else what to do.

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Anna Repp
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I call AH just because she called the child "it." Whatever was going on in there I do not trust her account. IT???

marsfka avatar
MarsFKA
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Another pathetic AITA post from someone who needs comfort and cuddles from complete strangers. Funny how these AITA posts all read like they have been written by the same person.

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SirWriteALot
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"you need to parent them better"??? With that sentence you made yourself the asshole.

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Venic
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Last post there nails it dead on. I've known people to complain about waiting "all day" for an inquiry made less than an hour ago. I'm lucky enough that the inquiries I deal with are timestamped so this is easy to confirm or refute. Not saying they had no cause to be annoyed of course, but "ten minutes" should be taken with a grain of salt unless they had a stopwatch. Staff should have handled it if it had gone on long, but it's hard to know how much time passed objectively. Subjective time is a heck of a thing.

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Katinka Min
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It doesn't sound like the poster phrased her request in a very nice way. (What's with this 'i paid for my meal, nonsense. Of course, she did, everybody did), so while it is reasonable to expect parents ot take a shrieking toddle outside, I am going with ESH.

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Shirley Pajuelo
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yea you are girl. You’re an asshole and a big one with a lot of nerve. You’re young and you don’t know yet how hard it can be for a child to sit still in a restaurant. “Parent better” is a terrible and laughable comment on your end, but you know what I will let time show you. If and when you become a parent, hopefully you do everything right and live up to your own standards. Everything that goes around comes around, remember that.

aliquida avatar
Aliquid
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hmm... just remembered another factor I considered when I had small kids. 90% of the time that a small child has a meltdown is because they are tired or hungry. Seriously, that's the main contributor. We would schedule our activities around our kids naps. Grocery shopping? After a nap, and meal. Going to a restaurant? I guess we are having dinner at a weird hour, because that lines up with nap-time... and give the kid a good snack before we get there.

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Patti Vance
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

ESH. while i have taken my poorly behaving child out of restaurants, sometimes even before our food had come and had to request to have it to go, i'm not sure if i could agree with this person. why? because this is a very subjective view of the incident and, frankly, ten minutes of a shrieking kid is a long time. i am not denying that the child was screaming or that she was annoyed but that this may have not been exactly described. could the parents have been finishing up and preparing to go when she approached? could the child have been experiencing a sudden discomfort? also, i find it hard to believe that the parents would continue to eat while a child was screaming. and, finally, most - not all - parents are usually aware when their kid is melting down in a public place that this is annoying to others. so, in my opinion, she may have overreacted to the situation while at the same time the parents may have not responded to the situation as quickly as they should.

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Ylenia Vitangeli
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sometimes children just cry... you can't control them or parent them better.Everyone has been a little human so far, and EVERYONE has cried in inappropriate situations. Just, don't hate children, maybe the parents are feeling ashame, and someone saying that they have to leave or be better parents, it's not helping at all...

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Calypso poet
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have been to restaurants with friends who have toddlers. The crying starts, the child goes. But my one friend started her kid out early and she was an angle (edit to say angel but she did sit with good posture so maybe an angle) in a restaurant. I even sat next to her at a wedding and she was well behaved. Yes, kids need to learn to eat in restaurants but that doesn't mean the rest of us should hear crying and screaming. Some of us only go out to dinner a couple times per year even pre pandemic! If your child might scream please go to some place more family friendly. Not a steak and seafood place.

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Jo Choto
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you have a problem like this, you ask to speak to the manager and you direct them to the problem. You don't police the restaurant yourself. If you are a parent and your child starts screaming (and you have another parent with you to watch other children if you have them) you take the child outside until they have calmed down. You do not subject people to your screaming child in a public place. Ever.

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Vickie Martin
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Toddlers are going to act out in public. Its inevitable. NTA for approaching the parents, but it would've served you better to put the responsiblity for removing the noise to the restaraunt employees instead of confronting the parents. And holding them responsible for doing something about it. I mean what did you think the parents of a toddler screaming his head off were going to agree with you? Public confrontations never end well no matter who is at fault.

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Not Proud British
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So many unknowns here. We weren't there. Was it 10 minutes? Was the child shrieking for no reason? Did the parents really not do anything about it? One person's perspective is wildly different from anothers. When my kids were toddlers, my husband and I would rarely go out for a meal (being skint) but when we did, we were on edge the whole time in case the kids made a noise, dropped something, spoke too loudly, etc. if someone had approached me like this I would probably have burst into tears. It's easy to say that the tot should have been taken outside, but that might have made the other kids make a scene, or made the tot even more hysterical. There are issues that, as bystanders, we have no idea about. Let's not even mention the possibility of autism/aspergers, etc. As parents we are often left out in the cold, shunned by respectable society who like kids to be seen and not heard. I would like to hear the parents' pov on this. Cause I bet there is so much more to this story.

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John Dough
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

None of this changes that if a child is screaming it needs to be taken outside. Period.

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Katerina Huskova
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh I LOVE childless youngsters to give me lessons about parenting 😎 I see problems on both sides - I only take kids to a restaurant 1.if they know how to behave (but it's ME, the parent, who has to teach them) 2.if there's a place for kids to play = they are welcome there...on the other hand the young lady is like "It's MY MONEY and you all has to should up a serve me..." like you can buy anything. Bit in general much ado about nothing 🤷🏻‍♀️ the young lady is a happy person if her biggest problem in her life is one crying baby in a restaurant 🙃

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littlesaresare
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh I LOVE assholes with children to give me lessons about consideration. Because everyone knows that popping out a baby makes you the queen of the universe, and gives you the right to treat everyone around you like s**t, and expect everyone else to ask how high when you scream at them to jump. You are the happy person if the biggest problem in your life is complaining that strangers don't want to tolerate your entitled bullshit. 🙃

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ebook ab
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I always wonder if its not mother with crying baby, but giant, agresive guy would you act the same?

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Oogiebogieaugiedaddy
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Take it from me I had one child. Period! I knew being a mother was not for me. You cannot be the kids only care giver because you will loose your mind. My son had all grand parents alive! I left my husband after 5.5 years because he thought women should be subservient and he gave me the crabs. I told my MIL I wanted them to be in my sons life and she said "I pray for the day your son hurts as bad as you hurt my son." If I I never see xxxxx you won't step one foot on my property. Well bitch got her wish as my son shot him self from the rejection and survived. She buried her son at 52. Watch what you pray for!!!!! My parents never did one thing with my son either.

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John Dough
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What did this r/thathappened story have to do with the article exactly?

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Vuun
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This person does come off as kind of an AH. Not for asking politely after 10 minutes of wailing (I'm sceptical about both these points) but little things like referring to the child as 'it'. Also, a 2-year-old had a meltdown "for no fathomable reason". They do that you know. And the only way to prevent that is bad parenting, not good parenting.

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lara
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would have written a note to the mother and said "Thank you for bringing that child to the restaurant tonight. I was considering having another child, but no longer. "

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chrissy goodman
Community Member
2 years ago

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i used to b a nanny for a friends child. her daughter was 2 at the time and could occassionally b difficult i would usually take her to a pizza restaurant down the street id get the stroller and id walk there. whenever she acted up id instantly go outside holding her and id tell her that she wont get her pizza treat if she keeps screaming she would then calm down wed go back in and id give her a coloring book or something from "christie's bag of distractions" worked every time. children dont understand the concept of waiting for food. these parents were inconsiderate for letting their child carry on and it also wasnt right for the staff to ignore it for as long as they did. ive also worked in the restaurant business and anytime id see this where the parents just let it happen i stopped wat i was doing and either asked if they could take the child outside to calm them down or id say excuse me to the parents and ask the child if they wanted some crayons and a coloring book (i brought them with me bc of my previous nanny job...u need distractions) about 80% of the time the kid calms down wen i asked them instead of talking to the parents. about 30% of the time parents would listen to me and take their child outside. guess which option i went with 100% of the time after having a ton of parents tell me to shut up or say "dont tell me wat to do ur just a waitress". i say NTA bc ive been scoffed at, told to shut up, treated like dirt and yelled at by parents who think their child screaming is perfectly fine all bc they r a child. i even witnessed a chain reaction a few times. one kid started screaming another started crying then another started crying that day we had ppl without kids complain, leave before ordering or take their food to go. those i could do nothing about and my co workers never said a thing i was the only one to ever speak up for the other customers. so for anyone saying it the restaurant job i can tell u dont rely on the staff to do something cuz they wont even if u ask chances r they will say the child is disturbing other customers and to calm them down but thats it. also parents dont always listen even if its the manager. the restaurant i worked at the owner had to come over to a table once and it got to the point where the owner said that he wouldnt allow them to come back if they didnt respect the other customers (one of the families that treated me like i was below them and just dirt btw) the family didnt even listen to him they told him to go away. they were told to leave and wen the owner had to ask twice he said he would have his staff take them out of the restaurant and that made them get up and leave. in case i didnt mention this was a high end steak house i worked at but we also considered it a family restaurant bc we did have a childrens menu but still this wasnt like an outback steak house or place like that it was a high end family owned steak house. once i was on disability and couldnt work i actually went there a few times and the 5th time i went i noticed the menu changed there was no more kids menu. i went into the back to see the owner and asked y he said "since u left ive had to deal with every child complaint bc no matter how many times i tell the staff to do something about it they dont" wen i worked there there was always at least 1 kid now none at all the oldest kid ive seen there is around 8 or 10 but thats rare. that one family did try to go back a few times wen i still worked there too which gave me the impression that they were very entitled ppl and they were better then everyone else and rules didnt apply to them....they were stopped every time. they tried to sue too but it failed bc of how many times they were politely asked to either calm down the child or leave by several staff members including the manager and owner. i wish smartphones were around wen i worked there bc someone wouldve definitely filmed and posted it and i wouldve gladly done a follow up video lol.

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Еленица Георгиева-Иванова
2 years ago

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I'm siding with the parents on this one. I believe the whole story is bias. First let's address the point that having a child is the parent's choice. Ok it is. It is also OP's choice to go to a restaurant that allowes children to be there. They could leave if the noise is disturbing them. You say OP paid for the meal? So did the parents, should they let their meal get cold instead of eating it? Well if the parents didn't want to deal with their kids why bring them? As a parent I know in some cases it is impossible to get a baby sitter... For years at a time. Are the parents not human beings? You say OP deserves a nice meal, and the parents don't? So, ok take your kid, but if it is screaming take care of it... Well do you know why the kid is screaming? The parents are the only ones that might know, maybe the kid is teething... It was screaming for 10 minutes? And the parents did nothing? Doubt it. Just because OP didn't notice or underatand that the parents were indeed trying to calm the child does not mean they didn't. Take the kid outside? Maybe it was cold, maybe it was raining. There are many factors that go in these parent's decision to let their child be noisy in a public place and none of them is for the sake of annoying everybody else present. Kids are unpredictable, loud and difficult. That is no reason to keep them away from society or to punish the parents.

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Just saying
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes, kids are unpredicatble, loud and difficult (I have kids). Therefore during these years you don't take them to restaurants where it is inappropriate to have unpredictable, loud and difficult people. You suck it up and go to McDonalds for the five years or so it takes for your toddlers to learn how to behave. Then you gradually introduce them to more grown up places, making sure they learn how to behave, until you can finally take your fully formed and delightfully behaved 18 year old to the Ivy.

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Linny H
Community Member
2 years ago

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I think that the poster was the a** and agree that she should have asked a manager to intervene. Or just handled a small inconvenience like an adult. I used to take my kid outside if were acting up, shame on the mom for lacking that consideration for other patrons. Also, I doubt it was a straight ten minutes of shrieking. Just seems that way.

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GratefulForPandas
Community Member
2 years ago

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While in this case maybe the parents should have taken the child out, I also think in some places people expect children to behave like adults and don't welcome them. Children are part of society and essentially banning them for not always being silent is wrong too. Also, It can be really hard to be a parent and enjoy a restaurant every once in a while.... you don't know what they've put up with the rest of the day.

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NgatiDreadz
Community Member
2 years ago

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YTA kids will be kids you don't know if that kid has problems or not you don't know the background to any of that families problems people always thinking about "me and my time and money" selfish pricks! The last time I checked you taste with your mouth not your ears don't care if I cop the hate

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Caligirl20
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The screaming of a child can induce all kinds of stress in people that can put them off of food. It is the parents job to remove the child and take them to a quiet place to help them calm down. It's the only way a child is going to learn how to behave properly in a restaurant. I go out to dinner with my husband to get a break from my kids, not listen to someone else's screaming child fir 10+ minutes. I don't mind kids laughing and squealing or them yelling every so often. But I don't want to spend $20 a person and listen to a kid scream non stop.

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Patti
Community Member
2 years ago

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What a bithch. I can't wait until she has children. The universe will get you. Hahahahaha

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Missy Moo Moo
Community Member
2 years ago

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One thing that has helped me navigate through life... you can't control what other people do, you can only control your own actions. If I couldn't handle the noise, I would get my food to go and leave. Stop policing others, life is so much easier

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Hans
Community Member
2 years ago

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I find it shocking that this discussion is about approaching the parents or not for the sake of eating undisturbed. If you read the original reddit, people write stuff like parents need to "control" their children and "remove" them if they disturb, as if they were mindless robots. If this story is true as it is told by the OP, the real question is whether it is not justified to approach parents who leave a child cry for 10 minutes while continueing to eat for the sake of the poor child. Children do not cry for no reasons. I do not understand how anyone would rather be disturbed by a crying toddler than empathic with him or her! Honestly, I would have offered the parents help, risking that they take this as an offence.

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Vorknkx
Community Member
2 years ago

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One detail that everyone seems to be missing - we don't know WHY the child was "shrieking" and assume it's just a tantrum. What if there was some serious and legit reason for the "shrieking"?

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Joey Jo Jo Shabadoo
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Then the child should have been taken home or to the hospital if there was something "serious and legit" reason for the shrieking. Do you continue eating your pasta when somebody at your table is screaming in pain and fear?

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Caligirl20
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The person asking the parents to remove the screaming kid is the a**h**e? Because they aren't. Common courtesy is to remove the screaming child until they calmed down. I don't mind rambunctious children messing around in their booths/seats or talking to me. But I am going out to eat to have a peaceful dinner away from my own loud kids. Date nights are rare for my husband and I. I don't want to go drop $50/$60 dollars just to listen to a child scream for half of my meal. I could have stayed home and listened to my teens argue for free.

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Claire Nichols
Community Member
2 years ago

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The child may have been special needs. We should all as human beings be understanding of others. Bet if it was your child you would think differently! I can almost guarantee, this, THIS!!!!. Was your child at some point!! Please be respectful and understanding! Especially when children are involved!!!!

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Claire Nichols
Community Member
2 years ago

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YTA! Are you kidding me?? Do you have any idea if the child has special needs? Bet if your children were behaving like that it would be different!! Children behaving badly, without parental supervision is not a good thing. However you have no idea what the situation is! Total AH!!

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lenka
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

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I am a parent and have lost count of the times I have taken one of my children out restaurants/movies/theatres/galleries and museums etc so they are not disruptive to other people. Should the parents have taken the child out? Probably yes. Are you still an arsehole? Probably yes. It was a pretty d**k move to shame the parents like that when you dont know what or why the child is screaming. You demonstrated lack of grace and compassion. I hope you are never on the receiving end of such arseholery.

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