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Have you seen Midnight in Paris? The movie is not about the city per se, rather it's about our fascination with it. Woody Allen asks us why the dream of Paris seems more powerful than walking on its streets.

However, it's not just historical European landmarks that infatuate our minds. That cause us to look at the world through an unrealistic lens. No, no, there are many more culprits — we're too easily swayed.

Last week, Redditor u/Buttercuppy44 asked other users, "What's something we need to stop normalizing?" And it turned out to be a discussion we really needed. People straight away came through with plenty of specific and accurate examples.

#1

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Having to respect a damaging point of view because it's part of someone's religion.

No, I don't have to respect your belief that women are inferior or that LGTBQ+ people shouldn't have rights because your religion tells you to believe that. It's a bad point of view.

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Trixypix
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This should be higher up in the list AND it can be extended to every belief in general about 'we' are better then 'them' because of religion/ money/ education/ the place where you live/ the colour of your socks/ etc.etc.

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#2

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Canceling people for things they did 10+ years ago. If someone has shown growth in that time then let them grow.

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Otter
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Huzzah, huzzah! The only thing more ridiculous than cancelling someone for a trivial offense committed years ago, is someone digging through ten years of someone else's social media in search of something to use against them.

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#3

Kids beauty pageants.

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Otter
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not widely considered normal. Considered creepy, disturbing, and exploitative among sane people.

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#4

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Coming to work sick. People tend to get praised for that, but they are in fact just endangering others to get sick as well — and in the end, it costs the company more than if they would've just stayed home.

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#5

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Being rude to retail and food workers. We work hard all day, deal with some of the worst customers bar none, and really don't get paid enough to support families but we do it anyway. For way less than it's worth

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#6

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Ads on stuff you've paid for.

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#7

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Filters that change the shape of your face to fit a beauty standard. Kids are growing up with an even more distorted view of what they should look like than previous generations

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#8

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Taking pictures of strangers without their knowledge and posting it on the internet. It is toxic as hell and it wasn't that long ago it was seen as creepy.

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Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It should be illegal. The last thing I want is for someone to take a photo of me and end up becoming a meme or something.

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#9

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop That anything is possible if you try hard enough. Don't get me wrong, a lot is possible, but not everything. There are factors beyond ourselves that determine our success. The best we can do is to give our best, and be happy that we've done so.

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TheBlackPanda (JustABlackBear)
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hardwork doesn't always lead to success. A lot of people that became successful through "hard work" don't usually include one thing in their success stories: the role of luck. Some of them were lucky to be born in the right place, to the right people, at the right time, happened to go to the right school, happened to make the right friends, etc. For every success story, there are thousands and millions that did the same amount of hardwork and got nowhere. The difference is, those hardworking but unsuccessful people were simply unlucky. No one knows a sure formula for success in life. It's easy to think you do when you've made it.

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#10

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop People being bastards on the internet, because of anonymity.

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#11

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Using religion as a weapon.

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Kesam
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

To me it's more using religion as an excuse (to discriminate, to question science, to explain away EVERYTHING...)

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#12

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop The greed of the top 1% that fuels the pollution and decay of our planet.

Looking at you Jeff, Bill, and Mark

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NsG
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm going to get downvotes here, but you need to swap out Bill for Richard. Yes, Mr Gates has done some deplorable things while gaining his millions. But he has done philanthropic things that the others haven't even considered. Demonstrably tried to improve things for the rest of humanity. The others? No bathroom breaks and trains that barely run at all never mind on time. Oh, and I'm damn sure it wasn't his age that stopped him taking part in the Prick Space Race, so that's a point in his favour too. Dislike or full on loathe him all you want, but he is no longer in the same league of greed and evil as the others. (Mr Zuckerberg is in a league of his own, although he does look like he wants to be Bezos when he grows up, so...)

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#13

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop The idea that being an as*hole is a sign of intelligence. Jerks are rarely intelligent. Sheldon Cooper, Rick Sanchez, Hannibal Lecter, and Dr. House do not exist.

In my experience, being rude and condescending turns out to be a sign of stupidity, not intelligence.

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Anne
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sheldon was actually very true to life for a lot of smart autistic people..but he would be what we would be without adapting skills. And most of us have adapted to our environment.. But he feels rather authentic. He isn't rude or condescending - he just doesn't understand most humans. That's why he follows the rules.. hot beverages for upset humans etc.

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#14

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Throwing cigarette butts on the floor.

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Adam C
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Throwing cirarette butts WHILE protesting for for climate-change.

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#15

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Having an opinion on everything.

It’s okay to look at something on the internet and think to yourself “I don’t have to care about this.”

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Human #1,232,867
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Best time saver, ever... (Oh, why do I put a comment here? I should not care) /s

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#16

Kids doing animal abuse. Stop it with, "they are just kids they don't know any better"

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Luka Verheijen
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If it's too extreme, it's often a sign of a sadistic personality, so more reason to work on that early

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#17

The idea that a woman can slap a man if she's angry at him, but a man should never hit a woman regardless of the circumstances.

The former is assault - hitting people who aren't already involved in a physical altercation is never OK, regardless of the circumstances. The latter ties into that; if you are being attacked, the level of force you use in defence should be dependent on the danger you are in, which has almost nothing to do with the sex of your attacker.

Both of these rely on the tired and sexist trope that women are meek little does who have not the physical strength nor moral turpitude to commit violence against the big, strong, tough men. They normalize assault and abuse and accordingly belong in the dustbin of history.

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Luka Verheijen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Finally someone who adresses this! This double standard bothers me fir a long time. Also, some women who try to be "feminists" still keep this in check. If you want equal rights for men and women, that includes the downsides too

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#18

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Bullying. It's absurd how society will frame it as a "stage of your life" rather than supporting individuals more so they know how to deal with it. Especially academically, still overlooked majorly.

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Kira Okah
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And massively overlooked or flat out ignored on social media. Ad in the workforce. It not just something kids do on the playground.

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#19

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Alcoholic moms. No, you don’t NEED to bring wine to your daughters soccer game. It’s not quirky. It’s awful. Wine mom stuff on social media only strengthens it and makes it more popular.

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Grumble O'Pug
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Instamom is the stuff if nightmares. Like the recent one where she jams on the brakes to teach her kid to buckle up. Full blown narcissism in action

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#20

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Using mental illness as an excuse. I suffer from several, and it's very hard on me.. But, i get professional help and deal with it head on. Reading constant posts everyday about people having this disorder and that disorder and that's why it's ok to act a certain way is demotivating. Awareness is important, but dozens of posts everyday about having borderline personality disorder or bipolar disorder and why it's acceptable for you to be an a-hole is not awareness... If you suffer from these so badly, please get help

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Sigrid Johanesdóttir
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Getting the help you need is not always easy, asking for help when you're with an anxiety disorder and depression that makes you feel guilty for looking for help, plus you feel suicidal and the physical symptoms won't let you move from bed, eat or even function and many people can't control their triggers due to abuse and PTSD so only because you met that specific person or people you CANNOT generalize at all. Countries and governments should take this more seriously. Where I am from, Iceland and in whole Scandinavia and Finland mental sickness is a government issue and all works have mental sick days leave, insurances with therapist and such because we deal with months of darkness and lack of vitamins, plus add a disfunctional family, domestic violence and chronic pain or any other sickness. So no. I highly disagree with this one. The world SHOULD normalize mental health as a major priority because it affects physical health and everyone should be helped, including those who behave like asholes should recieve support and have a treatment because I'm sure there's some sort of trauma causing that disorder. As a psychologist and suicidal survivor dealing with endometriosis that affects your hormones and mental health this is my profesional opinion.

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Jj321
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is.tough, and I mostly agree and see where you are coming from. But getting mental help isn't always easy. A lot of doctors don't take some insurances, if any. Some people have bad reactions to a lot of psych meds. I am by no means saying, use your illness to be an asshole, but sometimes people can't get the help they need.

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TheBlackPanda (JustABlackBear)
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I agree. Don't use your disorder as an excuse for being an asshole. Some disorders are out of people's control though. Like autism, tourettes and other disorders like that. People with these disorders can seem very annoying to you if you don't understand what's happening to them. Also, not everyone has access to help like you do. A lot of people can't afford professional help like you can. So consider that as well before you judge

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Mazer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have to say, I respect ANYONE willing to look at themselves and to work on things that are not functioning well. Be it of organic reasons or learned behavior, you have my respect. Mental health issues are still a huge stigma and embracing a path to bring a better you takes an amazing amount of courage and conviction.

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Lin B
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I’m glad you are able to get professional help. Many can’t because they can’t afford it. Too many people are stuck in an income bracket that doesn’t pay for co-pays and free clinics are a joke.

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Mahagony74 Red
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It was so hard getting my treatment set up...mentally and physically I was drained while my personal and business relationships were in jeopardy it wasnt a gudd time for me and as I continue to gain control of my life and momentum to go forward I was able to step outside myself get the help I needed

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Luka Verheijen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There is never a true excuse for being an asshole. Sure, you can explain, but you still have to work to deal with it

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K R
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is both "get over yourself" and "good for you." This one falls in line with the aforementioned honest/rude/etc. This 'shut up and get help' is easier said than done. Healthcare disparities...ever heard of 'em?

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Rose Yellow Mint
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2 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

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Draperdorf
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Undiagnosed ADHD and/or ASD in adults, is often misdiagnosed as BPD or Bi-Polar This happens to people are neurodiverse but have no idea they are and have lived their whole lives believing they are neurotypical (and failing it at if miserably). Over time this takes its toll and mental health issues start to arise as a result. Overtime this can lead to a breakdown when the misdiagnosis happens (due to the symptoms of both bring fairly similar when it's reached crisis point). So, I'd hazard a guess that many badly behaved people who "can't help it" because of their BPD/BP, are actually adults with u diagnosed ADHD and/or ASD, who have reached crisis point and now remain there due to their misdiagnosis, henbebehaviours

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Draperdorf
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ran out of word count... was going to say that remaining in crisis whilst still believing yourself to be neurotypical in many ways does mean you can't help your behaviours because you're actually experiencing trauma. You don't know why you are struggling and you can't improve because you are facing the wrong battle. If the misdiagnosis is corrected to ADHD/ASD (where appropriate. BPD/Bi Polar are still actual disorders for many) then the "can't help it" bad behaviours die out due to a person learning about what normal is for them and ways to live life as a neurodiverse person in a neuro typical world. A lot of words (because I'm ADHD lol). I'm speaking from my own personal experience and similar stories from many others

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LadyDez
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I agree but getting help is hard. I lost my professional career to being unable to function anymore and have spent five YEARS trying to get help. I don't even leave my house. The only meds that ever helped me and I've tried them all are unavailable due to laws and doctors who just refuse to prescribe them. I'm not an asshole to anyone tho. I just suffer.

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Mike Crow
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Actually some mental illness would explain someone being an a-hole, however most that have that certain mental illness would not actually use it as an excuse.

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Dawson James
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's not "trendy" to have mental disorder. Its serious and destructive. I have depression and people who do this and make it look fake make me doubt my self and think that Im not as good others.

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RandomBeing
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have ADHD and pretty young I learned that it is not to be used as an excuse. It is a reason but not an excuse (there is a difference and its your attitude. Obviously its different for each situation as to what counts as using it as an excuse/reason and idk how ot explain it). People who use their mental illness/disorder as an excuse put a bad rep on the rest of us which makes it harder for people to take us seriously when our mental illness/disorder is an actual reason and they think we're using it as an excuse.

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Tobias Rieper
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

this is something that really don't like i get if you do have a mental health issue or personality disorder u cant help it but people throwing it around as a an excuse to not do something or to be an asshole about something is what causes people with genuine issues to not speak up

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Leo Domitrix
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

THIS times a thousand. I know folks who'll say, "Oh, sorry, that's my bipolar talking," and I (with my MD) think, "No, that's you being a twit, and you're not bipolar, you don't meet the diagnostic criteria by a country mile."

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Dodo
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Using it as an excuse to be an a-hole? I agree, don't do it. But don't lump all excuses in with that. I'm glad you get professional help; I've tried many, many times and it hasn't helped. Yes, I know I'm a loser, I know I should just 'man up' and not be a burden, I know it sucks having to give me extra time/help. But I can't just immediately change that, I'm doing the best I can, and you telling me it's an excuse doesn't change anything except that it makes me feel even worse about myself.

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Ash Bash
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This x1000. This gives me the same feels as those "anything is possible if you try hard enough" posts. You're not a loser btw. Keep doing what's right for you at that time and don't compare yourself to anyone else please.

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juztme
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes, I see it with parents that have kids with ADHD, autism and such. Lots of them blame everything there kid does wrong on there disorder. My son has autism he knows it is wrong to hurt other people or animals. Having a mental disorder doesnt mean you're allowed to be a ass. I seen this soo much at my sons school. Parents that just said. "He cant help it, he has ADHD" Well bullshit lady. You just dont wanna deal with it...

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Brian Bennett
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Just because you can't see it doesn't mean it ain't there! Wise up people pain is pain!

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Melia Janssen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have epilepsy and I take regular medications to manage it. My neurological and mental health aren't my fault but it is my responsibility to take care of myself as best as I can and I cannot depend on the empathy of others because it's not their health to manage.

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Jodie Kavanagh
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I get the point, but not everyone has access to and money for therapy and medication.

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Nia Loves Art
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It is not an excuse, but it can be a mitigating factor. The world is hard and overwhelming for me. That’s why I seem lazy, and why sometimes things get too much and I just break down.

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Ash Bash
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Same 100% . But people just see it as Mr giving up or not trying at all when in reality I have to try ten times harder to achieve the same things as neurotypicals. Over time, that takes a toll.

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Two thousand seven
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Especially defending a person being horrible because they have a mental illness. Mental illness is not an excuse to be asshole.

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Lara Mastrangelo McDonell
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

People use "physical" illness as an excuse all the time. What's the difference?

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Molly Reece
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I agree with this so much. I have a colleague who uses her disorder as a smokescreen for her shitty personality and an excuse to treat others abominably. She is never called out on this, because of said disorder. It's outrageous.

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KimB
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

*** standing ovation *** I believe I have mild ADHD and possibly functional OCD...I use it to my advantage I can go from zero to sixty in a split second (think normal office visit turned into cardiac arrest) and I'm constantly correcting mistakes because I check and double check my work constantly...I believe it makes me a better caregiver:D

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Blacksheep Backsheep
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This person doesn't seem to know what they're talking about. Recovering from an eating disorder (its technically a mental disorder) does mean you may not be able to work for a while

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Csaba Horvath
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There are many forms of mental illnesses the ine cannot control. So many times it can be an excuse, but not so often as nowadays.

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Bent. O. Jensen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Confusing explanations with excuses. Telling "why" is an explanation, not an excuse.

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Jaded McQueen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

who the H are you to say how an individual deals with their SPECIFIC mental illness...SMH.

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Leigh C.
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't agree with this. It's quite assumptive that those with a mental condition of any sorts should have all the answers be able to just deal with it, or have the help at hand right away. It can take a long time to receive help and not everyone has the financial means to access the right kind of therapy for themselves. When someone is trying to relate/explain what they feel is going on with them they're just letting you know so you're aware. That's all. It's not them "making excuses". The same mental condition can be different person to person. Just because you're dealing with it fine, doesn't mean the next person is. What's more annoying are the people saying they have mental disorders to be quirky or trying to instill fear, which could be what you're referring to. But those with real disorders are usually aware and ashamed of their bad behaviour.

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Paul Mitchell
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

People have to take responsibility for their actions. There is no other way to be. I have seen people be assholes when they think they can get away with it, but be all sweetness and light if they need to be.

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Jessica Aubé
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Assholes will always have an excuse to be an asshole wether it’s mental illness or not But comparing your mental illness to someone else’s is ableist .. just because you have your mental illness under control doesn’t mean everyone can and also doesn’t mean they aren’t also taking meds seeing their doctor seeing a counselor trying Cbt etc etc There’s a huge difference between just being an asshole and being someone who IS unable to conform to whatever society says they should conform to

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OhForSmegSake
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was was raised by someone with a mental illness (possibly more than one) who made us live around "their" illness and would get violent if we broke their ever changing rules. They also let their mentally ill son run the house with intimidation and violence. It's no surprise that he cannot live in society now. I myself have multiple diagnosis as well as a neurodivergence. Because I live with a flawed mental health system I have had to be my own doctor and advocate. I've researched my conditions, read books and studies, joined free group therapies, talked to others with my conditions, put in as many coping and healing strategies as I possibly can. Am I the healthiest and sanest person out there? No. Am I likely to cause other's fear, harm, or even use my illnesses as an excuse. No, because that's bullshit.

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Ray Martin
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The thing that I find insufferable is the sheer number of people who adopt the idea of a mental or physical illness because they think it makes them somehow edgy or fascinating, or as a reason to behave like they're "special". "It's too long to read because of my ADHD"; "I can't deal with this because of my PTSD"; "That picture is playing havoc with my OCD"; "clowns are terrifying"; "I'm deathly allergic to gluten/nuts/dairy/whatever you're currently enjoying" There are people who genuinely suffer from those things, and they usually do it in silence, not announce it at every opportunity, so can the crap and go away.

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Isaac Harvey
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can look calm but still experience flashbacks to hallucinating for 48 hours after my first brain surgeries in August 2013 for childhood brain cancer.

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karin s.
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

i really hate such comments - if you are in the position to do things then fine for you - but then your mental illness does not affect you like others are affected by theirs. mental illness affects behavior in certain ways - that is how you know that you got a mental illness.

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Liberato
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I used to know someone who would use "I suffer from Asperger's" everytime she would do something wrong as an excuse 😂

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Suz66
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sometimes people aren't ready to deal with trauma yet. Therapy can be hard to afford and finding a good one is a challenge. Sometimes though, people give up easily and live in misery. Never give up.

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ShadowLand 🇨🇦
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I totally agree. I have my demons but I'm not an asshat because of them. Get help and learn coping skills so you can stop using people as your punching bag.

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Tim Jansen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Fork you! This is the same as telling someone with legs missing to crawl faster! I'm *JUST* as annoying and inconvenient to you "normal" people are to me. I got help, i have help but i can't change my neurology or DNA. Fork you!

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Lynn Morello
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Help is not that easy to come by. Having to get through, jumping through every ones different hoops to convince them that this IS AN ISSUE for you, only for them to tell you to, Go see you GP, I wand Blood AND Urine tests, Bring me the results and "WE" will discuss IF WE feel you need to see someone.. Then there are the Medico's, " Good morning Mrs ### What can I GIVE you today? OR What tablets do YOU want ME to write up for you.. Very condescending, Unwarranted and demeaning,

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Celtic Pirate Queen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Agree. Being an assh*le is just you being an assh*le, whether you have a mental illness or not.

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Riley Quinn
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Agree. I've got a few myself and, due to numerous misdiagnoses, I developed additional problems because of inappropriate medications. I've used my mental disorders as an excuse in so far as warning others I'm having a bad day, don't expect much, bla, bla. But as an a-hole excuse? Never.

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JJM
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why do they need to broadcast disorders? They say a problem aired is a problem shared. I would never want to share my problems with anyone other than a close friend.

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Baali Venomax
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Fair enough but while you're seeking help, it doesn't mean you should be expected to control your reactions 24/7 and be punished for other people's inability to leave you alone and stop pressing your buttons when you have tried to leave a situation thats about to turn bad. If you follow me and keep provoking me, eventually you will get smacked.

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Andrea Hartzler
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ther 's a point in life when you have to make your own decisions and accept responsibility for the consequences. Can't blame Mom and Dad forever

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Magpie
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Getting the right help that actually helps is not always easy nor affordable. Depending on which state/country you live in.

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Jaded McQueen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Who are you to say how a specific individual deals with their specific mental illness....SMH

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Chloe *Leah* Pheonix
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Same goes with people who blame their actions on their zodiac "oops sorry I'm an asparagus"

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Katherine Boag
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not sure where this is being enabled. Almost everywhere in the mainstream media and social media it says that if you did something bad (violent or bigoted) you must be mentally ill. Never mind that people with mental illnesses are more likely to be victim of violence than perpetrators. The only other stuff i occasionally see are awareness raising posts asking people to have some empathy (NOT excusing any bad behaviour) for people with specific conditions.

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Anggi Santika
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This!! Everyone has problem, doesn't mean it gives us the right to be entitled b***h. My son is developmentally delayed, ASD, SPD, ADHD but those don't give him the right to do whatever he pleases. True that it's hard to find help but it's there

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Crispy Toast
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have a friend who has all the tools, but refuses to use them. I just can't with her anymore. Thought she was going to get me kicked out of a concert.

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SocksNeverMatch
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh, thanks. My child now adult, all of her therapists enabled her. Never gave tools to handle things and not use her, very real mental health issues, as a crutch /defense.

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Susan Mercurio
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had a neighbor who was a jerk and abusing her husband, who excused her behavior with "she has a mental illness." Sadly for him, I and my 15-year-old son both have mental illnesses and I told him that I wouldn't let my child act like that. "It's no excuse."

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Blacksheep Backsheep
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Eating disorder can definetly have an excuse for a lot of things actually.

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Ember Flame
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can agree with this TO A POINT. ALTHOUGH... There really are people with severe mental illness that truly cannot control themselves. I suffer from all of the above plus some I also have Dissociative amnesia, Dissociative Identiy disorder, General anxiety disorder, and PTSD. I do have outburat that I have absolutely no control over because like a wounded animal I am in pain, and lashing out. I live in constant guilt that I am hurting the people I love. To the point that it only adds to my pain. Then ontop of that,, just seeing you in deep pain, hurts the people that truly care about you because there is NOTHING they can do to help you...Do you think I do not TRY to stop? I have been in therapy since 2010, it doesn't help. I have watched the leading edge of New therapys, and tried them, most of the time it either helps for a moment, or doesn't at all. I have been on more combinations of medications than I can count, when I see a new doctor it is easier to figure out the drugs I haven't been on. The problem is the American mental health system is broken, jaded, and stagnantin old ideas and beliefs that most people can'teven get the help that they need. After years of trying to navigate this flawed system I only last month finally found the answer to my long search. Something so radical, and new that most people won't accept it. Psychedelic therapy. Now that I am finally better I want to go back and help the ones that cannot help themselves, with peer support. There ARE people out there that truly cannot control the pain they cause others. I also believe there ARE people that use it as a crutch, you ARE correct on that point. So while I agree with this statement, just like everything there are exceptions to this rule. So please don't lump EVERYONE into on category.

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Eric Johansen
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah it does muck things up doesn't it? And yes the world is your enabler because it's a very strong influencer.

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Susie Elle
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Especially people on TikTok saying they've got anxiety while in reality they're just awkward teens who get nervous in front of crowds.

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Norah Reilly
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

True, but...what if you have no support system, no/few resources, etc.? I think that it's always easy to pass judgement on someone without knowing if said person has access to the kind of help/support that they need.

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M Calad
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am in the spectrum + have anxiety disorder. I don't like to put labels on me; I am just a human being with extra challenges because of the way I am vs the way society is set up. I don't want the world to change for me; everyday I am learning to cope as much as I can. My condition is not an excuse. However, I have faced a lot of rejection, misunderstanding, ridiculing, pressure, etc. Perhaps if the world was more considerate, open, understanding and compassionate, it wouldn't be so hard for us to adapt. So, it goes both ways then.

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LaToya Mack
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Where has to compassion gone? It’s not an excuse it’s a reality. You people! The character of this nation is flawed and damn net beyond redemption. What has happened?! In a pLandemic on less..

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csaclint
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This. 100% you will never ever ever improve yourself if you constantly find excuses. does it suck? absolutely, but that doesn't change the fact that each of us is responsible for our own results

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Isaac Harvey
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm in college, and a friend once mentioned how she had a certain disorder I can't remember off the top of my head. I then asked her if it was a formal diagnosis, or if she was just experiencing symptoms. (She had a formal diagnosis.) I should not have to ask questions like this, yet there I was. Heck, even I have two conditions- childhood brain cancer and epilepsy- but I only ask to opt out of doing something when appropriate; e.g. I’m extremely tired, or I can feel my eyes starting to roll back as I lose my balance- which has happened once, when I had to spin around three times while blindfolded.

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Rissy cake
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I suffer this but getting help is hard and during pandemic . Insurance and cost. This pandemic also makes it worse.

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CatWoman312
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don’t fully disagree, but I also have to say it depends on the situation.

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Flip
Community Member
2 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

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Jeremy Arnott
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Couldn't agree more with this one. I'm bipolar and I'm sick to death with weak people changing the perception of it. I am not like them

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Wise beauty the panda
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Also people fake having mental illness to get attention or to make people think they are special

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Tee Witt
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have no time for people whinging, I have problems but do not spend my time telling anyone, my business.

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Psycho Cat
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you look at those posts, it seems that almost the entire population of Earth has some sort of disorder. And, in many cases, people who really do suffer don't feel better because they're not the only ones feeling like that, but quite the opposite - they feel as if their illnes is not being seen as serious but trendy.

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Julie C Rose
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As someone who’s also diagnosed, the people who “feel as if their illness is not being seen as serious but trendy” are typically too young to remember that our disorders were taken even LESS seriously before people online started talking about them a lot, and/or lazy cowards who punch down because it’s easier than addressing the actual causes of our problems. I develop more and more disgust for those people every time they open their mouths.

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#21

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Married couples disliking one another. Normalizing abusive and toxic elements in marriage is lame, bro.

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Burs
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Like the jokes about men being “chained” when they decide to marry. Then don’t f*****g marry. If I was the girlfriend In would be furious

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#22

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Working while on vacation. You go on vacation to relax and enjoy yourself, not to try to fill out spreadsheets and deal with work stuff in your hotel room.

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KJ
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm guessing this is more a US issue from what I have read, most of us just don't work when on leave.

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#23

Using the phrase "it's my right" as a get out of jail free card to engage in whatever reckless behaviour that takes your fancy.

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#24

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop The entire "game" involved in modern dating or even most social interactions. The playing hard to get, the "arriving fashionably late" like people can we please keep it simple?

Ya go on laugh at me.

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Scagsy
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've been married for just over a decade and would be absolutely terrified of being back in the dating game. I wouldn't know where to start.

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#25

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Unhealthy weight. I’m not talking about being fit and thin and making people feel bad about their bodies. Im not talking about having a few extra pounds and making people feel bad for that. I have a few extra pounds, I’m not super fit, but I’m relatively healthy. Everyone’s body is different. Healthy means a lot of different things.

I’m talking about normalizing morbidly obese people as beautiful and something to be celebrated. It’s dangerous especially if children see them as someone to look up to. Then they’ll think it’s ok for your body to carry around so much weight that your heart and lungs are working overtime to keep you alive. It will lead to devastating later years in life as you age and your body slows down. You’ll be at risk for cardiovascular issues, you’ll probably die before your time, and the last few years of your life will be bed ridden while you waste away.

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Otter
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

While I agree that there is such a thing as unhealthy weight, you still won't see me attacking the "body positivity movement". Because for people to change for the better, the first step has to be letting go of the self-hatred and shame that plagues the seriously overweight and drives them into a self-destructive spiral of self-harming and self-comforting behavior. If the body positivity movement helps anyone let go of the guilt and self-hatred that's poisoned their lives then more good than harm has been done, and it's not like body negativity ever did anyone any good. You can't shame people into being thinner or healthier, that's not how humans work.

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#26

having unsocial and aggressive dogs, and not leashing or otherwise controlling them

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#27

Degrees for office jobs that take almost no time to learn and usually have nothing to do with the degree anyways . So many people out there who can’t afford college but, are just as capable as anyone else.

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J. F.
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ridiculous demands from the same companies that cry over the lack of qualified employees

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#28

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Diamond and gemstones as gifts. They're shiny rocks with artificially inflated value. They're only expensive because people are willing to pay so much for them. If everyone stopped buying them, the price would fall faster than the Hindenburg. Or faster than the employment rate this year.

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#29

Cheating. Sooo many "love stories" on netflix, or just any sort of romance movie released these days have cheating involved in them so much. It's always branded as this romantic thing to do. Oooo like at this dark and brooding handsome guy with no personality. Time to f him and forget about my 2 year relationship, or some s*** like that. It's not romantic, it's just wrong, and it should not be normalised.

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Luka Verheijen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's all a little more complicated, some people seem to think cheating is about as bad as it can get. But that being said, romance movies are actually the most messed up when you think about it

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#30

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Unhealthily obese pets. You took a warrior and domesticated it! They aren't happy if they're fat! They just eat on instinct! Stop inadvertently hurting the beings that love us unconditionally!

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#31

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Bragging about getting less than 6 hours of sleep.

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#32

The grind. Not taking vacation. Working on vacation. Working through your lunch break. Working early and late all the time. Answering emails after hours.

We are completely dispensable to the companies we work for. Don’t lose your life grinding for a company who only thinks of you as a number.

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Vorknkx
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I work at a university, and vacations are sacrosanct here. We have an unwritten rule that you never call someone who is on vacation, no matter how dire the need may be.

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#33

Over-consumption. This goes out to social media influencers who flaunt their hauls and influence people to buy things that they don't need. It will just add on to the landfills. Please, no one's benefitting from hoarding.

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Trixypix
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's too much credit for the influencers. Overconsumption entails much more than that. Sadly enough.

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#34

Hatred of someone who lives differently than they do.

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J. F.
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As long as it doesn't hurt anybody else it's none of my business

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#35

Toxic positivity. There’s a huge difference between being optimistic and having raised colored glasses on. We’re all people, and we all experience negative and positive emotions. The only way you can properly get over your emotions is by allowing yourself to feel them. Glossing over your emotions with an aura of “Everything’s fine” isn’t going to solve anything, and it’s just gonna make you feel bad.

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Otter
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had a supervisor who was a true believer in toxic positivity. Her attitude was "If we all believe in this stupid idea, it WILL work!", when the sensibly positive attitude is to say "We CAN come up with a solution that will work!".

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#36

Failures in political leadership. I feel more and more we are becoming less critical of failed character in our leaders.

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NsG
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We criticise. It's just water off a duck's back. Its not criticism that's lacking, it's accountability and consequence.

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#37

Student loans.

Education is getting more expensive by the day and the added burden on a student in paying back a student loan helps nobody.

Furthermore people encourage student loans as though the students are obligated to take them if they pursue higher studies. Pure nonsense.

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#38

Hating police. I've worked places that police don't go. You all don't know how good you have it.

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Kesam
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't hate police in general, but I've had my arm and nearly my skull broken during the 2001 Genoa protests (unprovoked attack on peaceful protesters) and I was in the Diaz school raid (but luckily wasn't hurt as I was hiding in a closet). Sooo... there's good apples and bad apples... but the bad apples do a lot of damage as they are put in a position of power.

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#39

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Students overwhelmed by homework when it isn’t necessary. I’m excluding situations like when the workloads from classes are reasonable and happen to pile on one day or students who aren’t organized, etc. This whole thing is a grey area, but sleep, burnout, mental health exists.

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WilvanderHeijden
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A little coordination between teachers could solve this problem. I can remember the times where we had to do an assignment for English and an hour later our French teacher came up with a similar time consuming assignment. When we explained that that meant we had to choose which one we could do, he postponed the assignment for 2 weeks. But other teachers just said "Deal with it." It's education, teacher, we're not operating a multibillion dollar business with deadlines and targets here.

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#40

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Not caring about education. So many people obviously didn't pay attention in elementary school and don't care about it.

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Luka Verheijen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Over here, the government doesn't see education as a "top priority" while I think it's one of THE most important things

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