“Am I The Jerk For Watching And Not Doing Anything While My Wife Was Being Kicked Out Of My Company?”
Whether we have personal experience with it or not, we all know that being in a controlling relationship is a nightmare. Unfortunately, despite the fact that nearly 40% of women have experienced coercive control from a partner, some still feel entitled to track their partner’s every move and look for reasons to pick fights. 3 weeks ago, Reddit user throwa37736 shared the story of how his wife barged into his place of work and ended up having to be removed by security for being disruptive. Below, you can read the full story, as well as some of the responses from other readers, and decide how you feel about the situation. Let us know what you think in the comments, and then if you’re looking for another Bored Panda piece featuring relationship red flags, look no further than right here.
3 weeks ago, one husband shared on Reddit how his wife barged into a meeting at his office just to yell at him for turning his phone off
Image credits: RODNAE Productions (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Vanessa Garcia (not the actual photo)
The wife caused such a scene that security had to escort her out of the building
Each couple has their own way of handling disputes; some people immediately address issues head-on, while others want to take time to process before deciding how to handle a conflict. Whether you and your partner stay calm or become emotionally charged in arguments, it’s important to understand that there is a time and a place for those conversations. Usually, fighting in public makes a situation worse, as it may add layers of embarrassment, humiliation and resentment. According to clinical psychologist Dr. Joshua Klapow, “There is a fine line between disagreements in public — which can be healthy — and arguments or fights in public, which can ruin a relationship. The key is keeping the disagreement from escalating into the argument and keeping an argument from escalating into a fight.”
In the case of this particular story, the wife didn’t even allow her husband the opportunity to have a productive conversation. The way she handled this situation was toxic, as she violated a boundary and refused to wait to have a calm conversation when he got home. And this hostile confrontation is a huge sign that this wife does not know how to maintain a healthy relationship. According to Sabrina Romanoff, a therapist in New York City, “In a healthy relationship, partners have honest and non-hostile communication. While they may not be eye-to-eye on everything, they view disagreements as information about their partner, not a fight to be won.”
Sadly, people often assume that men are the only ones who exhibit toxic behavior and signs of abuse in relationships, but that’s not the case at all. Women are equally as capable of being manipulative and controlling in relationships. For a relationship to be functioning healthily, both parties must agree to treat one another with respect, understanding and trust, things that were clearly lacking here. We’re glad that the husband did not end up losing his job, but hopefully this eye-opening incident was a turning point for him. Let us know how you feel about this situation down below and how you would respond if you were in the husband’s shoes.
Readers have unanimously told the husband that he did nothing wrong and warned him about the signs of abuse
510Kviews
Share on Facebook
She should definitely stay with her mom. Do not let her back in the home. She’s abusive and you should file a restraining order.
Swap the gender roles, and you would have already called the cops and had a restraining order set against any dude who did shït like this. NTA and wife is abusive with zero respect for your boundaries. Run or get therapy.
Abuse. Divorce. Also weird, I never worked in an office that didn't have keycards and /or reception. No one from outside could have barged into a meeting room.
In smaller companies is not that unusual. At least it wasn;t in the early 2K when I still worked corporate. Also in some companies if a spouse shows up, everyone assumes they are there for a good reason, not yell at their employee.
Load More Replies...
First off, this person is being abused. Secondly, if he doesn't start documenting everything, I have no doubt that she will turn this around on him and say that he is abusing her. Thirdly, most people turn their phone off at work so that they don't disturb anyone. And the most important thing, what in the world is wrong with this woman? You don't go into your spouse's place of work and have a tantrum and then be surprised you got thrown out. That's ridiculous. He needs to go to the police and get a restraining order right now and then start divorce proceedings.
Also, you don't travel to someone's work, get in, find them in a meeting because you "just lost your temper". This isn't someone yelling because they finally got too frustrated, this is someone who had to make a long and calculated trip while not showing enough anger to be apprehended before barging in to a meeting that I doubt was happening next to an external door. The good news is that it sounds like the company is not victim (blaming and would likely be supportive or at least not punitive) if the employee came forward asking for help.
Load More Replies...
He thinks being screamed at for not doing a few dishes or filling up the gas tank is normal. So sad. It’s not normal. The wife is abusive whether it’s due to mental health issues or not. Hope a resolution is found for this man. He should not have to continue living like this.
For some reason, men seem to marry women who remind them of their mothers. Perhaps he thinks it's normal because his mother was the same way.
Load More Replies...
Agree, but moreover, there was no understanding that she embarrassed him multiple times previously.
Load More Replies...
I once called my husband's work and made him cancel a meeting he had personally scheduled... because my water had just broke and I needed him to drive me to the hospital to give birth. That is the one time in 19 years I've ever demanded his work drag him out of something for me. Well, I didn't even demand. I just said, "this is so-and-so's wife. My water just broke. I need someone to find him and tell him." Even in that situation, I want about to demand anything. If I can wait 10 minutes in that case while my husband calls me back, this crazy woman can definitely wait until her husband gets home to air her complaints.
This illustrates the double standards at play in society. Many people just can't understand that men can suffer physical, emotional and financial abuse. The Depp/Heard trial is another example. Depp won his case, but the newspapers in the UK have totally disregarded this fact, and continue to demonise him. It's insulting to the jury - they saw all the evidence and reached their verdict.
Red Flag! Please seek out professional help, record everything she does, protect yourself and your assets. Hire a lawyer, make sure to inform all relationships you have that she might be coming in like a ball of fire. Make sure you handle this. This is a behaviour where the "I love you, you're my wife" the best action is to divorce and let her go. Maybe get her professional help in a facility. Please seek help, if she blames you now imagine what she will tell if she doesn't get access to your work, you might just as well become accused of abuse and violence yourself!!!! Divorce is a minimum response after these repeated actions, if love is still blinding - record everything, or you might just as well soon be labelled wife beated, abuser. Everytime I hear about women or men behaving like this, I want to adopt and give you all a safe place. You deserve better in life than putting yourself in line of fire to protect someone who is meant to support and celebrate you with love and respect.
That's not a red flag. That's just the actual thing that a red flag might warn you in advance about. This along is divorceable offense, not a red flag.
Load More Replies...
Therapy!!! if it were a man he'd be in jail. I had the same problem with an ex. I worked as a doorman at a club, and she would come in and if she saw me talking with other girls, part of my job, she would attack them. Police said the same sh**, talk to her, she jealous because she loves you. After several episodes of rage and violence I tried to leave, she pulled a kitchen knife on me. I still have a cut on my finger from disarming her. She reported me for battery and guess what, they came to my house and handcuffed me and took me down the station. The fact was I had been working from 10 pm till 5 am in one club and then in a after hour till 11 am and been speaking with plain clothes police at the afterhours (they came a lot) got me out of trouble. That and the fact that I had to fingers bandaged up. Even then they said that even though the rent was in my name she had the right to stay. In the end I had to leave because things got worse and for my own sanity and the risk of losing it.
Load More Replies...
NTA that's abuse. You need to ask HR for help and file for a divorce. I doubt she will change
Poor OP. Due to some shitty things my mom did I became a massive hothead and only just started cooling down. Why am I saying this? Because I can tell you that girl is being ABUSIVE, not a HOT HEAD. Let her stay with her mommy, OP can take the time to relax and fill in divorce papers!
Dude, it’s time for a divorce. The whole “Look what you made me do” thing is a textbook example of abusive behavior.
My husband works for a marketing and web development company. I will go see him at work from time to time, but never to argue with him. There are times when I call him upset...like the time he forgot to update his payment information for our domain and our email accounts were cancelled losing tons of info...but I would not storm into his work or make a scene in public about it. No one else's business and not worth losing his job over. I would go to HR like one person said. Make sure your butt is covered and get out of that relationship. Get documentation from your work on her behaviors...that way you won't lose out on the divorce.
Lawyers have a saying: “what begins in bed ends in court.”
Load More Replies...
I just recently came out of something similar. It was actually law enforcement that talked her into getting checked out at a mental health hospital (it got really bad in my case) she ended up being diagnosed with severe BPD. If he can somehow convince his wife to see a mental health clinic, it might be more than just being a hot head, there could be some serious underlining issues. Left untreated they don't go away, they only get worse and worse and worse.
At first, before I read this article, I thought "Oh, he was in a Zoom meeting and his wife came in and started yelling at him without realizing he was in an online meeting." That's much more understandable than reality.
I assumed it was like that too or they worked in the same company. This story seems over the top to me but if it is exactly as stated and he had not been caught cheating on her or something like that then she probably has mental illness and needs help! Intervention time or trial separation if it is as he described because something is not ok. Brain tumor? Roid rage? Feels like some back story or crucial detail is missing
Load More Replies...
My second marriage was turning into this. Move your stuff into a storage facility and get a different place to live, this could escalate. In my second marriage, I made sure I fell asleep last.
Wow.... You need to see a divorce lawyer immediately. I agree with people on here who say she's abusive. It may not be physical abuse but it's still abuse. She isn't just a hot head, she stormed into *your* important meeting at work and *she* proceeded to caused a scene. How could you possibly be married to someone like that? It's scary. Get out as soon as you can.
I don't understand why the OP's wife thinks that is normal behavior and also blame the OP for how she reacts. As a lot of people have said, he is being abused and is finding it hard to accept it.
I would love to see her reaction if he were to show up at her workplace acting like that. But he better takes a few friends/colleges with him to explain to the police - because if a man acts like that, usually the police is called.
Unfortunately, there is a very big chance of the OP apologizing to this woman and asking her to come back. Abuse handicaps people in lots of different ways. Hopefully, he has enough strength and clarity to get away from her before it's too late.
I feel so sorry for OP. She is abusive with serious anger management issues, not a hot head. While I feel too many couples get divorced so easily now a days instead of what working out the problems, nor should someone say to someone else leave and get a divorce immediately. I’m sorry to say that this is what OP should do. As many have said, she will only escalate especially since she can’t see her wrong doing. I wish him well and hope he is ok.
You're still married to her why? Had this been the other way around, the guy would be in jail for a list of crimes,ade up or otherwise. She will show up at your job again and you will be unemployed. Divorce her now.
I understand that not every moment is like this. (Also the sign of an abuser.)Not every day is this bad. (Also the sign of an abuser)She can be sweet and kind and loving. She's sorry afterwards. (Typical of an abuser) That's what makes it so hard. Blaming you for being abused is just another sign of an abuser. Getting help for yourself would be the biggest sign of strength you could show. It isn't weakness to need to get out and get help. It IS a sad and terrible thing to let someone literally love you to death. And at this point she is more than halfway there. If she manages to remove your financial independence you'll be doomed. You can't fall down this rabbit hole any farther. Leaving doesn't say anything at all about her. It just says that You choose life. I wish you Every Good Thing.
Sounds like a personality disorder from the limited info provided. My ex used to call, call my bosses, show up places, scream about the (¼ full) trash not being taken out, and so many other inappropriate behaviors. We split when she decided unilaterally to move 3000 miles away. She's been making me and our child pay for it for the last 15 years. I hope OP runs and never looks back.
Oh hell no, this is not acceptable behavior in any way. This woman is abusive and controlling. She is trying to get him fired, I guarantee it! He needs to get a divorce ASAP. Therapy won't help, abusers never change or get better.
I wonder if this girls mom takes her side as in the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.. this guy is an idiot. I mean he compares him not doing the dishes and not refilling her gas tank as if it's equal to her abusing him.
Change the locks, get a restraining order and file for divorce, but stay in an apartment or motel. She sounds crazy enough to buy a gun.
Like so many others here, how is this even a question of being the AH??? Yes, of course I mean he's NOT!
I really hope you haven't had kids with her. That is not someone that should be the mother of your children.
My advice (yes, I know it's a Reddit story and probably not true, but still...): Find a good divorce lawyer and don't waste time about it. You know that's what she's doing. Throw the first punch.
The part I'm not getting is that OP is getting warnings from his employers. Why? He is not responsible for his spouse's behaviour.
Typical employer to act as though in this situation OP has any power to control this crazy person.
Load More Replies...
Starts off by pointing out why she's literally a terrible person... Also him: still married to her for 2 years.... Like mate you need to run you're in danger mentally and emotionally
I hope this guy reads these messages and gets out of that marriage. She has serious issues - perhaps and undiagnosed mental disorder but he can’t let her drag his life down with her. I know. The bosses should not be blaming him and shouldn’t be sexist. If he was a woman they would recognize the signs of an abusive relationship. Companies usually have HR departments with access to employee assistance programs.
I’m not sure there’s any way at all to save that marriage. It seems to hurt not just OP but everyone that comes into contact with it. I sort of hope OP kind of cuts his losses and disengages.
Op needs therapy to understand why he puts up with this abuse. And why he justifies her behaviour. His language also sounds like he is blaming himself for her anger..."l didn t clean the bathroom after a shower or filll her gas tank after l used her car" He needs help to deal with this so he can move on to more healthy relationships.
Ok. Divorce restraining order and kick her out. Then get help. I don't know if you have an employee assistance program, but you need counseling and some assistance.
Dude is definitely guilty for letting her walk all over him at house. They don't work like we hope, man... We think "okay imma give you the pass in the house, but not at work" no it doesn't work like that, you let them walk all over you at your house, means you're training them to do it everywhere. With that said, nobody can blame you for mistakenly married an abuser. If we learn anything from johnny depp's case: divorce, now. I wish him the very best of luck.
Oh dear, divorce this psycho witch. It's only going to get worse and she will get you fired one day. Divorce her now before you have kids.
Again, we have the classic signs of narcissism. There are a LOT of them out there. She is trying to control everything you do 24/7, and has no concept of decent behaviour if you don't jump to her wishes. The fact that she actually saw nothing wrong with barging in to a business meeting and yelling at you shows she has no boundaries - at all. And then - she gaslights you - telling you it's YOUR fault that this happened. I'm sorry my friend, but you need to see a good lawyer. And I can tell you now that when she realizes that you are going for divorce, she will use every sexual wile she has to bring you back into her clutches. That's probably how she got you in the first place, isn't it? That's how narcissists function. Don't fall for it. Don't let her in the same room as you or she'll find a way to sway you. RUN - to the nearest lawyer's office.
This will only escalate because she has no remorse and takes no responsibility for the impact of her actions. NTA, yo-yos victim of Domestic Violence! Get help or get away, just don’t ignore it because it won’t change without action.
If he stays, this woman is going to eventually murder him, guaranteed. He seriously needs to get a divorce and a restraining order. Not only is she abusive and controlling, she is absolutely unhinged and unreasonable, displaying an escalation in abusive behaviour. I wish there were an update, preferably stating he had left her and had taken some protective actions for his own safety.
🤣 he likes it, that's why he married her. He's not going to divorce her. If he loses his job, that's his problem.
Put your foot down man!! She's your woman not your man or your boss. She acts like this because you allow it. I have watched this happen for years over my life with my own mother and her husbands. Yes "husbands"! Two outcomes are going to happen either it will escalate and you will get tired of it and tell her bye or she's going to wise up and realize you aren't taking her c**p anymore. Then make it clear when you do that's this is how it's going to be. Your not a victim unless you make yourself a victim and you can't be abused unless you give opportunity for abuse! True love is not about bowing over it's about compromise and understanding from both partner's respecting each other and caring about each other 100%. Treat her with patience and love but do it with a spine. Don't give her ultimatums but open opportunities and stand your ground!!
That is abuse. You need to get therapy, you might not agree with this one yet, but you need it. Abuse victims tend to blame themselves when they are not at fault.
I was admin manager/finance manager at a company, and did the payroll. I would get weekly calls from the wife of one of the guys there. She would always try and order me to give her information etc. I never did, as being marriage doesn't mean you own the other persons identity. The guys job was never at risk, as we just felt sorry for him. She was told not to call the office again and he was asked to reinforce this. If she did, I would just hang up on her. LOL
Your wife has some mental health issues! There is nothing you can do to stop this behavior. She can't even stop this behavior! You are the victim of domestic abuse. It does not get better, it only gets worse. I hope you have the strength to get out, but at least don't bring children into it. My heart breaks thinking of a child being subjected to that.
She runs roughshod over any boundaries while you seem to take inventory of everything you do to make sure it's perfect. And she makes herself out to be the victim after this unbelievable violation. She seems like a narcissist and/or BPD--in any case, super controlling with anger management issues. You should have excused yourself and helped security escort her out because you are responsibke for making sure that someone connected to you doesn't interfere with your place of employmemt. If you can't do that, you deserve to be fired. Man up, set sone boundaries, have confidence in those boundaries and stick to them. Oh, and please get out of this marriage.
WTF???? This kind of treatment is crazy! Say "adios" and get some counseling
What makes me angry is that if a man was doing this to his wife, the job would likely try to help the wife with domestic violence services rather than trying to fire her. Yet reverse the genders and this guy's job is at stake.
Divorce lawyer is who you should contact. She doesn't accept responsibility for her actions so it will continue & get worse. You did the right thing & your not an a*****e. You are being abused. She is verbally & mentally abusive, controlling, & she will never admit any fault with her behavior. You need to do everything to get away from her because this will get worse. I'm sorry honey, but she is abusive to you. No adult should ever act like that especially at a work place. Get away from her & cut all ties with her. Good luck.
NTA! Your wife has anger issues that should've been dealt with a LONG TIME AGO!! When you finally called her out on it, telling her that her barging into the office, during an IMPORTANT meeting with POTENTIAL CLIENTS, to yell at you for something inconsequential, nearly cost YOU your JOB, she starts crying and making it about HER!! While she's at her mom's, consult a lawyer about your options. They may recommend to pursue marriage counseling (she could benefit from personal counseling herself to get to the root of her anger issues and find ways to manage her anger instead of taking it out on you). If you have tried counseling and it didn't work, or she refused to go with you, then seek a divorce. Also, file a restraining order and change the locks (also get a Ring doorbell and security cameras). If you haven't already done so, DOCUMENT the times she had verbally attacked you; that can help you in a court of law if SHE decides to sue you.
When somebody's behavior is over the top I would recommend her getting an MRI of her brain and see if she has cerebral spinal fluid that is out of place .. she might have taken a blow to the head or been dropped as a baby that causes this wild behavior .. this is basically what football players have... Of course you can affect any of us with head injuries.. not to defend her but she might not be able to help it and I wonder if she has a frontal lobe injury which governs our behavior...
If this guy hasn't already filed for divorce, he's an idiot. Probably not since he deleted his account
I would definitely do some late-spring cleaning and pack everything that's hers and have it shipped to her Mom's house, along with restraining order and divorce papers. Actually, a storage unit for the first month can be as low as $20, much less than shipping. After all, she's cost you enough already. You cannot fix her. She's got some serious mental health issues. You are not obligated to stay with anybody that treats you this way. It's not like sticking by her through chemo or something. It will take years for her to work through whatever made her into an a*****e and until she does, she's going to continue treating you this way. Don't be a martyr. Either leave her or give her an ultimatum: she either starts intensive therapy or it's over. That's an option too if you're just not ready to call it quits.. yet. I do wonder, though: is she this way with everyone else, too? Did it start suddenly or gradually get progressively worse over time? Curious.
" Said that I'm the one creating these situations and can't blame here for how she reacts" that's gaslighting at it's finest. You've got a psycho, bro. Granted, this is only one side of the story, but it sounds like she needs to be cut loose and get he needs a restraining order.
Want to know how many times my wife has yelled at me over the past 6 years we've been together? Zero times, we don't fight ever, a few light arguments here and there (maybe 2 or 3 times a year), but never something so disrespectful and we've been through a lot together. If anyone says fighting is normal in a relationship, they are full of s**t, they are searching for a justification for their inability to talk to each other and work things out peacefully. It can be done and there are non-abusive people out there who are much more worth this person's time. Don't fall victim to people who act like this, they don't deserve to be with anyone.
Whew! If this man don't divorce that she-witch harpy and ASAP??? If the JD-AH trial taught us anything, its that women like the OP's spouse and AH are massively controlling narcissists who often use these types of 'guerilla' tactics on men and then when confronted, try to use their flying monkeys i.e. family, friends, etc to gaslight you. Sir...RUNNNNNN! Get to the best divorce attorney you can find and while you're at it, change the locks, close all joint bank accounts where your funds are or simply transfer out all of your funds, and especially GET A RESTRAINING ORDER! Be prepared for the She-Beast's Mom and family members to descend, wanting to plead her case. If and when they do, tell them to STFU and get that girl some help because you're not her verbal punching bag. You deserve better, man. Wishing you luck and most importantly, Peace of Mind.🙏🏾
You need to go to counseling to find out why you are allowing this kind of behavior...& learn how to stop it or get out of the marriage. Your wife needs to go to counseling for anger management & being abusive.
I dunno. It sounds like you ought to protect your own emotions, and that either she’s controlling, or maybe just anxious with abandonment or trust issues. If she’s willing to go to counseling, I’m all for it. If it crosses the line into abuse, get far away forever. Just because you’re a man, doesn’t make you any lesser for having the need to protect yourself emotionally. You are not a coward or wuss. You’re asserting your own dignity. You have my best wishes.
I get that you’re offering to support here and that is kind, but it’s important to note that she has already “crossed the line into abuse”. The behaviour he describes is definitely abusive, no question.
Load More Replies...
People asking if they're the a*****e for stuff like this are just seeking attending online. I mean come on...
Yeah if it sounds too good to be true it often is. That's why I think there has to be more he left out. I mean it does happen but more in isolation and he is not isolated. Reactive abuse is a real thing and I wonder if this particular incident was a set up or if it is not then why has he not done more to get counselling? They are so young still. You don't put up with this kind of stuff usually u til much later and when kids are in the picture and it is gradual. It doesn't mean she doesn't need help but if it happens after particular triggers or he cheated and she has sort of lost it then the story is more relatable/ believable.
Load More Replies...
As long as you aren't gaslighting her or manipulating her in a way that she is going off the deep end acting this way, then definitely protect yourself. Do check to make certain you aren't a source of her issues. This goes both ways for both gender roles.
The fact you have to ask on a forum if you did something wrong speaks volumes. Your wife's behavior is wrong on so many levels and you allowing such disrespect and abuse shows signs of low self esteem and codependency. Please seek a therapist and encourage her to do the same. She needs to stay at her mother's until you get some help.
She’s a bit young for you. Maybe you should marry someone closer to your age. 26 year olds are not as mature as 33 year olds and it sounds like she’s especially immature even for a woman her age. It’s very hard to walk away but in the long run, you’ll be glad you did. She’ll probably repeat this bad behavior wherever you work so beware….I agree with Mrs. Glass — change the locks!! And get her some mental help. She might have some kind of personality issue or mental imbalance.. It’s not normal behavior your describing.
What changes are you waiting to see from her. Because they are not happening. Do the next guy who will date her a favor and wake her up by closing the door behind you. So she can grow the F up. Do not waste any more time on her dude. And please have some standards with your next girl, look beyond the pretty face.
It sounds like the wife might have Histrionic Personality Disorder. If she doesn't get help and I doubt she will, he needs to divorce her. If she's this bad about small things, what will she do when they have kids, or a disagreement within their families. He deserves better.
There’s no need to diagnose strangers on the internet here - it’s not helpful or relevant and reinforces mental health stigma. All we know for sure is that her behaviour is abusive, and abuse is always unacceptable even if there’s a clinical issue behind it. I agree he deserves better and hope he can find the strength and support to do what’s best for himself and escape the abuse.
Load More Replies...
NTA in this situation but yes, YTA, because you married this crazy woman 😀 Or 2 years ago she was a total different type of person? My friend married exactly this type of woman, few years ago, never saw him again unfortunately, but he did the choice, as you.
He musta been some kinda wimp for tolerating that in the first place. She's an abusive mentally ill b***h who's so unhappy, she has to take it out in everyone else. She should be working in a job herself. Does she not do anything worthy with her time. He needs to grow some balls, and divorce her, but watch out! She's definitely the psycho stalker type who'll take revenge. She should be in a looney bin.
There is more to the story and why. If he loves her he has a obligation to work it out . The institution of marriage has been destroyed. I won't say by who or what people.
Oh f**k off. No one, not a single person has an "obligation" to stay in an abusive relationship. Puritanical assholes like you are why people stay with their abusers. Shame on you.
Load More Replies... I hope he divorces her, gets a fantastic lawyer and a vasectomy, ONLY because it wouldn't surprise me if she shows up pregnant and tries to claim it's his. IF I understand correctly, vasectomy's can be reversed. This may be harsh to some, she needs to be locked up and medicated.
DNA tests exist. Not sure why you think a vasectomy is part of the solution here.
Load More Replies... Was she tracking his phone because he had been cheating on her? I'm sorry but he sounds too good to be true. Something is missing. He says he doesn't follow through and she gets irate but this sounds a lot like what happened to my friend whose husband was having a daliancewith a coworker and stopped but the difference is my friend had been married 15 years and was good friends with the boss so she went to him with the husband and asked that the woman, who was absolutely the pursuer( receipts)was moved to another team. But later, the other lady was doing things to her personally, and her kids, etc..the woman had done something like this before with a new employee who quickly quit. It was too much so my friend, at her wits end, went down and confronted the lady for all to see and know. Turns out the boss was upset a bit, then a third man came out that he was being harassed by her, so it was good. He came forward because the scene made him see he wasn't going to get in trouble. Maybe there's more to this story, too. If OPs wife is paranoid then why? Is it illness or is he gaslighting us with half truths? I can hear the other woman telling such a story about my friend and her hubby who left her when she got fired
I know this may seem odd to say but I feel if a man was doing this she would be more likely to be fired. They would see her as weak, unable to manage her personal life and a liability. In this case with the man they give warnings thinking he can and will get it under control. The same belief and faith I do not feel would be gifted to a woman. Part of this variance in response could be the interpretation that the threat of a woman is less than that if a man. And potentially that we feel it is more normal to write off adult female aggression as crazy verses scary or threatening.
Are you simple??? If a man walked into a females work place and began acting like she did...5 will get you 10 he'd end up in handcuffs.
Load More Replies...
Wow! This is fiery. No hope for this couple. No chance to talk things out I guess. It's my way or the highway. Tricky. I personally would find it very hard to do this if I loved the person I married. It's only two years. Yes! I can see your point but....... I think they need to get counselling. No wonder so many divorces......Just get a new puppy is what it sounds like.
COUNSELING DOESNT FIX EVERYTHING! JFC.....some of you would likely suggest dragging a freshly murdered corpse into therapy to "help heal" the person that killed them! And its NOT a Spouse's job to be your punching bag-IN ANY FORM! She has done this c**p before and she WONT CHANGE. For the love of all things sacred, I hope the OP never takes your advice. Poor man will be in jail or worse, hoping for 'reconciliation ' with a feral wildcat.
Load More Replies... 
Please explain your thought process, I’d like to understand how you came to such a stupid conclusion.
Load More Replies...
She should definitely stay with her mom. Do not let her back in the home. She’s abusive and you should file a restraining order.
Swap the gender roles, and you would have already called the cops and had a restraining order set against any dude who did shït like this. NTA and wife is abusive with zero respect for your boundaries. Run or get therapy.
Abuse. Divorce. Also weird, I never worked in an office that didn't have keycards and /or reception. No one from outside could have barged into a meeting room.
In smaller companies is not that unusual. At least it wasn;t in the early 2K when I still worked corporate. Also in some companies if a spouse shows up, everyone assumes they are there for a good reason, not yell at their employee.
Load More Replies... First off, this person is being abused. Secondly, if he doesn't start documenting everything, I have no doubt that she will turn this around on him and say that he is abusing her. Thirdly, most people turn their phone off at work so that they don't disturb anyone. And the most important thing, what in the world is wrong with this woman? You don't go into your spouse's place of work and have a tantrum and then be surprised you got thrown out. That's ridiculous. He needs to go to the police and get a restraining order right now and then start divorce proceedings.
Also, you don't travel to someone's work, get in, find them in a meeting because you "just lost your temper". This isn't someone yelling because they finally got too frustrated, this is someone who had to make a long and calculated trip while not showing enough anger to be apprehended before barging in to a meeting that I doubt was happening next to an external door. The good news is that it sounds like the company is not victim (blaming and would likely be supportive or at least not punitive) if the employee came forward asking for help.
Load More Replies... He thinks being screamed at for not doing a few dishes or filling up the gas tank is normal. So sad. It’s not normal. The wife is abusive whether it’s due to mental health issues or not. Hope a resolution is found for this man. He should not have to continue living like this.
For some reason, men seem to marry women who remind them of their mothers. Perhaps he thinks it's normal because his mother was the same way.
Load More Replies... Agree, but moreover, there was no understanding that she embarrassed him multiple times previously.
Load More Replies... I once called my husband's work and made him cancel a meeting he had personally scheduled... because my water had just broke and I needed him to drive me to the hospital to give birth. That is the one time in 19 years I've ever demanded his work drag him out of something for me. Well, I didn't even demand. I just said, "this is so-and-so's wife. My water just broke. I need someone to find him and tell him." Even in that situation, I want about to demand anything. If I can wait 10 minutes in that case while my husband calls me back, this crazy woman can definitely wait until her husband gets home to air her complaints.
This illustrates the double standards at play in society. Many people just can't understand that men can suffer physical, emotional and financial abuse. The Depp/Heard trial is another example. Depp won his case, but the newspapers in the UK have totally disregarded this fact, and continue to demonise him. It's insulting to the jury - they saw all the evidence and reached their verdict.
Red Flag! Please seek out professional help, record everything she does, protect yourself and your assets. Hire a lawyer, make sure to inform all relationships you have that she might be coming in like a ball of fire. Make sure you handle this. This is a behaviour where the "I love you, you're my wife" the best action is to divorce and let her go. Maybe get her professional help in a facility. Please seek help, if she blames you now imagine what she will tell if she doesn't get access to your work, you might just as well become accused of abuse and violence yourself!!!! Divorce is a minimum response after these repeated actions, if love is still blinding - record everything, or you might just as well soon be labelled wife beated, abuser. Everytime I hear about women or men behaving like this, I want to adopt and give you all a safe place. You deserve better in life than putting yourself in line of fire to protect someone who is meant to support and celebrate you with love and respect.
That's not a red flag. That's just the actual thing that a red flag might warn you in advance about. This along is divorceable offense, not a red flag.
Load More Replies... Therapy!!! if it were a man he'd be in jail. I had the same problem with an ex. I worked as a doorman at a club, and she would come in and if she saw me talking with other girls, part of my job, she would attack them. Police said the same sh**, talk to her, she jealous because she loves you. After several episodes of rage and violence I tried to leave, she pulled a kitchen knife on me. I still have a cut on my finger from disarming her. She reported me for battery and guess what, they came to my house and handcuffed me and took me down the station. The fact was I had been working from 10 pm till 5 am in one club and then in a after hour till 11 am and been speaking with plain clothes police at the afterhours (they came a lot) got me out of trouble. That and the fact that I had to fingers bandaged up. Even then they said that even though the rent was in my name she had the right to stay. In the end I had to leave because things got worse and for my own sanity and the risk of losing it.
Load More Replies... NTA that's abuse. You need to ask HR for help and file for a divorce. I doubt she will change
Poor OP. Due to some shitty things my mom did I became a massive hothead and only just started cooling down. Why am I saying this? Because I can tell you that girl is being ABUSIVE, not a HOT HEAD. Let her stay with her mommy, OP can take the time to relax and fill in divorce papers!
Dude, it’s time for a divorce. The whole “Look what you made me do” thing is a textbook example of abusive behavior.
My husband works for a marketing and web development company. I will go see him at work from time to time, but never to argue with him. There are times when I call him upset...like the time he forgot to update his payment information for our domain and our email accounts were cancelled losing tons of info...but I would not storm into his work or make a scene in public about it. No one else's business and not worth losing his job over. I would go to HR like one person said. Make sure your butt is covered and get out of that relationship. Get documentation from your work on her behaviors...that way you won't lose out on the divorce.
Lawyers have a saying: “what begins in bed ends in court.”
Load More Replies... I just recently came out of something similar. It was actually law enforcement that talked her into getting checked out at a mental health hospital (it got really bad in my case) she ended up being diagnosed with severe BPD. If he can somehow convince his wife to see a mental health clinic, it might be more than just being a hot head, there could be some serious underlining issues. Left untreated they don't go away, they only get worse and worse and worse.
At first, before I read this article, I thought "Oh, he was in a Zoom meeting and his wife came in and started yelling at him without realizing he was in an online meeting." That's much more understandable than reality.
I assumed it was like that too or they worked in the same company. This story seems over the top to me but if it is exactly as stated and he had not been caught cheating on her or something like that then she probably has mental illness and needs help! Intervention time or trial separation if it is as he described because something is not ok. Brain tumor? Roid rage? Feels like some back story or crucial detail is missing
Load More Replies... My second marriage was turning into this. Move your stuff into a storage facility and get a different place to live, this could escalate. In my second marriage, I made sure I fell asleep last.
Wow.... You need to see a divorce lawyer immediately. I agree with people on here who say she's abusive. It may not be physical abuse but it's still abuse. She isn't just a hot head, she stormed into *your* important meeting at work and *she* proceeded to caused a scene. How could you possibly be married to someone like that? It's scary. Get out as soon as you can.
I don't understand why the OP's wife thinks that is normal behavior and also blame the OP for how she reacts. As a lot of people have said, he is being abused and is finding it hard to accept it.
I would love to see her reaction if he were to show up at her workplace acting like that. But he better takes a few friends/colleges with him to explain to the police - because if a man acts like that, usually the police is called.
Unfortunately, there is a very big chance of the OP apologizing to this woman and asking her to come back. Abuse handicaps people in lots of different ways. Hopefully, he has enough strength and clarity to get away from her before it's too late.
I feel so sorry for OP. She is abusive with serious anger management issues, not a hot head. While I feel too many couples get divorced so easily now a days instead of what working out the problems, nor should someone say to someone else leave and get a divorce immediately. I’m sorry to say that this is what OP should do. As many have said, she will only escalate especially since she can’t see her wrong doing. I wish him well and hope he is ok.
You're still married to her why? Had this been the other way around, the guy would be in jail for a list of crimes,ade up or otherwise. She will show up at your job again and you will be unemployed. Divorce her now.
I understand that not every moment is like this. (Also the sign of an abuser.)Not every day is this bad. (Also the sign of an abuser)She can be sweet and kind and loving. She's sorry afterwards. (Typical of an abuser) That's what makes it so hard. Blaming you for being abused is just another sign of an abuser. Getting help for yourself would be the biggest sign of strength you could show. It isn't weakness to need to get out and get help. It IS a sad and terrible thing to let someone literally love you to death. And at this point she is more than halfway there. If she manages to remove your financial independence you'll be doomed. You can't fall down this rabbit hole any farther. Leaving doesn't say anything at all about her. It just says that You choose life. I wish you Every Good Thing.
Sounds like a personality disorder from the limited info provided. My ex used to call, call my bosses, show up places, scream about the (¼ full) trash not being taken out, and so many other inappropriate behaviors. We split when she decided unilaterally to move 3000 miles away. She's been making me and our child pay for it for the last 15 years. I hope OP runs and never looks back.
Oh hell no, this is not acceptable behavior in any way. This woman is abusive and controlling. She is trying to get him fired, I guarantee it! He needs to get a divorce ASAP. Therapy won't help, abusers never change or get better.
I wonder if this girls mom takes her side as in the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.. this guy is an idiot. I mean he compares him not doing the dishes and not refilling her gas tank as if it's equal to her abusing him.
Change the locks, get a restraining order and file for divorce, but stay in an apartment or motel. She sounds crazy enough to buy a gun.
Like so many others here, how is this even a question of being the AH??? Yes, of course I mean he's NOT!
I really hope you haven't had kids with her. That is not someone that should be the mother of your children.
My advice (yes, I know it's a Reddit story and probably not true, but still...): Find a good divorce lawyer and don't waste time about it. You know that's what she's doing. Throw the first punch.
The part I'm not getting is that OP is getting warnings from his employers. Why? He is not responsible for his spouse's behaviour.
Typical employer to act as though in this situation OP has any power to control this crazy person.
Load More Replies... Starts off by pointing out why she's literally a terrible person... Also him: still married to her for 2 years.... Like mate you need to run you're in danger mentally and emotionally
I hope this guy reads these messages and gets out of that marriage. She has serious issues - perhaps and undiagnosed mental disorder but he can’t let her drag his life down with her. I know. The bosses should not be blaming him and shouldn’t be sexist. If he was a woman they would recognize the signs of an abusive relationship. Companies usually have HR departments with access to employee assistance programs.
I’m not sure there’s any way at all to save that marriage. It seems to hurt not just OP but everyone that comes into contact with it. I sort of hope OP kind of cuts his losses and disengages.
Op needs therapy to understand why he puts up with this abuse. And why he justifies her behaviour. His language also sounds like he is blaming himself for her anger..."l didn t clean the bathroom after a shower or filll her gas tank after l used her car" He needs help to deal with this so he can move on to more healthy relationships.
Ok. Divorce restraining order and kick her out. Then get help. I don't know if you have an employee assistance program, but you need counseling and some assistance.
Dude is definitely guilty for letting her walk all over him at house. They don't work like we hope, man... We think "okay imma give you the pass in the house, but not at work" no it doesn't work like that, you let them walk all over you at your house, means you're training them to do it everywhere. With that said, nobody can blame you for mistakenly married an abuser. If we learn anything from johnny depp's case: divorce, now. I wish him the very best of luck.
Oh dear, divorce this psycho witch. It's only going to get worse and she will get you fired one day. Divorce her now before you have kids.
Again, we have the classic signs of narcissism. There are a LOT of them out there. She is trying to control everything you do 24/7, and has no concept of decent behaviour if you don't jump to her wishes. The fact that she actually saw nothing wrong with barging in to a business meeting and yelling at you shows she has no boundaries - at all. And then - she gaslights you - telling you it's YOUR fault that this happened. I'm sorry my friend, but you need to see a good lawyer. And I can tell you now that when she realizes that you are going for divorce, she will use every sexual wile she has to bring you back into her clutches. That's probably how she got you in the first place, isn't it? That's how narcissists function. Don't fall for it. Don't let her in the same room as you or she'll find a way to sway you. RUN - to the nearest lawyer's office.
This will only escalate because she has no remorse and takes no responsibility for the impact of her actions. NTA, yo-yos victim of Domestic Violence! Get help or get away, just don’t ignore it because it won’t change without action.
If he stays, this woman is going to eventually murder him, guaranteed. He seriously needs to get a divorce and a restraining order. Not only is she abusive and controlling, she is absolutely unhinged and unreasonable, displaying an escalation in abusive behaviour. I wish there were an update, preferably stating he had left her and had taken some protective actions for his own safety.
🤣 he likes it, that's why he married her. He's not going to divorce her. If he loses his job, that's his problem.
Put your foot down man!! She's your woman not your man or your boss. She acts like this because you allow it. I have watched this happen for years over my life with my own mother and her husbands. Yes "husbands"! Two outcomes are going to happen either it will escalate and you will get tired of it and tell her bye or she's going to wise up and realize you aren't taking her c**p anymore. Then make it clear when you do that's this is how it's going to be. Your not a victim unless you make yourself a victim and you can't be abused unless you give opportunity for abuse! True love is not about bowing over it's about compromise and understanding from both partner's respecting each other and caring about each other 100%. Treat her with patience and love but do it with a spine. Don't give her ultimatums but open opportunities and stand your ground!!
That is abuse. You need to get therapy, you might not agree with this one yet, but you need it. Abuse victims tend to blame themselves when they are not at fault.
I was admin manager/finance manager at a company, and did the payroll. I would get weekly calls from the wife of one of the guys there. She would always try and order me to give her information etc. I never did, as being marriage doesn't mean you own the other persons identity. The guys job was never at risk, as we just felt sorry for him. She was told not to call the office again and he was asked to reinforce this. If she did, I would just hang up on her. LOL
Your wife has some mental health issues! There is nothing you can do to stop this behavior. She can't even stop this behavior! You are the victim of domestic abuse. It does not get better, it only gets worse. I hope you have the strength to get out, but at least don't bring children into it. My heart breaks thinking of a child being subjected to that.
She runs roughshod over any boundaries while you seem to take inventory of everything you do to make sure it's perfect. And she makes herself out to be the victim after this unbelievable violation. She seems like a narcissist and/or BPD--in any case, super controlling with anger management issues. You should have excused yourself and helped security escort her out because you are responsibke for making sure that someone connected to you doesn't interfere with your place of employmemt. If you can't do that, you deserve to be fired. Man up, set sone boundaries, have confidence in those boundaries and stick to them. Oh, and please get out of this marriage.
WTF???? This kind of treatment is crazy! Say "adios" and get some counseling
What makes me angry is that if a man was doing this to his wife, the job would likely try to help the wife with domestic violence services rather than trying to fire her. Yet reverse the genders and this guy's job is at stake.
Divorce lawyer is who you should contact. She doesn't accept responsibility for her actions so it will continue & get worse. You did the right thing & your not an a*****e. You are being abused. She is verbally & mentally abusive, controlling, & she will never admit any fault with her behavior. You need to do everything to get away from her because this will get worse. I'm sorry honey, but she is abusive to you. No adult should ever act like that especially at a work place. Get away from her & cut all ties with her. Good luck.
NTA! Your wife has anger issues that should've been dealt with a LONG TIME AGO!! When you finally called her out on it, telling her that her barging into the office, during an IMPORTANT meeting with POTENTIAL CLIENTS, to yell at you for something inconsequential, nearly cost YOU your JOB, she starts crying and making it about HER!! While she's at her mom's, consult a lawyer about your options. They may recommend to pursue marriage counseling (she could benefit from personal counseling herself to get to the root of her anger issues and find ways to manage her anger instead of taking it out on you). If you have tried counseling and it didn't work, or she refused to go with you, then seek a divorce. Also, file a restraining order and change the locks (also get a Ring doorbell and security cameras). If you haven't already done so, DOCUMENT the times she had verbally attacked you; that can help you in a court of law if SHE decides to sue you.
When somebody's behavior is over the top I would recommend her getting an MRI of her brain and see if she has cerebral spinal fluid that is out of place .. she might have taken a blow to the head or been dropped as a baby that causes this wild behavior .. this is basically what football players have... Of course you can affect any of us with head injuries.. not to defend her but she might not be able to help it and I wonder if she has a frontal lobe injury which governs our behavior...
If this guy hasn't already filed for divorce, he's an idiot. Probably not since he deleted his account
I would definitely do some late-spring cleaning and pack everything that's hers and have it shipped to her Mom's house, along with restraining order and divorce papers. Actually, a storage unit for the first month can be as low as $20, much less than shipping. After all, she's cost you enough already. You cannot fix her. She's got some serious mental health issues. You are not obligated to stay with anybody that treats you this way. It's not like sticking by her through chemo or something. It will take years for her to work through whatever made her into an a*****e and until she does, she's going to continue treating you this way. Don't be a martyr. Either leave her or give her an ultimatum: she either starts intensive therapy or it's over. That's an option too if you're just not ready to call it quits.. yet. I do wonder, though: is she this way with everyone else, too? Did it start suddenly or gradually get progressively worse over time? Curious.
" Said that I'm the one creating these situations and can't blame here for how she reacts" that's gaslighting at it's finest. You've got a psycho, bro. Granted, this is only one side of the story, but it sounds like she needs to be cut loose and get he needs a restraining order.
Want to know how many times my wife has yelled at me over the past 6 years we've been together? Zero times, we don't fight ever, a few light arguments here and there (maybe 2 or 3 times a year), but never something so disrespectful and we've been through a lot together. If anyone says fighting is normal in a relationship, they are full of s**t, they are searching for a justification for their inability to talk to each other and work things out peacefully. It can be done and there are non-abusive people out there who are much more worth this person's time. Don't fall victim to people who act like this, they don't deserve to be with anyone.
Whew! If this man don't divorce that she-witch harpy and ASAP??? If the JD-AH trial taught us anything, its that women like the OP's spouse and AH are massively controlling narcissists who often use these types of 'guerilla' tactics on men and then when confronted, try to use their flying monkeys i.e. family, friends, etc to gaslight you. Sir...RUNNNNNN! Get to the best divorce attorney you can find and while you're at it, change the locks, close all joint bank accounts where your funds are or simply transfer out all of your funds, and especially GET A RESTRAINING ORDER! Be prepared for the She-Beast's Mom and family members to descend, wanting to plead her case. If and when they do, tell them to STFU and get that girl some help because you're not her verbal punching bag. You deserve better, man. Wishing you luck and most importantly, Peace of Mind.🙏🏾
You need to go to counseling to find out why you are allowing this kind of behavior...& learn how to stop it or get out of the marriage. Your wife needs to go to counseling for anger management & being abusive.
I dunno. It sounds like you ought to protect your own emotions, and that either she’s controlling, or maybe just anxious with abandonment or trust issues. If she’s willing to go to counseling, I’m all for it. If it crosses the line into abuse, get far away forever. Just because you’re a man, doesn’t make you any lesser for having the need to protect yourself emotionally. You are not a coward or wuss. You’re asserting your own dignity. You have my best wishes.
I get that you’re offering to support here and that is kind, but it’s important to note that she has already “crossed the line into abuse”. The behaviour he describes is definitely abusive, no question.
Load More Replies... People asking if they're the a*****e for stuff like this are just seeking attending online. I mean come on...
Yeah if it sounds too good to be true it often is. That's why I think there has to be more he left out. I mean it does happen but more in isolation and he is not isolated. Reactive abuse is a real thing and I wonder if this particular incident was a set up or if it is not then why has he not done more to get counselling? They are so young still. You don't put up with this kind of stuff usually u til much later and when kids are in the picture and it is gradual. It doesn't mean she doesn't need help but if it happens after particular triggers or he cheated and she has sort of lost it then the story is more relatable/ believable.
Load More Replies... As long as you aren't gaslighting her or manipulating her in a way that she is going off the deep end acting this way, then definitely protect yourself. Do check to make certain you aren't a source of her issues. This goes both ways for both gender roles.
The fact you have to ask on a forum if you did something wrong speaks volumes. Your wife's behavior is wrong on so many levels and you allowing such disrespect and abuse shows signs of low self esteem and codependency. Please seek a therapist and encourage her to do the same. She needs to stay at her mother's until you get some help.
She’s a bit young for you. Maybe you should marry someone closer to your age. 26 year olds are not as mature as 33 year olds and it sounds like she’s especially immature even for a woman her age. It’s very hard to walk away but in the long run, you’ll be glad you did. She’ll probably repeat this bad behavior wherever you work so beware….I agree with Mrs. Glass — change the locks!! And get her some mental help. She might have some kind of personality issue or mental imbalance.. It’s not normal behavior your describing.
What changes are you waiting to see from her. Because they are not happening. Do the next guy who will date her a favor and wake her up by closing the door behind you. So she can grow the F up. Do not waste any more time on her dude. And please have some standards with your next girl, look beyond the pretty face.
It sounds like the wife might have Histrionic Personality Disorder. If she doesn't get help and I doubt she will, he needs to divorce her. If she's this bad about small things, what will she do when they have kids, or a disagreement within their families. He deserves better.
There’s no need to diagnose strangers on the internet here - it’s not helpful or relevant and reinforces mental health stigma. All we know for sure is that her behaviour is abusive, and abuse is always unacceptable even if there’s a clinical issue behind it. I agree he deserves better and hope he can find the strength and support to do what’s best for himself and escape the abuse.
Load More Replies... NTA in this situation but yes, YTA, because you married this crazy woman 😀 Or 2 years ago she was a total different type of person? My friend married exactly this type of woman, few years ago, never saw him again unfortunately, but he did the choice, as you.
He musta been some kinda wimp for tolerating that in the first place. She's an abusive mentally ill b***h who's so unhappy, she has to take it out in everyone else. She should be working in a job herself. Does she not do anything worthy with her time. He needs to grow some balls, and divorce her, but watch out! She's definitely the psycho stalker type who'll take revenge. She should be in a looney bin.
There is more to the story and why. If he loves her he has a obligation to work it out . The institution of marriage has been destroyed. I won't say by who or what people.
Oh f**k off. No one, not a single person has an "obligation" to stay in an abusive relationship. Puritanical assholes like you are why people stay with their abusers. Shame on you.
Load More Replies... I hope he divorces her, gets a fantastic lawyer and a vasectomy, ONLY because it wouldn't surprise me if she shows up pregnant and tries to claim it's his. IF I understand correctly, vasectomy's can be reversed. This may be harsh to some, she needs to be locked up and medicated.
DNA tests exist. Not sure why you think a vasectomy is part of the solution here.
Load More Replies... Was she tracking his phone because he had been cheating on her? I'm sorry but he sounds too good to be true. Something is missing. He says he doesn't follow through and she gets irate but this sounds a lot like what happened to my friend whose husband was having a daliancewith a coworker and stopped but the difference is my friend had been married 15 years and was good friends with the boss so she went to him with the husband and asked that the woman, who was absolutely the pursuer( receipts)was moved to another team. But later, the other lady was doing things to her personally, and her kids, etc..the woman had done something like this before with a new employee who quickly quit. It was too much so my friend, at her wits end, went down and confronted the lady for all to see and know. Turns out the boss was upset a bit, then a third man came out that he was being harassed by her, so it was good. He came forward because the scene made him see he wasn't going to get in trouble. Maybe there's more to this story, too. If OPs wife is paranoid then why? Is it illness or is he gaslighting us with half truths? I can hear the other woman telling such a story about my friend and her hubby who left her when she got fired
I know this may seem odd to say but I feel if a man was doing this she would be more likely to be fired. They would see her as weak, unable to manage her personal life and a liability. In this case with the man they give warnings thinking he can and will get it under control. The same belief and faith I do not feel would be gifted to a woman. Part of this variance in response could be the interpretation that the threat of a woman is less than that if a man. And potentially that we feel it is more normal to write off adult female aggression as crazy verses scary or threatening.
Are you simple??? If a man walked into a females work place and began acting like she did...5 will get you 10 he'd end up in handcuffs.
Load More Replies... Wow! This is fiery. No hope for this couple. No chance to talk things out I guess. It's my way or the highway. Tricky. I personally would find it very hard to do this if I loved the person I married. It's only two years. Yes! I can see your point but....... I think they need to get counselling. No wonder so many divorces......Just get a new puppy is what it sounds like.
COUNSELING DOESNT FIX EVERYTHING! JFC.....some of you would likely suggest dragging a freshly murdered corpse into therapy to "help heal" the person that killed them! And its NOT a Spouse's job to be your punching bag-IN ANY FORM! She has done this c**p before and she WONT CHANGE. For the love of all things sacred, I hope the OP never takes your advice. Poor man will be in jail or worse, hoping for 'reconciliation ' with a feral wildcat.
Load More Replies... Please explain your thought process, I’d like to understand how you came to such a stupid conclusion.
Load More Replies... 
161
194