Immigrants Who Moved To The US Say These 30 Social Habits Are Super Hard To Get Used To
Grabbing coffee to-go, laughing so loud the windows tremble, and keeping your shoes on when walking into someone’s home don’t raise a single American brow. But it’s a whole different story if we are talking non-Americans who moved to the land of the free and are just getting used to things the American way.
So when one Reddit user put up a question “Non-Americans who moved to the US, what are some social customs that have been the hardest for you to get used to?” on r/AskReddit, people who left their native lands had a whole bunch of stuff to comment on.
From showing thumbs up, which is considered rude in foreign countries, to finding potluck dinners super odd, and realizing bidets are off the map, these are some of the most illuminating answers people shared.
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Still blows my mind that healthcare isn't free, and people actually go bankrupt, legitimately bankrupt, from medical bills.
The work culture! You get so few vacation days and most people didn't use them all for fear of what it looks like. In the UK, if we don't use all our days, HR will normally ask us if everything is okay
Being an American that works for a European company I'm still jealous that my employees who sit in Switzerland and Germany get almost double the days off that I do.
Strangers asking you what church you go to. Or the rather competitive nature of religion here. It seems less important to actually believe and more important to let people know how much you believe.
Best part is that you can have your own church, find some gullible people and live like a king on the expense of the poor fools that believe in you and you can even apply for tax exemptions. Being a televangelist is very profitable in the US.
Saying "I'm Irish" but they haven't been to Ireland and neither have their parents.
There's a man where I work who claims he's 7% viking and gets really offended when anyone makes fun of him.
The pride people have in being unhealthy, ignoring serious symptoms, proudly eating like crap, proudly not exercising. And yet having the most expensive health care system in the world and refusing to accept alternatives. "that's whack man"
Let me stop you for a second. Healthy food is expensive as f**k here. You can spend $7 on two pounds of grapes, or buy two happy meals. Which one will you give your kids as a meal? Our countries obesity problem is primarily driven by the crappy food industry we have and the lobbyist that keep it that way. America is one of the most corrupt countries in the world because of lobbyist. Our poor healthcare, poor labor rights, poor social security and much more is all due to lobbyist.
Again, you are making general assumptions about a country with millions of people in it. You really think everyone is like that?
There is no pride when healthy food is super expensive compared to box food. We don't proudly eat like c**p, we eat what we can afford. As for working out at Gyms, they aren't regulated like they should be and most of them are meat markets for the horny people. People who work at the gyms are not properly educated either and they are all about the green stuff. The health care system is over priced but unfortunately, we have to use it if we want to fix our medical issues. So tell me, what alternatives are you talking about? I would love to know where you get your information.
Are you sure you know what the word "proudly" means? No one does it proudly, they just do it.
But much of the rest of the world is even worse. Mexico, Saudi Arabia, Turkey, Samoa, Germany, Britain, Scotland - those and many other countries have serious and growing obesity & diabetes problems. Some have even higher obesity rates than the US. And many non-Americans just can't get enough of McDs, Coca Cola, Starbucks Frappucinnos and all of America's other nutritionally atrocious foods. Plus, just like Americans, much of the rest of the world either already spends a ton of time sitting in front of screens or is doing that more and more. Also tobacco smoking rates are much higher in many parts of Asia and Europe. So yeah, we're bad on many health and lifestyle habits and much of the rest of the world is too.
To all the people who are angry because they feel that this isn't true, it is the picture that you paint yourselves to the rest of the world. " My Big Fat Fabulous Life" "My 600LBS life" "1000 LB Sisters" are US TV-series. Search for Eating contest and the results are predominantly US contests. Add the fact that the US has a 40% obesity rate and is known for the huge food portions and endless rivers of refills of sugary drinks, what do you expect?
The obesity rate grows every year. And you're always hearing about someone who has stage 4 cancer and hadn't been to a doctor in years.
First off, when talking about the obesity rate, understand it. Most people think that poor food choices are the only cause for obesity. It's not. In my case, it was caused by California doctors who were sexist pigs. For the last 8 years I have been dealing with debilitating pain in my hip and back. In year 6, it was discovered that I had a fractured pelvis. Over the course of those years, I have been given all kinds of medicines to alleviate my pain. Because I was a zombie from all of those meds and because of those meds in and of themselves, I gained weight. It had nothing to do with what I was eating because I was eating healthy. Our healthcare is super expensive and the doctors are c**p quality therefore we have people who will refuse to go to the doctor and end up with stage 4 cancer. Learn before you criticize what you don't know.
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This is funny 'cause you're like "I take care of my health" and someone would pop out of nowhere to point that "You know, my grandad never stopped smoking and he lived to be 99 years old" :I
Because of this, USA has the most Covid deaths and severe illness of all the developed countries. And the lack of proper healthcare insurance of course, but if you eat and live healthy, you have a huge advantage healthwise.
Just wish it would WHACK the bad haired Orange skinned fella. Like yesterday.
You can throw being proud of not having universal health care too. It's some bizarre twist of being #1, the Greatest Country on the Face of the Earth, the country everyone else wants to live in. You can live the worst kind of life and feel that everyone envies you and wants what you got because you're an American.
I'd rather die at 60 eating what I want enjoy the things in life than eat rabbit food and die at 75. I guess it's different for some people. Myself I dont care if die in my 60s and more people feel that way than you think. If u believe in the afterlife all is good. Different strokes for different folks.
This is nonsense, pride in being unhealthy, proudly not exercising. Health system is screwed up but this other stuff is stupid and incorrect.
The adverts and way americans go on about food in tv shows seems to show a pride. And the embrace your body stuff - whilst it's great to feel comfortable however you look, it does seem to mean "ignore the fact that severe obesity is likely to kill you - be proud!"
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The crazy giant gaps in bathroom stalls. It drives me insane. My partner told me that it's there to prevent people from doing drugs/having sex. But I still don't understand why I need to see everyone while I poop.
I'm from Israel.
Keeping my shoes on when walking into someone's home. I feel like a barbarian
Same here!! I find it so weird in movies that they're in the house with their shoes still on. I'm like, give your feet a break ffs!!
There is a toot-your-own-horn culture here in my experience that I find hard to deal with, especially in the workplace. It's not usually a typical someone saying they're good at something, it's more about making themselves out to be better and top-dog.
I'm from the UK and I'd say we are kind of modest.
Also, writing the date, I just can't get used to writing it with the month first.
Tipping culture is so alien to me as an Australian. I always over-tipped because I was never sure — some people would react like I'd made their day for what I thought wasn't a big tip. Coincidentally, I forgot to tip a bartender once and I was made to feel like the worst person ever
Pledge of allegiance. There's literally no other country that I've ever been to that does this! This is so strange and I feel so uncomfortable whether or not I do it.
Using the word "patriotic" in a good way. Seriously, I'd always thought it meant "blindly loving your country and think it's the best", which that definition would fit a lot of Americans better.
Not a social custom, but when i returned from my study abroad in Europe back to the US, I realized how enormous everything is here. The houses, cars, stores, drinks, food portions, and unfortunately many of the people.
Saying "hi how are you?" to strangers and nobody actually answering the question.
The size of food serving when going out to eat.
Thanksgiving and black friday.
And lastly, the fact that every form I have to fill out, they ask my race.
I guess these are not technically social customs, or maybe they are, but I find all of the above very strange. Ugh, I'll never get used to living here.
I always wonder about that race thingy. If a person has three Caucasian grandparents and one African-American - are they supposed to check the African-American box? Why? The Caucasian box? Both? These would be logical for me. Or is it depending on their looks? But then, everyone in the family could be different.
The politicization of everything
Drives a lot of people from here nuts too. I can't tell you how many times I've yelled at someone that wearing a mask isn't a political issue.
That Fahrenheit nonsense. I just never bothered to learn, always converted to Celsius, and then I ended up moving to Canada. I knew it would pay off to never learn.
A friend of mine is Russian. Her parents came to Russia and were still getting used to America. In Russia when you are pulled over by the police you get of the car and walk over to them. Her dad got pulled over and so he got out and started walking towards them. He didn’t know you are supposed to stay in the car. He learned that lesson very quickly.
He didn’t die they didn’t even shoot at him. He did get arrested though.
Sounding like someone cares about you or your answers when they talk, when all they really care is following their scripts, for tip, sales revenue, door sales etc. The tipping culture. Why tell a burger costs $9.99 when with tax you are supposed to pay $11.25 and are supposed to tip at least 20% to not seem like a cheapskate? When the waitstaff works for under $3 a hour... just make it $15 and pay adequately, please
My wife is an immigrant so I'll pass on that she struggled with.
The way many American families raise their children until age 18, then send them out the door to make it or beak it in the world. In many other countries, you never stop helping your children by paying for more education (Vo-Tech or college/university) and trying to avoid student loans, they always have a place to live free of rent, and are quite involved in everyday life of the parents, even if just by phone.
I can't imagine not helping my child when he's over 18. I'm his mother. He can be 60 (and I'll be 77 lol) and I'll still help him.
I moved to Minnesota two years ago. At first I thought I would make friends super easy because people where really friendly but I soon learnt that nobody wanted to make friends. I was mistaking people’s inquisitive nature and need to overshare for genuine friendship foundation laying. I’m from the UK and usually if someone asks you for a beer and chat they want to get to know you, here in the US I’m just an interesting story to tell their real friends about. I found this upsetting at first, but I stopped caring and I did actually make a few good friends in the end.
The alcohol laws, in the UK you can drink in private from a very young age as long as you have parental consent and can have one beer/cider/glass of wine in a restaurant as long as you have a meal with it. In America, I tried to hand a pint to my Dad from a bar and the barman started shouting at me telling me to put it down because I wasn’t 21
But you could join the army and "liberate" some country and in the process kill as many people as you want.
How hard it is to make friends in the USA. It seemed pretty easy from where I came (Europe), but after 20 years in the USA, I still don't have friends here.
I've lived here my entire life, and other than my sister, I have no real friends. Acquaintances, but no friends.
I still don't know how to get invited to parties, so there's that.
Also the drug TV ads with the long disclaimers while showing video of happy people living their lives. Really weird.
I'm from New Zealand.
Lack of vacation days.
Weird health system tied to employment.
Food portions.
Otherwise it is a pretty easy adjustment.
Pounds. Ounces. Feet. Miles. I could never get the hang of it.
That fake condescending voice people use. I'm not a toddler looking for his mama; talk like a normal person.
Not only an American problem. In my country it's a way of speaking that a lot of people in the medical profession use. "You may now take off your shirt so I can examine you." I always answer like: "Well thank you, your majesty, should I kneel and bow down to your mighty stethoscope? "
The lack of irony in general. And the way most people take themselves very very seriously. Don’t get me wrong, life is hard (especially in the US), but I’ve met VERY few people in the US who can make fun at their own expense - which is considered the norm where I’m from. Not saying one is better that the other - just the biggest difference for me
Town and school spirit are a very big thing here. No one takes high school sports this seriously back in my old school in India
No one takes high school sports this seriously in the entire world. Being a professional cheerleader? Only in the US.
Sales tax not being included in the price (got pretty used to it after 4 years, but it still occasionally caught me off guard).
Healthcare bills.
Tailgating on highway (even people complaining about tailgaters were themselves often tailgating).
Porch sitting, people sitting on their porch and watching passers by.
Distances (drove coast to coast, I thought it would never end).
Most men being pretty knowledgable about cars.
Drive thru ATMs, never stopped being funny to me for some reason.
What's weird about porch sitting and knowing about cars? One is relaxing and the other is super helpful.
People saying they will pray for me. Either in aggression to insult me by saying I need to be prayed for (as sometimes I can be an a-hole or a victim of prejudice). Or, they are trying to be empathetic when told of a sad/unfortunate situation. Of course, I don't ever doubt that they'll remember.
Younger Ppl calling adults by (just) their first name. I'm from the Caribbean so can't help but referring to ppl as Mr or Ms. Even if Im familiar with them.
This just depends on where you are. Where I am everyone is Sir or Ma'am, regardless of age. Calling people you are familiar with by Mr. or Ms. "their name" is up to that person, some people feel it makes them sound older than they want to feel so prefer to be called by just their first name.
According to my parents, it was people giving them thumbs up.
In their country of origin, thumbs up = middle finger in the US. So they kept jumping thinking they were being flipped off by random people. Took years for them to get used to it and understand no one was trying to insult them.
It is impossible to have a conversation about anything not being perfect in this country without people going ‘oh but in China it is so much worse’ ‘oh but it is like that everywhere in the world’, ‘we are the beacon of democratic light’, or similar.
Most commonly from people who effectively know very little about the rest of the world, and take their own propaganda as knowledge.
Can't count the times that I was told by Americans that Europeans only have their social welfare system, cheap education and free healthcare because we pay at least 70% of our income on taxes and the government can come any time, day or night, and take all of our belongings away, including house, car and all our savings. The irony is that that's exactly what could happen to US citizens if they need some medical treatment.
Very attentive customer service. It felt almost psychotic.
Because they are monitored and can lose their job in the wink of an eye. No matter how insane, unreasonable, aggressive or rude the customer is, they have to be polite and try to solve problems that can't be solved if the customer refuses to cooperate.
I'm Canadian and the few times I've been to the states it surprised me how many Americans eavesdrop on conversations then insert themselves into it like they were there the whole time.
My first week in the country I went to a house party where I said c*nt casually in conversation. I’m not joking when I say everyone stopped their conversations and stared at me. One girl was properly glaring at me and then told me to apologize to the person I was talking about. Cue my Australian friend starting to piss herself and both of us having to explain to a room full of people that it wasn’t meant offensively.
Not hugging, kissing on cheek, or handshake when saying hi to family. I’m from South America.
As a woman when I first moved to the US, I felt like there was something wrong with me because I didn’t do my nails, or color my hair, or wear makeup like my friends did. The way I grew up, women who were not celebrities didn’t do stuff like that at that frequency. I felt like maybe I wasn’t feminine enough because those things seemed so tied to femininity.
Being extremely loud and extroverted at all times. Making sure my voice echoes loudly even when talking with someone right next to me. That's the hardest to get used to because I come from a modest place.
why sunglasses are blurred? If face is showing through, editors could've just darken it, lol
Carpet everywhere. I thought at first I had that beige, slightly too fluffy standard-issue carpet in my first apartment because it was cheap and in a [crappy] area. Moved to a nicer place, still carpet. Visited relatives who have a really nice 5BR house in the best part of town: the same carpet! Add to that what someone already posted, that people don't take their shoes off, I am still bewildered. And don't get me started on the carpet at high traffic public spaces, like banks, offices, and even /airports/! What. The. Fudge.
Flags everywhere.
Asking how we're doing rhetorically and being burdened by having to listen to the answer.
Bragging about working while being sick as a dog
Bragging about avoiding doctors/medical care
MLMs
"Bragging about working while being sick as a dog." Because not showing up gets you fired. "Bragging about avoiding doctors/medical care." Because they can't afford it.
Billboards with lawyers to hire - everywhere.
Once saw a comic about a car crash were the paramedics had to fight their way to the injured through masses of lawyers. I guess some of it must have some truth in it.
That an appetizer is an entree & an entree is a main.
and the actual meal is like a huge plate that i cant even finish, my grandma and my mom went to olive garden and my grandma felt as full as she would ever be with only the soup they give as a complimentary appetizer. she took everything else to go and ate leftovers for like 3-4 days straight
If you don't pronounce words exactly like Americans do they just flat out don't understand. My native language is English but I have to pronounce thirty in a very specific way for it not to be interpreted as fifty. In general Americans are very ignorant of phrases from other parts of the world (more so than other countries) and struggle to make the connection unless it's an American phrase.
I really want to know how you manage to mangle thirty into fifty.
Talking about the price of gas as a greeting. Just straight up walk to someone with different plates. "Oh hey. You're from Iowa? What's a gallon cost?" "2.044; better than you guys." "Well yeah, it's Cali. You're lucky to find $3.044!" Laughs.
I'm from Canada and this is like us asking each other about the weather.. It's goddamn fascinating to watch happen.
In the UK weather is the number one small talk topic. If you've got nothing else to say it is always hotter, colder, wetter, drier than normal!
Everyone waves. Wasn’t sure why. Did they think they knew me? Did they need help?
A 19th century holdover. If you do not wave, you might be aiming a gun...and that leads to other issues.
How it's not normal to take the piss out of your friends and even causal acceptances
They don't have a bidet!!!!! I don't know how all these centuries have washed their asses! I can't live without a bidet, I never realized how essential it was to my life, my hygiene, and my comfort until I arrived in the USA and I realized that they have nowhere to wash their ass !!! Of course, there is the shower but the bidet is a thousand times better
New Zealand is also guilty of this. I mean, I‘d rather have Jacinda’s covid response than a bidet, but the bidet was very convenient.
The TV ads claiming to support your arthritis but a side effect is death.
Illegal in Europe. We do have ads for over the counter medicines, but that's it.
It is almost like the United States is a separate country with its own traditions and customs. Who would have thought???
There's a bit too many of these "ooh American traditions are weird" posts. We get it, people do things differently in different countries. Who could've known? S**t, even Buzzfeed varies it up by highlighting the customs of other countries. And they're Buzzfeed.
I would love to learn more about the 'weird' traditions in other countries. The US may be different to other countries (though aren't they all?!) but most of them are well known through TV, Films and books.
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Interesting post, but it would be A LOT better if the entries were about different countries. There's no reason to focus only on the U.S.A in a non-American international community, don't you think? The world is big and beautiful, why waste it on things we already know?
Not just that, but... this is like the fifth post I've seen about "Weird Things Americans do." We know... we get it... it's old story. I'm fine informing people about what is going on in the U.S., but I don't see why it has to be the focus of weird cultural things every time. Just reminds me how sh*tty our country is, stop bloody reminding me.
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Just another Americans are dumber than the rest of the world. The all, instead of some, bugs me.
Yep, and every comment pointing out what's exaggerated or untrue gets downvotes.
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Ok so what I am getting from all the comments is that basically anyone who is from another country other than the US is bitching at how we do things and cannot and/or will not accept them. HOWEVER if we dare come to your country, we better do things how you do it or else! Bottom line folks is that if you come to the US, you already know we do things different via the internet, just accept it and learn it. Quit complaining. We are not changing because you think it's weird or confusing or a disgrace or whatever negative adjective you can concoct. Accept it and move on with your life.
A lot of these (the majority) are just made up c**p these people have seen on the internet and mindlessly regurgitate.
Granted I'm from the US, but it seems people are pretty bitter about being here. It's unfortunate. There are good and bad people everywhere, sometimes finding the joy is a personal choice.
Jeez Panda, we get it. America is rude, crude, weird, and just terrible in general. Everyone else is damn near perfect.
So, my takeaway is, if I go out to eat in any other country, I'd better prepare for what I'd call a kid's meal in the US.
So I'm not Slovak because I've never visited the home country of my great-grandparents?
As an American, I'm used to all the "so called" odd habits of Americans. But, if it's so distasteful, why do people rush to come here and have been doing this for many, many years. Stay in your own country where you like everything.
We have a saying here in America, “Delta is ready when you are!” If you don’t enjoy our non-uniform culture and yes, even our screwed up non-metric system of measurement, fly to another part of the country. I assure it will be different. And, if all else fails, fly your sorry a*s back home. There are literally million who would like to take your place.
It is almost like the United States is a separate country with its own traditions and customs. Who would have thought???
There's a bit too many of these "ooh American traditions are weird" posts. We get it, people do things differently in different countries. Who could've known? S**t, even Buzzfeed varies it up by highlighting the customs of other countries. And they're Buzzfeed.
I would love to learn more about the 'weird' traditions in other countries. The US may be different to other countries (though aren't they all?!) but most of them are well known through TV, Films and books.
Load More Replies... Interesting post, but it would be A LOT better if the entries were about different countries. There's no reason to focus only on the U.S.A in a non-American international community, don't you think? The world is big and beautiful, why waste it on things we already know?
Not just that, but... this is like the fifth post I've seen about "Weird Things Americans do." We know... we get it... it's old story. I'm fine informing people about what is going on in the U.S., but I don't see why it has to be the focus of weird cultural things every time. Just reminds me how sh*tty our country is, stop bloody reminding me.
Load More Replies... Just another Americans are dumber than the rest of the world. The all, instead of some, bugs me.
Yep, and every comment pointing out what's exaggerated or untrue gets downvotes.
Load More Replies... Ok so what I am getting from all the comments is that basically anyone who is from another country other than the US is bitching at how we do things and cannot and/or will not accept them. HOWEVER if we dare come to your country, we better do things how you do it or else! Bottom line folks is that if you come to the US, you already know we do things different via the internet, just accept it and learn it. Quit complaining. We are not changing because you think it's weird or confusing or a disgrace or whatever negative adjective you can concoct. Accept it and move on with your life.
A lot of these (the majority) are just made up c**p these people have seen on the internet and mindlessly regurgitate.
Granted I'm from the US, but it seems people are pretty bitter about being here. It's unfortunate. There are good and bad people everywhere, sometimes finding the joy is a personal choice.
Jeez Panda, we get it. America is rude, crude, weird, and just terrible in general. Everyone else is damn near perfect.
So, my takeaway is, if I go out to eat in any other country, I'd better prepare for what I'd call a kid's meal in the US.
So I'm not Slovak because I've never visited the home country of my great-grandparents?
As an American, I'm used to all the "so called" odd habits of Americans. But, if it's so distasteful, why do people rush to come here and have been doing this for many, many years. Stay in your own country where you like everything.
We have a saying here in America, “Delta is ready when you are!” If you don’t enjoy our non-uniform culture and yes, even our screwed up non-metric system of measurement, fly to another part of the country. I assure it will be different. And, if all else fails, fly your sorry a*s back home. There are literally million who would like to take your place.
