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This Brutally Honest Post About Stay-At-Home Moms Was “Liked” Over 640,000 Times, But It Deserves More
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Parenting5 years ago

This Brutally Honest Post About Stay-At-Home Moms Was “Liked” Over 640,000 Times, But It Deserves More

Tired of constantly hearing the phrase “but what do you do all day?”, Florida-based tattoo artist Ryshell Castleberry decided to write a tribute to all stay-at-home mothers and housewives via Facebook. It exploded. Her powerful post has been liked over 640,000 times and shared by more than 300,000 people. It may seem like a lot, but that’s not enough. It has to be read by everyone to really appreciate all of the enormous sacrifices moms and caregivers make for the sake of their children.

However, not everyone agreed with her post on raising kids, chores, and choice for married life. Some working mothers criticized Castleberry that “there’s those of us who do all that AND work.” Castleberry defended her post by saying that anyone, whether a working mom or working dad, should be able to “read the message and replace the words with words that fit [their] situation.”

More info: Facebook (h/t: attn, 22w)

Tired of constantly hearing the phrase “but what do you do all day?”, Florida-based tattoo artist Ryshell Castleberry wrote this post:

It begins with an imagined situation where a husband complains to his psychologist that his “wife does not work”

The list of tasks she does every day doesn’t end there…

Wait…what about the night?

Castleberry then goes on to list all occupations that moms have

“The woman is like salt”

Castleberry’s post was “liked” more than 640K times and received hundreds of positive replies

However, there were moms who said they work and still manage to do all the tasks she listed

But let’s not forget the stay-at-home dads!

 

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What do you think ?
Doug Stringham
Community Member
5 years ago

Every normal husband who has a wife who stays home knows these facts. Any guy that doesn't acknowledge this is either a narcissist or idiot

Sara Fina
Community Member
5 years ago

There's knowing and there's "knowing" as in being aware of what it all involves AND trying to put oneself in that person's shoes. I'm not a housewife nor a mom but I don't think the worst is the actual work they do it's: 1) not getting paid (husbands of stay-at-home moms actually BELIEVE that the money they make is theirs and that their wives live off of them, without realising how much of that money would magically disappear if the wife was not there and he had to pay for someone to do it all and he would never get the level of care for him and his home and his children that he gets without paying a dime, so no that money is not HIS (exactly the same goes for working wives and stay-at-home dads, of course) 2) the sheer never-endingness of it, in regards of timetable, calendar and extent of care. 3) How invisible their work is and how little or inexistent the recognition is for what they do. 4) The mental exhaustion of being in charge of everything (planning, improvising, coordinating)

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Rafael Tiba
Community Member
5 years ago

first world people are really good at making their life seem so tough on facebook for applause of the masses. funny creatures.

Greg Hoggarth
Community Member
5 years ago

A friend of a highschool friend decided to post on facebook about her "bad week", just to show that "not everyone has a perfect life". It included: we put our 3rd house on the market and it didn't sell for as much money as we were hoping.

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Luspea
Community Member
5 years ago

But the thing is that many women do all this and still work professionally and I would say that's truly impressive

Daria B
Community Member
5 years ago

Yep! My retired mom did just that while bringing up 5 of us.

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Sarah Sherwood
Community Member
5 years ago

Sorry but this husband seems like a total jerk it's supposed to be 50/50 women are not here to pander to your every need

Deborah Kanhai Casado
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Why would it be 50/50 if she's a stay at home mom and housewife? Her husband already has a full time job.

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Violaine LB
Community Member
5 years ago

Many women do that AND work. Also, if my husband was letting me do all of that, I would divorce him - I mean, surely if I have to be up early, he can also get up at night and feed the crying baby with a bottle. And he can do the HW after he's back from work.

Bast Bastet
Community Member
2 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

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Mimi Dean
Community Member
5 years ago

I did both, with very little help. I'm so proud of having persevered in spite of lifelong crushing depression, anxiety, undiagnosed illness, fatigue and pain. I managed before and after divorce to keep my children's lives stable, healthy and consistent. I look back and don't know how I did it. It's impossible to grasp the enormity of parenting until you've done it. Much respect to all those making the effort.

LaDawn Adams
Community Member
5 years ago

Sorry to hear about all your struggles Mimi. I had horrific migraines for over 25 yeas when I was younger; I had 4 children and worked outside the home. When I look back on those years- it was like like living with a very painful disease. I never knew when one would strike me and it could last for several days. The pain was unimaginable.

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Lelia Ungureanu
Community Member
5 years ago

I guess it is very hard not to lose your identity and your self esteem by being "just a housewife"; it seems you get blamed by everyone

Arty
Community Member
5 years ago

you know that in modern couple the husband do/should do stuff as well...

Marius Vildžiūnas
Community Member
5 years ago

USA...always with these crappy article..i'm a guy. i work in IT, i do all the choirs basically, cleaning, cooking dinner and i'm the one who brings money on the table and i'm the one who serves food for guests or makes vacation planning, i'm the navigator, i basically don't have a day off since i'm working on projects. Don't see any problem if you just schedule your all workday in a normal matter. and don't exaggerate the daily routine on a news article.

Micaylah
Community Member
5 years ago

So basically you're a doormat. Is that what you're saying?

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Bratken
Community Member
5 years ago

Sorry for bad english. Well, i tried to complain about my life too.. but damn, you've chosen your wife/husband and there're problems bigger than that. That's not life's point to whine. Value your life and life of your beloved. My marriage is within an inch of divorce because i tried and pitied myself too much like this but i can't actually. I must bring good thing to my family's life. Damn, i hope i'll beat it and save my marriage.

Jc
Community Member
5 years ago

Wow this is impressive! She is doing what every other family does to fonction! (Slow clap) we have 4 kids, one with DS ,both of us work!

Johan Ehrning
Community Member
5 years ago

It all seems alien to me, originating from Sweden. Maybe the article highlights a way of life for many women in the US but.. This is everyday life for moms and dad's in Sweden ADDING a 40-50 hour work week. But still I hope that the work that moms and dads put in as stay at home parents gets the appreciation they deserve, because it's no picknick taking care if a household by yourself.

Herb Eaversmells
Community Member
5 years ago

It's not a typical American family. Every couple I know with young children, both parents have full time jobs and share responsibility with raising the children. Both my wife and myself work full time and take equal part in raising the children. I would say that's more typical than the article portrayed

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Ranj Banga
Community Member
5 years ago

Yeh ok! Bored of this woe is me, stay at home mums,working hard all day. Poor you for not getting recognised. How about us full time working mums whom do both and still suffer guilt for not being there fully for the kids. We juggle everything and bring up emotionally healthy kids by setting an example as to what the real world is like. Times have changed. Spare a thought for professional mums having to deal with dicks in the board room, demanding clients and work stress and still doing everything a stay at home mum does. Football runs, parents evenings, sickness, school issues etc. Do both and then write a stupid article like this.

Victoria Petch
Community Member
5 years ago

Very well said. Plus adding to the guilt that when you get home from work or on your days off your kids are super clingy because they have missed you so much.

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Jessica Prince
Community Member
5 years ago

This post "deserves" more likes? "Likes" are not an indicator of truth or the value of the information. Also, this is common sense stuff.

Xion Memoria
Community Member
5 years ago

To anyone in a situation like this. Leave. It really is easier, and better for the child. If you leave, you're free of the dead weight in the home that only adds to the clutter. Free of having to cook for another picky eater. Free of extra laundry. Free of his whining. And you're free of seeing your child reach for someone who will ignore them for being "too tired" after you've stayed up 36 hours for that same child. Better yet, if he decides (for a change) that he DOES still want to be a part of the child's life, it just gets better for you. Some of that money that was "his and his alone" because you suffered to allow him to earn it is coming your way. You'll be able to afford daycare and SHOWER ALONE in SILENCE. If he wants quality time with the kid, he will likely end up taking them, alone, over the weekend. An entire 2 days where you're allowed to sleep a full 8 hours and your ex is FORCED to take some share of care. If he's contributing nothing in the home, he shouldn't be in it.

Pi...
Community Member
5 years ago

Oh please! Everyone knows that stay-at-home moms n dad's have their share of work. Imagine the condition of both working or single parents!

DGH Rentals
Community Member
5 years ago

This is a great post/topic, but what I don't get is why stuff like changing the car's oil, mowing the lawns, fixing every single thing that breaks, raking leaves, trimming trees, chopping wood, resurfacing the driveway, repairing the roof, fixing the sum pump in the crawl space, doing every renovation ever needed, painting, installing new flooring, new kitchen cabinets, even assembling every piece of furniture purchased, why none of this ever counts as work husbands do, in addition to holding down full time jobs? And we never expect, or dare I say nag, our wives to help with these sorts of things. Why do y'all think that is?

Katinka Min
Community Member
5 years ago

It's simply not a good idea to be a stay at home mom. While your family surely appreciates a 24/7 servant it leaves you without an income and without a pension. Less perfectionism, more involved dads, good daycare and women could actually use their college degrees that they acquired for a ton of money instead of driving around their kids to a gazillion appointments.

Mike Price
Community Member
5 years ago

Actually women have stopped working as of recently overall because the cost of having the kids taken care of is to high and to much stress.

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Jeremy Arguien
Community Member
5 years ago

This stuff makes me ill. Obviously being a stay at home Mom is frigging hard work, so is being a working Mom. Being a working Dad isn't a parade either. Life is hard for everyone but shit like this is just meant to feed the ego. We all make choices and no one is responsible for the choices you make. Personally, I believe that if two people decide to create a child then one of the parents should commit to being at home with the kid...but all this "I am a woman" "I am a mother" "I am fierce" crap is just annoying.

AnnaStacia Penrod
Community Member
5 years ago

The painting in this article is by Ricky Mujica and is entitled "Multitasking". It depicts an average morning with his wife getting ready for work. Next time, give credit to the artist (get permission) and research the images before using them.

Barb Dixon
Community Member
5 years ago

I'm so relieved by your description and explanation of the painting - it makes sense now, if the mother has to get ready for work. I was just thinking " why is she playing with her make-up instead of engaging with her child while she feeds it if she has nothing to do but housework and shopping or whatever?"

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Ray Willis
Community Member
5 years ago

Well said. It is such a shame that most women have to have a paid job as well in order to get enough money to pay for the ridiculous cost of hosting, energy and meet the artificially high expectations of their children e.g. computers, holidays, trendy clothes to keep up appearances with other children e.t.c.

Katinka Min
Community Member
5 years ago

The women I know work because they want to earn their own money, be independent and do something else but cleaning up after others. Earning money to buy children more expensive stuff it definitely not the reason, And with most marriages not lasting 'till death doth us part', NOT working means living in abject poverty once you're old.

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Kay Shoudy
Community Member
5 years ago

When I was a stay at home mom in the 60's this made me so damn mad. I think women should get Social Security for their work at home. I said it then and scandalized the "mad men".

Anja M Grohs
Community Member
5 years ago

Absolutely "AWESOME". This is why I am SINGLE, but I do have animals.

Charley Lochtefeld
Community Member
5 years ago

He's an accountant, she is the wife, gender stereotype much?

Bast Bastet
Community Member
2 years ago

I’m sorry to contradict some of the comments who say that working parents do all that is listed plus they manage to work 8 hours a day... as far as the children are not with you at work, for 8 hours somebody is taking care of them, while the stay at home parent is always taking care. Another thought: there is no paycheck at the end of the month. So somewhere, the stay at home parent takes a huge risk and the whole family takes financial cutbacks because something else is way more important: time with and for your kids, availability 24/24 7/7

Wedding Photography Select
Community Member
5 years ago

SAHM Or Dad is one of the hardest jobs out there. Especially when they are very young. My partner and I share most things and we are still completely exhausted.

Sharon Reed
Community Member
5 years ago

Sounds like it was written by a woman as a man would have just said, "She cooks and cleans" and be done with it.

Amy Hernandez
Community Member
5 years ago

I used to do all of that for 4 kids my husband and myself all while being mistreated and underappreciated by my own husband because I wasnt contributing enough.I realize it takes more then one income to raise a family these days but the second income would have been going straitvto child care anyway so why not mom? Stay home and get to know your babies.Or dad.Just dont let anyone tell you that you are insufficient, lazy taking advantage of or mooching.Especially your own spouse!If you are doing all if the above for your family then you are anything but all while putting up with someone that doesnt appreciate you! Pat yourself on the back.i just did.Im also no longer married and to be brutally honest,couldnt be happier.I hope not everyones spouse was like mine and can appreciate the hard work the stay at home parent does.

David Gray
Community Member
5 years ago

Flip side is often discounted. How often do we hear of husbands being inconsiderate, distant, tired etc? When men and women learn to appreciate each other (no matter the shape of their relationships) things will get better. Being a housewife/husband or stay at home parent is not some arduous task or constant drudgery, but it DOES deserve respect. Having a career also deserves respect. Partners should love, respect and appreciate what the other brings into the partnership, not resent or ignore it. This blade cuts both ways, and that is overlooked FAR more often than wives being unappreciated, imo.

Jodi Carter
Community Member
5 years ago

I was a career Soldier (retired after 20 years) and a single parent of 3 children after I came back from Iraq and Husband left me. No family or friends nearby ect. Motherhood is often a tough, thankless job. It's hard for many to understand what all it entails until they experience themselves. But it's something you just do for the love of your family. I tip my hat to mothers, and also house husbands or single fathers.

Victoria Petch
Community Member
5 years ago

This post is completely true. Although saying that something doesn't sit right with me. Many women don't have a choice and have to go back to work and they find that they still have to do all of the things listed in the post above

Doris Hernandez Myers
Community Member
5 years ago

I'm confused. Is she taking credit for writing this or does she advise she is reposting from another writer? Because I've seen this several times before, and in Spanish too, on the Mujer De Piedra page on Facebook, about a year and a half ago. I love the message but I am wondering is she is taking credit as author. https://www.facebook.com/286396711501759/photos/a.286409461500484.1073741829.286396711501759/626665020808258/?type=3&theater

Flower
Community Member
5 years ago

and we always forget to say Thank You Mom / Dear wife. They are the angels on earth so we should be thankful for them & understand their value as long as they are here.

Arty
Community Member
5 years ago

no! we should help, not let them do everything and thank them like if this was the natural way of life...

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Cap Tan
Community Member
2 months ago

About thinking you should be paid: She doesn't realize how much of the money would disappear if he wasn't there. If a parent complains about putting in time energy or money, they shouldn't be a parent. First right to custody for fathers!

Shruti Patel
Community Member
5 months ago

I never truly understood how my mom worked full time with all the responsibilities and 3 kids .I always thought she is never there when I need her but now after being a wife at home and 3 kids I salute her . Even my dad who supported her decisions in every way.

Quincia Pauldin
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

This is kinda pathetic to me. Many women work and still do those things also. I consider it quite sad too. Where are her/his retirement funds, career, continuing education, and her self success for herself/himself. What about you basic needs and sanitary napkins, spending money for yourself for clothes ? If you weren't there they would still have to clean and pay for a sitter and you are expected to do it for free without any security to your future. That's rather sad. You can work and still raise wonderful children don't let someone take advantage of the love you have for them.

Jato Efiziano
Community Member
3 years ago

I want to say thanks to Dr. JATTO for everything so far. To everyone who doesn’t believe in spell, I was one of those at first. I wasn’t quite sure if I wanted to do this since I’ve tried others so-called spells casters and they did not work and was a waste of time and money. However, when I read through the testimonials of other people at this website and after I talked to Dr. JATTO who answered all my questions and was very nice about everything, I decided to give it a try. I figured it would be my last try to get my Wife back. So my story is that I was at my office when my Wife wrote me that he wasn’t in love with me and never will be and that he didn’t want to speak or see me again, especially since she was talking to this other guy, When I talked to Dr. JATTO , he let me know which spells would be most appropriate for me and I chose the ones that was to get her back to me and stay with me forever. As soon as he started on the spells, my Wife came back in to my life! It was a mirac

Linda Jane
Community Member
3 years ago

After being in relationship with markiss for seven years,he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that never believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I mailed the spell caster, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happil

Paul Mott
Community Member
4 years ago

I raised a child, payed all my bills, got ahead. Without the help of a wife. I would think if a man and a wooman could share the responsabilty, it would be half the work. But hardly ever is.

Darran Leigh
Community Member
4 years ago

She's one of the good ones then... believe me there ARE some out there that dont work and dont do anything around the house either. Same with men, its NOT all one sided

Sheri Wassmuth
Community Member
4 years ago

I'm thankful someone posted this and so proud it was shared so many times!!!! My daughter is a stay at home Mom who suffers from migrains...and cares for her Grandpa who has MDS, drives him 74 miles every Wednesday to his treatment, yet is criticized for not having a job???? By the way she has 3 children 7, 5, 4. God Bless her...keep her strong.

Kimberley Shearer
Community Member
5 years ago

I'm a full time working mum to 2 young children and I still do the majority things these stay at home mums do plus a full days work 5 days a week so they really aren't doing amazing they just choose to stay at home and not work each to there own. I'd rather show my kids a good example and if you want something in life you need to work for it you won't get nothing staying at home not being paid benefits are for people who struggle not for people who choose!!

Bobbijo Almeida
Community Member
5 years ago

I'm a stay at home mom . I love my kids and my husband . I'm thankful I get to be a full time mom. I wanna give a shout out to all mothers that are strictly that. Yes mothers that work your awesome to but you guys still get time off . A second or more to your self. Us strictly stay home moms don't get that and we don't get vacation and held up high for the things we do for are family's. We get put down and called lazy ,disrespected, truth is that's OK.. we get rewarded by ever Smile, hug, kiss,and I love you mom . So to any one out there that can say why can't we work to. We do its called being a full time mom, a full time wife. Thank you to all you awesome straight up angels that are stay home moms. GOD BLESS YOU ALL.

Debra Gajewski
Community Member
5 years ago

It's OK if there is enough money bring brought in .I had to an outside job and run the home too with the help of my husband ...so please ....stay home moms are over rated....

Melvin Dragvelk
Community Member
5 years ago

It is called being a Wife and Mother And with women refusing to be those, they are half the problem with our society today.

Abin Thomas
Community Member
5 years ago

There are mothers who go to work and do all this too salute to them

Micky Bee
Community Member
5 years ago

Has anyone tried email marketing? People check their inbox at least once a day. Business people at least once per hour. Email marketing is an ever green field and it will remain the number 1 source to get more leads and more sales for internet marketers around the world... there is obviously no doubt about it.... As there are plenty of countries where eCommerce is still under development... and email marketing is kind of new thing for residents of these countries....as long as us is concerned there are more than 100 million business online where people need to interact with their customers on day to day basis online.... so there is no doubt about the decrements in the scope of email marketing..... So here At becomeainvestor.com they teach you how to build and maintain a email marketing business Worth a look

Geraldine Gallagher
Community Member
5 years ago

Your right on the bulls eye Doug. Good for you

Heather Kim
Community Member
5 years ago

For me it's interesting that Women still go through the act of being a mom even though it's so much work and they have to vent about it. I listen to all my friends who complain about how a child is so much work and it's exhausting and they fight with their spouses all the time and then ask me why i don't have children. If they gave me some happy stories i'd consider it more...

Vivian Copeland
Community Member
5 years ago

What kind of idiot is this "typical" woman? My husband helps with the chores because he's a good decent man. I stayed home with our son when he was little. It was disheartening sometimes but I it wasn't definitely NOT harder than going in to a job everyday.

Esther Bautista
Community Member
5 years ago

I think it's about value. When I get offended, that I don't work outside the home, deep inside I'm telling myself that that means I am not valid. (But I do work taking care of my daughter who is disabled.) Earning an income seems to be equated with the value of a person. Not only do we need to have babies, but we need to work outside the home otherwise, we are looked down upon or look down at ourselves. Everyone is valuable. No one is better than another because of what they do, how they look, or their status. I see this debate goes on. Trying to "prove" that I am a worthwhile human being is not a good thing to do and causes deep resentments.

Vera Deme
Community Member
5 years ago

Well, what about women like me? I am working full time and take care of the household, plus raise my son ALONE. I cannot describe you how tired I get sometimes. Thanks God I have an amazing son. I need to provide, to be a mom, dad, housewife and do everything alone. From time to time I steal an evening for myself because I will explode. Life is hard and unfair. But kids are all that matter and make it worth it! :)

Janey Homeniuk
Community Member
5 years ago

I'm in my late 60s. When I was a young woman I worked full-time with young children, I worked part time with young children and I stayed home full-time with young children. The job I did when "working" was considered highly stressful. Staying home with my children full-time was by far the most challenging and the most tiring. Being a good mother full-time is very difficult.

Susan Rebman
Community Member
5 years ago

After the children are fyll time students I feel the wife could handle a part time job. The running of a good home requires both parents to accept different roles when they both work. It 's too sad actually but to be honest it takes 2 paychecks these days to get by.

Christian Cave
Community Member
5 years ago

Where are these women? In reality some tasks will be left undone and none of those professions were brushed past and is an insult to the people who work long hours as chefs, taxis and such rhat just because you are a stay at home wife you are awesome. If you were so intensly amazing get a paid job in all these sectors at the same time and earn heaps your only single use husband can learn to be a stay at home dad and maybe improve his skills to your level. Btw have raised my kids single and working and in a working relationship now.

Matt Raddick
Community Member
5 years ago

This was written by a woman that either doesn't appreciate her husbands input into the marriage and family , or a woman that has a slouch for a husband, It is written so 1 sided .

Karen Muir
Community Member
5 years ago

Ye i agree but us working mums work and do all this stuff too ...just saying

LaDawn Adams
Community Member
5 years ago

My mother was the ultimate, best stay at home mother. She sewed our clothes, volunteered at church and schools; our family was very blessed to have her as a role model. I wanted to be a stay at home mom. Other than a few months when each of my children were born- this was not possible As hard as stay at home moms work, women who do both- take care of their family and earn a paycheck- work harder. They have to get up earlier, stay up later, do errands before and after work and on their lunch hour. I did not work for luxuries- I worked for survival. My two stay at home sisters and mother realized that I did work harder. This does not mean that stay at home moms have it easy- they don't; but women who have a family to raised AND a job do work harder.

LaDawn Adams
Community Member
5 years ago

I agree that stay at home mom's work constantly. My mother was a stay at home mom- she sewed our clothes, volunteered at our schools, and made sure the house ran smoothly. I wanted to be a stay at home mother also. Circumstances did not allow this- except for a few months when my children were born. So I worked both at home and as a teacher. I believe that mothers who have an outside job work harder- they do both the stay at home mom jobs and the outside, paying job. This does not diminish what stay at home moms do- but mom's who work outside the home still have the work at home today. I had to get up earlier, stay up later, and do errands before and after work.

andera
Community Member
5 years ago

jeez where i live it's "go to school late come home early take care of the kids and the other at ages 15&under" and im that person at home

David Lewis
Community Member
5 years ago

I do wonder what the stay at home wife and mom would make on the job market as a yearly salary given this article....

Emma Rawlinson-Monteleone
Community Member
5 years ago

However, the mums who work do all of this as well as their job

Cherie Cruz
Community Member
5 years ago

That's everything in a nutshell thanks for breaking it down "a stay at home mom that doesn't work"

Elaine Derks Montgomery
Community Member
5 years ago

It is thee most ungratefull job. 1000 likes for every house wife. Most people wount last in that job discription.

Kathy Banister
Community Member
5 years ago

What's even harder is being a single parent and working and keeping up all said house chores and the kids. And while most stay home mother's do take care of the household, there are so many that just sit around and let the house go filthy and don't take care of the kids and don't know the meaning of cooking a good breakfast.

Sara J. Rixon
Community Member
5 years ago

WOW!!! SHE DOES EVERYTHING!!! WHAT AN AMAZING WOMEN!!! ☺❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

Paula Caruso-Ward
Community Member
5 years ago

i work my full shift and still have to clean shop make meals wash dry fold the clothes and put them away,clean the house go to parent teacher meeting etc i would love to be a house wife alone from working out side the home, they have all day to get these tasks done we have to make them fit into a day after we put our first eight hours in, i find them lucky not better or doing more then us who have to work but dont have a choice but have to get the household chores do as well.

Eric Trahan
Community Member
5 years ago

I was a stay at home daddy, Lookit, The most fun ever but extremely stressful at times. I love my daughter though. She is now 21 and in college away.

Jonathan Eatsalot
Community Member
5 years ago

Let's not forget the single Dads, with full custody of their kids, who work 40+ hours a week and do all the cooking, cleaning, and child rearing at home.

James Egger
Community Member
5 years ago

Parler c'est facile fait une vidéo sur un ou 2 mois. Les tâches dont vous parlez c'est ce vous fêtes sur un mois. Peut être que à l'époque ça existait. Je vois pas comment vous arrivez à faire tous ça alors que vous passez votre temps à vous plaindre

Gena Andreen
Community Member
5 years ago

Same debate, different decade. Or has it been a century. Agree 2 disagree, get on with YOUR life and go do YOUR job.

Anak Shaleh
Community Member
5 years ago

In some countries that just common things, that's how wife should been

Anak Shaleh
Community Member
5 years ago

*should've

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John Ashley
Community Member
5 years ago

If only life were as simple as this, and most pro (or con) commentators here, would have us believe.

endelbendel
Community Member
5 years ago

It's called being retired. Lots of self-righteousness about it.

Carl Gibson
Community Member
5 years ago

Honestly id prefer to have my fiancee stay at home and be a house wife. Sad part about living today is unless u make 80k a year it isnt possible( at least for the way we want to live). Id prefer to come home to a clean house, have have amazing meals and go to bed knowing ive done my job and she took care of all the hard work at home. I dont even have kids yet and I say this, add 3 or 4 kids into the mix and that would make her job a 24 hour a day service towards your family(something you as a working man could not do). A family should be looked at as a team. In my eyes she is the heart and soul of the family taking care of what matters. Hardest job in the world is being stay at home mother. Maybe one day I will be lucky enough to be this man but for now I can only dream.

Xion Memoria
Community Member
5 years ago

Any person who would allow their spouse to work themselves to death so they can rest easy knowing "she took care of all the hard work" isn't someone who deserves to be called a Man. If you do find that woman, she'll either end up dying of an exhaustion induced heart attack (as my aunt did at the age of 32), or leave you because it's easier to pick up after oneself and a baby than adding in dead weight who only makes the home worse. It's easier for mothers to divorce than live with "men" like you. At least in a divorce, the guy HAS to offer financial support and will take sole responsibility of the child on the weekends to give her some respite. I know women who haven't left the house alone in YEARS because their husband won't watch their child. Most guys like you won't lift a finger for the child and whine about having to "Babysit" if they do. With your mentality, a "family" with you could be made only by using you to get a child and then leaving you. Are you not ashamed by that?

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Doris Hernandez Myers
Community Member
5 years ago

i posted this earlier and my comment is not here. I would like to know if the lady who posted this is claiming its her own writing?

Enea
Community Member
5 years ago

Both the post and the responses are kind of frustrating. Leaving gender aside, what does it say about role allocation in a relationship with children? There's one spouse responsible for reproduction/caretaking and one allowed to have a career. Or, equally sad, one who experiences the wonder that is raising children and one who has to earn the family income (or at least most of it). Or there's one spouse who has to juggle a full-time family life and a full-time job. What always gets me is how little appreciation/demand/perception as norm there is of people sharing housework, childcare and job opportunities equally! Sure, it's great if one spouse appreciates the dedication of the other at home or work, but wouldn't it be so much greater if both shared (roughly) equally, thus not only appreciating but actually experiencing what the other experienced? On a systemic note: The (European welfare) state deserves some mentioning in equalizing opportunities: Yeah to kindergarden &school systems!

Elizabeth
Community Member
5 years ago

I think he means that she doesn't work as in she doesn't have a professional job where you get a paycheck. She works in her own way, but in this case thats what I think the husband means.

westwing
Community Member
5 years ago

My mom did all that for me and my brother, cared for her own elderly parents, and worked full time as she was the only breadwinner. So really, this chick is something of a slacker.......

Judy Dermody
Community Member
5 years ago

MY mom worked when we were little she and my dad worked at different time until the three of were older then we pitch in and did the work around the house as much as we could .My Dad was a construction guy and also help with what ever was needed ,we all worked together to help mom

Sasy
Community Member
5 years ago

Some people missed that this was a made up conversation, so this fake man is not a horrible man :) As a child of a single parent who worked my whole life, it is tough. The thing I think that escapes many is that the only experience you may have with parents is AS THEIR CHILD and most children are oblivious to how much they expect of their parents. It cannot be that hard they assume, because they remember their childhood being easy going, spend all day playing, food was there when they wanted it, clothes were clean, magic pixies do that stuff for sure. It does not matter if one or both parents are doing the work, it is just great that it gets done, there are unfortunately many kids raising themselves. There are also many grandparents that raise their grandkids, non family members, foster parents and so on...whoever is doing the work THANK YOU ♥

Jc
Community Member
5 years ago

Hear hear

Marioara Popescu
Community Member
5 years ago

Dude, get a job and pay a house helper, it is a useless sacrifice. You choose not to work and lower yourself to the role of an appliance. I can't respect that. Choosing a life partner with whom you can share house responsibilities and develop as an independent human being with self respect and self worth, THAT I can respect. Sure, nothing wrong with wanting to be a housewife and clean and cook if that is what you like, I personally would love to be a couch potato with a trust fund myself, but asking for respect for that life choice is a completely different matter. How about single parents that do all that and have a job, sometimes two? Now, that deserves respect.

Hayley Lightcap
Community Member
5 years ago

I

Hayley Lightcap
Community Member
5 years ago

That was an accident I'm sorry please walk away

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Leigh Erdman
Community Member
5 years ago

A stay at home mom is the most vital but unrecognized asset in the world. If the work load of one stay at home mom could be harnessed, we would never have a power shortage.

Amanda Larcomb
Community Member
5 years ago

Not trying to be a hater but I told all of those things and work full time as a teacher....

Uni N
Community Member
5 years ago

i didn't like when he keeps f*cking repeating she doesn't work too many time f*ker tht made me angry

FlowerChild
Community Member
5 years ago

I watched my mother raise my brother and I while she and my father both worked full time. Convinced me never 2 have children nor get married

porcupine
Community Member
5 years ago

Sorry, but this is ridiculous. Housework and taking care of kids is called "responsibility." It is something we all have to do.

Monica Carver
Community Member
5 years ago

No choice.. Single Mother. Need I say more?

dash
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

That's more like a hobby than a real job. All the workforce can be easily imported these days, so women and children are pretty much useless. Even shitskins can do things listed in the article. It's only a good will of men that we still keep women and give them some low-tier activities to spend their time with. Luckily prices of prostitution are lowering every year and sex bots are coming, so this will place all women where they belong (and I don't mean kitchen by that). MAKE FEMINISM GREAT AGAIN!

Andrew Ramirez
Community Member
5 years ago

You can't be serious...

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Doug Stringham
Community Member
5 years ago

Every normal husband who has a wife who stays home knows these facts. Any guy that doesn't acknowledge this is either a narcissist or idiot

Sara Fina
Community Member
5 years ago

There's knowing and there's "knowing" as in being aware of what it all involves AND trying to put oneself in that person's shoes. I'm not a housewife nor a mom but I don't think the worst is the actual work they do it's: 1) not getting paid (husbands of stay-at-home moms actually BELIEVE that the money they make is theirs and that their wives live off of them, without realising how much of that money would magically disappear if the wife was not there and he had to pay for someone to do it all and he would never get the level of care for him and his home and his children that he gets without paying a dime, so no that money is not HIS (exactly the same goes for working wives and stay-at-home dads, of course) 2) the sheer never-endingness of it, in regards of timetable, calendar and extent of care. 3) How invisible their work is and how little or inexistent the recognition is for what they do. 4) The mental exhaustion of being in charge of everything (planning, improvising, coordinating)

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Rafael Tiba
Community Member
5 years ago

first world people are really good at making their life seem so tough on facebook for applause of the masses. funny creatures.

Greg Hoggarth
Community Member
5 years ago

A friend of a highschool friend decided to post on facebook about her "bad week", just to show that "not everyone has a perfect life". It included: we put our 3rd house on the market and it didn't sell for as much money as we were hoping.

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Luspea
Community Member
5 years ago

But the thing is that many women do all this and still work professionally and I would say that's truly impressive

Daria B
Community Member
5 years ago

Yep! My retired mom did just that while bringing up 5 of us.

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Sarah Sherwood
Community Member
5 years ago

Sorry but this husband seems like a total jerk it's supposed to be 50/50 women are not here to pander to your every need

Deborah Kanhai Casado
Community Member
5 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

Why would it be 50/50 if she's a stay at home mom and housewife? Her husband already has a full time job.

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Violaine LB
Community Member
5 years ago

Many women do that AND work. Also, if my husband was letting me do all of that, I would divorce him - I mean, surely if I have to be up early, he can also get up at night and feed the crying baby with a bottle. And he can do the HW after he's back from work.

Bast Bastet
Community Member
2 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

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Mimi Dean
Community Member
5 years ago

I did both, with very little help. I'm so proud of having persevered in spite of lifelong crushing depression, anxiety, undiagnosed illness, fatigue and pain. I managed before and after divorce to keep my children's lives stable, healthy and consistent. I look back and don't know how I did it. It's impossible to grasp the enormity of parenting until you've done it. Much respect to all those making the effort.

LaDawn Adams
Community Member
5 years ago

Sorry to hear about all your struggles Mimi. I had horrific migraines for over 25 yeas when I was younger; I had 4 children and worked outside the home. When I look back on those years- it was like like living with a very painful disease. I never knew when one would strike me and it could last for several days. The pain was unimaginable.

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Lelia Ungureanu
Community Member
5 years ago

I guess it is very hard not to lose your identity and your self esteem by being "just a housewife"; it seems you get blamed by everyone

Arty
Community Member
5 years ago

you know that in modern couple the husband do/should do stuff as well...

Marius Vildžiūnas
Community Member
5 years ago

USA...always with these crappy article..i'm a guy. i work in IT, i do all the choirs basically, cleaning, cooking dinner and i'm the one who brings money on the table and i'm the one who serves food for guests or makes vacation planning, i'm the navigator, i basically don't have a day off since i'm working on projects. Don't see any problem if you just schedule your all workday in a normal matter. and don't exaggerate the daily routine on a news article.

Micaylah
Community Member
5 years ago

So basically you're a doormat. Is that what you're saying?

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Bratken
Community Member
5 years ago

Sorry for bad english. Well, i tried to complain about my life too.. but damn, you've chosen your wife/husband and there're problems bigger than that. That's not life's point to whine. Value your life and life of your beloved. My marriage is within an inch of divorce because i tried and pitied myself too much like this but i can't actually. I must bring good thing to my family's life. Damn, i hope i'll beat it and save my marriage.

Jc
Community Member
5 years ago

Wow this is impressive! She is doing what every other family does to fonction! (Slow clap) we have 4 kids, one with DS ,both of us work!

Johan Ehrning
Community Member
5 years ago

It all seems alien to me, originating from Sweden. Maybe the article highlights a way of life for many women in the US but.. This is everyday life for moms and dad's in Sweden ADDING a 40-50 hour work week. But still I hope that the work that moms and dads put in as stay at home parents gets the appreciation they deserve, because it's no picknick taking care if a household by yourself.

Herb Eaversmells
Community Member
5 years ago

It's not a typical American family. Every couple I know with young children, both parents have full time jobs and share responsibility with raising the children. Both my wife and myself work full time and take equal part in raising the children. I would say that's more typical than the article portrayed

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Ranj Banga
Community Member
5 years ago

Yeh ok! Bored of this woe is me, stay at home mums,working hard all day. Poor you for not getting recognised. How about us full time working mums whom do both and still suffer guilt for not being there fully for the kids. We juggle everything and bring up emotionally healthy kids by setting an example as to what the real world is like. Times have changed. Spare a thought for professional mums having to deal with dicks in the board room, demanding clients and work stress and still doing everything a stay at home mum does. Football runs, parents evenings, sickness, school issues etc. Do both and then write a stupid article like this.

Victoria Petch
Community Member
5 years ago

Very well said. Plus adding to the guilt that when you get home from work or on your days off your kids are super clingy because they have missed you so much.

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Jessica Prince
Community Member
5 years ago

This post "deserves" more likes? "Likes" are not an indicator of truth or the value of the information. Also, this is common sense stuff.

Xion Memoria
Community Member
5 years ago

To anyone in a situation like this. Leave. It really is easier, and better for the child. If you leave, you're free of the dead weight in the home that only adds to the clutter. Free of having to cook for another picky eater. Free of extra laundry. Free of his whining. And you're free of seeing your child reach for someone who will ignore them for being "too tired" after you've stayed up 36 hours for that same child. Better yet, if he decides (for a change) that he DOES still want to be a part of the child's life, it just gets better for you. Some of that money that was "his and his alone" because you suffered to allow him to earn it is coming your way. You'll be able to afford daycare and SHOWER ALONE in SILENCE. If he wants quality time with the kid, he will likely end up taking them, alone, over the weekend. An entire 2 days where you're allowed to sleep a full 8 hours and your ex is FORCED to take some share of care. If he's contributing nothing in the home, he shouldn't be in it.

Pi...
Community Member
5 years ago

Oh please! Everyone knows that stay-at-home moms n dad's have their share of work. Imagine the condition of both working or single parents!

DGH Rentals
Community Member
5 years ago

This is a great post/topic, but what I don't get is why stuff like changing the car's oil, mowing the lawns, fixing every single thing that breaks, raking leaves, trimming trees, chopping wood, resurfacing the driveway, repairing the roof, fixing the sum pump in the crawl space, doing every renovation ever needed, painting, installing new flooring, new kitchen cabinets, even assembling every piece of furniture purchased, why none of this ever counts as work husbands do, in addition to holding down full time jobs? And we never expect, or dare I say nag, our wives to help with these sorts of things. Why do y'all think that is?

Katinka Min
Community Member
5 years ago

It's simply not a good idea to be a stay at home mom. While your family surely appreciates a 24/7 servant it leaves you without an income and without a pension. Less perfectionism, more involved dads, good daycare and women could actually use their college degrees that they acquired for a ton of money instead of driving around their kids to a gazillion appointments.

Mike Price
Community Member
5 years ago

Actually women have stopped working as of recently overall because the cost of having the kids taken care of is to high and to much stress.

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Jeremy Arguien
Community Member
5 years ago

This stuff makes me ill. Obviously being a stay at home Mom is frigging hard work, so is being a working Mom. Being a working Dad isn't a parade either. Life is hard for everyone but shit like this is just meant to feed the ego. We all make choices and no one is responsible for the choices you make. Personally, I believe that if two people decide to create a child then one of the parents should commit to being at home with the kid...but all this "I am a woman" "I am a mother" "I am fierce" crap is just annoying.

AnnaStacia Penrod
Community Member
5 years ago

The painting in this article is by Ricky Mujica and is entitled "Multitasking". It depicts an average morning with his wife getting ready for work. Next time, give credit to the artist (get permission) and research the images before using them.

Barb Dixon
Community Member
5 years ago

I'm so relieved by your description and explanation of the painting - it makes sense now, if the mother has to get ready for work. I was just thinking " why is she playing with her make-up instead of engaging with her child while she feeds it if she has nothing to do but housework and shopping or whatever?"

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Ray Willis
Community Member
5 years ago

Well said. It is such a shame that most women have to have a paid job as well in order to get enough money to pay for the ridiculous cost of hosting, energy and meet the artificially high expectations of their children e.g. computers, holidays, trendy clothes to keep up appearances with other children e.t.c.

Katinka Min
Community Member
5 years ago

The women I know work because they want to earn their own money, be independent and do something else but cleaning up after others. Earning money to buy children more expensive stuff it definitely not the reason, And with most marriages not lasting 'till death doth us part', NOT working means living in abject poverty once you're old.

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Kay Shoudy
Community Member
5 years ago

When I was a stay at home mom in the 60's this made me so damn mad. I think women should get Social Security for their work at home. I said it then and scandalized the "mad men".

Anja M Grohs
Community Member
5 years ago

Absolutely "AWESOME". This is why I am SINGLE, but I do have animals.

Charley Lochtefeld
Community Member
5 years ago

He's an accountant, she is the wife, gender stereotype much?

Bast Bastet
Community Member
2 years ago

I’m sorry to contradict some of the comments who say that working parents do all that is listed plus they manage to work 8 hours a day... as far as the children are not with you at work, for 8 hours somebody is taking care of them, while the stay at home parent is always taking care. Another thought: there is no paycheck at the end of the month. So somewhere, the stay at home parent takes a huge risk and the whole family takes financial cutbacks because something else is way more important: time with and for your kids, availability 24/24 7/7

Wedding Photography Select
Community Member
5 years ago

SAHM Or Dad is one of the hardest jobs out there. Especially when they are very young. My partner and I share most things and we are still completely exhausted.

Sharon Reed
Community Member
5 years ago

Sounds like it was written by a woman as a man would have just said, "She cooks and cleans" and be done with it.

Amy Hernandez
Community Member
5 years ago

I used to do all of that for 4 kids my husband and myself all while being mistreated and underappreciated by my own husband because I wasnt contributing enough.I realize it takes more then one income to raise a family these days but the second income would have been going straitvto child care anyway so why not mom? Stay home and get to know your babies.Or dad.Just dont let anyone tell you that you are insufficient, lazy taking advantage of or mooching.Especially your own spouse!If you are doing all if the above for your family then you are anything but all while putting up with someone that doesnt appreciate you! Pat yourself on the back.i just did.Im also no longer married and to be brutally honest,couldnt be happier.I hope not everyones spouse was like mine and can appreciate the hard work the stay at home parent does.

David Gray
Community Member
5 years ago

Flip side is often discounted. How often do we hear of husbands being inconsiderate, distant, tired etc? When men and women learn to appreciate each other (no matter the shape of their relationships) things will get better. Being a housewife/husband or stay at home parent is not some arduous task or constant drudgery, but it DOES deserve respect. Having a career also deserves respect. Partners should love, respect and appreciate what the other brings into the partnership, not resent or ignore it. This blade cuts both ways, and that is overlooked FAR more often than wives being unappreciated, imo.

Jodi Carter
Community Member
5 years ago

I was a career Soldier (retired after 20 years) and a single parent of 3 children after I came back from Iraq and Husband left me. No family or friends nearby ect. Motherhood is often a tough, thankless job. It's hard for many to understand what all it entails until they experience themselves. But it's something you just do for the love of your family. I tip my hat to mothers, and also house husbands or single fathers.

Victoria Petch
Community Member
5 years ago

This post is completely true. Although saying that something doesn't sit right with me. Many women don't have a choice and have to go back to work and they find that they still have to do all of the things listed in the post above

Doris Hernandez Myers
Community Member
5 years ago

I'm confused. Is she taking credit for writing this or does she advise she is reposting from another writer? Because I've seen this several times before, and in Spanish too, on the Mujer De Piedra page on Facebook, about a year and a half ago. I love the message but I am wondering is she is taking credit as author. https://www.facebook.com/286396711501759/photos/a.286409461500484.1073741829.286396711501759/626665020808258/?type=3&theater

Flower
Community Member
5 years ago

and we always forget to say Thank You Mom / Dear wife. They are the angels on earth so we should be thankful for them & understand their value as long as they are here.

Arty
Community Member
5 years ago

no! we should help, not let them do everything and thank them like if this was the natural way of life...

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Cap Tan
Community Member
2 months ago

About thinking you should be paid: She doesn't realize how much of the money would disappear if he wasn't there. If a parent complains about putting in time energy or money, they shouldn't be a parent. First right to custody for fathers!

Shruti Patel
Community Member
5 months ago

I never truly understood how my mom worked full time with all the responsibilities and 3 kids .I always thought she is never there when I need her but now after being a wife at home and 3 kids I salute her . Even my dad who supported her decisions in every way.

Quincia Pauldin
Community Member
2 years ago (edited)

This is kinda pathetic to me. Many women work and still do those things also. I consider it quite sad too. Where are her/his retirement funds, career, continuing education, and her self success for herself/himself. What about you basic needs and sanitary napkins, spending money for yourself for clothes ? If you weren't there they would still have to clean and pay for a sitter and you are expected to do it for free without any security to your future. That's rather sad. You can work and still raise wonderful children don't let someone take advantage of the love you have for them.

Jato Efiziano
Community Member
3 years ago

I want to say thanks to Dr. JATTO for everything so far. To everyone who doesn’t believe in spell, I was one of those at first. I wasn’t quite sure if I wanted to do this since I’ve tried others so-called spells casters and they did not work and was a waste of time and money. However, when I read through the testimonials of other people at this website and after I talked to Dr. JATTO who answered all my questions and was very nice about everything, I decided to give it a try. I figured it would be my last try to get my Wife back. So my story is that I was at my office when my Wife wrote me that he wasn’t in love with me and never will be and that he didn’t want to speak or see me again, especially since she was talking to this other guy, When I talked to Dr. JATTO , he let me know which spells would be most appropriate for me and I chose the ones that was to get her back to me and stay with me forever. As soon as he started on the spells, my Wife came back in to my life! It was a mirac

Linda Jane
Community Member
3 years ago

After being in relationship with markiss for seven years,he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that never believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I mailed the spell caster, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happil

Paul Mott
Community Member
4 years ago

I raised a child, payed all my bills, got ahead. Without the help of a wife. I would think if a man and a wooman could share the responsabilty, it would be half the work. But hardly ever is.

Darran Leigh
Community Member
4 years ago

She's one of the good ones then... believe me there ARE some out there that dont work and dont do anything around the house either. Same with men, its NOT all one sided

Sheri Wassmuth
Community Member
4 years ago

I'm thankful someone posted this and so proud it was shared so many times!!!! My daughter is a stay at home Mom who suffers from migrains...and cares for her Grandpa who has MDS, drives him 74 miles every Wednesday to his treatment, yet is criticized for not having a job???? By the way she has 3 children 7, 5, 4. God Bless her...keep her strong.

Kimberley Shearer
Community Member
5 years ago

I'm a full time working mum to 2 young children and I still do the majority things these stay at home mums do plus a full days work 5 days a week so they really aren't doing amazing they just choose to stay at home and not work each to there own. I'd rather show my kids a good example and if you want something in life you need to work for it you won't get nothing staying at home not being paid benefits are for people who struggle not for people who choose!!

Bobbijo Almeida
Community Member
5 years ago

I'm a stay at home mom . I love my kids and my husband . I'm thankful I get to be a full time mom. I wanna give a shout out to all mothers that are strictly that. Yes mothers that work your awesome to but you guys still get time off . A second or more to your self. Us strictly stay home moms don't get that and we don't get vacation and held up high for the things we do for are family's. We get put down and called lazy ,disrespected, truth is that's OK.. we get rewarded by ever Smile, hug, kiss,and I love you mom . So to any one out there that can say why can't we work to. We do its called being a full time mom, a full time wife. Thank you to all you awesome straight up angels that are stay home moms. GOD BLESS YOU ALL.

Debra Gajewski
Community Member
5 years ago

It's OK if there is enough money bring brought in .I had to an outside job and run the home too with the help of my husband ...so please ....stay home moms are over rated....

Melvin Dragvelk
Community Member
5 years ago

It is called being a Wife and Mother And with women refusing to be those, they are half the problem with our society today.

Abin Thomas
Community Member
5 years ago

There are mothers who go to work and do all this too salute to them

Micky Bee
Community Member
5 years ago

Has anyone tried email marketing? People check their inbox at least once a day. Business people at least once per hour. Email marketing is an ever green field and it will remain the number 1 source to get more leads and more sales for internet marketers around the world... there is obviously no doubt about it.... As there are plenty of countries where eCommerce is still under development... and email marketing is kind of new thing for residents of these countries....as long as us is concerned there are more than 100 million business online where people need to interact with their customers on day to day basis online.... so there is no doubt about the decrements in the scope of email marketing..... So here At becomeainvestor.com they teach you how to build and maintain a email marketing business Worth a look

Geraldine Gallagher
Community Member
5 years ago

Your right on the bulls eye Doug. Good for you

Heather Kim
Community Member
5 years ago

For me it's interesting that Women still go through the act of being a mom even though it's so much work and they have to vent about it. I listen to all my friends who complain about how a child is so much work and it's exhausting and they fight with their spouses all the time and then ask me why i don't have children. If they gave me some happy stories i'd consider it more...

Vivian Copeland
Community Member
5 years ago

What kind of idiot is this "typical" woman? My husband helps with the chores because he's a good decent man. I stayed home with our son when he was little. It was disheartening sometimes but I it wasn't definitely NOT harder than going in to a job everyday.

Esther Bautista
Community Member
5 years ago

I think it's about value. When I get offended, that I don't work outside the home, deep inside I'm telling myself that that means I am not valid. (But I do work taking care of my daughter who is disabled.) Earning an income seems to be equated with the value of a person. Not only do we need to have babies, but we need to work outside the home otherwise, we are looked down upon or look down at ourselves. Everyone is valuable. No one is better than another because of what they do, how they look, or their status. I see this debate goes on. Trying to "prove" that I am a worthwhile human being is not a good thing to do and causes deep resentments.

Vera Deme
Community Member
5 years ago

Well, what about women like me? I am working full time and take care of the household, plus raise my son ALONE. I cannot describe you how tired I get sometimes. Thanks God I have an amazing son. I need to provide, to be a mom, dad, housewife and do everything alone. From time to time I steal an evening for myself because I will explode. Life is hard and unfair. But kids are all that matter and make it worth it! :)

Janey Homeniuk
Community Member
5 years ago

I'm in my late 60s. When I was a young woman I worked full-time with young children, I worked part time with young children and I stayed home full-time with young children. The job I did when "working" was considered highly stressful. Staying home with my children full-time was by far the most challenging and the most tiring. Being a good mother full-time is very difficult.

Susan Rebman
Community Member
5 years ago

After the children are fyll time students I feel the wife could handle a part time job. The running of a good home requires both parents to accept different roles when they both work. It 's too sad actually but to be honest it takes 2 paychecks these days to get by.

Christian Cave
Community Member
5 years ago

Where are these women? In reality some tasks will be left undone and none of those professions were brushed past and is an insult to the people who work long hours as chefs, taxis and such rhat just because you are a stay at home wife you are awesome. If you were so intensly amazing get a paid job in all these sectors at the same time and earn heaps your only single use husband can learn to be a stay at home dad and maybe improve his skills to your level. Btw have raised my kids single and working and in a working relationship now.

Matt Raddick
Community Member
5 years ago

This was written by a woman that either doesn't appreciate her husbands input into the marriage and family , or a woman that has a slouch for a husband, It is written so 1 sided .

Karen Muir
Community Member
5 years ago

Ye i agree but us working mums work and do all this stuff too ...just saying

LaDawn Adams
Community Member
5 years ago

My mother was the ultimate, best stay at home mother. She sewed our clothes, volunteered at church and schools; our family was very blessed to have her as a role model. I wanted to be a stay at home mom. Other than a few months when each of my children were born- this was not possible As hard as stay at home moms work, women who do both- take care of their family and earn a paycheck- work harder. They have to get up earlier, stay up later, do errands before and after work and on their lunch hour. I did not work for luxuries- I worked for survival. My two stay at home sisters and mother realized that I did work harder. This does not mean that stay at home moms have it easy- they don't; but women who have a family to raised AND a job do work harder.

LaDawn Adams
Community Member
5 years ago

I agree that stay at home mom's work constantly. My mother was a stay at home mom- she sewed our clothes, volunteered at our schools, and made sure the house ran smoothly. I wanted to be a stay at home mother also. Circumstances did not allow this- except for a few months when my children were born. So I worked both at home and as a teacher. I believe that mothers who have an outside job work harder- they do both the stay at home mom jobs and the outside, paying job. This does not diminish what stay at home moms do- but mom's who work outside the home still have the work at home today. I had to get up earlier, stay up later, and do errands before and after work.

andera
Community Member
5 years ago

jeez where i live it's "go to school late come home early take care of the kids and the other at ages 15&under" and im that person at home

David Lewis
Community Member
5 years ago

I do wonder what the stay at home wife and mom would make on the job market as a yearly salary given this article....

Emma Rawlinson-Monteleone
Community Member
5 years ago

However, the mums who work do all of this as well as their job

Cherie Cruz
Community Member
5 years ago

That's everything in a nutshell thanks for breaking it down "a stay at home mom that doesn't work"

Elaine Derks Montgomery
Community Member
5 years ago

It is thee most ungratefull job. 1000 likes for every house wife. Most people wount last in that job discription.

Kathy Banister
Community Member
5 years ago

What's even harder is being a single parent and working and keeping up all said house chores and the kids. And while most stay home mother's do take care of the household, there are so many that just sit around and let the house go filthy and don't take care of the kids and don't know the meaning of cooking a good breakfast.

Sara J. Rixon
Community Member
5 years ago

WOW!!! SHE DOES EVERYTHING!!! WHAT AN AMAZING WOMEN!!! ☺❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

Paula Caruso-Ward
Community Member
5 years ago

i work my full shift and still have to clean shop make meals wash dry fold the clothes and put them away,clean the house go to parent teacher meeting etc i would love to be a house wife alone from working out side the home, they have all day to get these tasks done we have to make them fit into a day after we put our first eight hours in, i find them lucky not better or doing more then us who have to work but dont have a choice but have to get the household chores do as well.

Eric Trahan
Community Member
5 years ago

I was a stay at home daddy, Lookit, The most fun ever but extremely stressful at times. I love my daughter though. She is now 21 and in college away.

Jonathan Eatsalot
Community Member
5 years ago

Let's not forget the single Dads, with full custody of their kids, who work 40+ hours a week and do all the cooking, cleaning, and child rearing at home.

James Egger
Community Member
5 years ago

Parler c'est facile fait une vidéo sur un ou 2 mois. Les tâches dont vous parlez c'est ce vous fêtes sur un mois. Peut être que à l'époque ça existait. Je vois pas comment vous arrivez à faire tous ça alors que vous passez votre temps à vous plaindre

Gena Andreen
Community Member
5 years ago

Same debate, different decade. Or has it been a century. Agree 2 disagree, get on with YOUR life and go do YOUR job.

Anak Shaleh
Community Member
5 years ago

In some countries that just common things, that's how wife should been

Anak Shaleh
Community Member
5 years ago

*should've

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John Ashley
Community Member
5 years ago

If only life were as simple as this, and most pro (or con) commentators here, would have us believe.

endelbendel
Community Member
5 years ago

It's called being retired. Lots of self-righteousness about it.

Carl Gibson
Community Member
5 years ago

Honestly id prefer to have my fiancee stay at home and be a house wife. Sad part about living today is unless u make 80k a year it isnt possible( at least for the way we want to live). Id prefer to come home to a clean house, have have amazing meals and go to bed knowing ive done my job and she took care of all the hard work at home. I dont even have kids yet and I say this, add 3 or 4 kids into the mix and that would make her job a 24 hour a day service towards your family(something you as a working man could not do). A family should be looked at as a team. In my eyes she is the heart and soul of the family taking care of what matters. Hardest job in the world is being stay at home mother. Maybe one day I will be lucky enough to be this man but for now I can only dream.

Xion Memoria
Community Member
5 years ago

Any person who would allow their spouse to work themselves to death so they can rest easy knowing "she took care of all the hard work" isn't someone who deserves to be called a Man. If you do find that woman, she'll either end up dying of an exhaustion induced heart attack (as my aunt did at the age of 32), or leave you because it's easier to pick up after oneself and a baby than adding in dead weight who only makes the home worse. It's easier for mothers to divorce than live with "men" like you. At least in a divorce, the guy HAS to offer financial support and will take sole responsibility of the child on the weekends to give her some respite. I know women who haven't left the house alone in YEARS because their husband won't watch their child. Most guys like you won't lift a finger for the child and whine about having to "Babysit" if they do. With your mentality, a "family" with you could be made only by using you to get a child and then leaving you. Are you not ashamed by that?

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Doris Hernandez Myers
Community Member
5 years ago

i posted this earlier and my comment is not here. I would like to know if the lady who posted this is claiming its her own writing?

Enea
Community Member
5 years ago

Both the post and the responses are kind of frustrating. Leaving gender aside, what does it say about role allocation in a relationship with children? There's one spouse responsible for reproduction/caretaking and one allowed to have a career. Or, equally sad, one who experiences the wonder that is raising children and one who has to earn the family income (or at least most of it). Or there's one spouse who has to juggle a full-time family life and a full-time job. What always gets me is how little appreciation/demand/perception as norm there is of people sharing housework, childcare and job opportunities equally! Sure, it's great if one spouse appreciates the dedication of the other at home or work, but wouldn't it be so much greater if both shared (roughly) equally, thus not only appreciating but actually experiencing what the other experienced? On a systemic note: The (European welfare) state deserves some mentioning in equalizing opportunities: Yeah to kindergarden &school systems!

Elizabeth
Community Member
5 years ago

I think he means that she doesn't work as in she doesn't have a professional job where you get a paycheck. She works in her own way, but in this case thats what I think the husband means.

westwing
Community Member
5 years ago

My mom did all that for me and my brother, cared for her own elderly parents, and worked full time as she was the only breadwinner. So really, this chick is something of a slacker.......

Judy Dermody
Community Member
5 years ago

MY mom worked when we were little she and my dad worked at different time until the three of were older then we pitch in and did the work around the house as much as we could .My Dad was a construction guy and also help with what ever was needed ,we all worked together to help mom

Sasy
Community Member
5 years ago

Some people missed that this was a made up conversation, so this fake man is not a horrible man :) As a child of a single parent who worked my whole life, it is tough. The thing I think that escapes many is that the only experience you may have with parents is AS THEIR CHILD and most children are oblivious to how much they expect of their parents. It cannot be that hard they assume, because they remember their childhood being easy going, spend all day playing, food was there when they wanted it, clothes were clean, magic pixies do that stuff for sure. It does not matter if one or both parents are doing the work, it is just great that it gets done, there are unfortunately many kids raising themselves. There are also many grandparents that raise their grandkids, non family members, foster parents and so on...whoever is doing the work THANK YOU ♥

Jc
Community Member
5 years ago

Hear hear

Marioara Popescu
Community Member
5 years ago

Dude, get a job and pay a house helper, it is a useless sacrifice. You choose not to work and lower yourse