To have a loving and caring family is a great blessing. However, even the most amazing home can have flaws that might be hurting.

Having blood ties doesn't mean that one is the same or similar to another. In some cases, a friend might be a closer person than the rest of the family. It all comes to the values and the way one thinks. With that in mind, I asked our pandas about a time when they felt uncomfortable because of something their family member said. Sadly or not, a lot of people had something to share. Scroll down to read the answers!

#1

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community I wouldn't necessarily call it "uncomfortable" but here goes: It was at my father's 85th birthday party and his likewise elderly sister/my aunt -who I had not seen in many years- tells me, "I'm surprised you're not in jail". I didn't skip a beat. "I'm surprised you're not dead". She avoided me the rest of the day...

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#2

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community It was more of a smaller gathering (bc of covid).
One of my family members told me I would never make it to heaven if I kept being gay. Me, being the idiot I am, stood up and yelled, "Praise Satan, then" and stormed off.
Everyone went SILENT

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#3

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community I hadn't seen my brother for at least 15+ years due to his travel and spending time in Europe. He had returned to the states and lived a couple hours away but still no real contact. Then, mom got sick. So, I drove up to get him and then up to my mom's. Now, I had gone from being 15 to 30+ since I last saw him and I had pursued a career in which I needed to be in good shape, so I worked out a lot. Once mom got home from the hospital, we all got together and it was then that he announced to everyone that he thought I looked like Arnold Schwartzenegger in drag. My mom popped up and commented, 'yeah, and she rides a motorcycle, too'. He just glared at me and that was when I told him that I also rolled my own tampons and kickstarted my vibrator. I thought mom was going to pop her stitches and my dad, a very quiet man, choked on his tea. My brother never said another word about me.

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#4

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community I was told I needed to get tips on doing my makeup. I was at my husband's funeral.

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#5

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community Years ago I was starting to get gray hair. My youngest brother was going prematurely bald. At one family gathering he made some comment about my gray hair. I replied "Better gray than gone!" He looked stunned and everyone else laughed. He never commented again about my hair.

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Marco Conti
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You can always die your hair. You'll need a sharpie to remediate a bald spot.

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#6

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community My mom wanted me to take a succulent cutting from the garden of the airbnb where I was staying. I said no. She kept at at it. I said I'd ask the host. My mom said "what? why?? no!!!" and "I didn't raise you to ask permission!" I was slightly shocked and then thought for a second... it's true. She didn't, but somehow I know the difference between right and wrong anyway. Luckily, I don't do what my mom tells me to do.

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#7

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community Thanksgiving. I was ten. First Thanksgiving with my step family. Walked into the kitchen to hear my dad say that my stepsister was the perfect child but I was a total disappointment. I started crying. He slapped me and said “what did you expect me to do, lie?” Everyone went off and started dinner as if nothing had happened. I was left standing by myself. I hate Thanksgiving. And my father.

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Caro Caro
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You are not a disappointment, your dad is. You OK now?

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Bama Belle
Community Member
2 years ago

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Rai Grant
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good grief, thought my mother was bad... biggest hugs to you, your "father" is an a hole.

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Viviane
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hate your father, too. Of course you keep your effing opinions about a 10-year-old to yourself. If you don't, you apologize.

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Viviane
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

One of the most despicable people I've ever met was "the perfect child". Very successful in her career, would sell her own grandmother if it was legal.

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Guðrún Sveinsdóttir
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He hasn't earned the right for you to call him a father and it brakes my heart that no one said a word. I would be livid and wouldn't take such crap from a horrible human being who attacks a child like that. F-ck him!

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Karen Grace
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He's not a father. He's a sperm donor. He needs to be told that to his face.

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ravenswood1000
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Absolutely you are not a disappointment!!!! I doubt that you need it, but if you do, the next time you see your father you have my permission to throw him out a window

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MellonCollie
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh my god, that is despicable!! I truly hope you have other people around you that DO appreciate and love you.

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Tamra Stiffler
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't know what's more painful, your dad's actions, or everyone else's lack of action. The good news is this: once you're an adult, you can choose your own family.

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Amina Hays
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a disgusting man. I'm sorry that happened to you, I hope you've cut all ties with him. He doesn't deserve to have you as his child.

arianahale avatar
AspieGirl88
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If only you’d had the same mother as me. I guarantee, the sperm-donor you speak of wouldn’t even get the chance to speak after laying hands on you; because HER hands would be around his throat (she once pinned my sisters BF to our kitchen fridge by the throat when she learned he’d hit her, despite him being a couple heads higher than our mum). I truly hope you have someone now who would fight for your honour or at least be there to pick you up when life knocks you down. 🥺💔🦋

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Marco Conti
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow, as a father myself, let me count the ways your dad is a low life douchebag.

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Mike Loux
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hope that you repaid him in kind later in life. He absolutely deserves to be slapped repeatedly

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Bubbles and sparks
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

WTF? I'm so sorry this happened to you... I hope you find the strenght to create new memories around thanksgiving, ones that make you happy. Your spermdonor sounds like a horrible person (refuse to call him "man" because real men don't need to be that nasty to feel good about themselves) by the sound of it, the family that was there was scared of him too, but that no one stood up against him for brutally mistreating a little child, that makes me mad... Please, don't measure your selfworth by his actions, you grew up to become a much better person then he coud ever be. His opinion about you says nothing about you, it only says everything about him and what a sh*tty personality hes got. Hugs...

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Sophia Rose
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

your dad was a little bitch, and if he is still alive, he still is. What goes through people's heads to make them feel like they have a right to act like that.

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Monica Sargent
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Just to be clear, I hate your dad too. You are not a disappointment. It's sad that even with glasses on, he couldn't see the miracle that you are.

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Seedy Vine
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Your family sŮcks, OP. Hope you found better people. You deserve it.

idrow avatar
Id row
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is truly awful. That's something you carry with you for life and you remember like it was yesterday, even if decades have passed. What a rotten human being he is.

albertkay51 avatar
Kayla Albert
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow! Your father is the one who is a disappointment! To say is horrible!! I hope your doing well and have cut off all contact with this pitiful excuse of a man!

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Jon Steensen
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Don't lie, but knowing when no good will result from telling certain "facts", or know how to convey a message in the best way is an important skill to master.

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Sadie
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You are not the disappointment, your father is. Bro he sounds so mean

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Ilia Bauer
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow. Screw him. And screw the rest of your family for not jumping down his throat for that.

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Sherilynne DeMaio
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Looks to me like you've found 58 people who, sight unseen, KNOW you are a better, more deserving human being than he is. He's not who matters, YOU are. You do matter. Live your best life.

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Gingergirl
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mother was telling me how she had run into an old friend who had asked after my son, her only grandson. She replied “Oh he’s just a loser, always will be”….I left her house and never went back.

amberfreeman_1 avatar
Amber.exe (She/They)
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Who in their mind think that's okay to say,his own daughter was 10,and even though parents have favorites they have a right mind not to say it. He's not a father,he's a sperm donor. If he can't appreciate you,he doesn't deserve the title of a father

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Nikki Sevven
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He's not your father, because that's not how fathers behave. Please know that this is not a "you" problem; it's 100% a "him" problem.

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Carole Strawn
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a pathetic excuse for a father. You are fine. I can't say the same for him.

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Yvette Desmarais
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'd have just left. I think I pissed off my step by arguing back at her about Covid. Now I'm not invited to her house. Which has been my father's home for 34 years but still her house. Too bad. So sad. Don't care.

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BoredPanda
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wow that's horrible. I would hide a penny in his stuffing and hope he chokes on it.

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bruh JJ’s
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That guy sucks. You’re probably awesome and should create your own thanksgiving tradition with your chosen family.

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Notyomama
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My Dad said, what I thought, was some very horrible things to me. But we weren't around anyone else. Never said anything to my Grandparents (who raised me.) While those things he said were awful, he waited until they were both gone to get really nasty and hateful. Why? Because my Grandfather would have kicked the c**p out of him and he would've lost that fight. No. My Pop was not abusive in any way, but he LOVED his grand children and great grand child. He also had extra muscles in his arms that was discovered during a surgery. Apparently,, I was unwanted by my parents and the only reason I was born and not aborted, like several others, was because he was going to divorce my egg donor. There were even worse things said than that. Frankly, with my health now and all of the abuse I endured from both parents and others, it would have been better to have just been aborted.

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TurquoiseTzarina
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

No, it would not have been better. You're a gem and don't you ever think otherwise. Hugs and love to you!

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Mary Kay Mann
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What is wrong with people?? Who says that about their child? Or any child!!

moski16 avatar
Abi
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And this is how you start a trauma that requires therapy

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GayBoi
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hope you are in a better place now and have cut your dad off. Abuse is never okay.

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Jessica Julian
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Families, and I use the term "family" loosely, like these, are why therapists will never run out of patients.

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Seabeast
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Don't expect to get visited in the nursing home when you get old, dad.

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Carolyn Stokes
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Your Dad is horrible, you're not a disappointment he's the one with issues not you xx

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Azure Adams
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hope you do not speak with him anymore. Or his sorry excuse of a family. You are not a disappointment. He is a total f*** up as a human.

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#8

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community Saw my great uncle for the first time in years, first thing he says to me is "wow, you've grown! In many ways..." * Looks at my chest*.
Wtf Uncle Jeff, not cool bro

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#9

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community My grandmother: "Nice boys don't like fat girls, Mija," and then she got upset when I wouldn't eat the huge plate of food she served me. I was 9 or 10.

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#10

When I was 17, we were preparing to have a regular dinner, with my grandma coming over as an extra guest.
The table was set, main course needed more time to finish cooking, and I was in the living room watching Cartoon Network as it didn't require a lot of attention and besides I like cartoons of all kind.
My grandma arrived and passed through the living room where she saw me watching tv. She stittered, loooed at me shocked and said " You
..still watch kid stuff?". I didn't bother explaining that lots of cartoons nowadays have subtle queues to relate for a mature audience as well, so I just replied "Uh, yeah, what of it?".
Later during dinner, my grandma would address my father with a concerned face and would say " You should take your son to see a psychiatrist." ( my father froze mid-sip and gazed at her questioningly ) " I caught him watching children's stuff on TV. This isn't right I believe he might be memtally undeveloped. I still want to have great-grandchildren!".
I was right next to her, contemplating how not to explode right there and then.
35 years old now. With a 9 month old baby boy, engaged. Still watching Avatar, Family Guy and whatever the hell I want, probably will watch cartoons till I die.

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#11

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community It was my very first art exhibition and I invited all of my family.. at the end of the show we all gathered outside to chat and in front of everyone, my dad walked up to me and handed me 5$ saying: here, have an allowance, because no one will buy these paintings!

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#12

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community My ex-MIL referring to the local shop owner who was an Asian man: "We don't like those sort of people here". This was on Walney Island, Barrow in Furness, Cumbria. Said ex-MIL was also probably one of the most boring people in existence in addition to being racist, having no interests, never read any books, just trashy magazines, never watched any films or listened to music, knew nothing about history or current affairs but full of negative opinions about others, while claiming to be a Christian and having the audacity to tell me I'll go to hell. The shop owner, btw, was always pleasant, friendly, helpful and courteous.

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PixxelDust
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

sounds like the shop owner would have been a better person to have as a relative than that b***

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#13

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community My grandmas raised me saying things like "No man will ever love you if you don't..." (have long hair, dress like a lady, learn how to cook...). It hurt me a lot but especially subconsciously. I really grew up believing that the idea of me dating was ridiculous.

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#14

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community I was raised by my grandmother. She used to say that no one with a working brain will ever love me because I was so "rebellious". So when I got a partner, she always says what a blessing it is, him not being intelligent enough to realize the fact of me being the mess I am, and I should thank all heavens for him being "dumb enough to be with you".
I'm very very grateful for him being the amazing and loving partner he is, but I keep hearing my grandmother's voice inside my thoughts. Also she passed away like 20 or so years ago. I never went to the graveyard.

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#15

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community "If you don't want kids you just haven't found the right guy yet!" My boyfriend was right by my side

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#16

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community Wow! You got fat! - my aunt on the day of my dad's funeral.

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#17

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community Every time I see my family, a few people comment on how I “need to eat more” or “you are too skinny”. I absolutely hate when people say that because I am very insecure about my body. (Also first post lol)

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#18

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community Uncle asked me why my sweater was dirty. Said I should have dressed nicer. We had no way to wash clothes, had no food a lot of the time, and no new clothes. Everything was hand me downs. Parents spent clothing allotments from welfare on themselves. Rest of the family cared so little and/or were so oblivious to their black sheep son and his wife's children ... when we went into foster care, none of them, all well off, would take us in. Another uncle called us insects.

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#19

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community When I was six I had drawn a picture for my Auntie and when I gave it to her she said, "uh... ah..no." then threw it in the bin in front of me.

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#20

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community You could never pass as a boy, darling.

Said by my mother to young trans me still trying to figure things out. Jokes on her I get "misgendered" every single day by people who don't even know me so I'm obviously doing something right.

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#21

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community When I was thirteen, my mother scolded me (in front of a table full of people) for “flirting” with an adult male. I was mortified, especially as I had just laughed at one of the man’s jokes.

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neilbidle avatar
Devil's Advocate
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Unfortunately she might have noticed the man flirting with you which you didn't notice yourself at only 13?

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#22

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community Not at a family gathering, but I once had overheard my parents complaining about me and wishing that I was never born. It hurt a lot, and because I wasn’t supposed to hear their conversation I have to pretend to be oblivious and still act like I care for them.

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WillemPenn
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

IDK how old you are, but when you get out from under your parents' roof, remember you do not owe them anything. And there are lots of places where you can find support from others who come from abusiva and neglectful home. You are not alone. Your life matters. You matter.

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#23

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community I hadn't seen my dad in a couple of years, due to distance. I went to my little brother's wedding. The very first thing dad said to me, loud enough for everyone to hear, was, "WOW! You got fat!" Of course, everyone had to turn around to see whom he was talking to.

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Charlene Wilbur
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

First thing it if my dads mouth every time he sees me is about my weight. So frustrating!

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#24

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community At a family reunion on my mother's side, my father was repeatedly asked why I (younger daughter) didn't have any children, after all, my sister (3 years older) was already married and has two wonderful children. He got so annoyed about it that he announced that I was a lesbian. The family avoided me for the rest of the meeting.

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#25

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community Had an in-law try to pick a physical fight with me at a funeral because I removed him from Facebook.

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#26

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community TLDR version: I was told by my stepmother that I ruined our family Christmas, simply by being there.

Long version: I had a... troubled childhood, to say the least, too much to really go into, and honestly, I've blocked lots of it out and don't remember many details. I was extremely depressed, suicidal at times, and was violently acting out. My stepmother was the target of a lot of my distress, even though she wasn't necessarily the cause of it. My dad, and her, I guess, tried to help me as best as they could, but it got to the point where they didn't know what else to do, and sent me to a therapeutic boarding school. Part of the school's program involved home visits at specified times, and mine happened to line up with Christmas. When I got home, my stepmother was saying things along the lines of "it was so calm and quiet when you were gone, I was actually happy." I was trying to let things go, not make trouble, and repair the damage I'd done. Christmas morning, when we were all gathered around the tree, she looked me dead in the eyes and said "I hate that you're here. Just... you being here has ruined Christmas."

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#28

2 things, both said by in-laws. 1- at a restaurant to waitress, “that’s our last grandkid. No more bcuz we can’t afford them.” We’ve never asked them for anything for the kids. And made me want to get prego just to show her! 2- estate sale for great granny passing, diff ppl walking through the house to buy stuff. Lil old ladies coming through, saw 1 put a trinket in her purse w/o paying. I let it go, wasn’t worth it. A young black guy came in looking for angels for his mom. He was a hard working kid, I knew he was good and had a good heart. FIL followed him all around. FIL and MIL both said at diff times, “those are the ones you have to watch.” I was so disgusted! That’s when I saw their true selves. I stay away and keep my kids away from them as much as possible.

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Caro Caro
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh Sh!t, you are right about keeping the kids away from them.

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#29

After I admitted I'd been raped, my Mother stated "You deserved everything that happened to you. You're no daughter of mine, you're disgusting really".

Needless to say, I no longer have a family.

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emilymrangel avatar
over it already
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Dammit! My heart breaks for anyone who has had a parent react like this to anything at all, but ESPECIALLY rape. What a sh*tty, cold-hearted response. They lost you because they didn't deserve you. I hope you find love, peace, and healing.

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#30

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community My grandmother when I was maybe 11:
"Oh you've gained weight again, and why are you still dressed like a boy"? After that she forced me to try on my great grandmother's moldy fur coat and asked me why I didn't like boys...
Ah family, great memories.

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Caro Caro
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

An 11 year old should wear jeans, t-shirt and sneakers! Did she get out the fake "stick-on" beauty patch for you?

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#31

My mom wouldn't let me get rainbow Vans.

Me: Mom, can I have those Vans?
Her: The rainbow ones? Ew, no.
Me: Why not?
Her, speaking quietly: I don't want people to think you are gay.
Me: But there's nothing wrong with it!
Her: Yes there is, I will not let you get them.
Me: Fine. *rolls eyes*

Since she doesn't know the pride flags, I got some blue-purple-pink ones instead. I'm bi-ace. Lol.

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#32

After having had a car accident which left me crippled with back pain, I resumed swimming at 35. I started at my worst shape ever, my cardio was horrible and I was at pretty much double the weight my Dr would've liked me to be at.

At first, I couldn't 2 laps in a row without stopping to catch my breath and/or using my inhaler. After about 3 months, I could do 70 laps in a row, so I joined the local Triathlon club's swimming class to improve my technique.

Another 3 months later, I'm now swimming around 100-120 laps 3 times a week, and sharing at Christmas diner that my goal is to be able to swim a 3k race in a lake in an open water event the next summer.

My dad : yeah, but it's easy for you.
Me, looking at him quizzically
My dad, cracking up at his own joke : Well, just look at marine mammals!

So yeah, basically not dying, overcoming the trauma of the accident, transforming myself through sheer willpower into someone worthy of swimming alongside college students 15 years younger than myself DESPITE carrying the extra burden of my weight, that makes me a whale, manatee or beluga. And it's easy cause I "float".

Great. Thanks dad.

I looked away and spoke to my siblings the rest of the meal.

Kinda pisses me off that no one ever tells him off though. But whatever. People who see me swim call me a mermaid or a Valkyrie. I'm kind of both, and I love it.

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#33

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community "You are so pretty when you aren't heavy" - courtesy of my MIL, a few months after giving birth to her second grandchild from us in two years. (I gained about 35 pounds for the first and 2 pounds on top of that for the second). Meanwhile, her other son is a good 20 pounds underweight from switching to "healthier food intake". He was never overweight.

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#34

When I got the call that I have the job I wanted for years (after years of part time jobs and bad payment) I went to tell it my family their answer was “you’ll never know what might happen in the future so don’t be to happy about that”

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#35

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community Step-uncle-in-law gave me advice about giving birth

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#36

My Aunt had a habit every time she saw me, she’d say “showing a bit too much cleavage there honey!” She would then grab the neckline of whatever I was wearing at the time and trying to tug it up…………I mentioned it to mum and informed her from then on I planned to wear my most low cut shirts/dresses………She approved!

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kathala-21 avatar
I am a robot
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Great response! Your aunt's physical behaviour also makes one wonder whether SHE wasn't enjoying the cleavage a bit too much herself...

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#37

The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community “Are you gay or just dumb” -Grandma 2020

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#38

My 71yo Aunt's husband who looked at my 21yo nigerian girlfriend saying that her skin color give him so much butterfly "down there"... My aunt was present so has my GF's mom...

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#39

Thirty years ago, my aunt (dad's sister) took me out to dinner to make sure I knew that the reason I was raped during a home intrusion a year earlier was because my mom was a whore when she was my age (she wasn't a virgin when she married my dad so... whore). "Sins of the father" type of bullshit.
She had only just found out about the assault because my dad made me keep it a secret from that side of the family or she would've informed me when it happened, I'm sure.

Cherry on top was becoming the "bad guy" in the family because I refused to be anywhere she was - I was supposed to put my feelings aside so as not to disrupt the family.

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Viviane
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Horrible human being. She's also deluded if she thinks that nuns are immune to sexual assault, let alone victim-blaming old bitches. It can happen to boys and men, too. Sounds like your father knew his sister was a judgmental, punitive shithead.

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#40

"Stop crying all the time." My grandma told me the day afther my mom killed herself. I was nine years old.

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#41

Someone at a wedding came up next to me and literally slapped my leg, remarking "that's for having tattoos!". If it had been a stranger I think I'd have punched them.

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#42

10 years of my life: elderly parents got sick, quit my job, moved in to take care them. Mom died in 6, Dad 4 years later. My older bro and younger sis did not visit, rarely called. After the reading of the will, brother said, “Your free ride is over. Get out. We’re (sister & him) selling the house.” I did corner bro at Dad’s funeral and said: “Your daughter saw how treated your parents. She will do the same to you.” Rest of the family hasn’t spoken to me since. Good riddance.

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Caro Caro
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Octavia, sorry for your loss and thanks for taking care of your parents. But happy for the loss of those sh!tty siblings.

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#43

Cousin told me at Christmas time 2016 that I wasn't liked by anyone in the family because of my severe anger issues and autism. I know it wasn't true and he was just annoyed at me for being sad that my other cousins got camcorders and gopros and stuff and I got cheap dresses, but it still made me uncomfortable and angry

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Bama Belle
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, my sister pulled that s**t. 'Nobody likes you. We all talk about it. Even momma and daddy.'

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#44

Oh you're here, we thought you would be staying home again

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#45

"Where's your "boyfriend"?" They used air quotes and everything! My reply was, "He's working." He always works weekends, still does and now he's my husband, I eventually had him take a Saturday off so they he could meet some of my more extended family.

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Joey Marlin
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I started pretending my husband was working so he didn't have to put up with my relatives. They do know he exists though.

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#46

My mothers uncle telling me that my boos are just the perfect size when I was only 14.

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#47

Not uncomfortable for me per say because I agreed and appreciated the sentiment, but definitely not the time lol. A little back story . My fiance' and I bought our first home and after it closed we took a trip to his family home state across the country. I had spoken to his grandparents regularly on the phone so they "knew" me but never met me in person. (they are in their 70's / 80's so no technology to video chat). It was my Fiance, me, his brother, his wife, and father all going. Brother J and his wife are a bit famous in the family because wifey is a gold digger and lazy. She never works, and when she does doesn't hold a job for more than a month or so. Spends all his money and when he was deployed there were other questions in the family about her faithfulness, anyhow... Grandpa is in his late 70's and is an old Puerto Rican New Yorker, he gives ZERO f***s about couth. (one thing I adore about him actually) Once we physically met we were instant pals and I adore this man immensely. We all went out for supper the first night and everyone was chatting and catching up. Out of nowhere gramps turns to Wifey and says "So you got a job yet?" She said laughing "No grandpa I'm a stay at home mom" "Why???" He boomed. "Kids have school no? What you need to stay home for now? They aren't in diapers." He looked at me. I thought oh s**t, my turn. "What about you? You still working?" "Yes Grandpa I am." "Still doing 35 hour of overtime a week?" "Yes Grandpa" "Ohhh so you don't live off my Grandson huh? That's good, that's good. How long do you have now at you job?" (15 years grandpa... almost 16." (Turning to her) "Huh so you retire in a few years then? Weird, see (Wife) it's not that hard." I about fell over laughing but held it together. Although awkward, it was nice to know I am not on that man's bad side. I'd like to feel bad for (Wife) but I can't I wasn't raised to take advantage of people and it didn't even bother her. When we got home she had a job handed to her on a silver platter. Work from home, great benefits and great money courtesy of my fiance. She quit just over a month later.

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#48

I could take up this whole thread with my mother-in-law but one time she asked my husband what my bra size is.

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#49

Made lots of jokes about mental disorders, and a good deal of homophobic comments.

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Samantha Lomb
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

People of color and people who don't speak English in my extended family. and my mom used to wonder why I never wanted to go for Thanksgiving. She no longer wonders

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#50

There's just always that one relative or a family member who has a lot of obnoxious stuff to say, nobody likes to hear it, but still has to. It seems like a magical ability to just share things that nobody wants to hear.

One relative of mine just talks non-stop about her ailments, it's depressing. The other just had some really unpleasant opinions.

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Guðrún Sveinsdóttir
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have two cousins my age ca 40 who both are mentally disabled whom I love dearly but while one of them is so funny and outgoing, the other one is not and talks about weird stuff like the colour on rocks or something extremely boring and the one outgoing who is more disabled, doesn't have the patience to talk to the other and afterwards she is worned out of her mind. But they are so sweet and precious and I'm blessed to have grown up with them🥰❤❤❤❤

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