The number of babies born in the US in 2018 fell to the lowest level in 32 years, according to a 2019 report by the CDC’s National Center for Health Statistics. The numbers indicate an ever-growing trend of more and more young people, especially millennials, opting for a childfree lifestyle.
Even though the joys of growing a child are undisputable, skipping parenthood may often seem an appealing decision to millennials who face college debts and enormous costs of living. Instead, many opt for the freedom of traveling, experiencing things, and cherishing their personal independence.
But in order to find out why exactly so many people make the decision of a childfree life, we have to look at what these people have to say themselves. So we rounded up some of the most illuminating tweets on the joys of life without kids that will surely give everyone a lot to think about.
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This needs to be at the top. I never even realized this before but this is so important.
To find out more about why some people opt not to have kids, Bored Panda reached out to Amy Blackstone, professor of sociology at the University of Maine and the author of “Childless by Choice: The Movement Redefining Family & Creating a New Age of Independence.”
Amy explained that people opt out of parenthood for both internal and external reasons. In terms of the internal, “research shows that common reasons include a desire for autonomy, an interest in spontaneity, and a preference to nurture relationships with partners and others in their life.”
Another interesting finding according to Amy is that childfree people cite concern about the environment, concern over the state of world affairs, and concern for the children who are already here. “Increasingly, I'm hearing from childfree people that environmental concerns top their list of reasons for opting out of parenthood,” she said.
When asked about the kinds of joys that childless life can bring, Amy confessed she was happy to hear the question.
Amy, who leads a happy childfree life herself, said that “One of the most common myths about childfree people is that we live sad, lonely lives. Nothing could be further from the truth.”
“People without children report that they enjoy nurturing the bonds they share with their partners and friends, that they feel fulfilled by having the time and resources to give back to their communities, and that they appreciate the freedom to pursue a wide variety of interests, passions, and hobbies.”
Not to mention infertility is a thing, trauma is a thing, mental and physical health issues that are passed down are a thing. There are so many reasons someone might be childless and it isn't your business
Yes... that's all we want. if we feel like having a kid, we'll borrow a nephew or niece for a week just to get it out of our system
I refer to my human kids as "skin babies" all the time. They think it's hilarious. They also call our cats their brothers and sister
children are EXPENSIVE, it's beyond me to think that people have more than one of them. AND you have to keep spending to care and nurture them until they are matured and ready for the world on their own. based on the culture you are raised from, that could range from 18y or until they have a stable job and/or married themselves.
and all the people in the restaurant also trying to have a nice meal.....
As a childless/free/whatever woman who used to work 60-hour weeks until the pandemic hit, Iâm gonna vote no.
Plus when you realize nobody is actively destroying your house, you don't have to waste time/money on food they won't eat, & that you can own even mildly delicate things without fear.
Or working retail and seeing those little crotch goblins screaming and throwing s**t everywhere. I actually feel my ovaries shrivel up when I witness this.
Ha! My ex-wife did this at a gathering of my family once. No one ever handed her a baby again.
I love that the person who posted this is using an avatar of Princess Caroline, a character whose major arc on the show "BoJack Horseman" is that she really REALLY wants to have a kid.
Yes it's selfish not to create something that you parade around for attention and gifts, and stealing people's free time.
Day care costs $12000 a year for one kid....kids cost WAY more than $15000
This is SO annoying. I was told this so many times ! I wanted to be sterilised in my 30's, but they wouldn't do it, as I "might change my mind, as I had just gotten married". Never mind that we were both 37 and had never wanted children !! So I just kept taking the pill constantly so I wouldn't have a period, couldn't bear them !
Humans are such a bad design... now I understand villains in movies trying to change humans to lizards or something
What imbecile is trying to save their marriage by having kids?! That's probably the biggest challenge for any relationship and even the great ones don't always survive the transition of become parents.
Note: this post originally had 83 images. Itâs been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.
I just want people to stop pressuring others. Do what you want. I have neither a marriage or kids and it is exactly what I want.
My only problem with this entire post is that all of the tweets are people that are mad at others judging them for being childfree, but being snarky toward people who do have children. Your choices are yours, but remember that you were a child once too. Your parents went through everything that parenthood entails so you could be where you are today. If you want to be childless, go ahead. But don't be rude to people who have kids like (literally what some of the tweets sounded like), "Haha I have more money bc i didn't get a kid!" or "lol have fun with your noisy baby!" Don't do that. That's literally what you didn't want. You didn't want to be judged, don't judge others. If i have offended anyone with this, feel free to downvote and tell me by replying. Im not trying to be rude, but simply expressing my opinion.
This is true, I did feel a bit odd as I do want kids when I am older (lots), and this is judging people who do have kids... Just remember, we are the ones keeping the population going. No judgment to the people who don't want kids, but you shouldn't be judging us...
"keeping the population going" is actually not a good thing rn. except for that i completely agree with you.
Exactly. The population is at crisis. Can't support what the planet has. So that part I don't agree with. Oh or people popping them out like crazy for child support and gov child tax credits.
It sounds rude until you realize that those of us who have heard "you'll change your mind" 500 times no longer have the patience to be polite time #501. My stock response now is "mind your own f*****g business" because I am 1000% done being told what my feelings should be on the topic.
I was told I wouldn't likely ever have kids naturally. Spent a fortune on Infertility treatments. Without treatment I had 2 kids. Ended up both high risk preggies. In qnd out of hospitals and on full bedrest. I went through ALOT for my kids. People(more then ever) think their opinions are always better then others. I miss the days people mostly minded their own Fn business. Unless it was a dangerous situation of course
I actually know people who have blast raising their kids. Tonight one was telling me how her kids re-named Goodwill "Badwill" and how it's run by evil robots. I think some people have children so they have someone to play with. It works for them.
I can't get over it that people don't realize how rude it is to ask someone why they don't have kids. What kind of answer do they expect? "I don't want any", "I can't have any", ... Either way; uncomfortable conversation following.
I've got into the habit of answering "because I don't" whenever asked why I don't have kids. Usually shuts people up
I tell them to stop asking me about my sex life. How's your sex life, Carol? Are you using protection or not? Why? :D
I medically couldn't. It hurt like hell to be asked when we'd have kids, etc. I don't ask why they DID have kids, so why do they ask why some of us DO NOT?
I remember that pain. I saw all my friends having kids and I thought I never would. At a point, I was okay with that. But when I hit about 32, I realized I really did want them, and nature wasn't having it. But I finally had IVF at 39, and had my twins at 40. Best decision of MY life. Not for everyone though, and people shouldn't ask.
Because having kids is expected of women!!! Sad đ, but still true!!!
You mean people don't immediately produce a baby in response to that question?
Something yes
My godmom had a stillborn child, so that convo is always heartbreaking
I completely understand this. I didn't have kids until I was 40. Partially because of infertility, although I didn't realize that until later, but also at a point, I really didn't want any. I don't think anyone should ask these questions, because it is rude, and sometimes hurtful. And no one should be demonized for not wanting kids. But, I am a little sick of people that don't want kids acting like people that do have something wrong with them.
Ur sick??. Imagine the sickness PPL like me feel when we r constantly asked & told that it is something we "should" do like some sacred duty. & To ans ur Q the people having kids have something wrong with them cause they don't actually care for the kids. The machines r taking over. There r no jobs available even to people who work hard. We r overpopulated with depleting resources & destroying earth along with ourselves. Most people with kids don't care for the environment & just keep on producing like there's no tomorrow. & Then have the audacity to say there is nothing wrong with it. U yourself r gifting your own kids a poisonous earth. Forget active destruction, the fact that u exist causes ha to environment. I have paid my price, whatever destruction I produce will be counteracted by my bloodline not containing. But u pol disgust me cause u ruin innocent lives who have no say in the matter
Jaded Queen Good response!
krzysko no
@Louloubelle, never cared if people chose not to have kids or what. I agree, it's rude to be asked or pestered if you do/don't, then pestered for anything you say in reply!
Just a little of the shoe on the other foot... đ
It's a conversation really, more than anything else. Family, marriage,kids these r the most common things found on earth life. So people just ask that cause it's simple to assume that if I want it & it's common enough u would want it too. & Then we can bond over it or talk or whatever. If ur hobby is reading & mine is adventure sports than we don't have much in common in conversation. But family it's like "what happens". Don't take it so seriously. The real problem r assholes relatives, who just wanna get into your life cause they aren't happy with their's. Just give them curt & witty answers & most will shut up
Woets Good response!
Because I ate them
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I donât see why people are so sensitive about it though, just answer the question like you would with anything else. âWhy donât you have kids?â Answer: âI donât like kids, plus I wouldnât like being a mom.â I think most of the time theyâre just wanting to get to know more about you. So tell them. The conversation after is uncomfortable because you let it get set up that way. Just be normal. Iâm childfree and people have asked me a lot about it and I tell them the truth and we just deal with it.
Well, let's see... I was raped and it made me infertile. Comfortable now?Sometimes the reason is extremely personal and very emotional. I always wanted to be a mom. It didn't happen. There are couples who have lost multiple pregnancies. There are people whose children have DIED!!! Stop being nosy and leave people alone, FFS.
I don't mind people asking and then having a real conversation about why I chose not to have kids - but it's the barrage of demeaning statements and assumptions that follow that bothers me. I didn't choose to not have kids because I wouldn't make a good mother, I would make an awesome mum (my mother made sure of that). I also didn't choose to not have kids because I don't know myself enough yet and will certainly change my mind - I've known since I was a child that I didn't want to go that route and at nearly 40 I haven't changed my mind. I also didn't choose to not have kids because I don't like them, I'm actually great with kids. I just simply have no desire to have any of my own and I enjoy the life I live because of that choice.
Because for some people the answer to that question is extremely complicated. For me, I WANT to have children, but as an intelligent logical person I can come up with two dozen excellent reasons that I should not have children. Wanting something doesn't mean it is the ethically responsible choice.
@Mewton's Third Paw, Please stop blaming *us* for having emotions related to our status as parents/non-parents. And there is no way to make the convo comfy for some of us. Peace.
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I hate how it wonât let me respond to your pathetic excuses. Sorry youâre all so uncomfortable with being honest and normal. Kristen could just say âIâm infertileâ and thatâs a totally normal answer but she needs to be so sad for herself that she canât just talk to someone. If youâre on that level where you canât even speak and be normal, I donât honestly think anyone wonders why you didnât have kids. Leo basically says âI just CANT function.â Okay cool but donât complain if people expect you to not fall apart so easily.
Speaking as someone who cannot have kids: I'm completely fine with a childless/childfree life, but the worst part about infertility is having to deal with people judging my childlessness as some sort of selfish act, or something that can be changed with enough persuasion. I understand that asking people "when are you going to have kids" might seem like a natural conversational filler, but for some people, it could actually be a really sensitive topic that they don't want to get into at work/at a family gathering/etc, and any reluctance to discuss children/fertility should be respected. Infertility is not something I ever feel happy about having to defend or justify. Posts like this make me realise I am not alone, but I think it's sad that childless people are so often not respected as "complete" or "fulfilled" human beings. For some people, a childless/childfree is a choice. For some of us, it is not. Either way, we deserve respect.
Yes, it is extremely rude, but for some reason, people seem to feel that it is their main goal in life, to ask why someone doesnât have kids! Even if they donât know you! I am infertile, and we werenât even married, and didnât know that yet, but we kept being asked, were we having kids, and that it was best to start right away.. ( I was 34 when we got married, hubs was 27..) we just said we didnât know. But it really is no ones business but your own.. stupid me, thought of a comeback, after I found out I couldnât have kids was, oh no! I am going to buy a kid off the black market! But realized that was creepy.. now we are past 50, so nobody says a word.. frankly, I donât want anyoneâs personal opinion on my no kid situation!
Which is exactly why people should mind their own damn business
Selfish? I really don't get that. If anything, being unstoppable to spread your genes onto an already dying planet is selfish.
I just want people to stop pressuring others. Do what you want. I have neither a marriage or kids and it is exactly what I want.
My only problem with this entire post is that all of the tweets are people that are mad at others judging them for being childfree, but being snarky toward people who do have children. Your choices are yours, but remember that you were a child once too. Your parents went through everything that parenthood entails so you could be where you are today. If you want to be childless, go ahead. But don't be rude to people who have kids like (literally what some of the tweets sounded like), "Haha I have more money bc i didn't get a kid!" or "lol have fun with your noisy baby!" Don't do that. That's literally what you didn't want. You didn't want to be judged, don't judge others. If i have offended anyone with this, feel free to downvote and tell me by replying. Im not trying to be rude, but simply expressing my opinion.
This is true, I did feel a bit odd as I do want kids when I am older (lots), and this is judging people who do have kids... Just remember, we are the ones keeping the population going. No judgment to the people who don't want kids, but you shouldn't be judging us...
"keeping the population going" is actually not a good thing rn. except for that i completely agree with you.
Exactly. The population is at crisis. Can't support what the planet has. So that part I don't agree with. Oh or people popping them out like crazy for child support and gov child tax credits.
It sounds rude until you realize that those of us who have heard "you'll change your mind" 500 times no longer have the patience to be polite time #501. My stock response now is "mind your own f*****g business" because I am 1000% done being told what my feelings should be on the topic.
I was told I wouldn't likely ever have kids naturally. Spent a fortune on Infertility treatments. Without treatment I had 2 kids. Ended up both high risk preggies. In qnd out of hospitals and on full bedrest. I went through ALOT for my kids. People(more then ever) think their opinions are always better then others. I miss the days people mostly minded their own Fn business. Unless it was a dangerous situation of course
I actually know people who have blast raising their kids. Tonight one was telling me how her kids re-named Goodwill "Badwill" and how it's run by evil robots. I think some people have children so they have someone to play with. It works for them.
I can't get over it that people don't realize how rude it is to ask someone why they don't have kids. What kind of answer do they expect? "I don't want any", "I can't have any", ... Either way; uncomfortable conversation following.
I've got into the habit of answering "because I don't" whenever asked why I don't have kids. Usually shuts people up
I tell them to stop asking me about my sex life. How's your sex life, Carol? Are you using protection or not? Why? :D
I medically couldn't. It hurt like hell to be asked when we'd have kids, etc. I don't ask why they DID have kids, so why do they ask why some of us DO NOT?
I remember that pain. I saw all my friends having kids and I thought I never would. At a point, I was okay with that. But when I hit about 32, I realized I really did want them, and nature wasn't having it. But I finally had IVF at 39, and had my twins at 40. Best decision of MY life. Not for everyone though, and people shouldn't ask.
Because having kids is expected of women!!! Sad đ, but still true!!!
You mean people don't immediately produce a baby in response to that question?
Something yes
My godmom had a stillborn child, so that convo is always heartbreaking
I completely understand this. I didn't have kids until I was 40. Partially because of infertility, although I didn't realize that until later, but also at a point, I really didn't want any. I don't think anyone should ask these questions, because it is rude, and sometimes hurtful. And no one should be demonized for not wanting kids. But, I am a little sick of people that don't want kids acting like people that do have something wrong with them.
Ur sick??. Imagine the sickness PPL like me feel when we r constantly asked & told that it is something we "should" do like some sacred duty. & To ans ur Q the people having kids have something wrong with them cause they don't actually care for the kids. The machines r taking over. There r no jobs available even to people who work hard. We r overpopulated with depleting resources & destroying earth along with ourselves. Most people with kids don't care for the environment & just keep on producing like there's no tomorrow. & Then have the audacity to say there is nothing wrong with it. U yourself r gifting your own kids a poisonous earth. Forget active destruction, the fact that u exist causes ha to environment. I have paid my price, whatever destruction I produce will be counteracted by my bloodline not containing. But u pol disgust me cause u ruin innocent lives who have no say in the matter
Jaded Queen Good response!
krzysko no
@Louloubelle, never cared if people chose not to have kids or what. I agree, it's rude to be asked or pestered if you do/don't, then pestered for anything you say in reply!
Just a little of the shoe on the other foot... đ
It's a conversation really, more than anything else. Family, marriage,kids these r the most common things found on earth life. So people just ask that cause it's simple to assume that if I want it & it's common enough u would want it too. & Then we can bond over it or talk or whatever. If ur hobby is reading & mine is adventure sports than we don't have much in common in conversation. But family it's like "what happens". Don't take it so seriously. The real problem r assholes relatives, who just wanna get into your life cause they aren't happy with their's. Just give them curt & witty answers & most will shut up
Woets Good response!
Because I ate them
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I donât see why people are so sensitive about it though, just answer the question like you would with anything else. âWhy donât you have kids?â Answer: âI donât like kids, plus I wouldnât like being a mom.â I think most of the time theyâre just wanting to get to know more about you. So tell them. The conversation after is uncomfortable because you let it get set up that way. Just be normal. Iâm childfree and people have asked me a lot about it and I tell them the truth and we just deal with it.
Well, let's see... I was raped and it made me infertile. Comfortable now?Sometimes the reason is extremely personal and very emotional. I always wanted to be a mom. It didn't happen. There are couples who have lost multiple pregnancies. There are people whose children have DIED!!! Stop being nosy and leave people alone, FFS.
I don't mind people asking and then having a real conversation about why I chose not to have kids - but it's the barrage of demeaning statements and assumptions that follow that bothers me. I didn't choose to not have kids because I wouldn't make a good mother, I would make an awesome mum (my mother made sure of that). I also didn't choose to not have kids because I don't know myself enough yet and will certainly change my mind - I've known since I was a child that I didn't want to go that route and at nearly 40 I haven't changed my mind. I also didn't choose to not have kids because I don't like them, I'm actually great with kids. I just simply have no desire to have any of my own and I enjoy the life I live because of that choice.
Because for some people the answer to that question is extremely complicated. For me, I WANT to have children, but as an intelligent logical person I can come up with two dozen excellent reasons that I should not have children. Wanting something doesn't mean it is the ethically responsible choice.
@Mewton's Third Paw, Please stop blaming *us* for having emotions related to our status as parents/non-parents. And there is no way to make the convo comfy for some of us. Peace.
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I hate how it wonât let me respond to your pathetic excuses. Sorry youâre all so uncomfortable with being honest and normal. Kristen could just say âIâm infertileâ and thatâs a totally normal answer but she needs to be so sad for herself that she canât just talk to someone. If youâre on that level where you canât even speak and be normal, I donât honestly think anyone wonders why you didnât have kids. Leo basically says âI just CANT function.â Okay cool but donât complain if people expect you to not fall apart so easily.
Speaking as someone who cannot have kids: I'm completely fine with a childless/childfree life, but the worst part about infertility is having to deal with people judging my childlessness as some sort of selfish act, or something that can be changed with enough persuasion. I understand that asking people "when are you going to have kids" might seem like a natural conversational filler, but for some people, it could actually be a really sensitive topic that they don't want to get into at work/at a family gathering/etc, and any reluctance to discuss children/fertility should be respected. Infertility is not something I ever feel happy about having to defend or justify. Posts like this make me realise I am not alone, but I think it's sad that childless people are so often not respected as "complete" or "fulfilled" human beings. For some people, a childless/childfree is a choice. For some of us, it is not. Either way, we deserve respect.
Yes, it is extremely rude, but for some reason, people seem to feel that it is their main goal in life, to ask why someone doesnât have kids! Even if they donât know you! I am infertile, and we werenât even married, and didnât know that yet, but we kept being asked, were we having kids, and that it was best to start right away.. ( I was 34 when we got married, hubs was 27..) we just said we didnât know. But it really is no ones business but your own.. stupid me, thought of a comeback, after I found out I couldnât have kids was, oh no! I am going to buy a kid off the black market! But realized that was creepy.. now we are past 50, so nobody says a word.. frankly, I donât want anyoneâs personal opinion on my no kid situation!
Which is exactly why people should mind their own damn business
Selfish? I really don't get that. If anything, being unstoppable to spread your genes onto an already dying planet is selfish.