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When kids grow up, become adults, and have their own kids, they’re quite literally still the kids. Then, these big and serious children in disguise are secretly struggling in this big world full of multitasking. Deciding what’s best for their kids on a daily basis can be truly nerve-wracking, but sometimes, a little spoken word can work wonders, according to people online.

You see, when one Reddit user posed the question “What's something that every parent should tell their child?” on r/AskReddit, it seemed like a straightforward one. But as soon as the answers started flooding in, it became obvious we’re dealing with some real wisdom gems and one of those increasingly rare examples of the internet giving something truly valuable.

From telling your kids you can indeed be wrong sometimes, since it’s only human, to apologizing to them if you’re wrong, these are little things your child self would thank you for.

#1

30 People Share Their Opinion On What Every Parent Should Tell Their Children A good parent shouldn't be afraid to apologize to their kid when they're wrong.

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Serial pacifist
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A good person should apologize when they are wrong, regardless of who the wronged person is. Admitting imperfection is the first step to perfecting yourself.

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#2

The proper terminology for their genitals. Other adults aren't always going to know what your kid means when they say "someone played with my monkey or my tutu," and predators aren't going to call them by the proper names either, so it's another deterent for abuse to occur. Vagina, Penis, Vulva, Testicles- these are not dirty words people.

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BlackestDawn
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I fully agree, and it shouldn't be limited to just genitalia. I have never understood why the proper term for so many body parts and bodily functions are considered "dirty" or "inappropriate" to say.

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#3

Whenever another kid is being mean to them, physically or verbally, don't tell your child that the other kid was being mean to them because they like your child. Your child might grow up mistaking abuse for affection.

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Foxxy (The Original)
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have never understood why it was a thing people taught their kids in the first place.

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Bored Panda reached out and spoke about parenting with the author of the thread, Reddit user SaladSlayer00, as well as with Samantha Scroggin, founder of the "Walking Outside in Slippers" blog. Read on for our insightful interviews with both of them. Hopefully, what they said will help present and future parents.

SaladSlayer00 revealed to Bored Panda that they created the thread because they were imagining how they could potentially behave as a parent now that their relationship is getting serious. "Also, I recently lost my father and it was somewhat comforting to see how almost everything meaningful users suggested had already been said to me by my family. What started as a, 'Hey, look at all the karma I'm getting!' turned into a moving and wholesome thread that I'm very proud of," they said.

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#4

30 People Share Their Opinion On What Every Parent Should Tell Their Children If you make a mistake and need help, come to me. Kids tend to make bad situations worse by trying not to get caught. I know way too many people who got in drunk driving accidents because they were too afraid to call their parents for help and drove home or got in the car with a drunk driver.

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nanashi
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

if I were to have children, I want that the first thing they thought when in trouble is to call/ask me for help. not hiding it from me. not like my parents who I never tell a thing because blaming me would be the first thing they would do.

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#5

30 People Share Their Opinion On What Every Parent Should Tell Their Children Your low academic performance does not mean you'll be a failure in life.

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Foxxy (The Original)
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

100% this, not everyone is smart academically, some are smart in different ways like one of my brothers is extremely smart when it comes to maintenance and fixing things yet my other brother knows stuff all about that stuff but he is book smart, we to uni etc. One is not smarter than the other, they are just different in smarts.

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#6

No means no.

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troufaki13
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No means no goes both ways. We have to respect the no we're given as it is expected from others to respect ours.

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According to the redditor, having a strong bond with your children is vital. "I think that many parents confuse this with a pale imitation of friendship that by definition just can't work. There needs to be absolute trust and acceptance no matter what, but still, the right amount of objectivity and distance to evaluate situations, and make kids understand that after all, their parents have the duty to correct their actions and worry about them."

They continued: "It's not easy, but I think parents might help their children open up to them by showing a positive, reassuring attitude and enthusiasm for their passions."

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#7

''I love you regardless of your gender and sexuality'' unfortunately that wasn't what my mom said.

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#8

Its alright to make a mistake, as long as you can admit it and grow from it.

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Vorknkx
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is very good advice, especially since some parents are constantly afraid and trying to shield their child from making any mistakes whatsoever (this usually involves a lot of suffocating restrictions upon the child).

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#9

30 People Share Their Opinion On What Every Parent Should Tell Their Children I’m proud of you.

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Mia Hamsa
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have gone with "You should be very proud of yourself. I certainly am of you" to instigate self worth and validation. It teaches children that they should look to themselves for validation, not an authority figure.

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Because some children, especially teens, can find it difficult to accept advice from parents (even if that advice is brilliant), we wanted to find out the ways around this obstacle. SaladSlayer00 said that advice shouldn't be given to kids without explaining the reasons behind it.

"I think that the best way to make children understand that you see them as intelligent human beings is taking the time to help them see the whole picture without making a 'no' look like a meaningless refusal, but a well-thought-out choice that is only made with their interest in mind.

#10

30 People Share Their Opinion On What Every Parent Should Tell Their Children Be kind. You never know what someone might be going through and I love you.

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#11

How their bodies work — no, how they really work. Periods, sex, poop, everything.

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#12

If anyone ever tells them, “This will be our little secret,” especially if it involves physical contact, my child needs to get as far away from that person ASAP, find a trusted adult, and contact me. My child will know they will not be in trouble for telling and I will always believe them.

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JacPot
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes, please! Some people are beasts and the above should be common information! Also, children should be taught that predators will most likely use the child's fear against them and will threaten to kill them or their loved ones if they say anything. Children must be taught that no matter what, they should always tell someone they trust! Scream, fight and get away by any means necessary!

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Meanwhile, "Walking Outside in Slippers" founder Samantha said that repetition can help kids learn. "I hope if we just keep repeating ourselves on the issues that matter most to us, and personally demonstrate those qualities we want our kids to have, they'll get the message eventually," she said. Samantha added that one of the biggest challenges is that kids need lots of validation and they're always vying for their parents' attention.

But what are the most important things about life that Samantha wants her own children to know? "There's so much to tell my children about life. And there is so much I'm still learning myself. I feel like as I grow older, I realize just how little all of us know about everything. We're all trying to figure it out as we go and find some fulfillment and happiness in the process. I think the most important lesson I've learned and would want to pass along to my children is that no one is better than anyone else. Racism, sexism, religious discrimination, and other forms of discrimination are never OK. We must stay vigilant of how we treat each other, and our attitudes and beliefs," she shared.

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#13

Knock the door before you enter.

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#14

Sometimes, friends you trust will manipulate you. Parents should teach their children what manipulation is and how to avoid it... Cause it ain't so black and white

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Foxxy (The Original)
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would absolutely love it if my daughter had friends that weren’t toxic but sadly they are and one in particular is very manipulative. My daughter would rather have those “friends” than having no friends coz sadly that is pretty much the only choices she has.

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#15

You don't have to respect anyone that disrespects you, even if they're your "elder"

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#16

30 People Share Their Opinion On What Every Parent Should Tell Their Children Your mental illness is not a weakness.

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von Funnyname
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Jesus, if my parents would have just acknowledged that it was possible to have a mental illness that didn't mean you were foaming at the mouth in a straightjacket, my world would be much brighter as an adult. They loved me through all of it, but I should have been pushed for help also, had they known how.

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#17

It’s important to be kind, but you don’t need to be everyone’s best friend. Some ppl are just not going to like you, and that’s okay - it goes both ways

Also being a kid/teenager is f**king hard work. It gets so much better after high school, I promise

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Aski Markup
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ya know, sometimes it doesn't get better after high-school. I tell everyone that I'm so glad I went to university and that it was the best time of my life. Because everybody says that. In fact I hated it. More than high school. But... It did get better after that, thank God.

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#18

Admitting they can be wrong sometimes. Parents are humans and make mistakes. Kids need to see that.

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#19

What to do in an emergency. If the fire alarm goes off they should know that they need to get out of the house. Don't look for mum and dad. Don't hide under the bed. Get out.

They also need to know how to call emergency services. If a parent collapses, the child may be the only person around to make the call.

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Katy McMouse
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Knowing how rough my kids and their friends can be when playing, I've told them countless times that if someone has fallen or been impaled in any way, with any object, DON'T PULL IT OUT! Call for help and let the professionals do that. Resist the urge!

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Out of chocolate
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We had to have a big talk about what constitutes an emergency after my three year old called 911 because he couldn’t find the crayons and I told him he had to wait until I was done changing his brothers diaper. Thankfully the operator asked him if he was with an adult so he ran to give me the phone... smh

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Artoonist Corine
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Let them hear what the fire alarm sounds like as well. That will stop some of the panic. They will know what the sound is and practice what to do. Our local fire department has practice 911 calls for kids during their open houses. It's great!

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Anne Reid
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Add to this: your kids should be taught their full names and yours! As a park ranger, I’d find lost kids who didn’t know that mom & dad have first names!

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M O'Connell
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I remember being told as a very young child how to shut off the gas valve at the meter on the outside of the house, in case there were any kind of emergency.

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Caroline Driver
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And don't look for the cat, she's probably long long gone! I did once practise with my daughter when she was small (about 5 or 6), what to do if Mummy was lying on the floor not waking up, i.e. phone 999. She never needed to, so I don't know if it would have worked, but it was worth a try

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Susan Egan
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We had a plan, leave and meet at the neighbors house. They knew how to call 911. I climbed up an extension ladder (I hate heights) to get our cat that had been missing 3 days. As I climbed we went over how to dial 911, who was the closest neighbor to where we were. If they weren't home etc. Both cat and I survived unscathed.

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Fred Burrows
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Run scenarios that will take the hesitation out of a real life event .

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#20

Always have an open mind before coming to an opinion. Question and research the facts before blindly following someone else’s lead.

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Chuck
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I always do that before I post on Social Media. Some people online actually get mad at me for doing that.

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#21

30 People Share Their Opinion On What Every Parent Should Tell Their Children That it's okay to ask for help and no one will think less of them.

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#22

“You don’t have to earn my love. Nothing you do will ever make me love you any less. I will ALWAYS love you, no matter what.” I say these three lines to my kids so often!

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M O'Connell
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

@Martha Meyer That says more about you than it says about them. Just because someone has made poor choices and has a criminal record does not mean that they aren't your child, that they aren't deserving of parental love and support. A parents job is never over, regardless of how old (or how messed-up) their children have become. Rejecting them outright will not help them to grow beyond their past and become a productive member of society (even if they are in prison for life).

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#23

Express that it's ok to feel uncomfortable and not want to do something. I saw a post where a mother taught her daughter to say hello but if she didn't want a hug or a kiss on the cheek she was never forced to do so. If the kid felt comfortable she would do it. Expressing that this is ok seems pretty important IMO

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Lousha
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hated the mandatory kisses with the extended family when I was little. My grandfather was a typical farmer, very rough around the edges, always had a stubble that just pricked and hurt as you'd kiss him on the cheek, and he smelled like stale wine. I liked to be around him because he was funny and friendly with us little ones but hated to kiss him. One of my aunts was very unkempt, her facial hairs were also really prickly :) One of my cousins (from a previous marriage of my aunt's) was much older than all other cousins, almost a grown up when we others were just kindergarteners and it felt really odd to kiss him simply because he was not "blood", wasn't really a kid but also wasn't a "real adult". He was great company and a genuinely nice young man but I always shirked away from kisses if I could. So yeah, please stop forcing kiddos to kiss people just because you feel like it's polite or customary or whatever.

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#24

Having money doesn't make you better than anybody else.

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Sanne H.
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

True. And when you do have it: It’s not the money that makes you better, it’s how you spend it.

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#25

Coping skills to process their emotions

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Nancy Jeckells
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is such a good one. Sadly, they need the skills themselves to be able to teach them.

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#26

30 People Share Their Opinion On What Every Parent Should Tell Their Children Look out for the smaller kids on the playground, kindness is free so make sure to use it.

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Lousha
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In turn it's very useful to teach that just because someone is nice or helpful to you it doesn't automatically mean they want to be your BFF. I had lots of bad experiences where people would misinterpret a simple smile, a helping hand and just "latch on" and get very clingy, leading to very awkward situations.

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#27

“The world is a f**ked up place. People are going to hate you for the sake of hating you, and spit on you for what you believe. What I want you to know is I’ll always support you. And I’ll never be disappointed in what you do with your life as long as you love it” ~ My dad

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Sanne H.
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, that’s a bit negative. Maybe I grew up in the right place, but to my opinion most people are nice, reliable and willing to help. It’s only those 10% you need to avoid or avoid to become.

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#28

That it's OK to walk away from a fight. It doesn't make you less of a man, and walking away should always be the first resort.

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Katy McMouse
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My kids know that but I did tell them that if someone is being physically hurt and there are no adults around to help, it is ok to defend that person to the best of their abilities.

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#29

You didn’t ask to be born so it’s my responsibility to take care of you, pay for your expenses and make food and you don’t have to thank me for it because it’s normal (Actual thing my parent told me as a child)

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Jess-a-men
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I never got the concept that children "owe" their parents something for being fed and sheltered and cared for. You know what it's called when you don't feed and shelter and care for your child? It's called child neglect. Child neglect is a crime. You don't get rewards for not committing crimes. Your reward is not going to prison. Does my neighbor owe me something for not setting his house on fire? Does my boss owe me something for not stealing his car? No? Then why would my children owe me something for not abusing them?

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#30

That it's OK to be straight, gay, bi, pan, cisgender, transgender, or gender-fluid. There is no wrong sexual or gender identity. Just be yourself.

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Wolfstar
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

@Dave In MD, shut the hell up. Being lesbian, gay, bi, trans, queer, and more is not a mental problem. Being LGBTQIA+ is perfectly fine. History will look back on this era and wonder what the actual f*ck we were doing. Shaming people because of their sexuality? That's stupid and horrible. And we come down on people who use slurs and shame us because it's wrong. Sure, some people might think that labeling people is bad, but it makes some people feel comfortable with who they are because they have a word to describe them. Now, why don't you go sit down and figure out your sh*t?

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