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To put it simply, gatekeeping is an act when someone takes it upon themselves to decide who does or does not have access or rights to a community or identity ("You can't be a real Phoebe Bridgers fan, you just discovered her. Real fans follow her since at least Stranger in the Alps.") If this sounds ridiculous to you, don't worry. You're not alone.

There's a subreddit called r/GatesOpenComeOnIn and it describes itself as the polar opposite of gatekeeping. Created in 2018, this online community collects and shares pictures of wholesome acts of kindness when people had each other's backs. Whether it's encouraging everyone to share their Spotify Wrapped or simply allowing someone to feel tired, it doesn't take much to acknowledge another person's emotions, thoughts, experiences, values, and beliefs. Continue scrolling and check out how it's done.

#1

Wholesome Patriotism

Wholesome Patriotism

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As you can see from the pictures, empathy goes a long way. Developing it is crucial for establishing relationships and behaving compassionately. Since empathy involves experiencing another person’s point of view, rather than just one’s own, it enables prosocial or helping behaviors that come from within, rather than being forced.

Sadly, some surveys indicate that empathy is on the decline in the United States and elsewhere. But at least these findings motivate parents, schools, and communities to support programs that help people of all ages enhance and maintain their ability to walk in each other’s shoes.

#2

Halloween For Everyone!

Halloween For Everyone!

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#3

Come On In And Long As You’re Nice

Come On In And Long As You’re Nice

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troufaki13
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If God created all creatures with his infinite wisdom, why would he hate something that HE created?

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Empathy really is a superpower: it helps us cooperate with others, build friendships, make moral decisions, and intervene when we see others being bullied.

Humans usually begin to show signs of empathy in infancy and the trait develops steadily through childhood and adolescence.

That being said, most people are likely to feel greater empathy for someone like themselves and may feel less empathy for those outside their family, community, ethnicity, or race.

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#6

Minding Your Own Business Is Free

Minding Your Own Business Is Free

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am_c0m0
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Minding our own business would solve a lot of our problems.

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Like other traits, empathy may have evolved with a selfish motive: using others as a "social antenna" to help detect danger. From an evolutionary point of view, creating a mental model of another person's intent is critical: the arrival of an interloper, for example, could be deadly, so developing sensitivity to the signals of others could be life-saving.

Babies display an understanding that people’s actions are guided by intentions and can act on that understanding before they turn 18 months old, including trying to comfort a parent. Advanced reasoning about other people’s thoughts develops around age 5-6.

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Experts say that people high in narcissism, or who have a narcissistic personality disorder, can exhibit empathy and even compassion. However, that ability only goes so far, as ultimately they prioritize their own needs.

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Some researchers believe narcissists can become more empathetic by developing greater self-compassion, which can increase their own feelings of security and self-worth and enable them to open up to hearing others.

#10

Shout Out To The Solo Eaters

Shout Out To The Solo Eaters

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#13

Someone I Went To School With Posted This About Giving Their Son A Unicorn-Themed Birthday Bash. Positive Parenting For The Win

Someone I Went To School With Posted This About Giving Their Son A Unicorn-Themed Birthday Bash. Positive Parenting For The Win

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Zuila
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My boy loves colour pink and red. As soon as he was able to show it to me, I have made him red birthday cake and bought red or pink clothes. He also liked to play with baby doll, toy washing machine and cooking gadgets and we allowed him to play what ever he wanted. That phase has now mostly passed, but red is still his favourite colour.

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"Do a thought experiment," Mark Davis, a professor of psychology who has spent decades studying empathy, said. “Imagine if humans didn’t have the capacity for empathy. What would it mean if, in fact, we never gave a damn about what happened to other people? That’s an almost an inconceivable world."

"As awful a species as we can be — and we certainly have the capacity for terrible things — we’re also capable of some pretty wonderful things, noble things, self-sacrifice."

#14

Family Is A Family Is A Family

Family Is A Family Is A Family

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Julie C Rose
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A while ago someone asked me if I “have a family”. I said yes and was genuinely confused when she started asking me about kids.

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Interestingly, the word "empathy" is relatively new. It didn’t enter the English language until the early 1900s, derived from the German word einfühlung, according to Daniel Batson, a researcher of empathy and professor emeritus at Kansas University.

#18

Felt Like This Might Belong Here

Felt Like This Might Belong Here

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MauKini
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband doesnt find my jokes funny, but he cracks up when i cant finish the joke because im laughing so hard.. I love him!

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#19

It's The Thought That Counts

It's The Thought That Counts

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#20

Never Too Late For New Beginnings

Never Too Late For New Beginnings

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While some people are more naturally empathetic than others, there are easy, evidenced-based exercises that anyone can do to increase their empathy. 

First, talk to new people. Trying to imagine how someone else feels is often not enough. Luckily, the solution is simple: ask them. "For me, the core of empathy is curiosity," Jodi Halpern, a psychiatrist and bioethics professor at the University of California, Berkeley, who studies empathy, told The New York Times. "It's what is another person’s life actually like in its particulars?”

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#21

We Are All Nerds Together

We Are All Nerds Together

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Roxy Eastland
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can completely relate to this. I love it when I discover that a friend that I've known for years has an in depth knowledge on a subject I never suspected.

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#23

Good Guy Owner

Good Guy Owner

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MauKini
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love this. In Germany it is forbidden by the law to look for food in supermarket dumpsters. As long as the food doesnt pose a safety hazard, the food should be donated (which some supermarkets do, but its only a few plus they have to pay tax for the food which they are donating, so not many do this).

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You can start conversations with strangers or invite a colleague or neighbor you don't know well to lunch. But the trick is to go beyond small talk – ask them how they're doing and what their daily life is like.

Put away your phone and other screens when you’re having conversations, even with the people you see every day, so you can fully listen and notice their facial expressions and gestures.

Also, follow people on social media with different backgrounds than you have (different race, religion, or political persuasion). 

#25

Stress Relief

Stress Relief

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Hans
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And do not geet engaged into ridiculous competition. You do not need to have read the full History of Middle-earth to enjoy watching the hobbit. (You should, though, before criticising supposed plot-holes.)

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#26

Money Is Power, But Also Not

Money Is Power, But Also Not

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Marianne
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Also when the minimum wage rises, you can hope that other employers will also offer more, to give people a reason to stay in their job instead of taking an 'easier' minimum wage job.

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#27

Better Late Than Never

Better Late Than Never

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Nat Hedley
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Dude in my graduating class (back in 1997) was 84 years old at the time of his graduation. Learn like you'll live forever, it's never too late.

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But don’t just stand in someone else's shoes, as the saying goes—take a walk in them. For example, consider attending someone else's church, mosque, synagogue, or other houses of worship for a few weeks while they attend yours, or visit a village in a developing country and volunteer.

If you don't have enough time for these activities, you can simply explore a new neighborhood, or strike up a conversation with a homeless person in your community.

If someone’s behavior is bothering you, think about why. Consider what it’s like to live their daily life.

#29

Gay Pride Can Be Whatever You Want/Need It To Be

Gay Pride Can Be Whatever You Want/Need It To Be

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#31

How Lovely

How Lovely

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Zuila
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Thank you for this! Kids will never learn how to behave or communicate with others if they can't be at public places. My kids usually behave very well, but can be quite loud.

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#32

Showing Respect For One Another’s Professions

Showing Respect For One Another’s Professions

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Roxy Eastland
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a weird comment. Don't we all love the person that turns up at our doorstep with our eagerly awaited parcel??

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Remember, you don't need to understand everything about someone to make them feel respected. Just don’t make assumptions about people based on what your life is like. The people on this list certainly haven't.

We’re all humans, and we all have a desire to connect with one another. Building our empathy, considering the perspectives of others, and opening ourselves to uncomfortable conversations can make that happen.

#35

You Get To Decide How You Define Being "Grownup"

You Get To Decide How You Define Being "Grownup"

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Something
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why would a saleswoman at a furniture store not want to sell furniture?

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#37

Taking Care Of Your Mental Health Is Important

Taking Care Of Your Mental Health Is Important

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#38

We’re All In This Together

We’re All In This Together

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WilvanderHeijden
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A lot of people do make it their business to decide what other people should earn, how and where they should live and why they shouldn't have universal healthcare. They're called Republicans.

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#39

Ok Zoomer

Ok Zoomer

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Marianne
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Smartphones are the library of Alexandria? Wow, I have to remember this one!

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Isaac7lego
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

this is the only post I sorta disagree with.....people are on there devices to much myself included. I saw a couple on a date and they were completely ignoring each other and looking at their phones.......just saying.

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troufaki13
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It would have made more sense if they were standing in front of a picture and searching for info on their phones. They could be viewing anything really.

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Johnny
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Many museums have QR Codes next to the painting that you can scan to find more background information.

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Thomas
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They could be doing whatever they feel like, but getting dumber by the minute on TikTok is also a possibility. The poster doesn't want to vilify cellphones but the phone addicts show that their well-being can be compromised by them. To me youth phone use is a cause for concern (and I'm a geek)

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Salty Old Woman
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I disagree. People used to (and still sometimes do) extoll the virtues of reading. But they don't discern anything about the material. A lot of the classics that I was forced to read in school were God-awful, and taught me nothing. They read like soap operas. Which is not a bad thing, but it's not going to make you smarter. Same thing goes for tv and cell phones. There's enriching and learning material. There's entertainment.There's pure garbage (the Kardashians). It all depends on what you choose.

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Kari Panda
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Even if they were just checking FB or tumblr or anything - you are allowed to take a break from a museum tour. It can be exhausting, and why wouldn’t you refill your energies before you continue learning?

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Freddie The Sort Of OK
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If they were reading about the painting, they would at least be facing it.

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JJ Mondello
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Having been involved in situations like this one, can’t say I absolutely agree. Unfortunately, people (young or old) often are now lost in their phone while the most amazing parts of life surround them and they miss it.

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Sophie P
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How does the commenter know that they're on the museum app, though?

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tmw
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I do have a complaint about this picture, however. I hate going to galleries and museums and having to wear my jacket b/c of a fee at the coat check. I sweat and overheat and have to leave early b/c it is so uncomf. These kiddos look like they are comf but I wish coat checks were free.

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Wandaluzt
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why should they pay a member of staff to check your coat in and sit there guarding it and take responsibility for it? Especially if they let you in for free.

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Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Or maybe they don’t like art. Who cares. They’re like 14. Maybe they’ll like it later. I LOVE art and art museums and I’d just be glad they aren’t crowding my view.

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Jonathan Hsieh
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

People say phones is what makes the Gen Z the stupidest. First of all, we are not the stupidest. Second, if WE are so stupid, and you are supposedly so much smarter, then how come it was your responsibility to teach us? Third, just give the phones to those who will handle them responsibly. I know I just spontaneously created an argument out of thin air, but still, I think what I think, and if you disagree, then don't wast time trying to change my mind (did I mention that people think Gen Z is the most passive aggressive?).

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Nadine Vansant
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

probably using Artify to learn everything there is about to know about a certain painting!

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Toni Palmer
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I tend to think IF that were correct they would be facing the painting, reading and looking up to understand the inferences. I'm guessing they could be doing something else.

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bill marsano
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OK, that's possible. But in fairess you have to ask yourself "what are the odds?"

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Alex Hamilton
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If I don't know, I usually ask the computer. It very rarely fails to answer.

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I'm lay sheep in China
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mum be like: u r what u r for that goddamn phone u hv been holding whole day

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OMEGA
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

no, the library of Alexandria burned down, losing all of the knowledge therin

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James F. Wilson Jr.
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Or they are being like 80% of young people, using their phones and not their eyes and heads to learn. Also, how would you know what they are doing Heather as you are not looking at the screens of their phones? I bet you that 10 to 1 you are wrong.

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Laura Mende
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And even if they do, everyone should mind their own business. Maybe it's a boring field trip. Not everyone is interested in art. I think it's good that the girls are silent and other visitors can admire the art in peace. Thank you!!! 👍

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LeighAnne Brown-Pedersen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I know what’s wrong with the pic...the guy in blue.. his shirt is inside out.

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S T
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Who gives a f**k what they're doing? It's not any of our business, and why did this guy take a picture of them? Let them live their lives

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Houssem Hammami
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The first thing I thought about before reading the response was : why are they not practicing social distancing, I think I stayed in my house for faaaaar too long

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Kate DiLiberto
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What's wrong with this picture? They are wearing their coats inside. They will be freezing when they go back out!!!!! But, the smartphones are a fine, handy tool for learning and enrichment!

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Bender Bending Rodríguez
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You might be hypocrite if you agree with tweet reply on "Minding Your Own Business Is Free" and @bettemidler on this post.

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Sasha Kuleshov
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I do see something wrong, the paintings have no glass to avoid people breathing on them :P

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Sean Egan
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Maybe they are waiting for the rest of their group? Maybe the end of their field trip is over and this is their meeting place? Maybe they've been walking around an art museum and are tired, isn't that what a bench is for?

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Aldhissla VargTimmen
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I do this! Some paintings have such awesome backstories! If you want one look up "the judgement of Cambysses" painted by Gerard David

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#40

They Had Us In The First Half

They Had Us In The First Half

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Karl Baxter
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I find it amazing that some Christians arrogantly think that their religion somehow “owns” marriage. People were getting together and pairing up in a variety of rituals 1000s of years before Christianity turned up.

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#43

Speak Everything

Speak Everything

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#44

Learning Is Awesome

Learning Is Awesome

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Marianne
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Also my favorite ones! And I love to talk about them to whoever cares to listen. ;)

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#46

You’re Doing Just Fine

You’re Doing Just Fine

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Roxy Eastland
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This stupid meme also failed to recognise that to develop skills and side hustles we really benefit from the support of friends and family. Hanging out and chatting enables our brains to get things in to perspective, sort out what we've learnt so far, and subconsciously start to work on what is to come next.

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#48

Gonna Remember Who Spoke To Me And Who Didn’t

Gonna Remember Who Spoke To Me And Who Didn’t

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#49

Accept Everyone And Respect Their Decisions Y’all

Accept Everyone And Respect Their Decisions Y’all

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#52

Very Positive Message I Saw Scrolling Through IG

Very Positive Message I Saw Scrolling Through IG

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#53

Sorry. I Just Had To. It's Too Nice

Sorry. I Just Had To. It's Too Nice

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#54

Let People Live!

Let People Live!

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maia martin
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

also, cisgender people can put their pronouns in their bio in order to be more welcoming to people who are transgender/nonbinary :)

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#55

We All Handsome

We All Handsome

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#56

If It Makes You Happy

If It Makes You Happy

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Roxy Eastland
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have the same thing about children's names. Call your child whatever you damn well want and the rest of us will be sure to teach our kids not to be playground bullies

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#58

Dad Knows Best

Dad Knows Best

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#61

Sizes

Sizes

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Roxy Eastland
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Never got the lack of love for smaller guys. Some of the cutest guys I've ever known have been shorter than me.

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#63

Come On In! Keep Trying

Come On In! Keep Trying

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Laugh or not
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wrong, you should care that someone is trying to learn a new skill: help them if you can and they ask, encourage them if they need, and be in awe of personal growth.

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#65

Do What You Like

Do What You Like

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*screamsinbisexual*
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes! This is so important!!!!!! I love video games but I’m absolute garbage at them so easy mode is a lifesaver haha

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#68

Gotta Clean Up

Gotta Clean Up

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#69

Girl In Red's Music Is For Everyone

Girl In Red's Music Is For Everyone

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Watching
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"I like tits but my bops are for everyone" is my new mantra. And I'm not a lesbian.

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#72

Everyone Deserves The Right To Complain

Everyone Deserves The Right To Complain

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#73

Nobody Cares If You Can’t Dance Well. Just Get Up And Dance

Nobody Cares If You Can’t Dance Well. Just Get Up And Dance

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#74

Melon Flavored Jellyfish's Mom Says The Gates Are Open

Melon Flavored Jellyfish's Mom Says The Gates Are Open

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#75

I Decided To Make Some Original Content, Am I Doing It Right?

I Decided To Make Some Original Content, Am I Doing It Right?

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Roxy Eastland
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I wish it was more universally understood that when a child is crying and reacting over 'some little thing' it is literally their whole world at that moment. Yes, even if they want something and can't have it, they are just shaken up by the dissonance inside themselves. How adults react to them teaches them buckets. Sympathy with the feelings would be a good and honest start. And there's nothing wrong with saying 'well, let's rethink if you can have it' either.

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#76

Nice To See This

Nice To See This

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MauKini
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

also, if id attempt to work on my car it would probably be worse after.. Also: How on earth did he take this picture?

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#77

We Are All Just Humans Trying To Make It To Tomorrow

We Are All Just Humans Trying To Make It To Tomorrow

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#78

For Those That Might Not Have Known, And Those That Know But Needed To Hear It All The Same

For Those That Might Not Have Known, And Those That Know But Needed To Hear It All The Same

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#80

One Of My Favorite Tweeters With His Gates Wide Open!

One Of My Favorite Tweeters With His Gates Wide Open!

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#83

We’ve All Been There

We’ve All Been There

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#84

We’re All In This Bumpy Sweaty Party Together

We’re All In This Bumpy Sweaty Party Together

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#85

Ian Opining The Gates

Ian Opining The Gates

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#86

Gym Doors Open, Come Inside

Gym Doors Open, Come Inside

lulz1996 Report

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Ian Koch
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

yes. I'm so underweight (77 or so when I should weigh 90-ish, I'm almost 14, my birthday is March 27!) that I had to get a blood draw to see if my digestive system worked properly, we're still waiting on the results but I think I'm ok.

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#87

I Swear To God

I Swear To God

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#89

What Counts As Traveling?

What Counts As Traveling?

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IzzieM
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If I leave my city... I'm claiming it as traveling. Whoop, road trip!!! ...to the next town over.

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#90

Spotify Wrapped

Spotify Wrapped

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#91

Fixed It

Fixed It

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Logic and Reason
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

For context, the original had the man replying with ‘I’m a soldier on Call of Duty’.

#92

A Little Advice For The Ladies

A Little Advice For The Ladies

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