Parent Asks How To Protect Son From ‘Catching’ Autism From His Friend, Gets A Wake-Up Call From The Commenters
Interview
While the internet can be an amazing place to learn about the world, unfortunately, not everyone uses that opportunity. Even with so much information about autism available at our fingertips, there are still some pretty ignorant people out there who believe nonsense and can’t find even 5 minutes to Google the scientific truth.
Case in point, one person’s incredibly insensitive question that they posed on Quora has gone viral, and internet users can’t believe that someone could be so ignorant. Somebody said that their son hangs out with an autistic child, exclaimed that they don’t want their kid to become autistic, and asked how they could “nip this problem in the bud.”
Well, Reddit user Kewlgemini06 shut the person down with a strongly-worded and witty answer. They didn’t hold back. Scroll down, have a read, and let us know what you think about the situation in the comments below, dear Pandas. Bored Panda reached out to Kewlgemini06, whose real name is Ron Sarraf-Berrios and who is a step-parent to a child on the spectrum, and spoke to him about the situation. Read on for the full interview.
Somebody very ignorant about autism asked a question on Quora and was promptly shut down
Image credits: reddit.com
“I think the single biggest myth about autism is that it is a disease that can be “caught” either from someone else or from a vaccine. Autism is a condition where the brain is wired differently, like being left-handed or a musical prodigy,” Ron told Bored Panda.
He said that he was “floored” when he first saw the question on quora. “It didn’t occur to me that they could have been a troll until redditors started commenting that, and yet the fact that they deleted their question on Quora after I posted my response tells me they weren’t a troll. As a step-parent of a child on the spectrum, it really disgusted me, so I framed my response to shame them as much as I could.”
He added: “I just want every person out there to know that raising a child with autism is not easy but neither is raising a child with a sports talent or musical ability and having to deal with all that comes with it. Raising a child is hard but an autistic child can bring so much love into your life. My kid is 18 and never went through that ‘I hate you’ phase and still wants daily hugs and to spend time with his parents. I would never want that to go away.”
“As long as more people see the post and realize how ugly that person’s question was, I’m happy”
There’s a bit of drama surrounding the Quora screenshot, as some people appear to be trying to get a lot of karma on Reddit without crediting the original poster (there was even a mock trial on Reddit about this). Kewlgemini06 originally posted about their Quora comeback in Reddit’s r/autism community where their post got 11.2k upvotes.
The original poster’s answer got a lot of people’s attention and some saw it as an opportunity to get some of that popularity for themselves. So much so that some redditors posted Kewlgemini06’s Quora answer on different subreddits without properly crediting them. Most recently, the story got reposted on the r/MurderedByWords subreddit where it got over 62.9k upvotes and on the r/memes subreddit for over 147k upvotes.
Bored Panda asked Ron to share his thoughts about some of the drama surrounding his post. “To me, the most important thing is that it is read by as many people as possible to spread awareness. However, as an actual human with emotions and feelings, I’m a little hurt, it would be nice to be credited or if Reddit had methods to correct for intellectual theft like YouTube has. But, as long as more people see the post and realize how ugly that person’s question was, I’m happy.”
People believe a lot of myths about autism
But back to the main topic, there are a lot of misconceptions and myths about autism. For example, some people believe that those who have autism don’t want friends. Meanwhile, the truth is that some people with autism struggle with social skills which makes it hard for them to interact with others in the same way.
There’s another widespread myth that people with autism can’t feel or express any emotions. That’s not true: they simply communicate their emotions and perceive everyone else’s emotions in different ways. And no, autism doesn’t spread by talking to people who have autism! It’s a developmental disorder that appears during infancy or in childhood.
This is how people reacted to the situation online
There are other kids out there who have parents that are ‘insane’ and here are some of the ways that they reacted to similar situations
Image credits: reddit.com
Image credits: reddit.com
Image credits: reddit.com
Image credits: reddit.com
Image credits: reddit.com
Is this person being ignorant? Of course, however, rather than telling them are an idiot, how about just saying, "Autism is not contagious. I recommend you do more research if you are confused. Here are some reliable resources." You call someone stupid, they stop listening.Your point is lost.
I agree 100%! Negativity is never solved with more negativity.
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That makes me sad. My daughter is a social butterfly and WANTS to make friends desperately but unfortunately she really struggles with social skills. She is loud, makes weird noises, acts immature, doesn’t understand social rules and cues, struggles with verbal communication and often interprets things wrong, or says things the wrong way because she struggles with sentence structuring. She also takes thing literally, very sensitive and her emotions go from one extreme to another but she is also loyal, kind and caring. She desperately wants good friends and I want that for her too. Maintaining a friendship for her has been impossible especially maintaining a HEALTHY friendship where the person takes advantage of my daughter. My daughter is no saint but using her as a scapegoat, being caught out lying multiple times, stealing money from my daughter, calling her a r****d etc. Sorry rant over. Just hope my son doesn’t go through the same thing and that one day soon my daughter will find a special friend that she can rely on, who she can trust.
In the hopes of supporting you :) I struggled with a lot of that for yeeeears and then one day suddenly learned and caught up very fast. This may or may not happen with your daughter, but occasionally there are people who don't improve at all for years and then do. The best advice I can give you is prepare for both outcomes. Also I never made very good friends as a kid but as an adult I have very good friends who are kind and true. Some of us maybe have an ideal friend making age- during the process I felt lonely but looking back I am happy I didn't make friends then, I wasn't ready for them, and they weren't ready for me. However every child is different and I honestly believe when it's right for her it will happen :)
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While the posters question was dumb and insensitive, insulting him/her isn't exactly good manners either and will accomplish nothing. Who ever listened to anyone insulting them? Who ever changed their opinion on anything when the opposing argument was littered with insults?
Agreed. It's a matter of incredible ignorance. It should be explained to that person that autism is not contagious.
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I wish people would stop seeing autism as a "problem" that needs to be "fixed".
Autism is not only not contagious, it also is not even close to a disease. It is more a ... part of a spectrum that represents a lot of things, maybe (not attempting to be complete here) most relevant - those the majority see as "autistic" are less likely to obey stupid rules and less likely to willingly give into the process of uniformization in school, which is the main purpose of school. In other words, it is less comfortable to interact with them if you're a lazy MF who doesn't care about the other person.
As a person with autism, I think this is B******T. I’ve learned that when I was younger in school, nobody out of my class, not even my teachers, knew what autism was so my classmates kept making jokes about something they don’t even know. They called weird things ‘autistic’. Until I told them all I had autism and for the rest of the year they were silent. And I hate people who think autism can be caused. You’re born with it, it’s in your genes. Just wanted to say that.
Let me guess. This person who’s so damn worried about their kid “catching” autism from a playmate is probably one of the ones bitching about having to quarantine and wear a mask in public places—-claiming the mask is keeping them from breathing. They need to stop talking, stop claiming they have asthma, take the cigarette out of their mouth, save their breath, and put their damn mask on—-and I don’t mean wear it under their nose or over their mouth FFS (I have seen both, believe it or not)—-the rest of us don’t want THEIR germs.
Autism isn't even contagious trust me since i would of caught it already if it was contagious since i have a autistic brother
You choose the people you want to be friends with but you can't choose the people that make your family. Some people are lucky and some people are less fortunate. But that doesn't mean you can't be the one you want to be. Although that can be hard when you've been living in a racist, prejudiced, sexist, homophobic violent or ignorant family for years. It's quite difficult to get rid of the poison that they have been injecting during that time.
she is a mega karen and should deal with it, im 11 and i HATE her, i dont even know her name
One Mom wouldn't allow her son to be friends with my son becaus my son had a catastrophic illness and it might upset her son when mine died, My son asked me,"Doesn't she know everybody dies someday?"
About "autistic behaviors". :) An "autistic behavior" could mean anything because the spectrum is so broad, and also some of the behaviors of people with autism are just like those without it. It could also be a good behavior like focusing well, so that may not be bad (but again, this isn't in "all" autism, everyone is different) most importantly, what you want is for them not to pick up "bad behavior," which is not inherently all autistic behaviors". Treat it like any other kid you wouldn't want them to copy. They will always be around someone you don't want them to copy, autism or no. :) It's not about the exposure to the behavior- it's about how you deal with the exposure to the behavior.
I am autistic :) on the chance that perhaps the mother is concerned about behavior: treat it like you would any other child. Explain what are not good behaviors to copy, and that while others may have a more difficult time with that, tell your child they are their own person and that they don't need to copy others. Now, that said... Get to know their new friend and learn about them with an open mind. Being friends with someone different than you can sometimes be a great opportunity to develop emotional growth and tolerance.
I'd like to add that everyone with autism is very different so if you had one experience it may not share any similarities. Also it's always possible, whether you're autistic or not, to be caught having a bad day. :) We should all try not to judge people from one impression alone.
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Great question. Its like "my son started to play with a black boy, what we can do to avoid to catch our son dark skin?" :-) Btw. I am also autistic...
100% of quara questions are bs, can't believe how many people still believe them.
People need to understand that autism is not a disease you can catch like STDs and that having it doesn't mean that their is something wrong with you and you need to be avoided.
Maybe it's the same person who totally don't worry about catching coronavirus and refuse to wear a mask.
Has no one considered the possibility the Original Poster is a troll? I think they are
If you want an interesting household, have one son that is on the near genius level and the other, the youngest, be mildly autistic and developmentally delayed. They were five years apart. With my wife and I also being heavily involved with the local bi-county training center, we get to meet many other adults with autism and/or developmental delay issues. Some are even physically handicapped. I have never met a more open and honest, sometimes to a fault, group of adults. We have been fortunate to have been able to keep ours at home due to my wife and I having different work schedules.
You know that people with autism are most of the time genius? Ever heard of Albert Einstein? And the one who knew the most numbers of pi out of his head? Okay, everyone is different, so not all people with autism are that smart. And most of the time they want to learn only things they find interesting.
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"There are no stupid questions, but there sure are a lot of inquisitive idiots!". That being said, it can be a justified-but-badly phrased worry about copying behaviours.
"How do you nip it in the bud?"... Probably should of gotten your tubes tied. World needs less ignorance and your going to pass down all your sh*t to your offspring. Next time make sure its a BJ. I am one not to have offspring. For good reason. Lmao.
Is this person being ignorant? Of course, however, rather than telling them are an idiot, how about just saying, "Autism is not contagious. I recommend you do more research if you are confused. Here are some reliable resources." You call someone stupid, they stop listening.Your point is lost.
I agree 100%! Negativity is never solved with more negativity.
Load More Replies... That makes me sad. My daughter is a social butterfly and WANTS to make friends desperately but unfortunately she really struggles with social skills. She is loud, makes weird noises, acts immature, doesn’t understand social rules and cues, struggles with verbal communication and often interprets things wrong, or says things the wrong way because she struggles with sentence structuring. She also takes thing literally, very sensitive and her emotions go from one extreme to another but she is also loyal, kind and caring. She desperately wants good friends and I want that for her too. Maintaining a friendship for her has been impossible especially maintaining a HEALTHY friendship where the person takes advantage of my daughter. My daughter is no saint but using her as a scapegoat, being caught out lying multiple times, stealing money from my daughter, calling her a r****d etc. Sorry rant over. Just hope my son doesn’t go through the same thing and that one day soon my daughter will find a special friend that she can rely on, who she can trust.
In the hopes of supporting you :) I struggled with a lot of that for yeeeears and then one day suddenly learned and caught up very fast. This may or may not happen with your daughter, but occasionally there are people who don't improve at all for years and then do. The best advice I can give you is prepare for both outcomes. Also I never made very good friends as a kid but as an adult I have very good friends who are kind and true. Some of us maybe have an ideal friend making age- during the process I felt lonely but looking back I am happy I didn't make friends then, I wasn't ready for them, and they weren't ready for me. However every child is different and I honestly believe when it's right for her it will happen :)
Load More Replies... While the posters question was dumb and insensitive, insulting him/her isn't exactly good manners either and will accomplish nothing. Who ever listened to anyone insulting them? Who ever changed their opinion on anything when the opposing argument was littered with insults?
Agreed. It's a matter of incredible ignorance. It should be explained to that person that autism is not contagious.
Load More Replies... I wish people would stop seeing autism as a "problem" that needs to be "fixed".
Autism is not only not contagious, it also is not even close to a disease. It is more a ... part of a spectrum that represents a lot of things, maybe (not attempting to be complete here) most relevant - those the majority see as "autistic" are less likely to obey stupid rules and less likely to willingly give into the process of uniformization in school, which is the main purpose of school. In other words, it is less comfortable to interact with them if you're a lazy MF who doesn't care about the other person.
As a person with autism, I think this is B******T. I’ve learned that when I was younger in school, nobody out of my class, not even my teachers, knew what autism was so my classmates kept making jokes about something they don’t even know. They called weird things ‘autistic’. Until I told them all I had autism and for the rest of the year they were silent. And I hate people who think autism can be caused. You’re born with it, it’s in your genes. Just wanted to say that.
Let me guess. This person who’s so damn worried about their kid “catching” autism from a playmate is probably one of the ones bitching about having to quarantine and wear a mask in public places—-claiming the mask is keeping them from breathing. They need to stop talking, stop claiming they have asthma, take the cigarette out of their mouth, save their breath, and put their damn mask on—-and I don’t mean wear it under their nose or over their mouth FFS (I have seen both, believe it or not)—-the rest of us don’t want THEIR germs.
Autism isn't even contagious trust me since i would of caught it already if it was contagious since i have a autistic brother
You choose the people you want to be friends with but you can't choose the people that make your family. Some people are lucky and some people are less fortunate. But that doesn't mean you can't be the one you want to be. Although that can be hard when you've been living in a racist, prejudiced, sexist, homophobic violent or ignorant family for years. It's quite difficult to get rid of the poison that they have been injecting during that time.
she is a mega karen and should deal with it, im 11 and i HATE her, i dont even know her name
One Mom wouldn't allow her son to be friends with my son becaus my son had a catastrophic illness and it might upset her son when mine died, My son asked me,"Doesn't she know everybody dies someday?"
About "autistic behaviors". :) An "autistic behavior" could mean anything because the spectrum is so broad, and also some of the behaviors of people with autism are just like those without it. It could also be a good behavior like focusing well, so that may not be bad (but again, this isn't in "all" autism, everyone is different) most importantly, what you want is for them not to pick up "bad behavior," which is not inherently all autistic behaviors". Treat it like any other kid you wouldn't want them to copy. They will always be around someone you don't want them to copy, autism or no. :) It's not about the exposure to the behavior- it's about how you deal with the exposure to the behavior.
I am autistic :) on the chance that perhaps the mother is concerned about behavior: treat it like you would any other child. Explain what are not good behaviors to copy, and that while others may have a more difficult time with that, tell your child they are their own person and that they don't need to copy others. Now, that said... Get to know their new friend and learn about them with an open mind. Being friends with someone different than you can sometimes be a great opportunity to develop emotional growth and tolerance.
I'd like to add that everyone with autism is very different so if you had one experience it may not share any similarities. Also it's always possible, whether you're autistic or not, to be caught having a bad day. :) We should all try not to judge people from one impression alone.
Load More Replies... Great question. Its like "my son started to play with a black boy, what we can do to avoid to catch our son dark skin?" :-) Btw. I am also autistic...
100% of quara questions are bs, can't believe how many people still believe them.
People need to understand that autism is not a disease you can catch like STDs and that having it doesn't mean that their is something wrong with you and you need to be avoided.
Maybe it's the same person who totally don't worry about catching coronavirus and refuse to wear a mask.
Has no one considered the possibility the Original Poster is a troll? I think they are
If you want an interesting household, have one son that is on the near genius level and the other, the youngest, be mildly autistic and developmentally delayed. They were five years apart. With my wife and I also being heavily involved with the local bi-county training center, we get to meet many other adults with autism and/or developmental delay issues. Some are even physically handicapped. I have never met a more open and honest, sometimes to a fault, group of adults. We have been fortunate to have been able to keep ours at home due to my wife and I having different work schedules.
You know that people with autism are most of the time genius? Ever heard of Albert Einstein? And the one who knew the most numbers of pi out of his head? Okay, everyone is different, so not all people with autism are that smart. And most of the time they want to learn only things they find interesting.
Load More Replies... "There are no stupid questions, but there sure are a lot of inquisitive idiots!". That being said, it can be a justified-but-badly phrased worry about copying behaviours.
"How do you nip it in the bud?"... Probably should of gotten your tubes tied. World needs less ignorance and your going to pass down all your sh*t to your offspring. Next time make sure its a BJ. I am one not to have offspring. For good reason. Lmao.
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