Guy Shares His Experience That Made Him Realize How Important Platonic Intimacy Between Men Is
Even though people tend to be kind of forgiving if they see females hugging each other, holding hands or showing other kinds of affection, it’s way harder to discard assumptions about people’s sexuality that instantly pop into most people’s minds if they see men doing the same. Let alone sleeping in one bed! Artist and photographer Dorian “Scottie” Wilson took to Twitter to break the stereotype by sharing a wholesome story. His stand up carries a beautiful message that’s commonly overlooked – male friendships are important and vital. “Manhood, we’re told, leaves little room for the kind of emotional intimacy friendship requires. But men crave that closeness ― even those who do have friends say they wouldn’t mind being closer with them,” said Robert Garfield, a psychotherapist and the author of Breaking the Male Code: Unlocking the Power of Friendship. “While women are more inclined to network with other women and maintain their longstanding friendships, men tend to stash their friendships away like baseball cards,” he added. Knowing this, the example Dorian “Scottie” Wilson shared on Twitter is even more heartwarming. Scroll down to see for yourself!
More info: Twitter | Tumblr | Instagram
Twitter fell in love with Dorian “Scottie” Wilson after he shared this wholesome story, proving platonic male intimacy is possible
Image credits: eyeofscottie
Image credits: eyeofscottie
Image credits: eyeofscottie
Image credits: eyeofscottie
Image credits: eyeofscottie
Image credits: eyeofscottie
Image credits: eyeofscottie
Image credits: eyeofscottie
Image credits: eyeofscottie
Image credits: eyeofscottie
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Italians are macho and kiss each other. Indian men walk around holding hands. Both of those sentences involved two Straight males
For some reason the most macho cultures that are the hardest on gays also do what would be perceived in western countries as gay as hell (like the examples you just gave).
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Yeah it's strange to me when some of the men my parents age get weirded out if a guy tries to hug them. I remember once a man I know actually stopped a male family member (who was probably 6 or 7 at the time) from kissing him and said, "men shake hands". It still bothers me to this day. Men CAN show affection platonically!
As a group, their mental health would be much better off if they did.
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When I was younger I always wondered why my mom hugged people goodbye, and my dad just shook hands with them. I guess I became so used to it that I didn't notice that difference anymore. Men should be able to show affection platonically without facing personal questions.
It's okay to hug whomever you want regardless of gender or sexual orientation. Our society has spent so much time deciding what is gender appropriate behavior that they have forgotten what is human appropriate behavior.
These "no homo" attitudes are also surprisingly modern in nature; men were routinely and platonically cuddly not more than about 100 years ago. Lack of physical affection and deep emotional bonds with other people (including men) is detrimental to men and has caused some trouble in a couple of relationships I know of. Loneliness kills, and men are suffering for no good reason. It's also worth noting that this is not as much of an issue in some parts of the world, and there are many extant cultures where men are routinely affectionate with each other.
https://www.artofmanliness.com/articles/the-history-and-nature-of-man-friendships/
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I used to sleep always with my friends, since elementary school, even in my 30s, in my country the normal working class houses have rooms for the members of the house, but a guest room is not usual, so if not you have an extra bed, friends sleep in the same bed, without any problem or second thoughts about this, we are even very affectionate with the people we love, men hug and kiss when they greet each other, girls give kisses to girls, Guys give kisses to boys, and men to women, and it is not the big deal, it is normal, in some countries it is a great drama physical contact, I find it uncomfortable not to greet and show my affection in the USA in the same way I would do it in Argentina.
I never understood why this would be an issue. Ive slept in bed with all my friends, boys and girls. Nothing ever happened. To me sleeping next to someone is just that, sleeping.
I too remember. I was a straight boy, with no gay emotions. Then A friend slept over and we had really hard buttsex. It just happens I guess. One boner led to another and then...well...you could say it was a touchdown, a homerun, a hole in one...äh...two...a back to back comeback. And if you read until here and feel offended: go get a life. I too "slept" most of my childhood and teen-years (12-19) with my best friend. At some point, when I was 17, my parents started to wonder about our sexuality, as it might have been weird that two dudes spend nearly everyday with each other and sleep in one bed most of the week. But we were just close friends. Funny twist: I actually started to work in a small gay club, when I was 18. Just because I knew one of the staff.guys and needed a job. That of course fired some additional speculations to my sexual preferences. But well....I'm straight and I never cared for what other's might assume. So I can relate to the guy in the story. Felt the same way.
I think kids growing up now are so much more educated , and so much more kind ... and by kids I mean 30 and under 🤣 But seriously, it makes me so proud of what the future holds with people being so woke ❤️
Slept plenty of times with my buddy in a hotel bed hell no way paying for another bed when one big one will do
We're all just mean to our men. We tell them they can't be emotional because that's a woman thing, or a gay thing, and also, gay is a bad thing. Not all women and gay men are emotional, and being gay is not bad.
And they are SO repressed as far as clothes go. Women can wear almost anything now. Men have a much harder time of that.
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I love this story so much and for so many reasons. I would really love it if everyone had this kind of friendship in their lives. Also, it's ok if it's NOT alright with people to be hugged or kissed, or to prefer sleeping on an uncomfortable couch rather than share a bed. I've had friends who were so traumatized by bad experiences that they still slept alone despite being in great relationships because they would be horribly triggered if they were touched while sleeping.
Where anyone sleeps is no one else's business... men who are screwed up about showing affection for other men, platonic or not, got that way from their parents and all that "men" c**p... there are no RULES, follow your heart and leave the a******s behind.
It's actually okay to share a bed with someone. Lots of people do. Nothing sexual needs to happen there. When I was a kid I would always share the bed with one of my brothers at a motel or in the motor home all summer long. It was purely economic.
If girl besties can share a bed together without being judged, why can't guy buddies do the same?? Gender equality is the buzz word past few years right??
What's interesting is that no comments are mentioning the part where the black community doesn't have the same attitudes towards homosexuality as white people do and are far more likely to be against it. If this was a post about white people there's no way that part would be ignored. Just sayin.
I believe it when he says the black community is hardest on LGBTQ than any other ethnic group. A lot, lot, LOT of the black friends that I have are baptist..and they aren't exactly warm and fuzzy about the gay community.
It's a bed, you're pissed and tired. All you wanna do is sleep. It's just being practical. Gay men can share a bed with girlfriends, as can two women and people don't think much of it. It's called sleeping. I get the stigma, but people need to grow up a bit. Good for these guys. Sweet dreams!
Dude, just this past Christmas Eve (2019) several of us crashed at Grandma's house (because it is Grandma's house and it is safe and warm and full of love and who doesn't want to wake up at Grandma's on Christmas morning? I am 46 and two of my girl cousins and I shared a bed, my brother slept in a bed with one of the boy cousins while two more slept on the floor of the same room. We grew up doing this (usually, we would Jonestown it in the living room when we were younger) and just because we are adults doesn't mean that this is suddenly sexual.
Your friend is a good person. I'm bi/(maybe pan) and my best friend is bi but I have a boyfriend and she's not attracted to me like that. Her bed is large and takes up most of her room so we often end up sharing it when I sleepover at her house. I consider her family and just because we are bi dosent mean we are both attracted to the entirety of the female gender.
It's sad to think that guys face so many questions for this.
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It's funny, little kids sharing a bed is fine, wholesome, adolescents not so much, young adults, it's get out of the house. This whole thing (post and comments is so encouraging.
this is precious & very sweet & im so proud of both these guys. <3
I think he's definitely bi sexual (I read an article on this, so I should know).
I understand. I watched all the season of ER and Greys Anatomy, so let me stitch that up for you. ;)
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Italians are macho and kiss each other. Indian men walk around holding hands. Both of those sentences involved two Straight males
For some reason the most macho cultures that are the hardest on gays also do what would be perceived in western countries as gay as hell (like the examples you just gave).
Load More Replies... Yeah it's strange to me when some of the men my parents age get weirded out if a guy tries to hug them. I remember once a man I know actually stopped a male family member (who was probably 6 or 7 at the time) from kissing him and said, "men shake hands". It still bothers me to this day. Men CAN show affection platonically!
As a group, their mental health would be much better off if they did.
Load More Replies... When I was younger I always wondered why my mom hugged people goodbye, and my dad just shook hands with them. I guess I became so used to it that I didn't notice that difference anymore. Men should be able to show affection platonically without facing personal questions.
It's okay to hug whomever you want regardless of gender or sexual orientation. Our society has spent so much time deciding what is gender appropriate behavior that they have forgotten what is human appropriate behavior.
These "no homo" attitudes are also surprisingly modern in nature; men were routinely and platonically cuddly not more than about 100 years ago. Lack of physical affection and deep emotional bonds with other people (including men) is detrimental to men and has caused some trouble in a couple of relationships I know of. Loneliness kills, and men are suffering for no good reason. It's also worth noting that this is not as much of an issue in some parts of the world, and there are many extant cultures where men are routinely affectionate with each other.
https://www.artofmanliness.com/articles/the-history-and-nature-of-man-friendships/
Load More Replies... I used to sleep always with my friends, since elementary school, even in my 30s, in my country the normal working class houses have rooms for the members of the house, but a guest room is not usual, so if not you have an extra bed, friends sleep in the same bed, without any problem or second thoughts about this, we are even very affectionate with the people we love, men hug and kiss when they greet each other, girls give kisses to girls, Guys give kisses to boys, and men to women, and it is not the big deal, it is normal, in some countries it is a great drama physical contact, I find it uncomfortable not to greet and show my affection in the USA in the same way I would do it in Argentina.
I never understood why this would be an issue. Ive slept in bed with all my friends, boys and girls. Nothing ever happened. To me sleeping next to someone is just that, sleeping.
I too remember. I was a straight boy, with no gay emotions. Then A friend slept over and we had really hard buttsex. It just happens I guess. One boner led to another and then...well...you could say it was a touchdown, a homerun, a hole in one...äh...two...a back to back comeback. And if you read until here and feel offended: go get a life. I too "slept" most of my childhood and teen-years (12-19) with my best friend. At some point, when I was 17, my parents started to wonder about our sexuality, as it might have been weird that two dudes spend nearly everyday with each other and sleep in one bed most of the week. But we were just close friends. Funny twist: I actually started to work in a small gay club, when I was 18. Just because I knew one of the staff.guys and needed a job. That of course fired some additional speculations to my sexual preferences. But well....I'm straight and I never cared for what other's might assume. So I can relate to the guy in the story. Felt the same way.
I think kids growing up now are so much more educated , and so much more kind ... and by kids I mean 30 and under 🤣 But seriously, it makes me so proud of what the future holds with people being so woke ❤️
Slept plenty of times with my buddy in a hotel bed hell no way paying for another bed when one big one will do
We're all just mean to our men. We tell them they can't be emotional because that's a woman thing, or a gay thing, and also, gay is a bad thing. Not all women and gay men are emotional, and being gay is not bad.
And they are SO repressed as far as clothes go. Women can wear almost anything now. Men have a much harder time of that.
Load More Replies... I love this story so much and for so many reasons. I would really love it if everyone had this kind of friendship in their lives. Also, it's ok if it's NOT alright with people to be hugged or kissed, or to prefer sleeping on an uncomfortable couch rather than share a bed. I've had friends who were so traumatized by bad experiences that they still slept alone despite being in great relationships because they would be horribly triggered if they were touched while sleeping.
Where anyone sleeps is no one else's business... men who are screwed up about showing affection for other men, platonic or not, got that way from their parents and all that "men" c**p... there are no RULES, follow your heart and leave the a******s behind.
It's actually okay to share a bed with someone. Lots of people do. Nothing sexual needs to happen there. When I was a kid I would always share the bed with one of my brothers at a motel or in the motor home all summer long. It was purely economic.
If girl besties can share a bed together without being judged, why can't guy buddies do the same?? Gender equality is the buzz word past few years right??
What's interesting is that no comments are mentioning the part where the black community doesn't have the same attitudes towards homosexuality as white people do and are far more likely to be against it. If this was a post about white people there's no way that part would be ignored. Just sayin.
I believe it when he says the black community is hardest on LGBTQ than any other ethnic group. A lot, lot, LOT of the black friends that I have are baptist..and they aren't exactly warm and fuzzy about the gay community.
It's a bed, you're pissed and tired. All you wanna do is sleep. It's just being practical. Gay men can share a bed with girlfriends, as can two women and people don't think much of it. It's called sleeping. I get the stigma, but people need to grow up a bit. Good for these guys. Sweet dreams!
Dude, just this past Christmas Eve (2019) several of us crashed at Grandma's house (because it is Grandma's house and it is safe and warm and full of love and who doesn't want to wake up at Grandma's on Christmas morning? I am 46 and two of my girl cousins and I shared a bed, my brother slept in a bed with one of the boy cousins while two more slept on the floor of the same room. We grew up doing this (usually, we would Jonestown it in the living room when we were younger) and just because we are adults doesn't mean that this is suddenly sexual.
Your friend is a good person. I'm bi/(maybe pan) and my best friend is bi but I have a boyfriend and she's not attracted to me like that. Her bed is large and takes up most of her room so we often end up sharing it when I sleepover at her house. I consider her family and just because we are bi dosent mean we are both attracted to the entirety of the female gender.
It's sad to think that guys face so many questions for this.
Load More Replies... It's funny, little kids sharing a bed is fine, wholesome, adolescents not so much, young adults, it's get out of the house. This whole thing (post and comments is so encouraging.
this is precious & very sweet & im so proud of both these guys. <3
I think he's definitely bi sexual (I read an article on this, so I should know).
I understand. I watched all the season of ER and Greys Anatomy, so let me stitch that up for you. ;)
Load More Replies... 
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