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Woman’s Sister Dies Unexpectedly, She Asks For A Day Off Work, But Coworker Says No Because Of Her Religious Beliefs
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People1 month ago

Woman’s Sister Dies Unexpectedly, She Asks For A Day Off Work, But Coworker Says No Because Of Her Religious Beliefs

The loss of a loved one is never an easy thing to deal with. When someone is grieving, it’s helpful if everyone else around them can try to make their life a little bit easier. Dropping off meals so they don’t have to cook, making important phone calls when they just don’t have the energy, and being there to make sure that they feel supported can all go a long way. The last thing you want to deal with when navigating a great loss is trying to find someone to cover your shift at work. But unfortunately, sometimes employers are not willing to help out, and coworkers cannot always accommodate you.

4 days ago, one teenager reached out to the “Am I The Jerk?” subreddit to share the heartbreaking story of how they recently lost their sister. While attempting to get a shift covered at work so they could attend their sister’s funeral, they ended up in an ethically questionable situation. Below, you can read the full story and decide whether you think they were wrong for requesting help from their coworker, and then let us know what you think in the comments. Then if you’re interested in another Bored Panda piece featuring the same subreddit, check out this story next.   

This employee recently asked the internet if they were wrong for how they went about trying to get a shift covered

Image credits: Julia Taubitz (not the actual photo)


Image credits: Cynthia Smith (not the actual photo)



Image credits: vcottonpicker

The employee also clarified some details about the situation in the comments

Many of the commenters noted that it should not be the responsibility of this employee to get their shift covered in a situation like this. Family emergencies do not happen every day, and it would be ridiculous to assume they could miss their sister’s funeral to go to work. In unique circumstances such as these, the boss should be willing to step in and cover the shift. They should be qualified to cover any of their employees’ shifts, and they should understand that it is not a situation that is going to happen often. There is no need for them to be completely heartless.

Some people said it was wrong to ask multiple times

When it comes to bereavement leave, what this employee is entitled to completely depends on where they live. But taking a day off to attend a funeral of an immediate family member should not require jumping through hoops. Whether that day off would be paid or not might be in question, but that was clearly not this person’s concern. They just wanted to be able to grieve with their family and celebrate their beloved sister. If this employee lives in the United States, for example, there is no specific, mandated bereavement leave, but the U.S. Family Medical Leave Act does allow employees to take up to 12 weeks off (unpaid) for family-related matters. Surely, this would qualify as a “family-related matter”.  

While readers are split on the issue, the majority agreed that the crux of the matter is how the employer responded









In a tricky situation like this one, where a coworker who would normally cover a shift cannot work due to religious reasons, the employer should not even hesitate to step up. This worker was not asking for a day off to go on vacation or attend a concert, and they are likely going through the worst thing they have ever experienced at the moment. Employers need to remember to be compassionate towards their employees because I’m sure if they lost a loved one, they would be attending the funeral without any questions as well. Let us know what you think about this situation in the comments, and if you have ever had to deal with a difficult employer during a time like this, we would love to hear how you stood your ground. 

The employee has since updated the original post as well


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JL
Community Member
1 month ago

Setting aside the funeral for a moment, there are only two people who can work a specific area, and one is never available for Saturdays, meaning the other is forced to be there every Saturday. If something happens to them (illness, car accident, quitting, etc), then what? Management definitely needs to have contingencies in place instead of assuming nothing will ever go wrong.

Emmydearest
Community Member
1 month ago

I also think it's unfair if there are only two employees and one is forced to work every Saturday. She might want to have a Saturday off once in a while... If your religion (absurdly) requires you don't work on Saturday, you find another job that allows that. Like an office job, from Monday to Friday, for example. I respect your religion but your religion de facto damages me, depriving me of the right to have Saturdays off (and not to fall ill or have an accident or go to a wedding on Saturday).

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Dirk Daring
Community Member
1 month ago

Two things: One, I hope this young person learns very soon that they should NEVER work for a boss that won't let them take time off for a FUNERAL. Two, how is freezer such a CRUCIAL job that can only be entrusted to a 17 year old? NOBODY in the whole place can handle the task for one damn day?

Emme Magnolia
Community Member
1 month ago

My guess is it's not crucial or particularly difficult, it's that no one wants to work it

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Ozacoter
Community Member
1 month ago

Like everybody said the real a*****e is the employer. But any branch of a religion that is so strict that completely forbids a harmless thing like working on a saturday (or eat meat on fridays like it used to be in my catholic country ) should not be accepted in a modern society. Its sad seing people chained to iron age mythology.

Plenty Pineapples
Community Member
1 month ago

I once worked at a restaurant that was putting pressure on a Muslim girl to try cocktails as "she couldn't really serve without knowing the menu". To them it was harmless and the idea, as you said, shouldn't exist at this day and age. I was horrified for her. We should respect people's religious beliefs, even if we don't understand them. Would you expect a vegan to sample cheese because you can't relate? I absolutely agree that the real a*****e is the boss. But disagree with the second part of your comment.

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Johan Barnhoorn
Community Member
1 month ago

That is such a toxic workplace to work for. You should get at least a day off to deal with your losses without asking your colleagues to cover. Is this America? Here (in the NL) if someone close to you dies, you can get as many days off as you need. Am sorry for your loss and just go to the funeral, without asking your colleagues to cover.

Mary Rogers
Community Member
1 month ago (edited)

That place sounds so toxic that I suspect sooner or later she would get fired anyway. That happened to my father (a long time ago) at a much better job that DID allow employees to take bereavement leave but he had just started a new job when his young son died. His boss never forgave him for taking time off and harrassed him for it and eventually fired him. He even tried to ruin my father's career by blacklisting him so he couldn't get another job. Fortunately my father talked to one of his contacts in the field who happened to know something unsavory about this boss that he wouldn't want to be publicly known. Suddenly the blacklisting stopped. This sounds like a first job for this person and frankly I wouldn't take this too seriously and I would just start looking for something better.

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Jaryd
Community Member
1 month ago

If she is the only person who can work Saturdays that manager is not managing very well.

Edgar
Community Member
1 month ago

So, because she has an imaginary friend, she's allowed not to work on Saturday. But her sister died in real life, and it's not taken seriously ?

Phil Vaive
Community Member
1 month ago

People who use their religion as an excuse to make someone else's life worse are f*****g disgusting.

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María Hermida
Community Member
1 month ago

If a person refuses to help in an emergency or in a terrible loss like this on "religious" grounds, that person is a total a*****e. Any religion. There's no excuse for this behaviour, and I don't think any god could approve of this kind of total lack of empathy and humanity.

Tracy Sellars
Community Member
1 month ago

They have the right to say no. It should not be up to them to cover, the employer should have policies in place to deal with this. The fact people are just accepting that it is normal for a company forcing people to choose and blaming the co-worker is what is messed up.

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S
Community Member
1 month ago

You're absolutely not an a*****e for asking more than once... your f*****g sister died. Death trumps a persons feelings about religion any day of the week in my book. Everyone else was insensitive to YOU.

Paz
Community Member
1 month ago

You are missing the point. the point is that it's neither of these young girls' problem. that's what managers are for. The pointing finger at the religious colleague is just wrong and does exactly what your comment suggests - hate religion because it interferes with someone else life. Well, how about LGBT rights? disabled peoples' rights? No one forces you to believe in god, but being respectful is a basic virtue for any human being.

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Chich
Community Member
1 month ago (edited)

If you use your religion as an excuse you had better well follow *every* other goddamn tennet of it, not just the trendy, convenient or "oh look how devout *I* am" ones.

Carol Emory
Community Member
1 month ago (edited)

My aunt and I were really close. When she passed from liver failure, I was scheduled to work a shift on the day of the funeral. I bugged co-workers to swap with me and was threatened with firing too...at an accounting office during their end of fiscal year close. The manager, or heartless b**** as I referred to her, said "No." And threatened to fire me if I went. I went over her head to her supervisor who allowed me bereavement leave and called my manager in her office to inform her of federal policies on the FMLA laws. My managers boss came in that day (normally did not) to cover my shift. I would follow that woman to the end of the Earth! So why couldn't your manager cover your shift and, if the community is mainly Jewish, then maybe they should close the store on Saturday like they do in South USA on Sunday for all the Christians.

Deborah B
Community Member
1 month ago

Management is the AH here. People saying that the coworker is being heartless are wrong. Her deeply held beliefs require her not to work - this is not an emergency, and there is a false dichotomy here. The situation is not "either OP misses her sister's funeral or her coworker breaks the Sabbeth". There is a third option here: "Manager does their job, and either arranges cover, does the job themself, or rearranges deliveries/workload so they can manage without freezer staff for one shift."

Libstak
Community Member
1 month ago

There is a potential to save a life here. Imagine your sibling died and you had to go to the funeral, it cost you your job, you couldn't get another and end up on the streets? I think most people would take the funeral over the potential job loss. As the person who could save this job aka the co worker, it could be argued they are saving their co workers life as they are otherwise leaving that person to suffer deeply regardless of the choice they make. That suffering could lead to terrible choices as a result that if not physically most definitely spiritually would have a terrible outcome for their future.

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Valerie Solanas
Community Member
1 month ago (edited)

Obviously the biggest a*****e is the boss but the coworker is also kinda an a*****e, like op's sister literally died but she cares more about some imaginary dude in the sky? Zero empathy. Same with all the people saying YTA, an actual person is more important then someone's imaginary friend.

Istax
Community Member
1 month ago

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Alexandra Nara
Community Member
1 month ago

I never want to believe in a god that chooses strict religious behaviour over a kind human heart. I'm pretty sure if there is a loving god he will understand an exception. If I will be punished afterlife for taking care, I will not bow in fear but handle the same way again.

Ozacoter
Community Member
1 month ago

Exactly. I dont believe in gods but if I did I would never worship one as cruel as the god in the abrahamic religions.

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Void Boi
Community Member
1 month ago

You shouldn't have even had to have asked. It's not your or her responsibility to find you coverage. It's your employer's. I can't believe you had to go through this and I'm so sorry for your loss. When everything settles down I would suggest looking for a new job. Possibly one that's run by human beings with souls. Good luck to you!

Cassie
Community Member
1 month ago

This is an employer problem and never should have been a conflict between the employees. I hate employers that won't make the effort to figure out their own staffing and act like it's the employees' responsibility.

madbakes
Community Member
1 month ago

I just don't understand how any religion values the "rules" over helping someone in their time of need. I would like to think anyone committed to their faith would also be committed to being good to other humans. That said, management is the biggest a*****e.

Paz
Community Member
1 month ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

You are missing the point. the point is that it's neither of these young girls' problem. that's what managers are for. The pointing finger at the religious colleague is just wrong and does exactly what your comment suggests - hate religion because it interferes with someone else life. Well, how about LGBT rights? disabled peoples' rights? No one forces you to believe in god, but being respectful is a basic virtue for any human being.

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Linda's friend Ginger
Community Member
1 month ago

I guess I just don't see why OP is the a*****e. She's 17 and lost her sister quickly and tragically. The last thing on her mind is her coworker's religion.

Tilfeldig Forbipasserende
Community Member
1 month ago (edited)

Some of the problem is the way this kind of posts ask the question: "Am I the A*H?". It very often leads to yes/no answers. So even IF she was wrong, that doesn't mean she was an a*h. If I am to dish out blame in this case, most of it would land on her manager, and least on the OP. I think the repeated pleading was very understandable, but not very smart. But, in that situation, could she - a 17 y.o. - have done differently in that dire situation? I cannot see how. As to using religion as an excuse to, well anything, is a filthy habit.

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The Starsong Princess
Community Member
1 month ago

LW should get her boss’ boss and/or HR involved if her workplace has them. If not, then her boss should be training someone on the freezer before the funeral because if LW got hit by a car on a Saturday, they would be in the same position. This isn’t an LW problem or a coworker problem, it’s a boss problem.

Ladytron
Community Member
1 month ago

Its the workplace - not the co-workers. These things happen and a serious employer should have a plan for how to deal with it. Its over these workers pay grades to solve issues like this. That being said- I am a bit confused over how the religious co-worker got hired there if she can't work Sundays and the place only have two employees? But all comes down to the workplace anyway so I wouldn't say any of them are at fault.

Mary Rogers
Community Member
1 month ago

It the updates she explains that there are more co-workers, but they are not trained to work that particular job. And this is a majority Jewish community, which means most of the other employees also can't work Saturdays (which is their Sabbath, not Sundays).

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TCW Sam Vimes
Community Member
1 month ago

Religions are just plain b******t. If you need a Religion to be a good person, you're not a good person. If you can't be a good person to someone, because your f****d up religion forbids you to, you should seriously doubt that religion. Also f**k that job policy where you can't even go to the funeral of your sister. Something is seriously wrong in that country.

Arizona Cowboy
Community Member
1 month ago

The co-worker has religion but clearly isn't a good person. Having compassion and helping a fellow human being out would e a good person thing to do BUT management shouldn't be putting either of them in this position...

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iblewsheep
Community Member
1 month ago

religious beliefs is ALWAYS a stupid excuse for anything. Damn cultist mentalities like this get so much protection and "acceptance" and it needs to STOP! And yeah the Manager or whoever should handle this.

Venessa Richard
Community Member
1 month ago

Just goes to show how ridiculous religion is. Every religion. Causes more problems than anything else

ioala
Community Member
1 month ago

I still lol at the fact that people use their religion as a valid reason to not work on certain days. It's made up.

Seedy Vine
Community Member
1 month ago

If they fire OP for bereavement, they might be able to bring a lawsuit against their boss. It's worth a try.

ICE
Community Member
1 month ago

OP definitely NTA, however, both the manager and the religious nut (RN) are major AHs. Worst one the manager of course, because she should have a contingency plan in place - maybe cover OP’s shift herself if all else fails? And the RN is an AH because if you value your religion more than basic human decency, you is and will always be the AH. Let’s face it, all religions are just fantasies, mushroom-induced or not, and it is time that all religions end with their BS control of human behavior. Religion has always and will always do more damage than good in this world, and RN is, in fact, just using it to duck work every Saturday, no matter what lies she tells herself to trick herself into believing the BS rules. No, the sky is not going to fall if she works one Saturday to cover for a bereaved co-worker. If there was any worth at all in her religion, it should condemn her for her lack of empathy, not for a non-issue such as working on a Saturday. Stop indulging RNs of all kinds!

phil blanque
Community Member
1 month ago

Managers have to be able to adapt to pretty much every situation. They need to anticipate. If all else fails, they need to step up and do the work. I would presume the manager understands all of the jobs and could get by filling in for you. And what a wonderful gift the manager would offer you by doing so!

LynzCatastrophe
Community Member
1 month ago

Go to the funeral. I missed my nanas funeral because I was in the middle of moving to another apartment and busy at work, I barely had time to sleep, and I wish I had just said screw it and left for a couple days, I had coworkers dying for extra hours. I'm not giving you c**p for being 17, you're just starting to learn the job market and how employers run places. This one should have shown compassion. Your sister died, you asked for a single day off of the funeral, not to grieve. I'm curious about one thing though, I'm not sure what your job is but you said your in a fairly predominant Jewish community, why is this business open on Saturday to begin with if she's going to employ mostly Jewish people? While harassing a coworker is a dic move when she gave her religious reasons, I'm giving you a pass for your age and lack of experience. The others giving you a hard time should show compassion as well.

Emmydearest
Community Member
1 month ago

First: the real A-hole is the employer obvs. Secondly: how in the world is it possible that an employee that needs ONE DAY to go her sister's funeral has to find the replacement herself?! This is what reckless capitalism has led us, guys. Third: in my opinion, helping a grieving person in need is much more "in God's favour" than respecting a holiday. Fourth: I don't care about your religion. At all. You can do whatever you want at home but you don't get favoritism because you're religious. For all I know it can be all a lie, maybe the religious coworker claims she can't work on Saturdays but then she stays home and has a sidejob. How would I know? If religion is so important to you, you should get a mon-fri office job. Otherwise you're forcing your coworker to work every Saturday. Maybe she would want to have a Saturday off once in a while as well,don't you think. I really hate this entitlement.

Bernd Herbert
Community Member
1 month ago

This is ridiculous. Somebody mentioned something like „dictated to them by god“. Nope. Not a thing. Nothing will happen to that person if she/he worked on a Saturday. Even once. Literally Nothing!

Brianna Leahy Johnson
Community Member
1 month ago

Here come all the religious people to downvote all the completely rational and moral comments

Inu-chan
Community Member
1 month ago (edited)

I do think that the employer is an a-hole. I think that in most religions, you would be forgiven for what you think may be perhaps sinning, especially if you are helping another person. It is not going to negatively affect you. I believe that if you are religious as I am, it is our duty to not be pressuring other people to abide by our rules when they don't believe in them, and hence making people feel a negative way about religion, because in my family, and the way I've been raised, which may admittedly be different to others, religion is not supposed to be a bad thing :) in simple terms, don't be an a-hole.

Marlene Botzum
Community Member
1 month ago

The coworker WASN'T trying to make the OP follow Jewish law, she simply wanted to follow it herself. The only AH here is the manager.

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Brianna Leahy Johnson
Community Member
1 month ago (edited)

The co-worker is the a***hole. Really living your religious principles by refusing to cover the shift of someone who lost their sister suddenly? Which do you think your "God" would rather you do? Follow an arcane rule written like 3k years ago, or help a fellow human who is grieving? Also, there is no god, so that's an easy one.

Claire Elizabeth
Community Member
1 month ago

Now, I'm not Jewish (I'm Christian), but I believe that at least in the Bible it states that you are allowed to break the Sabbath (not working on Saturdays) if it is to do a good deed. I feel like this would be an appropriate time to break that rule. Sucks because it was a great opportunity to show love and compassion for that poor woman

loona
Community Member
1 month ago

Nope, you're allowed if it is to save lives. So, not for a funeral.

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Y D
Community Member
1 month ago

Manager hands-down TA. Not religious, myself. Have many Jewish friends. Consensus among them is Judaism isn't an excuse not to work Saturdays, and a real practicing Jew would be more concerned with helping out a person in need than the minutiae of it being a Saturday. I find it wisest to let religious people put other religious people in their place when their beliefs hold no meaning to me, but matter to them.

jasonleeortiz
Community Member
1 month ago

You know what would be nice? If instead of just refusing, that "religious" co-worker had supported the OP with her manager. I think God would have liked that.

Andrew Dunford
Community Member
1 month ago

The OP is NTAH here! The heartless coworker who refused to cover, simply because they believed that their Big Bearded, Imaginary Boss in the sky says that they shouldn't is Definitely TAH!

NOLAHusker
Community Member
1 month ago

Why is a 17 year old responsible for scheduling people?!???

Cross Oni
Community Member
1 month ago

Because management is shitty.

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S
Community Member
1 month ago

Forget this whole story. When an immediate family member passes away, you are legally allowed bereavement leave for the visitation, funeral, and often more time just to mourn. If I were you I would have said, "This is the date of the funeral, I will not be present at work. Thank you." and left it at that. It is not your responsibility to find coverage, that is a managers responsibility. Period. As for the religious thing, everyone else can and will get over it.

Tilfeldig Forbipasserende
Community Member
1 month ago

Unless I'm mistaken, nothing is said about which country this is in (although we may guess). If no country is given, "legally allowed" does not necessarily apply. Still, time off for such reasons ought to be legally mandated anywhere. Aside from that, personally I don't think "because religion" is an acceptable excuse - ever!

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Step
Community Member
1 month ago

People will make any excuse to not be understanding and a compassionate human being. It's really not that hard to treat other people with decency, especially when they are going through something horrible.

Helen X
Community Member
1 month ago

Dear OP, quit the job. Your family and your sister are more important than a job that doesn’t even let you bury your own relatives. You’re only 17, many more jobs to come.

M
Community Member
2 weeks ago

This is not a worker problem, this is a manager problem. You don't ASK for time off from work to attend your sister's funeral. You TELL them you will not be there because your sister died. They're lucky you're coming in at ALL, after that. Your manager is responsible for covering the shift in such an emergency. Not you.

Doctor Strange
Community Member
1 month ago

Any discussion about the coworker's religion is irrelevant. It is not the OP or the coworkers responsibility to cover the shift. OP needs the day off, the manager has to arrange the coverage. If the OP's coworker can't work that day, for any reason, that is STILL the managements responsibility to resolve. That is why they are management, to be in charge and to handle situations. The only one in the wrong here is the management for trying to pull this stunt in the first place.

Patricia Murphy
Community Member
1 month ago

Tell your boss u can not come in. If u r really in need go to your county and apply for food stamps, temporary help and medicaid. Call any public assistance place like the Salvation army, Catholic Charities, etc. If your boss is this dickish report them to corporate or owner. If they still won't help use the company name in your public post. People my boycott.

El Dee
Community Member
1 month ago

It's up to your supervisor to schedule shifts. You are entitled to bereavement leave. Take the time off, after telling him/her, and go to be with your family..

Cross Oni
Community Member
1 month ago

I wipe my a*s with God's commandments.

Mikey Kliss
Community Member
1 month ago

Religious exemptions are BS. I apologize to anyone offended by that but you show me a religious exemption and I'll show you someone who uses that as an excuse and then does other things that should be sacred or against the doctrine they follow. Also if the place is predominantly Jewish then the owners should understand that Saturdays are a no go

AR
Community Member
2 weeks ago

Screw the religious beliefs, if their god is truly amazing, I doubt he would care if one Saturday was worked. This is a living breathing human being who just lost a loved one in a very tragic way. His needs *because he is living and breathing* matters more than some magic man in the sky. I usually don’t have issues with peoples’ beliefs, but if it hurts *living and breathing people*, I get pissed off. The boss is also a jerk too.

Arenite
Community Member
1 month ago

Your religion trumps (sorry) my life? F that noise! You can believe any fantasy that gives you comfort, but once you try to inflict that belief on others, you are the AH.

DC
Community Member
1 month ago

NTA. Religion sucks. Boss sucks.

celery g
Community Member
1 month ago

working your life around a fictional being, ugh! Boss is the a*****e!

Vladimíra Matejová
Community Member
1 month ago

i am waiting for the day when the world is free of all the religions as they make more harm than use. that being said, if the other co-worker has stipulated in her contract she will not work on saturdays then she is not an AH. employer should not have hired her or they should have hired/trained someone who can cover saturdays in emergencies or just in case OP wants to have a day off. ir the manager can do it or tgey can just close tge section for one shift

DannX68
Community Member
1 month ago

When my mom died, I called my boss. She said I should stay home for 2 weeks, even if it meant that other people had to cover my closing shifts. THAT is how you do it.

Alice Teasdale
Community Member
1 month ago

OMG NTA WHAT IS WITH THIS BOSS? This feels fake. There should be no question that a funeral takes priority over any work. They wouldn't let you in the freezer if you caught covid on a Saturday. If they sack you, are there no unfair dismissal rules where you are??

Lyone Fein
Community Member
1 month ago

It is management's job to fill shifts. Making workers find their own replacements is lazy and poor management. Period. Also having only 2 people who are capable of performing a task is poor management. Also making someone work when a medical or family emergency arises is poor management. The question of a coworker's religion or other schedule conflict is irrelevant and is a red herring. The issue here is lousy management.

Awoo
Community Member
1 month ago

I don't know how anyone can expect the co-worker to change her entire belief system in one second. The co-worker was raised in a society that believes in something quite strongly. To decide to work on Saturday, it is likely the co-worker would need to question the entire way she was raised and all of her beliefs. She would need to question and examine how her family and her society raised her. She might be ostracized by her family, friends, and/or community. That is not something that gets mentally sorted in an instant. Maybe the co-worker will question her religious belief in time. Maybe this situation will jump start the process. But how can you assume that making this decision would not cause the co-worker distress to the point of a mental health crisis? People and society are complex. The manager needs to train and/or hire more freezer workers (or do the job themselves for one day).

Cross Oni
Community Member
1 month ago (edited)

Nah. If your religious belief prevents you from letting someone attend a family member's funeral, that's a shitty belief. If you hold onto that belief so strongly that it prevents someone from attending their family member's funeral, you're a shitty person. Especially since God and Jesus would be way into letting that person go to the funeral, as they preach not being shitty.

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VeryDarkMatter
Community Member
1 month ago (edited)

This kind of s**t can only be in the US. Where I live you have the legal right for at least one day off when a close family member died (for the funeral). And it is the companies problem to find a replacement for you that day. Not your problem. The whole US labor system is really inhumane. You count NOTHING. You are just a working drone and they give a s**t about you. That is so sad. The Co-Worker who values her religion higher than another human beings need.. well, i have my difficulties with all kind of religions that put their traditions before the need of people. When people cry: You need to respect their believes!!! .. I think you need to respect your fellow human being and treat him/her always right, not harm them. But people who are so deeply into their religion are not seeing this anymore. Only matters what is written in an old book .. no matter how good or bad it is. Sad.

Thomas Harper
Community Member
1 month ago

Tell me you work in the USA without telling me you work in the USA...

anarkzie
Community Member
1 month ago

Yeah you were an arsehole. I understand the importance of the day and as an atheist I can't help think that religion is kind of stupid but it's her values and she should not have to break them to cover a shift at work

FreshGanesh
Community Member
1 month ago

I get the sentiment, but where do we draw the line with personal values or religious values? As of now, we don’t. I’ll say it again: what if mine were blood or fertility ritual every day at 1:30PM, outside facing east??? As of now, the employer must accommodate my values/religion. It’s just the way it is. I suppose the question is why personal values or religious adherence trumps mechanics & systems of secular society. It’s crappy all around, but then to disrupt society has always been the goal of religion even if it’s not the goal of most modern religions and followers, it’s still a result.

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Paz
Community Member
1 month ago

I really don't like the pointing fingers at the religious collogue. s/he has nothing to do with the situation. if needed, the freezer (not even sure what this is but it's not relevant) should be closed before forcing someone to miss their family member's funeral or making someone work on a holy day (i'm Jewish - it's illegal to even ask someone in Israel to work on a Saturday unless there are special circumstances - this is not one of them). This post is very dangerous and might make people hate religion (no matter which one) even more than they do now.

Valerie Solanas
Community Member
1 month ago

You say it as if hating religion is bad and not completely justified

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MoJo1979
Community Member
1 month ago

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Kind of an ahole for pressing the issue with your colleague, Some religions don't permit you to work on a Saturday, so she probably can't actually work or she would be shunned from her community. Your job also isn't worth it if they can't accommodate you for your sisters funeral.

kat lia
Community Member
1 month ago

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no means no, stop forcing other people to work for you. just tell your boss that you can't come.

Cross Oni
Community Member
1 month ago

Did you read the whole story?

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Jo Firth
Community Member
1 month ago

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How can you get to 17 years old while living in a largely Jewish community, and not know that Saturdays are religious days?

JL
Community Member
1 month ago

Setting aside the funeral for a moment, there are only two people who can work a specific area, and one is never available for Saturdays, meaning the other is forced to be there every Saturday. If something happens to them (illness, car accident, quitting, etc), then what? Management definitely needs to have contingencies in place instead of assuming nothing will ever go wrong.

Emmydearest
Community Member
1 month ago

I also think it's unfair if there are only two employees and one is forced to work every Saturday. She might want to have a Saturday off once in a while... If your religion (absurdly) requires you don't work on Saturday, you find another job that allows that. Like an office job, from Monday to Friday, for example. I respect your religion but your religion de facto damages me, depriving me of the right to have Saturdays off (and not to fall ill or have an accident or go to a wedding on Saturday).

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Dirk Daring
Community Member
1 month ago

Two things: One, I hope this young person learns very soon that they should NEVER work for a boss that won't let them take time off for a FUNERAL. Two, how is freezer such a CRUCIAL job that can only be entrusted to a 17 year old? NOBODY in the whole place can handle the task for one damn day?

Emme Magnolia
Community Member
1 month ago

My guess is it's not crucial or particularly difficult, it's that no one wants to work it

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Ozacoter
Community Member
1 month ago

Like everybody said the real a*****e is the employer. But any branch of a religion that is so strict that completely forbids a harmless thing like working on a saturday (or eat meat on fridays like it used to be in my catholic country ) should not be accepted in a modern society. Its sad seing people chained to iron age mythology.

Plenty Pineapples
Community Member
1 month ago

I once worked at a restaurant that was putting pressure on a Muslim girl to try cocktails as "she couldn't really serve without knowing the menu". To them it was harmless and the idea, as you said, shouldn't exist at this day and age. I was horrified for her. We should respect people's religious beliefs, even if we don't understand them. Would you expect a vegan to sample cheese because you can't relate? I absolutely agree that the real a*****e is the boss. But disagree with the second part of your comment.

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Johan Barnhoorn
Community Member
1 month ago

That is such a toxic workplace to work for. You should get at least a day off to deal with your losses without asking your colleagues to cover. Is this America? Here (in the NL) if someone close to you dies, you can get as many days off as you need. Am sorry for your loss and just go to the funeral, without asking your colleagues to cover.

Mary Rogers
Community Member
1 month ago (edited)

That place sounds so toxic that I suspect sooner or later she would get fired anyway. That happened to my father (a long time ago) at a much better job that DID allow employees to take bereavement leave but he had just started a new job when his young son died. His boss never forgave him for taking time off and harrassed him for it and eventually fired him. He even tried to ruin my father's career by blacklisting him so he couldn't get another job. Fortunately my father talked to one of his contacts in the field who happened to know something unsavory about this boss that he wouldn't want to be publicly known. Suddenly the blacklisting stopped. This sounds like a first job for this person and frankly I wouldn't take this too seriously and I would just start looking for something better.

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Jaryd
Community Member
1 month ago

If she is the only person who can work Saturdays that manager is not managing very well.

Edgar
Community Member
1 month ago

So, because she has an imaginary friend, she's allowed not to work on Saturday. But her sister died in real life, and it's not taken seriously ?

Phil Vaive
Community Member
1 month ago

People who use their religion as an excuse to make someone else's life worse are f*****g disgusting.

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