Niece Complains That Service Dog Is Making Her Uncomfortable, Her Aunt Refuses To Get Rid Of It, Starts Family Drama
We all know that dogs are man’s best friend, but aside from all of the joy and companionship they bring us, they can also become essential members of our family. In the United States, there are currently at least 500,000 service dogs, constantly helping individuals with disabilities. Unfortunately, not everyone understands how vital these dogs can be, as one woman recently found out.
This woman shared a story on the “Am I the [Jerk]?” subreddit detailing how her family members that are staying with her temporarily have begun pressuring her to relocate her husband’s service dog for the time being. Below, you’ll find the full story that might make you extremely frustrated for the woman and her husband, as well as some of the replies heated readers have left on her post.
We would love to hear your thoughts in the comments, and feel free to share any of your personal stories, if you have experience with service dogs, as well. Then if you’re interested in reading another Bored Panda article featuring drama that ensued after one relative was kind enough to take their family members in, you can find that story right here.
After being pressured by her relatives to relocate her husband’s service dog, this woman is wondering if she’s in the wrong
Image credits: My Photo Journeys
Image credits: Karolina Grabowska
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Although you may not encounter one every day, service dogs are a vital part of many people with disabilities’ lives. They can take on many different roles, depending on the needs of their owners, but as the woman in this Reddit post stated, they are just as helpful as a human being. You may be familiar with guide dogs, who are used to help individuals who are blind or visually impaired, and hearing dogs, who help people that are deaf or hearing impaired, but there are a variety of other services that our furry friends can learn to help with.
For individuals with epilepsy, seizure alert dogs can be a godsend. They are trained to detect the signs that their owner might be having a seizure and know how to alert others for help and even position themselves in a way to help protect their owner. Diabetic alert dogs use their incredible sense of smell to detect when their owner’s blood sugar starts to drop dangerously low. And if it’s already become too low, the dogs know how to seek out help from others.
Allergy detection dogs can be great for children and adults with life-threatening allergies. Yet again, the dog’s outstanding sense of smell comes in handy, as it can be used to find traces of allergens in the air or in foods close enough to their owners to potentially cause harm. Sometimes, these dogs even accompany kids to school or adults to work to help detect allergies in less controlled environments, such as a school cafeteria or office lunchroom.
There are also mobility assistance dogs, which can do anything from pulling wheelchairs up ramps to pressing elevator buttons for people with impaired motor functions. But service dogs can be helpful for people without physical disabilities as well. Autism support dogs can provide companionship and support for individuals on the autism spectrum. These dogs can even help people maintain their well-being, navigate social situations and improve their communication skills.
If you see a service dog out in public, no matter how adorable they may look, resist the urge to look them in the eye or try to get their attention. They cannot be distracted from their main purpose, providing support and assistance to their owners. It is incredibly insensitive for the family members in this story to demand that their relative go without his trusted, service dog companion, even for a short time. If the dog bothers them so much, they can always find somewhere else to stay. We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments, and if you have a service dog, feel free to share how helpful it is for you.
Many readers have weighed in reassuring the woman that she has every right to stand her ground
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Everybody keeps saying that it's a service dog and not a pet, but I wouldn't give away my pets in this situation either. They are my pets, my family members, I'm responsible for them. I'm not giving up them because my bratty teenage niece is "uncomfortable". Would she be more comfortable living on the streets?
You are right. The point is, that even if you don't get the pet owner perpective (let's be real:not everybody understands the importance of pets) at least they should understand the medical part.
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„Yelling about how I value a dog over my niece and her comfort“ „ He said that I was being unsupportive and cruel to my niece who's already been through enough“ Don‘t you „love“ it when people accuse others of things they themselves are actively doing, in order to get their way?
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 for not moving your dog. You are doing them a favor having them in your house. they should appreciate that.
Imagine this: you're about to end up homeless, your sister is gracious enough to save you and let's you move in and you a...e have the audacity to demand her to get rid of her sick/ disabled husband's very much needed assistance dog for no valid reason. Gosh, shut up and be grateful for the help you are provided or go and live on the streets or in a shelter.
Right? I've been homeless and stayed in places with people I couldn't stand, but you better believe I kept my mouth shut and pretended I loved every minute of it until I could do something different bc I was grateful to be there regardless.
Load More Replies... Try teaching fúcking entitled kids and parents like this. They are in every class now. Teachers -- thanks for your service (it's, "domestic peace corps").
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Your house, your rules. They knew it up front right? Relocate the dog? “There’s the door dearest brother, if your daughter feels uncomfortable feel free to leave. O wait, you got nowhere else to go? Then tell your daughter to just ignore the dog.” The dog, service dog or not, stays. No matter what.
Your first sentence is it. THE point! Learn it and repeat it while you are young enough to enforce it. Once you're my age.... well, I have a big walking stick and had a nice size (if somewhat older) dog. I can use that cane and my furry baby always knew precisely whose home it was and exactly who did belonged here. I miss him. Sorry.
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I need an update from the OP. I hope she told her brother & his ungrateful a*s family to GTFO
Right? I'm dying to know what happened next. Did she tell them to get out? Did they leave quietly? Doubt it. And what about the dog makes her "uncomfortable"? I have so many questions.....
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The dog is not just a dog, he is medical equipment. You don't get rid of someone's medical equipment. I don't know what this girl's problem is but she needs to grow up and her parents need to stop trying to cater to her. She is a guest in someone else's home and doesn't get to make decisions about what goes on in the house. If they are this unhappy, then they need to find somewhere else to stay.
Absolutely the husband and dog stay. For all the reasons everyone has said. The brother and his family are being ungrateful and beyond entitled. They knew the dog was there before they came to stay, but gladly accepted the help. They are all kinds of sketchy. They need to go asap!
It's a service dog, ffs, not a pet. And it's a member of the immediate family who lives there. They want the disabled man who's house it is, and his dog to go stay elsewhere simply because the spoiled teenager says so? Seriously. The peop,e ate already imposing by staying there. Now they see no problem makig one of the people who is got enough to let them syst there, leave. What tf is won with the people. The wife is right, it's their home. The teen needs to stick it up and deal with the fact that it's not her place and she has no right to ask that of them. Her parents are self absorbed jack-azzes and are raising another one. KICK THEM OUT!
Does not matter. My pets would not be kicked out because some mooching twat wad "uncomfortable " with them. My home is their home. I rescued them and would not dump them for a stupid reason like that.
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All the other arguments aside (which I fully support btw) it's crucial that the service dogs stays in the family, especially since it's only been there for 4 months, because you want and need a special bond to form between the owner and the service dog
He could potentially lose his dog if the company who provided it found that he removed the animal from the home. They are a UNIT. The dog is his PARTNER and since the relationship is so new, removing the animal can greatly harm their working together. That family of losers HAVE TO GO!
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i hate it when people treat animals like objects. Also, humans are the absolute worst. the niece should live on the streets instead.
Um, y'know, it's a frigging *service* animal ----- would she ask her aunt to give up a guide dog if aunt was blind? And, if the homeowner's companion animal annoys someone, then the someone can leave. My pets *stay*. Always. So did our farm animals. THey're in our care, not in our way!
To answer your question, yes. Hr wants are paramount. Just ask her and her parents.
Load More Replies... I swear to God if anyone tries to tell me what to do in my own house I'm kicking them the hell out.
Absolutely, positively, unequivocally, emphatically, entirely, infinitely NTA. Full stop.
When she voiced being uncomfortable, your brother and his wife should have talked to her to find out why she felt that way. No request should have been made to you or your husband regarding the service dog. Because your guests are acting entitled, I would tell them that they need to make other accommodations, immediately. I hope no one will try to harm the dog
Yeah, this was a chance to teach the niece empathy, which is often in short supply among teenagers, and the parents blew it.
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That kid is entitled af. That dog is medical equipment and apart of the family now. It would be traumatic for the dog to be removed etc. I'm sick and tired of people not seeing service dogs as valid medical equipment and not as family members.
So what's next? Princess Precious decides that her uncle's disability makes her "uncomfortable" and demands that he leave HIS home while she freeloads there?
Wow! Your brother asks YOU to take him in with his family and you graciously so. Now he wants YOU to put your fur baby who is a very important part of your husbands daily life, with someone else to accommodate his daughters “”uncomfortable “ feelings. What is this world coming to when”Gentle Parenting” rules. F***ing go stay somewhere else you manipulative pieces of s**t and think about someone other than your selfish needs.
Why are people down voting Mary. She is talking about OP's brother, not OP.
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But the OP's brother and his family have no relationship to the OP's FIL. The OP should tell them to leave IMO. But where they go shouldn't be her problem.
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Okay, service dog or not! If you have a dog/pet, they are a part of the family. Any other person is the guest. And guests are not going to decide who will stay at home. In this case, the dog is a necessity, but even otherwise, the dog is a part of your family and it stays. Period.
Do y'all think the niece is being influenced by her parents in order to push OP to get rid of her husband's living medical equipment? It wouldn't surprise me if the teen didn't care about the dog at all and is just following her parents and what they say behind closed doors
With the way OP said niece is acting I wouldn't be surprised if her parents are saying things to her or around her that make OPs husband sound dumb or like he can never do anything by himself, or maybe that the service dog isn't real (sorta how people see emotional support animals)? It's a complicated situation that we don't have enough answers to
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I'm allergic to dogs and I still wouldn't make someone remove their dog from their house. Claritin exists.
Thank you! I'm actually allergic to cats and dogs (mildly, I won't go into anaphylactic shock, just the sniffles), but I've never even considered getting rid of my beloved pets that I've had forever, before we found out I was allergic. Claritin and air purifiers do wonders!
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People need to set boundaries. For OP to allow her SIL to argue with her the whole time her Brother was at work and then continue with him once he came home? That's also abusive of OP. The argument should have been cut short after about 5 minutes of it with the SIL. And two words by the brother. You don't get to tag team abuse your siblings, especially when they're hosting you in their home. OP and her husband sound like very nice people. I'd recommend some books about setting boundaries. They will have happier lives if they start setting some and stick to them. It's some self love.
NTA but your brother is 100%, show him and his family the door and don't let them back in. That way you, your husband and fur baby can live peacefully and beautifully
Interesting to see they have the balls to even ask that. In India guests stay on their lane and they are respected for that. Even if it's family members we do realise that we don't hold any reservations or ask. If it was their dog troubling the kid, it would have been a different situation. Dog is more human than anyone as it helps her husband. Unless their neice is gonna take the dog's responsibility there is nothing to ask or comply. Honestly, the dog knows better than her neice does. The brother's family is all wrong in their mind depending on the culture code of the country. If in India, the situation would have been resolved in 2 hrs.
That's what decent guests do everywhere. These people just aren't of that kind, but ungrateful and demanding. They must have seen the door, though...
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Perhaps the teenager and her parents should move to a hotel since she's uncomfortable around the husband's service animal! Oh, but wait!! Hotels also serves the disabled of all kinds, including those with service animals!! So if niece spots a person with a service animal in the common areas like the lobby, and she claims it makes her "uncomfortable", are her parents gonna raise a stink and demand the hotel manager to have that guest move their animal?? (That would cause that guest to sue the hotel for discrimination.) As far as the husband offering to move in with his father, why should HE be the one to move out, especially because of his father's history of verbal abuse (calling him useless, putting him down for his infertility)?? Kudos to OP for standing up for and by her man!!!
You provide shelter for your relatives in need, and they not just make (unreasonable) demands, the SIL is yelling at you you, in your own house??? How "uncomfortable" would your husband be without the dog? Kick them out. See how comfortable that is for that entitled brat. You don't need them to stay. NTA. But your brother, including his wife and daughter, are MAJOR AHs. They wouldn't set a foot in my house ever again.
NTA. You might offer to help your niece being more accepting towards the dog, but that's all anyone could ask for, IMO. They are staying at YOUR place, not the other way. No allergies involved, just a girl who likely has no experience with dogs who feels "uncomfortable", which is often used in lack of better sounding words to say "I'm an ungrateful brat who thinks everything should revolve around her issues, no matter how unfounded they are and what hassle it imposes on others". I'm a cat person. Would never wanna live with a dog, because it just isn't a match. But, if I stayed at someone else's place, I'd never demand any of the household members being relocated, not even for a few days, without a valid and inescapable reason. That she does not have. Teach them some manners on the way, either on the way into staying, alongside the dog and the other family members, or on the way out. Their choice. Dog stays. Husband stays. You don't owe them any. Also, while not wanting to live with one or be the primary person in a dog's life, I usually enjoy their company as well ... it's just that I'm a better match with cats, no more no less. Having my cat with me, if I'm ever forced to stay at other people's place, that would likely make me opt for somewhere else (she's not great with dogs ... she doesn't even like other cats ... she has some trauma to deal with due to abusive environment in her first few months), due to cat, but that, I am to take care of, nobody else, let alone anyone having to be moved to elsewhere than their own home.
In case anyone does not understand just how well-behaved a properly trained service animal is (or wanna read a funny story) -- We all know cats and dogs tend not to get along right?? Well I have cats, and my BIL has a service dog. Sis and BIL came to visit and usually I will not let a dog into my house but made an exception cause well, medical needs. That dog sat / laid calmly by my BIL the whole time. Let the cats sniff him (the dog and BIL) and startled one of my other cats (dog was really still, cat walked by pretty close, dog lifted head, kitty jumped up about 2 feet).
TLDR; service dog behaved better than any child or adult I ever met and was nothing but an angel
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No, absolutely not and not only no, oh he// no!!! Your brother and his family are the temporary guests(what are they doing to work on that?) and the dog has bonded with your husband and you. Your husband AND the dog stay put. It’s your home; your brother is way out of line.
I'd call the niece a b***h but that woudl be a disservice to all female dogs. Unbelievable how entitled some people are! Kick the moochers out of the house. Definitely NTA. (And when has this 'xyz is making me unfcomfortable' come along? We can survive being a bit uncomfortable, now and then, There is no Godly right that we are entitled to be happy and comfortable 24/7. In fact, the better learn to live with a certain lack of comfort the more able we are to deal with a real crisis. Because they do happen)
Uncomfortable is creepy Uncle Alfred putting his hands on me, though he hasn't done anything else. Uncomfortable is not a word to use about a dog!
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Let them stay with her family or your fil. It's not up to you to rearrange your life for guests. They should be grateful or go to a hotel. Simple.
It is a service dog, ffs, and also a member of the household. As people living there temporarily, brother & co should not get to ask for a member of the household to be moved out, even temporarily, to facilitate their comfort. Not to mention, they moved months after the dog, so they must have known there would be a dog in the household before they arrived on the doorstep. I do wonder if OP has managed to get clarification on why the niece is uncomfortable with the service doggo - did she have an unsettling/dangerous encounter with a dog in the past (bite etc), is she just not used to being around dogs, or is the teen just unsettled because she is unused to a dog who is more helpful around the house than she is herself? Sounds like the way to make the teen comfortable is either to talk through her issue with the dog, or for her parents speed up their search for a new place.
Right. Obviously no one followed thru on WHY the daughter is "uncomfortable." Perhaps no one explained to her what a service dog is, and the importance of why it's in the home. Just saying the girl is uncomfortable is too broad a term. Get to the bottom of it. Is she scared of the dog, jealous of the dog? What's her story. She's got to learn to roll with it. She'll have to compromise all her life. We hope.
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I guess your husband is a hostage in this situation... pressure from both sides. It doesn't matter if it is service dog or pet. It is part of your family and household. Would they get rid of your niece because she makes dog uncomfortable? I guess not... If she is afraid of dogs, you can try to help her to find way to like your dog. Overcome her frears. Not easy. But they can find another place to live, if they are uncomfortable...
I'm just gonna toss this out here to see if it sounds right to the rest of you... I'll bet the daughter isn't uncomfortable around the dog at all. I'd lay money what's really going on is that the girl wants to per, walk, and play with the dog and has been told not to. Service dogs are working dogs and when in public wear a vest that says "Please do not per me. I am working." People always want to pet service dogs and it throws them off their game. Daughter isn't used to being told no so she went to her parents, played the victim, and started all this. Just my thoughts on the matter.
Dear niece, f**k off. Dear brother, there's the door 🚪 don't let it hit you in the a*s on your way to nearest MOTEL. People, stand up to your manipulative, TOXIC relatives. You didn't CHOOSE them & you don’t owe them ANYTHING. Nothing. Nada. Zip. ZERO. 💯
How entitled must one be to make demands when guests at someone's home? "Beggars can't be choosers" OP is far too kind. If it were me, I'd have told them to find another place to stay when hubby wanted to leave his own home to "keep the peace". Pretty shitty of the husband's father too. (However, it's not too late to get pregnant. I had my first at 33 and my second at almost 40!)
Ask your ungrateful relatives how comfortable they'd be living in their car.
As a disabled person with an Emotional Support Animal, I would NEVER allow anyone to make me give her up. She may not be a trained service animal, but she is the ONLY reason I am still breathing.
Hey Rens I just wanted to say that even tho I'm a random a*s internet person that if you ever feel like no one supports you that no matter what I'm here and I'm sure many other people are too. Sometimes that random people are the people who keep you here and that's okay! Lots of love here on BP ❤️
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The entitlement is overwhelming with this story. Can you imagine moving into someone else's house and telling them to get rid of their pet?! Wow.
Tell your family that they are causing to much stress in your house hold and remind them that there are hotels and motels to stay in until they find a new place to live. Bet you five dollars they find a place in less than a week. Stop worrying about people's feelings and speak the truth.
You live in MY house.... you need to know it is MY DOG'S house, too. Uncomfortable? Gtfo. MY dogs are not service animals and in wouldn't get rid of them because a family member LIVING RENT FREE in my home was "Uncomfortable " with them.
NTA. She is being very good to her niece giving her a roof to live under. And the girl is being ungrateful. The parents should be the ones teaching her that the world doesn't revolve around her. If you don't teach your kids the world is going to teach the hard way. And about the woman thinking is too late to have kids is not true. I had my son after 4 miscarriages when I was 41 and my husband 51. I'm proud of you for sticking out for your husband.
They would have been kicked out the moment the SIL picked a fight about it.
“One more complaint about our dog that is a medical need for my husband AND that we love, and you’re out on the street.” That’s my advice.
You are Not The A*****e!!! Your brother, wife, and nice Are The A******s!!! They are visitors. They knew the dog was there and even if they didn't, that is not there home. It is a temporary dwelling place for them. They need to find another place to live. The sooner, the better. That house is your home, your husband's home, and his service dog's home!!! They knew staying with you and your family was a temporary situation. Guests do not tell their hosts how to run their household. They may make suggestions, they Do Not Tell. Time for them to move out, the sooner, the better. Your husband needs to stay in his and your family home!!! Do not accommodate yourself to these other people. These people may be blood related to you. That does not make them family. Send Them Packing. You, your husband, and your doggy do not need those stressful people in your life. Say Goodbye and Good Riddance!!!
NTA, OP. Keep the dog and husband, get rid of the rest of the family. They're toxic as hell and I don't feel like that wonderful doggo is safe around any of them. Kick them tf out! They don't deserve to live with you and are actively harming you, your husband and your dog. Whatever happens to them after that is what they brought upon themselves.
This is wild. Yes, being an adult sibling asking for help and place to stay is a hard thing to do (my sister is my best friend and I would still struggle to ask to move into her home) BUT suck it up. You're a guest and throwing a hissy fit because of a service dog is revolting. I wonder if the BIL was visibly and physically injured would that make a difference? Not that there needs to be justification, but, you know what mate, maybe teach your daughter some manners and humility. Without your sister and her husband where would you be? What a wally!
Someone needs to educate to OP niece about the training and role of service animals and why it's not a pet. Also, being nebulously 'uncomfortable' is not an adequate explanation. Was the girl attacked or previously bitten by a dog? Is she afraid of dogs? Is this actually projected emotional issue from her current circumstances? Are her parents putting forth this narrative? Is she actually uncomfortable around her disabled uncle? Either way the OPs FIL sounds like a certificatfiable monster and her brother and SIL a real pieces of work that need to move out.
The dog lives there, the niece doesn't. All the argument you need is right there. And you know what? The niece is making ME uncomfortable
If the dog was a guide dog would the niece want you to move that out too? What a brat. Tell her get over it. The dog stays. She can go. And your father in law is another a.....e!
At Thanksgiving I was asked by my parents not to bring my Service Dog to Thanksgiving Dinner. I objected, I told my parents that not was like asking me to not bring my my right arm or wheelchair or even a Spouse and refused. This carried on to our family Christmas celebration where again I was told my Service Dog was not welcome. Again, I then said that meant I felt my family did not respect or understand me or my disability. By not coming to Christmas I was told that I ruined Christmas. I have tried to talk things out with my parents since but only to have my phone calls blocked an the front door slammed in my face. My family feels I have chosen my pet over them. They just don't get it.
Plain and simple, your brother and his family needs to get the F@$% out Now!!!!!!!!
I can't get over that your brother, and his family, dare to come into your home, and start making demands for no reason. If their daughter had allergies to your husband's Service Dog, then by all means work something out, but not for some unknown reason. As soon as I was asked to move one of my Service Dogs, I would've said that I couldn't move my Service Dogs, but they could move, but I would have only said that after they acted like they did, and while I was packing their stuff, and telling them to get out of my house, because how dare they disrespect my disabled partner?! I would've informed my brother too that I wasn't putting my neice through anything, she and they were putting her through that unnecessary mess, and yes I did value a nessary Service Dog over family, because the Service Dog knows how to behave in someone's house! I'm so glad that I'm an only child.
Pet or service animal neither goes. Don't suggest. Tell them they have two weeks to find somewhere "more comfortable"
Absolutely. The dumb animal needs to go. And she can take her mum and dad with her.
The nerve some people have. The brother and his family are being helped. If they have demands, they can shove those demands up where the sun don't shine. The owners of the house set the rules, if you don't like them, LEAVE. It matters little to me what the reason is, Service Dog? Family Pet? Medical Aid Equipment? It is the home owner's house, so their rules. The family being helped is acting entitled and like everything and everyone should bend over for them. Life is not fair, so get over it. Hearing or reading about his kind of behavior is infuriating and makes me lose faith in humanity.
Aren't service animals really hard to get? And they want OP to just get rid of it? WTF???
One person suggested family guest be told to leave at end of week. Unfortunately, they must be given 30 days unless a leave date was given when they moved in. Most rental laws, strongly support the tenet. Even when the tenet is a relative that "temporarily" moved in and is not paying anything.
Im sick to death of entitled children, and the parents who indulge them. Your precious dog deserves to be home, these mooches do not. Try a shelter, where animals arent allowed. Your husband deserves better than your self centered relatives, and his beyond belief cruel father. Stick to your guns, you are absolutely in the right
Pet or service dog - it DOES NOT matter, bc your permanent home is the dog's permanent home, and your very ungrateful, rude guests temporary home. Understand? That dog IS you and your husbands KID. I'd go straight to sheriff dept and have him serve them an eviction notice, ASAP. How long have they truly been thus far? I'm sure it's over the allotted agreed upon date. See the bigger picture, Hon. It won't stop with the dog being removed. This girl is on a power trip and is gauging everyones boundaries. Our she's simply bored and needs some family fued excitement. Regardless, she's the problem. God luck.
Your husband's oxygen means I can no longer smoke in your house. Please get rid of it! /S
The niece is the embodiment of the problem with so many people today. She is “uncomfortable” and expects others to cater to her comfort. Be uncomfortable. Growth comes from situations that aren’t comfortable. She expects the family to adapt to her and her discomfort, but has zero empathy for her disabled uncle. Get another dog! The brother, SIL, and niece can figure it out for themselves. I wouldn’t allow any guests in my home to dictate my dog’s presence. They aren’t service animals, but I wouldn’t allow anyone to relocate a hamster if I had one.
How about the entitled members stay together? Husband's dad can easily offer his place for the ingrates to stay.
NTA. You are too nice. They need to move today. Service dog or pet, they are members of your family. The audacity. They need to move to a Motel 6. The daughter will have issues as an adult. No one is setting boundaries or teaching her appreciation. She literally could be dumpster diving. Instead her aunt gave her a warm place to stay and she is complaining. Perspective....
This is just so much BS! A service dog is just that--a service dog. That dog is there for a reason, and is very much needed. Disabled people have to wait for months or years to get one. Those dogs are specially trained to not be distracted by their surroundings, to better serve their owner. So I'm betting that the dog has little contact with the girl. Maybe that's part of the problem--shes jealous of the dog. She can't even come up with a specific reason why she's upset about the animal. This couple was kind enough to take their family members into their home in their time of need, and this just seems like they get a slap in the face for doing it. Don't get rid of the dog. It's not fair. Let the brother and his family stay with other family members. And teach their daughter that she's got to roll with the punches. She's old enough to be taught that.
I want to say upfront that OP is in the right. You don't kick out a member of the family (especially one with an important job) for a guest. I'm really curious, though, what's going on with the niece. What, exactly, is making her uncomfortable? Is she afraid of dogs and know one knew? Is it something about this dog/breed? Does it force her to recognize that her uncle is disabled? Is she just trying to exert some control over her life? Whatever it is, it needs to be dealt with or it will cause bigger issues down the line.
I read things like this and wonder if it's true. How can people be so clueless? I would chuck these people out of my life, let alone my home, for the sheer fact that they are actually sponging off of this couple by living there and sharing her home and then having the audacity to wanting a disabled man to get rid of his service dog? I mean who the hell are these people? A teenager dictating to them? Get rid of these idiots from her home. Poor bloke and his dog being treated like that FFS.
Throw the whole ungrateful lot out now. Send BIL and his family to his dad's. People who have accepted the hospitality of someone's home do not get to make demands like that.
Hello? We are helping you out! I don't give a rats a*s if my niece is uncomfortable. I would kick them out immediately. What arrogant ah they are. How dare they! Sorry, this is really making me mad! WTF
The brother needs to man up and take his family to a motel or other temporary accommodation. If they have homeowner's insurance, it's almost guaranteed that there is coverage for precisely such a situation---I have coverage in my renter's insurance that if I lose my home due to no fault of my own (accidental fire, etc.), the insurance company will cut me a check for one month's rent in any hotel or motel I would want to go to (within reason, of course, but I don't live near any expensive places). It's absolutely ridiculous that his entitled 14 year old brat is allowed to even voice her opinion of her uncle's dog! Hideously childish parents, and the kid will never grow up if they don't. Nope, dog stays, relatives get booted out, period!
My service dog is also my best friend. I trained him myself, and he is a sweet, gentle, and polite dog. Nobody tells me where he belongs!! On the other hand, you have a 14 year old who has suffered a trauma. I imagine she’s feeling uprooted and concerned for her future. I think her aunt has a great opportunity to reach out to her directly. Find out about her anxiety, sometimes a gate across the door to her room is enough to give her some sense of control, which could be all she needs right now. Look at her behavior in the light of her situation. The dog probably has nothing to do with it. Maybe she needs some calm reassurance that she will always be welcome (I’d toss the adults). Maybe she’d like to go shopping and get something new, your budget allowing. Build a relationship with her directly. She’s hurting right now
There couldn't be a more teachable moment for this spoiled brat of a niece..
I'm disabled and have a cat, not a service cat but my companion who helps me over the rough days. If someone told me my cat made them uncomfortable while they are my home they would be shown the door, probably with a few words of the line "don't come back". Your neice is acting like a self entitled brat with no empathy and her parents are enabling her... she sounds like she is going to be an awful adult. Protect your husband, sounds like not to many people are on his side
The freeloader brother and his spoiled daughter can live off someone else. It's parents like this that raise entitled adults. She'll grow up to be the new Karen.. screw your medical needs, I have an unfounded emotion and am up in my feels so you gotta placate that or you're a heartless cad
What a real entitled little brat your brother is raising there. I value my pets over people and they have earned that value , most people have not. The first word in the title of this that set me off was the use of the work “it” get rid of it! It’s a living breathing life with needs and feelings and a job which the niece needs btw , dump her at a shelter and have her clean some kennels for a few weeks and build some compassion and character or at the very least give her something valuable to do since it seems like the pup is the one working hard around there . He or she doesn’t need that kids vibe around and make the puppy feel unwanted in his own home that’s disgraceful. It wouldn’t have been an argument in my house it would have been simple. No the dog is staying , you are an ungrateful group of guests and you have until sundown to be out of my house. Good luck to you , I wonder how “uncomfortable” she will feel in a homeless shelter..
They are staying with you for a short time and it’s your Husband’s dog (which he needs). There would be NO WAY I would get rid of the dog!! You’re gracious to have them there!!!!
When he asked if she valued the dog over her niece I would of said yes. The dog is working to make sure my husband stays alive what's your daughter doing other then whining about being uncomfortable?? Maybe if she got off her lazy a*s and helped find a place to live or got a job to at least help you either find a place or help with the bills around here that have increased by 3.
Excuse me? I'd tell them all to leave before changing my personal family dynamic. They are guests there and part of being a guest, is to tolerate the hosts environment.
Do not move that dog. I mean not an inch. If it is laying on the couch and the kid wants to sit sit down tell her to bad. I am over entitled ablists thinking we should give up stuff just for them. That dog might save his life. Ask that girl if she can?
I have PTSD and a service dog. Because I am a woman with no military background you would be amazed at the people who tell me my service dog is nothing more than an emotional support animal and therefore should not be allowed to be in grocery store or the restaurant or anywhere else with me. I think it's about time that those of us was service dogs educate the general public on what a service dog is and what it does what it's there for. In the past when I have been confronted, even by military veterans, I have told them to go to the Federal department of Justice. Go to the Americans with disabilities act section and look up service animals. That will explain what a service animal is what it does it will explain what our rights is handlers are what are responsibilities is handlers are. I could not get through the day without my service dog.
Sounds like a "spoiled" 14 year old, is this maybe why left old house. If feels uncomfortable, she can stay in her room. You won't be in my house ignoring me, they gotta go, hope didn't unpack
That's like saying my kid makes them uncomfortable okay there's the door bye. Why does the dog have to feel unloved. If people doesn't know dogs has feelings they are stupid.
My thing is this though how is a child going to be up in your home not talking to you? So the husband being home means he needs that dog more anyways. I'm sure the wife may work. My daughter has a service dog and my niece wanted to go to my sister's house but my mom was super tired she couldn't keep her eyes open and her sugar was dropping. So my daughter was leaving and her and her fiance offer to drop her off. She said well can you leave your dog here and take me and than come back.? No it will be a waste of time they had to go pass my sister's to get where they were going. My daughter told her that the dog sits in the front with her fiance it's where he's comfortable at. That she will be in the back by herself. She said no I am good I don't like your dog. My daughter said that's nice just remember that when you ask me for a birthday gift. She sat there and whine and scream at mom how she needs to get to my sister's. My mom wakes up asked where my daughter was I told her she said why
Didn't they drop her off. I told her she told them she doesn't like their dog even though the dog sits in the front passenger seat. My mom was pee off she got up and took her over to my sister's. My mom almost crashed my brother in law had to drive her home and they took her the car back the next day. My sister was heated. My mom has custody over my niece she feels like everyone is supposed to kiss her butt. My sister told her if our mom would have crashed she would have kicked her ungrateful self all the way to her mother's house. Kids are too entitled these days
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Selfish woman no heart.My blind husband died blind with guiding eye dog. She was dedicated to him.People who reject animals are animals themselves no respect.
NTA, NTA, NTA!!! Here's a suggestion, how about you relocate that niece and her family instead? Sounds like they aren't contributing to staying there and are now making demands as well. Another reason why I say to hell with family sometimes: my house, my rules. If it doesn't hurt the majority, it's not the problem. You on the other hand, for complaining, are!!!
I have a service dog myself and my daughters boyfriend makes commitments about him on a regular basis. I get really upset, because the dog is here to support me, let alone that we have an incredible bond with each other. The boyfriend can go first. Not cool that her family is acting like this. They are guests in the home and the dog has job to do and is a loved member of the household. Ridiculous
Wow ! I'm kinda taken back by this. You give them a free place to live and then they ask you to make changes in your house? Sounds like you brothers family are a bunch of spoiled ungrateful jerks. How uncomfortable would they be being homeless? If had a family member ask to move in my house and then had the nerve to ask me to remove my pets. I would give them some money for a hotel and tell them to leave.
I'm just wondering what kind of dog and what is so uncomfortable? We have a friend with four daughters and one of them needs accommodated with her fear of dogs or animated animals. I have actually seen (and heard) children have worse reactions than her. It is unreasonable, but... I have to say, terror. Don't matter how cute it is. I think sometimes it's because it is animate. Our friends child is getting along if the animals ignore her, no touching... She can ignore them... but she isn't quite five. She is just a Big NO.
I would not allow some spoiled 14-year old brat to make decisions like this concerning my well-being. Her problem wasn't with the dog: she has a phobia for disabled people.
I feel like this isn't totally about the dog, but how the rest of OP's family sees her and her husband and probably because of his disability. If anyone in my family wanted a disabled loved one to give up something that helped them, I'd be horrified, and yet the parents and coddling the 14 yr who is "uncomfortable" and thinking about what she's been through instead of how the person who lives in that home who relies on support could feel. The OP needs to get them out of her house immediately and perhaps look into therapy or a support group to boost her husband's confidence and help him realize while the world is harsh on those with disabilities, it's not his fault.
John Dough: Thanks for the reply to Pinkpunk143. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . What a sanctimonious load of nonsense. The one who needs to do soul searching is you if you think this is the way to engage with strangers on the internet."
Let the brother and his family stay at dad's. Or a hotel. Or on the street for that matter. You've been kind to them and they're gonna make demands about YOUR house? No phucking way.
Here's an idea...let your brother and their family go live with your husbands father. See how uncomfortable the niece is with that arrangement. This dog is a permanent fixture in the home, they are temporary. They can either leave or let it go. Also, 34 is not too late to have kids. If Halle Berry and Naomi Watts can have healthy kids in their 40's, you can too. Don't give up....
Your husband doesn’t owe anything to anyone for being disabled just like I don’t owe anyone for being a female he’s a person too he needs to stop acting like a doormat and start acting like a person who can defend himself when someone is being unfair or rude.
These freeloaders, especially the brother, are trying to establish dominance over OP and her husband. If it wasn’t the dog, it would be something else. Once they have dominance, it becomes their house and they help themselves to what ever they want. OP and her husband accommodate them and OP serves them. The brother thinks he’s entitled because she’s a woman and the husband is disabled. Nip this in the bud today. The dog stays and if they don’t like it, they can freeload somewhere else.
I see this as the fault of their parents for raising their daughter to be a spoiled, entitled brat. This is one of those times where the teen should be building character, since there's no actual danger to her. Being "uncomfortable" around a service dog is a "you" problem, not a "service dog" problem. Frankly, service dog or not, the guests are at fault here 100%.
NTA. Keep the dog where he's at, service dog or pet alike. Your house, your rules. Your brother and SIL seem to have forgotten that vital piece of information. It's YOUR house. Not theirs. The audacity of some freeloaders just blows my mind. Thinking they can just horn in and start changing all the things. Sorry they lost their house but that does not give them any power over your domain in any shape, way, or form. If they don't like it, they can leave. Plain and simple.
You are 100% on the right. Stand your ground. Sometimes I am still shocked at how completely insensitive & self absorbed some people are. You are doing them a huge favor by letting them live with you & instead of being grateful, they give you c**p. The dog stays., & nobody better even think about hurting that dog! He is a caregiver for your husband & a member of the family. A much better one than your human family members. Kick the ingrates to the curb! Tell them to get a room at a hotel.
You accommodate 3 extra people in your home and instead of gratitude they tear your family apart.
Be very careful that your family does not poison the dog in order to get rid of it. Get rid of the relatives immediately before that happens.
NTA. However I’ve seen people calling out the niece there are several resoans that she might do this and I think if you see this you may want to look into it A. Have you seen your niece complaining if not then it’s possible the brother or mother are the ones uncomfortable with the dog especially seeing as if the niece were that uncomfortable she would probably come up and say why most children would if she actually is as uncomfortable as she is allegedly saying. B. Does your niece have a bad history with dogs we hear about rabid dog attacks all the time. C.is it possible that her parents are forcing her to avoid you and keep up a possible lie maybe she doesn’t know the value of a service dog 🐕🦺 I didn’t till I read this post on bored panda I knew they had importance but never knew they could have as much as they do she might not understand how important the dog is if she doesn’t maybe you can show or tell her why it may help decrease the intensity.
Another homeless family trying to take over a family members home....I tell ya! Stop asking if you're the AH and start and start showing them the door. Even if you were the AH you're allowed to be since it is them asking to be in YOUR space.
You definitely are NTA. Hold on to your husband and his dog and ask your brother and family to leave. Your responsibilities lie with your husband, you are not your brothers keeper. P.S. I had my son at the age of 42, he is now 22 and a Wonderful young man. It was a beautiful pregnancy and the delivery was a breeze, literally! Don't give up yet, and note that stress in your life can interfere with conception, your brother and his family need to go.
A lot of these stores are creepy up lately about family staying with another family member due to hard times and then thinking they can call the shots in THEIR home. What is with people today? Get a backbone and stop trying "to keep the peace". They are lucky they even had a place to go. Kick them out and tell them good luck
She has every right to be upset. She was kind enough to give her sister a place to stay and they want to argue and try to dictate a dog that mentally helps her disabled husband. If you are in someone else's home, you don't disrespect their home. You don't complain, and you don't start trouble. I would tell her that if the dog is such am issue, go find somewhere else to stay. The niece is a child, she is not in control of the house. She will have to learn to deal with the situation. My husband and I are both disabled veterans and I understand completely the importance of that service dog. I also understand respect and actually had to ask my sister to stay with my parents for the holidays instead of us because she brought her Great Danes and we have dogs as well. She wouldn't control her dog's, she said they could do what they want, even though it was our house. I politely asked her to leave. She was upset, but eventually got over it. Stand your ground sweetheart, you got this.
You are definitely NTA. Your family is being unfair and controlling. They should be grateful that you took them in! Whether a service dog or a pet, the dog lives in your home not them. Noone would ever be allowed to shun my beloved dog. They would have to leave not her.
I have a service dog. I also don't have any family. I would do anything to have someone like this wife to support and defend me and my dog. These kinds of people are priceless beyond compare.
NTA. Your house, your family, your rules. Tell them to move in with the father and leave you and your husband in peace. Also my last child was born when I was 42 and my wife was 39. I know you said there are infertility problems but it's not too late for you to have kids. Miracles happen all the time.
Sorry but like what? Please explain how and what about this dog makes the niece uncomfortable? The size, breed, smell ? She needs educating. As for you being too old to have a baby, my first was at the tender age of 36 and number 2 was at 39. So please don't give up xxx
Very selfish on your families part to even ask you to get rid of your service dog. The dogs a necessity who helps your husband live a more normal life and a friend who can even help ease anxiety and emotional issues. Your very loving husband deserves better than that. I hope you protect him after all the times he gave everyone else what they wanted.
Tell them they have 12 hours to be gone from the house, no if's or but's. Who the fornicate do they think they are telling YOU and your husband what you can and can not have in the house. If you don't it will be, "oh we want YOUR bedroom as it is bigger" and then they will slowly take over.
Your dog is not only s service dog...he is more than a pet, he is a family member and a life saver. If your niece and her parents do not understand this, then they should leave. They should appreciate and feel grateful that you accommodated them in your home as nonpaying guests. They should drop this feeling of entitlement just bec they are relatives. They are not entitled to anything.
Your amazing service dog is a life saver and a family member as well. If your niece and her parents who are just actually nonpaying guests in your house do not understand this, then, they should leave. They should actually appreciate you accommodating them in your home. They should be grateful and not feel entitled jusy bec they are relatives.
NTA.The niece needs to be taught that respect and appreciation go a long way. Compassion for those with unique challenges, is how society moves forward, They are raising an entitled child, that few will have patience for. Also help your husband find his voice by looking into counseling, group counseling or a support group. So he can stand up to his dad. He did not choose his disability but does not have to become it either. You are both in your 30s and still very young. There's so many different ways to expand your family including short term foster care etc. Unless your husband cannot be around people or he is physically disabled, help him find meaning in his daily routine. If he Can be around people, maybe volunteer to go and read once a week at a nearby elementary school or library etc. Or take online classes from the local community College. He sounds like a sweet man with a lot of compassion and a big heart. You are a great cheerleader for him.
The fact that OP's nasty brother and his even worse family have the gall to demand that a Service Dog be removed from the home is INFURIATING! How DARE THEY demand that they modify OP's family structure! I would NEVER allow that nasty family in my home after their PRIOR ATTACK ON MY SPOUSE! I suggest OP do the same if those bastards keep it up. AH's time in OP'S home is up.
I mean.....wtf?!?! The dog isn't even bothering her???? What is with some people. If that was my child, and my sister was nice enough to let my family move in, i wouldn't have even asked her to move the dog, id tell my child to get over it and stop acting like a brat.
I wouldn't even discuss it anymore. Just saw "nah bro" every time they ask.
This is a no brainerfor this of us who have brains. NTA! What's most disturbing and shockingabout this scenario is the complete lack of awareness of both so called "adults" , the brother and his wife who clearly lack respect for others and feel a sense of entitlement and apparently that they are owed something, while also teaching bad values to their daughter. The sister in this scenario is doing her brother and his ignorant and very ungrateful wife the favor of allowing them and their daughter to stay in their home. Instead of being grateful and realizing they are guest in the sister's and her husband's home, they make demands and insult her husband. If it were me, I would politely but directly explain that their choices are to accept that both the husband and the dog live there and are not leaving and it's not up for discussion. And if this is not a workable arrangement for them, and since it's not their home, they should immediately make arrangements to stay elsewhere. The end.
OP. Your brother and SIL and your petty niece have officially worn out their welcome. You need to put your foot down hard. This is YOUR HOUSE YOUR RULES. give them one week and THATS It. Let th know under no uncertain terms this dog is must for your husband in his OWN home and you will no longer. TOLERATE their or your nieces attitude. WHAT SELFISH PEOPLE they are. GOOD luck to you.
They need to leave. Your house, your husband, your dog-service or otherwise. Period. I hope you update this and let us know what happens.
I've seen enough of these sorts of posts with ungrateful people with absurd demands that I think I'd have a difficult time allowing anyone to stay in my home for any amount of time for any reason.
You need to remind your guests that homelessness is more uncomfortable. The dog was there (His Home) when they lugged their stuff in the house. Talk about cheeky! Good for you stepping up and stopping the madness.
NTA!!! I have helped raise service dogs for a few different disabilities. They are doing a job! They are working! Have your neice get a job! That way she's away from the house and learning how work around her "uncomfortability" around dogs. Better yet! Have her work at a dog daycare! There are some out there looking for volunteers. I volunteered at an animal hospital (cleaning supplies, doing potty breaks, taking inventory, stacking food bags, working with mail, laundry) when I was 14! Rather than complaining about a dog doing a job, she can get a job of her own!
Lifelong cripple here. I don't have a dog but the niece is an entitled c**t incapable of being empathetic to others. Whether or not the dog helps at home isn't the point, he paid for it and it's his property and equipment
(OP-LIKE)"I'm sorry, your breathing offends me and your daughters clothing makes me uncomfortable, could you relocate these so my stress level comes down." (Ignorant offender). "Why should I? (OP) "I pay the bills here, when you pay them you may file a grievance with the appropriate department.; that being said I will kindly extend to you a courtesy of 3 business days to relocate or find your belongings on the lawn" Maybe that's just me...IF, I PAY the bills or my spouse does and you aren't covering the totality, you may consider a minor conversation of kind but the homeowner owes you nothing! Furthermore the correct thing to do would be to honestly humble themselves and apologize to YOU AND YOUR SPOUSE.
At 14, the niece should have learned, sand be continuing to learn how to deal with uncomfortable situations, and more importantly, that she can't salaries have things her way -especially when she's a guest at someone else's house. And it's amazingly cheeky of her and her parents to expect her husband to give up his service dog for the duration of their stay. Let us hope, for the sake of OP and Mr. OP, that their stay is of short duration. Service dogs are not pets. They are important assistants in the daily care and activities of their owners. I have a friend whose life was saved by her service dog. They are amazing canine heroes. OP and Mr OP should ask their guests to put their big on kid pants and deal with this temporary living situation, or remove themselves permanently from the home to accommodations where their entitled princess won't have to whine and pout because she can't have things her way.
I don't care if the hubs had a service skunk & they were Jesus, Mary, & the Saints..OP was wise to stand her ground. These people are abjectly pathological ( I really can't find an adjective to cover this one.) In her house...w/ her husband... who's disabled...as a favour to them...They'd be on the street, down the road, & around the corner if I were OP. Good God!
I have/train service dogs. My specialty is handlers with ptsd/sexual trauma/social anxiety and sprinkling of others. if someone told me to get rid of my dog being guests in my house it'd be time to let them find a hotel. You are right for being furious, however, if your husband wants to go elsewhere to preserve the peace you should respect that. You are fanning the flame of a conflict that is likely causing him way more trauma than he deserves. aThank you for standing up for him, but pride shouldn't make you hurt him to drive a point home to someone else.
And the trauma he'd experience in his abusive father's home? The man considers him a waste of space and isn't shy about telling him so!
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I need to add something here. I'm sorry that it took me a second read to get this. Miss Lady, you are married to one hell of a MAN!!!!!!! I wish I could meet you both. You have a good guy there. Please don't let him go. My apologies for not getting this on my first read-through. I was focused on the dog. I am now as you are focused on your husband. Please accept my apologies! Love to you all. Yes, all of ya!
I'm not even dog person I think the niece and brother's family are outta line. You are staying their home for free. Like they're family. But not everyone lucky enough to have family like that. They should be appreciative instead laying down ground rules. Secondly ,what is the dog doing that's making the niece so uncomfortable? Is the dog sniffing her crotch, I've always had that issue especially can be ackward for a preteen, like it can be pretty easily trained not to do that. Service dogs are already well trained to be pleasant around people to begin with.
Tell your brother to cowboy the blank up and tell his daughter to stop being sich a brat. I can't believe they even asked you that. That is so incredibly rude. Makes me mad.
Tell your brother to cowboy the blank up and tell his daughter to stop being such a brat. I can't believe they even asked you that. That is incredibly rude. Makes me mad.
Ntah. You allowed them to live in yout home. If they don't like the dog. Tell them to find a motel,or deal with having the dog around. Your handicapped husband is your priority here. NOT the whining bee- otches. If they don't like it there kick them out .
NTA at all! Sad that OP had to ask this. The only way they could be the a*****e is if neice was highly allergic and the family had absolutely nowhere to go, then MAYBE I'd consider getting rid of the dog but it's still iffy, but anyways that's obviously not the case. I feel bad for OPs husband
I've seen people be over dramatic and start screaming because they SEE a cat or dog, annoying but they have the right to do so. But I can only imagine the convo with someone like that about how they're going to have to get over themselves if they want to live with me and how it's unreasonable to ask someone to kick their pet out for any period of time. SMFH. Wow.
Can't believe it. No wonder the niece is so entitled if the parents have brought her up that way. It's OP's and her husband's house, their rules. The cheek...! Whatever next, "could you please go and live elsewhere as your disability makes me feel uncomfortable..?"
WTF!!@ You take these people into your home. YOUR HOME! And they tell you how it's going to be? Oh hell no. They and all there c**p would be on the curb with the door slammed in their faces. How dare they. I don't care if it's a service e dog or not. ITS YOUR HOME. These people have absolutely no respect for you or your husband. Throw them out. Now.
My opinion on this is simply: they need motivation to get themselves out of their own mess. It appears this dog will give them some. It is not your duty to bend over backwards and cave to your guests whims. A service dog is a highly trained assistant that they have no need to worry about. If they continue, buy some extra dog food, set a place for your dog, feed him semi human food and them dog food. See if that helps them get the message of who's the boss of your own home (semi-joking)
I wonder if there's something happening to the niece and she's expressing it as ill will towards the dog? Unless she just generally doesn't like dogs, I'd be a bit concerned. Definitely wouldn't give up my dog, but I would check in with the niece
I'm wondering if the girl (and maybe even the brother) is in fact uncomfortable with her uncle and is diverting this aversion to the dog - maybe even unknowingly. If the brother's family wants to stay they need some serious counseling. His behavior is very inappropriate!
I think her brother and family should find a family shelter to stay in. See how many changes they make for the thoughtless family.
--is essentially more than a pet he is a family member and a necessity to her uncle who needs him they both go hand in hand that shouldn't be hard for a teenager to comprehend they learn harder things in school. Also I can't believe the gall and nerve of the sister in law starting a yelling match in the woman's very own house she should have even more consideration and sense why the dog stays and then to have the nerve to ask this is how you show how much you care about your nieces feelings I'd tell her to get her head checked and remind her that if she cared so little for her nieces safety and comfort she wouldn't be under her roof at that very moment none of them would and that if that isn't enough to the door is right there!!!! You can just tell the sister in law the ladies brother and their teenager daughter are completely self absorbedin their feelings to the point they are ungreatful and want to make the host feel like the criminal and are disregarding everything she has done
I'm sorry but this ladies brother and his family is way out of line I cannot! Like this is ridiculous and the fact that her husband is such passive sweet heart that he is willing to go stay with his father just to keep the peace I could never allow that not the dog as a pet or for service or the spouse I'd make it clear to them that they maybe family but their under you and your husbands roof you are doing them a favor and as far as the niece she is a teenager going through motions of being one and a brat being that she is so dead set on getting he way that she has opted to ignore her aunt completely being under her roof regardless of what she is going through she needs a reality check cause obviously no one else cared enough to open their doors but the aunt did and she like other ppl commented on here would be a lot less comfortable on the streets or in a shelter! Without the niece even taking a second to talk to her aunt about what is really wrong or try understand the animal is-
Goodness! They lost their home and moved in with you?! They better respect your service dog AND your pet tarantula!
NTA! Give away your relatives fr. Such ungrateful a**holes. They should be bowing down and praising this couple for taking them in. Throw that family out with the trash.
Your house, if they don't like how it is they need to shut up and leave. The nerve and entitled behavior is over the top. The niece doesn't like the dog then she should stay away from it. Catering to her bratty behavior is just going to encourage worse from her.
Service dog or my fried-chicken-eating howler... THE DOG STAYS. Give the guests a ride to a nice hotel. Might want to warn the parents of your neice. She is exhibiting inappropriate behavior and seems to have a bit too much of a narcissism problem to be 14 years old. At 4, hope for best. At 14, wow. Is a mutt who keeps an old woman company on the couch a service dog? Hmmmm. As long as I'm not out in the world, my children and grandchildren say THAT is a service dog! 🐶🥰
If the dog dies or disappears, don't be surprised. It could also happen after they have to move out. When did their 'few weeks' begin? At the very least, the dissatisfied niece needs to find someplace else to live now . Her request and expectation to eliminate the dog is disruptive and shameful when she is a guest in your home.
Quite straightforward - stay in the house and respect the inhabitants including any pets or service animals and be grateful you've a roof over your head. Alternatively if I hear another word or see anything dodgy then you've 24hrs to leave. Touch the dog and that timeline becomes how quickly you can run.
Well now, give them 12 hours to find another kind family to take them in, or live in a motel room. The 14 year old is spoiled and selfish. God forbid they be thankful for your kindness. Tell the family that is being critical to provide for them. let them know that unless their attitude changes towards your husband's situation you're more than happy to call local authorities to assist them to vacate your premises. Sorry I have no patience for their narrow mindedness.
In my opinion BiL and family can gtfo since they are guests and they have overstayed their welcome
Sounds like your family are MAGA morons. Tell the fascists no and to move to another country if they want dictatorship
Screw the entitled nice. This is a control issue. Tell her to eff off
Hey. It's your home. Not theirs. Seems like they're not being supportive at all. Also sounds like they may be wanting to make this temporary stay an extended stay. I'd dump them at the nearest shelter.
Why on earth would you ask someone in their own home to get rid of or relocate a service dog?? Or even a pet in general? So what if husband is home, I guarantee he still needs that dog. Maybe it's a seizure dog? My friend had one that would alert her when it sensed a seizure coming on so she could lay on the ground to prepare. If he were wheelchair bound would they ask him to not use his wheelchair because it makes them uncomfortable?? They are guests in the home, I would've just asked them to leave if they don't like it. I don't care if they don't have their own home to go to at that point
They Knew this service dog was there before they moved in! The neice should have told her parents "before" they moved in that she can't be around it! If they knew before hand, and thought they could just walk over you, and have their way! Kick them to the curb! ASAP! If you don't, they will take it as a power play, and start trying to take over your home!! This is not just a service dog, it is a family member, and a friend. I'd help them find a place, or out them in a hotel. Isn't there other family they can go to on SIL side?
What amazes me the most about these is the dog was there when they moved in. They knew it was there and still asked to stay. Not like they added a nippy puppy after they moved in and the niece has a phobia (even that I'd question removing the dog, but it's the only situation I can think of where this might even warrent consideration)
NTA. If you don't want to deal with my dogs don't come to my house. You have to be mindful of your dogs and how others feel about them everywhere else including the dog park, but not at home, their home. If someone wants to be stay in the guest room they need to know the dog is part of the deal. If they don't like it they can call another relative to room with, and there shouldn't be hard feelings. I'd be like ok, you're a guest in my house and I'd really appreciate it if you would act like it. You don't get to make requests that change the way I live in my own house. You're welcome to stay and enjoy the space, but you don't get to be part of household decisions and you don't get to suggest changes. You're a guest. I love you and you're welcome but if you're truly uncomfortable you can leave. I don't mean to be mean but I'm absolutely not compromising on this.
Should have removed the neice out the house, I mean it's yours much as your husband's house and your husband health is top priority so the dog is needed around him 24/7. Just like if your neice had broken her leg and she would need crutches to get around. Your hubby needs his dog.
One thing to consider is that the niece may be traumatized by losing her home, and her way of dealing with the loss is by trying to control her new environment. If so, the adults fighting would just make it worse. Perhaps the solution is some sort of therapy for the daughter.
So the niece is uncomfortable. How do you think the husband feels? What about his comfort? They lost their home so they want to take the husband's?
Unlikely to be a popular opinion, but that's ok. This is just another example of a man failing his family and a family failing their kid. This teenager thinks her opinion matters and her part are caving to her demands!!! Who is in charge? If there was any discipline in the Brothers house this would have been a non issue from the start.
Wowza, what a bunch of entitled asses! I would pack their stuff and kick them out. They can find somewhere else to stay where they can be "comfortable". Will be interesting to see how they deal with the their incredibly spoiled and manipulating 14 yr old as she gets older and increasingly entitled. Good luck with that. Don't let them or anyone bully you, stand your ground and bid them adieu.
If the kid is afraid of dogs, just have her admit it and then they can move forward with it. A service dog is a great way of dealing with a fear of dogs as they are calm and obey commands and can help with aversion therapy. Otherwise, if the dog is trained correctly then it shouldn't be jumping on people then I don't see why else she would be uncomfortable.
How incredibly thoughtless, entitled, and astoundingly rude of those people. Your family!! I'd kick them out immediately, and it would be a long time before I saw them again. Waiting for an apology........
The niece and parents have to leave. Go pat for a Motel 6. They should be grateful they are not homeless. You are NTA. I sure would be, because I would have asked them to leave the first time that request was uttered. And they are arguing, disturbing the peace of your home. They gotta go.
The dog could be removed after the niece completes dog training and is capable of preforming the duties. Then agrees and demonstrates proficiency.
I had some strong feelings about this. So much so I felt it necessary to go to the OP to comment directly to the post. Although, I know my comment will never be read, as it is buried under 10k+ comments lol. Anyway, I'll say the same here too. Anybody who would, without a legitimate reason, ask a person to move out a family member is just a messed up person. It's wrong! Especially when asking for one to be removed forces another family member to go with them. Hubby and doggo are a package deal. The niece, SIL, and bro have no right to make a demand like that. Maybe it would be more understandable if doggo induced allergies or was aggressive but since that is not the case, those mooches can either go get a hotel or shut up and be grateful that family is willing to put them up cost free until they get on their feet.
This dog is a surface animal, which is like medical equipment. You cannot say “hack, please quit using oxygen so I can smoke.“ The niece is entitled and needs to calm down. Maybe she could serve meals in a homeless shelter for a while to find out what she’s being saved from. Talk about uncomfortable. Also, even if it were a pet, unless it bit for no reason, There was no way that I would rehome it for my niece, and most certainly would not rehome my husband.
Is it really the dog the niece is "uncomfortable" with? Or is it that she's been listening to other people saying the words you husband's father has said out loud, just trying to not sound like the absolute a$$'s they are?
What's with the ppl on AITA that move to someone's house and make demands? Is that a trend now?
The audacity of some people absolutely blows my mind!!!! Can you imagine?! Begging for a place to live and then bitching about it ?? Unbelievable!
If someone took my family and I in out of the goodness of their hearts, I would not be complaining. These ungrateful idiots even said it’s temporary. Yes, it’s temporary for THEM, not the OP and her husband, whose house it is the relatives are temporarily staying in. If you are a guest staying somewhere for FREE, you do not get to dictate the terms of your stay. Their house, their rules. Your house, your rules. Brother and family need to STFU, and look for a home of their own, then move out—-QUICK.
Am I the a*****e? If you can't even say the name of the forum maybe stop posting their content.
You don't have to click on these articles you know.
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If anything shall happen to her because of the dog you will have to live with that for the rest of your life. Dogs sense more than humans. Find out if she fears for her safety. I wouldn't imagine she would say anything if it wasn't for fear. This type of dog in the photo looks like a boxer...dangerous breed. One more thing...have you had him since he was a puppy? If not then you really don't know him...PS... People are cruel in their comments. If you care for him and her just separate them while she's around. There is most likely enough space in your home to accommodate your needs and your extended family's needs.
1. The family could get a hotel 2. The uncle's service dog comes before the niece's comfort 3. I don't that's the actual dog.
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What sort of info would make this ok? If the dog was just a pet it STILL wouldn't make the behavior from the guests ok. I'll never understand you people who go out of your way to defend the indefensible.
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Asking the aunt to "relocate the dog" is stupid too.
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Everybody keeps saying that it's a service dog and not a pet, but I wouldn't give away my pets in this situation either. They are my pets, my family members, I'm responsible for them. I'm not giving up them because my bratty teenage niece is "uncomfortable". Would she be more comfortable living on the streets?
You are right. The point is, that even if you don't get the pet owner perpective (let's be real:not everybody understands the importance of pets) at least they should understand the medical part.
Load More Replies... „Yelling about how I value a dog over my niece and her comfort“ „ He said that I was being unsupportive and cruel to my niece who's already been through enough“ Don‘t you „love“ it when people accuse others of things they themselves are actively doing, in order to get their way?
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 for not moving your dog. You are doing them a favor having them in your house. they should appreciate that.
Imagine this: you're about to end up homeless, your sister is gracious enough to save you and let's you move in and you a...e have the audacity to demand her to get rid of her sick/ disabled husband's very much needed assistance dog for no valid reason. Gosh, shut up and be grateful for the help you are provided or go and live on the streets or in a shelter.
Right? I've been homeless and stayed in places with people I couldn't stand, but you better believe I kept my mouth shut and pretended I loved every minute of it until I could do something different bc I was grateful to be there regardless.
Load More Replies... Try teaching fúcking entitled kids and parents like this. They are in every class now. Teachers -- thanks for your service (it's, "domestic peace corps").
Load More Replies... Your house, your rules. They knew it up front right? Relocate the dog? “There’s the door dearest brother, if your daughter feels uncomfortable feel free to leave. O wait, you got nowhere else to go? Then tell your daughter to just ignore the dog.” The dog, service dog or not, stays. No matter what.
Your first sentence is it. THE point! Learn it and repeat it while you are young enough to enforce it. Once you're my age.... well, I have a big walking stick and had a nice size (if somewhat older) dog. I can use that cane and my furry baby always knew precisely whose home it was and exactly who did belonged here. I miss him. Sorry.
Load More Replies... I need an update from the OP. I hope she told her brother & his ungrateful a*s family to GTFO
Right? I'm dying to know what happened next. Did she tell them to get out? Did they leave quietly? Doubt it. And what about the dog makes her "uncomfortable"? I have so many questions.....
Load More Replies... The dog is not just a dog, he is medical equipment. You don't get rid of someone's medical equipment. I don't know what this girl's problem is but she needs to grow up and her parents need to stop trying to cater to her. She is a guest in someone else's home and doesn't get to make decisions about what goes on in the house. If they are this unhappy, then they need to find somewhere else to stay.
Absolutely the husband and dog stay. For all the reasons everyone has said. The brother and his family are being ungrateful and beyond entitled. They knew the dog was there before they came to stay, but gladly accepted the help. They are all kinds of sketchy. They need to go asap!
It's a service dog, ffs, not a pet. And it's a member of the immediate family who lives there. They want the disabled man who's house it is, and his dog to go stay elsewhere simply because the spoiled teenager says so? Seriously. The peop,e ate already imposing by staying there. Now they see no problem makig one of the people who is got enough to let them syst there, leave. What tf is won with the people. The wife is right, it's their home. The teen needs to stick it up and deal with the fact that it's not her place and she has no right to ask that of them. Her parents are self absorbed jack-azzes and are raising another one. KICK THEM OUT!
Does not matter. My pets would not be kicked out because some mooching twat wad "uncomfortable " with them. My home is their home. I rescued them and would not dump them for a stupid reason like that.
Load More Replies... All the other arguments aside (which I fully support btw) it's crucial that the service dogs stays in the family, especially since it's only been there for 4 months, because you want and need a special bond to form between the owner and the service dog
He could potentially lose his dog if the company who provided it found that he removed the animal from the home. They are a UNIT. The dog is his PARTNER and since the relationship is so new, removing the animal can greatly harm their working together. That family of losers HAVE TO GO!
Load More Replies... i hate it when people treat animals like objects. Also, humans are the absolute worst. the niece should live on the streets instead.
Um, y'know, it's a frigging *service* animal ----- would she ask her aunt to give up a guide dog if aunt was blind? And, if the homeowner's companion animal annoys someone, then the someone can leave. My pets *stay*. Always. So did our farm animals. THey're in our care, not in our way!
To answer your question, yes. Hr wants are paramount. Just ask her and her parents.
Load More Replies... I swear to God if anyone tries to tell me what to do in my own house I'm kicking them the hell out.
Absolutely, positively, unequivocally, emphatically, entirely, infinitely NTA. Full stop.
When she voiced being uncomfortable, your brother and his wife should have talked to her to find out why she felt that way. No request should have been made to you or your husband regarding the service dog. Because your guests are acting entitled, I would tell them that they need to make other accommodations, immediately. I hope no one will try to harm the dog
Yeah, this was a chance to teach the niece empathy, which is often in short supply among teenagers, and the parents blew it.
Load More Replies... That kid is entitled af. That dog is medical equipment and apart of the family now. It would be traumatic for the dog to be removed etc. I'm sick and tired of people not seeing service dogs as valid medical equipment and not as family members.
So what's next? Princess Precious decides that her uncle's disability makes her "uncomfortable" and demands that he leave HIS home while she freeloads there?
Wow! Your brother asks YOU to take him in with his family and you graciously so. Now he wants YOU to put your fur baby who is a very important part of your husbands daily life, with someone else to accommodate his daughters “”uncomfortable “ feelings. What is this world coming to when”Gentle Parenting” rules. F***ing go stay somewhere else you manipulative pieces of s**t and think about someone other than your selfish needs.
Why are people down voting Mary. She is talking about OP's brother, not OP.
Load More Replies... But the OP's brother and his family have no relationship to the OP's FIL. The OP should tell them to leave IMO. But where they go shouldn't be her problem.
Load More Replies... Okay, service dog or not! If you have a dog/pet, they are a part of the family. Any other person is the guest. And guests are not going to decide who will stay at home. In this case, the dog is a necessity, but even otherwise, the dog is a part of your family and it stays. Period.
Do y'all think the niece is being influenced by her parents in order to push OP to get rid of her husband's living medical equipment? It wouldn't surprise me if the teen didn't care about the dog at all and is just following her parents and what they say behind closed doors
With the way OP said niece is acting I wouldn't be surprised if her parents are saying things to her or around her that make OPs husband sound dumb or like he can never do anything by himself, or maybe that the service dog isn't real (sorta how people see emotional support animals)? It's a complicated situation that we don't have enough answers to
Load More Replies... I'm allergic to dogs and I still wouldn't make someone remove their dog from their house. Claritin exists.
Thank you! I'm actually allergic to cats and dogs (mildly, I won't go into anaphylactic shock, just the sniffles), but I've never even considered getting rid of my beloved pets that I've had forever, before we found out I was allergic. Claritin and air purifiers do wonders!
Load More Replies... People need to set boundaries. For OP to allow her SIL to argue with her the whole time her Brother was at work and then continue with him once he came home? That's also abusive of OP. The argument should have been cut short after about 5 minutes of it with the SIL. And two words by the brother. You don't get to tag team abuse your siblings, especially when they're hosting you in their home. OP and her husband sound like very nice people. I'd recommend some books about setting boundaries. They will have happier lives if they start setting some and stick to them. It's some self love.
NTA but your brother is 100%, show him and his family the door and don't let them back in. That way you, your husband and fur baby can live peacefully and beautifully
Interesting to see they have the balls to even ask that. In India guests stay on their lane and they are respected for that. Even if it's family members we do realise that we don't hold any reservations or ask. If it was their dog troubling the kid, it would have been a different situation. Dog is more human than anyone as it helps her husband. Unless their neice is gonna take the dog's responsibility there is nothing to ask or comply. Honestly, the dog knows better than her neice does. The brother's family is all wrong in their mind depending on the culture code of the country. If in India, the situation would have been resolved in 2 hrs.
That's what decent guests do everywhere. These people just aren't of that kind, but ungrateful and demanding. They must have seen the door, though...
Load More Replies... Perhaps the teenager and her parents should move to a hotel since she's uncomfortable around the husband's service animal! Oh, but wait!! Hotels also serves the disabled of all kinds, including those with service animals!! So if niece spots a person with a service animal in the common areas like the lobby, and she claims it makes her "uncomfortable", are her parents gonna raise a stink and demand the hotel manager to have that guest move their animal?? (That would cause that guest to sue the hotel for discrimination.) As far as the husband offering to move in with his father, why should HE be the one to move out, especially because of his father's history of verbal abuse (calling him useless, putting him down for his infertility)?? Kudos to OP for standing up for and by her man!!!
You provide shelter for your relatives in need, and they not just make (unreasonable) demands, the SIL is yelling at you you, in your own house??? How "uncomfortable" would your husband be without the dog? Kick them out. See how comfortable that is for that entitled brat. You don't need them to stay. NTA. But your brother, including his wife and daughter, are MAJOR AHs. They wouldn't set a foot in my house ever again.
NTA. You might offer to help your niece being more accepting towards the dog, but that's all anyone could ask for, IMO. They are staying at YOUR place, not the other way. No allergies involved, just a girl who likely has no experience with dogs who feels "uncomfortable", which is often used in lack of better sounding words to say "I'm an ungrateful brat who thinks everything should revolve around her issues, no matter how unfounded they are and what hassle it imposes on others". I'm a cat person. Would never wanna live with a dog, because it just isn't a match. But, if I stayed at someone else's place, I'd never demand any of the household members being relocated, not even for a few days, without a valid and inescapable reason. That she does not have. Teach them some manners on the way, either on the way into staying, alongside the dog and the other family members, or on the way out. Their choice. Dog stays. Husband stays. You don't owe them any. Also, while not wanting to live with one or be the primary person in a dog's life, I usually enjoy their company as well ... it's just that I'm a better match with cats, no more no less. Having my cat with me, if I'm ever forced to stay at other people's place, that would likely make me opt for somewhere else (she's not great with dogs ... she doesn't even like other cats ... she has some trauma to deal with due to abusive environment in her first few months), due to cat, but that, I am to take care of, nobody else, let alone anyone having to be moved to elsewhere than their own home.
In case anyone does not understand just how well-behaved a properly trained service animal is (or wanna read a funny story) -- We all know cats and dogs tend not to get along right?? Well I have cats, and my BIL has a service dog. Sis and BIL came to visit and usually I will not let a dog into my house but made an exception cause well, medical needs. That dog sat / laid calmly by my BIL the whole time. Let the cats sniff him (the dog and BIL) and startled one of my other cats (dog was really still, cat walked by pretty close, dog lifted head, kitty jumped up about 2 feet).
TLDR; service dog behaved better than any child or adult I ever met and was nothing but an angel
Load More Replies... No, absolutely not and not only no, oh he// no!!! Your brother and his family are the temporary guests(what are they doing to work on that?) and the dog has bonded with your husband and you. Your husband AND the dog stay put. It’s your home; your brother is way out of line.
I'd call the niece a b***h but that woudl be a disservice to all female dogs. Unbelievable how entitled some people are! Kick the moochers out of the house. Definitely NTA. (And when has this 'xyz is making me unfcomfortable' come along? We can survive being a bit uncomfortable, now and then, There is no Godly right that we are entitled to be happy and comfortable 24/7. In fact, the better learn to live with a certain lack of comfort the more able we are to deal with a real crisis. Because they do happen)
Uncomfortable is creepy Uncle Alfred putting his hands on me, though he hasn't done anything else. Uncomfortable is not a word to use about a dog!
Load More Replies... Let them stay with her family or your fil. It's not up to you to rearrange your life for guests. They should be grateful or go to a hotel. Simple.
It is a service dog, ffs, and also a member of the household. As people living there temporarily, brother & co should not get to ask for a member of the household to be moved out, even temporarily, to facilitate their comfort. Not to mention, they moved months after the dog, so they must have known there would be a dog in the household before they arrived on the doorstep. I do wonder if OP has managed to get clarification on why the niece is uncomfortable with the service doggo - did she have an unsettling/dangerous encounter with a dog in the past (bite etc), is she just not used to being around dogs, or is the teen just unsettled because she is unused to a dog who is more helpful around the house than she is herself? Sounds like the way to make the teen comfortable is either to talk through her issue with the dog, or for her parents speed up their search for a new place.
Right. Obviously no one followed thru on WHY the daughter is "uncomfortable." Perhaps no one explained to her what a service dog is, and the importance of why it's in the home. Just saying the girl is uncomfortable is too broad a term. Get to the bottom of it. Is she scared of the dog, jealous of the dog? What's her story. She's got to learn to roll with it. She'll have to compromise all her life. We hope.
Load More Replies... I guess your husband is a hostage in this situation... pressure from both sides. It doesn't matter if it is service dog or pet. It is part of your family and household. Would they get rid of your niece because she makes dog uncomfortable? I guess not... If she is afraid of dogs, you can try to help her to find way to like your dog. Overcome her frears. Not easy. But they can find another place to live, if they are uncomfortable...
I'm just gonna toss this out here to see if it sounds right to the rest of you... I'll bet the daughter isn't uncomfortable around the dog at all. I'd lay money what's really going on is that the girl wants to per, walk, and play with the dog and has been told not to. Service dogs are working dogs and when in public wear a vest that says "Please do not per me. I am working." People always want to pet service dogs and it throws them off their game. Daughter isn't used to being told no so she went to her parents, played the victim, and started all this. Just my thoughts on the matter.
Dear niece, f**k off. Dear brother, there's the door 🚪 don't let it hit you in the a*s on your way to nearest MOTEL. People, stand up to your manipulative, TOXIC relatives. You didn't CHOOSE them & you don’t owe them ANYTHING. Nothing. Nada. Zip. ZERO. 💯
How entitled must one be to make demands when guests at someone's home? "Beggars can't be choosers" OP is far too kind. If it were me, I'd have told them to find another place to stay when hubby wanted to leave his own home to "keep the peace". Pretty shitty of the husband's father too. (However, it's not too late to get pregnant. I had my first at 33 and my second at almost 40!)
Ask your ungrateful relatives how comfortable they'd be living in their car.
As a disabled person with an Emotional Support Animal, I would NEVER allow anyone to make me give her up. She may not be a trained service animal, but she is the ONLY reason I am still breathing.
Hey Rens I just wanted to say that even tho I'm a random a*s internet person that if you ever feel like no one supports you that no matter what I'm here and I'm sure many other people are too. Sometimes that random people are the people who keep you here and that's okay! Lots of love here on BP ❤️
Load More Replies... The entitlement is overwhelming with this story. Can you imagine moving into someone else's house and telling them to get rid of their pet?! Wow.
Tell your family that they are causing to much stress in your house hold and remind them that there are hotels and motels to stay in until they find a new place to live. Bet you five dollars they find a place in less than a week. Stop worrying about people's feelings and speak the truth.
You live in MY house.... you need to know it is MY DOG'S house, too. Uncomfortable? Gtfo. MY dogs are not service animals and in wouldn't get rid of them because a family member LIVING RENT FREE in my home was "Uncomfortable " with them.
NTA. She is being very good to her niece giving her a roof to live under. And the girl is being ungrateful. The parents should be the ones teaching her that the world doesn't revolve around her. If you don't teach your kids the world is going to teach the hard way. And about the woman thinking is too late to have kids is not true. I had my son after 4 miscarriages when I was 41 and my husband 51. I'm proud of you for sticking out for your husband.
They would have been kicked out the moment the SIL picked a fight about it.
“One more complaint about our dog that is a medical need for my husband AND that we love, and you’re out on the street.” That’s my advice.
You are Not The A*****e!!! Your brother, wife, and nice Are The A******s!!! They are visitors. They knew the dog was there and even if they didn't, that is not there home. It is a temporary dwelling place for them. They need to find another place to live. The sooner, the better. That house is your home, your husband's home, and his service dog's home!!! They knew staying with you and your family was a temporary situation. Guests do not tell their hosts how to run their household. They may make suggestions, they Do Not Tell. Time for them to move out, the sooner, the better. Your husband needs to stay in his and your family home!!! Do not accommodate yourself to these other people. These people may be blood related to you. That does not make them family. Send Them Packing. You, your husband, and your doggy do not need those stressful people in your life. Say Goodbye and Good Riddance!!!
NTA, OP. Keep the dog and husband, get rid of the rest of the family. They're toxic as hell and I don't feel like that wonderful doggo is safe around any of them. Kick them tf out! They don't deserve to live with you and are actively harming you, your husband and your dog. Whatever happens to them after that is what they brought upon themselves.
This is wild. Yes, being an adult sibling asking for help and place to stay is a hard thing to do (my sister is my best friend and I would still struggle to ask to move into her home) BUT suck it up. You're a guest and throwing a hissy fit because of a service dog is revolting. I wonder if the BIL was visibly and physically injured would that make a difference? Not that there needs to be justification, but, you know what mate, maybe teach your daughter some manners and humility. Without your sister and her husband where would you be? What a wally!
Someone needs to educate to OP niece about the training and role of service animals and why it's not a pet. Also, being nebulously 'uncomfortable' is not an adequate explanation. Was the girl attacked or previously bitten by a dog? Is she afraid of dogs? Is this actually projected emotional issue from her current circumstances? Are her parents putting forth this narrative? Is she actually uncomfortable around her disabled uncle? Either way the OPs FIL sounds like a certificatfiable monster and her brother and SIL a real pieces of work that need to move out.
The dog lives there, the niece doesn't. All the argument you need is right there. And you know what? The niece is making ME uncomfortable
If the dog was a guide dog would the niece want you to move that out too? What a brat. Tell her get over it. The dog stays. She can go. And your father in law is another a.....e!
At Thanksgiving I was asked by my parents not to bring my Service Dog to Thanksgiving Dinner. I objected, I told my parents that not was like asking me to not bring my my right arm or wheelchair or even a Spouse and refused. This carried on to our family Christmas celebration where again I was told my Service Dog was not welcome. Again, I then said that meant I felt my family did not respect or understand me or my disability. By not coming to Christmas I was told that I ruined Christmas. I have tried to talk things out with my parents since but only to have my phone calls blocked an the front door slammed in my face. My family feels I have chosen my pet over them. They just don't get it.
Plain and simple, your brother and his family needs to get the F@$% out Now!!!!!!!!
I can't get over that your brother, and his family, dare to come into your home, and start making demands for no reason. If their daughter had allergies to your husband's Service Dog, then by all means work something out, but not for some unknown reason. As soon as I was asked to move one of my Service Dogs, I would've said that I couldn't move my Service Dogs, but they could move, but I would have only said that after they acted like they did, and while I was packing their stuff, and telling them to get out of my house, because how dare they disrespect my disabled partner?! I would've informed my brother too that I wasn't putting my neice through anything, she and they were putting her through that unnecessary mess, and yes I did value a nessary Service Dog over family, because the Service Dog knows how to behave in someone's house! I'm so glad that I'm an only child.
Pet or service animal neither goes. Don't suggest. Tell them they have two weeks to find somewhere "more comfortable"
Absolutely. The dumb animal needs to go. And she can take her mum and dad with her.
The nerve some people have. The brother and his family are being helped. If they have demands, they can shove those demands up where the sun don't shine. The owners of the house set the rules, if you don't like them, LEAVE. It matters little to me what the reason is, Service Dog? Family Pet? Medical Aid Equipment? It is the home owner's house, so their rules. The family being helped is acting entitled and like everything and everyone should bend over for them. Life is not fair, so get over it. Hearing or reading about his kind of behavior is infuriating and makes me lose faith in humanity.
Aren't service animals really hard to get? And they want OP to just get rid of it? WTF???
One person suggested family guest be told to leave at end of week. Unfortunately, they must be given 30 days unless a leave date was given when they moved in. Most rental laws, strongly support the tenet. Even when the tenet is a relative that "temporarily" moved in and is not paying anything.
Im sick to death of entitled children, and the parents who indulge them. Your precious dog deserves to be home, these mooches do not. Try a shelter, where animals arent allowed. Your husband deserves better than your self centered relatives, and his beyond belief cruel father. Stick to your guns, you are absolutely in the right
Pet or service dog - it DOES NOT matter, bc your permanent home is the dog's permanent home, and your very ungrateful, rude guests temporary home. Understand? That dog IS you and your husbands KID. I'd go straight to sheriff dept and have him serve them an eviction notice, ASAP. How long have they truly been thus far? I'm sure it's over the allotted agreed upon date. See the bigger picture, Hon. It won't stop with the dog being removed. This girl is on a power trip and is gauging everyones boundaries. Our she's simply bored and needs some family fued excitement. Regardless, she's the problem. God luck.
Your husband's oxygen means I can no longer smoke in your house. Please get rid of it! /S
The niece is the embodiment of the problem with so many people today. She is “uncomfortable” and expects others to cater to her comfort. Be uncomfortable. Growth comes from situations that aren’t comfortable. She expects the family to adapt to her and her discomfort, but has zero empathy for her disabled uncle. Get another dog! The brother, SIL, and niece can figure it out for themselves. I wouldn’t allow any guests in my home to dictate my dog’s presence. They aren’t service animals, but I wouldn’t allow anyone to relocate a hamster if I had one.
How about the entitled members stay together? Husband's dad can easily offer his place for the ingrates to stay.
NTA. You are too nice. They need to move today. Service dog or pet, they are members of your family. The audacity. They need to move to a Motel 6. The daughter will have issues as an adult. No one is setting boundaries or teaching her appreciation. She literally could be dumpster diving. Instead her aunt gave her a warm place to stay and she is complaining. Perspective....
This is just so much BS! A service dog is just that--a service dog. That dog is there for a reason, and is very much needed. Disabled people have to wait for months or years to get one. Those dogs are specially trained to not be distracted by their surroundings, to better serve their owner. So I'm betting that the dog has little contact with the girl. Maybe that's part of the problem--shes jealous of the dog. She can't even come up with a specific reason why she's upset about the animal. This couple was kind enough to take their family members into their home in their time of need, and this just seems like they get a slap in the face for doing it. Don't get rid of the dog. It's not fair. Let the brother and his family stay with other family members. And teach their daughter that she's got to roll with the punches. She's old enough to be taught that.
I want to say upfront that OP is in the right. You don't kick out a member of the family (especially one with an important job) for a guest. I'm really curious, though, what's going on with the niece. What, exactly, is making her uncomfortable? Is she afraid of dogs and know one knew? Is it something about this dog/breed? Does it force her to recognize that her uncle is disabled? Is she just trying to exert some control over her life? Whatever it is, it needs to be dealt with or it will cause bigger issues down the line.
I read things like this and wonder if it's true. How can people be so clueless? I would chuck these people out of my life, let alone my home, for the sheer fact that they are actually sponging off of this couple by living there and sharing her home and then having the audacity to wanting a disabled man to get rid of his service dog? I mean who the hell are these people? A teenager dictating to them? Get rid of these idiots from her home. Poor bloke and his dog being treated like that FFS.
Throw the whole ungrateful lot out now. Send BIL and his family to his dad's. People who have accepted the hospitality of someone's home do not get to make demands like that.
Hello? We are helping you out! I don't give a rats a*s if my niece is uncomfortable. I would kick them out immediately. What arrogant ah they are. How dare they! Sorry, this is really making me mad! WTF
The brother needs to man up and take his family to a motel or other temporary accommodation. If they have homeowner's insurance, it's almost guaranteed that there is coverage for precisely such a situation---I have coverage in my renter's insurance that if I lose my home due to no fault of my own (accidental fire, etc.), the insurance company will cut me a check for one month's rent in any hotel or motel I would want to go to (within reason, of course, but I don't live near any expensive places). It's absolutely ridiculous that his entitled 14 year old brat is allowed to even voice her opinion of her uncle's dog! Hideously childish parents, and the kid will never grow up if they don't. Nope, dog stays, relatives get booted out, period!
My service dog is also my best friend. I trained him myself, and he is a sweet, gentle, and polite dog. Nobody tells me where he belongs!! On the other hand, you have a 14 year old who has suffered a trauma. I imagine she’s feeling uprooted and concerned for her future. I think her aunt has a great opportunity to reach out to her directly. Find out about her anxiety, sometimes a gate across the door to her room is enough to give her some sense of control, which could be all she needs right now. Look at her behavior in the light of her situation. The dog probably has nothing to do with it. Maybe she needs some calm reassurance that she will always be welcome (I’d toss the adults). Maybe she’d like to go shopping and get something new, your budget allowing. Build a relationship with her directly. She’s hurting right now
There couldn't be a more teachable moment for this spoiled brat of a niece..
I'm disabled and have a cat, not a service cat but my companion who helps me over the rough days. If someone told me my cat made them uncomfortable while they are my home they would be shown the door, probably with a few words of the line "don't come back". Your neice is acting like a self entitled brat with no empathy and her parents are enabling her... she sounds like she is going to be an awful adult. Protect your husband, sounds like not to many people are on his side
The freeloader brother and his spoiled daughter can live off someone else. It's parents like this that raise entitled adults. She'll grow up to be the new Karen.. screw your medical needs, I have an unfounded emotion and am up in my feels so you gotta placate that or you're a heartless cad
What a real entitled little brat your brother is raising there. I value my pets over people and they have earned that value , most people have not. The first word in the title of this that set me off was the use of the work “it” get rid of it! It’s a living breathing life with needs and feelings and a job which the niece needs btw , dump her at a shelter and have her clean some kennels for a few weeks and build some compassion and character or at the very least give her something valuable to do since it seems like the pup is the one working hard around there . He or she doesn’t need that kids vibe around and make the puppy feel unwanted in his own home that’s disgraceful. It wouldn’t have been an argument in my house it would have been simple. No the dog is staying , you are an ungrateful group of guests and you have until sundown to be out of my house. Good luck to you , I wonder how “uncomfortable” she will feel in a homeless shelter..
They are staying with you for a short time and it’s your Husband’s dog (which he needs). There would be NO WAY I would get rid of the dog!! You’re gracious to have them there!!!!
When he asked if she valued the dog over her niece I would of said yes. The dog is working to make sure my husband stays alive what's your daughter doing other then whining about being uncomfortable?? Maybe if she got off her lazy a*s and helped find a place to live or got a job to at least help you either find a place or help with the bills around here that have increased by 3.
Excuse me? I'd tell them all to leave before changing my personal family dynamic. They are guests there and part of being a guest, is to tolerate the hosts environment.
Do not move that dog. I mean not an inch. If it is laying on the couch and the kid wants to sit sit down tell her to bad. I am over entitled ablists thinking we should give up stuff just for them. That dog might save his life. Ask that girl if she can?
I have PTSD and a service dog. Because I am a woman with no military background you would be amazed at the people who tell me my service dog is nothing more than an emotional support animal and therefore should not be allowed to be in grocery store or the restaurant or anywhere else with me. I think it's about time that those of us was service dogs educate the general public on what a service dog is and what it does what it's there for. In the past when I have been confronted, even by military veterans, I have told them to go to the Federal department of Justice. Go to the Americans with disabilities act section and look up service animals. That will explain what a service animal is what it does it will explain what our rights is handlers are what are responsibilities is handlers are. I could not get through the day without my service dog.
Sounds like a "spoiled" 14 year old, is this maybe why left old house. If feels uncomfortable, she can stay in her room. You won't be in my house ignoring me, they gotta go, hope didn't unpack
That's like saying my kid makes them uncomfortable okay there's the door bye. Why does the dog have to feel unloved. If people doesn't know dogs has feelings they are stupid.
My thing is this though how is a child going to be up in your home not talking to you? So the husband being home means he needs that dog more anyways. I'm sure the wife may work. My daughter has a service dog and my niece wanted to go to my sister's house but my mom was super tired she couldn't keep her eyes open and her sugar was dropping. So my daughter was leaving and her and her fiance offer to drop her off. She said well can you leave your dog here and take me and than come back.? No it will be a waste of time they had to go pass my sister's to get where they were going. My daughter told her that the dog sits in the front with her fiance it's where he's comfortable at. That she will be in the back by herself. She said no I am good I don't like your dog. My daughter said that's nice just remember that when you ask me for a birthday gift. She sat there and whine and scream at mom how she needs to get to my sister's. My mom wakes up asked where my daughter was I told her she said why
Didn't they drop her off. I told her she told them she doesn't like their dog even though the dog sits in the front passenger seat. My mom was pee off she got up and took her over to my sister's. My mom almost crashed my brother in law had to drive her home and they took her the car back the next day. My sister was heated. My mom has custody over my niece she feels like everyone is supposed to kiss her butt. My sister told her if our mom would have crashed she would have kicked her ungrateful self all the way to her mother's house. Kids are too entitled these days
Load More Replies... Selfish woman no heart.My blind husband died blind with guiding eye dog. She was dedicated to him.People who reject animals are animals themselves no respect.
NTA, NTA, NTA!!! Here's a suggestion, how about you relocate that niece and her family instead? Sounds like they aren't contributing to staying there and are now making demands as well. Another reason why I say to hell with family sometimes: my house, my rules. If it doesn't hurt the majority, it's not the problem. You on the other hand, for complaining, are!!!
I have a service dog myself and my daughters boyfriend makes commitments about him on a regular basis. I get really upset, because the dog is here to support me, let alone that we have an incredible bond with each other. The boyfriend can go first. Not cool that her family is acting like this. They are guests in the home and the dog has job to do and is a loved member of the household. Ridiculous
Wow ! I'm kinda taken back by this. You give them a free place to live and then they ask you to make changes in your house? Sounds like you brothers family are a bunch of spoiled ungrateful jerks. How uncomfortable would they be being homeless? If had a family member ask to move in my house and then had the nerve to ask me to remove my pets. I would give them some money for a hotel and tell them to leave.
I'm just wondering what kind of dog and what is so uncomfortable? We have a friend with four daughters and one of them needs accommodated with her fear of dogs or animated animals. I have actually seen (and heard) children have worse reactions than her. It is unreasonable, but... I have to say, terror. Don't matter how cute it is. I think sometimes it's because it is animate. Our friends child is getting along if the animals ignore her, no touching... She can ignore them... but she isn't quite five. She is just a Big NO.
I would not allow some spoiled 14-year old brat to make decisions like this concerning my well-being. Her problem wasn't with the dog: she has a phobia for disabled people.
I feel like this isn't totally about the dog, but how the rest of OP's family sees her and her husband and probably because of his disability. If anyone in my family wanted a disabled loved one to give up something that helped them, I'd be horrified, and yet the parents and coddling the 14 yr who is "uncomfortable" and thinking about what she's been through instead of how the person who lives in that home who relies on support could feel. The OP needs to get them out of her house immediately and perhaps look into therapy or a support group to boost her husband's confidence and help him realize while the world is harsh on those with disabilities, it's not his fault.
John Dough: Thanks for the reply to Pinkpunk143. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . What a sanctimonious load of nonsense. The one who needs to do soul searching is you if you think this is the way to engage with strangers on the internet."
Let the brother and his family stay at dad's. Or a hotel. Or on the street for that matter. You've been kind to them and they're gonna make demands about YOUR house? No phucking way.
Here's an idea...let your brother and their family go live with your husbands father. See how uncomfortable the niece is with that arrangement. This dog is a permanent fixture in the home, they are temporary. They can either leave or let it go. Also, 34 is not too late to have kids. If Halle Berry and Naomi Watts can have healthy kids in their 40's, you can too. Don't give up....
Your husband doesn’t owe anything to anyone for being disabled just like I don’t owe anyone for being a female he’s a person too he needs to stop acting like a doormat and start acting like a person who can defend himself when someone is being unfair or rude.
These freeloaders, especially the brother, are trying to establish dominance over OP and her husband. If it wasn’t the dog, it would be something else. Once they have dominance, it becomes their house and they help themselves to what ever they want. OP and her husband accommodate them and OP serves them. The brother thinks he’s entitled because she’s a woman and the husband is disabled. Nip this in the bud today. The dog stays and if they don’t like it, they can freeload somewhere else.
I see this as the fault of their parents for raising their daughter to be a spoiled, entitled brat. This is one of those times where the teen should be building character, since there's no actual danger to her. Being "uncomfortable" around a service dog is a "you" problem, not a "service dog" problem. Frankly, service dog or not, the guests are at fault here 100%.
NTA. Keep the dog where he's at, service dog or pet alike. Your house, your rules. Your brother and SIL seem to have forgotten that vital piece of information. It's YOUR house. Not theirs. The audacity of some freeloaders just blows my mind. Thinking they can just horn in and start changing all the things. Sorry they lost their house but that does not give them any power over your domain in any shape, way, or form. If they don't like it, they can leave. Plain and simple.
You are 100% on the right. Stand your ground. Sometimes I am still shocked at how completely insensitive & self absorbed some people are. You are doing them a huge favor by letting them live with you & instead of being grateful, they give you c**p. The dog stays., & nobody better even think about hurting that dog! He is a caregiver for your husband & a member of the family. A much better one than your human family members. Kick the ingrates to the curb! Tell them to get a room at a hotel.
You accommodate 3 extra people in your home and instead of gratitude they tear your family apart.
Be very careful that your family does not poison the dog in order to get rid of it. Get rid of the relatives immediately before that happens.
NTA. However I’ve seen people calling out the niece there are several resoans that she might do this and I think if you see this you may want to look into it A. Have you seen your niece complaining if not then it’s possible the brother or mother are the ones uncomfortable with the dog especially seeing as if the niece were that uncomfortable she would probably come up and say why most children would if she actually is as uncomfortable as she is allegedly saying. B. Does your niece have a bad history with dogs we hear about rabid dog attacks all the time. C.is it possible that her parents are forcing her to avoid you and keep up a possible lie maybe she doesn’t know the value of a service dog 🐕🦺 I didn’t till I read this post on bored panda I knew they had importance but never knew they could have as much as they do she might not understand how important the dog is if she doesn’t maybe you can show or tell her why it may help decrease the intensity.
Another homeless family trying to take over a family members home....I tell ya! Stop asking if you're the AH and start and start showing them the door. Even if you were the AH you're allowed to be since it is them asking to be in YOUR space.
You definitely are NTA. Hold on to your husband and his dog and ask your brother and family to leave. Your responsibilities lie with your husband, you are not your brothers keeper. P.S. I had my son at the age of 42, he is now 22 and a Wonderful young man. It was a beautiful pregnancy and the delivery was a breeze, literally! Don't give up yet, and note that stress in your life can interfere with conception, your brother and his family need to go.
A lot of these stores are creepy up lately about family staying with another family member due to hard times and then thinking they can call the shots in THEIR home. What is with people today? Get a backbone and stop trying "to keep the peace". They are lucky they even had a place to go. Kick them out and tell them good luck
She has every right to be upset. She was kind enough to give her sister a place to stay and they want to argue and try to dictate a dog that mentally helps her disabled husband. If you are in someone else's home, you don't disrespect their home. You don't complain, and you don't start trouble. I would tell her that if the dog is such am issue, go find somewhere else to stay. The niece is a child, she is not in control of the house. She will have to learn to deal with the situation. My husband and I are both disabled veterans and I understand completely the importance of that service dog. I also understand respect and actually had to ask my sister to stay with my parents for the holidays instead of us because she brought her Great Danes and we have dogs as well. She wouldn't control her dog's, she said they could do what they want, even though it was our house. I politely asked her to leave. She was upset, but eventually got over it. Stand your ground sweetheart, you got this.
You are definitely NTA. Your family is being unfair and controlling. They should be grateful that you took them in! Whether a service dog or a pet, the dog lives in your home not them. Noone would ever be allowed to shun my beloved dog. They would have to leave not her.
I have a service dog. I also don't have any family. I would do anything to have someone like this wife to support and defend me and my dog. These kinds of people are priceless beyond compare.
NTA. Your house, your family, your rules. Tell them to move in with the father and leave you and your husband in peace. Also my last child was born when I was 42 and my wife was 39. I know you said there are infertility problems but it's not too late for you to have kids. Miracles happen all the time.
Sorry but like what? Please explain how and what about this dog makes the niece uncomfortable? The size, breed, smell ? She needs educating. As for you being too old to have a baby, my first was at the tender age of 36 and number 2 was at 39. So please don't give up xxx
Very selfish on your families part to even ask you to get rid of your service dog. The dogs a necessity who helps your husband live a more normal life and a friend who can even help ease anxiety and emotional issues. Your very loving husband deserves better than that. I hope you protect him after all the times he gave everyone else what they wanted.
Tell them they have 12 hours to be gone from the house, no if's or but's. Who the fornicate do they think they are telling YOU and your husband what you can and can not have in the house. If you don't it will be, "oh we want YOUR bedroom as it is bigger" and then they will slowly take over.
Your dog is not only s service dog...he is more than a pet, he is a family member and a life saver. If your niece and her parents do not understand this, then they should leave. They should appreciate and feel grateful that you accommodated them in your home as nonpaying guests. They should drop this feeling of entitlement just bec they are relatives. They are not entitled to anything.
Your amazing service dog is a life saver and a family member as well. If your niece and her parents who are just actually nonpaying guests in your house do not understand this, then, they should leave. They should actually appreciate you accommodating them in your home. They should be grateful and not feel entitled jusy bec they are relatives.
NTA.The niece needs to be taught that respect and appreciation go a long way. Compassion for those with unique challenges, is how society moves forward, They are raising an entitled child, that few will have patience for. Also help your husband find his voice by looking into counseling, group counseling or a support group. So he can stand up to his dad. He did not choose his disability but does not have to become it either. You are both in your 30s and still very young. There's so many different ways to expand your family including short term foster care etc. Unless your husband cannot be around people or he is physically disabled, help him find meaning in his daily routine. If he Can be around people, maybe volunteer to go and read once a week at a nearby elementary school or library etc. Or take online classes from the local community College. He sounds like a sweet man with a lot of compassion and a big heart. You are a great cheerleader for him.
The fact that OP's nasty brother and his even worse family have the gall to demand that a Service Dog be removed from the home is INFURIATING! How DARE THEY demand that they modify OP's family structure! I would NEVER allow that nasty family in my home after their PRIOR ATTACK ON MY SPOUSE! I suggest OP do the same if those bastards keep it up. AH's time in OP'S home is up.
I mean.....wtf?!?! The dog isn't even bothering her???? What is with some people. If that was my child, and my sister was nice enough to let my family move in, i wouldn't have even asked her to move the dog, id tell my child to get over it and stop acting like a brat.
I wouldn't even discuss it anymore. Just saw "nah bro" every time they ask.
This is a no brainerfor this of us who have brains. NTA! What's most disturbing and shockingabout this scenario is the complete lack of awareness of both so called "adults" , the brother and his wife who clearly lack respect for others and feel a sense of entitlement and apparently that they are owed something, while also teaching bad values to their daughter. The sister in this scenario is doing her brother and his ignorant and very ungrateful wife the favor of allowing them and their daughter to stay in their home. Instead of being grateful and realizing they are guest in the sister's and her husband's home, they make demands and insult her husband. If it were me, I would politely but directly explain that their choices are to accept that both the husband and the dog live there and are not leaving and it's not up for discussion. And if this is not a workable arrangement for them, and since it's not their home, they should immediately make arrangements to stay elsewhere. The end.
OP. Your brother and SIL and your petty niece have officially worn out their welcome. You need to put your foot down hard. This is YOUR HOUSE YOUR RULES. give them one week and THATS It. Let th know under no uncertain terms this dog is must for your husband in his OWN home and you will no longer. TOLERATE their or your nieces attitude. WHAT SELFISH PEOPLE they are. GOOD luck to you.
They need to leave. Your house, your husband, your dog-service or otherwise. Period. I hope you update this and let us know what happens.
I've seen enough of these sorts of posts with ungrateful people with absurd demands that I think I'd have a difficult time allowing anyone to stay in my home for any amount of time for any reason.
You need to remind your guests that homelessness is more uncomfortable. The dog was there (His Home) when they lugged their stuff in the house. Talk about cheeky! Good for you stepping up and stopping the madness.
NTA!!! I have helped raise service dogs for a few different disabilities. They are doing a job! They are working! Have your neice get a job! That way she's away from the house and learning how work around her "uncomfortability" around dogs. Better yet! Have her work at a dog daycare! There are some out there looking for volunteers. I volunteered at an animal hospital (cleaning supplies, doing potty breaks, taking inventory, stacking food bags, working with mail, laundry) when I was 14! Rather than complaining about a dog doing a job, she can get a job of her own!
Lifelong cripple here. I don't have a dog but the niece is an entitled c**t incapable of being empathetic to others. Whether or not the dog helps at home isn't the point, he paid for it and it's his property and equipment
(OP-LIKE)"I'm sorry, your breathing offends me and your daughters clothing makes me uncomfortable, could you relocate these so my stress level comes down." (Ignorant offender). "Why should I? (OP) "I pay the bills here, when you pay them you may file a grievance with the appropriate department.; that being said I will kindly extend to you a courtesy of 3 business days to relocate or find your belongings on the lawn" Maybe that's just me...IF, I PAY the bills or my spouse does and you aren't covering the totality, you may consider a minor conversation of kind but the homeowner owes you nothing! Furthermore the correct thing to do would be to honestly humble themselves and apologize to YOU AND YOUR SPOUSE.
At 14, the niece should have learned, sand be continuing to learn how to deal with uncomfortable situations, and more importantly, that she can't salaries have things her way -especially when she's a guest at someone else's house. And it's amazingly cheeky of her and her parents to expect her husband to give up his service dog for the duration of their stay. Let us hope, for the sake of OP and Mr. OP, that their stay is of short duration. Service dogs are not pets. They are important assistants in the daily care and activities of their owners. I have a friend whose life was saved by her service dog. They are amazing canine heroes. OP and Mr OP should ask their guests to put their big on kid pants and deal with this temporary living situation, or remove themselves permanently from the home to accommodations where their entitled princess won't have to whine and pout because she can't have things her way.
I don't care if the hubs had a service skunk & they were Jesus, Mary, & the Saints..OP was wise to stand her ground. These people are abjectly pathological ( I really can't find an adjective to cover this one.) In her house...w/ her husband... who's disabled...as a favour to them...They'd be on the street, down the road, & around the corner if I were OP. Good God!
I have/train service dogs. My specialty is handlers with ptsd/sexual trauma/social anxiety and sprinkling of others. if someone told me to get rid of my dog being guests in my house it'd be time to let them find a hotel. You are right for being furious, however, if your husband wants to go elsewhere to preserve the peace you should respect that. You are fanning the flame of a conflict that is likely causing him way more trauma than he deserves. aThank you for standing up for him, but pride shouldn't make you hurt him to drive a point home to someone else.
And the trauma he'd experience in his abusive father's home? The man considers him a waste of space and isn't shy about telling him so!
Load More Replies... I need to add something here. I'm sorry that it took me a second read to get this. Miss Lady, you are married to one hell of a MAN!!!!!!! I wish I could meet you both. You have a good guy there. Please don't let him go. My apologies for not getting this on my first read-through. I was focused on the dog. I am now as you are focused on your husband. Please accept my apologies! Love to you all. Yes, all of ya!
I'm not even dog person I think the niece and brother's family are outta line. You are staying their home for free. Like they're family. But not everyone lucky enough to have family like that. They should be appreciative instead laying down ground rules. Secondly ,what is the dog doing that's making the niece so uncomfortable? Is the dog sniffing her crotch, I've always had that issue especially can be ackward for a preteen, like it can be pretty easily trained not to do that. Service dogs are already well trained to be pleasant around people to begin with.
Tell your brother to cowboy the blank up and tell his daughter to stop being sich a brat. I can't believe they even asked you that. That is so incredibly rude. Makes me mad.
Tell your brother to cowboy the blank up and tell his daughter to stop being such a brat. I can't believe they even asked you that. That is incredibly rude. Makes me mad.
Ntah. You allowed them to live in yout home. If they don't like the dog. Tell them to find a motel,or deal with having the dog around. Your handicapped husband is your priority here. NOT the whining bee- otches. If they don't like it there kick them out .
NTA at all! Sad that OP had to ask this. The only way they could be the a*****e is if neice was highly allergic and the family had absolutely nowhere to go, then MAYBE I'd consider getting rid of the dog but it's still iffy, but anyways that's obviously not the case. I feel bad for OPs husband
I've seen people be over dramatic and start screaming because they SEE a cat or dog, annoying but they have the right to do so. But I can only imagine the convo with someone like that about how they're going to have to get over themselves if they want to live with me and how it's unreasonable to ask someone to kick their pet out for any period of time. SMFH. Wow.
Can't believe it. No wonder the niece is so entitled if the parents have brought her up that way. It's OP's and her husband's house, their rules. The cheek...! Whatever next, "could you please go and live elsewhere as your disability makes me feel uncomfortable..?"
WTF!!@ You take these people into your home. YOUR HOME! And they tell you how it's going to be? Oh hell no. They and all there c**p would be on the curb with the door slammed in their faces. How dare they. I don't care if it's a service e dog or not. ITS YOUR HOME. These people have absolutely no respect for you or your husband. Throw them out. Now.
My opinion on this is simply: they need motivation to get themselves out of their own mess. It appears this dog will give them some. It is not your duty to bend over backwards and cave to your guests whims. A service dog is a highly trained assistant that they have no need to worry about. If they continue, buy some extra dog food, set a place for your dog, feed him semi human food and them dog food. See if that helps them get the message of who's the boss of your own home (semi-joking)
I wonder if there's something happening to the niece and she's expressing it as ill will towards the dog? Unless she just generally doesn't like dogs, I'd be a bit concerned. Definitely wouldn't give up my dog, but I would check in with the niece
I'm wondering if the girl (and maybe even the brother) is in fact uncomfortable with her uncle and is diverting this aversion to the dog - maybe even unknowingly. If the brother's family wants to stay they need some serious counseling. His behavior is very inappropriate!
I think her brother and family should find a family shelter to stay in. See how many changes they make for the thoughtless family.
--is essentially more than a pet he is a family member and a necessity to her uncle who needs him they both go hand in hand that shouldn't be hard for a teenager to comprehend they learn harder things in school. Also I can't believe the gall and nerve of the sister in law starting a yelling match in the woman's very own house she should have even more consideration and sense why the dog stays and then to have the nerve to ask this is how you show how much you care about your nieces feelings I'd tell her to get her head checked and remind her that if she cared so little for her nieces safety and comfort she wouldn't be under her roof at that very moment none of them would and that if that isn't enough to the door is right there!!!! You can just tell the sister in law the ladies brother and their teenager daughter are completely self absorbedin their feelings to the point they are ungreatful and want to make the host feel like the criminal and are disregarding everything she has done
I'm sorry but this ladies brother and his family is way out of line I cannot! Like this is ridiculous and the fact that her husband is such passive sweet heart that he is willing to go stay with his father just to keep the peace I could never allow that not the dog as a pet or for service or the spouse I'd make it clear to them that they maybe family but their under you and your husbands roof you are doing them a favor and as far as the niece she is a teenager going through motions of being one and a brat being that she is so dead set on getting he way that she has opted to ignore her aunt completely being under her roof regardless of what she is going through she needs a reality check cause obviously no one else cared enough to open their doors but the aunt did and she like other ppl commented on here would be a lot less comfortable on the streets or in a shelter! Without the niece even taking a second to talk to her aunt about what is really wrong or try understand the animal is-
Goodness! They lost their home and moved in with you?! They better respect your service dog AND your pet tarantula!
NTA! Give away your relatives fr. Such ungrateful a**holes. They should be bowing down and praising this couple for taking them in. Throw that family out with the trash.
Your house, if they don't like how it is they need to shut up and leave. The nerve and entitled behavior is over the top. The niece doesn't like the dog then she should stay away from it. Catering to her bratty behavior is just going to encourage worse from her.
Service dog or my fried-chicken-eating howler... THE DOG STAYS. Give the guests a ride to a nice hotel. Might want to warn the parents of your neice. She is exhibiting inappropriate behavior and seems to have a bit too much of a narcissism problem to be 14 years old. At 4, hope for best. At 14, wow. Is a mutt who keeps an old woman company on the couch a service dog? Hmmmm. As long as I'm not out in the world, my children and grandchildren say THAT is a service dog! 🐶🥰
If the dog dies or disappears, don't be surprised. It could also happen after they have to move out. When did their 'few weeks' begin? At the very least, the dissatisfied niece needs to find someplace else to live now . Her request and expectation to eliminate the dog is disruptive and shameful when she is a guest in your home.
Quite straightforward - stay in the house and respect the inhabitants including any pets or service animals and be grateful you've a roof over your head. Alternatively if I hear another word or see anything dodgy then you've 24hrs to leave. Touch the dog and that timeline becomes how quickly you can run.
Well now, give them 12 hours to find another kind family to take them in, or live in a motel room. The 14 year old is spoiled and selfish. God forbid they be thankful for your kindness. Tell the family that is being critical to provide for them. let them know that unless their attitude changes towards your husband's situation you're more than happy to call local authorities to assist them to vacate your premises. Sorry I have no patience for their narrow mindedness.
In my opinion BiL and family can gtfo since they are guests and they have overstayed their welcome
Sounds like your family are MAGA morons. Tell the fascists no and to move to another country if they want dictatorship
Screw the entitled nice. This is a control issue. Tell her to eff off
Hey. It's your home. Not theirs. Seems like they're not being supportive at all. Also sounds like they may be wanting to make this temporary stay an extended stay. I'd dump them at the nearest shelter.
Why on earth would you ask someone in their own home to get rid of or relocate a service dog?? Or even a pet in general? So what if husband is home, I guarantee he still needs that dog. Maybe it's a seizure dog? My friend had one that would alert her when it sensed a seizure coming on so she could lay on the ground to prepare. If he were wheelchair bound would they ask him to not use his wheelchair because it makes them uncomfortable?? They are guests in the home, I would've just asked them to leave if they don't like it. I don't care if they don't have their own home to go to at that point
They Knew this service dog was there before they moved in! The neice should have told her parents "before" they moved in that she can't be around it! If they knew before hand, and thought they could just walk over you, and have their way! Kick them to the curb! ASAP! If you don't, they will take it as a power play, and start trying to take over your home!! This is not just a service dog, it is a family member, and a friend. I'd help them find a place, or out them in a hotel. Isn't there other family they can go to on SIL side?
What amazes me the most about these is the dog was there when they moved in. They knew it was there and still asked to stay. Not like they added a nippy puppy after they moved in and the niece has a phobia (even that I'd question removing the dog, but it's the only situation I can think of where this might even warrent consideration)
NTA. If you don't want to deal with my dogs don't come to my house. You have to be mindful of your dogs and how others feel about them everywhere else including the dog park, but not at home, their home. If someone wants to be stay in the guest room they need to know the dog is part of the deal. If they don't like it they can call another relative to room with, and there shouldn't be hard feelings. I'd be like ok, you're a guest in my house and I'd really appreciate it if you would act like it. You don't get to make requests that change the way I live in my own house. You're welcome to stay and enjoy the space, but you don't get to be part of household decisions and you don't get to suggest changes. You're a guest. I love you and you're welcome but if you're truly uncomfortable you can leave. I don't mean to be mean but I'm absolutely not compromising on this.
Should have removed the neice out the house, I mean it's yours much as your husband's house and your husband health is top priority so the dog is needed around him 24/7. Just like if your neice had broken her leg and she would need crutches to get around. Your hubby needs his dog.
One thing to consider is that the niece may be traumatized by losing her home, and her way of dealing with the loss is by trying to control her new environment. If so, the adults fighting would just make it worse. Perhaps the solution is some sort of therapy for the daughter.
So the niece is uncomfortable. How do you think the husband feels? What about his comfort? They lost their home so they want to take the husband's?
Unlikely to be a popular opinion, but that's ok. This is just another example of a man failing his family and a family failing their kid. This teenager thinks her opinion matters and her part are caving to her demands!!! Who is in charge? If there was any discipline in the Brothers house this would have been a non issue from the start.
Wowza, what a bunch of entitled asses! I would pack their stuff and kick them out. They can find somewhere else to stay where they can be "comfortable". Will be interesting to see how they deal with the their incredibly spoiled and manipulating 14 yr old as she gets older and increasingly entitled. Good luck with that. Don't let them or anyone bully you, stand your ground and bid them adieu.
If the kid is afraid of dogs, just have her admit it and then they can move forward with it. A service dog is a great way of dealing with a fear of dogs as they are calm and obey commands and can help with aversion therapy. Otherwise, if the dog is trained correctly then it shouldn't be jumping on people then I don't see why else she would be uncomfortable.
How incredibly thoughtless, entitled, and astoundingly rude of those people. Your family!! I'd kick them out immediately, and it would be a long time before I saw them again. Waiting for an apology........
The niece and parents have to leave. Go pat for a Motel 6. They should be grateful they are not homeless. You are NTA. I sure would be, because I would have asked them to leave the first time that request was uttered. And they are arguing, disturbing the peace of your home. They gotta go.
The dog could be removed after the niece completes dog training and is capable of preforming the duties. Then agrees and demonstrates proficiency.
I had some strong feelings about this. So much so I felt it necessary to go to the OP to comment directly to the post. Although, I know my comment will never be read, as it is buried under 10k+ comments lol. Anyway, I'll say the same here too. Anybody who would, without a legitimate reason, ask a person to move out a family member is just a messed up person. It's wrong! Especially when asking for one to be removed forces another family member to go with them. Hubby and doggo are a package deal. The niece, SIL, and bro have no right to make a demand like that. Maybe it would be more understandable if doggo induced allergies or was aggressive but since that is not the case, those mooches can either go get a hotel or shut up and be grateful that family is willing to put them up cost free until they get on their feet.
This dog is a surface animal, which is like medical equipment. You cannot say “hack, please quit using oxygen so I can smoke.“ The niece is entitled and needs to calm down. Maybe she could serve meals in a homeless shelter for a while to find out what she’s being saved from. Talk about uncomfortable. Also, even if it were a pet, unless it bit for no reason, There was no way that I would rehome it for my niece, and most certainly would not rehome my husband.
Is it really the dog the niece is "uncomfortable" with? Or is it that she's been listening to other people saying the words you husband's father has said out loud, just trying to not sound like the absolute a$$'s they are?
What's with the ppl on AITA that move to someone's house and make demands? Is that a trend now?
The audacity of some people absolutely blows my mind!!!! Can you imagine?! Begging for a place to live and then bitching about it ?? Unbelievable!
If someone took my family and I in out of the goodness of their hearts, I would not be complaining. These ungrateful idiots even said it’s temporary. Yes, it’s temporary for THEM, not the OP and her husband, whose house it is the relatives are temporarily staying in. If you are a guest staying somewhere for FREE, you do not get to dictate the terms of your stay. Their house, their rules. Your house, your rules. Brother and family need to STFU, and look for a home of their own, then move out—-QUICK.
Am I the a*****e? If you can't even say the name of the forum maybe stop posting their content.
You don't have to click on these articles you know.
Load More Replies... If anything shall happen to her because of the dog you will have to live with that for the rest of your life. Dogs sense more than humans. Find out if she fears for her safety. I wouldn't imagine she would say anything if it wasn't for fear. This type of dog in the photo looks like a boxer...dangerous breed. One more thing...have you had him since he was a puppy? If not then you really don't know him...PS... People are cruel in their comments. If you care for him and her just separate them while she's around. There is most likely enough space in your home to accommodate your needs and your extended family's needs.
1. The family could get a hotel 2. The uncle's service dog comes before the niece's comfort 3. I don't that's the actual dog.
Load More Replies... What sort of info would make this ok? If the dog was just a pet it STILL wouldn't make the behavior from the guests ok. I'll never understand you people who go out of your way to defend the indefensible.
Load More Replies... Asking the aunt to "relocate the dog" is stupid too.
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