ADVERTISEMENT

To put it simply, gatekeeping is an act when someone takes it upon themselves to decide who does or does not have access or rights to a community or identity ("You can't be a real Phoebe Bridgers fan, you just discovered her. Real fans follow her since at least Stranger in the Alps.") If this sounds ridiculous to you, don't worry. You're not alone.

There's a subreddit called r/GatesOpenComeOnIn and it describes itself as the polar opposite of gatekeeping. Created in 2018, this online community collects and shares pictures of wholesome acts of kindness when people had each other's backs. Whether it's encouraging everyone to share their Spotify Wrapped or simply allowing someone to feel tired, it doesn't take much to acknowledge another person's emotions, thoughts, experiences, values, and beliefs. Continue scrolling and check out how it's done.

#1

Wholesome Patriotism

Wholesome Patriotism

EpicJenko Report

As you can see from the pictures, empathy goes a long way. Developing it is crucial for establishing relationships and behaving compassionately. Since empathy involves experiencing another person’s point of view, rather than just one’s own, it enables prosocial or helping behaviors that come from within, rather than being forced.

Sadly, some surveys indicate that empathy is on the decline in the United States and elsewhere. But at least these findings motivate parents, schools, and communities to support programs that help people of all ages enhance and maintain their ability to walk in each other’s shoes.

#2

Halloween For Everyone!

Halloween For Everyone!

bunman21 Report

#3

Come On In And Long As You’re Nice

Come On In And Long As You’re Nice

thefamilyjewelz Report

Add photo comments
POST
popapach avatar
troufaki13
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If God created all creatures with his infinite wisdom, why would he hate something that HE created?

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

Empathy really is a superpower: it helps us cooperate with others, build friendships, make moral decisions, and intervene when we see others being bullied.

Humans usually begin to show signs of empathy in infancy and the trait develops steadily through childhood and adolescence.

That being said, most people are likely to feel greater empathy for someone like themselves and may feel less empathy for those outside their family, community, ethnicity, or race.

ADVERTISEMENT
#6

Minding Your Own Business Is Free

Minding Your Own Business Is Free

Thoeda Report

Add photo comments
POST
am-vautour avatar
am_c0m0
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Minding our own business would solve a lot of our problems.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

Like other traits, empathy may have evolved with a selfish motive: using others as a "social antenna" to help detect danger. From an evolutionary point of view, creating a mental model of another person's intent is critical: the arrival of an interloper, for example, could be deadly, so developing sensitivity to the signals of others could be life-saving.

Babies display an understanding that people’s actions are guided by intentions and can act on that understanding before they turn 18 months old, including trying to comfort a parent. Advanced reasoning about other people’s thoughts develops around age 5-6.

ADVERTISEMENT

Experts say that people high in narcissism, or who have a narcissistic personality disorder, can exhibit empathy and even compassion. However, that ability only goes so far, as ultimately they prioritize their own needs.

ADVERTISEMENT

Some researchers believe narcissists can become more empathetic by developing greater self-compassion, which can increase their own feelings of security and self-worth and enable them to open up to hearing others.

#10

Shout Out To The Solo Eaters

Shout Out To The Solo Eaters

benImran17 Report

#13

Someone I Went To School With Posted This About Giving Their Son A Unicorn-Themed Birthday Bash. Positive Parenting For The Win

Someone I Went To School With Posted This About Giving Their Son A Unicorn-Themed Birthday Bash. Positive Parenting For The Win

frauenarzZzt Report

Add photo comments
POST
zuila1990 avatar
Zuila
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My boy loves colour pink and red. As soon as he was able to show it to me, I have made him red birthday cake and bought red or pink clothes. He also liked to play with baby doll, toy washing machine and cooking gadgets and we allowed him to play what ever he wanted. That phase has now mostly passed, but red is still his favourite colour.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

"Do a thought experiment," Mark Davis, a professor of psychology who has spent decades studying empathy, said. “Imagine if humans didn’t have the capacity for empathy. What would it mean if, in fact, we never gave a damn about what happened to other people? That’s an almost an inconceivable world."

"As awful a species as we can be — and we certainly have the capacity for terrible things — we’re also capable of some pretty wonderful things, noble things, self-sacrifice."

#14

Family Is A Family Is A Family

Family Is A Family Is A Family

ElanMorinMetal Report

Add photo comments
POST
julie_rose_translator avatar
Julie C Rose
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A while ago someone asked me if I “have a family”. I said yes and was genuinely confused when she started asking me about kids.

charlottestewart avatar
Salty Old Woman
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Right? As though you have no parents, siblings, significant other, or anyone else.

Load More Replies...
emberstonepierce avatar
Ember
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I’ve always believed that your family are those you surround yourself with who love and care for you and don’t have to be related by blood at all. We can all choose our families and let go of the toxic trouble makers.

sonja-szabrotska avatar
lightningandthunder avatar
El is so weird (s)t(he)y
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love my relatives and parents and my little sister (she’s my favorite person) but my real family is all of my theater friends. They’re so accepting and funny and we all would fight for each other and there my family. :)

Load More Replies...
sarahcollins76 avatar
SarahScouse
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This hit hard. Im currently redecorating our kitchen and almost bought a cute little plaque today that read 'our family makes this house a home' but I put it back on the shelf. My partner and I have been trying for a baby for nine years and have been through 7 rounds of IVF and two miscarriages so its just us and the dog. I hope that plaque is still there when I can get back to the shop because I'm going to buy it and hang it on my wall with pride. I feel like this post is a sign.

shiritoru avatar
Shiritoru
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I wish you to fulfill all your dreams. And yes, you are already a family. Go get this sign and be happy.

Load More Replies...
rweaver-boredpanda avatar
Johnny
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Was at a family event once (large family reunion) and an aunt kept telling one of my cousins that he's spending too much time with his roommates (a guy and a girl) and he needs to go out and get a girlfriend. He had too much of her "advice" and explained that one roommate is his girlfriend and the other one is his boyfriend, then explained what "polyamorous" meant. The aunt was strangely silent the rest of the day.

veni_vidi_vicky avatar
Vicky Zar
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Brilliant. Now I would love to see my twin aunts reaction to something like this. They are smartestes and super religious. No kids but a load of advice for everything.

Load More Replies...
barborabobkov avatar
no_name
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I do have a family. I have parents, grandparents, sister, bunch of cousins, aunts and uncles and I could keep going like that

jaylar24 avatar
Jessica B
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I always considered having kids as less "starting" (already technically had family) and more another way to "grow" your family.

shrimpman76 avatar
Nicklas Linder
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A guy, a green woman, a man with weird red tattoos on grey skin, a woman with feelers on her forehead, a raccoonbadger and a tree is definitely a family.

jaybird3939 avatar
Jaybird3939
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My cat and I are currently estranged. Until she realizes jumping and meowing at 5:00 a.m. will NOT result in treats, we are at odds. Day 4, but I'm sure reconciliation will be coming soon.

cruzarts avatar
Steve in Denver
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And here are families by birth and families of choice, as so many have found out when their parents rejected them.

obrenovicmarijela avatar
Dark Pearl
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'd say me and my crazy friends are a family. I love them all like family <3

carmenstanca avatar
Carmen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's only in English. The definition of "family" is quite different in the other languages I know.

isoldekyialoikyi avatar
Iso
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

that weirdly close roommates part feels very very specific...

stacy avatar
Fixin'Ta
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My oldest brother lived in a different town from the rest of us (Mom, Dad, me, and other brother) for most of his adult life. His two marriages didn't last, so he formed really tight bonds with a few good friends. When he got colorectal cancer at age 64, my parents and I were unable to come take care of him (lived too far away), but his friends totally stepped up to the plate. One couple took him in while he was going through chemo and surgeries. Others drove him to the chemo center or brought him food. When he was in his last days, my father was able to go spend time with him, but couldn't stay overnight as he had to get back home to my mom (elderly and frail). So it was one of his closest friends who was by his side when he passed away. We were so very grateful he had this other family-of-friends who could be there with him and for him. He didn't have to go through any of that alone. His friends are proof that family isn't always blood, but the people who love you and care about you.

malagotelli avatar
Javiera Gotelli
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's one of the many ways religions ruined society. To most religions, a family consists of marriage+kids, and it's embedded in every society. Sometimes more or less, but every single country has been ruined by religion on some degree

ozzier3d avatar
Ozzie Ogawa
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"When will you start a family?" "Oh, i already have a family." "Who?" "Me, my dad, my mom, my brother, my sister, my cousins, my uncles, my aunts, my nephews, my nieces, my friend, and my cat."

lunanik avatar
Nikki Sevven
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Family also can include your adult children. My family is myself, my adult daughter, and two dogs.

kanrrykang avatar
KK
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I consider fellow musicians who I've worked with past and present to be family. Family, this day of age, can honestly be interpreted in many different ways.

ilonazoomer avatar
LesAnimaux
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

THIS. I have a cat and am very much a complete family. No, I do not call her my daughter, because she is a cat. But she's f a m i l y

aysekeles avatar
Aayse
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

whenever I hear this, I assume they are jealous of my comfortable life. I am quite happy in my own way

sergiobicerra avatar
Sergio Bicerra
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm not sure everytime someone asks you this is meant maliciously. Assuming that is kindda toxic, don't you think?

Load More Replies...
View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT

Interestingly, the word "empathy" is relatively new. It didn’t enter the English language until the early 1900s, derived from the German word einfühlung, according to Daniel Batson, a researcher of empathy and professor emeritus at Kansas University.

#18

Felt Like This Might Belong Here

Felt Like This Might Belong Here

calysoe Report

Add photo comments
POST
bea_hettlage avatar
MauKini
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband doesnt find my jokes funny, but he cracks up when i cant finish the joke because im laughing so hard.. I love him!

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#19

It's The Thought That Counts

It's The Thought That Counts

Scraw16 Report

#20

Never Too Late For New Beginnings

Never Too Late For New Beginnings

manupuwaga Report

While some people are more naturally empathetic than others, there are easy, evidenced-based exercises that anyone can do to increase their empathy. 

First, talk to new people. Trying to imagine how someone else feels is often not enough. Luckily, the solution is simple: ask them. "For me, the core of empathy is curiosity," Jodi Halpern, a psychiatrist and bioethics professor at the University of California, Berkeley, who studies empathy, told The New York Times. "It's what is another person’s life actually like in its particulars?”

ADVERTISEMENT
#21

We Are All Nerds Together

We Are All Nerds Together

Night_skye_ Report

Add photo comments
POST
roxy_eastland avatar
Roxy Eastland
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can completely relate to this. I love it when I discover that a friend that I've known for years has an in depth knowledge on a subject I never suspected.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#23

Good Guy Owner

Good Guy Owner

oscarfacegamble Report

Add photo comments
POST
bea_hettlage avatar
MauKini
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love this. In Germany it is forbidden by the law to look for food in supermarket dumpsters. As long as the food doesnt pose a safety hazard, the food should be donated (which some supermarkets do, but its only a few plus they have to pay tax for the food which they are donating, so not many do this).

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

You can start conversations with strangers or invite a colleague or neighbor you don't know well to lunch. But the trick is to go beyond small talk – ask them how they're doing and what their daily life is like.

Put away your phone and other screens when you’re having conversations, even with the people you see every day, so you can fully listen and notice their facial expressions and gestures.

Also, follow people on social media with different backgrounds than you have (different race, religion, or political persuasion). 

#25

Stress Relief

Stress Relief

DailyWally Report

Add photo comments
POST
crabcrab avatar
Hans
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And do not geet engaged into ridiculous competition. You do not need to have read the full History of Middle-earth to enjoy watching the hobbit. (You should, though, before criticising supposed plot-holes.)

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#26

Money Is Power, But Also Not

Money Is Power, But Also Not

VoxorHD Report

Add photo comments
POST
mariannekraus avatar
Marianne
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Also when the minimum wage rises, you can hope that other employers will also offer more, to give people a reason to stay in their job instead of taking an 'easier' minimum wage job.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
See Also on Bored Panda
#27

Better Late Than Never

Better Late Than Never

VoxorHD Report

Add photo comments
POST
kifflington avatar
Nat Hedley
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Dude in my graduating class (back in 1997) was 84 years old at the time of his graduation. Learn like you'll live forever, it's never too late.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

But don’t just stand in someone else's shoes, as the saying goes—take a walk in them. For example, consider attending someone else's church, mosque, synagogue, or other houses of worship for a few weeks while they attend yours, or visit a village in a developing country and volunteer.

If you don't have enough time for these activities, you can simply explore a new neighborhood, or strike up a conversation with a homeless person in your community.

If someone’s behavior is bothering you, think about why. Consider what it’s like to live their daily life.

#29

Gay Pride Can Be Whatever You Want/Need It To Be

Gay Pride Can Be Whatever You Want/Need It To Be

squeakim Report

#31

How Lovely

How Lovely

holliepoetry Report

Add photo comments
POST
zuila1990 avatar
Zuila
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Thank you for this! Kids will never learn how to behave or communicate with others if they can't be at public places. My kids usually behave very well, but can be quite loud.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#32

Showing Respect For One Another’s Professions

Showing Respect For One Another’s Professions

coleonoscopy Report

Add photo comments
POST
roxy_eastland avatar
Roxy Eastland
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a weird comment. Don't we all love the person that turns up at our doorstep with our eagerly awaited parcel??

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

Remember, you don't need to understand everything about someone to make them feel respected. Just don’t make assumptions about people based on what your life is like. The people on this list certainly haven't.

We’re all humans, and we all have a desire to connect with one another. Building our empathy, considering the perspectives of others, and opening ourselves to uncomfortable conversations can make that happen.

#35

You Get To Decide How You Define Being "Grownup"

You Get To Decide How You Define Being "Grownup"

DancingAndrovski Report

Add photo comments
POST
breakmyheart avatar
Something
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why would a saleswoman at a furniture store not want to sell furniture?

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
See Also on Bored Panda
#37

Taking Care Of Your Mental Health Is Important

Taking Care Of Your Mental Health Is Important

huracanEVO Report

#38

We’re All In This Together

We’re All In This Together

KingOfNiFe Report

Add photo comments
POST
bp_10 avatar
WilvanderHeijden
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A lot of people do make it their business to decide what other people should earn, how and where they should live and why they shouldn't have universal healthcare. They're called Republicans.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#39

Ok Zoomer

Ok Zoomer

HipstaBarista Report

Add photo comments
POST
mariannekraus avatar
Marianne
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Smartphones are the library of Alexandria? Wow, I have to remember this one!

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#40

They Had Us In The First Half

They Had Us In The First Half

RsquaredT Report

Add photo comments
POST
kb0569 avatar
Karl Baxter
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I find it amazing that some Christians arrogantly think that their religion somehow “owns” marriage. People were getting together and pairing up in a variety of rituals 1000s of years before Christianity turned up.

View more commentsArrow down menu
#43

Speak Everything

Speak Everything

blazinfastjohny Report

#44

Learning Is Awesome

Learning Is Awesome

MagnetOfWeird Report

Add photo comments
POST
mariannekraus avatar
Marianne
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Also my favorite ones! And I love to talk about them to whoever cares to listen. ;)

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#46

You’re Doing Just Fine

You’re Doing Just Fine

RedGalDread Report

Add photo comments
POST
roxy_eastland avatar
Roxy Eastland
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This stupid meme also failed to recognise that to develop skills and side hustles we really benefit from the support of friends and family. Hanging out and chatting enables our brains to get things in to perspective, sort out what we've learnt so far, and subconsciously start to work on what is to come next.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
See Also on Bored Panda
#48

Gonna Remember Who Spoke To Me And Who Didn’t

Gonna Remember Who Spoke To Me And Who Didn’t

CodePurple_ Report

#49

Accept Everyone And Respect Their Decisions Y’all

Accept Everyone And Respect Their Decisions Y’all

smol_catto_ Report

#50

Do Whatever Makes You Happy

Do Whatever Makes You Happy

Gingold Report

Note: this post originally had 92 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.