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35 Women’s Behaviors That Females Of This Online Group Can’t Stand And Want Them To Stop
It's no secret that sometimes we find someone very annoying because of weird or disgusting things that they do. Reddit user @u/amethyst015 decided to focus on women only and ask them online what are some of the things that other females do that they find so irritating that they want them to stop doing it. The question that received almost 12k answers had both some very relatable and unexpected responses.
Some of the things mentioned included some practical topics such as leaving a mess in a public toilet. A lot of things noticed were focused on behavioral issues: being rude to your daughter-in-law, faking friendliness, and creating gossip about other women. This thread also showed that some problems have been rooted in our society for quite some time, because some women still mentioned that the thing they wish other women would finally ditch is dieting and creating unrealistic beauty standards.
What were some of the more concerning answers? Users online revealed that they still see other females joining MLM scams and trying to get others involved. But one of the answers that started a whole discussion was about some women who dare to send admiration and even love letters to convicted felons, thinking that they are innocent.
Which one of these things scares you the most? Or maybe you haven’t found the worthy answer to the question “What is something you wish other women would stop doing?” Then don’t forget to leave your answer in the comments down below!
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Shame me for not believing in their own beliefs and look at me weird.
I live in Iran and I'm honestly disgusted to see how some religious females tend to shame other women and accuse them of being s***s. If you think your husband, brother or son may be seduced by seeing my ears and hair **they** are the problem.
I feel this in my bones! I've been shamed my whole life for the way men behave around me. It finally took my husband saying that I could wear a burlap sack and still look sexy for me to realize that I will NEVER be able to control the thought/begaviors/feelings of those around me, so why worry about it. We really need a cultural shift to start teaching our boys/men how to control their own thoughts/behavious/feelings and stop relying on women to do it for them!
Photoshoping their photos to the oblivion thus reinforcing the unrealistic beauty standards. You know skin texture exists, why do you pretend it doesn't??
This is going to get lost in the shuffle but moms who ask their daughters to do more than their fair share of the household chores while the boys skate because they’re “immature.”
**STOP IT**
This is particularly bad among immigrant communities that hail from countries with more…traditional gender roles (basically the Far East, the Mid East, Eastern Europe, Africa and South America) but I know it happens in American households too.
The daughters are fed this garbage about being more mature/responsible so they have to help pick up the slack while the sons are frequently coddled and babied.
It’s infuriating and it’s almost never talked about.
Teenage girls in the US average 8 hours a week more of care taker and household duties than teenage boys. And then those girls grow into women who shoulder the lion share of it in a M/F relationship even when both people work full time outside the home. It's also currently the number 1 reason why women eventually file for divorce in the US. Parents have got to both teach and expect their sons to run households, do chores, etc.
And it does neither any good, the girls are parentified while the boys are unprepared for full adulthood and become a manchild. Age appropriate chores/responsibilities for all to teach life skills while still letting the child be a child.
My mom did this when I was younger - I always questioned why I should be the one to wash the dishes etc whilst my brother got to sit around and do nothing to be told "It's because you're a girl". My brother is now 34 years old and still can't look after himself after years of mollycoddling. I have two sons and will always give them responsibility. I would hate them to grow up like my brother did.
Good for you! As the wife of a man brought up to pull his weight in the house and to understand how it ALL works I can tell you that not only is it good that they can take care of themselves fully, they also make a lovely partner to share life with. My husband's father pulled his weight and between them his parents set a great example. Sounds like you are too 👍👍👍
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I had a therapist tell me once, "Mothers of your mother's generation are conditioned to love their sons and train their daughters." It has to do with preparing their daughters for what they might face in the world, but yet feeling no need to prepare their sons because "they are boys." After thinking on that, I see that is 100% correct. I see that dynamic a lot with women my age. Our mothers were on a mission to impart all of their wisdom and training to us.
And somehow, people still dispute the obvious truth that boys and girls are socialized differently. It's so antiquated and ridiculous.
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Ugh so annoying it happened with me- I do all the work while my nephew (a year older, raised with me since like 7 or 8 years old like my brother) got to do whatever because "You're our daughter and he's our grandson" (I'm a trans guy btw but my parents don't support me). Still annoying to this day.
You know what you get when you allow this? A son who can't wash a dish or pick up laundry.
Then the boys grow up not knowing how to do laundry or cook a meal and expect their wife to coddle them just like mommy did.
Girls tend to be more mature so that's why my son normally had more chores than his sisters since he had what all the kids had to do on top of extras that he "earned" by immaturely goofing off!!
Well, that's a better way of dealing with it than going 'aw, he's too immature' and letting them off! Did it work ultimately? You say 'had' so did he learn it was easier to just do it in the end?
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I’ve already told my husband that I’m training all my kids to cook, clean, fix things, see, etc. Gender be damned, you need to know how to care for yourself and knowing these skills is a big help regardless. In our house even, I take on more of the “male” roles such as handyman and landscaping, while he’s the one who cleans, does laundry because that’s what we’re good at, and we discussed long before marriage how chores would be split.
It's the old principle: People will often rise or fall to meet others' expectations of them. If you think boys are inherently less responsible or mature than girls and you don't expect them to demonstrate responsibility and maturity, then they likely won't, and it has nothing to do with inherent sex differences.
Unfortunately it's not just a cultural thing. It happens in more families than we care to think or notice. When I was about 10 my "step-mom" ( I hate her, she was horrible to me.) kept getting me to help her with her new baby (my half-brother) but never got my other half-brother to help. If I remember correctly I think I asked why my bro wasn't made to help out with the baby stuff. She said it was a "girly thing". I didn't live with them, just stayed for weekend here and there. I'm my mom's only child, and I did a ton of chores growing up because she wanted good housekeeping instilled in me and not have me use my mom as a maid. Knowing my mom that wouldn't change that if I were a son. I'm pretty sure my mom would get me to do more of the heavier housework if I were a boy like how she used my boyfriend and his friends to move furniture for her for free. Now that is something women should stop doing. Just because a male is around doesn't mean he can/will do heavy labour for free.
Oh yes. When I was 8 my younger brother was told to wash the dishes. He said no. Dad said Kate wash the dishes for him.
Our daughter and son had the same chores to do. They swapped the chore each week. It is just as important for boys to learn how to cook, clean and wash as it is for girls! Our son married an adorable young lady who absolutely hates cooking, but is happy to vacuum and clean bathrooms. Our son enjoys cooking and doesn't mind doing the laundry. They've got it all sorted between them. Our daughter is married to a lovely young man who has two sister and couldn't cook to save his life!
I'm a daughter with no brothers and just one sister, but I still observe this. When I go to another person's house where there's a teenage boy, I have to help bring & put away the glasses, plates, etc., even though I'm the guest. I haven't questioned it because that's "rude", according to my family, since the parents of the teenage boy demand I do it. Next time I WILL question it. I AM THE GUEST, NOT THE SERVANT. MAKE YOUR SON DO THOSE CHORES. Or at least ASK me. I'd be more than happy to do it if you asked.
My very Irish-American family did this for generations, treating the boys/men like cute but incorrigible stamps while expecting the girls/women to do everything because "*roll eyes* what can you expect from them?" My cousin and I put an end to that in our generation. What a surprise - my son is a competent, able, responsible man, and my daughter is the same, because I expected the same from them both.
When my boyfriend and I moved in together (45 yrs ago) I found I was doing the cooking AND cleaning up afterwards. I told him "Choose one - cook or clean". He hated washing dishes so he chose to cook. But the only thing he could do is grill a steak. I don't like steak. Not a vegetarian, just don't like steak. It took months of cooking together before he was confident in the kitchen but eventually he would even grocery shop alone!
I am an Easter European, I didn't know I have a different role than boys\lower potential until I went to uni in France, please don't generalise.
My 15 yo son offered to take over all the kitchen tasks from his twin 12 yo sisters because there are 6 people in our household and he feels he should have the most responsibility on his plate. Speaks volumes for his character.
Ummmm. This is bs. My sisters did c**p, and all of my friends sisters got out of chores because they whined about having to do it.
All my kids are required to do the exact same things. 3m, 5m, 7f, of course the 3m does not do it to the standard of 7f. I still make him do it, and yes it takes 10x longer making them do it, but they all need to learn.
I (totally white chick in the US) ran away from home because I was tired of being a live-in nanny. I did most of the cleaning, laundry & cooking for my 3 younger siblings. I also helped with homework & literally went to the Parent/Teacher conferences. My Mom was a single parent with 4 kids & no child support. I get it. But, I AM NOT THEIR PARENT. Stop putting this on 12 year old girls!
I was raised with “it’s a man’s world” as the explanation for my getting tons of household chores to my brother’s none.
Yup, this happened to me when I was growing up. This and plus some other issues have contributed to my brother thinking I'm sort of a joke.
This! Exactly this turned me into a feminist at 9 y.o. and that was 59 years ago. That is when my resistance started, and though it cost me a relationship with my family, no regrets. Don't buy into that bulls**t, and someday we may get there.
that was my childhood. dishes? me. everyone's laundry, yep me. washing floors, scrubbing toilets, you guessed it! i had two younger brothers and one was always praised about how clean he kept his room. i was like HELLO?!! my room would be clean too if i didn't spend every saturday morning as a housekeeper. idiots. until this year - my daughter - who just entered high school - only emptied the dishwasher, and did her own laundry. now she helps with bathrooms. and helps with cooking and the family dog. i was not about to treat her like cinderella. my son, who is 2.5 years younger, cleans the kitchen, handles the recycling and trash. and does whatever i ask him to without an attitude. guess what kind of house my husband ;) grew up in ;)
My dad was raised to do houseshores by our aunt, what got me confused he didn't get to teach it to my half brother and yeah 36 and living with his mom because my dad humiliated him because asked him to share the profits of the van my dad brought him because he kept being fired from his jobs with our sister- half sister single mom. The joke here is we get to an age we can start to realise whose are the one that are on our side in good and bad, and we pay then being 'human' jerks, I say it because the last BB of us always said to my parents how busy she was, so as the oldest of my dad's second marriage I get in charge of many houseshores while she goes out to do nothing related with study *what never annoys me because I feel grateful towards my parents, but at the end of the day I find arrogant her attitude watching how our older half siblings treats our parents*
This is one of many examples of a stereotype which harms women which is promulgated almost entirely by women. How many children do you know that are primarily raised by men?
I have 2 daughters and my friends has 2 boys. The girls and I were visiting at my friend's and as usual she would be complaining about her husband. Meanwhile she is also "serving" her sons. I then told her that I would never want her sons to get together with my daughters as she was raising them so they would be exactly like their dad. We had a long talk and she started changing the way she was raising her boys. A lot of mothers are raising their sons to be a****le. BTW this is in Canada
This made me resent being female. My brothers and I are very close in age. Our aunt from USA came to visit (UK) and she brought my brothers fun things to play with, and she brought me some fancy washing up sponge with a handle where you put washing up liquid, saying it's time I learned to become a housewife. That was bad enough, but after that I had to do the washing up from then on, while my brothers played. Just because I was a girl, because "that's what girls do." I grew up hating being female, and even now, nearly 40 years later, I still often resent being female.
When the architect was planning the kitchen for our new house, he asked my mother if she wanted a dishwasher. "No', she replied, pointing at me and my two brothers. "I've already got three of them."
I saw something about this, it was more homework based but I decided to apply it to chores. Some study recommended no more than 10 min/grade of homework per day. I thought that was a good base for chores. So I modified it a little. 10min/age each week on chores. I figure chores based on how long they take to do without all the complaining they give me. My 5 year old does about 50 min a week of chores, my 13 year old about 2hrs.
this was not the case for me growing up. I had one sister and she was a whiny entitled brat and refused to do anything, so guess who got stuck with it all?
I'm really going to have to keep an eye on that with my kids. My daughter is two years older than my son, so I'm worried I'll just keep it in my head that she's more capable, more responsible and more able to help around the household. That would be unfair towards both of them - kids have to learn to maintain a household growing up or they'll be in for a very rude awakening once they need to take care of themselves. Thank you for this reminder!!!
Stop spreading the myth that these are "traditional". It's "traditional" only in certain times and places. It's traditional for boys and men to go out and hunt. Are the boys doing that while the girls are at home making pottery, building the house and every other implement that needs making? Are the girls fishing and trapping small game, which is very often the traditional activity of women, older girls, and the elderly?
I think it is traditional (unfortunately) in certain times, places and cultures, like the post says. I wish it wasn't.
Load More Replies... Flip it. Instead of woman catering to the slower development of men, have men look to woman to be an example of where the bar is set. Little things make a big difference.
Nobody cares how they got the baby out of the woman - cease this nonsense. You are a parent if you are the primary guardian of a child; gatekeeping based on pain relief, caesareans, adoption, whether you gave birth on dry land or in a pond, honestly, nobody cares. Is the baby ok? Yes. Is the mom ok? Yes. Then it's ok. It's fine. F**k off about breastfeeding too, just feed the kid. Got milk? Fab. Got formula? Fab. Feed the kid.
I don't have children so maybe I am missing out on why women make such a big deal out of this. I have seen my cousins' wives berate another one and say she isn't a "real mom" because she didn't deliver naturally and doesn't breastfeed. I just don't get it. I really thought the only things I needed to care about were these: 1.) is baby healthy; 2.) is momma healthy, and; 3.) when do I get to squeeze the baby? Am I supposed to care about how the baby got to me?
"oh you want kids but your man's not ready yet? Just secretly come off the pill and say it was an accident. It's your body, I did it with my kids". I can't count how many times I've heard this and it's disgusting behaviour
Telling other women that they should have kids, to have a fulfilled life.
Blaming other women for their cheating boyfriend/husband's behavior.
Yeah seriously. It's the cheating partners fault and they deserve all the blame especially if the other person didn't even know they were the other person. I mean yeah it's crappy if they did know but your partner gets the main bulk of the blame still because they made the decision to cheat on you.
Just because you had a hard time climbing up the corporate ladder or getting into a good position, you do not need to make other women suffer the same. I cannot emphasize it enough: hold the door open for the next one. Coach young female leaders. Help each other out
Absolutely yes! Sometimes words of encouragement makes a world of difference. You got this! You can do it! Don't give up!
Teaching their daughters that it's okay to be with an abusive man
This starts when kids are small! When I was in 1st-3rd grade of school there was this boy who would repeatedly kick my over my shins while we were in class and he would "accidently" bump into me pretty violently during recess. When I asked teachers and other adults what I should do they would just smile and tell me that little boys don't understand their feelings so when they like a girl they often behave badly towards her... so yeah. For a while I was led to believe that affection could be shown with violence. Imagine telling that to a victim of domestic violence???? And can you imagine the girls who were told this lie from childhood and who continued to believe it.... can you imagine what sort of love lofe they will accept as adults? Please stop teaching girls that ppl who hurt them do it because they like them. It is NOT ok!!!
Make nice with your daughter in law. Stop being s**tty about her “taking” your son and you’ll be asked to be a part of more that they do.
HAHAHAHAHA! My mother gladly welcomed all of my sisters-in-law and my brother-in-law into the family with open arms. She was practically giddy when the boys said they were getting married. She goes out of her way to make sure that they are welcome and included in all aspects of the family. I think that it is mostly because she had 12 boys and me and she was tired and wanted rid of all of us.
Everything for their sons. Teach them how to do their own laundry. Teach them to cook, give them a night they make dinner for the family. Have them do chores. Make them understand that doing anything less than their share is not enough. Model partnership, not servitude. This simple thing could change the world.
Ugh! I hate this idea that the kitchen is the woman's place and not the man's!!! Since 75% of all chefs are male, why is it OK for a man to cook dinner outside the home but not in it????
Constantly saying/posting “If you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best”. People shouldn’t have to endure you treating them like s**t to earn you treating them nicely. If you need to be “handled” at your worst, you have some self work to do.
Yep. I'll admit that I can be a bit much sometimes, but I am actively working on it. I'm in therapy and it is slowly working, but I would need someone who can be patient with me at times. Not ALL the time and I'm not saying that I would push the envelope, but just don't be like my ex who called me a narcissist because we were arguing and I mentioned my own needs, which he always and consistently put last. THAT, I definitely don't need again.
Stop dating idiot guys when you have kids. Stop putting your love lives before your kids. Put your kids first.
Asking if/when a woman is getting engaged / getting married / having a baby / having another baby / getting back to work after having a baby.
Especially from older female relatives. It just doesn't end.
Being mean to other women in the workplace. Even if we dislike someone, no excuse to go out of your way to be rude and nasty to someone.
“Someone else’s shine does not dim yours”
Faking orgasms! Teaching men false sense of what is good!
Just tell him what you like it's time people accept that penetration doesn't do the trick for most women
Flushing tampons and other period products
Yeah,Ive seen WAY to many of these things and they always muck up the works. Had one clog an air relief valve today.
Fake friendliness. If I don't like you, I won't pretend to like you. Not gonna be a d**k or anything, I'll still be cordial. But I've had women rush up to me all smiles and hugs like "oh my goood you came, I'm SO glad you're here!!" And then find out sometime later that Audrey really does not like me *at ALL*
Keep popping kids with a s***ty partner hoping the babies will fix the relationship
Acting like fellow mothers are the only people who could possibly understand unconditional love, selflessness or sacrifice, work/life balance challenges, the list goes on…
Using their own issues to invalidate other’s issues.
Yeah but my life is sooo much worse so your problems don't matter (§) I hate people who do this; everyone's problems and issues are valid
Taking the criticism of one person as license to stop doing what they love.
"My teacher said my painting was awful, so I swore then and there never to paint again."
"My mom said I was fat, so I have never worn a bikini."
"My boyfriend said my story was stupid, so I quit writing."
You're only hurting yourself. Twirl on the haters.
Hitler had an art teacher that said he couldn't paint .. and look how that turned out ..
Peeing on public toilet seats. Put some TP on the seat if you’re that worried about germs.
Where I work, office full of women and men. The cleaner, a woman, has stated on more than one occasion that the women's toilets are far worse than the men's. One time a nugget of poo was left lying on the floor of a cubicle. Jam rags have also been left on the side in plain sight, no attempt to get rid of them. Even though bins are provided.
Thinking it’s cute & quirky to label themselves as a married man’s “work wife.” My fiancé has been put in several uncomfy situations where he doesn’t want to be mean or deal with an HR blowup, but also doesn’t want to be flirted with in his place of employment. We don’t want men to do it to us, so let’s not do it to uninterested men.
Ugh! We have a woman in my workplace that does this and refers to one particular guy as "Hubby." It is cringey and the guy hates it so much, you can see it on his face every time she walks into the same room as him.
Speaking on behalf of all women. It’s absurd and wildly egotistical.
Workplace toxicity. I have had two women, separate occasions, try to get me fired. The lies and gossip they spread and the accusations were insane. Empathy should be easy for us to have toward one another and I don’t know how a person can do those things to another person, let alone women to women.
Oh Been there and wearing the tee shirt, the best one was telling my very Christian Boss that I was a witch, he made my life hell ...literally.
Targeting married men exclusively. And this is just a small percentage of women but I mean why?
Cheating husbands are trash no exceptions but for some women to not take no as an answer from a happily married man is just sickening.
Protecting abusive and toxic men. Heck even helping them do the awful things they do.
I say light them on fire. I mean, they’re wearing flammable clothing, plus I saw one with a lighter once. It’s like they’re asking for it….
Weird intense dieting.
To be clear, I'm not talking about trying to eat healthier or even trying to lose weight in a healthy way.
I'm talking about the overwhelming number of women I know who go on these bizarre diets with fasts and cleanses and they don't eat carrots or they count how often they poop or ... I dunno. Weird s**t. Then it becomes their entire personality for a while and it's all they talk about.
It always gives me strong vibes of a person who feels out of control in some aspect of their life trying to regain that control in another, and it makes me horribly sad.
Sabotaging other women. Many women are insecure and they’re happy to be friends with another woman AS LONG AS she is not better than them in their opinion. I’m tired of women sabotaging other women they think are more beautiful, successful, and happier than they are. Ladies, we’re all in this together. No one’s life is perfect and we can all help each other be better if we just all stick together.
We should not allow ourselves to indulge in this s**t. Ever heard the words “divide and conquer”? Until we can come together we will not continue to make inroads into all the goodies in life that men have always enjoyed.
Bringing each other down
that applies to everyone, not just women. Actually, most of these do.
Note: this post originally had 46 images. It’s been shortened to the top 35 images based on user votes.
i feel like a lot of these go for all the genders, not just women
How about using the term "females" in a title about things women find annoying. Oh the irony...
Making their opinions on reproductive choices into mandatory decisions for every other woman. I don’t care that you think IUDs cause terminations, you’re perfectly in your rights to decide not to use them or get an actual termination yourself. I’m going to support your choice! But taking my choices away because you don’t approve of them is bad.
It is scary how early some of these behaviors start, as low as age 8 from what I have seen.
I am a woman in a group of friends with all males. Happened cause i joined the boy scouts cause there were no other girls. Now years and years later were not boy scouts anymore but stayed very close. Im married. Still everytime one of the guys gets a girlfriend theyre weirded out that im with them a lot. Ffs we're all around 30. This got blown up so often. Im not some kind of alien or murderer. Im a female friend....
STOP SHAMING WOMEN FOR USING PADS!!! SORRY I DONT WANT TO SHOVE A A STICK OF COTTON UP MY COOCH!!!
Wishing for another woman's life and even telling her so. That is not flattering. It means you need to get your s**t straight. You want to be like me because I am "strong, independent, and happy" okay so be your version of that. Don't model yourself after someone else because you never know how hard the person works to make their life what it is.
Why would I want to read a list of women hating on other women (none of whom should be referred to as "females")?
This is my grief. Please just because you're also female does not mean I want to know about your cycle or it's grossness. Yeah when I had them if a woman needed a tampon or pad I'd help out. But I don't need to know the status of the flow or cramps or any of it. I got my own body to deal with. And also grief is clean up after yourself in stores. Stop making messes for the staff. You don't treat your home like a trash pile don't do it in public. Thankfully someone mentioned the pee all over the toilet because squatters can't sit correctly.
Projecting their own insecurities onto other women. For example, women who struggle with their body image issues are more likely to shame other women for being overweight or too skinny. Also, considering every woman their rival, especially when it comes to their relationship with men. I don't want your mangy boyfriend, calm down.
i feel like a lot of these go for all the genders, not just women
How about using the term "females" in a title about things women find annoying. Oh the irony...
Making their opinions on reproductive choices into mandatory decisions for every other woman. I don’t care that you think IUDs cause terminations, you’re perfectly in your rights to decide not to use them or get an actual termination yourself. I’m going to support your choice! But taking my choices away because you don’t approve of them is bad.
It is scary how early some of these behaviors start, as low as age 8 from what I have seen.
I am a woman in a group of friends with all males. Happened cause i joined the boy scouts cause there were no other girls. Now years and years later were not boy scouts anymore but stayed very close. Im married. Still everytime one of the guys gets a girlfriend theyre weirded out that im with them a lot. Ffs we're all around 30. This got blown up so often. Im not some kind of alien or murderer. Im a female friend....
STOP SHAMING WOMEN FOR USING PADS!!! SORRY I DONT WANT TO SHOVE A A STICK OF COTTON UP MY COOCH!!!
Wishing for another woman's life and even telling her so. That is not flattering. It means you need to get your s**t straight. You want to be like me because I am "strong, independent, and happy" okay so be your version of that. Don't model yourself after someone else because you never know how hard the person works to make their life what it is.
Why would I want to read a list of women hating on other women (none of whom should be referred to as "females")?
This is my grief. Please just because you're also female does not mean I want to know about your cycle or it's grossness. Yeah when I had them if a woman needed a tampon or pad I'd help out. But I don't need to know the status of the flow or cramps or any of it. I got my own body to deal with. And also grief is clean up after yourself in stores. Stop making messes for the staff. You don't treat your home like a trash pile don't do it in public. Thankfully someone mentioned the pee all over the toilet because squatters can't sit correctly.
Projecting their own insecurities onto other women. For example, women who struggle with their body image issues are more likely to shame other women for being overweight or too skinny. Also, considering every woman their rival, especially when it comes to their relationship with men. I don't want your mangy boyfriend, calm down.
