The holiday season is in full swing, and we feel like it’s the best time of the year to remember how wholesome, kind, supportive, welcoming, and selfless people can truly be, despite their perceived differences. That’s why we’re featuring the ‘Gates Open, Come On In’ subreddit, an online community of nearly 340k people today.
The online group presents itself as the exact opposite of r/gatekeeping and features folks being true legends who accept others no matter who they are, instead of angry gremlins who don’t want to let anyone new into their communities. Scroll down for some of the best anti-gatekeeping posts and hard proof that people really do have each others’ backs when push comes to shove.
Pssst, Pandas, if you’re looking to restore some more faith in humanity, then you’ll definitely want to check out Bored Panda’s previous article about some more great real-life anti-gatekeeping examples. You can read it right here.
British psychotherapist Silva Neves shared with Bored Panda his take on why some people feel the need to act as gatekeepers at all. "The theory is that it comes from our inner sense of survival. At times when we lived in tribes, it was part of survival to fear people outside of the tribe because they might have been a threat to the tribe," he explained to me. "In our modern world, to some extent, we have kept that sense of survival, although unnecessary now, but still subconsciously strong."
However, Silva notes just how much impact even small gestures of kindness can have. "When we learn to be kind to others, we're actually learning to be kind to ourselves. We need both." Scroll down for to read what he had to say about this.
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"We don't often realize that a very small gesture of kindness, even just a smile to a stranger, can trigger a chain of kindness and love to their social circle, and the ripple effects can be felt to the greater society," psychotherapist Silva shared with Bored Panda the power that even a small act of kindness can have in the world around us. In fact, we're naturally hard-wired to help others.
Everyone (Saw This Posted Somewhere Else On Reddit So Thought It'd Be Worth The Cross-Post)
Marry Whomever You Wish
"Being kind and helpful is a natural high for us, as it produced feel-good brain chemicals, so it tends to make us happier. Seeing others happy can also produce feel-good chemicals. So it is all round a very good thing for physical and mental health to be kind to ourselves and others," he said.
"If we do that, we tend to live happier lives and, even if we don't always see it, it is important to remind ourselves that any small gesture of kindness contributes to a kinder world. And, right now, the world needs a lot more kindness."
I Just Like Animals
We Can All Get Along!
Everyone Starts Somewhere
‘Action for Happiness’ explained to me earlier that altruism and kindness are closely linked to our own happiness.
"Think about how you can reach out and do things for others, help a neighbor or volunteer for a cause, we get happiness high from helping other people. Or start small and simply list three things that you can be grateful for each night before bed,” Sarah Vero from ‘Action for Happiness’ shared with Bored Panda.
According to Sarah, the 10 keys to happier living are: “Giving, relating, exercising, awareness, trying out, direction, resilience, emotions, acceptance, and meaning. We are likely to be happier if our lives have direction, meaning, and purpose and if we are part of something bigger than ourselves.”
Depression Gateopening
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Keep Doing What You Like, Support Others Who Do The Sam
Vanessa King, the Head of Psychology at ‘Action for Happiness,’ noted that we’re a social species and that helping others out is part of who we are. Being kind, lending a helping hand are the “social glue that keeps us together.”
“When we do things for others it activates the reward center in the brain, so when we give a gift it feels the same as receiving a gift," Vanessa stressed.
“Small daily actions one at a time can help us to make altruism a lifetime habit. You could start out small by deciding you are going to smile at everyone you meet or pay three people a compliment today,” she said.
You're Not A Product
I have to say the internet ruined quite a few hobbies for me. Going out to find tips and tricks and finding communities full of people who are soooooo much better at it then I’ll ever be, discourages me too much. In “ye old days” I just did whatever I liked and never knew how bad I was at it. So now I just avoid those kind of hobbies online. I’m happier not knowing if I’m good or not :)
I Love This Man More Than Certain Family Members
Damn, son, just wear a crop top and some underpants. Get those wet and you'll get some real attention.
This Is Beautiful
Human beings don’t hold a monopoly on empathy. Plenty of other animals have feelings and have demonstrated that they feel bad for other beings if they’re in trouble. For instance, a while back I wrote about an experiment on rat friendship.
As it turns out, rats help each other out if they sense that they’re distressed. However, they prefer to help rats who are most like them. Scientist Inbal Ben-Ami Bartal told Bored Panda that “rats will help others of their ingroup (cagemates and strangers of the same strain) but not the outgroup (strangers of a black-furred strain they are not familiar with).” In other words, rats are selective in who they help. However, this behavior changes the more familiar rats become with members of their outgroup.
Working People Are My People!
Always keep in mind that your employer is paying you the least amount they feel they can to keep you around(Sure, there are exceptions, but 98% are).
Art Is For Everyone
Humiliation Fetish
“The encouraging thing is that we then found that cohabitation, living with a rat from the other strain for two weeks totally changes this behavior, and now rats will help that cagemate from the other strain. Even more impressively, after living together for two weeks with one rat of the other strain, they will help strangers from the other strain as well,” Bartal said.
The scientist added that social experience is actually what determines whether or not rats help each other, not their genetic similarity. Bartal said that in one case, rats were fostered at birth with those from another strain. “Like Mowgli, they were raised with the other strain and never encountered their own kind. When they grew up, they only helped rats of the adoptive strain, not the biological strain.”
For All Relationships
With Open Arms
You Are All Right
In Bartal’s view, a lot of the discussion on animal empathy gets stuck on semantic issues. “For instance, the definition of empathy, how can we say that animals really feel empathy the same way we do. But empathy is a construct. We don’t even know what it is in humans really!” she said.
“I operate on the assumption that there is an evolutionary continuum between species, and that the basic building blocks of our responses are shared. Being sensitive to distress in others and motivated to care about their suffering is as old as the moment mother and child became connected for survival after birth.”
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Exactly! I almost always play easy mode, because I suck at them, but still enjoy them. Gaming is supposed to be fun, relaxing and a way to escape reality, not a second job! Unless it is your job, of course :D
Ahaha Well said! Honestly, I work in a video games company (localisation) and I play our games in easy mode mostly (depending on which content). I love games, but work can be stressful. And I'm not accepting any work related stress outside of my working hours. ♡
Load More Replies...I only play Sims with all the cheat modes, because my real life is hard enough. Why the heck would I make a game hard for myself as well?
I need a bit of challenge in my game so it doesn't become boring, but I definitely cheat on the money in Sims, because everybody know that building and decorating houses is the best part!
Load More Replies...Normal difficulty for me. Unless I already beat it then I go for hard.
I must be a masochist gamer, I play on hardest but it's not that I am any better at the games than average, I just enjoy being messed up. And the games last longer :D
I'm with you there, i enjoy the challenge but i'm not always good at it. My partner thinks i'm psycho. Different strokes for different folks :D
Load More Replies...Normal for me. I like some kind of challenge but I don't want to be killed every ten seconds.
been a gamer my whole life, but only in my 40's have I been playing games on easier difficulties just to enjoy the story. I've gotten through so many awesome games this way, makes me wonder why was I ever trying so hard before.
And you spend more money buying more games because you get through them quicker, so the game companies make more money. Everyone wins!
Load More Replies...I agree, I am not trying to impress anybody, just explore fantastic and/or scary new worlds.
Maybe if a game is played on easy mode long enough, a player will feel confident enough to try a harder level. Ease into it, I say. But only if you want to.
You can strategize and think it through more on Easy and prepare for tougher settings
Load More Replies...I've been playing Snood for 20? 22? years. My cat loves to watch me play. And I still play on the 'cheesy' level. Because I play for fun.
Yeah I prefer the easy or story mode most of the time. I don't want to be stuck on the same bit for ages, getting pissed off. Even if I do manage to do it in the end that sense of accomplishment is only fleeting. I'd rather be able to chill out in a game instead.
I do it the other way around. Easy while I learn the game mechanics (and if I want to enjoy the storyline, if there is one), then progressively harder modes to create more of a challenge.
Load More Replies...I am convinced that doom on a controller is impossible on any difficulty above easy
I start on the second easiest. Every now and then the game will remind me how well I am doing and challenge to increase the difficulty slightly. It helps find a good balance between fun and rewarding.
Also easy mode is usually exclusive to combat difficulties, you don't get to just passively complete the game. Having fun is winning
Of course, if you really want to get better, you need to challenge yourself. I used to get myself onto servers with 1337 players - totally got my butt handed to me, but when I went back to playing with regular players, I was so much better.
I used to always play on "Normal" because I wanted "the genuine experience". And I usually had fun, but as I started having less time to spend on game I finally caved and started playing some games on easy mode, particularly when they're heavily story based, and you know what? I really don't miss normal mode at all. I still feel like I'm having fun, but now I can focus on the story and my button presses don't have to be perfect, etc.
I usually play on normal difficulty but I use a cheat or two so I don't have to deal with the tedious stuff that sucks the fun out of the game. For example, limited ammo. I just don't want to deal with that. I can deal with it being hard to earn cash in the game to buy gear or whatever but always being stressed about ammo just ruins games for me so I find an unlimited ammo cheat and roll with it.
Most the time I'd rather play games on medium or easy and enjoy it, than challenge myself on a harder setting. Same with games that are easy...easy...easy...HARD BIT...uninstall
I play on Normal, enjoy the story. Then after that is when I go sweaty and try to beat it on hard.
I also read the walkthroughs as I am playing it. I don't got time to be fumbling around.
Hm, but why do you play the games yourself then? I mean, if I find a game interesting, but not worth my time, I watch a playthrough while washing the dishes or read a plot summary.
Load More Replies...This! Also, if the game is timed, there should be the option to play without being timed.
I always do an easy playthrough first to see if it's worth playing, no use struggling with a game you won't even like.
I confess that I sometimes cheat at sudoku when it's a difficult puzzle, lol.
I have enough stress in my life... if I can't cheat or skip things I don't want to do in a game, I play a different game.
I usually play on the default difficulty setting for the first playthrough. If there are collectibles I missed, I might revisit the game on an easier difficulty. If there's a difficulty achievement/trophy I think I can get, I'll play on a harder difficulty. I like that nowadays, games are being released with custom difficulty settings, lne of the most recent examples being Guardians of the Galaxy.
I also disable scores, timers, comparisons to others etc whenever there's an option to do those. I don't give a toss if I ranked before or after nine million strangers, girls just wanna have fuuuu-h-aa-n.
I had a boyfriend who once saw me play one of those built in Microsoft card games. It was my chill pill, I just kept clicking if I felt nervous or overwhelmed and it calmed me down. He got so excited and asked if I can do it without hints and tips, and what's my best time, what's my winning percentage so he can compare it to his. That should've been a real big red flag right there.
Load More Replies...If I'm playing a new game, I do tend to stick to the easy difficulty - I can play on harder modes later when I've learned more about the game and how to play it etc... (but then there was bloodborne and dark souls like games. I think they are actually supposed to be stressfull, but still an experience, and the feeling of accomplishment when finally defeating a boss is fantastic. x3)
I do it’s a hobby nothing is worth getting so worked up about, I never understood why people play games when they end up rage quitting because they can’t do something.
Tried hard mode on l4d once for kicks. 2 seconds into opening the safe room. A hoard with 4 special infecteds and a tank came at me xD
Easy and often with a lot of cheat codes enabled. I don't play enough to be any good but would like to see more of the game. :-)
Shout out (or against...) here for so many modern platform games which look awesome but then are so hard even on easy mode, it's like they only make them for experienced gamers because "They've all played so many of these games, they must really want a challenge..." and I get it, that's fine, but could they not just leave one easy mode in for the noobs?
Indeed. I play for fun and entertainment and neither of these should be stressful.
Anything but fallout i just use regular difficulty, fallout 4 i beat the colter guy at nuka world on level 8 cause the game is flawed
For you perhaps. For others it is nicer to relax and not be killed every second. Let people enjoy what they like without judgement.
Load More Replies...I don't think they are much fun when they are easy. And when the difficulty starts to bug me I always know that it's time to do something else. If that means I'm only playing for ten minutes because I can't stand getting my ass handed to me that day, that's also a win.
Can’t Decide Whether This Belongs Here Or In Humansbeingbros
Have A Seat, Enjoy The View, Everyone Is Welcome
Pros And Cons Of GF...
Anyone Can Play Games
Liberal Arts
Gaming Is For Everyone
My dad never had any sons. He introduced his two daughters to video games and motorcycle racing. I became a lifelong gaming enthusiast, and my little sister bought a motorbike. :D
Respect To You For Doing Anything
Drink What You Like!!!
Spread The Positivity
A Novel‘S Worth Of Nerd S**t
Let People Be Happy
Wholesome Hotel
Let's Just Love Everyone
If anyone wants to continue the heartwarming goodwill, Jewish Voice for Peace is a great organization that supports Palestinian self-determination, supports peace and justice in the Middle East, and stands against anti-Jewish, anti-Muslim, and anti-Arab bigotry.
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Everyone Is Welcome On This Server
Does This Doormat Count?
Vegan BBQ
You're Never Too Old For Success
This Subreddit In A Nutshell. This Applies To So Many Communities
When The Old Becomes New Again
Love Is Always Valid. Assume The Best First!
this! i am truly loved for the first time in my life, and im in my early 40s. its amazing and i want to share that. If you've always had that it might seem a bit lame to post about it, but take a second to consider experiencing it for the first time
Love What You Are
No Beer Is Girly Beer
I Love My Grandma So Much. She Got Her Point Across Without Being Mean To The Family Friend
Can't Argue With Mom!
Like What You Like
You can find men or women attractive and it not be sexual at all...
There's Some Logic There
As A Metal Head, Everyone Is Welcome!
Vent’s Open Come On In
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Play The Game Any Way You Want
Note: this post originally had 79 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.
Lovely post! I agree with them all, and forgive me I know I'll get down voted, but I just don't feel comfortable with gender neutral toilets. For no other reason than the fact there are some real dangerous creeps in this world. It just scares me I guess.
Over 20 years ago I studied in Copenhagen and the school had gender neutral toilets. They still have them and it was absolutely no problem when I was there. What I always wonder, why do apparently a lot of people honestly think a "women only"-sign will somehow keep male rapists out of women's bathrooms? An insane amount of women and girls have already been molested or worse in "their" (public) bathroom by despicable bastards. Men and boys have been molested in their bathrooms by despicable bastards. Most people are decent folks, so don't fear average dudes in your bathroom. It also smells a wee bit of transphobia, too, especially when trans people don't "pass".
Load More Replies...I know this maybe the same post as before but I still want to do it. To all the people reading this: You are beautiful, you are unique, you have so much talents. You are a special protagonist in your story. This may be the end of 2021. If there's any good things happen in your life, keep moving forward because it's not the end of the story, this is a new chapter of your life. If bad things had happened to you, don't stop, keep marching, because you are in your character development story. We may have never meet face to face before, but we are friends that shaking hands and said how do you do, no matter where we are from, what color we have, if we are are part of queer or not or what religions we follow. May your day fill with rainbows
Genuine Q: is there a label for people who don't like labels? No problem with other people doing it if it works for them but I've always struggled to think of myself as anything except just a person and I don't like feeling I have to pick a box and stay in it.
I agree entirely! I remember being in school (a little before gender fluid etc was as present in the media) and going 'I like this, but don't really fit into this group' etc. I don't think you need to label yourself or others, it doesn't effect how I interact with people and why should it? I don't even find job titles something I need to know about people in my personal life.
Load More Replies...You know I find it funny that boredpanda takes a lot of its content from Reddit but practically everyone on Reddit hates boredpanda because if all the liberals lol
Lovely post! I agree with them all, and forgive me I know I'll get down voted, but I just don't feel comfortable with gender neutral toilets. For no other reason than the fact there are some real dangerous creeps in this world. It just scares me I guess.
Over 20 years ago I studied in Copenhagen and the school had gender neutral toilets. They still have them and it was absolutely no problem when I was there. What I always wonder, why do apparently a lot of people honestly think a "women only"-sign will somehow keep male rapists out of women's bathrooms? An insane amount of women and girls have already been molested or worse in "their" (public) bathroom by despicable bastards. Men and boys have been molested in their bathrooms by despicable bastards. Most people are decent folks, so don't fear average dudes in your bathroom. It also smells a wee bit of transphobia, too, especially when trans people don't "pass".
Load More Replies...I know this maybe the same post as before but I still want to do it. To all the people reading this: You are beautiful, you are unique, you have so much talents. You are a special protagonist in your story. This may be the end of 2021. If there's any good things happen in your life, keep moving forward because it's not the end of the story, this is a new chapter of your life. If bad things had happened to you, don't stop, keep marching, because you are in your character development story. We may have never meet face to face before, but we are friends that shaking hands and said how do you do, no matter where we are from, what color we have, if we are are part of queer or not or what religions we follow. May your day fill with rainbows
Genuine Q: is there a label for people who don't like labels? No problem with other people doing it if it works for them but I've always struggled to think of myself as anything except just a person and I don't like feeling I have to pick a box and stay in it.
I agree entirely! I remember being in school (a little before gender fluid etc was as present in the media) and going 'I like this, but don't really fit into this group' etc. I don't think you need to label yourself or others, it doesn't effect how I interact with people and why should it? I don't even find job titles something I need to know about people in my personal life.
Load More Replies...You know I find it funny that boredpanda takes a lot of its content from Reddit but practically everyone on Reddit hates boredpanda because if all the liberals lol