Father Is Upset As His Son Comes Home From School With Marks On His Hand Recording Times He Was Bullied Over 2 Days
The new school year brings children and parents not only joys, but also various sorrows. For some, these are bad school grades, for some – problems with the schedule, and for some, alas, one of the main and most common issues of modern schools – bullying.
Recently, more and more attention has been paid to this problem, and we are increasingly revealing the scale of it. To tell the truth, bullying has existed for all time; the attitude towards it has simply changed. If somewhere in the middle of the 20th century it was perceived as an integral element of the so-called socialization process, now schools are actively fighting this. But the problem still remains.
Matthew Beard, a father of three from London, had to deal with it after his son’s first days in high school. The father told about this situation on Twitter, collecting more than 600 reactions in just a few hours and provoking an active discussion of the problem of school bullying among parents and educators.
More info: Twitter
The Original Poster saw his son’s hand covered with hand-drawn pen marks after two days at high school
Image credits: Alex Starr
So, when Matthew’s son returned from school one day, his dad noticed strange marks made with a pen on his hand. Matthew asked what it was, and the boy said that he himself decided to leave a mark every time he was bullied, both physically and verbally, by other students.
Image credits: mattbeard02
Image credits: mattbeard02
The marks meant that the OP’s son was bullied, physically or verbally, 21 times over two days at school
In just two days, 21 marks were accumulated on the child’s hand, and this shocked Matthew so much that he decided to share his outrage online. In the second tweet, the man stated that he feels the photo is powerful and that he thinks schools need to come down harder on bullies, while their parents should be fined.
Image credits: LilyAgg8
Image credits: pedrogarcialoca
Matthew thinks that too many parents simply don’t know what’s going on with their kids in schools and expect them to be safe, but that’s unfortunately not the case. Some people, alas, believe that everything will resolve itself.
Image credits: markaxon
Image credits: jioeyy
Image credits: alanrussell80
According to statistical data, around 20% of students in recent years reported being bullied
Of course, this is not true. According to statistics compiled by the National Center for Educational Statistics, in recent years, about 20.2% of students report being bullied. Thus, the issue of countering bullying should be addressed at all pedagogical levels. For example, it is very important to develop a sense of mutual connection in students of all ages.
Image credits: algbonnie
Image credits: Pippa35
Image credits: AndyK_LivNews
“It’s all about connection,” says associated professor Nancy Beardall, who created and implemented a bullying prevention curriculum in Newton Public Schools, in her interview for Lesley University’s website. “When students feel connected to their peers, their school, and their community, they do better.”
Image credits: Jon_Chalk1
Image credits: lcampbell10
Image credits: MaggieA62
People in the comments massively supported the OP and his son, and suggested various ways to counter school bullying as well
We must say that most of the commenters supported the father in his desire to raise the issue of school bullying. In particular, Matthew was praised for having already jumped the first biggest hurdle, which many don’t. Twitter users hope that the school administration will respond as quickly and efficiently as possible.
Image credits: Kingwolf84
Image credits: tracybnbell
Image credits: _iamreaper
Image credits: waynetuckwell
Image credits: karenbeardy
However, some users advised Matthew to simply teach his son to fight back. Based on their own experience, they said that they were also bullied at school, and only by learning how to fight did they manage to overcome it. On the other hand, responding to violence with violence is not a completely civilized approach, and the fight against bullying in the education system should be as comprehensive as possible, affecting both children and parents.
Image credits: danielefiok1
Image credits: DannyF83246063
Image credits: Danvill1
Image credits: TonyFarmer13
You can always tell us your opinion about this situation in the comments to this post, and if you have your own idea on how to counter bullying in schools, please let us know about it.
People say it’s character building to be bullied. It sure is - my character is one who is depressed, anxious, no self esteem, zero self worth etc. I’m 51 now. It stays with you, because you are mostly bullied during your formative years when you are developing as a person. If you are told something often enough, you start to believe it
Only bullies say bullying is positive for character building, and that includes parents. "Boys will be boys", "man up", "they only do it because they like you". There are countless excuses to do nothing about it. I hope you're faring a bit better now.
Load More Replies... The worst part is that if someone does defend themselves, they will likely get expelled. I actually went to school with someone who would harass black students and call them the n-word. Multiple students that he did this to beat him up and got expelled. Nothing ever happened to the culprit (aside from getting beaten up). Even going to the principal and defending them accomplished nothing because schools in the south have a zero tolerance policy for violence but a "boys will be boys" policy for abject racism. There were also several suicides at the school. Hoping things are at least a little better then they were 20 years ago.
I got bullied in elementary school. Quite a lot. I hated it. Switching classes didn't help, parents intervention didn't help, switching school helped quite a lot. I was still unpopular, but being unpopular is totally different thing than being bullied, so..it was a kind a relief. Fast forward 24 years. I have returned in my hometown for a visit to mother and grandmother. My former bully became a real estate broker. In a time we were about to sell a property somewhere. He got in contact, totally doesn't remember me. You know what... when you cut down a tree with an axe, the axe doesn't remember a thing, but the tree remembers it all. I didn't let him get this opportunity. Not even after years. Karma? Schadenfreude? Maybe. Or maybe - I can allow myself to be picky now.
I was verbally bullied at school, I told my mum who then talked to my form teacher, her reply... 'oh they are such lovely girls, they wouldn't do that'. My older sister took matters into her own hands and threatened them to leave me alone, they told my form teacher and I got into trouble! At least they left me alone after that. Schools suck at dealing with bullying, they don't want to know.
Sadly, something is going on at home that these kids are bullies. I was a bully when I was younger. Only because I was being bullied at home and watched my father bully my siblings and mother. I was also bullied and picked on in school. I'm sorry that your child has to go through this. It's awful and scary.
The evidence does not back this up. Although it seems like common sense that bullies are somehow "broken" or suffering themselves, this doesn't seem to be accurate.
Load More Replies...
I was bullied from the second Kindergarten year till year 8/9. I have been always a caring Person with strong Feelings what is right and wrong and didn't want to do something Bad myself by doing what they did sometimes. So, i was clearly helpless and always had my head down. Bullied differ but Most oft them are more triggered, if you act like a victim (this is Bad and really should Do the opposide, victims should be protected, but this is what i observed) so, what did change the Situation was, to go to self defence classes! I highly reccommend this. Not to be able to kick someones a*s (in the correct fifghting school you learn to Better not fight or hurt someone), but to grow selfesteem! It needs time but you learn to Look like someone who could and would fight for yourself. You feel like you just pretend it but your posture change and this can keep some bullies away. Then, of course there are bullies, who got triggered by people who seem to want to fight. Be careful with this type
And observe if it is better this time to Look down. Another plus to go to selfdefense classes are, that you usually learn to Fall. So when you are good trained and Trip you maybe will automatically roll and don't break your arm because you Fell on it. (my So had an accident with His bike but rolled over and was just finde what other ways could have breaked His Handys, Arms and maybe neck)
Load More Replies...
Unfortunately, the one being bullied will be the one punished by the school and said bully gets away with it. Especially if the bully is "on the team" or "parents are rich and/or influential" etc. Sometimes, even the teachers are in on it. Then, the bully will give it to them worse. The outcomes of these situations can be devastating.
I was bullied physically and mentally my entire school career. Much of what was done to me in the '70's and '80's is now called sexual harassment. Nobody gave a damn. In eighth grade, we got to buy class shirts. Every kid was supposed to sign this paper they used for the template. I refused, because I didn't want to ruin everyone's shirt. If I came across a child with that low of self-esteem, I'd have brought it up with the parents. The teachers didn't care. Some of the kids heard me tell a teacher why I hadn't signed it, and started a petition for me to sign the shirt. All but one kid wanted my name on the shirt. Because of the petition, I signed. The bullying from my year group lessened a great deal after that, although the rest of the kids never stopped.
Move. Pull out of school. Homeschool. Or go to a different school do whatever you have to you're doing nothing you should be ashamed find a different school it doesn't matter if you go to the authorities at the school it's already started. Why wait go to a different school
This one s Absolutely 100% UNACCEPTABLE. Bullying may be hard to see, but if a child can count 20+ times in two weeks, then WTF? Teachers, Counselors, & most of all, ADMINISTRATORS HAVE NO EXCUSES. People in these positions Must Make it their business to be on High alert for vulnerable kids.What are you there for if not for protecting the vulnerable?! This is NOT a nuanced problem. Hold the adults AND the bullies accountable! NOW! Finally, fine parents/guardians of bullies. Money talks. Bullies need to be taken Out of schools & everywhee else.
The thing is that the worst bully’s tend to be the most popular kids. The bully’s don’t have self esteem issues The do it because they get away with it. No one, including teachers , pulls them up. There should be policy that starts in the class room., No telling anyone to Shut Up when voicing an opinion, no name calling, NOT ALLOWING THE POPULAR ONES TO HOG THE ATTENTION. Making sure Every child gets a turn at special tasks & most of all EXCLUDING BULLYS FROM FUN ACTIVITIES. Actions must have consequences. Sadly when I was at school the teachers bullied me far worse than the kids did.
Parents don't use the word no anymore and sometimes this is the issue. A teacher tries and if succeeds the student goes and takes it out on another classmate. Bullying. They can also have a strict home and come to school and take it out on other classmates that way. I was bullied from grade school (about grade 2/3) to high school. One girl and her crew that rotated around her but mostly her. In junior high (grade 7-8 and about 11-13 yrs old) it was a slew of different kids. The main bully was two years older and I didn't see her til high school again. Where she came out of nowhere and attacked me in a hallway. I blacked out after she kicked my shin with a clog shoe and broke the bone but witnesses say I slammed her head into a concrete wall then was punching like a windmill on her. Pent up frustrations. She was a bully. Principal suspended her. I got no punishment. Still have the scar. She tried to be nice to me yrs later but I walked away.
People say it’s character building to be bullied. It sure is - my character is one who is depressed, anxious, no self esteem, zero self worth etc. I’m 51 now. It stays with you, because you are mostly bullied during your formative years when you are developing as a person. If you are told something often enough, you start to believe it
Only bullies say bullying is positive for character building, and that includes parents. "Boys will be boys", "man up", "they only do it because they like you". There are countless excuses to do nothing about it. I hope you're faring a bit better now.
Load More Replies... The worst part is that if someone does defend themselves, they will likely get expelled. I actually went to school with someone who would harass black students and call them the n-word. Multiple students that he did this to beat him up and got expelled. Nothing ever happened to the culprit (aside from getting beaten up). Even going to the principal and defending them accomplished nothing because schools in the south have a zero tolerance policy for violence but a "boys will be boys" policy for abject racism. There were also several suicides at the school. Hoping things are at least a little better then they were 20 years ago.
I got bullied in elementary school. Quite a lot. I hated it. Switching classes didn't help, parents intervention didn't help, switching school helped quite a lot. I was still unpopular, but being unpopular is totally different thing than being bullied, so..it was a kind a relief. Fast forward 24 years. I have returned in my hometown for a visit to mother and grandmother. My former bully became a real estate broker. In a time we were about to sell a property somewhere. He got in contact, totally doesn't remember me. You know what... when you cut down a tree with an axe, the axe doesn't remember a thing, but the tree remembers it all. I didn't let him get this opportunity. Not even after years. Karma? Schadenfreude? Maybe. Or maybe - I can allow myself to be picky now.
I was verbally bullied at school, I told my mum who then talked to my form teacher, her reply... 'oh they are such lovely girls, they wouldn't do that'. My older sister took matters into her own hands and threatened them to leave me alone, they told my form teacher and I got into trouble! At least they left me alone after that. Schools suck at dealing with bullying, they don't want to know.
Sadly, something is going on at home that these kids are bullies. I was a bully when I was younger. Only because I was being bullied at home and watched my father bully my siblings and mother. I was also bullied and picked on in school. I'm sorry that your child has to go through this. It's awful and scary.
The evidence does not back this up. Although it seems like common sense that bullies are somehow "broken" or suffering themselves, this doesn't seem to be accurate.
Load More Replies... I was bullied from the second Kindergarten year till year 8/9. I have been always a caring Person with strong Feelings what is right and wrong and didn't want to do something Bad myself by doing what they did sometimes. So, i was clearly helpless and always had my head down. Bullied differ but Most oft them are more triggered, if you act like a victim (this is Bad and really should Do the opposide, victims should be protected, but this is what i observed) so, what did change the Situation was, to go to self defence classes! I highly reccommend this. Not to be able to kick someones a*s (in the correct fifghting school you learn to Better not fight or hurt someone), but to grow selfesteem! It needs time but you learn to Look like someone who could and would fight for yourself. You feel like you just pretend it but your posture change and this can keep some bullies away. Then, of course there are bullies, who got triggered by people who seem to want to fight. Be careful with this type
And observe if it is better this time to Look down. Another plus to go to selfdefense classes are, that you usually learn to Fall. So when you are good trained and Trip you maybe will automatically roll and don't break your arm because you Fell on it. (my So had an accident with His bike but rolled over and was just finde what other ways could have breaked His Handys, Arms and maybe neck)
Load More Replies... Unfortunately, the one being bullied will be the one punished by the school and said bully gets away with it. Especially if the bully is "on the team" or "parents are rich and/or influential" etc. Sometimes, even the teachers are in on it. Then, the bully will give it to them worse. The outcomes of these situations can be devastating.
I was bullied physically and mentally my entire school career. Much of what was done to me in the '70's and '80's is now called sexual harassment. Nobody gave a damn. In eighth grade, we got to buy class shirts. Every kid was supposed to sign this paper they used for the template. I refused, because I didn't want to ruin everyone's shirt. If I came across a child with that low of self-esteem, I'd have brought it up with the parents. The teachers didn't care. Some of the kids heard me tell a teacher why I hadn't signed it, and started a petition for me to sign the shirt. All but one kid wanted my name on the shirt. Because of the petition, I signed. The bullying from my year group lessened a great deal after that, although the rest of the kids never stopped.
Move. Pull out of school. Homeschool. Or go to a different school do whatever you have to you're doing nothing you should be ashamed find a different school it doesn't matter if you go to the authorities at the school it's already started. Why wait go to a different school
This one s Absolutely 100% UNACCEPTABLE. Bullying may be hard to see, but if a child can count 20+ times in two weeks, then WTF? Teachers, Counselors, & most of all, ADMINISTRATORS HAVE NO EXCUSES. People in these positions Must Make it their business to be on High alert for vulnerable kids.What are you there for if not for protecting the vulnerable?! This is NOT a nuanced problem. Hold the adults AND the bullies accountable! NOW! Finally, fine parents/guardians of bullies. Money talks. Bullies need to be taken Out of schools & everywhee else.
The thing is that the worst bully’s tend to be the most popular kids. The bully’s don’t have self esteem issues The do it because they get away with it. No one, including teachers , pulls them up. There should be policy that starts in the class room., No telling anyone to Shut Up when voicing an opinion, no name calling, NOT ALLOWING THE POPULAR ONES TO HOG THE ATTENTION. Making sure Every child gets a turn at special tasks & most of all EXCLUDING BULLYS FROM FUN ACTIVITIES. Actions must have consequences. Sadly when I was at school the teachers bullied me far worse than the kids did.
Parents don't use the word no anymore and sometimes this is the issue. A teacher tries and if succeeds the student goes and takes it out on another classmate. Bullying. They can also have a strict home and come to school and take it out on other classmates that way. I was bullied from grade school (about grade 2/3) to high school. One girl and her crew that rotated around her but mostly her. In junior high (grade 7-8 and about 11-13 yrs old) it was a slew of different kids. The main bully was two years older and I didn't see her til high school again. Where she came out of nowhere and attacked me in a hallway. I blacked out after she kicked my shin with a clog shoe and broke the bone but witnesses say I slammed her head into a concrete wall then was punching like a windmill on her. Pent up frustrations. She was a bully. Principal suspended her. I got no punishment. Still have the scar. She tried to be nice to me yrs later but I walked away.
82
23