I’m asking because a lot of people go unheard in life until we forget how to really define what we want. Women especially. I think it’s just good to stop pouring ourselves empty for an ungrateful patriarchy already drunk on power. Or anyone ungrateful for that matter.
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I just want the freedom to go anywhere and define my own life, financial independence, a life purpose, a good mentor to make up for bad parents, and to maybe call my friend.
To get out of bed today with no back spasms. Hurt it over the weekend and there's way bigger stuff I'd wish for myself and the world any other time but man I just want this part over! 😅
Try laying on the kitchen floor with your arms and legs slightly spread and relaxed for fifteen minutes. Let the vertebrae crack themselves for a few minutes. If there’s no improvement over a few days, you might have a slipped vertebral disc. Whatever you do, DON’T POP YOUR BACK STANDING UP. Just in case.You don’t want sudden movement to cause further damage if that’s the case. May your back get well soon.
No one asking anything of me. No expectations. No responsibilities. No judgements. Just a dark room with a bed and no windows or doors where I can sleep. I just want to turn off for awhile. I’d like to run far away into a night that never ends until I’m all alone some place where I can fall apart. Sounds whiney and needy but it is what it is.
I hear you. I really do. Falling apart is the first step to coming back together, so you can figure out where the pieces go, when you need God to help you be whole again. Holding it together for too long is like holding a broken cup together. You’re getting cut, when instead you need and deserve someone to care and help you just lay it out on the table, and help to make comforting sense of it. And give you as much space or warmth as you need. You’re not whiny at all, you’re human. You deserve to have people there for you, because you’d do it for them. You sound like the kind of person who’s always being considerate, but often struggles to see that it’s your turn to be considered, seeing it as an inconvenience to others, rather than a sign of your equality. It’s not your fault. Whatever’s hurting you, it’s time to ask for the favor to be returned. You are NOT the A-hole if you do, under any circumstances. 😭
To cope with what's happening in my head. With so much false information about mental health floating around the internet and being a literal child it scares me knowing how bad it might be. And if it's not a big issue, that I've been faking an issue so major.
I hate hearing the parts argue, I hate 'switches' if that's even what's happening, I hate that it might actually be happening because a therapist recognised them and talked to them and. Just. I'm scared. I'm a stupid little kid and I'm scared
You’re not stupid at all. Your dignity has been disregarded so many times by life, and perhaps by people. I know what you’re going through is terrifying. I also have this condition. The only way to make peace with yourself is to challenge every negative voice that tries to call you worthless, stupid, or anything less than a worthy human. It’ll take years of challenging all that self hatred, of letting all those bottled up emotions free. But it’s worth it. Every lie you crush makes the load lighter. Each alter has a story, and feels as hurt as you. They won’t always make peace with you off the bat, but they are you’re brain’s way of encouraging self-compassion when you feel alone. If you can, take a day off each week to relax and self care. You don’t want to fight your trauma when exhausted. I hope that advice helps you. You deserved way better out of life. I’m so sorry. Children should never be traumatized. Nothing can ever make me believe you are to blame.
