It’s finally time to make it “even Steven” after all these times we've looked at the wholesome couples, best friends, partners in crime, and whatnot messing around together under one roof and wondered what on earth we've done to deserve living alone. We all know how much easier it is to survive the autumn blues, breakups, hard days at work and whatever challenges life throws at you when you have a spare shoulder to cry onto. We know that, okay?
So when someone asked a much-anticipated question “What is a highly underrated advantage of living alone?” on r/AskReddit the loners who don’t share their postcode with anyone saw it as a perfect moment to celebrate just that. The answers started flooding in one by one, showing the joy of simple things like never having to wait for a bathroom and total control over heat and air conditioning.
I mean, you can freely talk to yourself out loud, forget manners and quit politeness, put the responsibilities aside and indulge in the sweetness of doing nothing... Isn't this basically the closest we’ll get to the ultimate freedom in a society where no one feels free anymore?
Every single item in your house is exactly where you left it the last time you used it.
Everything is your own mess. I don't want to clean up after someone, and I don't want to nag someone to clean. Those are all my dishes in the sink to do, or to let sit there for a week. Feels good.
Also, ripping a fart you feel super proud of with no shame or holding back.
Bored Panda spoke with Susan Petang, a certified divorce coach and the creator of “The Quiet Zone Coaching,” who teaches women how to stop feeling overwhelmed and start waking up happy in the morning again. Susan was happy to share some insights on the often overlooked perks of living alone and how we can all make the most of it.
“Sometimes it's really nice to be alone! You don't have to think about the needs of anyone else. You can go to bed whenever you want, and get up when you have to, without accommodating someone else's schedule,” Susan said.
She continued: “Don't want to eat healthy tonight? No problem! Want to have dinner at 11PM? No worries, there's no one else to answer to. You can eat what you like without having to worry about someone else's preferences. You can watch as much TV or play as many video games as you want. If you want to work until 3AM, you can—you don't have to worry about disturbing anyone else. Vacations can be wherever YOU want to go, doing what you want to do.”
There are a lot of advantages but my top is not having to deal with people and their damn problems
I’m an introvert so when I come home, I want to be by myself. Social situations are draining and I can only re-energize by having alone time. I am not antisocial, but I have hidden in my room for hours for my roommate to leave because I don’t want to answer 'How was your day?' for the millionth time
Never having to wait for the bathroom
In fact, Susan describes living alone as “the ultimate in self-care.” She added that “you can plant whatever you want in the garden, take as many candle-lit baths as you want, and read whenever you want without worrying about the needs of someone else.”On the other hand, living alone has some practical downsides. “There is nobody to share the chores with. You and you alone are responsible for taking out the trash, cleaning the cat's litter pan, and walking the dog. If you get sick, there is nobody to help, no one to make you chicken soup.”
Total control over heat/air conditioning. Highly underrated. You can have control over your costs and/or your comfort.
If I want to eat blueberry Eggos for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, no one judges
When you get home, that food you been thinkin about all day long will be there.
Moreover, you're responsible for paying all the bills, argues Susan. “It's always easier with two incomes, and if you lose your job, it can be pretty scary. When you get home from work, there's nobody to share your day with, laugh with, and play with. Sure, you can take a friend on vacation with you, but it's just not the same.” The life coach added that one of the biggest joys in life is doing things for others. “When you live with someone else, you can experience that joy every single day!”
You can walk around with no pants and go to the bathroom with the door open
Being able to nap at the drop of a hat and having the peace and quiet to do so
Dieting is like 400x easier. I know it's a bad excuse, but hear me out. When I'm dieting I won't buy a single junk food item, and I won't eat it since I won't have it. Live with someone who buys tons of junk, especially someone who buys food and doesn't expect you to not eat it, like your parents, and it makes it a lot harder.
Yeah I know it's a bad excuse for breaking diet but it's super easy for me to just never buy junk food and never have it around but it's hard for me to avoid it when I'm living with it
It's no wonder that living alone may get pretty lonely. Susan said that the best way to avoid loneliness is the MGP Method: Mindful, Grateful, Positive. She explained: “Mindful: Instead of regretting the past, or pinning your happiness on some future event (that may or may not happen!), focus on where you are in life right now. We spend 100% of our lives in 'now'! It's OK to reminisce about the past and make plans for the future, but enjoy those when it's appropriate to do them. Focus on what you're doing, sensing, feeling, and observing in this moment. Experience this moment. Be curious about it. Immerse yourself in it—whether or not the moment is good, bad, or indifferent.”
Being able to do whatever you want without consulting someone else first
You can talk out loud to yourself (something I do often as I work from home) and nobody is around to think it's weird
When I lived alone I would clean my place and it would stay clean. Now I clean my place and it is messy again in about 10 minutes, it feels like.
“Grateful: If we're staying focused on this moment, right now, then it just makes sense to make it the best it can be, right? So, what's good about it? What can you be grateful for—no matter how small? Find wonder and awe for trees, rain, snow, and sunshine you see from your window; be amazed by the technology that makes our lives easier, like cell phones, TVs, and computers. Be grateful for the tiniest of 'wins' in your life, like when you remember to take out the trash, have enough money to pay the electric bill, or have enough food for dinner. Make your mantra, 'Something good about right now is...'”
“Positive: Instead of thinking, 'This stinks!' or, 'I really hate being alone,' or 'I'll never find someone to share my time with,' change the Negative Nancy talk in your head into something positive. Instead, think, 'I can watch anything I want on TV,' 'I love being able to eat whenever I want,' and 'Maybe I'll have someone in my life someday, but for now I'm going to enjoy my freedom!'”
You never have to watch terrible movies, wait to use the bathroom or take a shower, you can eat what you want, and you can decorate however you like.
You dont have to tiptoe around the house worried you'll wake up roommates/family members.
So i've been living alone for the last couple of years and to be honest i feel like i want it to stay that way for the rest of my life for the following reasons:
I can make any food i like and if i feel lazy i can eat outside i don't have to answer to anyone or cater to anyone's needs
I just clean the house once per week and it stay squeaky clean for the rest of the week.
I can do whatever i want in my free time sometimes i want to go out and do something interesting other times i want to be a couch potato i do not have to cater to anyone's needs.
Budgeting becomes super easy i manage to save a lot of money and at the same time buy whatever i need.
I have a king size super comfy bed all for me if its too hot i can remove the covers, if it's too cold i can put on as much covers as i need no need to ask someone for their permission.
I can invite any of my friends anytime i want and we can do whatever we want anytime we want.
I work in a stressful career and nothing beats coming home to a nice quiet house and just relaxing and recovering from a stressful work day without having to answer silly questions like how was my day or having to listen to how another persons day went.
These are just a few reasons i thought of the top of my head i am sure i could have come up with more reasons but suffice to say that no matter how much i think about it when i compare my single days to the days i was in a relationship the single days always end up being much better.
Susan explained that it's not being alone that makes you lonely; it's what you tell yourself about it, how you perceive it, that makes you feel bad. “So, who wants to feel bad? Choose to change the way you view being alone. Focus on the benefits and the good parts. Focus on solving the problems that arise from being solo, instead of complaining about them.
Mindfulness + Gratitude + Positivity = Happiness,” the life coach concluded.
If there’s a mess and no one else sees it, is there even a mess?
Not coming home to someone else's dirty dishes in the sink
You can walk around naked 24/7
You know exactly what state your home is going to be in when you arrive back at it
You can basically do whatever whenever without bothering anyone. When I lived with my parents if I showered after like 9pm, you'd think I'd been running around the house playing a keytar or something with how much they complained about the noise the next morning. Plus I don't wake up to anyone else's noise, either.
Sometimes if I wake up while dreaming and I'm super disoriented I think I'm back home and worry that I'm going to hear people walking around, slamming doors, yelling at each other, etc. at some point, then I remember that I'm in my own house, in my own bed, alone with my dogs so I can rest in peace. (Not dead, though, hopefully.)
I think I value living alone a lot more because I grew up with parents that thought screaming at each other every other night was the best way to work out their conflicts. Silence in my house is absolutely golden.
Learning life skills. Paying your bills, cleaning, time management, etc.. You just end up learning these based on experience.
For many years I lived in a full size (3br 2ba)family house all by myself. Freaking LOVED it. My brother lives with me now but that's still super cool. Really the best part is simply not having to deal with people.
Every second is yours. No waste. No waiting on someone else ever. No cleaning up after anyone else. No doing something someone else wants. It's incredibly efficient, unless you're dying.
Knowing exactly where everything is. There's no compromising. All my belongings are in the perfect place
Being able to come and go as you please. Doing stuff at any hour and not worrying.
I like to cook and clean during my productive hours (2-5am), and I like to shop at midnight when noone is about to bug me.
Now living with my husbands family I have to keep to their schedule of up at 8am and asleep at 11pm. I also listen to them argue all day every day, get yelled at in crossfire and have to take care of a three year old.
I much preferred being alone. I am only still here because I love my husband too much to leave, but this is year 5 now, it is rough...
You don't have to politely tell someone you will be out late