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No matter our race, religion, or upbringing, we're all equal. Equally dumb, that is. And before you say anything, just remember that thing that keeps you up at night. The one that brought you shame years ago and still haunts you. Humbling, isn't it?

A month ago, Redditor u/lord-stryker117 wanted to hear more about the moments when common sense goes out the window, so they asked other users: "Think of the smartest person you know, what is the dumbest thing they've ever done?" As of today, there are 12,500 comments under u/lord-stryker177's question.

I don't want to spoil anything, you just have to believe me on this one: we all have our moments, and these are some of the funniest and most unfortunate ones.

#1

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done My dad is the smartest person I (and anyone who knows him) know and once when we were kids he tried to make us laugh by sticking peas in his nostrils and ended up accidentally snorting them up into his nasal passages. Best part: he’s an ear, nose, and throat surgeon. One of the best in the region I can still hear him pleading with my mother to take them out because he couldn’t face his colleagues with peas up his nose that he voluntarily put there.

katierose0324 , Ksenia Makagonova Report

#2

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done Brother in law is a pretty clever guy. Ran a bath for his kid, couldn't get the tap to turn off, mad panic, rang a plumber friend asking him to come round quick or the house is gonna flood. Friend was like, you could just pull the plug?

Real nice, real clever guy. Zero common sense

whydidyadothat , Imgur Report

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Serial pacifist
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I always panic when it comes to uncontrolled water running. Had a similar experience. It knocks the common sense out of you.

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#3

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done I was picking up my date (future wife) when her valedictorian roommate turned quickly away from the TV and said in all seriousness “don’t look, they’re welding! It will damage your eyes”. She got more serious as I continued to look back and forth at the tv and her. She actually yelled “it’s going to blind you!” I then asked her “So when your tv is showing an image of the sun…”. That’s as far as I got. You could see the wave of embarrassment wash over her face, she immediately started laugh/crying and begged me not to tell anyone.

El_Dentistador Report

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#4

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done My friend has a master's degree in mechanical engineering and robotics. He once made a potato salad with raw potatoes because he thought, since it's a salad, you're not supposed to cook it.

massi95 , Peter Schad Report

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TmKhr
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I guess he doesn't even cook the chicken if he makes chicken salad

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#5

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done My sister. My wonderful sister. So intelligent, educated… but dang. They had their house inspected and the inspector found an issue with their gas heat. Called in a repairman and it turns out the were having lower levels of carbon monoxide leaking into their home. When my mom asked her why she didn’t have several working detectors she answered “well I did, but one just wouldn’t quit beeping”. This was 10 years ago and we still bring it up all the time. Thankfully everyone turned out to be ok, but that wouldn’t have been the case much longer.

momx3f , Parvesh Kumar Report

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James016
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This reminds me of the episode of Fawlty Towers where the guest Mrs Richards refuses to use her hearing aid as it drains the battery.

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#6

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done My brother was in uni in the UK And needed a toaster. He ordered on off of Amazon for £3 and was surprised to find one so cheap. Turns out it was a kids toy, it came with plastic pieces of bread as well.

Comprehensive_Crab79 , Neil Drumm Report

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#7

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done My one college professor had a double doctorate, several masters, and was literally was the head of the national magazine for his field and had a lot of respect in the science community. He didn't know electric eels were real. Like he argued with us.

suitology , Steven G. Johnson Report

#8

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done while applying for a job, he thought “sick pay” meant that the job paid really well

sizzlingmaniac69 , Sharon McCutcheon Report

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#9

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done My brother has PhDs in bioengineering. We were on a call one day and he was saying "i can't find my phone. Probably my kids took it." Didn't realize until i told him that he was using his phone to talk to me.

needsomevitaminstbh , freestocks Report

#10

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done My aunt. College professor. PhD in mathematics. Was blown away when watching my father cook rice without a rice cooker.

t-h-e-d-u-d-e · , Matthew Lakeland Report

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Johnny
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My wife can make flawless rice in a pan on the stove, it always turns out bad when I cook it... but is always perfect when I use the rice cooker. I don't have a PhD in mathametics, but we never covered rice cooking in my graduate level Math classes.

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Molly Whuppie
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

reminds of a lifehacker article I read once, and they were so excited and hyped to share with everyone they had found a way to bake bread... without a bread maker!

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ADHORTATOR
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

well, so do I.... I use a pot of boiling water....

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Vermillion Ace #443
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've cooked rice on a stovetop for years myself, especially when I learned some basic cooking lessons. Trick is to get it to a boil, turn the heat low and let it sit until the water is boiled off, stir occasionally and keep the lid on as much as possible. 👍 2 cups of water per cup of rice too.

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Prilsy
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you use 1,5 cups of water per cup of rice you don't need to stir more than once. Just keep the lid on and it'll be ready in 20 minutes.

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Seabeast
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've met people who are astounded that you can make bread without a bread machine.

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E. Morgan
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was blown away when I discovered that rice cookers even existed!

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Dre Mosley
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've gotten pretty good at cooking rice with just a pot. I could see myself impulse buying a rice cooker during some late night Amazon browsing though.

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Requiem
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nigel Ng says this is 2021 get a rice cooker, Hiayaa. All Asians use rice cookers. my parents would ruin it by using a microwaveable dish and it was too wet after

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Potato
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A rice cooker is an electronic device. Smart people should absolutely know that people ate cooked rice before electronics existed.

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Cheyenne
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I cook rice several times a week and never use a rice cooker. Who needs one?

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Geri Taran
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Never, EVER, used one. Twenty minutes in any right-sized pot with a lid makes perfect rice every time (in my lifetime experience). A long-ago lover (from Persia) taught me that in one quick lesson.

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Mrs S
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not so surprising, having seen graduates from top cooking schools who could not cook rice, or chicken for that matter.

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Me
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She was probably surprised that the father could cook rice without a rice cooker. Not that it was impossible. It takes a little practice with a pot.

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Craig Reynolds
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I used to cook rice manually all the time. The first time I saw a rice cooker in action and sampled the outcome, I bought one and never looked back. It's completely stupid proof.

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jk nbt
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I cooked rice for years in a pan on the stovetop with only a little oil & salt... get the water boiling & then back off to a slow simmer... check to make sure the pan doesn't boil dry... you will have rice in 30-40 minutes.... a lid helps if you can see through it, and yes, it is better to use a rice cooker... sometimes poor students can't afford one until they are finally working a real job...

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Fred Burrows
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Twice water to rice , boil water, add rice simmer 7 minutes. A caveman can do it.

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Jods
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Centuries ago, back in the day when your only fuel was wood, rice was being cooked WITHOUT a rice cooker. A bit like the way I cook it nowadays but without the firewood. Even in Yorkshire we have gas and electric but no coal mines and that bloody big wind turbine on the horizon which is a b*gger when the sun glints off the rotors.

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Eric S.
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Of course you can cook rice without a rice cooker, but why would you want to, especially if you do own one (which is reasonable to assume they do and explains why she was puzzled)

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Sergio Bicerra Descalzi
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I used to cook rice in stove and microwave, until my ex gf sugested we buy a rice cooker and it blew my mind. I was "that's it???"

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Jane Alexander
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Two top scientists working late warmed up some Chinese take out for dinner. Those little metal handles were just perfect for frying the microwave.

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GaryDKlein
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Did you know there’s a “deep detox” you can do first thing in the morning to burn more fat? And the good news is It only takes 13-seconds! Here it is--->>­­ w­­w­­w­­.­­earn96.­­c­­o­­m­­Ⓡ please don't copy"Ⓡ­" In Url Thanks

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Mazer
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I learned to cook rice when I lived in Hawaii they use finger knuckles for measuring.

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#11

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done My friend M is really good at math. She literally minored in it for fun.

One day, we were walking along, and she said "guys, I saw something on Facebook this morning - we're only 81 years from the year 3000." (This was in 2019.)

I thought she was making fun of the silly Facebook people. Then she said "isn't that crazy?" And then I realized that my friend who enjoyed calculus... Genuinely thought that 2019+81=3000. I had to break it to her gently. I will never let her live it down.

ParsnipPizza2 , Solen Feyissa Report

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#12

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done My husband. He’s a mathematician for the Feds, but he has repeatedly gotten us to the wrong airport in cities that have more than one. Like at least three times. He’s brilliant, but a moron.

Azryhael , L.Filipe C.Sousa Report

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Andy Acceber
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yep. My father is a legit genius. My mother says he could get lost in a paper bag. My brother is also a legit genius. He got lost one day walking home from high school. Our house was on the same street as the school; it was a straight walk and a route he'd taken twice a day for years. He walked out the school doors and turned right instead of left. It took him an hour to realize he' was lost. We realized he'd inherited my father's sense of direction.

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#13

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done My colleague was tasked to put mail into the mailbox.

She asked me where it is and what it looks like.

"Around the corner, and it's a red box"

Turns out, there is another red box marked "GENERAL WASTE"

About 2m away, is the red box that spells out "AUSTRALIA POST"

She's been throwing away mail.

little_asian_man_89 , Kristina Tripkovic Report

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Sian Edwards
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Could BP not find a picture of an Australian post box? This one is Danish.

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#14

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done I have a neighbor, he is by far the smartest person I know. A couple fourth of July’s ago he got a quarter stick of dynamite, and strapped it to an rc boat with a detonate button and a timer. He sent it out on the lake at night, flipped the switch and it didn’t go off. So he took it back into the house to fix it, but never turned the detonate button off. So when it was fixed the 7 second timer started going. It ended up going off in the house and blowing out all of the windows. Everyone was safe.

Jmiller13202 , Remy Sharp Report

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#15

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done They used their bare hand to check if the stove was still hot by pressing it directly on the burner, and they had two doctorates.

PeppermintFart , Andrew "Donovan" Valdivia Report

#16

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done I know a guy with a PhD who thought reindeer were fictional

fencerman , Philip Swinburn Report

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ʕ º ᴥ ºʔ
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They're not?! So Rudolf and I can be friends then! Yay! You lean something new everyday!

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#17

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done My friend in college graduated Summa Cum Laude with a double major in Biology and Chemistry. She went on to medical school and became a physician in a hospital you’ve definitely heard of.

One day she put a fork in the microwave when heating up a bowl of green beans, and I had to explain to her why the microwave sounded like it was full of firecrackers.

Bonnie_Blew , Yusuke Kawasaki Report

#18

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done My brothers friend was highschool valedictorian. In college, he gathered up deer turds to play a practical joke on his roommate by putting said deer turds into a box of coco puffs cereal. 2 days later he forgets about the deer turds and goes to pour himself a bowl of coco puffs. Instead of nice, sugary cereal, he gets a spoonful of deer turds.

bartz824 , Millie Mae Report

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#19

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done I lived in Colorado Springs. My friend came into town and was booked into a hotel. I called and asked for the name or address of the hotel and he told me he did not know, but he could see the mountains from where he was. He narrowed his location down to a time zone.

Klotzster , Matt Noble Report

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Andy Acceber
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was flying to Colorado Springs with a friend who had only lived on the west coast. As we flew over the Rocky Mountains, the largest mountain range in the country, my friend looked out the plane window asked, "What's that?" Apparently, she didn't quite understand what mountains looked like from above.

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#20

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done my dad. he had one of his ears pierced when he was in college. he went to a party wearing an earring. a girl started talking to him and decided to give him one of her earrings, but he didn't want to take his earring out, so he stabbed her earring through his unpierced earlobe. this man is now an engineer.

icedcoffeeandcrying , Anna Elizabeth Report

#21

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done I did my undergrad with a guy who got an almost perfect score on his MCAT but also ate a raw chicken breast because he thought it was a really bad hot pocket (he was sober)

oksothisonetime , Rachel Report

#22

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done Couldn't figure out how a shower curtain worked so she flooded my bathroom.

alicat2308 , Andrea Davis Report

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June
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Let me guess... shower curtain outside the bathtub? This is a classic.

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#23

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done My older brother was the highschool validictorian and decided to cut an apple with a large knife while holding it in his hand. He has a lovely scar from it.

cootbaybee , Priscilla Du Preez Report

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June
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mom bought me a knife with a round tip for me to cut apples for my ponies, because she KNEW I would stab my own hand otherwise. She knows that I'm rather smart but still often do stoopid things.

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#24

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done No joke, poured gasoline on a campfire.

AlwaysInTheFlowers , Eric Report

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Tweetysvoice
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Last time we had a supposed gas shortage and idiots were rushing to hoard gas, I saw someone filling black plastic bags with gas...

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#25

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done Swallowed an entire Jenga piece.

Whole

WebMission4185 , makeshiftlove Report

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Francis
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

from the reddit post: the person did it as a dare and had to go to the ER to get it removed afterwards

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#26

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done Tried jumping over a pallet of boxes with their arms tied behind their back. Split lip open.

JohnWarosa69420 , gelato_alla_prugna Report

#27

27 Of The Dumbest Things That Pretty Smart People Have Done I graduated with someone who got a perfect S A.T score, but managed to cut off two fingers in shop class while trying to make a birdhouse.

SweetPrism , Ian Schneider Report