There's no simple answer as to why kids' books are sometimes so bizarre, cruel, and entirely incomprehensible to us, adults. Maybe they need to teach some lessons to the kids, that we do not understand anymore? Or perhaps they seem so crazy because grown-ups don't have the imagining capabilities of a child? No matter the explanation, these children books could easily steal some weird things show. And maybe the culprit of these books for kids being so peculiar, is that children's minds haven't been ruined by adult humor the way ours have, so children's book authors have a lot of leeways when it comes to the language they use? And even with that in mind, some of these pages from weird children's books are still very difficult to explain.

From some seemingly innocent toddler books demanding to touch a cow to an informative book called 'Mommy Drinks Because You're Bad' and a, now-classic children book, called 'All My Friends Are Dead,' the list could go on and on. So scroll down below to get your fair share of scary kids books; who knows, maybe you'll find your favorite baby books in there too!

#1

Poor Pussy Party Game

Poor Pussy Party Game

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FionaMessenger
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I actually remember seeing this game in a book as a kid. Shame sick adult humour has spoiled this.

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#2

Morning Of Awkwardness

Morning Of Awkwardness

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#4

Bones

Bones

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BarbaraDelahunty
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I actually think this is very good as it shows the relationship between a human's bones and those of a horse in a very understandable way.

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#6

The Kiss

The Kiss

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JeanneDeaux
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Is it me or does it look like...no, I must imagine things... =D

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#7

Teddy Bear Would Rather Sit And Watch

Teddy Bear Would Rather Sit And Watch

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#8

Dick, Dick, What Did You Lick ?

Dick, Dick, What Did You Lick ?

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MarigoldMoonbeam
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Is it a coincidence that a character named Dick is holding a piece of sausage?

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#9

Pleasure Island

Pleasure Island

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#10

Seamen

Seamen

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#11

Pretend I'm The Poop

Pretend I'm The Poop

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ElliotLord
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you say that one more time, I'll break your nose...

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#12

The Secret Of Being A Good Lover

The Secret Of Being A Good Lover

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TamaraGonzález
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"not knowing when to stop".... mmm...ok... thanks lions! :D

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#13

Harpo's Horrible Secret

Harpo's Horrible Secret

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JoannaKonarzewski-Glazman
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Really??? No one??????? ..... And they forgot to color in between the kids legs, #Fail

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#14

Curious George

Curious George

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#16

Butcher

Butcher

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ElliotLord
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And this, on my right, is my wife... well, 'was'...

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#17

All My Friends Are Dead

All My Friends Are Dead

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#18

Japan

Japan

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ElaineBrubaker
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can't tell which broke the brick... The foot or the scary noxious, green gas. Bwahaha!

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#19

Turtles Sleep

Turtles Sleep

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ErikaHill
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Are they gang raping the sleeping turtle? I'm so confused

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#22

Horse Balls

Horse Balls

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#23

Suck It

Suck It

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HayleyLightcap
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love the looks on the other animals' faces

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#26

Scouts In Bondage

Scouts In Bondage

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#28

Fellow Fags

Fellow Fags

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#32

A Lion Is Coming

A Lion Is Coming

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#33

Stalker George

Stalker George

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MarigoldMoonbeam
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

George is going to end up on an episode of "Forensic Files"...or a Lifetime Network made-for-tv movie.

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#34

They Should Have Written Kitty

They Should Have Written Kitty

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OCH
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The Owl and the Pussycat, Edward Lear. Don't think we need to go rewriting classic literature just because some of us have dirty minds :-)

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#35

Cheers!

Cheers!

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AllMonkeyBizz
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"Quality religious books for children" at top

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#36

Had To Include This One!

Had To Include This One!

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TaraynMarissa
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is, again, a book intended for adults. Not children. Samuel L Jackson does the audio book! :D

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#37

Why Mommy Poisoned You

Why Mommy Poisoned You

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Ego_TheMusic
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Because mommy has mental issues love or a dysfunctional marriage and was aiming to poison your dad

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#38

Horse Would Be Shot

Horse Would Be Shot

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AlejandraGL
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, no, Jeanne, a horse with a broken leg is suppressed because there's no way it can't heal, it's an act of mercy

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#39

Richard Scarry's Busy, Busy Town

Richard Scarry's Busy, Busy Town

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Lisa-MarieSaunders
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I remember this book from when I was a child! I loved Richard Scarry books!

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#40

Piglet's Pizza... With Ham (it's From Polish Edition Of Disney's Pooh's Cooking Book)

Piglet's Pizza... With Ham (it's From Polish Edition Of Disney's Pooh's Cooking Book)

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#41

How Many Times Did They Try?

How Many Times Did They Try?

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PandaBrewr
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I shot that there horse, and he kept goin'. I jumped off a building and he kept on trotten. Then he bucked me off and killed me

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#42

Roll Over, Beethoven

Roll Over, Beethoven

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katnip
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

LOOK AT THE KID HES GOING TO KILL US ALL!!!

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#43

Alphabet Book For Norwegian Children. Author: Henriette Eriksen

Alphabet Book For Norwegian Children. Author: Henriette Eriksen

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#45

Get The Fuck Off.. Mr. T And Me

Get The Fuck Off.. Mr. T And Me

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#46

The Chocolate Cock

The Chocolate Cock

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#47

About A Mole Who Wanted To Know Who Pooped On His Head

About A Mole Who Wanted To Know Who Pooped On His Head

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RueSingh
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This kind of looks like Donald Trump. Kind of =D

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#48

If You Wonder What Sort Of Books Read Kids In Russia, This Is An Example.

If You Wonder What Sort Of Books Read Kids In Russia, This Is An Example.

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OlegKrasin
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I wouldn't say it's a typical Russian book for kids. It's the only one I've see in such military style. Except the books about war maybe.

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#49

My First Little Boob Job

My First Little Boob Job

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#50

Pika Pika?

Pika Pika?

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PedroSchor
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you consider "pika" is homophone for "dick" in Brazilian Portuguese, this is exceptionally funny hahahaha

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#51

Pride And Premenstrual Syndrome

Pride And Premenstrual Syndrome

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#52

Of Mice And Men(struation)

Of Mice And Men(struation)

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Boop
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This actually seems helpful for girls who just got there's

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#53

I'll Take Your Word For It.

I'll Take Your Word For It.

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IvelinPenchev
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's the one Joey reads for Emma's birthday in Friends :D

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#54

Astronomy Or Anatomy?

Astronomy Or Anatomy?

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OUSSAMA AGZOUL
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

the a**s is the end of the large intestine. Not somebody's penis.

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#57

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