ADVERTISEMENT

After Jamina Bone gave birth to her second child, she was hit with strong postpartum depression, also known as PPD.

"It went from a very educational approach where I was constantly looking up the 'best' way to handle every aspect to being unable to move," Bone told Bored Panda. "I used to plan activities, limit screen time, and make every opportunity a learning moment. I was a Special Educator before having kids so this was everything I wanted and felt equipped to do it all. When PPD hit, it was like wading through mud or even quicksand and still being expected to do all the things."

She felt broken, unworthy of being a mom for her perfect little beings, and selfish for wanting to get away. "I kept the negative thoughts in my head and often imagined terrifying things from hurting myself to the death of my baby. Being isolated the first several months and lack of sleep were definite factors that played into depression but also not dealing with the sudden death of my mother in law to cancer when I was pregnant. I didn’t realize these were risk factors." The woman didn't realize she was depressed. She just thought she was failing.

Over time, however, Bone has managed to get out of the rut. Now, the mom-of-two is encouraging "imPERFECT moms" to ditch social norms and embrace their true badass selves. One of the ways she's doing it is illustrating everyday situations. Through her pictures, Bone reminds people that a woman can have doubts and still be a good mom. She can feel disappointed and still be a good mom. Most importantly, she can be herself, forget the pseudoperfect happy-go-lucky mentality and still be a good mom.

More info: mommingwithtruth.comInstagram

"We moms are bombarded with the 'proper' ways to parent from Google to Pinterest and perfection-blasted on social media," Bone said. "We share baby milestones with our friends and loved ones, but forget to discuss the difficulties of parenthood. Well, let's be real, motherhood. The mother is expected to give 100% of her body, most of her time, and the majority of her mental energy planning for the what-ifs and all the needs. Community is lost, support is seen as weakness, and if you're depressed, you're seen as ungrateful and selfish."

Bone thinks we are a society that lifts the 'selfless' behavior of mothers up on pedestals while condemning the ones who are crying for help. We don't realize that we confuse selfless with self-hate or self-contempt. "My mother was selfless, but I would also say she hated her body, felt unlovable, and rattled with guilt for not seeing abuses that happened to her children," Bone explained. "She used so many opportunities to punish herself from not dating, not taking care of her body, to even shaming herself in front of us."

#3

Still-A-Good-Mom-Illustrations-Jamina-Bone

mommingwithtruth Report

Add photo comments
POST
chachameert avatar
Charlotte Sandoval
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This one needs to be higher. Taking meds is so stigmatized for no reason. Take care of yourself and you take care of your kids.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT

So, like most adults with children of their own, Bone finds herself trying to correct the wrongs. "Many of us built our adult foundation upon trauma without realizing the need for internal healing. Weirdly enough, depression was my unwanted 'gift' that forced me and my family to sort through every aspect in our lives that wasn't working in our favor. We set boundaries, went to therapy, talked to our doctors, and closed the door on every external expectation for our family."

The down-to-earth mom describes her parenting as 'good enough' and says she is still a work in progress. "I am healing myself and trying to break the cycles of abuse and neglect my husband and I collectively had in our childhoods. I zone in on my own set of values of what I am good at. My kids feel safe and held and seen and heard, and as long as I am moving forward in my own parenting journey, I am good enough," Bone explained, adding that she and her husband communicate more now than ever which also helps share the burdens and joys of parenting.

#5

Still-A-Good-Mom-Illustrations-Jamina-Bone

mommingwithtruth Report

Add photo comments
POST
xianjaguar avatar
XianJaguar
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yelling at your kid is not always bad! Good parents yell at kids to discipline them. Not everyone is as calm as a cucumber. Good mom!

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

Bone said that one of the most important steps towards overcoming the overwhelming feeling of guilt is celebrating your victories. "I developed a simple online quiz to help mamas find what they are good at. This quiz leads you to know the values that are most important to you so you can learn to turn off the feeling of guilt when you see a Karen posting her gluten-free, no-sugar-added snacks with her home-cooked meals cut out in cute shapes that her kids never complain about after having organized homeschool activities, teaching writing to her 1-year-old because it's never too soon to learn writing." Knowing that Karen has different strengths and values than you is key.

ADVERTISEMENT

"I'm also creating a mental health makeover for exhausted mamas coming out soon! I am really proud of this one and even received input from a psychologist specializing in maternal mental health to be sure I was helping and not hindering growth. To sit in the lies fake mom guilt leads us to believe, we often become friends with those voices and we don't know who we are without them. We begin to believe the lies over the truth and over time we forget who we are or who we are becoming. Knowing where to start in order to move past these limited beliefs can be debilitating." This makeover, called "Enough" essentially takes mamas through 5 weeks of progress and habit building based around healthier thoughts, taking control of triggers, and finding a balance that is doable.

#7

Still-A-Good-Mom-Illustrations-Jamina-Bone

mommingwithtruth Report

Add photo comments
POST
iponodesigns avatar
Sarah Blanche Brinsfield
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Laundry can wait but babies grow up and need our cuddles now. I wish (for a day) that my bigs were little and that they would seek me out like they once did.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
#10

Still-A-Good-Mom-Illustrations-Jamina-Bone

mommingwithtruth Report

Add photo comments
POST
xianjaguar avatar
XianJaguar
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hey, this is REALITY. This is what we had for most of the summer. It has nothing to do with being a bad parent. In fact, frugal parents are usually quite GOOD parents!!

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#11

Still-A-Good-Mom-Illustrations-Jamina-Bone

mommingwithtruth Report

Add photo comments
POST
sluclakito avatar
LittleMissLotus
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The trolls on this post need to chill. It's not like this person is saying you should feed your kid nothing but fast food, and one hamburger isn't going to kill them...

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#12

Still-A-Good-Mom-Illustrations-Jamina-Bone

mommingwithtruth Report

Add photo comments
POST
#13

Still-A-Good-Mom-Illustrations-Jamina-Bone

mommingwithtruth Report

Add photo comments
POST
jboneillustrations avatar
Jamina Bone
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Everything can change after having a child. Often mamas begin to hate their body. Learning to love the imPERFECTIONS and heal is important. You are not a bad mom if you don’t lose the weight, nor are you a bad mom for loving your body around your child.

pevince avatar
Patrick Vincent
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would say "still a good Mom" with tattoos, and possibly others seeing issues with body image...neither true, still a good Mom....

charlottethaxton avatar
annarmosley avatar
Well, I Tried
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The mother in this image is shown with tattoos and people often associate that with well people who aren't fit to be parents. Obviously this stereotype is often not true.

Load More Replies...
serialkitten avatar
roxana-djh avatar
Just another bot
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can interpret this one in two ways, she is either enjoying some me time away from the kids or she has maybe put on a bit of baby weight and still feels good in her own body. Anyway, that's a happy mamma :)

Load More Replies...
inservioletum avatar
Nothanks L. Walk
Community Member
3 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

lingerie and a HAT? did good mom have a few tii many martooni's with lunch?

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#15

Still-A-Good-Mom-Illustrations-Jamina-Bone

mommingwithtruth Report

Add photo comments
POST
xianjaguar avatar
XianJaguar
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm kinda shocked at half of these comics. Why in the world would anyone consider a mom "not good" for not indulging their kid in every little thing they want? Of COURSE you are a still a good mom if you tell your kid "no" to going to the playground! Kids need to learn that they do not automatically get everything they scream for.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#17

Still-A-Good-Mom-Illustrations-Jamina-Bone

mommingwithtruth Report

Add photo comments
POST
ac_txva avatar
Tiger Pearl
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is one of the things I wrestle with. I grew up with lots of animals and pets, but do not have one now. My kids want one so bad, and I know that having a pet brings so much good. But Im so busy and am already weighed down with so many responsibilities. I can’t take on another one. I love animals, which is why I am not getting a pet. They deserve more then what my family can give right now.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
See Also on Bored Panda
#21

Still-A-Good-Mom-Illustrations-Jamina-Bone

mommingwithtruth Report

Add photo comments
POST
meyowmix avatar
Colin L
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Mom's sunny expectations are exhausting. Better to be true to yourself than, and shine in your own ways.

View more commentsArrow down menu
#22

Still-A-Good-Mom-Illustrations-Jamina-Bone

mommingwithtruth Report

Add photo comments
POST
avalightsabre avatar
Ava-cado
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh sibling fights, a true challenge to anyone's parenting style.

View more commentsArrow down menu
#23

Still-A-Good-Mom-Illustrations-Jamina-Bone

mommingwithtruth Report

Add photo comments
POST
amandak27 avatar
Red Hair Blue Soul
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

THIS! I hate cooking! My kid is okay on my husband's cooking and will grow up just fine!!

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#28

Still-A-Good-Mom-Illustrations-Jamina-Bone

mommingwithtruth Report

Add photo comments
POST
roxana-djh avatar
Just another bot
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When the child doesn't want to listen to you. Like when I start singing sometimes, my 4 year old will straight away ask me to stop lol

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
See Also on Bored Panda
#30

Still-A-Good-Mom-Illustrations-Jamina-Bone

mommingwithtruth Report

Add photo comments
POST
meyowmix avatar
Colin L
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What, reproduction doesn't magically grant you all the skills of a plumber, master chef, MD, and the endurance of a marathon runner? You must be human like the rest of us!

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu