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“What Horrid Secrets Do Your Parents Have, And Are Oblivious To You Being Aware Of?” (24 Answers)
Growing up, you've always looked at your parents as if they were these pure and innocent puffballs. No parent could do anything evil in their children's eyes – however, when those children grow up and begin assessing things with their somewhat world-molded mindsets, the pink glasses get put aside. You realize that your parents are humans with real emotions, scars and their own personalities, just like you are.
Some might've experienced past traumas; some deal with anxieties that they've actively been trying to hide from you, and as it turns out, more than some have secrets – it's just a matter of how intense those secrets are.
Someone on Reddit asked fellow users: "what horrid secrets do your parents have and are oblivious to you being aware of?". The post received almost 20.5K upvotes and 9.3K worth of comments where people took turns exposing their parents' deepest and darkest secrets. Do you think you know your parents well?
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Not some horrid secret, but I sometimes hear my dad talking behind closed doors to my mom who passed away suddenly years ago. He typically tells her our life updates and that he misses her. My sister got married recently and I overheard him from outside his room telling my mom how beautiful my sister looked and how great her husband is that she never had the chance to meet. About how they had always spoke of that moment, watching their child marry, and he wished she was there with him to see us. We rarely speak about my mom at home, but 14 years later she's still very alive in his heart. It's gut wrenching at times.
My divorced parents are both cheating on their current spouses.
With each other.
When my grandfather passed away he left approx 140k$ american in a trust for me. It wasn't to be touched until after my parents passed away so that it could gain as much money as possible from the investments he had arranged. (My grandfather was an oil tycoon in PA and no one in the family knew it until after he passed away.) I got a call from the bank one day asking how I'd like to handle closing the accounts. I had no idea why, but apparently my parents had been taking medical bills from themselves and altering them to have my name on them. Then submitting them to the bank to be "reimbursed" for paying my medical bills. They had bled the trust completely dry in less than 5 years. They used the money to remodel their home. I don't think I have any recourse. But whatever. Im 35 and I have my own retirement. It just makes me mad that they would steal from me like that.
Legally, you have every right to sue your parents for failing to fulfill their duties as trustees.
Yes, as a trustee, you have a fiduciary duty (meaning you must act in the best interest of the beneficiary of the trust). Of course, in this case it's worse than that. Falsifying medical records and such is fraud. The parents would be subject to criminal charges as well as civil forfeiture of assets.
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You can absolutely obtain copies of the medical bills, prove they're not yours, and get your money back.
Does the $40,000 FDIC stand, or does fraud push that aside?
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You can sue he bank. They gave your money away when they should not have. 100% they are liable.
If his parents were trustees on the account, and they must have been, then no. You can't sue the bank. Every trust has to have a trustee responsible for the account. If OP can't touch it until his parents die, he's not the trustee. If grandpa is deceased, he's not the trustee either. Most likely the parents are the trustees and responsible for only using the account for his needs. If they presented bills for OP to be paid out of the trust, the bank isn't liable. However, that is fraud. And banks legally must provide fraud protection. If he can prove the bills weren't his, the bank has to refund the money and go after the parents. But not. He can't sue the bank for this.
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That's so shitty. I found out my mother was stealing from my old account years ago. I was barely an adult and had no experience with banks so I was using an account that was set up when I was a child and ofc she had access to it.
That happened to me. I had some smaller student loan which she persuaded me to take and then later on I received an automatic text message that she has taken 400 euros. I had very little left afterwards. She is mentally ill though and I arranged care home later on. Now I have to pay around 100 eur a month towards that :/ she also did bigger financial demage than just this
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Oh you absolutely have recourse. But the problem is, the only people who can pay you back would be your parents, and they have probably spent everything, so they might lose their house and you would get the value of that, and they would go to prison and have nothing afterwards. I would cut off ties with them for that deceit.
Pay could be docked with judgment against them. It's the principle of the thing...definitely should cut bait. Huge betrayal.
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I'd sue their asses and sell their home to recover the money. FRAUD.
Get a good lawyer and sue for your money. It was yours and they stole it.
All those people saying that the parents are dead clearly need to check their reading comprehension! The grandfather is dead and the parents stole the money - nowhere does it say they actually died. (The money wasn't SUPPOSED to be used until the parents passed away, but they emptied the account while they were still alive.)
Yes, you can sue them. And if they put that money into their home, then they might be legally forced to sell their home and pay you out the equity. That is incredibly f****d up and self-centered. Even if you care about your parents and I’m sure you do, it is not on you to let this slide so that they don’t lose their home. They made active, bad choices, and not even because one of them was in dire straits. Ugh
That is actually Fraud, They can be jailed for fraudulently misappropriating money from a trust fund or any fund, by falsifying a name.
My dad's mother set up a trust fund for our education, with him as trustee. He spent it all and then claimed there was no money for us to go to college. We took him to court two days later, and his own attorney refused to represent him. We won and he had to pay.
Yes, you have recourse. This is forgery, theft and on a federal level. Get a lawyer. Even tho some issues may be a bit old, many "start" when you find out about it; not when it occurred. If you don't want to do that, I hope you've cut them out of your life.
well, after they die, you get their house, probably more than 140k ?
I've heard stories similar to this is the past. I think these crappy people are counting on "love" for the kids to not sue.
Naive? Why? He didn't even know about the money but even if he did, trusting your parents shows that you are naive? If we can't even trust our own family then we live in a very very sad world! And yes i know some parents are horrible but i really hope that this is not the rule cause i don't want to be scared of my shadow in the end
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My dad used to talk about growing up really poor, having to get food from food banks, etc. It’s one of the reasons that now that he owns his own business, he donates to food banks and all sorts of charities all the time. Paying it back.
Well, it turns out that my fathers father owned a massive construction company, and made millions of dollars (in the 50s and 60s). My uncle was selling massive amounts of cocaine, and got busted. My grandfather bankrupted himself paying off judges and lawyers and all that to keep my uncle out of jail for most of his life. That’s why my dad grew up with nothing.
He has no idea that I know.
That my grandma has a picture of my mom. My parents separated when I was like two. My dad told my grandma to get rid of everything about her and we never spoke about her growing up. My grandma showed me the only picture she kept that my dad doesn't know about. It's the only picture of her I've ever seen
Found a naked polaroid of my dad in a box full of tiny lingerie that apparently used to fit my mum.. Kudos to mum, but ugh.
And that's the same day I learnt not to look through other people's s**t..
When my sister and I were kids my dad would sell his valuable football cards and other stuff at pawn shops so he could afford presents for us for Christmas, Easter, etc. (totally not necessary, Dad, but I love you).
When I was a child, we used to be semi-close to my dad's family. My grandparents came up (2+ hour drive) to talk to my parents about an "adult issue" and 10 year old me was told to stay in my room with the door shut. After that, we never spoke to them again, except for one letter that I got from them expressing sympathy when my other grandmother (who I was very close to) passed away. I had no idea what happened.
Years later, I found a cousin on Facebook and we happened to go to the same college, so we met for coffee. I found out that the reason we no longer spoke was because my mom opened a whole bunch of credit cards and racked up a bunch of debt in my grandma's name that she never had any intention of paying back. My cousin and I kept it between us and she has no idea I know.
My partner doesn't know he's adopted. His family doesn't know that I know either
My Mom was kidnapped. I don’t know any details, and it’s never come up. When I found out my Mom’s behavior my entire life completely made sense.
My mom had to do some soul searching for AA. She wrote a list called "life resentments" and Having Kids was the first bullet point. Found it while I was looking for my social security card to apply for my first job at 16... She kept it in a safe
This can sound cruel to you, but it may not be meant the way you look at it. You would be surprised how many parents feel this way, majority parents do feel that at some point. It can have many reasons but your mom was struggling and in that situation any parents would put having children as first point, or they'll keep lying, but you can't recieve help if you lie. It could be, that she kept it as reminder to be able to prevent those feelings...(thats usual from recoveries)
When I was a kid my mom had "mole removal" surgery on her face, and came back and head to recover for weeks. Granted, she did have a mole removed on her face.... But miraculously her A's turned into D's. Crazy how that was a side effect of face surgery.
My mom does not know that I know she has been struggling with depression for years. My dad told me. It amazes me how much she has put up with over the years. Hard s**t even for someone without depression. Funny thing is for the longest time I considered my mom a very chill, happy-go-lucky person who wasn't easily frazzled. This came as a complete shock. I guess she is trying to protect me ? I'm in my mid twenties. It's f**ked up.
That my mom talks s**t about me to my siblings. It wasn't even my siblings that told me either. I overheard her talking to my brother on the phone one night. F**king b***h.
When I was 11, I accompanied my mom to a doctor's appointment. The doctor ran through my mom's medical history, and I heard her say, "and you got an abortion last January?" I was old enough to understand what the term meant (I don't think they thought I was), and honestly it shook me up for a while because I never saw it coming.
My father has a child from an affair fairly early in my parent's relationship. He's a fairly close family friend and I have no idea how no one else has noticed. He's the spitting image of my dad.
Mum and Dad have said bits along the years about the affair. Hey I could be wrong but the timeline fits!
My parents wanted to separate after I was born due to my dads anxiety and violent temper. I only found out when I read one of my moms old diary and realized my dad wasn’t around when I was 2-3 years.
I want to preface this by saying I was adopted. My dad was 18 and wanted one last romp with my mom (17) before shipping off to the military. This is where I come from. She decided to adopt me out so we could both have ect. He never stopped loving me or thinking about me. I haven't told my adoptive mom I know they hid these, and I may never.
Yes, I know my bio dad. We have met and talked several times. We care about each other, but we don't get along. Mainly because he's a gun toating, God fearing Republican who voted Trump and I'm a liberal feminist (not radfem, but still) who volunteers at PP. Need I say more?
No, I'm not mad at my adoptive parents. I love them very much, and I think my adoptive dad knew somehow that I would be the one to find those. I know my A mom and A dad are good people (A mom is a bit of a narcissist, but that's another story) and that they were thinking of my well being at the time. I don't think it's worth bringing up and starting a fight over because it was a long time ago and - as someone who had never had children - I have no idea what the whole situation was. I'm 31 now. What's done is done.
Is there an image thats supposed to go along with this? I feel like I'm missing something.
I found my dad's journal one of the entires is how he wished he never had a girl
My dad cheated on his wife with my mom and then I was born. They were going to try to stay married but it got too hard.
Confusing .. What got too hard and who was going to "try and stay married" ? Your Dad and his wife??
Not my parents but my in laws.
Their oldest kid does not belong to my father in law. I know be cause we are all blood donors. He is O neg and she us AB pos
When I was small and my parents would go into the kitchen to scream and fight about separating, my brother and I would always huddle by the door. I don't know why, but we did. We both got to hear how they both wanted to take my brother, and how neither of them wanted to take me. You can probably guess how the two of us were treated differently growing up.
My married great-uncle was in the army and came home from overseas with an "orphaned" child that he'd "adopted" (this was back in the 70's / 80's). That child grew up to look an awful lot like my uncle. I always wonder what happened to his mother.
Trying to thinking positive, if you're right about your uncle being the father, she might have asked him to take responsibility for the kid and bring them to a safer country where they could grow up away from war.
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My father was paid a generous sum of money to marry my mother. She wasn't pregnant or anything, she REALLY wanted to marry my father and that was the only way he would marry her. Yes, in the US. No cultural or religious reason, just a financial transaction. I found the contract among his personal papers after my father's death. He did marry the "love of his life" after my mother's death, they had been high-school sweethearts, but were too poor to marry back then.
This wasn't my family secret, it was our neighbors, and everyone knew once the secret was blown. My neighbors were the biggest racists EVER, and this was in the south in the 1960, so there were a lot of racists around. Anyway, this family would rant and rave about how much they hated any other race. Then, the mom had yet another baby, and it was obviously a biracial baby. The entire family was "aryan nation blonde" except for the youngest. They eventually divorced and the mom and the youngest moved away, the rest of the crew stayed with dad.
Always the ones that complain the loudest are the biggest hypocrites.
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When I was around 16-17, I was looking for something in a desk in the dining room. I found a letter my mom wrote to my aunt. Being the nosy one, yes I read it (being deaf I was always left out so never knew what was going on). I found out she was having an affair and she was unhappy in her current marriage. Once I got to that line, I was like, "Nope, I'm done here." I returned it. I never told her I knew. She and her then-husband did separate a year or two later.
My dad was friends with a pedophile, this creepy gave my dad $70,000 to keep safe while he went into hiding. Creep turned up dead not long after and my parents spent the money. My dad has no clue I know and I am so disgusted by it all
Are you disgusted that he was friends with a pedo or that he spent the pedo's money? Part (a) i understand, but part (b) I don't get... if it's proceeds of crime or whatever, rather it goes to good than he keeps it and lets the pedo benefit from it when he goes out of jail...
Load More Replies... Some one phoned us from the town my cousin lives and informed us that my cousin is the mother of her "sister" We checked it out she did go away to take a course. My aunt her mother was a very big lady she told everyone she was pregnant- went away came back with baby the a week later my cousin came home!
My mom has no idea I know she was molested growing up and had an abortion at 14 (I don't know if the the pregnancy was a result of consensual or not). I'm grateful she had an age appropriate conversation with me at a very young age about molestation, it saved me more than once.
I have this conversation with my children. They know what's wrong and right. My teenage boys even know not to ever coherse a lady into sex.
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My paternal grandmother wouldn't let the doctor properly complete circumcise my father in fear of him dying. He went through pain and infections until he had to have it finished in his 60's. My mom let the surgery information slip.
Tangential but my immediate neighbour growing up, and best friend, his Dad was married to two women at the same time. He sold office stationary and was away a lot. My parents could never figure out why the Jones' were always struggling for money. The jig was up when Friends Reunited emerged and the other wife was a former school flame living about 20 minutes away.
My Step father has a picture of my mother on top of her new car. Her new car was in an accident several months after she got it while my parents were still married.
#23 is BS. Or at least, it's completely wrong in thinking different blood types means the child is not his (which was worded weirdly anyway. They say he's (I'm assuming the FIL) is O-, and she (assuming the child) is AB+, but they never mention the mother, so I have to assume this idiot thinks only the father's blood type matters). Blood type is dictated by your genes, NOT by your parents. Due to how genetics work, if your parents have two different blood types you have a very good chance of getting one or the other, but if you have a recessive gene then you could end up with neither parent's blood type and instead have a third one. In fact, I'm 60% sure O- as a blood type is recessive, so the kid is likely to have the same blood type as the parents of his father or something like that. Either way, blood type cannot be used as proof of infidelity.
Years ago, an ex work colleague invited me to a party at her place.She got drunk and told me how she cheated on her husband and her youngest child is not his. Funny thing is the (now ex) husband and the child absolutely love each other, they're very close and she's his favourite. My colleague's been avoiding me for years. Fear, embarrassment, who knows, but I never told anyone!
I love my grandfather and will damage anyone who says negative things about him. He was the kindest, sweetest man I ever knew, a true definition of a gentleman. I knew he fought in the second world War and that he and my grandmother immigrated from Germany in the early 50s. I didn't know what army he fought for till I saw the only photograph of this time. My mom and her sisters think they threw it out but I know exactly which army this uniform belonged to.
No assumptions, as general info I'd like to point out that most Germans back in WW2 weren't anti-Semitic, racist or Nazi themselves. Most of them were just soldiers, following normal orders and had no connection to the holocaust beyond loading people on trains and being told not to worry about what would become of those people. I find it sadly ironic that after the fall of the Third Reich is when it was established that the "I was just following orders" defence wouldn't be considered a defence to infractions to human rights, seeing as for most soldiers back then the options were "follow orders or get shot down".
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Reading some of these questions and comments I've finally lost all hope in humanity. Esp when it comes to simple science.
My dad had an affair with, and left us for, one of his patients. Her family was very Roman Catholic (she was an ex-nun!) and they told everyone that he'd never been married. My sister and I eventually met his wife's family, so I don't know how they revealed our existence.
When I was small and my parents would go into the kitchen to scream and fight about separating, my brother and I would always huddle by the door. I don't know why, but we did. We both got to hear how they both wanted to take my brother, and how neither of them wanted to take me. You can probably guess how the two of us were treated differently growing up.
My married great-uncle was in the army and came home from overseas with an "orphaned" child that he'd "adopted" (this was back in the 70's / 80's). That child grew up to look an awful lot like my uncle. I always wonder what happened to his mother.
Trying to thinking positive, if you're right about your uncle being the father, she might have asked him to take responsibility for the kid and bring them to a safer country where they could grow up away from war.
Load More Replies... My father was paid a generous sum of money to marry my mother. She wasn't pregnant or anything, she REALLY wanted to marry my father and that was the only way he would marry her. Yes, in the US. No cultural or religious reason, just a financial transaction. I found the contract among his personal papers after my father's death. He did marry the "love of his life" after my mother's death, they had been high-school sweethearts, but were too poor to marry back then.
This wasn't my family secret, it was our neighbors, and everyone knew once the secret was blown. My neighbors were the biggest racists EVER, and this was in the south in the 1960, so there were a lot of racists around. Anyway, this family would rant and rave about how much they hated any other race. Then, the mom had yet another baby, and it was obviously a biracial baby. The entire family was "aryan nation blonde" except for the youngest. They eventually divorced and the mom and the youngest moved away, the rest of the crew stayed with dad.
Always the ones that complain the loudest are the biggest hypocrites.
Load More Replies... When I was around 16-17, I was looking for something in a desk in the dining room. I found a letter my mom wrote to my aunt. Being the nosy one, yes I read it (being deaf I was always left out so never knew what was going on). I found out she was having an affair and she was unhappy in her current marriage. Once I got to that line, I was like, "Nope, I'm done here." I returned it. I never told her I knew. She and her then-husband did separate a year or two later.
My dad was friends with a pedophile, this creepy gave my dad $70,000 to keep safe while he went into hiding. Creep turned up dead not long after and my parents spent the money. My dad has no clue I know and I am so disgusted by it all
Are you disgusted that he was friends with a pedo or that he spent the pedo's money? Part (a) i understand, but part (b) I don't get... if it's proceeds of crime or whatever, rather it goes to good than he keeps it and lets the pedo benefit from it when he goes out of jail...
Load More Replies... Some one phoned us from the town my cousin lives and informed us that my cousin is the mother of her "sister" We checked it out she did go away to take a course. My aunt her mother was a very big lady she told everyone she was pregnant- went away came back with baby the a week later my cousin came home!
My mom has no idea I know she was molested growing up and had an abortion at 14 (I don't know if the the pregnancy was a result of consensual or not). I'm grateful she had an age appropriate conversation with me at a very young age about molestation, it saved me more than once.
I have this conversation with my children. They know what's wrong and right. My teenage boys even know not to ever coherse a lady into sex.
Load More Replies... My paternal grandmother wouldn't let the doctor properly complete circumcise my father in fear of him dying. He went through pain and infections until he had to have it finished in his 60's. My mom let the surgery information slip.
Tangential but my immediate neighbour growing up, and best friend, his Dad was married to two women at the same time. He sold office stationary and was away a lot. My parents could never figure out why the Jones' were always struggling for money. The jig was up when Friends Reunited emerged and the other wife was a former school flame living about 20 minutes away.
My Step father has a picture of my mother on top of her new car. Her new car was in an accident several months after she got it while my parents were still married.
#23 is BS. Or at least, it's completely wrong in thinking different blood types means the child is not his (which was worded weirdly anyway. They say he's (I'm assuming the FIL) is O-, and she (assuming the child) is AB+, but they never mention the mother, so I have to assume this idiot thinks only the father's blood type matters). Blood type is dictated by your genes, NOT by your parents. Due to how genetics work, if your parents have two different blood types you have a very good chance of getting one or the other, but if you have a recessive gene then you could end up with neither parent's blood type and instead have a third one. In fact, I'm 60% sure O- as a blood type is recessive, so the kid is likely to have the same blood type as the parents of his father or something like that. Either way, blood type cannot be used as proof of infidelity.
Years ago, an ex work colleague invited me to a party at her place.She got drunk and told me how she cheated on her husband and her youngest child is not his. Funny thing is the (now ex) husband and the child absolutely love each other, they're very close and she's his favourite. My colleague's been avoiding me for years. Fear, embarrassment, who knows, but I never told anyone!
I love my grandfather and will damage anyone who says negative things about him. He was the kindest, sweetest man I ever knew, a true definition of a gentleman. I knew he fought in the second world War and that he and my grandmother immigrated from Germany in the early 50s. I didn't know what army he fought for till I saw the only photograph of this time. My mom and her sisters think they threw it out but I know exactly which army this uniform belonged to.
No assumptions, as general info I'd like to point out that most Germans back in WW2 weren't anti-Semitic, racist or Nazi themselves. Most of them were just soldiers, following normal orders and had no connection to the holocaust beyond loading people on trains and being told not to worry about what would become of those people. I find it sadly ironic that after the fall of the Third Reich is when it was established that the "I was just following orders" defence wouldn't be considered a defence to infractions to human rights, seeing as for most soldiers back then the options were "follow orders or get shot down".
Load More Replies... Reading some of these questions and comments I've finally lost all hope in humanity. Esp when it comes to simple science.
My dad had an affair with, and left us for, one of his patients. Her family was very Roman Catholic (she was an ex-nun!) and they told everyone that he'd never been married. My sister and I eventually met his wife's family, so I don't know how they revealed our existence.
