Psychologists think we tend to ignore red flags because we simply don’t want to be right. Falling in love can really mess up our minds, and turning a blind eye to behavior that’s obviously not right is one way. After all, finding someone you truly like is like winning the lottery these days, but no matter how much we’d want to fall in love, some glaring signs indicate we may be better off without them.
Examples of Red Flags (Funny But True)
When X user Lauren Chanel (formerly of Twitter) asked, “What’s a simple red flag that has never failed you? Something small like a person quoting 48 Laws of Power”—it struck a chord with many people.
The illuminating replies started pouring in, and they definitely shed light on what to be cautious about in our love interests. You might find some of the biggest red flags in a guy funny at first glance, but they actually reveal what kind of a person they are. From people who say they hate animals to “littering,” some things may look basic or funny at first, but when you really think about it…
Whether you find the biggest red flags in a girl funny or not, the following compilation may save you from taking the wrong step. By the way, this isn't just a collection of funny red flags for girls; it includes funny red flags for guys, too!
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Took a woman on a date years ago who did that. Had our waitress constantly attending our table, you could tell she got off on having a "servant." It was a major turnoff. Didn't go out with her again after that.
I have always wondered why people think that it is alright to say that they hate cats. The general response would be "Yeah, I get it. Cats are assholes." If you say you hate a dog, then the whole world is against you. "How dare you hate a dog? What sort of sub-human are you?" To cat-haters: what in the world did a cat ever do to you? So, yes, I'd run far, far away from someone who would harm a cat, or any animal, really.
Have you ever been in love? Your best friend, your family friend, your parent? If so, you’d know very well how love changes people. Thankfully, the transformation is usually for the better, but sometimes, we fall head over heels so deeply that we lose the ability to detect doubts and other negative reactions we have with our love interests.
Elite Daily interviewed some experts. Here’s what they had to say about blind love and its impact on the people in the relationship.
In fact, very few of us are immune to this phenomenon, says nationally recognized psychotherapist Dr. LeslieBeth Wish, who considers blind love to be something that doesn’t have to do with appearances. It usually hits during the honeymoon phase, when we still haven’t had enough time to experience the negative side of our loved ones.
According to relationship expert Susan Winter, who also spoke to Elite Daily, the honeymoon phase brings all the best parts of our significant others to the spotlight. “We haven’t experienced the many times they’ll disappoint, let us down, and hurt us. These are the things that occur later in a relationship. Without knowing the totality of our partner, we are forced to see them in a state of love blindness.”
omg - the most violent person I know is a huge litter bug - flings stuff all over the place, disgusting...also a serial domestic abuser and physically violent
Took my date to a great restaurant where one of my best friends was our waiter. I introduced them to each other. On the ride home my date said to me " I cannot believe you would introduce me to a waiter... and what is it with you wearing a trench coat to a luxe restaurant.. don't you have anything nicer?" LAST DATE.
After the honeymoon phase ends, many lovebirds start to see and experience the not-so-pretty side of their relationship. This is why recognizing your initial doubts at the beginning of a relationship is crucial. Cherlyn Chong, a dating and breakup recovery coach, suggests seeking a person who can meet one’s needs “regardless of surface or social standing.”
“They need to not completely judge people right off the bat, but they should also prioritize those compatibility traits.” Thus, often, that very first hint of a negative reaction you have may be the most telling one. Basically, don’t ignore the red flags!
That's part of someone's identity, It's important you get it right to respect them if they are sensitive or feel more comfortable with you doing so.
A basic apology demonstrates remorse for something you did or didn't do. You start by saying "I'm sorry." Then you identify what it was that you did or didn't do to offend, you show you understand it hurt or offended the other person and how it hurt or offended them, and you tell them what you will do to avoid repeating it in the future. For example: "Hey, John- I'm sorry I told Mike you were getting divorced. You told me that in confidence and I know I betrayed your trust by sharing it with him. I value your trust, John, and promise you that if you ever confide in me again, my lips will be sealed." Notice I didn't offer an excuse like "I did it just that one time" or " I didn't know it wasn't public info." OWN IT when you apologize. Explaining yourself can come later if THEY request it. Otherwise, you're just throwing out excuses and not owning it.
Ex friend kept doing this to me. I would start a conversation that she would wave away with with the comment 'oh, you and your x idea' as though it was weird when it was usually just something I'd seen in the news and wanted to share thinking she'd be interested. She'd roll her eyes and pull faces if she didn't understand or agree. She would demean compliments I got from people to make them appear worthless. I realised her low self esteem got a boost from belittling me. People who only feel better when they try to diminish you are not genuine friends. Real friends would want to listen and support you. Even if you miss the fun times (I do) it's truly not worth the other times when you go home upset and thinking 'what on earth was that for?'.
People who won't apologise. Accept it if you have stuffed up. There is no weakness in recognising that and saying sorry to those you have hurt. It is weak to try and hide it, cowardly to try and pretend you did nothing wrong.
In UK, in most supermarkets, you have to put a £1 coin to get a trolley. If you want your coin back, you must return the trolley. (and yes, we call it a trolley!)
We have that here in the US for certain stores. Aldi in particular stands out as one that does that.
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"All people who don't return shopping carts are bad" or possibly disabled & couldn't get a spot close to the store. Or have a small child that they can't leave unattended in the car.
I'll give you the disabled part. But you know that you can take your child with you to get the cart back, right? I mean, in (most parts of) Europe, we have children as well, and we are still able to return the carts in 99,9% of the cases. (Because there's this coin-thing and if you want the coin back, you have to return the cart, but it works even on stores without those in 99%). Just bring the darn cart back, it's not that hard!
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I love their little title about the 2nd impeachment, wish I had thought of it.
No. Some of us are disabled. Some have small children. If it takes you 60 seconds and no additional pain or inconvenience congratulations but take a beat Before you know everyone's life
Yeah. The poster is correct - people who don't return their carts are spoiled and lazy and egoistic. If you are disabled, that's a different thing. fine. But a child? What did you do with it while you were shopping? You probably had it next to you or in the cart, right? So... novel concept, put it BACK in the cart, get the cart to the cart-stand, take kid out and return to car. Walking is healthy anyway.
Load More Replies... I've been to Walmarts where the carts run amok in the parking lot, and have hit stationed vehicles. I don't understand the laziness and cavalier attitude of some customers. But then, what did I expect?
I can’t speak for all customers. For me, it’s not laziness. It’s safety. My Walmart’s cart collection racks are very sporadic. You may have to walk an aisle over to put your cart back. I personally don’t feel comfortable leaving my car seat age children unattended and often out of sight for however long it might take me to track down a collection rack. Plus, I’m in Phoenix so it gets dangerously hot inside the car during the summer. So, I leave my cart up towards the front of my car in a way it won’t hit other cars and allows others to park in adjacent spots without hitting it. But Walmart is the only store I abandon my cart. I’ve actually spoken to the GM about putting in more collection racks.
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Same thing with people that don't put the chair back under the table at the office, restaurant, ... when they leave.
I'm 75, I have severe osteoarthritis and mobility impairment. I'm lucky to be able to walk in and out of a store at all. I don't return shopping carts because walking even a few steps is extremely painful, and I'm damn tired of people saying I'm a bad person because I don't return a cart.
Disagree. I usually return a shopping cart but there have been times when I can't. I have a chronic illness by the time I get in &out of a groc store, put things in the car, my body won't go anymore. I feel badly i can't walk it back, but I try to make sure its not in the way of any vehicle. I'm not a bad person, by a long shot.
For people with disabilities, it may help to walk with the support of a cart. After walking all through a grocery store, returning the cart and then walking back to the car without that support can be really difficult. Is it really that hard for able-bodied people to help with that?
I do find using a trolley to support me while walking actually is helpful and easier but I'd still return the trolley to the proper location. As David rightly points out I have to walk to the trolley and I have to walk away from it at some point. I do use walking aids and suffer a great deal of pain but why should that be other people's problem? Disabled parking spaces are next to the shops and next to the trolley collection points. I use these as I have a blue badge. These things are provided to help me, so I make the effort to do what I can to not be a problem to other people. Love a non able-bodied person.
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Here in Ecuador most big supermarkets have avoided that problem by hiring people (usually young students) to help shoppers pack their groceries, take the shopping carts to the cars, stash the groceries in the trunk and return the carts. They always get tipped. It creates jobs, is a great help for some people (especially the elderly) and we have zero carts on the loose :) I aggree that those who physically can should return them...but saying that "all people who don't do so are bad" is assuming everyone always can...and there is no such thing as "always"...Just my humble opinion.
Recent research suggests that people who don't return trollies are nastier people in general compared to those that do.
I would add to that those people who use the electric carts and don't plug them back in when they're done. Please let the next person who needs it have a good charge! It sux when you go to use one and it's dead.
And the ones who don't return carts block parking spaces with where they leave it. These people all have the asshole gene.
It's not some abstract person. Someone has to retrieve the carts from the parking lot. If everyone left their cart wherever, not only would that person's job be unnecessarily harder, but everyone's cars would get dinged up.
The trigger for me is when people just put their cart behind the car next to them so they can back out. Forcing someone else to take your cart back ... grrr.
In my country we solved this by cutting off the hands and feet of those who do not return their shopping carts. Once we severe the limbs of an octagenerian who claimed he coudn't return it because he felt like he was having a stroke.
Nice idea. We only have them put coins in that only get returned when they return the carts, but I like your approach
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I could have left mine today in the carpark but I pushed it back to the shop. It took one minute.
I once watched Twatilina walk six parking spots away from her car and abandon her cart. She stopped two parking spots away from the collection rack and left the cart directly behind a truck trying to back out of the parking spot. I lost my s**t. As I’m walking over to give her a verbal butt kicking, the truck she left her cart behind started backing up, hit the cart, and somehow got the cart lodged under the tail bed. This bish starts laughing and crossing her legs like she was going to pee herself. I seriously wanted to slap Satan out of her.
I used to work in a grocery store a long time ago. I always return my cart and if i have a minute will help to straighten up the corral as well. Respect people who are working to make your life easier, people!
I don't like this one, as a rule, I do usually return a cart, but at the same time, if your hands are full and you have fussy kids, or are in a rush or something. Life happens, not ALL people who don't return shopping carts are bad. Thats ridiculous.
You could shop with your kids, but you can't return the cart. It doesn't make any sense.
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Failing to do so (barring physical limitations) means you either don't realize it negatively impacts others (Yikes!) or realize it and don't care (Double Yikes!).
Not sure why Jess got downvoted. No one is hired to just put carts away. Besides, if your not putting it back in the rack then your leaving it in a parking spot where someone may want to park.
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Yup. Saw one left in a parking lot, during a horrible storm, sooner or later that would've hit someone's car, so since no one else was gonna do anything, I ran to it and returned it to it's proper place. (And then once I saw 3 of them in a row, in a parking lot, put through two parking spaces. WHY?)
A few years ago I had just parked my car when the woman in the car next to mine pushed her trolley out of her way but partially blocking my car.. I suggested she push it back to the collection point, some 50 metres away. She refused, saying that there were people payed to collect the trolleys. I waited until she was about to reverse out before pushing her trolley behind her car, She then had no option but to get out and move it.
Especially people who leave shopping carts in Handicap parking spots!
this is one of the stupidest things I have ever read. It's a law in my country, no leaving your kids or vehicle unattended. So I should break A LAW so you feel better about me as a person? the sort of people who say "not everyone who does this thing is good, but everyone who doesn't is evil" are usually the most self absorbed, judgemental, ignorant scumbags on earth, and they're pissy because nobody cares about their imbecilic opinions
when I worked 3rd shift at walmart we had to go out at 3 o'clock in the morning to round up shopping carts from the far corners of the parking lot. try doing that in a sleet storm without cursing people that can't be bothered to take care of their carts.
I call those people sheep, because you often see several carts that people have put in one space, rather than return them to the cart return areas. Like, one person did it, so I’m gonna follow their lead and do that same thing= sheep.
I carpooled to the gym with a woman who, after working out , would never return the shopping cart after picking up groceries. ????
This is me: I return them every time, but see my comment above in support of principled laziness.
This was a basic measurement used in a recent informal study on how much of an asshole somebody was.
I return my trolley majority of the time, the only time I don’t is when my pain is flaring up severely and the trolley bay is a bit of a distance away. Otherwise in the trolley bay it goes.
Sorry, but that’s not a legitimate excuse. If you can walk around the grocery store pushing the trolley in that much pain, you can walk the few extra feet/meters to put the trolley in the bay. I say that as someone who suffers constant pain with occasional severe flare ups and weakness in their right side.
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So my dad isn't a bad person he just is disabled and struggles walking in stores for long time but won't use a motorized cart because he doesn't want to admit he's weak. So he sometimes leaves a cart in the lot if he's not parked right next to the place for the carts.
Some people who don't return shopping carts, like me, are disabled and can't walk the extra distance to the cart corral or back to the store and back out again. Don't generalize.
than again in my area a guy is paid to retrieve those shopping carts from all over and is getting paid..
Judgmental much? I can barely walk with the cart. After unloading the best I can do is not leave it in someone's way. So according to you, I'm bad...
Had a woman leave her trolley behind my car. When I asked to move it she refused saying there were people employed to collect them. I waited until she started her engine then I pushed the trolley behind her car. She HAD to move it then.
I give a pass for people who don't drive. I remember having to walk home with heavy groceries and It killed me. A lot of times I left the cart at the end of the parking lot. if I'm lucky enough to have a ride I always return them.
This! At my grocery store, we have to wait in line, because they let in a certain number of people. Even if you only need milk, you still have to take a cart: 1) that way they know how many people are inside, 2) it helps maintain a safe distance between people. When you're first in line, you see inside the people at the cash register who just leave their carts there instead of bringing it back to the worker at the entrance (and there's only 1 access door!). It's not even a detour, it's on the way out. When I see that, I call them on it: what, you think you're too good to bring your cart back? Or: you're a pile of s**t for not bringing your cart back!
At Aldi, a store here in KY, if you want a cart you have to put in a quarter. To get the quarter back, you have to put the cart back. I haven't seen another store that does this.
I won't if I have to walk away from my car with a child or pet inside. Guess I am bad.
What? What do you do when you are shopping? With the child or pet.
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I always put my cart back in the parking lot corral, to make it a bit easier for the person who gathers them.
We have a few stores that require a coin some are a dollar and some take a quarter here. They quit when COVID19 hit however some have started requiring the coin again. I have coin sized slugs attached to my keys so I never walk away without it. The city gave them away years ago when they opened the first recycling depot.
omg, I just got a hip replacement and for the last two months I could barely walk. I felt awful leaving it where I parked but couldn't manage to get back to my car without leaning on it. I ended up in a wheelchair and started ordering groceries and will keep it up I think due to covid getting so bad again where we live. At Aldi, at least I could often give it to people and say to save their quarter.
I always put my cart back, my mom never does and when pestered about it she said she doesn't because the grocery stores here hire special needs individuals to pick up the carts and she's afraid if she doesn't she will be taking their job.
Your mom is full of more s**t than a goose. "Someone" still needs to bring the carts from the corral into the store.
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I don't know if I would make a sweeping statement that people who don't return their shopping cart or trolley as being bad, but one sure thing is that they are lazy...
stopping their carts smack dab in the middle of the aisle to go look for something, can't you pull off to the side.
For a few years, I did some volunteer work where I walked around a carpark to return stray trolleys
Or they could be depressed or severely distressed. I have bipolar disorder. I always return shopping carts, except when I'm depressed. Then I sometimes cannot summon the energy.
So a disabled seniior who, in spite of a miriad of physical problems, must still do their grocery shopping should walk extra painful steps to do what a young able-bodied person is paid to do? You, sir are unworthy to be called an ass!
sorry, can't agree with this assessment. as a disabled person i use the cart for support when shopping. when i can't find a place close to the cart corral (where you leave them when done) i have left them in a spot that won't block a car space. even with a cane it is hard to push and direct a cart with one hand. so, occasionally, i am guilty of this.
I have a disabled child. I can not put my groceries and child in the car then return the cart. I don't see how this makes me a "bad person"
I have a serious issue with this... it's absolute BS. They used to have employees for it... typically young people in their first job who bagged groceries, helped customers out to their cars, and who collected carts from the park lot. This is just abuse of customers (and workers) by food retailers engaging in social manipulation to benefit their bottom line. First it was cart returns, then scanning your groceries. What's next... getting customers to stock shelves?
I completely disagree... we had this out on a mom group I was on. Women with multiple small children get a pass on this from my perspective. There are those who can handle it, but many who struggle with controlling their kids from cart to car OR leaving them in the car while taking back the cart. Not everyone is as strong as you are and deserve some slack.
How do they GET the cart with the kids then? They can absolutely do the same thing in reverse.
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I have to disagree here. I have painful knees (bone on bone) and I need surgery. Every step is pain. So I don't return shopping carts. I will when I have new knees again.
Snap! Bone on bone hurts doesn't it? Guess what? I still return my trolley. Not just my knees are bad but my shoulders too - I don't expect people to take my shopping out the cart for me so why should they return the trolley I abandon? I just get on with it.
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How did you get your cart then? Did you leave him in the car or bring him with you? You can return your cart the same way, dumb ass.
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I'm confused... you're full of s**t and yet you're an asshole. How does that work?
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Why put the child in the care BEFORE returning the shopping-cart?
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Then bring your kid with you. It isn't rocket science.
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"The reason why I don't return the cart is because it supports someone's job." - This must be the same stupid thinking that gets Republicans elected. Newsflash, dude, the same person who gathers the carts from the cart corral, is the same person who chases them from around the parking lot. You not returning the cart does not save this person's job, it makes their job harder and you an idiot. By your logic, littering is good because someone will get paid to pick up after you.
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Similar to "if they will cheat with you, they will cheat on you."
My sister would believe 100% every critical story about every new boyfriend's exes. Boyfriend after boyfriend - they all had evil exes. Then, shock, discover that her boyfriends were actually the people with the problem. Not saying that applies in all cases but be wary if it's a trend in the partners you pick.
I used to work as a cleaner. I couldn't understand why some people would leave their lunch rubbish on the table when you had to pass the bin to leave the room!
IMHO? We have to be careful what we mean by "drama", as in, do we mean overexaggerating small problems, or do we mean the person is a self-fulfilling prophecy of doom, or do we mean that they had bad luck and are feeling crappy about it?
I've never been religious, but I do like that line in the bible about how when you do good deeds it doesn't count if you brag about it afterwards. Because it's true - you should do kind, charitable things for their own sake, not just to make yourself look good.
I hate this one. People have always been having their feelings hurt by insensitive (and bigoted) comments. It's just that nowadays it's much more acceptable to call people out on it. For example, decades ago, women had to just quietly take workplace harassment or be fired.
I disagree with this one. There is a lot of politically correct racist and misogynist things said and there are a lot of not politically correct things which are not racist and misogynistic. The preamble is to recognize that you may not agree with what they are saying. That doesn't make it automatically wrong.
Or... I'm a nice person.... it's not for them to judge, it's for people who know them to decide if that's what they think.
It's easy to assume women who don't have women friends must not like women. When really tons of us are just too f*ckin shy ^.^;;
I think the key of the OPs concern is that the men who say she's perfect barely know her... a bit premature to make such an evaluation. Plus those men probably have unrealistic expectations about a relationship with her...
Oh! I have one red flag! People who do not like others JUST because they like different things and judging others by it.
Note: this post originally had 59 images. It’s been shortened to the top 40 images based on user votes.
Beware of the Red Flags!
Did you enjoy those funny red flags? Well, we hope you did and also learned a thing or two about blind love. So, next time you notice a red flag, don’t turn a blind eye to it. What are some of the red flags that you have experienced? Don’t forget to let us know in the comments. Also, share this with your friends and steer them away from these red flags!
Why do so many people think this is about women hating on men? The red flags can apply to anyone, I can apply a few of these to former friends and colleagues, some of which I wish I had have realised sooner. People other than lovers can cause you pain.
Maybe someone made several accounts, and then downvoted all the comments? I don't know how else this would have happened.
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"If you can't handle me at my worst then you don't deserve me at my best".. Whatever happened to learning to controlling your emotions so you don't hurt other people.
What if they're referring to a physical illness they can't control that have led a lot of people to reject them during a flare-up? Maybe they just want someone who won't leave when they're ill and bedridden ?
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"This is just how I am, take it or leave it." These people do nothing to improve themselves and take no accountability for their actions. Everyone just has to accept them and compromise for them every single time.
are we being red flags by saying that we don't have flaws and complaining about others tho?
Red flag: a guy going out with a girl and refering to her as "the whore I went out with" when she is nota around anymore :(
Someone who expected an apology even though they know they're wrong.
"You're either for me or against me"...actually, I am capable of having my own opinions and still having a working relationship with you. I am allowed to disagree with you in a respectful way.
Two more: 1. People who never compromise. 2. People who have/had good parents and don't respect them, take advantage of them or aren't grateful for the things or advantages they give them.
I'm really glad that people finally talking about these things, it's not kindness when you try to tolerate the red flags, it's toxic.
When a person refuses to even acknowledge something you are extremely interested in. Personally, I am interested in cars. I can go on and on about cars, and I try my absolute best not to. When something really exciting happens in the car world, I want to tell people I like because I'm excited about it! It is really harmful to stop someone from talking about something they're passionate about/enjoy and then berate what they want to say.
Red flag: Bored panda not blocking the racist who has been plenty of hateful and racist comments and been reported multiple times.
And suddenly everyone is downvoted a few points...ooh whoever could it be XD (I upvoted you one bk)
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Red flag to me is someone's jealousy over how well others are doing professionally,personally etc.
Anyone who HAD to tell me they were Christian was always trouble . . . AND . . . Anyone who wanted to call me something else after I told them my name meant anything I said would be dismissed.
When someone posts hate speech like Amelija Janavicius has, don't downvote it, report it. Like I just did. Pandas don't tolerate hate speech.
Amelija Janavicius is only capable of one comment. All her posts are identical. Poor child; obviously not capable of functioning as a human being.
Mimi: To report; go all the way right on the dark menu bar : more > contact> report post I have reported her as well, I think she is friends with the staff...
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People who don't understand the concept of "Freedom of Speech" in the US and seem to think it means that they can say whatever the hell they want no matter how inflammatory or offensive without suffering consequences. Freedom of Speech means that you can say something without the US government kicking in your door and hauling you away.
Especially against private entities. Your book publisher canceling your contract doesn’t violate your First Amendment rights.
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Bosses who say they want a 'team player'. That can mean they want someone who knows how to keep their head down, toe the line and shut up.
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There was a guy I was texting and I said something with the essence of "you are a nice guy" and he wondered how I could know since we've never met. It was obvious because he always listened and tried to work with my quirks. He never tried to force anything when I said I wasn't ready (this ranged from meeting to kissing) and was extremely conscientious of stuff I liked and stuff that bothered me. He was a good catch, just not mine :)
Growing up not especially having much, I can't stand people who are rough with expensive things, or careless with anything new. This might not make sense to a lot of people, but if I got a new jacket when younger I treasured it. I see people throw their jacket on the floor and not care, and I can't handle stuff like that.
Nothing wrong about having personal standards but it's what they are - context-dependent red flags that apply to particual people or circumstances. I'm not sure they can serve as universal, fit-for-all red flags, because personality consists of more than one (bad) habit or parlance. I would not judge a person's worth without getting the whole context first.
Thank you for this comment! This was what I was looking for in this entire thread. I understand that many of these red flags are true but others originate from bad or painful experiences, and I thought that there was a lack of context in some of the posts.
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Wow, this was very revealing. I don't normally click on these because I'm not in a relationship or planning to be in one soon, but so many of these were things that my mom exhibited. She blamed all of her problems on other people, never said sorry (and if she did she would always include a but), was always cutting me down, and always emphasized how NICE and what a good parent she was. Looking back, I don't think she was the best parent.
My biggest ones are: --Treats waitstaff, cashiers, janitors, sales associates, etc. like crap. --Doesn't like cats or dogs. --Talks more about what they hate than what they like. --Complements themselves, ie: I'm smart/good looking/great at X/etc. --Complains about PC culture and Cancel culture.
Cancel culture IS stupid. However, people who think that ANYTHING to do with others’ rights is “PC” are people who refuse to see the amount of inequality that still exists in the United States. For someone who has been privileged, seeing others achieve equality can feel like oppression. Insecure jerks...
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Today I learned that I apparently hates someone who generalizing plus judging other people after only a minutes knowing them
I see it now... "red flag" is just another word for "stereotype" and "prejudice" but for people who want to look like they are actually the good guy.
These avoid facing the issue directly, namely getting to know or find out what kind of person is this, who am I dealing with, what are they like.
I had to google the 48 laws of power. Wow. What a right wing, sociopathic, nihilistic, narcissistic, and greedy horror. Pretty sure most modern GOP/MAGA types in the USA love that s**t.
A red flag for me is people who categorize others based on their political affiliation without getting to know them as a person.
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It saddens and perplexes me to see people who are totally aware how horrible someone is yet still falls for them and defends them.
Why do so many people think this is about women hating on men? The red flags can apply to anyone, I can apply a few of these to former friends and colleagues, some of which I wish I had have realised sooner. People other than lovers can cause you pain.
Maybe someone made several accounts, and then downvoted all the comments? I don't know how else this would have happened.
Load More Replies... "If you can't handle me at my worst then you don't deserve me at my best".. Whatever happened to learning to controlling your emotions so you don't hurt other people.
What if they're referring to a physical illness they can't control that have led a lot of people to reject them during a flare-up? Maybe they just want someone who won't leave when they're ill and bedridden ?
Load More Replies... "This is just how I am, take it or leave it." These people do nothing to improve themselves and take no accountability for their actions. Everyone just has to accept them and compromise for them every single time.
are we being red flags by saying that we don't have flaws and complaining about others tho?
Red flag: a guy going out with a girl and refering to her as "the whore I went out with" when she is nota around anymore :(
Someone who expected an apology even though they know they're wrong.
"You're either for me or against me"...actually, I am capable of having my own opinions and still having a working relationship with you. I am allowed to disagree with you in a respectful way.
Two more: 1. People who never compromise. 2. People who have/had good parents and don't respect them, take advantage of them or aren't grateful for the things or advantages they give them.
I'm really glad that people finally talking about these things, it's not kindness when you try to tolerate the red flags, it's toxic.
When a person refuses to even acknowledge something you are extremely interested in. Personally, I am interested in cars. I can go on and on about cars, and I try my absolute best not to. When something really exciting happens in the car world, I want to tell people I like because I'm excited about it! It is really harmful to stop someone from talking about something they're passionate about/enjoy and then berate what they want to say.
Red flag: Bored panda not blocking the racist who has been plenty of hateful and racist comments and been reported multiple times.
And suddenly everyone is downvoted a few points...ooh whoever could it be XD (I upvoted you one bk)
Load More Replies... Red flag to me is someone's jealousy over how well others are doing professionally,personally etc.
Anyone who HAD to tell me they were Christian was always trouble . . . AND . . . Anyone who wanted to call me something else after I told them my name meant anything I said would be dismissed.
When someone posts hate speech like Amelija Janavicius has, don't downvote it, report it. Like I just did. Pandas don't tolerate hate speech.
Amelija Janavicius is only capable of one comment. All her posts are identical. Poor child; obviously not capable of functioning as a human being.
Mimi: To report; go all the way right on the dark menu bar : more > contact> report post I have reported her as well, I think she is friends with the staff...
Load More Replies... People who don't understand the concept of "Freedom of Speech" in the US and seem to think it means that they can say whatever the hell they want no matter how inflammatory or offensive without suffering consequences. Freedom of Speech means that you can say something without the US government kicking in your door and hauling you away.
Especially against private entities. Your book publisher canceling your contract doesn’t violate your First Amendment rights.
Load More Replies... Bosses who say they want a 'team player'. That can mean they want someone who knows how to keep their head down, toe the line and shut up.
Load More Replies... There was a guy I was texting and I said something with the essence of "you are a nice guy" and he wondered how I could know since we've never met. It was obvious because he always listened and tried to work with my quirks. He never tried to force anything when I said I wasn't ready (this ranged from meeting to kissing) and was extremely conscientious of stuff I liked and stuff that bothered me. He was a good catch, just not mine :)
Growing up not especially having much, I can't stand people who are rough with expensive things, or careless with anything new. This might not make sense to a lot of people, but if I got a new jacket when younger I treasured it. I see people throw their jacket on the floor and not care, and I can't handle stuff like that.
Nothing wrong about having personal standards but it's what they are - context-dependent red flags that apply to particual people or circumstances. I'm not sure they can serve as universal, fit-for-all red flags, because personality consists of more than one (bad) habit or parlance. I would not judge a person's worth without getting the whole context first.
Thank you for this comment! This was what I was looking for in this entire thread. I understand that many of these red flags are true but others originate from bad or painful experiences, and I thought that there was a lack of context in some of the posts.
Load More Replies... Wow, this was very revealing. I don't normally click on these because I'm not in a relationship or planning to be in one soon, but so many of these were things that my mom exhibited. She blamed all of her problems on other people, never said sorry (and if she did she would always include a but), was always cutting me down, and always emphasized how NICE and what a good parent she was. Looking back, I don't think she was the best parent.
My biggest ones are: --Treats waitstaff, cashiers, janitors, sales associates, etc. like crap. --Doesn't like cats or dogs. --Talks more about what they hate than what they like. --Complements themselves, ie: I'm smart/good looking/great at X/etc. --Complains about PC culture and Cancel culture.
Cancel culture IS stupid. However, people who think that ANYTHING to do with others’ rights is “PC” are people who refuse to see the amount of inequality that still exists in the United States. For someone who has been privileged, seeing others achieve equality can feel like oppression. Insecure jerks...
Load More Replies... Today I learned that I apparently hates someone who generalizing plus judging other people after only a minutes knowing them
I see it now... "red flag" is just another word for "stereotype" and "prejudice" but for people who want to look like they are actually the good guy.
These avoid facing the issue directly, namely getting to know or find out what kind of person is this, who am I dealing with, what are they like.
I had to google the 48 laws of power. Wow. What a right wing, sociopathic, nihilistic, narcissistic, and greedy horror. Pretty sure most modern GOP/MAGA types in the USA love that s**t.
A red flag for me is people who categorize others based on their political affiliation without getting to know them as a person.
Load More Replies... It saddens and perplexes me to see people who are totally aware how horrible someone is yet still falls for them and defends them.
