For all the talk about gender equality, the truth is that being a woman is very different in reality, full of everyday struggles that some people might not be aware of until they’re pointed out. That’s what Twitter user Gayatri wanted to show the world with her viral thread where she asked women to tell her they’re women “without telling me you’re a woman.”

Gayatri, from Mumbai in India, caught people’s attention with her to-the-point and no-nonsense thread. She opened up by saying that she’s always on the lookout for “escape routes” whenever she’s walking in a dark alley. Other women pitched in with their experiences and Gayatri added a few more of her own. Gayatri told Bored Panda that she routinely talks about women's life and workplace experiences on Twitter. "I started this thread as a way for women to share their experiences and the prejudices they face in everyday life. The answers showed that women all over the country and world even had the same experiences. We fought the same battles."

Scroll down a read through the responses to Gayatri's thread and our interview with her, dear Pandas. What did you think of the thread? How would you answer her question? What do you think can be done to change the situation? Let us know in the comments. Gayatri’s fears aren’t unfounded. The situation with women’s rights in India is shocking, writes The Guardian, and both women and girls are frequently victims of violence.

#1

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

yadudewhatever Report

Tabitha L
Community Member
2 months ago

I bought a fake engagement ring in college for this purpose.

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#2

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

GayatriiM Report

Rocio Palacios
Community Member
2 months ago

This Is true, and infuriating.

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#3

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

TapiocaChip Report

Vorknkx
Community Member
2 months ago

Marriage is treated like some kind of train that you have to catch before it's too late. So frustrating.

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According to Gayatri, one of the things that the responses to her thread showed is that rights and reality are two very different things. "Instead of asking women what needs to change about women's rights, I think what needs to change is the perception of men. Women are still looked at as inferior beings who need to be told what to do and how to live every single day," she said.

"Men need to actively listen to women, overcome their biases and age-old mental conditioning, and treat women as equals. These discourses are being labeled feminism and the women who talk about this, feminists. But if you think about it, all women want is to left alone and not be told by men how to lead their lives."

#4

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

Phoebe_Greggor Report

Elizabeth Molloy
Community Member
2 months ago

51. I didn't.

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#5

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

bhumikagem Report

Red Hair Blue Soul
Community Member
2 months ago

And last one to sit down and relax, if ever!

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#6

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

Shayoneespeaks Report

Rocio Palacios
Community Member
2 months ago

Same. Not our responsability!

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However, there are problems in the West, as well. Writer and founder of ‘Voice of Salam,’ Elizabeth Arif-Fear told Bored Panda that women face sexist attitudes, harassment, and barriers to entry because of their gender both in the workplace and outside of it.

Her solutions to these issues is to continue to “dismantle gender-based stereotypes about gender roles,” push for “full parity in dividing unpaid work at home with their partners,” and report incidents of harassment and “illegal questioning of their marital status in job interviews.”

#7

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

dillidikudii Report

Natalia
Community Member
2 months ago

Oh come on! That's so frustrating!

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#8

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

Aparna Report

Red Hair Blue Soul
Community Member
2 months ago (edited)

And I do more work than the men in my office

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#9

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

DimpledJalebi Report

Soap
Community Member
2 months ago

I don't want children. That's my answer, and it won't change. Stop making my life yours.

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According to Arif-Fear, these kinds of actions will help in continuing the work toward “smashing the glass ceiling” that women face.

“Ladies, you can do it! Please believe in yourself!” she said. “Likewise, partners need to do their share at home, colleagues should check their attitudes (e.g. sexist comments), not mansplain in meetings, and managers and employers should ensure that they are creating fair equal opportunities and spaces at the table. Consideration for those with childcare responsibilities is also important.”

#10

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

VeduVada Report

Tabitha L
Community Member
2 months ago

My family still thinks I laugh too loudly.

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#11

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

soundarya_b Report

Natalia
Community Member
2 months ago

...and don't forget to make and serve coffee!

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#12

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

howbza Report

Rocio Palacios
Community Member
2 months ago

Take self defense classes. It Is important to make you feel more secure and for reducing anxiety.

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#13

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

ScrollsNInk Report

Rocio Palacios
Community Member
2 months ago

I have Heard this one several times. I still dont get it and my reaction Is "ignore and keep lifting"

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#14

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

vanish_forever Report

Rocio Palacios
Community Member
2 months ago (edited)

This Is true, most of the times women are in charge of child cre. When i travel kids stay with my partner, but he Is "assisted" by muy mother un law, the Nanny, and my female friends.

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#15

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

ArghWii Report

Soap
Community Member
2 months ago

I just stay quiet and suddenly my sad is anger. I hate it.

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#16

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

KaurHarkirtan Report

Rocio Palacios
Community Member
2 months ago

I dont, and Im a woman too. Dont force stereotypes.

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#17

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

startafresh4 Report

Red Hair Blue Soul
Community Member
2 months ago

If she would have raised him correctly, he should be able to take care of himself!

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#18

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

BansariKamdar Report

K.
Community Member
2 months ago

I was a 19 year old spinster double majoring in STEM fields, and was told I’m attractive and didn’t have to do that. Another reason for me to do so. Wish me luck for more degrees in my future. Now I’m a proud and voluntary thornback.

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#19

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

badassbrownmom Report

Iggy
Community Member
2 months ago

I had a friend loudly hush me when a group of us were discussing a particular topic. It was about the field I worked in! I tore strips off him.

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#20

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

rohini_mohan Report

Emily
Community Member
2 months ago

Ooooh I feel this. Living with my MIL while I finished nursing school I reduced my hours to part time work and spent my "free time" doing things I enjoy to spare my sanity. She once very "kindly" told me that when she was married she always made sure there was food on the table for her husband when he got home from work. Now I'm a nurse caring for COVID patients and my husband is not working... he isn't cooking for me and I'd never expect him too. I don't believe she had the same conversation with her son. Such an antiquated expectation!

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#21

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

bhumikatyagi5 Report

ADHORTATOR
Community Member
2 months ago

that's sad

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#22

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

womensweb Report

Rocio Palacios
Community Member
2 months ago

Agreed. Same thing here. "She has a PhD, but is just un Cats". Fxxk them, useless, frustrated pricks.

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#23

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

lizsesh Report

Arctic Fox Lover
Community Member
2 months ago

No. Just no.

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#24

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

waywardandwise Report

Red Hair Blue Soul
Community Member
2 months ago

I've stopped doing this. It's amazingly freeing watching men'sreactionsthe first few times they realized that I wasn't moving.

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#25

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

MalaSivaprasad Report

deanna woods
Community Member
2 months ago

I do the pretend to be on the phone thing because there are some creepy dudes in my apartment complex.

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#26

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

geekafterglow Report

Rocio Palacios
Community Member
2 months ago

Good for you to recognize it. Now STOP. Count all your achievements un order. Say them out loud. You will feel proud.

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#27

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

lavanyad Report

HappyPig1723
Community Member
2 months ago

Man, I'm only 12 but even I know this stuff. (I'm a girl btw) The world is a scary place.

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#28

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

nonstopbakbak Report

Natalia
Community Member
2 months ago

You are doing your best every single day! 🤜🤛

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#29

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

gunalan_monika Report

Rocio Palacios
Community Member
2 months ago

You are teaching him something really important by being strong and a working mom. Keep up.

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#30

Reality-Of-Being-A-Women

Sai_ki_bitiya Report

Natalia
Community Member
2 months ago

Once I had a conversation with a highly educated man. He said "whenever you see s**t happening on a road you know for sure that the driver is a woman!" I was like what?!?! 😤

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