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To put it simply, gatekeeping is an act when someone takes it upon themselves to decide who does or does not have access or rights to a community or identity ("You can't be a real Phoebe Bridgers fan, you just discovered her. Real fans follow her since at least Stranger in the Alps.") If this sounds ridiculous to you, don't worry. You're not alone.

There's a subreddit called r/GatesOpenComeOnIn and it describes itself as the polar opposite of gatekeeping. Created in 2018, this online community collects and shares pictures of wholesome acts of kindness when people had each other's backs. Whether it's encouraging everyone to share their Spotify Wrapped or simply allowing someone to feel tired, it doesn't take much to acknowledge another person's emotions, thoughts, experiences, values, and beliefs. Continue scrolling and check out how it's done.

#1

Wholesome Patriotism

Wholesome Patriotism

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As you can see from the pictures, empathy goes a long way. Developing it is crucial for establishing relationships and behaving compassionately. Since empathy involves experiencing another person’s point of view, rather than just one’s own, it enables prosocial or helping behaviors that come from within, rather than being forced.

Sadly, some surveys indicate that empathy is on the decline in the United States and elsewhere. But at least these findings motivate parents, schools, and communities to support programs that help people of all ages enhance and maintain their ability to walk in each other’s shoes.

#2

Halloween For Everyone!

Halloween For Everyone!

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#3

Come On In And Long As You’re Nice

Come On In And Long As You’re Nice

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troufaki13
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If God created all creatures with his infinite wisdom, why would he hate something that HE created?

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Empathy really is a superpower: it helps us cooperate with others, build friendships, make moral decisions, and intervene when we see others being bullied.

Humans usually begin to show signs of empathy in infancy and the trait develops steadily through childhood and adolescence.

That being said, most people are likely to feel greater empathy for someone like themselves and may feel less empathy for those outside their family, community, ethnicity, or race.

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#6

Minding Your Own Business Is Free

Minding Your Own Business Is Free

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am_c0m0
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Minding our own business would solve a lot of our problems.

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Like other traits, empathy may have evolved with a selfish motive: using others as a "social antenna" to help detect danger. From an evolutionary point of view, creating a mental model of another person's intent is critical: the arrival of an interloper, for example, could be deadly, so developing sensitivity to the signals of others could be life-saving.

Babies display an understanding that people’s actions are guided by intentions and can act on that understanding before they turn 18 months old, including trying to comfort a parent. Advanced reasoning about other people’s thoughts develops around age 5-6.

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Experts say that people high in narcissism, or who have a narcissistic personality disorder, can exhibit empathy and even compassion. However, that ability only goes so far, as ultimately they prioritize their own needs.

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Some researchers believe narcissists can become more empathetic by developing greater self-compassion, which can increase their own feelings of security and self-worth and enable them to open up to hearing others.

#10

Shout Out To The Solo Eaters

Shout Out To The Solo Eaters

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#13

Someone I Went To School With Posted This About Giving Their Son A Unicorn-Themed Birthday Bash. Positive Parenting For The Win

Someone I Went To School With Posted This About Giving Their Son A Unicorn-Themed Birthday Bash. Positive Parenting For The Win

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Zuila
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My boy loves colour pink and red. As soon as he was able to show it to me, I have made him red birthday cake and bought red or pink clothes. He also liked to play with baby doll, toy washing machine and cooking gadgets and we allowed him to play what ever he wanted. That phase has now mostly passed, but red is still his favourite colour.

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"Do a thought experiment," Mark Davis, a professor of psychology who has spent decades studying empathy, said. “Imagine if humans didn’t have the capacity for empathy. What would it mean if, in fact, we never gave a damn about what happened to other people? That’s an almost an inconceivable world."

"As awful a species as we can be — and we certainly have the capacity for terrible things — we’re also capable of some pretty wonderful things, noble things, self-sacrifice."

#14

Family Is A Family Is A Family

Family Is A Family Is A Family

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Julie C Rose
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A while ago someone asked me if I “have a family”. I said yes and was genuinely confused when she started asking me about kids.

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Interestingly, the word "empathy" is relatively new. It didn’t enter the English language until the early 1900s, derived from the German word einfühlung, according to Daniel Batson, a researcher of empathy and professor emeritus at Kansas University.

#18

Felt Like This Might Belong Here

Felt Like This Might Belong Here

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MauKini
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband doesnt find my jokes funny, but he cracks up when i cant finish the joke because im laughing so hard.. I love him!

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#19

It's The Thought That Counts

It's The Thought That Counts

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#20

Never Too Late For New Beginnings

Never Too Late For New Beginnings

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While some people are more naturally empathetic than others, there are easy, evidenced-based exercises that anyone can do to increase their empathy. 

First, talk to new people. Trying to imagine how someone else feels is often not enough. Luckily, the solution is simple: ask them. "For me, the core of empathy is curiosity," Jodi Halpern, a psychiatrist and bioethics professor at the University of California, Berkeley, who studies empathy, told The New York Times. "It's what is another person’s life actually like in its particulars?”

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#21

We Are All Nerds Together

We Are All Nerds Together

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Roxy Eastland
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can completely relate to this. I love it when I discover that a friend that I've known for years has an in depth knowledge on a subject I never suspected.

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#23

Good Guy Owner

Good Guy Owner

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MauKini
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love this. In Germany it is forbidden by the law to look for food in supermarket dumpsters. As long as the food doesnt pose a safety hazard, the food should be donated (which some supermarkets do, but its only a few plus they have to pay tax for the food which they are donating, so not many do this).

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You can start conversations with strangers or invite a colleague or neighbor you don't know well to lunch. But the trick is to go beyond small talk – ask them how they're doing and what their daily life is like.

Put away your phone and other screens when you’re having conversations, even with the people you see every day, so you can fully listen and notice their facial expressions and gestures.

Also, follow people on social media with different backgrounds than you have (different race, religion, or political persuasion). 

#25

Stress Relief

Stress Relief

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Hans
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And do not geet engaged into ridiculous competition. You do not need to have read the full History of Middle-earth to enjoy watching the hobbit. (You should, though, before criticising supposed plot-holes.)

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#26

Money Is Power, But Also Not

Money Is Power, But Also Not

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Marianne
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Also when the minimum wage rises, you can hope that other employers will also offer more, to give people a reason to stay in their job instead of taking an 'easier' minimum wage job.

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#27

Better Late Than Never

Better Late Than Never

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Nat Hedley
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Dude in my graduating class (back in 1997) was 84 years old at the time of his graduation. Learn like you'll live forever, it's never too late.

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But don’t just stand in someone else's shoes, as the saying goes—take a walk in them. For example, consider attending someone else's church, mosque, synagogue, or other houses of worship for a few weeks while they attend yours, or visit a village in a developing country and volunteer.

If you don't have enough time for these activities, you can simply explore a new neighborhood, or strike up a conversation with a homeless person in your community.

If someone’s behavior is bothering you, think about why. Consider what it’s like to live their daily life.

#29

Gay Pride Can Be Whatever You Want/Need It To Be

Gay Pride Can Be Whatever You Want/Need It To Be

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#31

How Lovely

How Lovely

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Zuila
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Thank you for this! Kids will never learn how to behave or communicate with others if they can't be at public places. My kids usually behave very well, but can be quite loud.

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#32

Showing Respect For One Another’s Professions

Showing Respect For One Another’s Professions

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Roxy Eastland
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a weird comment. Don't we all love the person that turns up at our doorstep with our eagerly awaited parcel??

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Judy LaFontaine
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They're all jobs that need to be done. Be it mail carrier, garbage collector, or plumber. If nobody worked those jobs, how do we get our packages, keep our homes/property neat and clean, or fix that sewage problem? I'm thankful someone is willing to take those jobs.

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Something
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

For some reason, people interpreted my earlier comment as though I meant that parcel delivery workers are not valuable. That is the opposite of what I actually said. Parcel delivery workers contribute more directly to society than workers such as CEOs and marketing professionals.

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kjorn
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

i don't want to be a waiter. but i have the most respect for those who work as waiter because it's a freaking hard job to do! and most of all underpaid for the job they do

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Aayse
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

who is going to bring your food when you order? If you do not respect his profession then go out and get your own order. I am quite sure you'd be complaining about why there is not stuff for delivery and leave a comment to a restaurant for bad service. So make your mind

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Mary Hilton
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Once had an ex boyfriend tell me my job(helping run my family's restaurant)wasn't a real job. Kicked his ass out...

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Lyn Moffett
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Especially through Covid. These delivery guys are heroes to some people.

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JJ Mondello
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Abso-frickin-luty. Shut the hell up with your disrespect of hard working people,

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JD Lee
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I look forward to the delivery guys/ladies more than I do Santa.. or even my husband. I certainly like them better than the stuffed shirts & politicians in my city.

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Berlinda Dunbar-Nye
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We all have to make a living. However, whatever, my though is if your doing a job, do it well, best you can. If you want to move on do it if life and circumstances permit. I know, sometimes you are where your. Never be ashamed of doing something well and taking care of you and yours.

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Sigmand Froid
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That commenter is rubbish. How can you not like a delivery guy, for anything- Pizza, when you are hungry, Amazon, UPS, etc etc. What a judgy bonehead. I hope he is the CEO of other CEOs

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Kate DiLiberto
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Without people who deliver packages, we would have to travel far and wide every time we saw something cool on Etsy. I can't request a few days off of work because I want to go buy a decorative tile from an artisan in Sicily. I am grateful to the people who pass it along the route to my front door!

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Crochet lady
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Too many people are snobs and turn their noses up at the very people who keep their lives running smoothly. Had a neighbor I liked at first, then went shopping and out to meals with her a few times and the way she treated the sales people and the waitstaff was mortifying. I kept my distance after that, that's a good sign of what a person is truly like; how they treat others they deem "beneath" them. No one is beneath you, you just have a distorted sense of self.

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J
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Be proud to be working and earning a wage, everyone deserves respect for this.

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Caroline Overill
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Where the heck would we be without all these great people during covid?

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Matt Richardson
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's a year round Santa Claus. Don't belittle the dudes who bring me my online orders. They're awesome

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Christine Temple
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We have learned through the pandemic that service jobs are essential jobs. Take pride that you have helped society through a bad time. Without you, we'd be screwed. $15 minimum wage at least. You are the foundation.

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Meami
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you have a job, it doesn't matter what it is. What matters is that you are showing up and contributing to society. Every job matters.

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Crescent Dragonwagon
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Deliverymen and deliverywomen are my heroes! Day after day these fantastic people climb my stairs and deposit whatever at my door. And I never even see them to say thank you...so thank you!!

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EQXL
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This doesn't feel complete without the comment(s) above it.

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Kristof De Smet
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

what would we all have done without the delivery guy in these strange covid times? They deserve every praise!

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El Dee
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes, there's too much of this and also, the phrase 'he's ONLY a [insert job title]'

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Leo Domitrix
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was raised to be ashamed of having no job, not of having a job.

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Quinn Alexander
Community Member
3 years ago

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Something
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3 years ago

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Great pay and benefits don't make being a package delivery guy something to be proud of. Working at a profession that actually provides value to society does.

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Ozacoter
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Because parcel delivery people have zero function in our society. Oh wait... they are crucial nowadays.

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Remember, you don't need to understand everything about someone to make them feel respected. Just don’t make assumptions about people based on what your life is like. The people on this list certainly haven't.

We’re all humans, and we all have a desire to connect with one another. Building our empathy, considering the perspectives of others, and opening ourselves to uncomfortable conversations can make that happen.

#35

You Get To Decide How You Define Being "Grownup"

You Get To Decide How You Define Being "Grownup"

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Something
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why would a saleswoman at a furniture store not want to sell furniture?

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#37

Taking Care Of Your Mental Health Is Important

Taking Care Of Your Mental Health Is Important

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#38

We’re All In This Together

We’re All In This Together

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WilvanderHeijden
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A lot of people do make it their business to decide what other people should earn, how and where they should live and why they shouldn't have universal healthcare. They're called Republicans.

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#39

Ok Zoomer

Ok Zoomer

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Marianne
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Smartphones are the library of Alexandria? Wow, I have to remember this one!

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#40

They Had Us In The First Half

They Had Us In The First Half

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Karl Baxter
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I find it amazing that some Christians arrogantly think that their religion somehow “owns” marriage. People were getting together and pairing up in a variety of rituals 1000s of years before Christianity turned up.

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#43

Speak Everything

Speak Everything

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#44

Learning Is Awesome

Learning Is Awesome

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Marianne
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Also my favorite ones! And I love to talk about them to whoever cares to listen. ;)

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#46

You’re Doing Just Fine

You’re Doing Just Fine

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Roxy Eastland
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This stupid meme also failed to recognise that to develop skills and side hustles we really benefit from the support of friends and family. Hanging out and chatting enables our brains to get things in to perspective, sort out what we've learnt so far, and subconsciously start to work on what is to come next.

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#48

Gonna Remember Who Spoke To Me And Who Didn’t

Gonna Remember Who Spoke To Me And Who Didn’t

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#49

Accept Everyone And Respect Their Decisions Y’all

Accept Everyone And Respect Their Decisions Y’all

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#50

Do Whatever Makes You Happy

Do Whatever Makes You Happy

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