Teen Reports Teacher Who Did Not Let Her Leave To Go To The Bathroom After She Felt Her Period Starting
Periods come, often uninvited at unforgiving moments of our daily lives. This is something women learn at an early age, and school is often one of those environments where we face the first experiences with our ever-changing bodies, until we get comfortable and secure about it all.
A 16-year-old female teenager is one of many young women who knows how it feels. “My school requires us to keep our cameras on during the entire class. If we need to use the restroom we are supposed to privately message our teacher and ask to leave,” she wrote in a lengthy post on Reddit where she shared a story of her teacher refusing to let her out to the bathroom because her period started.
After the author complained about the teacher, she was told she was not the only one to complain about his behavior. And since it may be the last drop in the bucket for his job at school, the author started wondering whether her complaint was really the right thing to do.
The 16-year-old student recently shared a story of how her teacher told her to control herself when she asked to use the bathroom as her period started
Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio (not the actual photo)
Dealing with your first menstruation at school age is often stressful enough. But society has made it very clear that the notion of the biological form of bleeding is something that possesses a level and degree of shame.
First, it’s the period stains which many young women are conditioned to believe are the most embarrassing things that can ever happen to them. Think of the countless teen magazines where such “humiliating” period stories are dissected down to every detail, making readers shiver from how relatable it all appears.
Then, it’s the abundance of euphemisms and often very unflattering terms to refer to menstruation, like Aunt Flo, riding the crimson wave, the rag, the curse, on the blob, etc. But aren’t these terms giving us a way to talk about things that are considered cultural taboos? And if so, then what has such a fundamentally normal and human thing like menstruation done to our society to be regarded as one of the taboos?
But to really respect women, we have to embrace menstruation as a natural process which cannot be controlled, which we have not chosen, but have to live with peacefully. Breaking the silence around women’s hygiene needs is more relevant than ever, and it surely starts from a very early age. It’s then that support from fellow male class friends, dads, and brothers plays a crucial role in not adding to the harmful stigma which has been alive for way too long.
And this is what people had to comment on this whole situation
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I can't decide who's the biggest a$$hole here. Your teacher or your male relatives (who I'm pretty sure they can control their farts and burps but still don't)
You are definitely not the asshole. All the people calling you an asshole for it are in fact being assholes. That teacher deserves the complaint and if he loses his job that is on HIM and his behaviour, NOT yours.
Whoever faces a hard-time from being an asshole is the asshole...not the one reporting it.
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I’m glad that the teacher is being investigated. This is absolutely unacceptable behavior. Also, tell your male relatives to mind their own periods. -_-
- "You are fired!" - "But I have a wife, kids, debts, no savings..." - "You should have planned better"
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Absolutely! I'm pretty sure that if she had messaged the teacher that she cut herself and needed to get something to stop the bleeding, she would have been excused, but since the blood is coming from her vagina, that's somehow less of a priority and she just needs to sit there and bleed?
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Not only was the teacher an asshole, he was a sadistic asshole. He couldn't let a kid go to the bathroom for what, 10 minutes? If it was a kid with food poisoning, is the teacher going to make them s**t themselves? This teacher needs to be disciplined and possibly shouldn't be teaching at all, if he's so apathetic that he is making children suffer.
I am glad to say for a fact that if this had happened to me both my father and brother would have been squarely on my side. In fact my dad would have been the one to make the complaint and made sure to meet the teacher in person just to tell him how little he thought of him. If her father and brother are on the side of the teacher then her mother should have strong words with them. As for the friends? Dump them. She deserves a better class of friends. Preferably ones with more than a few brain cells.
this ticked me off that this crap is still happening. 40+ yrs ago this happened but my school did not have vending machines in bathrooms, etc. so i walked from my closed campus at break to store to buy. on way back principal saw me returned & followed me to bathroom. he demanded why i left campus & i was too embarassed to say. he calls mom who comes down. i whisper to her why i left school & she tells him, watching his turn red, & demands why girl's needs aren't being met at school. she was very polite but graphic about how embarassing such situations are. he had nothing to say back. shortly after vending machines showed up in girl's bathroom.
It was the same in my school. We were only allowed to go to the bathroom in between classes, so not during the class but also not during recess (they had outside bathrooms but they closed them so they wouldn’t need to clean). As a teenagers I had extremely strong periods and It was a nightmare. I kept bleeding in my pants and chair because I wasn’t able often to be a whole hours without changing my pad. I hate them for doing that to us.
And this is why men need education on how menstruation works. The only person NTA in this whole scenario is the student.
Wow, the teacher is definitely the arsehole, as are her male relatives. How did the teacher know this girl didn't have abnormally heavy/painful periods? When I was 14 I was put on the pill because mine were so painful and heavy and lasted for two weeks at a time. This was the 90s and the teachers were really unkind about it then too. I have no idea why some men think they know more about menstruation than the women experiencing it, it's so degrading and patronising. And why do some of them think it can be 'held in'?? I wish these morons could experience it for themselves.
"learn to control yourself" what we she supposed to do? cancel her monthly subscription for her period?? like- that's not how it works :D...
I tried to cancel my period subscription, and all I got was this stupid baby. And I got resubscribed again without my permission!
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It is teachers like these who teach the good kids to grow up corrupted. What did she really learn from this experience? "So... this is what you get for being fair, honest and obedient. Had I just pretended I had an equipment malfunctioning, maybe I wouldn't be in trouble?" Next time, she may choose to lie, when she shouldn't have to. And all this because of a natural occurrence? It was so immature of the teacher to "handle" the situation this way. As for her male relatives, they're ignoring the fact hers was not the only and first complaint.
This is triggering me on so many levels. As a woman, a teacher, a student and a human being....I can't believe this is happening in the 21st century. Whaaat?! Is this some kind of a 3rd world country, where people lack basic biology, sex education, let alone basic human empathy or something.? This person totally deserves to lose his job. Stupidity and lack of respect shouldn't be tolerated, supported and encouraged. This will never happen in my country (Bulgaria). Such a "teacher" will be fired and mocked by everyone. Actually a lot of girls with strong period cramps take sick leaves for a few days every month and no one bats an eye. It saddens me there are places in the world where men are still entitled to dictate women and on top of it they lack the smallest knowledge of what a woman and her body is. That's like telling a woman who says oh, I'm giving birth, you should have planned it better. Control yourself. This man is a cavemen, let alone a teacher.
People usually don't lack those things in 3rd world countries. People are poorer in them.
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I'm stuck at the word a-hole. How can a father call his daughter that, for whatever reason?
Hi Vicky. This (like most of these stories) was taken from Reddit. In case you're unfamiliar with Reddit, one of their biggest communities is AITA (am i the asshole). Her father/brother/friends aren't calling her that. They think in context that, she is TA. They never said that she's an asshole, they said they think she was in the wrong.
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NTA. Not even for a second think of yourself as one for this instance. I still fail to understand grown ass people with jobs like teacher fail as basic biology. Either Mr. T lacks knowledge of how bodies work or he is too much of misogynist. School system will be better off without him.
OMG, I feel so bad for these people gladly i only have one male teacher and he understands! I know what these people are going through I once had a teacher FEMALE who said oh you're fine it's not your time of the month stop trying to use that excuse to get out of class. I was like what!? I just got up and left and holy cow she was pissed! i got 5 infractions which is detention but I got out of it because my Mom and Dad called the school.
The teacher is facing his consequences and that's one thing. But a seriously big FU to the dad and brother. Sticking up for a man they don't even know when he made their daughter/sister suffer. I hope she gets the support she needs from her mother, because it's totally lacking elsewhere.
My dear, you are NOT the asshole! I grew up with 2 sisters and a Mom who was a gynecologist. I was married twice and raised 4 girls (2 adopted!) As a daddy, I never had any bothers about going into a store to get pads or tampons for my girls. It's a fact of life... and men... (or dare I say boys, if you can't handle it) need to get some serious education as what... 51% of the world's population has to deal with this? Come on guys!
Period beside, why would a student need to explain anything more beyond a message that they had to go to the bathroom? It's sad that there has to be a validation to use a bathroom during a class.
Exactly. It didnt need to be the period. Also men also have unplanned problems like diarreah.
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Plan? Plan??? Even if we keep a consecutive count on our days, periods sometimes show up unexpectedly! Everything about this...just...AGH! Should "forget" to wear a pad when the dad and brother need to do the laundry. Let them see what happens when a girl can't get a pad or tampon in time and figure how to wash blood out of the underwear.
Not only that, but it's hard when even another woman doesn't understand. I started my periods when I was 13. By 16, my periods were so heavy and so painful, I'd be doubled over for the first couple of days. I'd tell this to my mother time and again, but she always thought I was using it as an excuse to get out of doing chores. Until the day she made me go out and mow the lawn. I got halfway through and couldn't finish the pain was so bad. When my mother sent my sister out to yell at me, my sister screamed for my mother...I'd bled through my jeans heavily. My mother rushed me to the ER and they informed her I had endometriosis. She never apologized for all the years she thought I was lying and was legitimately angry at me that I had a valid illness. It's not just the men who are a**holes sometimes.
I am very sorry that this happened to you. I am also an endo patient and Its horrible. My parents and doctors never believed me no matter how many times I fainted. How are you doing?
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Wow. Just, an incredible, massive, big fat wow. That is messed up. There's almost no reason to decline to someone going to the bathroom at all, let alone a girl having her period. And for him to say that she should control herself better? My gosh. This just proves that he knows nothing about the female body. He should be fired if this wasn't even his first complaint. Something's very fishy with him getting a lot of complaints.
WTF IS THIS!!! Nobody chose to spend a week every month bleeding, we can't control it! I can't believe that someone could be so stupid and ignorant. EXCUSE ME for getting my period, I wasn't aware it was my fault! (sorry for the rant, I'm just super irritated with these idiotic guys)
How difficult is it to understand how biology works? Come one fellow men, read about it! If not for your wife, sister or other relatives, do it for your future daughter. It's not that much of work to read about it and don't act like a douche.
The same thing happened to me except the man did not lose his job I got suspended for Complaining about and the teaher of course writed me up and now I am suspended for a week
I used to have a male teacher and when I would tell him I needed to go to the bathroom he let me. He is a coach for some sport so he would understand. Thank God he didn't tell me I needed to hold it in. Also, people with periods should stop being shamed. We can't control it, and neither can the other person. I think it should be a school rule to let people with periods go to the bathroom instead of holding it in.
WTF is wrong with him!? I am soo angry at the fact that the male relatives weren't supportive.
Punished Edward she was following the rules of everyday life for women that men like you have no knowledge of bc women don't like you. You don't follow rules of polite society or the rules on this website but that's ok for you. You're a misogynist a racist and a coward. Every single post screams of insecurity and I will bet w certainty you have a police record of abusing women children and animals.
Yeah, it is actually quite hard to remove period blood from underwear. Infact, they all have a bit of staining that I cant get out. I try to put in a tampon (cant stand pads) before I start, but its tricky to know when I'll start.
Maybe you could try cotton pads. They dont retain a lot but they are great for the begining or to complement the cup/tampons :)
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What's remarkable is that her MALE family members call her the a-hole, proving they know as little about menstruation as the teacher. There are few things as uncomfortable as feeling your period starting and having to sit there..
They are not the asshole at all. That teacher is really just rude and ignorant. I mean, he didn't even let her go after she told him that she had started her period. He should at least have the basic understanding that women need to put on a pad or tampon unless they want it all over their pants. Thankfully this has never happened to me, (yet) but I do feel bad for her.
F that guy. You took care of your needs and he was out of line not letting you go. It's a good thing you were doing online classes so you could just ignore him instead of being in person where you may have been subject to a much more horrible experience.
To all men who dont understand: Try controlling your need to blink.
Or remember how it was last time they cut their finger. Could they control the blood? Obviously not.
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"planned better", I just LOVE when idiots come up with that argument. Few women are so lucky that their period arrives on every 28th day and it is not like our calendar would look like "16th November, Thursday, 9.30 AM" In my own humble experience, periods may come and go as they please plus they are being influenced by so many things like stress, weather, sport, even food! How to plan better? Are we supposed run around all the time with a tampon stuffed in our vagina "just in case"?!?!
I am a teacher. I taught 8th grade last year. When it came to going to the bathroom, my 4th period was the worst. The class was right before lunch, kids were tired and wanted a break. So a lot of them asked to go to the bathroom so they could get out of class. It got to the point where I had to make a rule of no more than 3 students during class could go to the restroom. In this particular situation, I think the teacher was in the wrong, especially after the student told him she was on her period. That being said, when teachers act out, especially quiet ones, it's usually because there is a lot that they put up with and they just reach a breaking point. Not sure if that was the case here, though.
When I was in Highschool I went up to my male teacher to ask if I could go to the locker room and the bathroom. Our locker room was locked during class time. I said it was important. He said "maybe if it's so important you should keep it in your pencil case." So being unashamed I said loud enough for the whole class to hear "I'm not keeping period pads in my pencil case!" He went white and said "just go". Never laughed so hard in my life.
Everyone but the woman is the ahole. Why is it still a big deal to go to the bathroom? Especially for online, it shouldn't be any more difficult than saying "be right back. I have to go to the bathroom". There are only a few appropriate responses to this situation. They are "Thanks for letting us know" and "Are you feeling ok".
His fault. His horrid, ignorant behavior is going to make him lose his job. Or at least it should.
NTA. The dude seems to think you can hold in your period like your bladder but that's not how it works. And your male relatives? Um, well, they're also TA.
In this situation, the teacher and all of her male relatives are the assholes. Women can not plan for their period and anyone who believes that is an idiot.
'Bros before hoes' and hoes clearly include daughters and sisters. Nooen will get fired because of one such complaint, And why are so many people so incedibly ignorant about anatomy??
This isnt a f*****g story! They werent in a classroom setting. My 13 year old son did online for most of the pandemic and NONE of his classmates had their cameras on ever. Id give him s**t and tell him to have his camera on because the teacher isnt Blind or talking to walls. If she wants to go to the bathroom in her own house than she just does that. Most kids dont even show up to the zoom meetings on time
That depends on your school. Mine we have to have our cameras on.
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You are not an asshole. He should've let you go, thats the stupidest thing I've ever heard. I'm glad I have mostly female teachers, who understand things like this.
The student is not an asshole, and asking for permission to go to the bathroom shouldn't be the thing. Just switch your camera off and go. You always can say you had a problem with your camera/internet connection. Technologies sometimes act up and they don't ask whether it's permitted or not.
The teacher's behaviour was terribly wrong and he deserved to be reported, no matter if he is losing his job. On the other hand, I am afraid that in few years I won't be able to understand without google what people are writing. I had to search what means AITA and NTA. And I am not that old, but I still don't understand why it is so hard to write in such way that everybody can understand. :(
The acronyms are all part of the lingo of a particular sub-reddit. there is absolutely no reason you'd know it unless you frequent AITA . You're not 'old' or out of it, just unfamiliar with a very specific thing. For everyone: AITA means Am I the Asshole which is the name of the sub-reddit. NTA means not the asshole. YTA means you're the asshole. ESH means everyone sucks here. NAH-no assholes here. Now if you ever want to visit (I don't recommend it) you'll be all over the lingo!
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I don't understand why she should feel guilty because an idiot person who shouldn't even teach and has many other complaints might lose his job!! There are many other people more capable to teach that know how period works (for f**k's sake) and are unemployed!!! I don't even want to speak about the male relatives that are on his side! Speak up! Always speak up until all of these idiots go back into their holes!
In high school a teacher wouldnt let a girl go to tje bathroom for that and she proceeded to get up and sit on his desk. She didnt get in trouble and the school told all teachers to let a student go to the bathroom when needed. I hate that we still have to let/ask to go to bathroom as adults too.
Assholes like this teacher, these male relatives and male friends are the reason why men should be taught about how women's bodies work for real. There's way too many guys out there who think that we can keep our periods in, or that it all comes out in one go, or that one tampon or pad is enough for the whole period, how horrible pain is completely normal (some women are guilty of this one too though. 1/10 women suffer from endometriosis and we're often not taken seriously and there's even people in healthcare that don't "believe" in endometriosis) and THERE'S WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE WHO THINK THAT SANITARY PRODUCTS ARE ESSENTIAL! There's way too many women that can't afford what they need and it's disgusting!
I'm not trying to be gross but starting your period it's warm, stinks, it's not completely watery so it's just there, it doesn't stop so builds up and did I mention it smells. Not everyone gets warnings so for him to tell you to plan it is wrong that's like saying just cross your legs and hold it in
This whole thread makes me so angry. The fact that she is being bullied for reporting a situation, especially through the appropriate channels that the school provided, is inexcusable. This is the same behavior that prevents people from reporting greater harrassments and assualts. Definitely NTA. I really hope this experience doesn't prevent her from speaking out in the future if need be.
I can relate. It happened to me in person in my freshmen year in highschool 1988. But the teacher was a girl, that's the most astonishing. Back at that you could not report, but I got two other teacher witnessing me in pain at the bathroom. However, the next year my class got a different teacher, the other was gone.
No reason for you to feel guilty. You did a favour for all the young women who now, will not have to deal with this ignorant jerk. He owes you an apology. Your Mom should educate your Dad & Brothers; and even if they don't understand something, they should at least support You!
He should have lost 3/4s of his manhood along with the job. F**k him and anyone who would defend that type of ignorance.
In this situation you're allowed to leave. Just leave. You can go to the principal afterwards and explain.
I dont know to me they are all just the highest ranking of A-holes there are
Education is very important! It's what gives us the information to perform better in life. Any missed opportunity for learning is a bad thing! Lost opportunities might be lost forever and the lesson never learnt. It is so important that the teacher and the males in this girls life learn a lesson!
Ya'll need to teach your kids that asking to use the bathroom is a courtesy towards the teachers....they can go at any time, this is not prison, it is school and they can get up and leave to use the restroom ANY TIME they wish to do so. My childs bladder or period will not be held hostage to any asshole teacher and she knows I will have her back at any level of confrontation she needs to have to get to the restroom.
NTA my daughter had this happen to her in a class with a male teacher and all male students apart from her, he refused to let her go to the loo, come lunchtime, i got a call from school asking me to go up with clean clothes for her, god dam right did I put a complaint in about that teacher, unfortunately he's still there, now bullying my daughters younger friend who is going through some personal issues right now, but his parents are dealing with that. i never spoke to him again, and refused to see him at parents night, spoke to her head of year about that subject instead, and he knew why!
I can't decide who's the biggest a$$hole here. Your teacher or your male relatives (who I'm pretty sure they can control their farts and burps but still don't)
You are definitely not the asshole. All the people calling you an asshole for it are in fact being assholes. That teacher deserves the complaint and if he loses his job that is on HIM and his behaviour, NOT yours.
Whoever faces a hard-time from being an asshole is the asshole...not the one reporting it.
Load More Replies... I’m glad that the teacher is being investigated. This is absolutely unacceptable behavior. Also, tell your male relatives to mind their own periods. -_-
- "You are fired!" - "But I have a wife, kids, debts, no savings..." - "You should have planned better"
Load More Replies... Absolutely! I'm pretty sure that if she had messaged the teacher that she cut herself and needed to get something to stop the bleeding, she would have been excused, but since the blood is coming from her vagina, that's somehow less of a priority and she just needs to sit there and bleed?
Load More Replies... Not only was the teacher an asshole, he was a sadistic asshole. He couldn't let a kid go to the bathroom for what, 10 minutes? If it was a kid with food poisoning, is the teacher going to make them s**t themselves? This teacher needs to be disciplined and possibly shouldn't be teaching at all, if he's so apathetic that he is making children suffer.
I am glad to say for a fact that if this had happened to me both my father and brother would have been squarely on my side. In fact my dad would have been the one to make the complaint and made sure to meet the teacher in person just to tell him how little he thought of him. If her father and brother are on the side of the teacher then her mother should have strong words with them. As for the friends? Dump them. She deserves a better class of friends. Preferably ones with more than a few brain cells.
this ticked me off that this crap is still happening. 40+ yrs ago this happened but my school did not have vending machines in bathrooms, etc. so i walked from my closed campus at break to store to buy. on way back principal saw me returned & followed me to bathroom. he demanded why i left campus & i was too embarassed to say. he calls mom who comes down. i whisper to her why i left school & she tells him, watching his turn red, & demands why girl's needs aren't being met at school. she was very polite but graphic about how embarassing such situations are. he had nothing to say back. shortly after vending machines showed up in girl's bathroom.
It was the same in my school. We were only allowed to go to the bathroom in between classes, so not during the class but also not during recess (they had outside bathrooms but they closed them so they wouldn’t need to clean). As a teenagers I had extremely strong periods and It was a nightmare. I kept bleeding in my pants and chair because I wasn’t able often to be a whole hours without changing my pad. I hate them for doing that to us.
And this is why men need education on how menstruation works. The only person NTA in this whole scenario is the student.
Wow, the teacher is definitely the arsehole, as are her male relatives. How did the teacher know this girl didn't have abnormally heavy/painful periods? When I was 14 I was put on the pill because mine were so painful and heavy and lasted for two weeks at a time. This was the 90s and the teachers were really unkind about it then too. I have no idea why some men think they know more about menstruation than the women experiencing it, it's so degrading and patronising. And why do some of them think it can be 'held in'?? I wish these morons could experience it for themselves.
"learn to control yourself" what we she supposed to do? cancel her monthly subscription for her period?? like- that's not how it works :D...
I tried to cancel my period subscription, and all I got was this stupid baby. And I got resubscribed again without my permission!
Load More Replies... It is teachers like these who teach the good kids to grow up corrupted. What did she really learn from this experience? "So... this is what you get for being fair, honest and obedient. Had I just pretended I had an equipment malfunctioning, maybe I wouldn't be in trouble?" Next time, she may choose to lie, when she shouldn't have to. And all this because of a natural occurrence? It was so immature of the teacher to "handle" the situation this way. As for her male relatives, they're ignoring the fact hers was not the only and first complaint.
This is triggering me on so many levels. As a woman, a teacher, a student and a human being....I can't believe this is happening in the 21st century. Whaaat?! Is this some kind of a 3rd world country, where people lack basic biology, sex education, let alone basic human empathy or something.? This person totally deserves to lose his job. Stupidity and lack of respect shouldn't be tolerated, supported and encouraged. This will never happen in my country (Bulgaria). Such a "teacher" will be fired and mocked by everyone. Actually a lot of girls with strong period cramps take sick leaves for a few days every month and no one bats an eye. It saddens me there are places in the world where men are still entitled to dictate women and on top of it they lack the smallest knowledge of what a woman and her body is. That's like telling a woman who says oh, I'm giving birth, you should have planned it better. Control yourself. This man is a cavemen, let alone a teacher.
People usually don't lack those things in 3rd world countries. People are poorer in them.
Load More Replies... I'm stuck at the word a-hole. How can a father call his daughter that, for whatever reason?
Hi Vicky. This (like most of these stories) was taken from Reddit. In case you're unfamiliar with Reddit, one of their biggest communities is AITA (am i the asshole). Her father/brother/friends aren't calling her that. They think in context that, she is TA. They never said that she's an asshole, they said they think she was in the wrong.
Load More Replies... NTA. Not even for a second think of yourself as one for this instance. I still fail to understand grown ass people with jobs like teacher fail as basic biology. Either Mr. T lacks knowledge of how bodies work or he is too much of misogynist. School system will be better off without him.
OMG, I feel so bad for these people gladly i only have one male teacher and he understands! I know what these people are going through I once had a teacher FEMALE who said oh you're fine it's not your time of the month stop trying to use that excuse to get out of class. I was like what!? I just got up and left and holy cow she was pissed! i got 5 infractions which is detention but I got out of it because my Mom and Dad called the school.
The teacher is facing his consequences and that's one thing. But a seriously big FU to the dad and brother. Sticking up for a man they don't even know when he made their daughter/sister suffer. I hope she gets the support she needs from her mother, because it's totally lacking elsewhere.
My dear, you are NOT the asshole! I grew up with 2 sisters and a Mom who was a gynecologist. I was married twice and raised 4 girls (2 adopted!) As a daddy, I never had any bothers about going into a store to get pads or tampons for my girls. It's a fact of life... and men... (or dare I say boys, if you can't handle it) need to get some serious education as what... 51% of the world's population has to deal with this? Come on guys!
Period beside, why would a student need to explain anything more beyond a message that they had to go to the bathroom? It's sad that there has to be a validation to use a bathroom during a class.
Exactly. It didnt need to be the period. Also men also have unplanned problems like diarreah.
Load More Replies... Plan? Plan??? Even if we keep a consecutive count on our days, periods sometimes show up unexpectedly! Everything about this...just...AGH! Should "forget" to wear a pad when the dad and brother need to do the laundry. Let them see what happens when a girl can't get a pad or tampon in time and figure how to wash blood out of the underwear.
Not only that, but it's hard when even another woman doesn't understand. I started my periods when I was 13. By 16, my periods were so heavy and so painful, I'd be doubled over for the first couple of days. I'd tell this to my mother time and again, but she always thought I was using it as an excuse to get out of doing chores. Until the day she made me go out and mow the lawn. I got halfway through and couldn't finish the pain was so bad. When my mother sent my sister out to yell at me, my sister screamed for my mother...I'd bled through my jeans heavily. My mother rushed me to the ER and they informed her I had endometriosis. She never apologized for all the years she thought I was lying and was legitimately angry at me that I had a valid illness. It's not just the men who are a**holes sometimes.
I am very sorry that this happened to you. I am also an endo patient and Its horrible. My parents and doctors never believed me no matter how many times I fainted. How are you doing?
Load More Replies... Wow. Just, an incredible, massive, big fat wow. That is messed up. There's almost no reason to decline to someone going to the bathroom at all, let alone a girl having her period. And for him to say that she should control herself better? My gosh. This just proves that he knows nothing about the female body. He should be fired if this wasn't even his first complaint. Something's very fishy with him getting a lot of complaints.
WTF IS THIS!!! Nobody chose to spend a week every month bleeding, we can't control it! I can't believe that someone could be so stupid and ignorant. EXCUSE ME for getting my period, I wasn't aware it was my fault! (sorry for the rant, I'm just super irritated with these idiotic guys)
How difficult is it to understand how biology works? Come one fellow men, read about it! If not for your wife, sister or other relatives, do it for your future daughter. It's not that much of work to read about it and don't act like a douche.
The same thing happened to me except the man did not lose his job I got suspended for Complaining about and the teaher of course writed me up and now I am suspended for a week
I used to have a male teacher and when I would tell him I needed to go to the bathroom he let me. He is a coach for some sport so he would understand. Thank God he didn't tell me I needed to hold it in. Also, people with periods should stop being shamed. We can't control it, and neither can the other person. I think it should be a school rule to let people with periods go to the bathroom instead of holding it in.
WTF is wrong with him!? I am soo angry at the fact that the male relatives weren't supportive.
Punished Edward she was following the rules of everyday life for women that men like you have no knowledge of bc women don't like you. You don't follow rules of polite society or the rules on this website but that's ok for you. You're a misogynist a racist and a coward. Every single post screams of insecurity and I will bet w certainty you have a police record of abusing women children and animals.
Yeah, it is actually quite hard to remove period blood from underwear. Infact, they all have a bit of staining that I cant get out. I try to put in a tampon (cant stand pads) before I start, but its tricky to know when I'll start.
Maybe you could try cotton pads. They dont retain a lot but they are great for the begining or to complement the cup/tampons :)
Load More Replies... What's remarkable is that her MALE family members call her the a-hole, proving they know as little about menstruation as the teacher. There are few things as uncomfortable as feeling your period starting and having to sit there..
They are not the asshole at all. That teacher is really just rude and ignorant. I mean, he didn't even let her go after she told him that she had started her period. He should at least have the basic understanding that women need to put on a pad or tampon unless they want it all over their pants. Thankfully this has never happened to me, (yet) but I do feel bad for her.
F that guy. You took care of your needs and he was out of line not letting you go. It's a good thing you were doing online classes so you could just ignore him instead of being in person where you may have been subject to a much more horrible experience.
To all men who dont understand: Try controlling your need to blink.
Or remember how it was last time they cut their finger. Could they control the blood? Obviously not.
Load More Replies... "planned better", I just LOVE when idiots come up with that argument. Few women are so lucky that their period arrives on every 28th day and it is not like our calendar would look like "16th November, Thursday, 9.30 AM" In my own humble experience, periods may come and go as they please plus they are being influenced by so many things like stress, weather, sport, even food! How to plan better? Are we supposed run around all the time with a tampon stuffed in our vagina "just in case"?!?!
I am a teacher. I taught 8th grade last year. When it came to going to the bathroom, my 4th period was the worst. The class was right before lunch, kids were tired and wanted a break. So a lot of them asked to go to the bathroom so they could get out of class. It got to the point where I had to make a rule of no more than 3 students during class could go to the restroom. In this particular situation, I think the teacher was in the wrong, especially after the student told him she was on her period. That being said, when teachers act out, especially quiet ones, it's usually because there is a lot that they put up with and they just reach a breaking point. Not sure if that was the case here, though.
When I was in Highschool I went up to my male teacher to ask if I could go to the locker room and the bathroom. Our locker room was locked during class time. I said it was important. He said "maybe if it's so important you should keep it in your pencil case." So being unashamed I said loud enough for the whole class to hear "I'm not keeping period pads in my pencil case!" He went white and said "just go". Never laughed so hard in my life.
Everyone but the woman is the ahole. Why is it still a big deal to go to the bathroom? Especially for online, it shouldn't be any more difficult than saying "be right back. I have to go to the bathroom". There are only a few appropriate responses to this situation. They are "Thanks for letting us know" and "Are you feeling ok".
His fault. His horrid, ignorant behavior is going to make him lose his job. Or at least it should.
NTA. The dude seems to think you can hold in your period like your bladder but that's not how it works. And your male relatives? Um, well, they're also TA.
In this situation, the teacher and all of her male relatives are the assholes. Women can not plan for their period and anyone who believes that is an idiot.
'Bros before hoes' and hoes clearly include daughters and sisters. Nooen will get fired because of one such complaint, And why are so many people so incedibly ignorant about anatomy??
This isnt a f*****g story! They werent in a classroom setting. My 13 year old son did online for most of the pandemic and NONE of his classmates had their cameras on ever. Id give him s**t and tell him to have his camera on because the teacher isnt Blind or talking to walls. If she wants to go to the bathroom in her own house than she just does that. Most kids dont even show up to the zoom meetings on time
That depends on your school. Mine we have to have our cameras on.
Load More Replies... You are not an asshole. He should've let you go, thats the stupidest thing I've ever heard. I'm glad I have mostly female teachers, who understand things like this.
The student is not an asshole, and asking for permission to go to the bathroom shouldn't be the thing. Just switch your camera off and go. You always can say you had a problem with your camera/internet connection. Technologies sometimes act up and they don't ask whether it's permitted or not.
The teacher's behaviour was terribly wrong and he deserved to be reported, no matter if he is losing his job. On the other hand, I am afraid that in few years I won't be able to understand without google what people are writing. I had to search what means AITA and NTA. And I am not that old, but I still don't understand why it is so hard to write in such way that everybody can understand. :(
The acronyms are all part of the lingo of a particular sub-reddit. there is absolutely no reason you'd know it unless you frequent AITA . You're not 'old' or out of it, just unfamiliar with a very specific thing. For everyone: AITA means Am I the Asshole which is the name of the sub-reddit. NTA means not the asshole. YTA means you're the asshole. ESH means everyone sucks here. NAH-no assholes here. Now if you ever want to visit (I don't recommend it) you'll be all over the lingo!
Load More Replies... I don't understand why she should feel guilty because an idiot person who shouldn't even teach and has many other complaints might lose his job!! There are many other people more capable to teach that know how period works (for f**k's sake) and are unemployed!!! I don't even want to speak about the male relatives that are on his side! Speak up! Always speak up until all of these idiots go back into their holes!
In high school a teacher wouldnt let a girl go to tje bathroom for that and she proceeded to get up and sit on his desk. She didnt get in trouble and the school told all teachers to let a student go to the bathroom when needed. I hate that we still have to let/ask to go to bathroom as adults too.
Assholes like this teacher, these male relatives and male friends are the reason why men should be taught about how women's bodies work for real. There's way too many guys out there who think that we can keep our periods in, or that it all comes out in one go, or that one tampon or pad is enough for the whole period, how horrible pain is completely normal (some women are guilty of this one too though. 1/10 women suffer from endometriosis and we're often not taken seriously and there's even people in healthcare that don't "believe" in endometriosis) and THERE'S WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE WHO THINK THAT SANITARY PRODUCTS ARE ESSENTIAL! There's way too many women that can't afford what they need and it's disgusting!
I'm not trying to be gross but starting your period it's warm, stinks, it's not completely watery so it's just there, it doesn't stop so builds up and did I mention it smells. Not everyone gets warnings so for him to tell you to plan it is wrong that's like saying just cross your legs and hold it in
This whole thread makes me so angry. The fact that she is being bullied for reporting a situation, especially through the appropriate channels that the school provided, is inexcusable. This is the same behavior that prevents people from reporting greater harrassments and assualts. Definitely NTA. I really hope this experience doesn't prevent her from speaking out in the future if need be.
I can relate. It happened to me in person in my freshmen year in highschool 1988. But the teacher was a girl, that's the most astonishing. Back at that you could not report, but I got two other teacher witnessing me in pain at the bathroom. However, the next year my class got a different teacher, the other was gone.
No reason for you to feel guilty. You did a favour for all the young women who now, will not have to deal with this ignorant jerk. He owes you an apology. Your Mom should educate your Dad & Brothers; and even if they don't understand something, they should at least support You!
He should have lost 3/4s of his manhood along with the job. F**k him and anyone who would defend that type of ignorance.
In this situation you're allowed to leave. Just leave. You can go to the principal afterwards and explain.
I dont know to me they are all just the highest ranking of A-holes there are
Education is very important! It's what gives us the information to perform better in life. Any missed opportunity for learning is a bad thing! Lost opportunities might be lost forever and the lesson never learnt. It is so important that the teacher and the males in this girls life learn a lesson!
Ya'll need to teach your kids that asking to use the bathroom is a courtesy towards the teachers....they can go at any time, this is not prison, it is school and they can get up and leave to use the restroom ANY TIME they wish to do so. My childs bladder or period will not be held hostage to any asshole teacher and she knows I will have her back at any level of confrontation she needs to have to get to the restroom.
NTA my daughter had this happen to her in a class with a male teacher and all male students apart from her, he refused to let her go to the loo, come lunchtime, i got a call from school asking me to go up with clean clothes for her, god dam right did I put a complaint in about that teacher, unfortunately he's still there, now bullying my daughters younger friend who is going through some personal issues right now, but his parents are dealing with that. i never spoke to him again, and refused to see him at parents night, spoke to her head of year about that subject instead, and he knew why!
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