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We’re all craving something sweet and soothing during the quarantine. So why not try out that banana bread recipe that's been hanging on your fridge for over two years now? I mean, the ten boxes of eggs, aka your coronapocalypse hoard, ain't gonna bake themselves.

The pans are flying in no time and the solo baking show is on. The timer goes off and there you have it—a doughy monstrosity and impressive baking fail. Bored Panda has collected the most unsuccessful attempts right down below that will hopefully spark your inner chef, because whatever you make… it can’t be that bad. Been there, baked that? Share your quarantine bake-off stories in the comments! 

#3

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

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Bill
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"Its a its aaah rocket ship.yeah a rocketship. " "Death to Smoochie" a great adult humor Robin Williams movie

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Jackie Day
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have not laughed that hard in a really long time. I'm an RN, needed the laugh! They don't look ANYTHING like lighthouses..

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Cyndie Varin
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It reminds me of what I'm missing so much during quarantine. Bakeries, of course.

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EA
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Who made a lighthouse cookie cutter and thought that was a great idea?! No way it could go wrong and look anything like a very similar shape...

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Carla Partington
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

At least there is a good explanation, because I never would have thought of lighthouse cookies!!!

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Danimal
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

to be fair, even if they did turn out well, without detailed decoration, they would still look like penis's.

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Johanne Larochelle
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So many puns, so little that are respectable.... haha different party I guess...

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Shannon McHenry
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Love it!! I once used a penis cake mold to make a lighthouse cake. Only one person noticed.

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kriss kobashi
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She have to add 2 eyes each of it, so she could say "I tried to make elephant heads, but it seems didn't work"

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Ildiko Okido
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why on earth would you want to bake lighthouse shaped cookies anyway?

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Cindy Snow
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well hey people make penis cookies for bachelorette parties...

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Kate Johnson
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is an old picture, and it's missing the other part of the post which actually showed the lighthouse cookie-cutters.

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Thomas Es Thomas
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How they do it? Buy six or eight identical metal cookie cutters and spray them with non-stick cooking spray, then bake the biscuits in the shapes, like you do cupcakes.

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Glenna Elliott
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Add some icing, and they will be good. They look more like a cactus.

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Endishere
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

no body has any guts to say that they were like penises? :-D

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Sara Mccracken
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There is a town in Portugal that makes these on purpose... they are gifts a man can present to his sweetheart like a Valentine card.

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Claudia Wilch
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't think they look like lighthouses . . . I could give you another guess . .

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Aiden Lucas
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

no one will say what they look like so I will. they look like a bunch of dingle-dongers.

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David Kichi
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Another first time victim of whoever it was that designed this cookie cutter, is it safe to say only master bakers can safely use it without it's intended consequence? Lol

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Kaytal Johnson
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't want to be rude and say what these look like.... but good job they just need some white icing.

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Magpie
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I feel like I can smell them. Are they peanut butter?

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Janis Wise
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I doubt those rockets will fly, what say you? Lighthouses! Sure, you go with that honey.

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Sharon-Shay Walsh
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think it looks like a pointing finger. Yeah that's what it looks like.

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Pamela E Brueckner
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ha ha ha...no words but I really have to use my imagination to see lighthouse ha ha ha

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Rã. R. Field
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Looks like the emoji nose... sheesh they are scary in any shade👃🏻& sending a kiss on the nose feels rather wrong too:)

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pony33
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think you have something on your mind. Are you presently single???

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lilian covany
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I´m pretty sure we all know what they really look like... Lmao

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melbfk
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not like any light house I've ever seen. It's ok, you're from Florida!

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Chris DiFonso
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Are you happy to see me, or is that a lighthouse cookie in your hand?

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Chris DiFonso
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I knew pretty much everything in Florida was different, I shouldn't be surprised that the shape of lighthouses is also different

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Garth Robinson
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think the mix needed to be a bit firmer before turning out and rolling.... just sayin'.

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Pamela Grove
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There are "interesting". I can SEE why everyone laughed. I hope you don't have an extremely conservative family. This is a cake of spreading. There are several things which cause this but next time, if you followed instructions EXACTLY, place sheet of unbaked cookies in freezer 5 minutes or refrigerator 15 minutes before placing in oven. Chilled cookie dough does not spread nearly as much.

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Calliope Klitou
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sorry don't want to sound mean but they look like d***s to me lol

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Jessica Cifelli
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you ice them right they can be Sorting Hats...some of them. The rest... bachelorette party

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PanditoBandito
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, what did you think they would look like? I mean who actually sees a lighthouse when you look at the cutter?

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Maureen Rouse
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sorry... can't see a lighthouse. Looks more like a bit of male anatomy!

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Lewis Brydges
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I mean, decorate it right and it can still light up someone's night...

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Joyce Deering
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Lighthouses huh? Sorry. I just couldn't visualize lighthouses. ...nevermind. :p

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Abby Taylor
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Here the real scoop. These cookies were not made by this person. My friend made these cookies and posted this picture on Facebook on March 26, 2020. He made them in MICHIGAN because Michigan has, you know, over 200 lighthouses, while Florida has...30. I looked at this persons twitter and I realized she is a liberal with level 11 TDS. Then I realized that it’s probably her usual MO to steal and lie about things she didn’t do.

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TJ RC
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Settle for simple but cute shapes otherwise people are gonna get wrong ideas about you. Dough will never turn out the way we want them to.

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Michael Nebab
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They turned out maybe tangentially related to how many people feel about florida.

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Brent Kaufman
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hey all you, Stop laughing. They do get wrinkly like that when you get up in years, like you do. But still just as good, or better, to eat.

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Reem Hamze
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It looks nice to serve to people whose names start with the letter T, because your cookie looks like the letter T

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Dorothy Parker
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Just looking at the cookie cutter should have hinted at the result.

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Vivienne Rubin
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There was a great seafood restaurant near West Palm years ago, close to a lighthouse. (Arthur's Landing??) They had an ice-cream dessert that was covered in a red candy shell. It was served straight up on the plate.

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Kim Bush
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I used to be a baker and had a few x-rated cake requests.... These would have been a great addition to the order

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Sue_Doe
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Straight from Cape Canaveral....to Houston, we have another problem.

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Nora H.
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think the author of this recipe had a secret evil agenda. This is no unlucky coincidence...

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Nora H.
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Was about to add that some frosting might save it.. but nahhh. It won't.

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A
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have an Eiffel Tower cookie cutter that produces the same results. Every. Time.

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Sue Prewitt
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Just a helpful hint, if you want one. Put them in the fridge for 1/2 between cutting them and baking them.. Still look tasty though.

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tuzdayschild
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There is a deleted comment. I probably see what that person saw.

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Dani Allen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This photo is actually STOLEN from my cousin. The cookie cutter is of St Abbs in the North of England. Gotta steal photos now just to make a funny article eh? #Thieves

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Hermione Granger
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Its not stolen if they tell you where they got it from. The account name is right there.

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Gipsy Kings fan
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

There is a cookie cutter made intentionally for cookies to turn out this way -- the "Male Anatomy Cookie Cutter," available on Amazon: ;-) https://www.amazon.com/Anatomy-Penis-Cookie-Cutter-4-625/dp/B07P2SQN3D

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You’re not the only one considering making banana bread. The global pandemic has turned many into avid home bakers. In fact, there are so many of them that suppliers have been forced to increase production.

Bloomberg reports that baking staples have become a sort-of luxury. Baking yeast sales were up 457% over last year for the week ending March 28. Flour was up 155%, butter up 73%, baking powder up 178%, and eggs up 48%.

Robert Harper, the president at Hopkinsville Milling Co., said the company is packing twice as much flour as usual. Harper commented: “It started to look like Thanksgiving and Christmas all rolled into one. People have time on their hands and are trying to save some money.”

#4

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

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Rabbit Carrot
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Cut them up post bake when they’re still a little soft. Or if they’re a little hard crumble them up into large chunks and sprinkle on ice cream. Nom.

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#5

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

My make-shift attempt at making a bunny failed me, but I think I baked a fat cat instead? 

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Mark
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Thinks first picture was the after, looks at second picture, what the hell!!!!

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#6

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

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Bored Panda contacted Beth Coombes, a professional pastry chef and the owner of bespoke bakery Pili Pala Cakehouse, who told us about everything you need to know to bake in quarantine like a pro.

Beth suggests always reading your recipe in full before just going for it. “Baking is such a science and things must be done in the correct order to achieve the end result you want,” she explained. Plus, always weigh your ingredients before starting so you can concentrate on the method while making it.

#7

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

So...this looked to be baking perfectly and happily in the oven...this was the surprise on the other side

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#8

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

“Ummm....are the cinnamon buns supposed to try and escape from the pan?

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The pastry chef named a couple of beginner’s mistakes that are best to avoid. One of the most common ones is setting the oven to the right temperature. “Cakes cook on so many different temperatures to get different results, so don’t think 'ah, this temp will do,' as it might not work, and you’ll learn that the hard way.”

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Another common mistake that anyone who is new to baking could make is simply not knowing the technique. “For example, 'beating' or 'folding' techniques. If you’re not sure what a word means, give it a little google first and you’ll be good to go.”

If you can decide on a recipe to try out when in quarantine, Beth has shared her super-easy salted caramel brownies recipe with all the Pandas out there. The ingredients you’ll need are: 170g dark chocolate, 170g unsalted butter, 3 eggs, 225g caster sugar, 50g cocoa, 50g plain flour, ½ tsp sea salt, 100g salted caramel.

“Preheat your oven to 150℃ and line a 11”/8” tin. First, melt the chocolate and butter together and leave to cool for a couple of minutes. Then, whisk your eggs and sugar together until combined before adding your chocolatey butter mixture. Continue to gently whisk until it all comes together, then add your cocoa powder, flour, and salt. Fold this together, to make sure it’s all smooth and combined—it will be super-thick and shiny.”

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“Lastly, add half of your salted caramel to the brownie, fold, and combine. Pour this in the tin, then drizzle and swirl the other half through the brownie. Give it a couple of taps on the table to level it out and bake it in the oven for 20-25 minutes.” 

“Once ready, it should still be a little wobbly in the center, but crusted and set around the edges. You must leave this to cool for a few hours before cutting into squares and indulging—trust me, it will totally be worth it!” Bon appetit!

#13

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

Baking fail. My macarons exploded and didn’t grow feet.
I’m pretty sure it had to do with my almond flour. I made my own and I think it was too moist. I haven’t been able to find ready made almond flour but almonds are readily available. I’m gonna try again

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#14

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

In my attempt at making pizza, i discovered my yeast had expired in 2010. And the supermarkets had ran out of yeast. Then I read about making yeast from dried fruit. I used dried longan and here is an interesting outcome. The dough was stretchy and after baking, I ended up with a very pleasant tasting crispy and slightly chewy sweetish flatbread. It went really well with crunchy peanut butter

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Emperor Kitten
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Or make a sourdough starter. You won't get your pizza for a week, but it'll be awesome.

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#16

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

Sadly my challahday easter bunny didn't quite work out. Seems to have come down with some hip dysplasia, ear disconnection, and a touch of elephantiasis in the oven... I think the main culprits here were uneven working of the various strands, slight underproofing, and perhaps some rusty baking skills. Next time..

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#19

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

A bit too much of baking soda

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#20

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

Sweet f’n dreams people!!

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Harleen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's how everyone looks after years of smoking carrots. It catches up with you.

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#21

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

I think I made the peanut butter cookies a bit too big.

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#22

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

He’s baaaaaa-ck! 3. Oh no!! 4. Sleepy sheepy

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#24

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

I tried to make pretzels and they went MUTANT 

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#26

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

i am normally a good baker. i found a recipe for egg custard pie. i told my husband 2 go 2 the store to get the ingredients (only 1 person per family is allowed in the store and i cannot be trusted because i come home with a whole bunch of junk food lol). 1 of the ingredients were pie crust, i told him the pie crust are in the refrigerated section near the eggs and where the cookie dough is. he came home with pie crust from the freezer in a pie plate already....i have never seen these in my life and the pie dish was not deep. this was the outcome of using pie crust i have never made before. apparently the egg custard somehow got under the pie crusts while baking, and that big bubble in the middle is the pie crust

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Maiun
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Lesson 1. Make your own pie crust. Lesson 2. Pastry formula: half fat to flour. EG. 8 oz flour 4 oz fat. Lesson 3. Use butter, freeze it, grate it into the flour, cut together with a butter knife, add COLD water( 1/4 to 1/2 a cup) gradually, stirring gently until dough comes together, leave in fridge for 30 mins before rolling out (this lets the gluten in the flour relax and stops the pastry being tough) Enjoy

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#29

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

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Oaklynn Emberly
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This are the kind of pictures that you just keep laughing at even though you can’t figure out what exactly is so funny about them.

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#30

Quarantine-Baking-Fails

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Note: this post originally had 45 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.