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A lot of us are on a constant journey to improve our minds. We read books, watch films, study and otherwise educate and better ourselves so that we can become more intelligent in various ways. However, some people are just born smart and talented in some ways, requiring less effort to achieve certain things that others might struggle with. Contrary to what some might believe, being smart is not always a blessing. 

Someone created a thread on the r/AskReddit subreddit, asking about the hardships smart people have to live with, exactly because of their high intelligence, and folks delivered plenty of observations, most of which are quite heavy. Scroll down to see the whole list of things people online shared and consider upvoting the entries you relate to the most, as well as leaving a comment.

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#1

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group Being smart enough to know you're right while dealing with people too stupid to know they're wrong is soul crushing.

Stryker2279 , Allan Rotgers Report

#2

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group There are different types of intelligence. Being good at physics doesn't mean that you should manage people.

oliverismyspiritdog , NASA Kennedy Report

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Nicola Doyle
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So very true. You need emotional intelligence and ability to put yourself in others shoes to know how to motivate and support. Know this from being under terrible bosses, wonderful bosses and being a lead myself.

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#3

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group They are full of doubt compared to people who are not smart

F**k-Reddit-Mods69 , Cristian Ungureanu Report

#4

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group Our school system (Australia) isn't built to deal with them. It crushes bright kids down to everyone else's level.

The usual solution is just to give them extra work to do on top of the assigned work, when they finish that too fast. But to a kid, that's a punishment. In this way achieving beyond a certain accepted parameter is quietly discouraged.

theexteriorposterior , SOMANEDU Report

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random
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is the worst. When i realized it I haven't said anything and i'd rather draw on my paper, book etc. It's boring when i finish something that i have half an hour in few minutes and i'm stupid for teachers because i have everything covered with my drawings

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#5

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group Sad_But_Realistic said:

Expectations...

Sownd_Rum replied:

This is the killer. If you are "gifted", having an average life is seen as a failure.

Sad_But_Realistic , Scottish Government Report

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Sky Render
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The secret is to not let on that you're gifted. Play it off as a fluke, or fake a counterpoint weakness that makes it seem less impressive. The metagame of life is far deeper than most of us realize.

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jtrisn1
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This hit me in the feels. I often feigned ignorance or pretend I don't know because when I let on how much I know, I suddenly get comments from people telling me thst I need to have higher aspirations and to not settle for a average life, even though all I want is to live quietly and enjoy my hobbies.

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Zwiebel Suppe
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

People expect so much from you, when you're "gifted" - but they don't tell you how to get there. As if by being good at physics or languages you'd also naturally know how to build a career in those fields.

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Lizzy Crit
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've spent 47 years happily not living up to my potential and I don't intend to change. I have a roof over my head and food in my kitchen. Why kill myself for more stuff I don't need ?

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Leo Domitrix
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yep. "Why aren't you doing MORE"?... Cuz I want to travel, have a life outside books and work, much as I love 'em, and I like to do *other things*, too.

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Ivana Bašić
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yup. My mother was always disappointed. And even more that my daughter seems to be average in things that matter to her. I love my daughter the way she is. My mother was gifted but did nothing with it, got pregnant early instead, spent the rest of her life projecting. We don't have a relationship right now and it's such a relief not to have to deal with that anymore.

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Vin_Detta
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I feel this so much. Because I've always had a 4.0 GPA, when I got a 92% in my spanish class and ruined my GPA, I felt like everyone would be disappointed in me, even though a 3.9 GPA is still really good. It has been set into me that my only talent or strength is doing well in school, so if I im not perfect then what use am I?

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alwaysMispelled
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes. Especially to myself. I was told I could be ANYTHING so often, that all the options became way too overwhelming.

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RoseTheMad
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My IQ is above average by a fair amount, but I also happen to have dyscalculia, meaning I'm actually pretty s**t at mental math. This means one of two things: I don't have these expectations on me too much. and 2: IQ doesn't always mean you're perfectly smart at everything.

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Random Anon
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have to disagree on this one. What is average? Who decides? You decide of course. Wear your gift like a badge. Never be ashamed or hide what you are. When you've come to terms with who you are then what others think matters not. There is no expectations to live up to other than what you want out of life.

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J-A Laine
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My standard phrase when people claim I'm clever: "I just got lucky when I was thinking".

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Alvin Rendell
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Everything was too easy for me at school. My Bachelor, my Masters degree and my PhD, everything too damn easy. I struggled for challenge, but all the academic machinery in my mind did not amount to financial riches as I was not interested in that as much as people thought I should have been. Sounds as arrogant as hell, but you are still judged by how much you are able to turn your advantage into money!

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Poppy
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I always think a measure of success is if the person is happy. If they're happy with where they are as a person, who cares if they are successful in their career?

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oddly_informed_raven
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

yeah. I'm worried for college and after, because I just want to be a librarian

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Madzdad the Bard
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My father let it be known, often, that it was disappointing that I became an engineer instead of an astrophysicist. I like math, but not quite that much. Plus I didn't have to kill myself for a PhD.

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Sue User
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was one told as a gifted person, it was my duty to use my intelligence to help mankind.

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boredkitten
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How do I know if I am gifted at something? I probably haven't noticed it yet. I think I might be just average at things I am doing.

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Charlene Catello
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Everyone is gifted at something ! It isn’t necessarily always in academics , but usually you realize what you are gifted at by the time you around 25, but it doesn’t always end up being whatever it is that you want to be gifted ,at so you may just be denying it.

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madbakes
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My family and friends certainly don't treat me that way, but it's a constant internal battle.

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#6

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group Common sense is not a gift, it is a punishment. Because you have to deal with everyone who doesn’t have it.

Dangerous_Mobile9188 , Frederick Dennstedt Report

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#9

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group YourFatherHere1 said:

Intelligence doesn’t always mean wisdom.

Therandomfox replied:

Intelligence is knowing how to bring back dinosaurs from the dead.

Wisdom is knowing that that's a bad idea.

YourFatherHere1 , Rob Oo Report

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Eat Dirt Crow
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Intelligence means knowing a tomato is a fruit, wisdom is knowing that you don't use it in a fruit salad.

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#10

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group They are often miserable, and able to thoroughly understand their misery and failures.

Charming_Cash Report

#11

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group All the “smart kids” that turned into smart adults are severely burnt out and need a break for everything

Collardile , Akban Martial arts academy Report

#12

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group Hard to find other people who think and/or feel as deeply as you do.

Firm-Abies-781 , Ricardo Moraleida Report

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#13

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group Not being inherently competitive but able to be crushed instantly by failure.

Enough_Biscotti377 , Red CreaDeporte Report

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K Witmer
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My daughter deals w this it's so sad to watch her get so discouraged and blame herself for everything. She's very intelligent emotionally and scholarly. She doesn't think she is though.

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#14

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group It can be very lonely

DanTheTerrible , Bert Kaufmann Report

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Alexandra Nara
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Some structures in behaviour, relationships and communications are just annoying repeating circles and far too shallow Hard to blend in, Very often you feel just like an alien trying to adapt to the joy of lightweighted conversations Often seems to be some kind of arrogance but from this side of the fence its just pure deep sadness and loneliness- and the wish to be more like other people Not easy to be happy here in my mind

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#15

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group Expectations

Never learning to study until it is too late

Being forced to learn outside of your age related interests

Being terrified of failure

Not being able to balance ambition and said fear of failure

Once again, expectations. My mother put so much pressure on me at such a young age I couldn't handle it. I have done well for myself as an adult, but will never be able to live up to those expectations set by her and others. I should probably go back to therapy.

Putty119 , Liz Henry Report

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germs
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"Never learning to study until it's too late." Yeppp. Cuz you can get perfect grades without reading the book or paying attention in class. Very related to the other list items about school not supporting smart students enough.

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#16

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group The sad truth is that being smart isn't even a particuarly good indicator in living a happy and fulfilling life. You could be extremely smart and intelectually capable, but if you got beat up as a kid, your parents died, you developed some personality disorder etc., you're way worse off than someone well adjusted with a below average intelligence

External-Lab1103 , Jorge Franganillo Report

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#17

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group There's different levels of "smartness" and different smart people go about life in different ways. But, i think universally young prodigies are typically isolated. They are at a level far above children their age, but are far younger than the people that match intellectually with (lacking life experience). Either way, a young prodigy can't connect with either group.

Firamaster , woodleywonderworks Report

#18

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group Many very intelligent young people are poorly stimulated and challenged. Without the proper mental exercise they're unlikely to live up to their potential.

Angel_OfSolitude , Glenn Fleishman Report

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Leo Domitrix
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Even with it, we may choose not to live up to what *others* expect. Maybe we'd like to have fun, not just live according to our "potential"/"intellect", etc.

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#19

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group It's sad to see dumb people making a dumb decision in front of your eyes and not be able to do anything but only give them advice. Most helpful advice are a waste.

Most dumb people argue a lot instead of reflecting as well using critical thinking. So you will never win an arguement against a dump or bias person. So just walk away and tell them they are right.

JimboTheArtist , John Greenfield Report

#20

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group They don't always find ways of living up to their potential.

Immediate_Aioli342 , Vicchi Report

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Uber Mensch
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"You can do better - you're smarter than this!" - "If I'm smarter, why don't you listen to me?" - "Don't be a smart-@ss!"

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#21

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group Mental illness rates are dramatically higher -_-

Mihawk9999 , Kevin Simmons Report

#22

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group We waste them. Our entirely social structure from schools to mortgages are design for people with very average intellectually abilities. Smart people have to deal with the daily stress of living in a system that isn’t built for them and loose a lot of their productivity and take a real hit to their mental health as a result. If we stopped subjecting them to standardised systems designed against them just imagine how much further we would have advanced as a species.

EDIT: Just a small edit to clear up some confusion. I’m not advocating for redesigning our social structure to suit only the smartest x percent of our population. For those who aren’t familiar with inclusive design (mostly talked about when talking about designing digital systems but the principle is cross applicable) the basic idea is to design systems that provide room for different people to be able to use/fit into the system equally well despite their differences. There is absolutely no reason why we all have to live the same way or why we should be forcing people to live in a world that doesn’t have room for people like them.

Extension_Drummer_85 , Dan Taylor-Watt Report

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#23

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group Many are just suffering from the Dunning Kruger effect and don’t know it

moxeto , Sean Report

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UpQuarkDownQuark
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We all do. In fact, brilliant people can be the worst about it. “I’m a Nobel Prize-winning physicist and a classically trained cellist…therefore I’m qualified to speak at length and with authority about literally everything else!”

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#24

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group smart does not automatically mean:

- ethical

- empathic

- conscientious

- realistic

- creative

- prosocial

applesandoranges990 , Edith Soto Report

#25

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group A lot of the “smart kids” in high school are being forced by their parents to succeed. When they become adults they have all the academic skills but little life skills and they struggle to succeed.

BigCap2666 , Lorna Mitchell Report

#26

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group Lots of people will be jealous of them and resent them, including family members.

SuvenPan , Edward Kimmel Report

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R Carson
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A rising tide lifts all boats-some families block your success, instead of being cheer leaders.

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#27

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group I think truly smart people, those genuinely rare geniuses, are so smart that the rest of us can’t even comprehend it.

It must be a very strange feeling going through life knowing that most people just can’t see and understand the things you do.

Single-Incident5066 , Valerie Everett Report

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germs
Community Member
1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not a genius-level example. I once had to explain in a business meeting for around 90 minutes why we couldn't add an inch to only one side of a square and have it still be a square. I assume this is what smart people in smart professions have to deal with all too often.

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#28

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group Intelligent people can't state that they're intelligent because people view that as a sign of not being intelligent. But also if you lord yourself around for being intelligent, there's the implication that you're belittling everyone around you by saying you're better than them. And people don't like that. If other people recognize a person as intelligent and respect that then there are no problems, but a lot of the times people won't do that because it gets in the way of their own pride (and if they do, then I find they're more likely to have more insecurities/less self-esteem). Then there's also the fact that intelligence is often conflated with success. Basically, people suck at gauging other people's intelligence, and that causes problems.

Vivi_Pallas , Maryland GovPics Report

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germs
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When trying to explain my expertise, my typical experience is that, or "That sounds way over my head. I could never understand." 🙄 Yes, you can! Unfortunately I've learned a lot of people want to believe they can never understand something.

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#29

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group Feel they cant have fun because they analyze everything

Aluminumboxinshorts , Andrew Skudder Report

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Lilly Parker
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Like the fact that the previous post says loose not lose but if I point it out I’m a jerk but I can’t not see it and get annoyed when I’m just trying to read BP for fun?

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#30

30 Unpleasant Things Very Smart People Have To Live With, As Shared By Folks In This Online Group Plenty of smart people will live their whole lives never realizing they're smart.

SquilliamFancySon95 , Tom Hart Report