They say "There's no such thing as a stupid question." The phrase implies that the quest for knowledge includes failure and the fact that you know less than others must not prevent you from learning. But whether or not you think it's true, I think we can agree that sometimes people present their questions in such a funny way, you don't know if you should just laugh or answer them seriously.
Interested in these situations, Reddit user u/Yurtle_212 submitted the following question to the platform: "What was the stupidest thing someone has asked you 100% seriously?" And everyone immediately started replying with their stories. As of this article, the post has nearly 37K upvotes and 25K comments. Below are some of the best ones.
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The insurance company asked if there was a chance that my dad's amputated leg would grow back.
Of course. It's his secret power because he's half human, half salamander
Waited on a woman who asked me what kind of meat was in our beef taco salad.
Lady: what kind of meat is in your beef taco salad?
Me : Beef
L: what kind of beef?
Me: Beef, ground beef seasoned with taco seasoning.
L: No, I mean is it pork or chicken?
Me: Ma’am, it’s beef, it’s from a cow. It’s beef.
u/Yurtle_212 said they don't remember what exactly inspired them to make this post.
"Some people just don't think before they ask something, but I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing," the Redditor told Bored Panda.
"There definitely are stupid questions. But asking them doesn't make you stupid. [That is if we disregard the ones that are self-explanatory, like] 'What day of the week is Good Friday on?' or "What time is the 3 o'clock parade?'"
My 21 year old sister once asked my entire family at dinner if Nuns don’t have sex where do they get more nuns. That takes the cake for me.
I'm a postpartum nurse. A patient asked me "when will the doctor be here to pierce my nipples so I can breastfeed?"
Because I am a dwarf I get a lot of hilarious ones, but one of my favourites was "do you need to get a smaller engine for your car?"
I really wish I could have seen your internal process that led to that question, lady.
People visiting Alaska on a cruise would walk onto the dock-- a dock portruding into the pacific ocean-- then look up at the mountains and ask what elevation we were at.
1 foot, ma'am. You are standing on a dock which is at sea level.
It was me. I'm white, ended up dating a long time friend of mine, who is black.
We were talking about going to the beach the next day, and I mentioned that I needed to buy some sunscreen. GF tells me she has some, so no worries. I asked her why she had sunscreen.. She was puzzled, for a moment.
She then responded "Yes, black people get sunburned. Just because you haven't seen it, doesn't mean it doesn't happen."
And she was right, I just assumed, in all my whiteness, that black people didn't sunburn. She still makes fun of me for this. I am in my 30's..
Someone was placing an order once at my family’s restaurant, and they had asked me for a side of French fries without the potatoes. I assumed she was joking, so I laughed...she wasn’t joking. She got offended and left the restaurant
Do you think they're a little old to be lesbians?
When a lesbian reaches the age of 28, she lays her clutch of eggs. Her optic gland then starts secreting a hormone which triggers an intense mothering instinct. For the next year, she doesn't do anything except protect her eggs. She doesn't eat or sleep during this period, so her body slowly deteriorates. Finally, after a year, the eggs hatch, and out swim hundreds of baby lesbians. Then the mother lesbian dies.
The Scene: Meeting some new people in a college class.
I introduce myself, "Hi, I'm LoveIsLegallyBlind."
New classmate: "Don't you mean DifferentNameThatSoundsALittleLikeMine?"
Me: "No..."
He thinks it's time to double down. "Are you sure? Why not?"
Me: "Because that's not what my parents named me..."
Like what? Who corrects someone on their own name? I have a somewhat unusual name. People misspell it or mispronounce it all the time, but this was special.
I was asked how far the luggage plane usually flies behind the passenger plane. The person who asked me went to an Ivy league medical school.
While working as a butcher, I showed a deli clerk how to break down a whole chicken into pieces. I show her, "two breasts, two wings, two legs, two thighs." she looks at me and asks, "which part does the turkey come from?"
If it was possible to even land a plane on Japan because it's so small.
Because, you know, maps are a 1:1 description of the world
"What time is the 3 O'clock parade?"
I worked at Disney World. This is the #1 most common question you'll get asked as a Cast Member in the Magic Kingdom.
First day working a tech support job, I answer a phone call from a woman whose laptop won't turn on. She's at the airport trying to get some work done and is very frustrated because she had been working for several hours during a layover and the laptop suddenly shut off. I asked her if she had the laptop plugged in when it shut off, or if she was just running it on the battery. "It can be plugged in? I thought it was supposed to be wireless."
I honestly thought I was being pranked because I was the new guy. After a lengthy pause to decide if this was a serious call, I advised her to try plugging it in. Laptop turned on, she was amazed that it didn't just recharge itself when she wasn't using it.
Why did she bring a charger if she didn't think it needs charging? Doesn't add up.
“Do we have the ability to open digital files?”
This is the guy who would print PDFs from our server then scan the print to his email so he could save them to his desktop...
In high school, we were warming up before a baseball game one evening and some really ominous ,dark clouds started rolling in. One of my teammates very seriously asked “Is that a storm or is that just night coming?”. I will never forget that.
Not me, but our safari guide in South Africa said he once heard a woman ask her husband, “Honey, is that the same moon we see in Texas?”
For context, I work in a phone shop.
Customer: What is this? (Hands me his bill)
Me: This is your bill.
Customer: But I already paid it.
Me: Well then, don't worry about it.
Customer: No, I mean I paid it last month.
Me: Oh, this is just your second bill then.
Customer: BUT I ALREADY PAID IT!
Me: Last month's bill, yes. This is your next bill.
Customer: YOU MEAN THEY KEEP SENDING THESE EVERY MONTH?
Me: ... yes ... that's what a phone contract is. You signed a contract for 2 years didn't you?
Customer: Yeah.
Me: So you will get a bill each month for 2 years then.
Customer: WHAT A RIP OFF!!!
He legit thought he would only get a single $90 bill for his brand new iPhone over the entire 2 years of his contract...
Might be first time paying own bills, imagine when he finds out electricity and water aren’t free
Was a Mac Genius for 7 years, customer asked if her iPod would get heavier as she puts more music on it.
What day of the week is good Friday on?
Do you mean what date?
No, what day of the week. It was on a Thursday last year.
No
I work in a toll booth and was working on the westbound side. A lady drove up to my booth really mad, which is par for the course but I digress. She told me that every day she takes this route home from work, and every. single. day. the sun is directly in her eyes... Well of course, shes driving westbound at 6 pm. When I mentioned this she brushed it off and asked "well can't you change the direction of the road or at least put a cover over it?! I can't be the only person who is bothered by this!"
I am an identical twin and one time a girl asked me if we get each other confused.
Legitimate question regarding photos. Who knows with baby photos?
My grandpa left my place, immediately called me to ask if he left his cell phone at my place.
"How are you talking to me?"
".........bye."
It’s cute, he gets a pass, like looking for your glasses that’s on your head or face already
I live in a high-altitude town in the mountains. Every week, I hear this question:
"At what elevation do the deer turn into elk?"
WHY DO SO MANY PEOPLE THINK THIS!? WHY!?
I was at my cottage looking at the stars at night with a friend and she turned to me and asked: "are there countries in the sky?" I didn't know what she meant so I asked her to explain and then she said: "Well, are there any countries in the world that are just kind of, in the sky?" I was so confused that I just sat there in silence but eventually she says "I mean, is there land on the earth in the sky where people live that are countries?" At that point I just gave up and said "no" and she replied "oh, okay" so reassuringly
I had a classmate from the big city. At a school trip we went outside at night. She was surprised to see stars. She thought it was special effects in movies and ig pictures to make it look less dark.
Work in retail. Guy comes in. He looks pretty average. Has a nice suit, nice glasses, well kept hair. Above average I guess.
He's looking for a particular stock pot that the store carries and I bring him over to where they're kept.
He begins to stare at the box, a deeply troubled look emerges slowly on his face as he places his hand on his chin.
The box art depicts the pot in use, with some photoshopped water and a corn cob bobbing out of it (this is relevant, trust me).
After about 10 seconds of him staring perplexedly at the box I ask, "Anything else I can help you with?"
He replies, sounding confused, "So... this thing can only be used to cook corn?"
I stared blankly at him. Was he fucking with me? His vexed demeanor told me no, he was indeed concerned about the product's potentially limited use.
I honestly have no idea how long I was speechless. It felt like minutes. I couldn't speak. No one is that dumb, right?
He eventually says, "It's ok, I'll figure it out from here", and continued to gaze at the box in hopes of gleaning the answers to the troubles he had encountered.
A girlfriend of a friend of mine asked. “ I wonder what it was like before color”. This chick thought the WORLD WAS BLACK AND WHITE not film.
Working for a rafting company I’m asked far too often at the end of the float if we are back at the start. Rivers don’t flow in god damn circles!
There ARE rafting rides in amusement parks where people are taken around in almost a complete circle, with MASSIVE water pumps to recirculate the water and belts to take the raft back uphill.
My current boss asked me to "make the pages smaller" so she can see all of them" she had excel zoomed in to 200% and thought I was just sending things in font 46. This person has been in her position for 12 years. Ugh.
My old boss got upset with me, as the spreadsheet I sent him didn't have all the data on it that I had assured him it had. I then had to teach him to scroll down. He did the same thing a week later
I worked in a pizza restaurant when I was 16. They had a pizza they called a UFO pizza. It was just another slab of dough on top of a regular pizza, and it made it look like an orb, hence the name.
One day a guy that worked there was writing down a telephone order, turns around and says "hey guys, how do you spell UFO??" The owner looked mortified and just repeated "youuu eefff ohhh!!". He stared back in silence for a few moments before it hit him.
My twenty-something daughter asked why we never see squirrel eggs. Us parent types responded that's because squirrels are mammals and don't lay eggs like birds do. To which she responded, then show me an infant squirrel / "breastfeeding" squirrel.
This led to a conversation that was much longer than needed to be.
Not just that, the echidna doesn't exactly breast feed as it has a milk patch and not nipples. The infant just slurps the puddle.
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My partner's son asked me why the egg in the box looked different to normal. I said it was a duck egg. He said "Yeah, ok. Ducks don't lay eggs.". I said, "Yes they do. How do you think you get ducklings?", "I thought they just popped out like other mammals", "Ducks are birds", "Shut up. Why can't they fly then?", "Ducks can fly...", "I've never seen one flying", "Never the less, ducks can fly". He's almost 20.
Oh, wow. I thought you were going to say, he was 2…
Load More Replies... Not a wrong question, and easily found! https://www.nationalgeographic.com/animals/article/viral-squirrel-photo-japan-mammary-glands-animals-news?cmpid=int_org=ngp::int_mc=website::int_src=ngp::int_cmp=amp::int_add=amp_readtherest
I had a cat once who suddenly developed very large breasts. Vet said it wasn't something he saw every day, but nothing to be concerned about.
Load More Replies... Have fun explaining the platypus or spiny anteater (now called an "echidna" because it's not related to anteaters). They are mammals which milk-feed their babies (they don't exactly have breasts), and yet lay eggs. If you haven't seen a spiny anteater yourself, do! They're amazing creatures. They look like hedgehogs that breathe through a kazoo. And they use electrical impulses to find insects.
Yeah, when you complain about your own daughter being ignorant, you should realize it reflects poorly on you...
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Echidnas and platypuses are egg laying mammals but neither have big bushy tails.
BTW - Squirrels feed their babies milk every two to four hours until they are weaned onto solid foods and are ready to leave the nest
My mum thought seagulls didn't hatch from eggs but were live born... tbf she had dementia but she was really adamant.
Your daughter is an idiot who didn't pay attention in school, and you should be humiliated. There are only 2 mammals that lay eggs and neither species lives here.
Evidently they never had the "coming of age" talk with their daughter.
Perhaps the parents should have had that long convo with the daughter when she was much younger, or they could have just googled "breast feeding squirrel," I'm sure there are images and videos a plenty!
A favorite story: I was an educator at the zoo. When animals die, sometimes parts (pelts, etc) are kept for educational purposes. They’re called bio facts and keeping some is required in order to fulfill the educational part of being accredited. We had an elephant ear preserved from a still birth many years ago.I was present when one of our teen volunteers had it out for the public to see & touch. One very well dressed & seemingly well educated woman watched as her kids marveled at it, She then asked the teen how often elephants shed their ears.She thought we just picked it up off the ground like a shed antler. He stared, then stumbled, then looked at me in panic. I took over & she and I had a discussion about mammals & whether or not mammals normally shed body parts. Took a while, but the lightbulb eventually turned on.
Sure asking about eggs was wide of of the mark, but asking about breastfeeding is fair enough since squirrels lactate.
Marsupials also give birth, which are not placental mammals.
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A woman asked me if gorilla glue was made from real gorillas. I laughed at first, but she was serious. She told me she was vegan and wouldn't use the product if it was made with real gorillas.
Had a lady insist that "the lights outside that you don't plug in and don't have batteries" were not solar lights. She got furious when she asked two more employees who both said solar lights. She then described the solar panel on top of those decorative garden lights, and demanded a manager. Who also told her solar lights.
Yes- she meant solar lights. She came back later, clearly embarrassed and bought some.
Literally had a guy ask me yesterday “if I hit the cash back button, does the money come out of my account?”
Dude was like 30 and he thought cash back was just...free money I guess?
People waking other people and asking if they were sleeping. Widespread stupidity this.
Coworker woke me up at 8 this morning to tell me to enjoy my day off. >.<
I have a buzz cut. A guy at work recently asked, dead seriously “Do you cut your hair? Or does it only grow that long?”
In 8th grade science class, the girl sitting next to me asked - “How do we get into outer space if we have to break through the Earth’s crust?”
She thought we lived in the mantle.
When I was in college and my flatmate saw my room he asked me in all seriousness: "why is your toilet so clean?".
I work at a fast food restaurant.
"How much degreaser I have to put in the oil before it turns back into water?"
I've said this one before but I'm a submarine pilot and I give tours of coral reef. This gets asked far more than I expected or ever wanted but when we're sitting 100ft down below in nothing but sand, people have asked, "is that snow?"
Not asked, but in high school show choir, we took a trip to Toronto (from the US) for a competition. One girl thought Toronto was in Florida, and only packed bathing suits, shorts, and crop tops.
The guy ahead of me asked the Chipotle employee, “What’s ‘lay-tuck-ee’?”
It was lettuce. He asked what lettuce was.
I used to work at a sub shop and a lady asked me “how much bigger is the 8 inch compared to the 6 inch” I replied with “2 inches”. That was that...
don't make an adult joke don't make an adult joke don't make an adult joke...
“How did we build the mountains?” - my brothers fiance, while we drove through the rockies
Point to the moon on this map, she was happy she won the argument as I could in fact not point at the moon on a map of the earth.
Of course you can't point at the moon on a map of the Earth, because there is no moon at daytime! Duh!
I worked at a cafe with white mugs. Crisp white china mugs.
A woman ordered a dark roast coffee and a green tea to stay and then when I slid them to her she looked st them and then back at me with big Bambi eyes
“Which is which?”
"If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee." (Abraham Lincoln)
When I was visiting America a 24 year old girl asked me if Australians speak English.
Had a coworker one time tell our British supervisor how amazed she was at how well he spoke English from just living here in the US 1 year
The homecoming queen at my high school asked me if the Native Americans really existed.
I hope you told her that the colonists never existed either, and she came into existence by apparition.
While eating a chicken pot pie, my friend asked me why they didn't make pies with fruit in them instead.
....like regular ass pies.
In my driver’s ed class the instructor was discussing cardinal directions.
He asked a girl on the front row what direction her house was from here.
She points out the window and he goes “so, West?”
She responds “well, it’s my East because I’m facing you. “
This is a common brain glitch. My husband has left, and other-left. It's just the way his brain works. And, no, we do not let him have the compass.
Student, over the phone: "I can't come to the learning center today. Can you print me some things for me to work on at home?"
Me: "How are you getting them if you can't come in today?"
Student: *hangs up*
My roommate asked me if Radcliffe College at Harvard was named after Daniel Radcliffe.
A girl at school asked me if Wisconsin was the capital of Texas.... she was confused 'cause she moved to Tx from Wi..... I said "no it's Austin and Wisconsin is a state not a city".... she said "Oooohhhh, thanks!"
We were highschool freshmen, how? Just how? You lived there girl
I live in Texas an I had jury duty and a few of us were chatting while waiting forever to either be called or be sent home. There was this one girl in our little talking group that was around 18-21 years old and we all got to talking about George W. bush who had just been re-elected (yea it was a while ago). This poor girl could not understand that just because he is president doesn’t mean he is mayor of every city in the us. Can you imagine what the workload of that would be? Mayor of every city in America. At the end of the day as we were all leaving she offered me adderall if I wanted some. Like it’s candy or something. Still in the courthouse walking to the doors to leave.
My wife and I were watching The Martian and she looked over at me and asked if it was based on a true story
That's a real compliment to Matt Damon and the producers of that movie. I wonder what she thinks of Gone With the Wind?
Not me, but it’s such a dumb question I have to share. A classmate of mine in my sophomore year of High School asked my Biology teacher something so dumb it’s stuck with me for 10 years. She was clearly arguing with someone in the back of the class and my teacher finally stopped them and asked what was going on. Now this girl was known to everyone as a bit of a dunce, but this was astounding. She looked at my teacher with this smug-ass smirk and said “Can you settle this argument for us since you’re a science teacher? A biologist doesn’t study biology, right? These guys keep trying to tell me they do.” My teacher went wide-eyed and had to leave the room for what felt like 5 minutes.
This girl already said a lot of really stupid stuff in the 6 years I went to school with her, but this was the one that always stuck out to me.
I understand her question and that she couldn't articulate it. She's thinking they had to study biology to become biologists, and then theIr jobs were to apply what they had learned. She probably wasn't stupid but had executive function issues.
When I was working in second level IT support, I reset a user's password to Start123. I told her, "Your temporary password is Start123 with a capital S."
I was asked, "How do you make a capital S?"
I love teaching new computer users. I wish I could have her in a class. In one of my classes, students were so afraid of "pop ups," that we spent 90 minutes practicing opening and closing various windows and menus.
This one guy asked me how to "un-off" something.
His brain knew he wanted to communicate something but couldn't quite think of the word.
It's not so much what she said. But when adult me was having a conversation with my adult sister, it came about the island we grew up on. And now both of us in the "big" city, what I've learned and appreciated from our "islandly lifestyle"... She had no clue what I was on about, in all her life she had never registered that we grew up on a island! Small as it was.
She's the most intelligent person I know. Very academic. But she never realised, no matter where we looked we could see water. Granted, there was a bridge to mainland... But still.
"Do jews wear that hat because they're hiding bald spots"
And Moses chiselled on an 11th commandment, "Thou shalt not have shiney heads".
I worked in a sub shop for many years. I had a guy look at me and ask me how big a 12 inch sub is. I just looked at him and said 12 inches. He just nodded and said ok like I had just imparted some new and secret knowledge on him.
Maybe he wanted to see the bread? I have no clue how big is 12 inches, even if its given in centimeters its just hard to imagine or there is nothing to compare...
My wife asked me why the lightning was red. I replied, “honey, those are fireworks.”
hands student exam
"Which questions do I answer?"
"Does Windows 7-sticker on my computer slow it down if I have Windows 10?"
I once asked someone to look to the left of something on her screen. She asked "My left or your left?"
I am an instructor in Oklahoma. I take for granted that when I say “left” my next words will be “the other left”.
My daughter asked me a couple days ago if a duck is a bird. She’s 13.
“The USA is in California right?”
I'm working the IT help desk.
"Do you guys have any of those wireless internet cables??"
Blank stare ensued while I waited for her to understand the request... Then I said it's already plugged in...
When scheduling an appointment for someone I asked if they could come at noon. They asked me what time noon was.
Well, English not being my first language, I learned that pretty late in my life. I do have a pretty unremarkable accent so sometimes people think I am just stupid (like asking when is "Thursday" in the week). Maybe it was the case here too, who kows
"Tragiccity, how am I supposed to fry this egg? Every time I crack one into the fryer, it just turns into ribbons!"
This was at my first kitchen job (and obviously this guy's, too).
Dumbest question I've ever heard in my life: "How can you believe in Covid?".... Well, see, I don't believe in it. I KNOW IT EXISTS. Like rocks. Nobody asks if I believe in rocks.
This reminds me of a pun I saw, something like; 'light travels faster than sound, so some people seem pretty bright until they speak
Not my story but we had a new forklift driver start. The supervisor comes into the office looking struck dumb. Tells me that he was having a conversation with the new guy about how windy it was. New guy says yeh that's weird there are hardly any trees around. Supervisor says why does that matter? New guy says it's the swaying of the leaves that creates wind.
He must have watched "Arthur" growing up. Something I've always remembered is that DW, Arthur's sister, said that's how wind formed. I knew it was dumb when I was a child.
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I once had to explain to my Human Resources manager that the USA and England were at war with each other, twice. She is American, born and raised in Mississippi, and didn't know this. I asked her why she thinks we celebrate the 4th of July and she said "I thought it was a celebration of the USA, with fireworks". Well, technically she wasn't wrong about that part. I would think someone born and raised in the USA, with a college degree, would know this.
Everyone born and raised in USA with a college degree should know this! Sadly there are those who do not.
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Had a classmate in 8th grade tell me that North is always in front of you.
At the beginning of a year in University, on a class trip riding camels through the desert with the Bedouin. Professor is on the lead camel, and asks the Bedouin if they "milk the male camels as well as th females? Because it seems to him that they could get more milk that way". 🤦🤦
There was once a ridiculous headline that a B17 bomber had been found on the moon and a co-worker believed it. I told him that it was ludicrous for so many reasons and they had just pasted a picture of the plane onto the moon. He was incredulous and asked, "How would they get that picture to the moon?"
I once tried to explain the concept of "miles per hour" to a 30yo friend. She was unable to grasp the relationship between velocity, distance, and time no matter how many different ways I tried to explain. I finally gave up.
I was once in the cafe in a large bookstore around the holidays. I ordered a hot chocolate to sit and drink while reading. The barista asked me if I wanted a gift receipt.
Poor barista was probably on autopilot. I've done a fair amount of call center work, and have been known to answer my home phone with my work greeting. There was also the time I was going through McDonald's drive-through, told the nice employee what I wanted and added "this is to go". We both laughed at that one.
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Happened to my bf who went to HS with me. A girl in his history class was shocked to learn that America was a democracy. Her words were "We are not communism?" WUT?
At a previous job, I once asked how long I needed to wait before sending the 'ten day letter'. I felt a complete twit. On the plus side, did have a girl at the same job ask me how they turned trains round at the end of the line if not by a huge crane... bless her! :D
Ngl, I'd have done that first one. Is it ten calendar days or ten business/working days?
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A third year university student who wanted to become a law and policy maker pointed to the moon (it was still daylight, early summer evening in North America for context) and asked if it was the moon or sun. Friend responded that it was the moon. Student replied oh thanks, I am never sure which is which. English is her only language
I used to do remedial teaching at a US high school. I think one of the saddest realizations of the quality of education there was when I was helping a girl learn about circumnavigation and why it was such a risk and an adventure (she didn't understand that we didn't always know where everywhere in the world was). But she was really baffled by having to take barrels and barrels of water onto the ships. "Like, that's so dumb when they're literally surrounded by water." I had to explain that 1/ sea is saltwater and 2/you cannot drink saltwater or you will die pretty quickly. She didn't understand about scurvy. She didn't understand any of it. Fortunately, after two hours with me, she understood all of it, so she was more than capable, but she had had such rubbish teaching, that it meant nothing to her.
Pretty sure nost kids don't know about scurvy.
Load More Replies... My sister when she was around 15-16 thought that if a kid under the age of 2 gets their finger cut off it will grow back. Why the cut off is at 2 years old I just don’t know. This is the same girl who tried to wax her bikini area with hot candlewax being dripped on it then cooled for a few minutes and then ripped off. She still has scars from the burning wax around her crotch. This was in the 90’s.
Your poor sister! That sounds so painful! I wish she'd had someone to talk to about it or help her, but maybe bikini waxing was too taboo.
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I could do one of these lists by myself, having worked in a range of IT positions. The most aggravating was the woman who came into our PC store to ask about video cards for her son. The guy she asked pointed me out. She came up and said "I asked that guy who was the video card expert, but he didn't seem to know, because he pointed at you." I took a moment before saying "I'm the expert". Sexist cow.
Coworker's neutered male cat had chronic urinary tract blockages, and the vet performed a surgery commonly done in such cases. Unfortunately (and not particularly accurately) the vet described this procedure as "turning him into a girl." Coworker asked me, in all seriousness, if she would have to get him spayed. We both taught college.
I knew a girl in probably 7th grade - I was in 8th - who insisted that she’d never learned the months of the year in order. I didn’t believe her and I was quite frankly insulted that she thought I would. She told me she had been sick from school that week or whatever.
Mine. Texas again. I was admitting a patient into Day Surgery. After 10 years in Texas most people couldn't place my accent and so would ask me where I'm from. The patient asked me: Patient: Where are you from? Me: Canada Patient: What part? Me: Toronto. Patient: Well I have a friend in Calgary by the name of "X". Do you know him? Me: Somewhat of a silence. Then....Sir, you know where Montana is right? Patient: Yes. Me: Do you know where Buffalo NY is? Patient: Yes. Me: Calgary is directly north of Montana and Toronto is directly north of Buffalo. Patient: Oh. So I guess you don't know him then. Me: No. I don't. (In my head 🙄)
Got into an argument with a personal trainer once because he said a pond if muscle weighs more than a pound of fat. He never did catch on. GEEZ
My Boss, was asked, (more than once) "If his Boy-Girl twins were Identical?"
Asked a new employee how they spelled their name. After he spelled it I said, “oh it’s phonetic”, he said, “no it’s German”. My eyes darted around the room quickly to see if anyone else had heard this exchange and my eye caught my friend in the sales office smirking and trying not to laugh.
Funny, yes. Sad, yes. It really is difficult to find out how so many people know so little.
I once had a brain fart when I found out a local police officer only has one leg. “But he cycles?” 🤣 for context, there was some sort of protest going on and the people were on a roof or something. I asked my boss if the officer would be going and he said doubtful since he only has one leg.
Dumbest question I've ever heard in my life: "How can you believe in Covid?".... Well, see, I don't believe in it. I KNOW IT EXISTS. Like rocks. Nobody asks if I believe in rocks.
This reminds me of a pun I saw, something like; 'light travels faster than sound, so some people seem pretty bright until they speak
Not my story but we had a new forklift driver start. The supervisor comes into the office looking struck dumb. Tells me that he was having a conversation with the new guy about how windy it was. New guy says yeh that's weird there are hardly any trees around. Supervisor says why does that matter? New guy says it's the swaying of the leaves that creates wind.
He must have watched "Arthur" growing up. Something I've always remembered is that DW, Arthur's sister, said that's how wind formed. I knew it was dumb when I was a child.
Load More Replies... I once had to explain to my Human Resources manager that the USA and England were at war with each other, twice. She is American, born and raised in Mississippi, and didn't know this. I asked her why she thinks we celebrate the 4th of July and she said "I thought it was a celebration of the USA, with fireworks". Well, technically she wasn't wrong about that part. I would think someone born and raised in the USA, with a college degree, would know this.
Everyone born and raised in USA with a college degree should know this! Sadly there are those who do not.
Load More Replies... Had a classmate in 8th grade tell me that North is always in front of you.
At the beginning of a year in University, on a class trip riding camels through the desert with the Bedouin. Professor is on the lead camel, and asks the Bedouin if they "milk the male camels as well as th females? Because it seems to him that they could get more milk that way". 🤦🤦
There was once a ridiculous headline that a B17 bomber had been found on the moon and a co-worker believed it. I told him that it was ludicrous for so many reasons and they had just pasted a picture of the plane onto the moon. He was incredulous and asked, "How would they get that picture to the moon?"
I once tried to explain the concept of "miles per hour" to a 30yo friend. She was unable to grasp the relationship between velocity, distance, and time no matter how many different ways I tried to explain. I finally gave up.
I was once in the cafe in a large bookstore around the holidays. I ordered a hot chocolate to sit and drink while reading. The barista asked me if I wanted a gift receipt.
Poor barista was probably on autopilot. I've done a fair amount of call center work, and have been known to answer my home phone with my work greeting. There was also the time I was going through McDonald's drive-through, told the nice employee what I wanted and added "this is to go". We both laughed at that one.
Load More Replies... Happened to my bf who went to HS with me. A girl in his history class was shocked to learn that America was a democracy. Her words were "We are not communism?" WUT?
At a previous job, I once asked how long I needed to wait before sending the 'ten day letter'. I felt a complete twit. On the plus side, did have a girl at the same job ask me how they turned trains round at the end of the line if not by a huge crane... bless her! :D
Ngl, I'd have done that first one. Is it ten calendar days or ten business/working days?
Load More Replies... A third year university student who wanted to become a law and policy maker pointed to the moon (it was still daylight, early summer evening in North America for context) and asked if it was the moon or sun. Friend responded that it was the moon. Student replied oh thanks, I am never sure which is which. English is her only language
I used to do remedial teaching at a US high school. I think one of the saddest realizations of the quality of education there was when I was helping a girl learn about circumnavigation and why it was such a risk and an adventure (she didn't understand that we didn't always know where everywhere in the world was). But she was really baffled by having to take barrels and barrels of water onto the ships. "Like, that's so dumb when they're literally surrounded by water." I had to explain that 1/ sea is saltwater and 2/you cannot drink saltwater or you will die pretty quickly. She didn't understand about scurvy. She didn't understand any of it. Fortunately, after two hours with me, she understood all of it, so she was more than capable, but she had had such rubbish teaching, that it meant nothing to her.
Pretty sure nost kids don't know about scurvy.
Load More Replies... My sister when she was around 15-16 thought that if a kid under the age of 2 gets their finger cut off it will grow back. Why the cut off is at 2 years old I just don’t know. This is the same girl who tried to wax her bikini area with hot candlewax being dripped on it then cooled for a few minutes and then ripped off. She still has scars from the burning wax around her crotch. This was in the 90’s.
Your poor sister! That sounds so painful! I wish she'd had someone to talk to about it or help her, but maybe bikini waxing was too taboo.
Load More Replies... I could do one of these lists by myself, having worked in a range of IT positions. The most aggravating was the woman who came into our PC store to ask about video cards for her son. The guy she asked pointed me out. She came up and said "I asked that guy who was the video card expert, but he didn't seem to know, because he pointed at you." I took a moment before saying "I'm the expert". Sexist cow.
Coworker's neutered male cat had chronic urinary tract blockages, and the vet performed a surgery commonly done in such cases. Unfortunately (and not particularly accurately) the vet described this procedure as "turning him into a girl." Coworker asked me, in all seriousness, if she would have to get him spayed. We both taught college.
I knew a girl in probably 7th grade - I was in 8th - who insisted that she’d never learned the months of the year in order. I didn’t believe her and I was quite frankly insulted that she thought I would. She told me she had been sick from school that week or whatever.
Mine. Texas again. I was admitting a patient into Day Surgery. After 10 years in Texas most people couldn't place my accent and so would ask me where I'm from. The patient asked me: Patient: Where are you from? Me: Canada Patient: What part? Me: Toronto. Patient: Well I have a friend in Calgary by the name of "X". Do you know him? Me: Somewhat of a silence. Then....Sir, you know where Montana is right? Patient: Yes. Me: Do you know where Buffalo NY is? Patient: Yes. Me: Calgary is directly north of Montana and Toronto is directly north of Buffalo. Patient: Oh. So I guess you don't know him then. Me: No. I don't. (In my head 🙄)
Got into an argument with a personal trainer once because he said a pond if muscle weighs more than a pound of fat. He never did catch on. GEEZ
My Boss, was asked, (more than once) "If his Boy-Girl twins were Identical?"
Asked a new employee how they spelled their name. After he spelled it I said, “oh it’s phonetic”, he said, “no it’s German”. My eyes darted around the room quickly to see if anyone else had heard this exchange and my eye caught my friend in the sales office smirking and trying not to laugh.
Funny, yes. Sad, yes. It really is difficult to find out how so many people know so little.
I once had a brain fart when I found out a local police officer only has one leg. “But he cycles?” 🤣 for context, there was some sort of protest going on and the people were on a roof or something. I asked my boss if the officer would be going and he said doubtful since he only has one leg.
