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30 Things That People Thought They Wanted So Much, Yet Regretted After Finally Getting, As Shared In This Online Group
The human mind is a strange thing, especially when it comes to our desires. They can arise completely spontaneously, occupying all our time - and then, when we finally achieve what we wanted, it suddenly turns out that the main joy was not so much from possession, but actually from the desire to possess.
So it turns out that over the years of our life, we have collected a whole lot of various things that once seemed absolutely necessary, and now we don’t even have a clue what to do with them. It's really like a suitcase without a handle - so hard to carry, such a shame to throw away. Yes, these are mind games, there's no denying it.
There is a popular thread on Reddit where people talk about different things they once thought they wanted, but really regretted afterwards. More than 12.7K upvotes and almost 8.4K comments suggest this topic is very close to people.
Bored Panda has compiled a curated list with the most popular and really ingenious things from this discussion. We strongly suppose you'll be interested in reading and watching - and, perhaps, will also have something to share.
More info: Reddit
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A backyard pool.
I always wanted one until I had one.
It was a huge pain in the a**. Had to buy chemicals, had to test the water, had to clean it, found dead snakes in the skimmer baskets, had to get the pump replaced, etc.
I agree with what several commenters have said. If you can afford to have someone do the work for you then it's something really nice to have. If you can afford the mortgage on the house with the pool but still mow your own lawn, clean your own house, etc. The pool is likely to be more trouble than it's worth.
I bought a collection of lockdown gym equipment I had all good intentions for. It turns out a lack of free time wasn’t really the reason I wasn’t ripped.
Being an adult...
As a child I couldn't wait to grow up. As a working adult, I couldn't wait to retire and I'm finding it isn't what I had hoped. It is easy to focus on the what you will gain in the next phase of your life, but you don't realize what you will lose. Just enjoy the good things in each day.
Marine fish tank. They look absolutely gorgeous when clean and running well however I didn't bank on how difficult it would be to have it clean and running well..
Ex husband had one of these. I really didn't want a small section of ocean in the living room, OK. A year later: SO MUCH MONEY. SO MANY DEAD FISH. SO MUCH FREAKING OUT OVER MONEY AND DEAD FISH. Then he got into reptiles.
Taking out student loans to achieve a degree that will never pay me enough to pay back the student loans.
Anyone in the US that reads this. Very few professions care about what school you went to. Or even physical locations. The few I can think of are doctors, hyper specific job that are also based at MIT, ect. For everything else. Get your generals done through a community college. History and math 101 are the same there as they are at Harvard only way cheaper. Do as much online as possible. And if you are still in highschool. See what programs/classes your school offers that will count as college credits. If you stack your classes right you could walk out of HS with an associates degree. Also also, once you start the Bachelor's degree things at least get funner. They are classes you care about. Because they are in the field you are interested in.
Working a job that involves skills from one of my hobbies. Now it feels more like work than the hobby.
I found the opposite to be true. I'm a metal fabricator that I started as a hobby. I now do it for a living and now I have access to equipment that I would never have been able to afford let alone have room for. I have also become so much better (there's so many people who are better than me) than I would have if I had kept it just a hobby
A business. Supposedly my dream job….but I haaaate it.
Yes, I own a bakery that I’ve run for 13 years. It’s successful, always paid its bills….but it’s definitely zapped the joy out of a hobby. Anyone that has worked with the public knows it’s taxing. I’ve lost the creative aspect and just feel like a slave to it honestly. Bakery hours can be rough, so maybe it’s the lack of sleep catching up to me, lol. I just know that I was already feeling burned out, but now with the insane increase to costs of supplies - and the unpredictability of finding certain things altogether, I’ve decided this will be my last year in business.
This is sad. I wonder if finding a different way to structure the business would be better. Such as making products upon order. So you have a menu of a few products that can be made with a more limited ingredients list and get customers to place a order for that product to be made and ready for pick up. That way ready-made products aren't going to waste. I always wonder how much of the products I see in bakeries get sold.
Being single
I’m a 25 y/o gay male that was dating an older man. We had a great life together. I thought I wanted to be single because I needed the experience of living on my own/having other partners, but now realizing I lost something truly special. It’s hard learning to date again
The experience of living alone is a valuable one to have, if you are fortunate enough to be in a position to manage it. It's possible to have that experience and still be in a committed relationship though.
Go pro.
I don’t even go on a picnic. What the f**k did I need a go pro for.
Buying a new ski boat. Expensive, too big to keep in the garage and burned $80 in gas in an afternoon (when gas was still affordable). Mostly I pulled the kids and their friends on wake boards or kneeboards around and around in circles while the air temperature was close to 100 and came home dehydrated and with a headache. A happy day is when you buy a boat. A happier day is when you sell that b***h.
To get off my meds. Did. Was absolutely terrible . Went back on them probably for the rest of my life
Waterbed. Biggest waste of money. Spent 1k on the most uncomfortable bed ever. Practically broke my back and sold it for 100 after just a year of using it.
Nose ring. Once I got it, it just felt like I had a booger in my nose that I couldn’t get rid of
My art degree from a private institution. It’s “nationally accredited“ which means its useless
I won't have to work another day in my life!
I became disabled in 2019
I can't understand this attitude. I, unfortunately was forced into disability myself. My culinary career was my entire life. I would get up in the morning, dress and head off to work. I would spent the entire day, often until late at night there, go home, shower, go to bed and wake the next morning to gladly start it all over again. This was my way of life and I adored it. My health improved a bit, so I began volunteering in one of the local kitchens cooking for the homeless. Last summer alone I put in over 100 hours for them and others and was happy as a clam again. Things have taken a bit of a downturn again, but I still look for ways to help.
Massage chair. I enjoyed the demo in the shop, that's about it.
an open relationship
My husband and I agreed to having an open relationship. It was one of the WORST decisions I ever made. If anyone is contemplating trying an open relationship, DON'T!
A house in the country. Was fun at first, have land, can do what I want. But now it’s a pain to get anything serviced on the house, deliveries take longer, and it’s a pain to go grocery shopping or just into town in general. And the upkeep on the land is now a time waste, and sometimes I just want someone to deliver me pizza! Moving into town this summer.
I found a good compromise : living in a medium city, working at the country. Both benefits: able to find peace and calm on my daywork, and everything I need in the evening. But it's France, a human sized country
A friend-with-benefits. I thought it would be fun and effortless but definitely not. He told me sweet things in the beginning saying he could see it being more, I fell for it quickly like an amateur
Then we had sex. Afterwards he’s playing hot and cold and my feelings are on a roller coaster of “what is happening??” Says he just wants to be strictly fwb and not pursue anything more but is still interested in me. *Then* he says he’s not interested in being friends anymore either. Maybe I was too clingy after the initial sweet words, maybe he wasn’t ever truly interested in anything but a one night thing but either way my head was spinning. I have never doubted myself more. I just wish he would have been more decisive on what he wanted.
Wonderful guy, wish nothing but the best for him but whew, hell of a week. No more fwb for me lmaoo.
I've had two friendships that included benefits. They were both great. But it is a decision that must be agreed to by both people. And it must be totally understood that the relationship will not grow to anything more than a friendship. Don't participate if your friend is someone with whom you think you might fall in love. And don't become jealous if your friend has sex with another. The key is to remember that you're friends, nothing more. Friendships are often longer lasting and more important than "romantic" relationships. Keep that in mind if you think you may want to have a friend with benefits. Because if it doesn't work, you may lose a valuable partnership that you'll regret for years.
I had several fwb and the first rhing I've said is "not interested in a deeper relationship in any shape or form, tou are not my consolation prize until 'the one' appears." So far is been good, treat people with respect and don't lie for sex. Don't make promises you would not fulfill.
I've had several "casual relationships" over the years. I wished them well when they found "the love of their life" and held their broken heart when it wasn't. When I found my "one love" that was it, I was done, as was he. They had all helped make me into the person that he fell in love with.
This doesn't sound like fwb. This sounds like she wanted something more and he didn't. Fwb could be awesome as long as no romantic feelings are involved (it usually end up being messy). I had one awesome fwb once, had great sex as we could talk about what we genuinely liked with no feelings in the way. Just don't expect all that extra romantic "fluff". That is for partners.
I have no personal experience, but I've seen plenty of posts before taking about how nice it is to hug and cuddle with their fwbs. I'm not really sure what you mean by "romantic fluff" but I'm sure the experience varies.
Load More Replies...I came very close to having one of these with a guy in my 20's. He was one of my best friends.. I was very platonically in love with him but I chickened out the last minute because I knew things would never be the same with us. He ended up meeting a girl who was extremely jealous of our close friendship and he was forbidden from hanging out with me anymore. That hurt me enough..I can't imagine how much worse it would"ve felt if had slept with him.
I had a FWB for a couple of years but it was sort of like this incident. While I was separated, I met my FWB and fell in love with him, too. He was ALWAYS upfront about his feelings for me (he cared deeply but was not in love) but let me know it was because his wife had cheated on him while he was in Afghanistan. He turned out to be the love of my life and leaving him was unimaginably painful, but we agreed to move on. I still think of him and hope he's ok. He has pretty bad PTSD. He moved to FL. I still love him and always will.
Sounds like a predatory kind of person....tell you sweet nothings and as soon as you hit the hay....over and on to the next....you might feel differently about it years from now
You can be friends with & sexually attracted to someone without wanting to date them. As long as both people are on the same page this can be a great thing. Not everyone wants to be celibate between relationships. Some people are ok with one night stands but some people aren't comfortable with that. "Friends with benefits" is great for people who aren't comfortable hooking up with strangers.
I've had FWB situations that lasted for years and were fine because neither one of us did that c**p. There wasn't the sweet, romantic talk, we someone's would go out to dinner or see a movie, but it was as friends. There was no expectation that it would turn into more. Unfortunately, men seem to think they HAVE to say the romantic stuff and lead women on in order to get sex, when in reality, a lot of women would be fine with FWB so long as they don't do all of that!
Seems to me he just wanted one thing and kinda played you until he got it a few times then his true colors came out. Hope u find what ur lookin for tho
Definitely wasn't a friends with benefits! If you can agree to sex with a friend nothing changes but the sex you decide when to start and when to stop! I did it and I loved it! Mostly because sex was a phone call away and didn't need the hubbub of a relationship
Mine was the opposite, I thought it'd be a good way for me to cool off and step outside of my comfort zone after a terrible 7 year relationship, but he became clingy and over emotional when I didn't want another relationship. I ended up breaking his heart and it felt awful.
Realising you have been used is the worst feeling you could ever have. I found out when my FWB i was dating told me his wife WILL be a Virgin when he marries. No More FWB
not a wonderful guy, he found a way to place blame on you for his manipulation.
I’ve had a few friends w/benefits. Worked out perfectly. No hard feelings when it was over on either side. U just need to understand the rules going in.
If she (?) thinks there's going to be more bc she's being led on, that's... Not a fwb relationship 😅
VANESSAQMARTIN.COM helps guide you what to say when a man offers only this option to share his company.
You need to value yourself more and not put up with nonsense. Unfortunately it takes most of us until 50 and a lot of bad relationships to develop the necessary self-esteem to not accept less than what we are worth.
Had the same thing happen to me. You didn't do anything wrong. Some people are just idiots.
Maybe if you had been more decisive on what you wanted....you could have kicked him to the curb soonwr and saved yourself a week of emotional trauma. Guy was acting like a total jerk!
I believe you misunderstand FWB. It sounds like you actually like him. While he was merely aiming for an actual FWB or a One Night Stand.
I've gone though life like that. I'm single, graying and still have FWBs. It seems the poster is too invested in that arrangement. It's not a "relationship" like you would share your life. There is zero commitments on both parties to be "present".
FwB can be a thing, but you need to look at sex like I do: as sex. It's not love, it's an action. If you have two different viewpoints of what sex is, this is what happens.
FwB is a kind of relationship- you can't deny that. And in each relationship you have to communicate your needs clearly Had some guys just wanted occassionaly pure sex dates- more the benefits than the Friends and some that wanted more the friends than the benefits-just didn't worked out. But I really found a few guys and girls too that got in a deeply connected friendship and benefits worked out fantastic too One of them got married now with a good friend of mine and I just love it to watch them grow and glow together
He's not a wonderful guy. He's a jerk that fed you a line, used you until he got bored, then left. There are some people who can do FWB but not many. In the true sense of the phrase, it's agreed on & understood by both parties that neither of us want more than a friendship but we are sexually attracted to one another & enjoy a romp together now & then. Nothing more.
Had plenty of friends with benefits in another life. Some were good, some were bad, but some I really enjoyed and I wish them all the best.
No! I for instance had one with a former flatmate (when we no longer shared flat), while we both we're single and craved human touch (and hated ons) however already knew each other well enough to know that we weren't a good match for real
Load More Replies...The job I am currently in. The work is alright, but the company is s**t.
"The hours are pretty good, but now you come to mention it, most of the actual minutes are pretty lousy.”
When I was a kid, I was insistent on having a ketchup and mustard sandwich. I begged my mom to make it for me. My rationale was if a hamburger was delicious on a bun with ketchup and mustard, surely a sandwich minus the meat would be great. My Mom finally made the sandwich. I immediately regretted it.
Same with begging for Bakers unsweetened chocolate. How is it good enough in cookies but not on it's own?
This girl, thought she was nice, got to know her, turns out she has the personality of sandpaper
Sometimes you won't realize exactly how beautiful someone is until you get to know them. Beauty on the inside turns into beauty on the outside.
To live near family, instead of moving somewhere better. We haven't had two nice days in a row since October here. It is always raining, snowing, cold enough to kill you, incredibly windy, or just unpleasant out because of the resulting days before it. (Upstate NY near the Canada border.) Everywhere has issues, but damn, I just want to be outside in 70 degrees without taking a vacation.
As long as I'm away from them, I'll take any kind of weather. I live in a place with two weeks of summer, but at least I'm not even within driving distance.
That 2 lb novelty Reese Cup. I regretted how good it was.
I don't like Reese's and I don't like peanut butter. I've been called a freak.
A $1200 versace watch to impress a girl that I met off Facebook that I never ended up meeting in real life
Anyone impressed by an expensive watch is not someone I want to know.
Nickelodeon Video Now. I paid $70 for one and two discs. Then Video Now Color came out just a few months later and made it obsolete.
I still have mine! I only ever had one disk that played 2 episodes of spongebob, but I watched those two episodes like 10 times a day as a child. I randomly find it sometimes and it surprisingly still works great
Note: this post originally had 36 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.
I think having a lawn can be on this list. The time, money, energy and water that is needed for a lawn (especially a front lawn) is such a waste. We now have mulch with a pathway going through it with some perennials and a couple bushes. Looks so much better and it is so much easier to maintain. So much less wasted water.
Our "lawn" is a mix of several types of clover, wildflowers, and various mosses. I think it's beautiful, and it requires no maintenance except occasional mowing (and we always leave a patch unmowed for pollinators). It's always the first "lawn" to be green in the Spring while the fertilized, manicured lawns of neighbors are still brown.
Load More Replies...Having is not so pleasing a thing as wanting.It seems illogical but it is often times true.
Mines would definitely be an Echo Dot. All my friends were talking about it so I decided to get one. Lights turn on during conversations for no reason and it made me paranoid it was listening lol. It’s now unplugged and not been used for months
Nope,I don't need nor want any of that. I have something like that on my phone and the first thing I did was disable it.
Load More Replies...What I regret is getting my earlobes pierced with a piercinggun at the jewelry store at the age of 16 instead of with a needle at the piercing shop. I'm now almost 32 and even though I have had earrings for half my life now, it never healed properly. I still sometimes experience inflammation. And on one side if I don't wear any earring in it for more than a week it will have actually partially closed. The skin trauma from getting pierced with a gun is really so bad it can leave lasting problems. I also advise parents who want to give their daughters earrings to not get them done with a gun. Go to a good piercing shop and get them done with a needle. It's actually less painful and doesn't give skin trauma.
number 23, she says "he was a wonderful guy" even though he played with her feelings🙄🙄🙄
Technically life has a return policy. At some point death comes for everyone and the world will keep spinning without you just as it did before you were born. No need to commit suicide. You can just wait it out. After some time on earth it will happen anyway. Best to make the most of it before that happens. Enjoy life a little. Make friends. Follow ambitions. Enjoy good meals. Maybe travel a bit. Life is maybe quite pointless. But that doesn't mean it's pointless to be a good person and do right by others and yourself.
Load More Replies...How about all those bikes people bought during lockdown? The greenway is right behind me, and, as soon as things started opening up people stopped biking. Now there are tons sitting in garages. I regret buying a device that makes my Android Auto wireless. Still need a charger, and, my new car really isn't set up for having a wireless charger easily.
I thought I wanted a full time job with health benefits and company pension. It turns out what I actually want is casual employment with the freedom to say no to any shift I don't want to work, and the freedom to do whatever I want when I get out of bed in the morning. I don't need health benefits from work because we have free health care. I don't need a company pension because I'm good with my money and I know how to save it properly. Having had COVID for the last whole month has really shown me how much I value my freedom, hobbies, and time with my dog.
So basically you want to be independently wealthy... must be nice.
Load More Replies...FITBIT WATCH! The thing would never sync to my phone. It's now a nice addition to the junk drawer.
One of my great regrets in life is not taking over my Uncles' shop in Westwood, NJ (J&J Stationary, if any of you out there remember it). But I know that if I had, I would have regretted doing it, because I'm not the type of person who can get up every day, open a store, work all day, close it, go home, and feel rewarded by it. I would have hated it. So I regret not doing it, even though I know I would have regretted doing it.
Spicy Chicken BBQ | Chicken Barbeque | Eid special recipe https://youtu.be/VP5lm_f0RgU
I think having a lawn can be on this list. The time, money, energy and water that is needed for a lawn (especially a front lawn) is such a waste. We now have mulch with a pathway going through it with some perennials and a couple bushes. Looks so much better and it is so much easier to maintain. So much less wasted water.
Our "lawn" is a mix of several types of clover, wildflowers, and various mosses. I think it's beautiful, and it requires no maintenance except occasional mowing (and we always leave a patch unmowed for pollinators). It's always the first "lawn" to be green in the Spring while the fertilized, manicured lawns of neighbors are still brown.
Load More Replies...Having is not so pleasing a thing as wanting.It seems illogical but it is often times true.
Mines would definitely be an Echo Dot. All my friends were talking about it so I decided to get one. Lights turn on during conversations for no reason and it made me paranoid it was listening lol. It’s now unplugged and not been used for months
Nope,I don't need nor want any of that. I have something like that on my phone and the first thing I did was disable it.
Load More Replies...What I regret is getting my earlobes pierced with a piercinggun at the jewelry store at the age of 16 instead of with a needle at the piercing shop. I'm now almost 32 and even though I have had earrings for half my life now, it never healed properly. I still sometimes experience inflammation. And on one side if I don't wear any earring in it for more than a week it will have actually partially closed. The skin trauma from getting pierced with a gun is really so bad it can leave lasting problems. I also advise parents who want to give their daughters earrings to not get them done with a gun. Go to a good piercing shop and get them done with a needle. It's actually less painful and doesn't give skin trauma.
number 23, she says "he was a wonderful guy" even though he played with her feelings🙄🙄🙄
Technically life has a return policy. At some point death comes for everyone and the world will keep spinning without you just as it did before you were born. No need to commit suicide. You can just wait it out. After some time on earth it will happen anyway. Best to make the most of it before that happens. Enjoy life a little. Make friends. Follow ambitions. Enjoy good meals. Maybe travel a bit. Life is maybe quite pointless. But that doesn't mean it's pointless to be a good person and do right by others and yourself.
Load More Replies...How about all those bikes people bought during lockdown? The greenway is right behind me, and, as soon as things started opening up people stopped biking. Now there are tons sitting in garages. I regret buying a device that makes my Android Auto wireless. Still need a charger, and, my new car really isn't set up for having a wireless charger easily.
I thought I wanted a full time job with health benefits and company pension. It turns out what I actually want is casual employment with the freedom to say no to any shift I don't want to work, and the freedom to do whatever I want when I get out of bed in the morning. I don't need health benefits from work because we have free health care. I don't need a company pension because I'm good with my money and I know how to save it properly. Having had COVID for the last whole month has really shown me how much I value my freedom, hobbies, and time with my dog.
So basically you want to be independently wealthy... must be nice.
Load More Replies...FITBIT WATCH! The thing would never sync to my phone. It's now a nice addition to the junk drawer.
One of my great regrets in life is not taking over my Uncles' shop in Westwood, NJ (J&J Stationary, if any of you out there remember it). But I know that if I had, I would have regretted doing it, because I'm not the type of person who can get up every day, open a store, work all day, close it, go home, and feel rewarded by it. I would have hated it. So I regret not doing it, even though I know I would have regretted doing it.
Spicy Chicken BBQ | Chicken Barbeque | Eid special recipe https://youtu.be/VP5lm_f0RgU