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We live in a colorful world, no doubt about it. With so much information bombarding us every day, it’s easy to lose track of what’s really going on around us.

And by really, I mean that we often fail to pause and reflect on the dynamics of our modern society where people celebrate an inherently positive side of the world. But what if beneath its wholesome surface lies an underlying toxicity that feeds our delusions even further?

It sounds like one of those difficult thoughts that haunt us before falling asleep. But thanks to one Redditor who recently asked a seemingly basic question “What are 'wholesome' things that are actually toxic?” we now have some truly eye-opening answers. From family vlogging to animal rescue videos that are often totally fake, these are some examples to remind us to not take everything at face value.

#1

Not sure if it’s on here already, but I get super uncomfortable when a video of a classroom of kids giving the kid who “can’t afford new shoes” a brand new pair as a surprise. The entire culture of filming while doing kind things for people is so exploitive and gross and sad.

LaceyThunderwear Report

#2

The expectation to keep your family members in your life no matter what they do. Some people have families that treat them like absolute [trash], and being related to them isn't a good reason to keep them around. It's ok to cut off toxic family members.

Weirdo_666_420 Report

#3

Body positivity like Dove's "Real Beauty" campaign. The idea that all women are beautiful sounds nice on the surface, but it's a gross message to send because beauty is still at the core of it. I don't want to be told that my body is beautiful too, I want to be told that I don't have to be beautiful, that my value is not tied to how much other people enjoy looking at me.

verytiredverymerry Report

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HooowlAtTheMoon
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Exactly, I don't care about whether I look 'beautiful' or not, I want it to be okay to not care if i look 'beautiful' or not

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#4

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Beauty Pagents

Chopper3 Report

#5

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic “Look at this adorable 4-year-old using a walker! So inspirational!”

“Awww, this guy asked a deaf girl to prom!”

“Watch this group of guys playing tackle football with a guy with Down syndrome!!”

“Check out this amazing blind kid walking down a street! Next level, yo!”

an_ineffable_plan Report

#6

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Proposing in front of a crowd. Puts a lot of pressure on the person being proposed to.

HeliosHeliodes , SpnkyHappy Report

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Ivo H
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes, NEVER do that in public. Or (even worse) in front of family, or friends. The exception is, of course, if your spouse knows about it and agrees.

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#7

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Corporations who spend $50 million on ads to tell you about the amazing $1 million they spent on a charity program.

DeFex , Patrick Perkins Report

#8

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Toxic positivity. Like when someone's having a really hard time and you tell them to stay positive or try to look at the bright side. [Screw] you Jenny, my grandma died.

bluecatcollege , Johan Godínez Report

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IzzieM
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes, people should stop doing this. Being supportive does not equate being positive. There's a difference.

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#9

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Instagram "influencers" promoting their "amazing" healthy lifestyles but in reality mostly staged/photoshopped and exacerbating mental illness, body issues, anxiety in young people.

forestcreature989 , kyliejenner Verified Report

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SoozeeQ
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"You can lead an Influencer to a dictionary, but you can't make them think". - James Weir

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#10

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Touching women’s bellies when they’re pregnant. You don’t go around patting a penis to congratulate it on its successful ejaculation. Damn.

Hellifaks , Junior REIS Report

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wendillon avatar
Monday
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

To be fair touching a belly is usually to feel the baby move. I don't think it's a problem if the women in question is cool with it.

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Deborah B
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You shouldn't touch someone's body without their consent. If you know them well, and they are comfortable with it, touching the belly can let you feel the baby kick, which is awesome if it's your grandkid/sibling/godchild-to-be. I can't imagine why a woman would let anyone but a family member or close friend touch their belly.

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Charlotte A.
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've had people do this without asking.... I just tell them "I'm not pregnant, I'm fat". I think I rather enjoy embarrassing them (and yes, I am fat, not pregnant).

lsoo avatar
Raine Soo
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's wonderful that you have such a good sense of humour about it. I have a couple of friends, who in their younger days, used to be constantly mistaken for being pregnant. People offered their seats to them on public transit. I had to stand. One eventually had two boys, and the other remained child-free.

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Jaren Park
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I go around patting penises all the time so...whoops, wrong website...

danrider avatar
Son of Philosoraptor
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Friend of mine actually did that to me when my ex got pregnant with my first child. It works! He yelled and grabbed my crotch. Startled the hell out of me.

master_minds9 avatar
denzoren
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"Who's a good boy....you're a good boy" oh wait...why is it doing that. Lol

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Mimi777
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

2 months after I had my baby this lady patted my belly while in checkout line at the grocery and asked when am I due I told her I wasn’t pregnant. (I gained a s**t ton of weight while pregnant and had a bigger belly for several months after) she got beet red and said sorry and walked off quickly. But yeah it was super weird for a stranger to do that but also uncomfortable for people I know to do it as well.

kicki avatar
Panda Kicki
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have only read about this . Four pregnancies and noone has dared to try to pat my belly. Maybe my aura of "Touch me and I kill you slowly" shines through 😁

terawdon avatar
TheAnimalLady
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Full Belly Laugh 😅😹🤣😻🤣🤪 and startled the dog 🐕

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kjorn
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

yeah... i'm still waiting for the patting on my penis... nobody do that for me... :-(

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Kaycee Friend
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Pregnant bellies are beautiful, there is a little life growing in there! I wouldn't want to touch a stranger's belly or them, mine.

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Colleen Garland
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Always ask first. I had twins, 11days past my due date. People were almost afraid to touch me. 6lbs 110z and 9lbs 4 oz. I can understand their feelings. I looked like I could explode, who wants that in their face.

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Blue of the yams
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You mean I SHOULDN'T touch strangers penis'?! Wow what an age to be alive

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y a n a
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Patting penises and patting a pregnant woman's stomach is not the same thing tbf lol

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𝔓𝔯𝔬𝔣𝔢𝔰𝔰𝔬𝔯 𝔇𝔢𝔯𝔭
3 years ago

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abby smink
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Had someone who worked in the same hospital as me, whom I've never even seen before that day, rub my belly and ask me what (gender) I was having. I wasn't even pregnant.

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Pamela Blue
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Whatever happened to not touching a woman without permission, pregnant or not?

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Wonderful
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I like to crouch on the ground in front of a pregnant woman and say to her crotch "who's va-jay jay just made a bay-bay? That's right! You did! Such a good little va-jay jay. Yes you are!" Then stand back up and walk off like nothing happened. Pregnant women love it.

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Ian Reynolds
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think the penis pat should be introduced, if it wasn't for our baby gravy there wouldn't be a child.

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Jonathan Setter
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

it is like a dog, you don't pat it on the head, you stroke it gently and tell him what a good boy he's been.... then he sits up and begs.

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Trudesh
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh yeah. I patted my FIL stomach back when he did that do me. "Nice bump"

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Mark Kelly
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've neve thought of doing that ever and never thought people would just do it..

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fenderfan85
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh....so I'm not supposed to be doing that? No wonder that guy was so angry.

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Annett Nyrud
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I experienced this the other way around. Pregnant woman felt the baby kick, just grabbed my hand and put in on her belly. I was shocked, as it happened out of nowhere.

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Jace
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There's so much toxic bullshit around women and pregnancy. It can dehumanize them into baby factories or put them on a pedestal for basic life functions. I absolutely despise the "miracle of birth" bullshit. It's not a miracle. It's a biological function. It's the PRIMARY function of all living things: reproduce! It's not something to be worshipped, fawned over, or lorded over.

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C.S. E.
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Just stop touching people unless it is invited, full stop. Hair, tummies, even cut out a wrist grab when you want someone to stop walking away (I'm lookin' at you, K-dramas)

deannawoods avatar
deanna woods
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mom said that people touching her pregnant belly made her very uncomfortable and seeing other people do it to women makes her feel the same. The only people allowed to touch her belly were my dad and members of the family.

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Ginny Weasley
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

seriously, only the spouse of the woman (and relatives, and HER, and then people that have her consent.

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Bianca Saville
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The baby is actually in the tummy. You are patting the actual baby

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S. Tor Storm
Community Member
3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

uhm, who are patting the vulva tho? dont think that's normal.

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#11

The pure existence of most modern dog breeds. Pugs, for example. We all think they’re super cute, but the truth is - they are extremely deformed and constantly suffering as a result of a century of inbreeding. A lot of people don’t know this, and it’s really sad. I’m not saying these dogs should be put down right now, just saying it would’ve been a better idea not to inbreed dogs for centuries.

Programmeter Report

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SoozeeQ
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes, and they shouldn't be allowed to continue to breed. Same with those munchkin cats. Poor little things can't breathe.

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#12

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Asking your child "Who's your boy/girlfriend?" any time they interact with someone of the opposite sex.

freakishfrenchhorn , Kevin Gent Report

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Eva the Egg
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes! I hate it when people assume there's something going on when you're just hanging out with your friends

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#13

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Badgering people to have kids. No, I’m not going to magically change my mind when I meet the right girl.

Cultist902 , Marisa Howenstine Report

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Raine Soo
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Having children was never on my agenda. It's great for people who want them. But, you really need to know yourself because it is a lifetime commitment, and you can't give them back. Besides, not everyone is fit to be a parent.

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#14

Dads trying to be weirdly aggressive/threatening to their daughter's bfs.

Baby_Belugas Report

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Monday
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"LOL I met my daughter's new boyfriend at the door with my shotgun, isn't that hilarious!". No John, it's not funny and if you ever do that to my hypothetical son again I'm calling the cops.

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#15

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Family vlogging

Vasa_Vasorum_ , The Moore The Merrier Vlogs Report

#16

Punking people with practical jokes that are fake traumatic incidents. There is absolutely nothing funny about witnessing a fake death, mortal injury or abuse and then discovering it was all an elaborate joke. It’s traumatizing.

serendipindy Report

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denzoren
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Youtubers..."It's a prank bro" is basically the lowest type of human.

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#17

As a former homeless person, I can't put into words how annoying the people who film themselves handing out food for a viral video with some emotional pop song overlaid on it are. It's 100% "look at me, look how cool and HELPFUL I am" while honestly not giving a real damn about the homeless. It'd be one thing if you're putting your fame and money back into funding a shelter, or true change and volunteering and charity efforts but not just dropping $20 on some McDonalds meals to drive around LA filming strangers sleeping on the street for a bit.

IniMiney Report

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Sue Hazlewood
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have given food and money to people on the street but it never occurred to me to photograph it. So damn tacky and insulting to the person you are giving to.

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#18

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Using your child for likes on social media, that's creepy I never understood why would any parent do that

Kashboii , Sai De Silva Report

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Raine Soo
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's amazing the things people do for 'likes' on social media. Some people have died, trying to get the right photograph.

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#19

Abstinence and purity promise culture. Really [screws] people up for a long time when you teach them that:

A.) sex is dirty, bad and evil

B.) their worth as a person is tied to that purity

VonSnapp Report

#20

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Asking babies to hug and kiss people

Hills1849 , Mehdi Sepehri Report

#21

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Glorifying feeding animals into obesity

saladsnake34 , Mr TGT Report

#22

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic School fundraisers.

If the government can't give schools enough funds, then everything is wrong.

exec_director_doom , Jeffrey Hamilton Report

#23

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Repeatedly professing your love for someone after they tell you that they aren't interested.

The idea that you can "make" someone love you back if you just keep trying is rooted in toxicity, but romanticized in countless films and TV shows.

Clarpydarpy , Tyler Nix Report

#24

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Teachers giving up their Sick Days for some other teacher can have days off for Cancer Treatments.

Rubeclair702 , Sharon McCutcheon Report

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Raine Soo
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sick days should be given freely to those who need them. There is no reason why cancer treatments should not qualify.

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#25

"If you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best." In theory, I'm supposed to be a statement of unconditional love, but in reality it's just inviting toxic behavior with no way out

SlightlyArtichoke Report

#26

The idea that feeling anger makes you a bad person, or that you are obligated to forgive absolutely everyone who has hurt you.

ElectricYV Report

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King Joffrey
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Feeling anger doesn't make you a bad person, displaying anger to people who haven't caused it does.

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#27

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Any viral story about some kid selling [stuff] to pay for a relatives healthcare.

natelopez53 Report

#28

Dolphins at SeaWorld and other family centers. They are generally all in a state of extreme mental health stress and have to be given drugs to keep them calm. In addition, the profits from capturing the best looking dolphins and selling them to these places fuel an annual dolphin hunt in Japan where the vast majority are sold for animal meat. It is a brutal practice where an extremely intelligent and sentient animal group is killed without painkillers in a slaughter.

DemocraticRepublic Report

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Raine Soo
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This practice is awful, and I do not frequent these types of venues. Dolphins are not here to entertain us or provide us with food, particularly in such a brutal manner. I wish people could just simply appreciate them.

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#29

Receiving recognition for perfect attendance. My ass that you never got sick.

Negafox Report

#30

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Supporting someone no matter what choices they make. You can love someone to the ends of the earth, that doesn’t mean they will 100% be right all of the time, no matter how much you love or admire them.

Background-Pop9203 , Priscilla Du Preez Report

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Raine Soo
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I absolutely support my best friend. But, I will tell her if something is stupid.

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#31

When people who are super spiritual and love love love all the time judge and ridicule you for not being in a good mood or for needing space. “You’re ruining the vibe” “this isn’t a hostile environment”- gaslighting is wrong and these people do it ALL THE TIME! I call them “the love police”.

Lizzwho Report

#32

Any kind of 'tough love'. "Other people have it worse" or "Kids should get bullied to toughen up" (Yes someone actually said this to me).

TheKingofHearts Report

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Raine Soo
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mom was very big on tough love. She would try to nag me into submission. All it did was build up my resentment toward her. Yes, there was backtalk from my part, which infuriated her even more. I laugh about it now, but trust me, I was a frustrated teenager and young adult.

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#33

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic All those fake animal rescue videos on YouTube.

Midlux Report

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AJ
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Can't help thinking that when there's a demand for resque pets, doesn't that create supply of resque pets.

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#34

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Teachers working overtime/sacrificing for their students/fundraising for anything/etc. Most news articles that hit national headlines about teachers are toxic af.

"student raises money for his former teacher found living in a car"

"principal works 2nd job to help homeless students have clean clothes and food"

misterdudebro , airfocus Report

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Raine Soo
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is just so sad. The education system should be properly funded by government, so there are less stories like these.

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#35

Spending so much time on social media to show everyone else how wholesome your life is.

sanchito88 Report

#36

Spouses being their partners EVERYTHING. it's okay to have other friends, actually it's even healthy to have a robust social life in which you get different things out of your relationships with different people

petticoatwar Report

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AJ
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Damn covid19 my partner has become about the only person I've seen in a year! Though we've agreed be both need a lot alone time now when neither of us barely have other relationships.

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#37

Baby onesies that say stuff. Some are innocent...a lot are not. I'm a first time mom to a 6mo son. My child is not here to make grandma feel like a "mother without rules". And keep that "chick magnet" [nonsense] outta my face.

hlfpint Report

#38

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic "We're all just one big family!"

If anyone tells you this in a workplace setting, run. They're only like a family in the sense of the most toxic parts of one that exploit you.

Andromeda321 Report

#39

People Expose 40 Things That Pretend To Be Wholesome Yet Are Actually Toxic Youtube kids channels. The ones aimed at older audiences are literally better for a child than the kids ones.

cringyfrick , The Sean Ward Show Report

#40

News stories like "CEO sees employee dumpster diving for food and buys them a headlamp"

or

"Kid works manual labor to pay off school lunch debt for entire class"

Dire-Dog Report

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WilvanderHeijden
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But they were actual headlines and they do reflect how twisted the US society has become. It's amusing for outsiders, it's very sad for people living in the US.

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Note: this post originally had 53 images. It’s been shortened to the top 40 images based on user votes.